Tag Archives: WTF?

May the Force Be with You Dressed in These Magnificent Star Wars Costumes

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

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A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far, a movie called Star Wars debuted on the big screen and has changed how science fiction movies have been made ever since. Inspired by Akira Kurosawa’s The Hidden Fortress (which creator George Lucas has acknowledged, by the way), this franchise is now a beloved institution for nerds everywhere featuring intergalactic battles, Jedi knights, droids, aliens, an evil empire, the Force, as well as the classic struggle between good and evil. Now 2 good sequels, 3 mediocre prequels, nearly 40 years, and millions of dollars in merchandise later, the Star Wars franchise has been enjoyed by generations of fans of all ages. You might see this by the sheer numbers of Star Wars stuff you see on the internet. And in December 18th, Star Wars: The Force Awakens will be released in theaters, that will reunite at least 3 members from the original cast. You might be asking as to why the hell I’m doing posts on Star Wars in early November when the new movie won’t be out for another month. Well, I can explain. For one, the new Star Wars movie will be out at a time when I’ll be busy with my Christmas posts. Doing posts on Star Wars now will get it out of the way. Second, I’ve already said I’d do Star Wars posts after I was done with the Hunger Games so I might as well stick to it. Third, Star Wars has millions of fans all over the world so doing posts on the franchise to cash in is a good way to get more views between Halloween and Thanksgiving. And finally, doing Star Wars posts early gives people plenty of time to see them. So there.

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Unsurprisingly, Star Wars does have a lot of fans who like to dress up for occasions like movie premieres, conventions, cosplay, and Halloween. And yes, the movies do have tons of costumes as well, particularly when you’re talking about Padme Amidala’s wardrobe in the prequel series, which would make her the undisputed fashion queen of the franchise. This is why I open with pictures of her. At any convention you’re bound to see people dress as Star Wars characters like Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Han Solo, Darth Vader, Chewbacca, C-3PO, R2-D2, Boba Fett, Yoda, Lando Calrissian, Obi Wan Kenobi, and others. But you’d also see people dress up as minor alien characters, minor droids, clones, Imperial Stormtroopers, Jawa, Rebel pilots, fighter craft, the Death Star, and more. Some may even have costume combinations like Princess Vader or Steampunk. And yes, you see people of all ages and sometimes entire families in Star Wars apparel. Some of these costumes may be bought. Others were created by the fans themselves. So for your reading pleasure, here is a treasure trove of the many Star Wars fan costumes that you might see on December 18th. May the Force be with you. Always.

  1. Sometimes even Imperial Stormtroopers need a day off now and then.
Nothing like seeing a couple of Stormtroopers walking their dogs on a quiet afternoon. Of course, I didn't know they wore any accessories on their uniforms.

Nothing like seeing a couple of Stormtroopers walking their dogs on a quiet afternoon. Of course, I didn’t know they wore any accessories on their uniforms.

2. Luke Skywalker is just as good with a lightsaber as he is with a blaster.

Of course, both take two hands to operate. One of which Darth Vader cuts off before he tells Luke that he's his father.

Of course, both take two hands to operate. One of which Darth Vader cuts off before he tells Luke that he’s his father.

3. As Star Wars taught all of us, a girl’s best friend is her R2 unit.

Because if Princess Leia didn't have R2 D2 to send a message to Obi Wan Kenobi, she'd be dead. Still, this picture is so precious.

Because if Princess Leia didn’t have R2-D2 to send a message to Obi Wan Kenobi, she’d be dead. Still, this picture is so precious.

4. Of course, you can’t have a Star Wars convention without Boba Fett, even if his armor is a little rusty.

Now this was a DIY costume but looks almost like the real thing. Well, minus the jetpack at least.

Now this was a DIY costume but looks almost like the real thing. Well, minus the jetpack at least.

5. Some droids costumes are easier to make than others.

Now this droid costume was made from stuff you'd find at a hardware store. Not sure what kind of droid it's supposed to be.

Now this droid costume was made from stuff you’d find at a hardware store. Not sure what kind of droid it’s supposed to be.

6. If you dress in the iconic Princess Leia outfit, make sure your hair looks like cnnabuns.

Yeah, the Princess Leia hairstyle might be the hardest part of that costume. Then again, it might be a wig.

Yeah, the Princess Leia hairstyle might be the hardest part of that costume. Then again, it might be a wig.

7. Look like a sunrise in this Padme costume from Episode II.

Yes, I know the love scenes in that movie were essential. But still, could've they just Anikan with an actor Natalie Portman could actually have chemistry with?

