Of course, I couldn’t do a Hunger Games parody without including Gale Hawthorne. As you probably know Gale is Katniss’s childhood friend and hunting partner. As I said before, Katniss just views him more as a big brother/rebound guy but he’s quite handsome as you can see since he’s played by a Hemsworth. And he doesn’t really do much in the first two books besides poaching to help his family, getting brutally whipped, kissing Katniss, and saving 10% of District 12’s population during the bombings. And in Mockingjay, he distinguishes himself as a badass and intelligent military commander and soldier. However, unlike Katniss and Peeta, Gale has had no experience with direct violence prior to the Second Rebellion, nor has he been forced to kill other people or knows that everyone in the Capitol isn’t a monster. And the fact his hunting instincts lead to him depersonalize people. His impulse to rebel is driven by his hatred for the Capitol and the Hunger Games as well as his desire for revenge and victory at whatever the costs. Now Katniss and he may be similar in personality. But Katniss wonders whether Gale is going too far, particularly when he and Beetee create a bomb that plays on human sympathies by exploding and killing the rescuers. And it’s one of a few moments that drives him and Katniss apart.

Perhaps a good parody I thought for Gale would be ripping off from Les Miserables with “Stars.” Now the original is sung by Javert and basically sums up his philosophy that he is doing the Lord’s work by futile pursuit of Jean Valjean. And he vows that he won’t rest until Jean Valjean whom he thinks is damned for violating parole and stealing bread despite that most cops would have bigger things to worry about. I mean the guy really should be focused on catching other criminals. In the Hunger Games version, I have Gale swear to not stop with the rebellion until there’s victory when President Snow is as good as dead. Nevertheless, it’s a beautiful song despite Russell Crowe ruining it in the movie.

 

“Stars” (Hunger Games Edition)

Sung by Gale Hawthorne

 

There, out in the Capitol

A man with a white rose

Smelling of blood

Fallen from grace

All be my witness

I never shall yield

Till we come face to face

Till we come face to face

 

He knows his way in the dark

Mine is the way of the war

And if we shall win this at whatever the costs

We’ll have our reward

And if some fall

Like District 12 fell

It’s not

Our fault!

 

Stars

In your multitudes

Scarce to be counted

Filling the darkness

With order and light

You are the sentinels

Silent and sure

Keeping watch in the night

Keeping watch in the night

 

You know your place in the sky

You hold your course and your aim

And each in your season

Returns and returns

And is always the same

And if you fall as District 12 fell

You fall in flame!

 

And so it must be for so it is written

I’ll say down with the Capitol

And those who stand within our bombs

Must pay the price!

 

Now let me find him

That I may see him

Deader than dead

I will never rest

Till then

This I swear

This I swear by the stars!