More like fairy tales. Given the anthropomorphic creatures and celestial objects.

For God’s sake Cher, you can’t go out to the castle in that armor. Do you want the enemy to easily stab you? Seriously, she looks like she’s straight out of a video game.

After the party descended into a drunken orgy, Mary Lou just wanted to go home. At the same time, she dreaded at the possibility of being a designated driver.

Are you sure the women aren’t just staring at your ass, Dick? Maybe that’s your “something” for the girls. Seriously, there aren’t many people who enjoy accordion music.

Seriously, this cover features a naked woman smoking a cigarette next to a flower pot table with a naked lady lamp on top of it. Because sex sells, everyone.

Tell me this woman is wearing at least a pair of underwear. But I wouldn’t be surprised if she isn’t. Also, she seems to predate Madonna by a couple of decades.

Yes, another nudie album cover. But this time the boobs are censored. Parent discretion is advised.

After all, she’s all business in the front and party in the back. But in a more tasteful fashion. Still, what kind of bra does she wear?

Betty tried her best to study hard despite wanting to hang out with friends. As her mother’s watchful eye gazed over her that evening.

You can tell they’re trying to appeal to men. And I’m sure they’ll be “relaxing” to this cover.

Because you can clearly see their tits. Also, they’re not wearing proper footwear for biking or helmets.

Heard she was Fishmate of the Year from Hook, Line, and Sinker Magazine. It’s for fishing enthusiasts and perverts.

Here a couple shares a drink with apparently no clothes on. Also, is the guy Harrison Ford? Looks like him. Not going to judge him.

Sure, everything’s being annihilated during a nuclear holocaust. But this guy’s still singing and wearing a suit. Even he’ll eventually end up vaporized.

Seems like this guy’s been stuck in quarantine way too long. Given that he’s taken to the bottle.

Okay, I don’t think the guy on the right is Elton John. But he sure seems dressed like him.

Look I’m sure he’s a nice harmless, guy. But smiling like that in that weird hair and placing his shoulders on a boy like that just gives me creepy vibes for some reason. Maybe I’ve heard too many stories on child sex abuse. I don’t know.

I don’t know about you. But I wonder if this woman’s got an eating disorder since you can barely see her boobs. Then again, maybe it’s photoshop.

For God’s sake, he’s wearing a horned helmet and fur vest. Resembles less of an opera singer or fierce Viking and more of a guy you’d see eating turkey legs at the Renaissance Festival.

Apparently, they haven’t gotten used to wearing their human body suits since landing on earth. Also, the women seemed to take their hairdos straight from an outdated magazine.

Seriously, the guy’s posing with Smurfs while wearing a bowler hat. Need I say more.

I get that these underwater shows are a thing in Florida. But why do an album? I’m sure it’s not a musical.

Because they’re all priests. Though I can’t be sure who’s playing the lead guitar. And the drummer’s only using a snare instead of a full set. Yet, they all can forget about groupies since a celibacy vow forbids it.

Seriously, I don’t think Angie’s in the mood to dance with Johnny. Doesn’t want to embarrass herself.

Here he is showing a picture of a naked woman’s butt. I’m sure the parents will be all right with that (sarcasm).

Would you trust these guys with valet parking? For God’s sake, why the hell am I asking that question?”

Though he might have something hidden in his hair. Perhaps a card, maybe.

Also, the background is cracked. Still, the guy looks kind of out of place in his porn stache. Not sure why.

Okay, he’s not Weird Al as a sea captain on too many drugs. But you’d almost assume that.

While the woman’s hair looks incredibly flammable and she doesn’t seem very comfortable with the guy. Then again, he seems more like a used car salesman than a Christian singer.

I at first thought she was a guy in drag by the look in her face. Still, she appears to see what her neighbor’s up to on her concrete patio.

Or does the guy near the silverware know that after posing with the food, the conversation will somehow descend to politics one way or another. And he knows many of his relatives voted for Trump.

As a commenter from Bored Panda noted: “That’s no miracle. That’s an evil ghost dwelling in your house.”

Brought to you by the 1970s magic of photoshop. And even by 1970s standards, I’ve seen better.

He’s got his banjos strategically placed. But hey, at least he’s not from Deliverance.. Yet, you don’t want to see your dad like this.