Yes, I know the love scenes in that movie were essential. But still, could’ve they just Anakin Skywalker with an actor Natalie Portman could actually have chemistry with?

8. Anyone can get into the Star Wars cosplay action, even the pets.

Let's see the humans are Chewbacca and Princess Leia. The dogs are Darth Vader, an Ewok, R2-D2, and possibly Obi Wan Kenobi.

Let’s see the humans are Chewbacca and Princess Leia. The dogs are Darth Vader, an Ewok, R2-D2, and possibly Obi Wan Kenobi.

9. When it comes to small children, you can always dress them as Ewoks.

Yes, I know Ewoks aren't well liked by some of the fans. But come on, this costume seemed quite easy to make. Not sure if I'd want the kid holding a spear though.

Yes, I know Ewoks aren’t well liked by some of the fans. But come on, this costume seemed quite easy to make. Not sure if I’d want the kid holding a spear though.

10. Because every girl should be able to be Princess Darth Vader.

Now this is a pretty princess you don't want to mess with. Because she'll either force choke you, blow up your planet, or cut off your hand with her pink lightsaber.

Now this is a pretty princess you don’t want to mess with. Because she’ll either force choke you, blow up your planet, or cut off your hand with her pink lightsaber.

11. Snow White Fett will always be the fairest bounty hunter in the land.

Of course, you have to like how she's wearing a red bow and has one on her helmet. Yes, you get costumes like this.

Of course, you have to like how she’s wearing a red bow and has one on her helmet. And she has 7 little men to help her.

12. Even Muppets like to dress up as Stormtroopers now and then.

Looks like Kermit and Gonzo are enjoying some time at Comic Con. Wonder if Miss Piggy is wearing a Slave Leia costume.

Looks like Kermit and Gonzo are enjoying some time at Comic Con. Wonder if Miss Piggy is wearing a Slave Leia costume.

13. As Queen of Naboo, Padme Amidala was the fashionista of the galaxy.

Still, I'm not sure if this outfit is complete without some epic shoulder pads. But yeah, she dressed this way a lot in Episode I.

Still, I’m not sure if this outfit is complete without some epic shoulder pads. But yeah, she dressed this way a lot in Episode I.

14. All this Stormtrooper wanted to be was a prima ballerina in Swan Lake. But parents had other ideas.

Now this is just hysterical. Still, I think the armor might put a dent in the drama though.

Now this is just hysterical. Still, I think the armor might put a dent in the drama though.

15. Of course, we all know that Darth Vader had to start out as Anakin Skywalker.

Now I think this guy is more rugged than Hayden Christensen. Then again, that's not saying much.

Now I think this guy is more rugged than Hayden Christensen. Then again, that’s not saying much.

16. “Help me, Obi Wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope.”

Now that's just so cute, isn't it? Love how the R2-D2 costume, which is DIY.

Now that’s just so cute, isn’t it? Love how the R2-D2 costume, which is DIY.

17. Looks like this C-3PO is going to a disco.

Yeah, a C-3PO polyester costume isn't very flattering. This is especialyl true with a blond afro and big gold sunglasses.

Yeah, a C-3PO polyester costume isn’t very flattering. This is especialyl true with a blond afro and big gold sunglasses.

18. Seems like this Anakin Skywalker has gone to the Dark Side.

Yeah, once a Jedi has yellow eyes, there's no turning back. Well, except maybe years later when you're on life support and Sidious is electrocuting your son.

Yeah, once a Jedi has yellow eyes, there’s no turning back. Well, except maybe years later when you’re on life support and Sidious is electrocuting your son.

19. Sometimes the best costumes in Star Wars conventions tend to be the most original.

Now this woman isn't a particular character from the franchise. She's the introduction as you look on her dress and purse.

Now this woman isn’t a particular character from the franchise. She’s the introduction as you look on her dress and purse.

20. What kind of Star Wars Convention would it be without Admiral Akbar?

Best known for,

Best known for, “It’s a trap!” Still, not sure why he’s a rather popular character in the franchise.

21. It’s said that Darth Vader fiddled while Alderaan blew up.

Not sure if a street musician in a Darth Vader mask is bound to earn any money. That is, unless he threatens to force choke you if you don't give him any spare change or adulation.

Not sure if a street musician in a Darth Vader mask is bound to earn any money. That is, unless he threatens to force choke you if you don’t give him any spare change or adulation.

