Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree at the Ugly Sweater Party (Fourth Edition)


A perennial favorite on my blog during the holidays seems to be my ugly Christmas sweater posts. Of course, back in the day to receive one of these as a gift was a monumental embarrassment. Today, you’ll find plenty of people putting on these tacky apparel for Christmas parties. And sometimes the tackier the better. For instance, take what I’m wearing above. The sweater and the headband are actually my mom’s which she wore for a Christmas party at work. Because I don’t really have anything this tacky in my closet. And today, I’ll surely bring you more since you’ll find plenty on Pinterest or any online search. So for your reading pleasure today, I give you another assortment of spectacular ugly Christmas sweaters. Enjoy. By the way, some of these might not be safe for work.

  1. A holiday sweater like this makes you a favorite customer at Starbucks.

Funny, that the cup isn’t red. Perhaps someone didn’t want to piss off conservatives.

2. A Christmas tree sweater should have all kinds of bows.

Well, it kind of looks more like a dress. But you have to love the large star on it.

3. How about a mounted reindeer with lights?

This is kind of sick. But to be honest, it’s kind of hilarious. Don’t worry, the deer head is plush.

4. For Christmas south of the border, I suppose this poncho will do.

Sure it might fall under cultural appropriation. But since it’s a tacky rendition of “Feliz Navidad,” I’ll take it.

5. Hipsters might adore this reindeer top.

Because a sweater with anything else is so mainstream. And yes, you have the hipster glasses near the red nose.

6. As we all know, you can’t resist the presents under the tree.

Oh, she’s supposed to be dressed as the tree cover. Though that’s an awfully small tree on her head.

7. As we all know, Santa can’t be Santa without his long white beard.

Well, this Santa has a pretty long beard akin to Albus Dumbledore. Though you normally don’t see Santas with that kind of facial hair.

8. With this sweater, you’re always Walken in the winter wonderland.

And yes, this depicts Christopher Walken. You know him from hit movies and his distinctive voice.

9. Instead of a Christmas sweater, how about go with a Christmas skirt?

Okay, this is more cute than ugly. But still, it kind of counts since it’s in a similar style.

10. “Rudolph with your nose so bright, won’t you drive my sleigh tonight?”

As you can see, this sweater lights up. And yes, so does Rudolph’s nose.

11. “Fra-geel-lay. Must be Italian.”

After all, you can’t have an ugly Christmas sweater post without including one with the leg lamp. A tacky Christmas decoration that you’d ever see.

12. A mantle at the fireplace and a deer head are always great for couples.

Yes, it looks like someone killed Rudolph. But think how well it goes with the stockings hung at the fireplace.

13. Frosty can always make a great drinking buddy during the holidays.

Yes, that’s Frosty the Snowman with a beer can. And yes, he’s becoming a bad influence to children.

14. You’ll always need a warm fire when the stockings are hung by the chimney with care.

Another couple’s idea, apparently. Though the woman can wear hers all year long. The guy, not so much.

15. No Christmas sweater can do without some fuzzy fur trim.

Well, it has feathers on the cuffs and bottom. But it includes a hood with all kinds of tacky trimmings.

16. A Christmas vest should always include some tinsel.

Comes with matching candy canes, snowflakes, and green bows. Perfect for any Christmas party.

17. Seems like Grandma got run over by a reindeer.

Don’t worry, she’s fine. Just had to spend some time in the hospital. But the tracks are nonetheless permanent.

18. Apparently, the Abominable Snowman can spit out candy.

Okay, maybe not. But this is nevertheless hilarious, especially if you add tinsel.

19. Now your Christmas sweater can have its own snow globe.

Okay, this is in plastic. But it will certainly be a hit at any Christmas party you go to.

20. Seems like the deer like to frolic during the holiday season.

Okay, they’re just humping each other. So best not to wear this one in front of the kids.

21. For a more refined occasion, you might want to wear this evening gown.

Yes, this is an ugly Christmas dress. Not something you’d wear to a fancy dress ball. But perfect for an office party, sort of.

22. A Christmas suit is great for all yuletide occasions.

I see the guy wearing the Santa hat with his tacky suit. Sure it’s ridiculous but fun.

23. A sweater like this will make you a darling at any office bash.

Even has the words “Ugly” on it. Also includes plenty of pom poms and tinsel.

24. A present dress should always include a bow and tinsel.

All these ladies wear large red bows for their outfits. And yes, gift bows are a great way to decorate anything.

25. If you like A Christmas Story, than this is the holiday sweater for you.

Consists of Ralphie in his pink bunny outfit and the leg lamp. And all in felt, too.

26. Of course, no Christmas can be without a couple of ball ornaments.

Okay, this guy’s sweater is kind of risqué. Definitely not to be worn around children.

27. No ugly sweater can ever have too much tinsel.

Actually, you can’t have too much of anything on these sweaters. But she certainly rocks in her tinsel top with silver snowflakes.