From Bored Panda: “Unfortunately, this album was Randy’s last call for help before his mother completely consumed him and he lived the rest of his life in her basement, never kissing, let alone meeting, a girl.”

Though why she’s dressed for a fancy barbecue I have no clue. But it’s not a suitable attire for hunting or riding.

Yeah, might want to pass on this album. Seems like a recruiting poster for a polygamist cult.

Says, “There are no bananas today” in Dutch. That’s a lie.

Heard she’s an Italian porn star who later became a singer and politician. So there’s hope for you yet, Stormy Daniels.

Here the accordion player does his thing while wondering if it’s all worth living. Contemplating the inevitability of death.

He was later busted for sexual assault on lady statues. #Metoostatue.

Seriously, didn’t Bill Cosby end up going to prison for pulling shit like this? For God’s sake, this guy either raped this woman or murdered her. Not sure which is worse.

From Bored Panda: “No, see, you were supposed to either prop the album up inside the fridge so when you went to snack you saw him glaring at you, or you tied it to a string and hung it in the middle of the kitchen doorway so it hit you in the face when you went to snack.”

Then again, we don’t just live on bread alone. However, we still need to eat. Though she’d be wearing a mask today.

From Bored Panda: “Unbeknownst to a lot of people, Star Wars was originally written as a rock opera, and the Red Guards were not Emperor Palpatine’s personal bodyguards, but were a band of travelling minstrels. Then George Lucas got involved, and the entire mood changed.”

Then again, they seem like the guys you’d meet in the ye Old Port Royal gay nightclub. Don’t ask about the booty there.

The women also wear skimpy lederhosen that wouldn’t suit the alpine climate. One even has her legs stretched.

You can see Dr. Neil Degrasse Tyson on his Twitter feed now. “You can’t roast hotdogs on the moon. There’s no atmosphere. You can’t even breathe or start a fire on there.” Way to ruin it, Dr. Tyson.

Okay, they’re a music duo. But the anatomical picture just looks really freaky.

For some reason, I have serious doubts she’s a virgin. Also, she should’ve known she was pregnant by now.

I don’t understand the sci-fi concept behind this album cover. I mean the guy’s in blue make up with a weird diamond helmet.

Is that a dead hooker in the car? Okay, that’s really disturbing. Hell, this whole album cover is unsettling.

Apparently, being surrounded by clowns can put you in a rather terrifying situation. Also, why isn’t Pennywise in here?

Seriously, this guy kind of reminds me of those bad 1980s prom pictures. Funnier that he’s wearing a shiny striped suit with a stern expression.

Of course, how they could fit in this old pop can, I’ll never know. Let’s not think about this one too hard.

Still, the guy’s posing with women who look awfully young. While his eyes bear some ill intent. Don’t like where this is going.

Yes, the animal masks are freaky. But what the hell are they doing in a hospital operating room with a fake body on the gurney?

Since his wife left him, Conway’s fashion sense has gone out the window. He’s kind of bitter about the divorce. His wife’s got a lawyer and is suing him for half his assets.

When we start settling Mars, we might have to train astronauts to be truck drivers. Not sure how that’s going to work out.

Those 1970s haircuts certainly don’t help either. That one guy in the back knows how lame this photo op is.

Then again, to each his own. After all, Ed could really be a nice guy. But that doesn’t help his hairstyle.

Actually he’s wearing a 1970s jumpsuit and a necklace. But yeah, he probably spent too much time at the tanning salon that day.

I mean the instruments consist of accordion, banjo, and electric guitars. Also, that one guy looks like David Hasselhoff.

Here he jumps to reach a star in front of a large crowd of people. While he holds a white guitar in his hand that matches his jumpsuit. Don’t ask me who came up with this idea.

Apparently, you can sit on it, too. As long as the long staff is well into your ass. Boy, that woman’s going to be sore. But for now, she’s reading like it doesn’t seem to bother her.

The one guy in the bathroom’s reading a newspaper with shoes and socks on like it’s nothing. While the women on the other side are checking him out.

Helps if you dress in a jingling bikini that resembles what Princess Leia would wear if Jabba’s palace was a disco. Yet, she doesn’t wear the long chain nor strangle a huge blob monster who used her frozen boyfriend as wall decoration.

I bet the mom’s like, “I shall call her Mini Me.” Hell, they’re wearing the same pink dress.