22. Who says that Darth Vader can’t be sexy in a corset, garters, and miniskirt?

Let's just say reenacting some scenes from The Empire Strikes Back in this with your boyfriend is bound to be awkward. This is especially if he's playing Luke Skywalker.

Let’s just say reenacting some scenes from The Empire Strikes Back in this with your boyfriend is bound to be awkward. This is especially if he’s playing Luke Skywalker.

23. Of course, you can also dress up in Imperial Battle equipment to stand out.

Still, this little boy better watch out for Ewoks. I've seen how they destroyed such equipment with their technology and it's not pretty.

Still, this little boy better watch out for Ewoks. I’ve seen how they destroyed such equipment with their technology and it’s not pretty.

24. Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia do make great sibling costumes for Halloween.

Thankfully, these two kids have been around each other long enough to know that they're brother and sister. With Luke and Leia, this wasn't the case.

Thankfully, these two kids have been around each other long enough to know that they’re brother and sister. With Luke and Leia, this wasn’t the case.

25. When it comes to battle, clone troops know how to use the big guns.

Now that's a really convincing costume. I mean even the outfit looks like it's got some use.

Now that’s a really convincing costume. I mean even the outfit looks like it’s got some use.

26. Guess Queen Amidala doesn’t really want her picture taken.

Now that is a convincing costume. Wonder if it's bought or DIY. Probably bought.

Now that is a convincing costume. Wonder if it’s bought or DIY. Probably bought.

27. Seems like this Death Star is ready to blow up a planet.

Now this is a clever costume. Love how she used part of the Death Star as a skirt.

Now this is a clever costume. Love how she used part of the Death Star as a skirt. But yeah, it looks ready to blow up Alderaan.

28. Now I don’t know which character this is but looks pretty familiar to me.

Oh, wait, that's Princess Leia from Return of the Jedi. She's in disguise to defrost and rescue Han Solo.

Oh, wait, that’s Princess Leia from Return of the Jedi. She’s in disguise to defrost and rescue Han Solo.

29. If you don’t have a small child to dress as an Ewok, you can always use a plushie.

Now we all know that's supposed to be Princess Leia in the closest thing she'll have for camo. Still, it's a pretty creative Endor costume.

Now we all know that’s supposed to be Princess Leia in the closest thing she’ll have for camo. Still, it’s a pretty creative Endor costume.

30. It’s said that aluminum foil has some resemblance to carbonite.

From the looks of it, it seems like there's a sibling rivalry going on here. Still, this is a great costume combination though I feel bad for Han Solo.

From the looks of it, it seems like there’s a sibling rivalry going on here. Still, this is a great costume combination though I feel bad for Han Solo.

31. Of course, people tend to forget the samurai Stormtrooper from feudal Japan.

Still, I wouldn't worry about him when he goes on a rampage with his sword. Because we all know that Imperial Stormtroopers never hit anything.

Still, I wouldn’t worry about him when he goes on a rampage with his sword. Because we all know that Imperial Stormtroopers never hit anything.

32. You can’t have a Star Wars convention without a homemade Chewbacca costume.

Now this really looks like Chewie. Almost as if this costume was made for the movies.

Now this really looks like Chewie. Almost as if this costume was made for the movies.

33. Now I can’t do a post on Star Wars costumes without including Slave Leia at some point.

This is guaranteed to attract some adolescent boys and young men. Still, she did manage to strangle Jabba the Hutt to death in it.

This is guaranteed to attract some adolescent boys and young men. Still, she did manage to strangle Jabba the Hutt to death in it.

34. If you’re an X-Wing pilot, you can always take your spacecraft with you.

Now this is a clever homemade costume. Love how the X-Wing was made from cardboard boxes.

Now this is a clever homemade costume. Love how the X-Wing was made from cardboard boxes.

35. You don’t become a dark lord of the galaxy unless you wear a menacing mask and a long black tutu.

Now this is just clever. She even made the Darth Vader mask, too.

Now this is just clever. She even made the Darth Vader mask, too.

36. Looks like somebody isn’t happy with his daughter dating.

Just you wait, Han. Once he's Darth Vader and in Cloud City, he's going to freeze you in carbonite for Boba Fett to take to Jabba the Hutt.

Just you wait, Han. Once he’s Darth Vader and in Cloud City, he’s going to freeze you in carbonite for Boba Fett to take to Jabba the Hutt.

37. Of course, Yoda isn’t the only alien Jedi out there.

Seem to remember these two Jedi from Episode II. And I think they both died in Episode III.