28. As Santa says, “Ho, ho, ho.”

Though that phrase can also be used as an inside joke. But I like how the Santas are positioned here. So clever.

29. Sometimes a sweater can use a little bit of everything.

This one has a snowman with tinsel, garlands, bows, jingles, and baubles. Certainly stands out among many.

30. Nothing makes Christmas than some holiday Whoville fashions.

These girls even have the Who hair. Nevertheless, perfect for any day out in Whoville.

31. Green feathers always go well with any candy cane striped shirt.

This one even lights up as you can see. Though I’d more anticipate more decor relating to the Grinch on this.

32. A sweater like this is perfect for any family Christmas.

Though you wouldn’t want to spend Christmas with the Griswolds. Or anywhere near them for that matter.

33. You can always add more to any Christmas sweater.

His even has a deer in a stocking along with lights. But he doesn’t have a care in the world.

34. Perhaps a more layered look may suit your fancy.

This get up is essentially covered in bows. Yet, it has plenty of other stuff on it, too.

35. A Christmas dress can be just as snazzy.

This one has a tree on the skirt and bows on the top. All on black velvet, apparently.

36. Indeed, the North Pole elves have their own kind of entertainment.

This one has Barbie on a stripper pole as the elves shower her with cash. Ho, ho, ho indeed.

37. A cardigan can always use some tinsel and tulle.

But don’t forget to put on a few decorations as well. Certainly flashy for any festive occasion.

38. Guess you have an idea on what she has in her stocking.

Though looking at her you can’t help but be amazed on how she fit an entire bottle in her stocking. Nevertheless, this is pretty funny.

39. I’m sure you can have plenty of jingling on this sweater.

Includes spring tits, lights, and bells on the nipples. So you’d better not wear it in front of your family.

40. Christmas heels should come with a snowflake or two.

Well, these are red heels covered with green glitter, too. The snowflake is the finishing touch.

41. A Christmas sweater can come in all sizes.

And I see a couple of these are child size. But all certainly have their own bows for the tree.

42. Perhaps you might want your holiday sweater gift wrapped.

Though this one has a gold bow on it. Though the wrapping is in blue, red, and green.

43. You can make your own reindeer with a simple sock.

Well, that’s kind of ingenious. The antlers are quite charming as well.

44. A festive sweater should always jingle.

And if you live in Whoville, then this is the perfect Christmas sweater for you. Should go great with Cindy Lou Who hair.

45. May your Christmas crash and Bern.

But in a good way, since this has Bernie Sanders. Yes, I like his ideas. But I don’t think he would’ve won.

46. A green holiday suit always makes you a hit outdoors.

Yes, it’s certainly tacky indeed. Guaranteed to make people’s eyes sour with all the trimmings.

47. Seems like rocking in his yuletide get up.

Yes, that vest is certainly ugly. But those pants are just atrocious.

48. How many of those bears could you fit in that stocking?

The title on this one reads, “It’s a sad day for the bears.” Not sure exactly what that means per se.

49. There’s nothing more badass than Santa fighting a shark.

And yes, Santa really gives the shark a punch. Though Santa’s not known to be buff at all. In fact, on the contrary.

50. For Breaking Bad fans dreaming of a White Christmas, look no further.

Though to be fair, Walter White isn’t the kind of guy you’d want to spend Christmas with. Mostly because he’s freaking insane.

51. I call this one, “The Pizza Lover’s Deluxe.”

Because nothing brings cheer during the holidays than the great taste of pizza. Okay, maybe not. But this is pretty funny.

52. I’m sure this guy will eventually shoot his eye out.

It depicts the BB gun Ralphie wanted for Christmas. And yes, he does hurt himself using it.

53. Apparently, Santa might need a new belt or suspenders.

Since you can see his butt crack. Hopefully, nobody but the reindeer saw that. I hope.

54. I give you the Human Santapede.

Get it? Because it’s a human centipede and it’s for Christmas. Yeah, I know it’s disgusting.

55. You’d find this sweater delightfully Grinchy.

This one has bows on the sleeves as well as a plush Grinch in the center. And yes, there’s some tinsel for the trim.

56. After all, everyone loves a plush reindeer.

Well, it more or less resembles a moose with a wreath. But this woman’s not complaining.

57. How about a Christmas sweater for two?

This one is a naughty and nice shirt for couples. Though I wouldn’t want to have this kind of closeness at a holiday party. Think outfits should be separate.

58. If you’re a stoner, this holiday sweater may be for you.

It’s a pot gingerbread shirt. An unsurprisingly, it contains rose of gingerbread.

59. Care to look inside the windows.

Well, it certainly gives you a nice view. Seems like this sweater has a little bit of everything here.

60. I suppose a yeti is perfect for any white Christmas.

Though a yeti lives in the Himalayas where many of the people don’t. Still, this is pretty clever.


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