Man, these outfits are atrocious. Look at the pink top with gold sleeves. Is it 1970s or what?

They even have chain around a dog and one guy holds a big cigar. But badass they are not.

Seriously, why is her reflection appearing in the glass like that? Does she think she has something on her nose?

I mean she’s literally tied to a man by her wrists with rope. And she’s wearing a Sword-and-Sandal costume. So is she supposed to be dragged? Or is she kind of into it? Because I want to know how to feel here.

Still, I know they’re supposed to be prison stripes. But they kind of remind me of pajamas. Also how is he able to play guitar on the rocks?

Nonetheless, I think the cover is more appropriate for “Prisoners of Love.” Also, this pen seems to have a very generous conjugal visit policy.

Yes, this a soundtrack from a forgettable Jane Fonda movie. Still, naked in the jungle, what can possibly go wrong with that?

Okay, it’s probably not a porn movie and I apologize to anyone offended. Still, I’m sure these two are about to play “doctor” at any moment. Seriously, look how the guy’s grabbing the woman’s leg.

Apparently, the cover implies that a Roman orgy’s just a fancy toga party. But it’s more like a hedonistic free for all with drinking, partying, and group sex.

You’d almost think it was a 1980s version of The Office starring Jerry Seinfeld and Jason Alexander. Got to like that one guy’s shirt.

So, how can you roast hotdogs on the moon? It has no atmosphere so you can’t light a fire. Oh, those guys are climbing on the sticks? Was the designer on drugs?

Heard that he was a musician and shop teacher by day. And a porn star by night during the 1970s. Naturally, him and Adrien aren’t on speaking terms.

He wears a mask because he’s fugitive from another state. Not what he did. Still, reminds me of a Will Ferrell SNL sketch for some reason.

The one guy is framed in a star because he couldn’t make it to the photo session. But he wore the same outfit nonetheless.

Because “Terri” is a female rendition of that name. But the person kind of has a more masculine disposition. Then again, maybe Terri’s just gender fluid.

Funny, how one could easily pass as Matthew McConaughey’s grandmother. Hope she plays alright, alright, alright.

Heard he got his start playing polka music at a nudist colony. Then again, he seems to have stripped all his clothes off.

These guys have such blase expressions that they see no hope out of their boring and meaningless lives. Though I like that front man’s tie.

And yet his clothes don’t seem the slightest bit wet. Then again, it’s photoshop.

For God’s sake would you take the name Wilfahrt seriously? Also, that dancing couple seems all too happy.

Well, maybe Russians don’t mind women not shaving. Since they’re probably more focused on trying to get by. Still, she looks pretty silly in that outfit. Also what are those strings with balls supposed to mean?

So basically this cover consists of women mooning. I’m sure the moral guardians won’t be happy with that.

I mean the guy seems more right at home on Stranger Things. Also, is he smoking a cigarette?

So is he supposed to be the Yugoslavian equivalent to David Bowie or Boy George? Also the name Mandic is hard to take seriously as an English speaker.

Then again, it kind of makes sense. Since Italians are into soccer and high fashion. Still, the woman seems like a snake lady to me.

I think this might’ve become a meme. Still, I don’t think you can dance to that song listing. Also kind of reminds me of Matthew McConaughey for some reason.

Still, they shouldn’t be there. No, I don’t see anything wrong with women on a back hoe. But these women aren’t clad in the proper safety equipment. So they run a high risk of injury or death.

Seriously, why would anyone have a song about eating kids? Is this an album used to traumatize children?

After all, she wouldn’t want anything to scald her uh, boobs. Yes, I get that her boobs get considerable attention on this cover.

Because what makes a wholesome image of ragtime like seeing a fat rich guy being served by 2 hookers. Seriously, the woman’s putting some money in her stocking.

Despite that nobody dresses like that nowadays. Still, I don’t think he’ll find any gold with this album.

You can’t find a more country album like this. Apparently, his wife left him, his dog died, his pick up truck broke down, and he almost went to prison. And he probably has a drinking problem.

Yes, even the Beatles had their share of terrible album covers like a the infamous butcher cover. Fortunately for collectors, this one is worth a lot of money.

Ivory Chuck can always be handy with the piano keys. Yet, mess with him and he’ll strangle you and dump you in the river.