Seem to remember these two Jedi from Episode II. And I think they both died in Episode III.

38. Finally, a Star Wars alien even James T. Kirk could love.

I think this might be a Twilek, whatever that is. Still, Captain Kirk would find her irresistible since he goes for green girls.

I think this might be a Twilek, whatever that is. Still, Captain Kirk would find her irresistible since he goes for green girls.

39. Of course, when your family consists of Han Solo, Princess Leia, and Chewie, you just have to get a Millennium Falcon stroller.

Now the Millennium Falcon stroller is so clever. Still, love how Chewie has a pink ribbon and purse. So cute.

Now the Millennium Falcon stroller is so clever. Still, love how Chewie has a pink ribbon and purse. So cute.

40. If you’re a mom, then a Princess Leia and Ewok costume might do nicely for you and your little one.

Now I'm sure an Ewok costume is quite easy to make. Just get a little teddy bear costume and hood. So adorable.

Now I’m sure an Ewok costume is quite easy to make. Just get a little teddy bear costume and hood. So adorable.

41. And you thought only men were Jedi. Well, you’d be wrong.

Still, unless we're talking about Clone Wars, female Jedi don't usually have speaking roles. They just function as extras in the prequels.

Still, unless we’re talking about Clone Wars, female Jedi don’t usually have speaking roles. They just function as extras in the prequels.

42. If you love Star Wars and the 1950s, then you’ll love this Wampa skirt.

Now this is just so funny. Who knew that you can mash up a maimed monster on Hoth with a poodle skirt?

Now this is just so funny. Who knew that you can mash up a maimed monster on Hoth with a poodle skirt?

43. Wonder what you’d do if you see Jawa at your door.

Ah, the Jawa, the guys who sold C-3PO and R2-D2 to Luke and his step uncle. Nice fellows. Sad they were killed by Stormtroopers.

Ah, the Jawa, the guys who sold C-3PO and R2-D2 to Luke and his step uncle. Nice fellows. Sad they were killed by Stormtroopers.

44. Remember, you’re never too young to be an X-Wing pilot.

Now this is so adorable. Wonder if he has a little X-Wing stroller.

Now this is so adorable. Wonder if he has a little X-Wing stroller.

45. While Slave Ariel might be as dumb as dirt, she knows her way around a fork.

Still, at least she uses her fork for higher things like strangling Jabba the Hutt. Then again, Ariel was never one of my favorite Disney princesses. Such an immature brat.

Still, at least she uses her fork for higher things like strangling Jabba the Hutt. Then again, Ariel was never one of my favorite Disney princesses. Such an immature brat.

46. Sometimes it doesn’t take much to do Han Solo in carbonite.

Wonder if that's plaster or something else. Still, this is a pretty clever, indeed.

Wonder if that’s plaster or something else. Still, this is a pretty clever, indeed.

47. Star Wars: a science fiction saga for the whole family since 1977.

Now this is just so adorable. Let's see we have Anakin, Padme, Princess Leia, Chewbacca, and Yoda.

Now this is just so adorable. Let’s see we have Anakin, Padme, Princess Leia, Chewbacca, and Yoda.

48. If you want a pretty Star Wars costume, you can always go with Padme’s from the lake in Naboo.

Reminds me of one of the costumes you'd see at a Renaissance Festival. That or something a Disney princess would wear.

Reminds me of one of the costumes you’d see at a Renaissance Festival. That or something a Disney princess would wear.

49. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you a Wookie Bounty Hunter.

Well, a wookie with some elaborate weaponry and tools. Guess Chewie would envy him since he can't afford all that.

Well, a wookie with some elaborate weaponry and tools. Guess Chewie would envy him since he can’t afford all that.

50. If you have daughters, you can always dress them up as droids.

In some ways, C-3PO and R2-D2 are the real heroes in Star Wars. This is especially the case with R2-D2 who keeps saving everyone's ass all the time.

In some ways, C-3PO and R2-D2 are the real heroes in Star Wars. This is especially the case with R2-D2 who keeps saving everyone’s ass all the time.

51. Didn’t know that cardboard can make great coverings for C-3PO.

Now this is quite creative. Still, I have to wonder how C-3PO got coverings after Anakin had been away from Tatooine for years to become a Jedi.

Now this is quite creative. Still, I have to wonder how C-3PO got coverings after Anakin had been away from Tatooine for years to become a Jedi.

52. Who knew that Ewoks walked on all fours.

Now this is an easy Star Wars costume for dogs. In this case, the dog actually almost looks like an Ewok.

Now this is an easy Star Wars costume for dogs. In this case, the dog actually almost looks like an Ewok.

53. Even among girls, Star Wars fandom tends to start at a young age.

Now I the guy here is Hayden Christensen who played Anakin Skywalker in the prequels. I think he's a shitty actor. Still, this picture is adorable.

Now I the guy here is Hayden Christensen who played Anakin Skywalker in the prequels. I think he’s a shitty actor. Still, this picture is adorable.

54. Now this Imperial Stormtrooper loves to do it the American way.

Yes, this is a Captain America Stormtrooper. Yes, it looks cool. But I don't know what side he's on.

Yes, this is a Captain America Stormtrooper. Yes, it looks cool. But I don’t know what side he’s on.

55. Of course, it doesn’t hurt for a Stormtrooper to dress in pink.

Isn't that a little short for a Stormtrooper? Still, even with the blaster, it's still pretty adorable.

Isn’t that a little short for a Stormtrooper? Still, even with the blaster, it’s still pretty adorable.

56. When it comes to introducing your kids to Star Wars, it’s doesn’t hurt to start early.

Funny, how Yoda is over 900 years old and is one of the oldest characters in the franchise. Yet, due to his size, he's more of a little kid costume.

Funny, how Yoda is over 900 years old and is one of the oldest characters in the franchise. Yet, due to his size, he’s more of a little kid costume.

57. Seems like Princess Leia cat sees something off with that Stormtrooper.

Well, even fans tend to dress their pets once in awhile. Still, I like the cat's Princess Leia wig for some reason.

Well, even fans tend to dress their pets once in awhile. Still, I like the cat’s Princess Leia wig for some reason.

58. Didn’t know that wookies came in all kinds of colors.

Now these are in pink, purple, and light blue. And they all have matching blasters. No, it's not a drug trip.

Now these are in pink, purple, and light blue. And they all have matching blasters. No, it’s not a drug trip.

59. Sometimes it takes two to make a costume.

Now this is an AT-AT. It was seen in the Empire Strikes Back. X-Fighters were supposed to tie their legs together and make them explode.

Now this is an AT-AT. It was seen in the Empire Strikes Back. X-Fighters were supposed to tie their legs together and make them explode.

60. There are some little girls who want to be Jedi, just like their mothers.

Now this is adorable. Still, I don't think female Jedi can have children if I'm not mistaken. Aren't they supposed to be celibate?

Now this is adorable. Still, I don’t think female Jedi can have children if I’m not mistaken. Aren’t they supposed to be celibate?

61. Nothing is cuter than a baby wookie.

Still, when they grow up, they tend to leave a lot of hair everywhere. Han Solo would know all too well.

Still, when they grow up, they tend to leave a lot of hair everywhere. Han Solo would know all too well.

62. Now this is what I call a Jedi family.

Still, that is no way to hold a lightsaber. But I wonder if the mom is supposed to be Padme or Leia in another outfit.

Still, that is no way to hold a lightsaber. But I wonder if the mom is supposed to be Padme or Leia in another outfit.

63. Queen Elsa isn’t the only one who can brave the cold.

Yes, this is the Leia on Hoth costume from The Empire Strikes Back. I think she kissed her brother in this.

Yes, this is the Leia on Hoth costume from The Empire Strikes Back. I think she kissed her brother in this and had some sexual tension with Han.

64. When you don’t have the makeup for Han Solo in carbonite, make the costume your color.

Now that's one way to work around it. Seems happy that he doesn't have to wash his face afterwards.

Now that’s one way to work around it. Seems happy that he doesn’t have to wash his face afterwards.

65. Of course, you have to shimmer like Padme in this purple dress.

I wonder if any of Padme's wardrobe designers are regular Renaissance Festival attendees. It would explain a lot.

I wonder if any of Padme’s wardrobe designers are regular Renaissance Festival attendees. It would explain a lot.

66. Sorry, but you can’t resist the power of the Dark Side.

Yes, I'm sure Sith lords have to hang out, too, you know. But, Emperor Sidious, stay off of Vader's kids.

Yes, I’m sure Sith lords have to hang out, too, you know. But, Emperor Sidious, stay off of Vader’s kids.

67. Seems that Princess Leia wasn’t the only one in her family with cinnabun hair.

Now this is another Padme costume from Episode II. And yes, it also looks like it's from a Renaissance Festival.

Now this is another Padme costume from Episode II. And yes, it also looks like it’s from a Renaissance Festival.