One guy is lying with his legs up on the piano like he’s supposed to be in zero gravity. Star Trek this is not.

Sorry, but I don’t think this album has any good information on surviving nukes. Seriously, if a nuke dropped where you live, you’re most likely to die.

And yet, they lie in street clothes in the snow. Outside a village with very small people. My guess they’ll end up like Gulliver before they wake up.

Nonetheless, Dwayne is determined to hold a beach concert as a low-budget Elton John with his keyboard and amplifier in tow. While his trusted dog is by his side.

Then again, to explore new sounds in space may require a way larger telescope than he could muster. And they wouldn’t sell it in stores.

Someone must’ve been on acid to design this cover. Seriously, you’d think she was from the VFD strip club from A Serie of Unfortunate Events.

Here William Holden sits in the study with a nervous smile. Hoping the band doesn’t play the “Colonel Bogey March.”

I’m sure any concert hall would have a harp there. I mean almost every one of them has a piano.

Sure she’s topless and wears high heel sandals. But ogle at her bare rack long enough and she’ll take you out her six shooters.

Wonder what the pilot’s going to do with that large wooden propeller. Hope he’s not thinking a threesome.

Yes, that’s Maya Angelou herself dancing to the fire in a strapless dress that she could stick her leg out. I know it’s kind of uncomfortable to see her this way.

If you had to wear a humiliating marching band uniform in high school, imagine having to dress up like Robin Hood while playing professionally. Because these guys look totally ridiculous.

Wonder what kind of songs would be on this album. And wonder if that music helps people to break the habit.

Indeed, this is album is meant to be played during sex. Nonetheless, I’m sure Barry White and Marvin Gaye are somewhere on the listings.

This is by a British Muslim hip-hop group from the 1990s which is still around today. Yet, the cover seems ripped from a foreign film about a guy with a thirst for revenge.

And yet, the cover features a truck stop waitress. Mostly because they think sex sells somehow.

Yet, the outfits are much to be desired. Seriously, plaid sport coats and drapery dresses?

Here he has his guitar in the garden. While he sings, “The Tax Returns Don’t File Themselves.”

From Mental Floss: “Poor Jeff looks like death warmed over, from his Herman Munster tan to that funeral director suit. I just hope the ‘something special’ he’s got for us doesn’t involve that hook.”

They seem awfully close to one another while drinking martinis. I think I know where this is going.

Oh, God, you don’t want to have 4 accordions in a room like that. That’s not a party. That’s torture.

Yes, this album features a lot of German drinking songs. And a couple of guys just have to enjoy a beer with a barmaid who might be a Vulcan.

Nonetheless, the crystal ball seems to magnify her boobs. Since the ball is almost totally transparent.

This is from Norway. Still, on the bright side, despite being stranded on their car, their music could attract flood rescuers.

Still, it features a very scantily clad belly dancer that would infuriate many Muslims today. Besides, are those nipple pasties?

Yet, he probably got that nickname while in prison for armed robbery. And no, I don’t think the bunnies soften his rough-hewn image.

I mean the one woman has a beehive that’s straight from the 1700s. And yes, this is a Christian album.

Seriously, is this guy even wearing pants? Maybe I really don’t want to know.

Ironically, Johann Sebastian Bach wasn’t known for being a perv. In fact, he was a family man known for fathering 20 kids with 2 wives.

So what kind of things does she sing about? Okay, I know religious music is most likely. But for all I know she could be singing about pina coladas or something.

Indeed, she’s touching the whiskers of a guy in a tiger suit. An early example of furry fandom at its finest.

Monty Python lumberjack-transvestite jokes aside, loggers aren’t known for their resilience. Should more appropriately be titled: Where There Walks a Logger There Walks a High Insurance Risk.

And yet, the wind has no effect on her large hairdo. Thanks to copious amounts of hair spray.

Man, that’s one freakish baby. Even has devil horns, fans, and claws. Still, Black Sabbath is a metal band so this isn’t out of the ordinary for them.

From Mental Floss: “Cody had the great honor of having his album title stolen by the writers of The Simpsons: in the episode “A Milhouse Divided,” after Milhouse’s dad loses his marriage and hits rock bottom he records a terrible album called “Can I Borrow A Feeling?” Sounds like Matherson should borrow a lawyer.”