68. Of course, now that Star Wars has been bought by Disney, Disney Princess Jedi rule!

Now we have Mulan, Belle, Pocahontas, Jasmine, and Ariel. And all are wielding lightsabers but have no princes.

Now we have Mulan, Belle, Pocahontas, Jasmine, and Ariel. And all are wielding lightsabers but have no princes.

69. Now this Luke Skywalker can really use the Force.

Almost does look like an older Mark Hamil. However, I'm sure it's not him, since he has a toy lightsaber in his hand.

Almost does look like an older Mark Hamil. However, I’m sure it’s not him, since he has a toy lightsaber in his hand.

70. Seems like Padme enjoys the breeze of Tatooine.

Now I think this is in Tunisia. Not sure if it's safe to go there anymore. Not that I'd want to.

Now I think this is in Tunisia. Not sure if it’s safe to go there anymore. Not that I’d want to.

71. In the months ahead, it wouldn’t hurt to go as a Wampa.

Now this is how you design a costume for a winter monster on Hoth. Still, stay away from lightsabers.

Now this is how you design a costume for a winter monster on Hoth. Still, stay away from lightsabers.

72. Of course, you don’t have to be a girl to dress up as Princess Leia. Nor do you have to be a guy to dress up as Han Solo.

Don't know what to think of seeing Slave Leia in a beard. Still, doesn't look as bad as I thought.

Don’t know what to think of seeing Slave Leia in a beard. Still, doesn’t look as bad as I thought.

73. Now this Obi Wan Kenobi doesn’t seem too happy.

“Excuse me, but can you direct me toward the men’s room? Anyone?”

74. Nevertheless, you can’t  forget the touching relationship between Han Solo and Chewbacca.

Now that costume set up is adorable. I mean who can't love this picture with this little boy as Han and his dog as Chewie.

Now that costume set up is adorable. I mean who can’t love this picture with this little boy as Han and his dog as Chewie.

75. You might want to stop or these guys will shoot.

Just tell them that you don't have the droids they're looking for. Still, there's a chance they might look in your trunk, if they're smart.

Just tell them that you don’t have the droids they’re looking for. Still, there’s a chance they might look in your trunk, if they’re smart.

76. Seems like this is a job for Princess Leia Wonder Woman.

Now this is a Wonder Woman Slave Leia costume. She even has the cinnabun hair.

Now this is a Wonder Woman Slave Leia costume. She even has the cinnabun hair.

77. Looks like this Darth Vader has to take his AT-AT for a walk.

Now this is clever cosplay if you think about it. Still, the AT-ATs were huge in the movies.

Now this is clever cosplay if you think about it. Still, the AT-ATs were huge in the movies.

78. So I guess these are the Stormtroopers Luke and Han stole their clothes from.

Still, I think Luke and Han took their helmets, too, if I'm not mistaken. Then again, without the helmets it wouldn't be funny.

Still, I think Luke and Han took their helmets, too, if I’m not mistaken. Then again, without the helmets it wouldn’t be funny.

79. Don’t worry, Steampunk Leia is here to fix it and save the day.

Now you might see a lot of Star Wars steampunk mashups. Still, I think this is one of the best.

Now you might see a lot of Star Wars steampunk mashups. Still, I think this is one of the best.

80. Of course, it can be difficult to make a cute costume of the disgusting Jabba the Hutt.

Now this Jabba is so adorable that you'd wouldn't want Leia to strangle him. This kid must have very creative parents.

Now this Jabba is so adorable that you’d wouldn’t want Leia to strangle him. This kid must have very creative parents.

81. If you want a date, ladies, then C-3PO is the droid you’re looking for.

Now this is pretty clever if you think about it. It helps that he speaks millions of languages, possibly including Klingon.

Now this is pretty clever if you think about it. It helps that he speaks millions of languages, possibly including Klingon.

82. Nothing makes a woman feel more beautiful than her Jedi robes.

Sometimes I wish I could wear those. They look so comfy. Guess that's why Obi Wan Kenobi wore his for years.

Sometimes I wish I could wear those. They look so comfy. Guess that’s why Obi Wan Kenobi wore his for years.

83. Of course, it’s said that an R2 unit makes a great baby stroller.

Now this is so adorable. Still, you have to wonder if the parents had too much time on their hands.

Now this is so adorable. Still, you have to wonder if the parents had too much time on their hands.