Yet, she feels quite inadequate with her life. With a boyfriend who won’t give her the time of day and a dead-end job, Blanche often sought to live a fantasy life.

Seriously, his pants have seashells on them. Also, comes across as a rap artist Eddie Murphy would parody on SNL during the 1980s.

Yeah, this is pretty awkward. And here the girl sits on her dad’s lap as he explains periods.

Look into his eyes and you’ll see a soulless child from the Village of the Damned. Don’t let his smile fool you.

Seriously, look at their coats. Also, the woman’s bouffant is so garish. In addition, they seem like they’re watching a squirrel do something funny.

After all, children need clean hands in order to strangle the living daylights out of you. Seriously, those kids appear to be the stuff of nightmares.

Apparently, they don’t party very hard in Russia. Though I think the happy couple dancing must be drunk on vodka. Since the others have blasé faces.

However, this woman’s face says, “Not feeling it.” While the guy could almost pass for a 1970s porn star.

And yet, she dresses like she’s just been on vacation. Still, that face as she’s holding her monkey in sheer horror is priceless.

Sure they can’t see a thing. But they’re bound to haunt your dreams with their big hair and thirst for blood.

Yet, that doesn’t mean you should put nipple pasties on your man boobs. Also, is that a centurion helmet?

I’m sure any guy looking at this album cover would freak out over the saw in the crotch belt. Seriously, that looks really painful.

The woman on here doesn’t look right either. Yes, she’s smiling. But it’s a kind of smile you’d see on someone who’s high.

Okay, Hairspray first came out in the 1980s as a film. And this album was released at least a decade before that. But it’s not a great analogy. But still, they use way more hairspray than an average cast member from that musical.

Yes, this family looks so unusually happy at breakfast time. However, wouldn’t marching around the breakfast table be difficult if you’re holding a toaster. Because I know they’re not portable.

Yes, he thinks he’s so manly with a flute in his hand. Still, this is a perfect example on why classical musicians shouldn’t really do fanservice poses on their album covers.

I know it’s supposed to be Understand You’re Swede. But someone placed an apostrophe at the wrong place. Also, why the hell is the mom wearing a miniskirt in the woods?

Now it’s one thing if a man puts deer heads on his wall. But if he puts heads of his ex-girlfriends, you should probably call 911. I can understand that the woman is understandably creeped out since she’s found herself in a horror movie.

That has to be one of the most hideous suits I have ever seen. Those cars look pretty lame, too.

Guess it wouldn’t be bad without a little knight music. Still, I think it would be very hard to play a saxophone in a suit of armor. Hope he doesn’t go medieval on you.

Of course, Paul’s friends started to wonder whether he had strayed from his Lord and got into some hallucinogenic brown acid. Yeah, there must be something really wrong with him. This is freaky.

Note that the guy’s smiling face is juxtaposed on a dark painting depicting multiple murders. Yeah, kids do the craziest things sometimes.

No, Stacy, this isn’t a nice soak in a hot tub before dinner. Because you are dinner. In fact, you’re the main course. Favorite album of Dr. Hannibal Lecter.

Still, that image of someone pointing a gun just makes me uncomfortable for some reason. Perhaps because it seems like it’s pointed right at me.

Man, that man seems remarkably calm while riding a falling bomb that’s bound to blow him up to oblivion. And he has it between his legs, which suggests a rather subtle meaning entirely.

Who knew that they had vintage BDSM albums? Also, notice that this cover only features women.

Here’s what their page says: “For a lot of ages now, since aerly in the middle of 1968, we have brought our mark of by far musice to people of our country, and China also in dovesound. We have stipulated with many in the worlds. Now enjoying of ours fine becoming obsolete to the future coldplay confesses reactive ideas.” Yeah, they need spellcheck badly.

Guess this guy is in Florida since it’s the ocean. Still, the girl in this is dressed up like a ballerina in high heeled shoes.

Okay, this is creepy. With strings attached and an uneasy smile, this Christian woman is scaring the bejesus out of me.

Sorry, but people don’t associate plaid suits as a mark of godliness. Rather he’s probably a musician whose day job is a 1920s bootlegger on Boardwalk Empire.

Nevertheless, this design seems straight out of some horror movie from the 1980s. And it doesn’t seem something I’d take seriously.