84. Seems like Qui Gon Jin and Obi Wan Kenobi are together again at Comic Con.

Now this is pretty funny and I know the guy on the left is Obi Wan Kenobi. But those outfits look so comfy.

Now this is pretty funny and I know the guy on the left is Obi Wan Kenobi. But those outfits look so comfy.

85. This little Boba Fett has something for Jabba the Hutt.

Yes, I know parenting does take sacrifice. And sometimes this means being Han Solo in carbonite while your kid is Boba Fett.

Yes, I know parenting does take sacrifice. And sometimes this means being Han Solo in carbonite while your kid is Boba Fett.

86. “Step away from your X-Wing with your hands up, Rebel scum!”

Yes, this is a cosplay depicting an X-Wing pilot being captured by the Empire's fighter pilots. Yes, it looks kind of scary but they're fans having a good time.

Yes, this is a cosplay depicting an X-Wing pilot being captured by the Empire’s fighter pilots. Yes, it looks kind of scary but they’re fans having a good time.

87. Of course, it’s hard to tell who’s the master in this one.

I know that's supposed to look like Yoda training Luke Skywalker. But come on, this Yoda is a baby for God's sake.

I know that’s supposed to look like Yoda training Luke Skywalker. But come on, this Yoda is a baby for God’s sake.

88. If you’re a woman with a dog, why not dress up as Princess Leia and an Ewok?

Guess you can bring your pets to Star Wars conventions. Still, this is very clever if you think about it.

Guess you can bring your pets to Star Wars conventions. Still, this is very clever if you think about it.

89. Seems like Daddy’s little princess is taking a bad road to the Dark Side.

Then again, this Darth Vader is probably a great dad who's totally fine with his daughter dressing like that. Not like Darth Vader in the movies who blew up his little girl's planet.

Then again, this Darth Vader is probably a great dad who’s totally fine with his daughter dressing like that. Not like Darth Vader in the movies who blew up his little girl’s planet.

90. Now Padme Amidala sure looks lovely in white and ruffles, doesn’t she?

Now this is a lovely costume. Almost looks like the real thing. Then again, that's the magic of cosplay.

Now this is a lovely costume. Almost looks like the real thing. Then again, that’s the magic of cosplay.

91. Of course, I couldn’t do a post on Star Wars costumes without including General Grievous.

Now this guy is mostly in the cape because Grievous is a very skinny guy. But he does know his way around a few lightsabers.

Now this guy is mostly in the cape because Grievous is a very skinny guy. But he does know his way around a few lightsabers.

92. You can either go as an Imperial fighter pilot or as an Imperial fighter.

Yes, it looks a little flat. But it's cardboard. Still, you have to admire his effort.

Yes, it looks a little flat. But it’s cardboard. Still, you have to admire his effort.

93. Remember, the family that does Star Wars together, stays together.

Let's see, the parents are a Stormtrooper and Princess Leia. The kids are Darth Vader, Yoda, and R2-D2. Still, the tutu is so cute.

Let’s see, the parents are a Stormtrooper and Princess Leia. The kids are Darth Vader, Yoda, and R2-D2. Still, the tutu is so cute.

94. There is no bigger top dog in the galaxy than Pug Vader.

Yes, he might not look like much. But if you ever dare attack or fail him, he will force choke you with a vengeance.

Yes, he might not look like much. But if you ever dare attack or fail him, he will force choke you with a vengeance.

95. When it comes to Star Wars conventions, it’s best that you be careful around Darth Maul.

I mean this guy was one of the few to ever kill Liam Neeson. Think about it.

I mean this guy was one of the few to ever kill Liam Neeson. Think about it.

96. You never know who you’d meet as an X-Wing pilot in the Rebel Alliance.

And these two are holding each other's helmets. Still, in the original trilogy, why is it that almost all of them are men?

And these two are holding each other’s helmets. Still, in the original trilogy, why is it that almost all of them are men?

97. There is nothing romantic in the galaxy than a wedding between those giving their lives for the Empire.

Yeah, enjoy it while it lasts. Because I know that what they're suited is for the good guys to shoot at.

Yeah, enjoy it while it lasts. Because I know that what they’re suited is for the good guys to shoot at.

98. Of course, there’s nothing in a Star Wars convention than seeing a woman in her fashionable Jedi robes.

You see, ladies, there our great outfits that don't cause bodily discomfort. And they're just as practical as they are comfortable.

You see, ladies, there our great outfits that don’t cause bodily discomfort. And they’re just as practical as they are comfortable.