No, I don’t want to see a guy like that coming down the stairs. I don’t care if he has a Bible in his hand. this guy’s creeping me out.

Still, if anything happens to that oil lamp, everything in that picture will go up in smoke. Not to mention, a lot of hair spray can make a coif like that particularly flammable.

These guys seem to take prison time with so much stride. Hope the real hardened criminals don’t do anything to their instruments. Because that would be bad.

Of course, he was probably aiming for realism here. Because who cares what you wear when you’re chopping down trees in the woods (besides protective gear)?

For some reason, they have kid choir juxtaposed with a person shooting up. I don’t know why they thought this was a good idea. Because it’s not.

Hopefully, this doesn’t have the kind of music that would wake the dead. Guaranteed to give you the “fun” in funeral before you take a trip the destination of 6 feet under.

For some reason, I don’t see a volcano destroying an entire city as one of a doomsday message of faith, hope, and salvation. In fact, it’s more like an apocalyptic scenario guaranteed to make me shit my pants.

A smoking dog playing the accordion? Now that’s pretty messed up. Wonder how they came up with that idea.

So let me get this straight, Marcel Marceau actually released an album? How does that work? Because he’s not known for his audio recordings.

Yeah, I don’t think being near electrical devices while soaking your feet is a good idea. Might get you killed.

Ironically, this was created by Union Carbide, the chemical company that brought you the 1984 Bhopal disaster in India that has left an estimated 500,000 exposed and 20,000 dead from its effects. It’s like an album saving ocean life that was produced by BP.

Uh, I don’t think property damage through nuclear holocaust isn’t covered. Because that’s considered a risky investment. Still, why the hell do they have a mushroom cloud on this album? Seriously, why?

For some reason, the people’s heads in this seem photoshopped to their bodies. Also, the kids seem like they’re straight out of the Village of the Damned wearing red suits. Bound to give anyone nightmares.

So this band is basically controlled by some old lady who’s using the musicians as marionettes. Do you see how messed up that is?

And it seems that the people are paying more attention to Jesus than the Man of Steel. Then again, after what he did in Man of Steel, I think Jesus might need to teach Superman a lesson in incurring collateral damage.

Then again, he might’ve mistaken the light for the sun. Or he might’ve meant it as a metaphor for a spiritual awakening. However, his suit on the other hand, seems like he bought it from a cartoon resale shop.

Then again, given the outlandish songs at costumes at Eurovision, I wouldn’t be surprised if someone performed this song in such a costume. Also, seems more like a funky chicken to me.

I’m sorry, but the guy in the album reminds me so much of Ted Cruz who almost everyone hates. And I’d not want him to put a gold chain around my neck.

Now that’s guy’s a complete idiot. Putting your money in your grill. Bet he’s going to regret that.

Apparently to them, the disco years are alive and well in outer space. Too bad, they’d look like they come from the 1970s on Earth.

Uh, dogs don’t go to school unless if it’s for service or obedience. Also, I don’t think dogs read either. Ridiculous.

I’m sorry but I don’t think confetti is even edible. It’s also quite flammable, too. So I wouldn’t want any near a stove.

Uh, does he have any idea that the dragon is burning up his guitar? Perhaps it’s not a magical object after all.

Let me guess, is this a disco album? Thought so. Still, they seem to do quite fine in a place known to have no atmosphere whatsoever.

Even more funny is that this features a straight couple as far as we know. Yeah, they’re totally not keeping it gay in the modern context.

I’m sure the kidnappers will have no trouble getting the ransom from her loved ones. After all, she seems like a gorgeous woman. But still, this is a really messed up cover. Being kidnapped and tied up like that isn’t sexy in most situations.

You know if it’s music to suffer by, chances are that you don’t want to listen to it. Also, the broken record speaks for itself.

Now this is really racist. Really, depicting African tribesmen as hostile like this really offends the people there. Seriously, they’re not all like that.

And another example of attempted fanservice gone wrong. Yeah, kind of seems like a mad guy having the shower curtain pulled on him.

No, I don’t think a guy trying on his girlfriend’s clothes is a good idea. Mostly because they’d mostly be too small and will be stretched out anyway.

Now this looks like it could pass for a mundane album cover without a fuss. If only if it weren’t that this accordion player has a very unfortunate name. Because the title is unintentionally hilarious.