99. Some may feel blue, while some Star Wars aliens are blue.

I don't think you see these Twilek aliens in the movies. But I have seen plenty in fan costumes on Pinterest. Wonder why.

I don’t think you see these Twilek aliens in the movies. But I have seen plenty in fan costumes on Pinterest. Wonder why.

100. Some Stormtroopers just want to stand out among the others.

Yes, he might be committing a lot of uniform infractions. But unlike his peers, he doesn't care what Lord Vader does to him.

Yes, he might be committing a lot of uniform infractions. But unlike his peers, he doesn’t care what Lord Vader does to him.

Be the Mockingjay with These Hunger Games Craft Projects

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

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Of course, like most franchises, the Hunger Games has a legion of many devoted as well as misunderstood fans. After all, you’ve seen how this plays out with the merchandising. Yes, there are plenty of fans willing to buy anything even Hunger Games stuff that misses the story’s point. Another thing that’s prevalent among Hunger Games fans are the crafts. Just look on Pinterest or Etsy to see what I mean. Better yet, see this graphic above. Of course, we all know that most Hunger Games fans are teenage girls and young women and craft projects are seen as feminine activities. However, it’s pretty clear that most NFL fans are men and I found absolutely no problem looking for NFL craft projects either. Yes, there are a lot of female football fans out there but that’s beside the point. Besides, I’ve done posts on craft projects pertaining to material mostly attributed to men like taxidermy and wood sculpture. Yes, taxidermy and wood working count as crafts too, as well metal working. But guys don’t tend to admit that. Still, in this post you’ll see plenty of fan made craft projects attributed to the Hunger Games. Some of them may be cute and clever. Some of them might be in poor taste or have some disturbing connotations. Some might make you wonder what the hell were they thinking. So for your reading pleasure, I give you a treasury of Hunger Games craft projects created by the fans. And no, I don’t think many of them are licensed by Lionsgate buy screw them.

  1. Remember the third Quarter Quell with this commemorative necklace.
Now this has stuff relating to Catching fire. There's fire of course as well as the Mockingjay, arrow, and 12 for District 12. But you also see a clock and the pearl. If you haven't read the books or see the movies, you wouldn't understand.

Now this has stuff relating to Catching fire. There’s fire of course as well as the Mockingjay, arrow, and 12 for District 12. But you also see a clock and the pearl. If you haven’t read the books or see the movies, you wouldn’t understand.

2. Carry your thinks in this Hunger Games patchwork quilt purse.

Now there are quite a few of these. And you might see some of your favorite moments in a colorful tapestry.

Now there are quite a few of these. And you might see some of your favorite moments in a colorful tapestry.

3. Of course, there are always plenty of supplies in the arena at the Cornucopia.

Actually the Cornucopia doesn't look like this in the books or the movies. But let's just say plenty of tributes die there on the first day for obvious reasons.

Actually the Cornucopia doesn’t look like this in the books or the movies. But let’s just say plenty of tributes die there on the first day for obvious reasons.

4. No song is more iconic in The Hunger Games than “The Hanging Tree.”

Of course, this song is about a guy wanting his girlfriend to commit suicide with him. And it's possible that he might be the guy who murdered three. Happy stuff.

Of course, this song is about a guy wanting his girlfriend to commit suicide with him. And it’s possible that he might be the guy who murdered three. Happy stuff.

5. Show your love for the Hunger Games by making your own Mockingjay pin.

Then again, sure it might not be like the ones they sell. But it doesn't look that bad to me either. The bird is just perfect.

Then again, sure it might not be like the ones they sell. But it doesn’t look that bad to me either. The bird is just perfect.

6. If you like Catching Fire, then you’d sure like this Tree of Life pendant.

Not sure what the Tree of Life has anything to do with the Hunger Games. But it's nevertheless beautiful.

Not sure what the Tree of Life has anything to do with the Hunger Games. But it’s nevertheless beautiful.

7. Show your love for the Hunger Games with this Mockingjay blanket.

Kind of reminds me of an Andy Warhol pop art style picture. Of course, it probably too much longer to make.

Kind of reminds me of an Andy Warhol pop art style picture. Of course, it probably too much longer to make.

8. Be like Katniss and make your own bow and arrows.

I think set was used for a Katniss costume if I'm not mistaken. Still, let's nobody shoots anyone's eye out with that.

I think set was used for a Katniss costume if I’m not mistaken. Still, let’s nobody shoots anyone’s eye out with that.

9. Grace your home with this Hunger Games painted plate.

Since it's painted, it's used for decoration. But I do love the flames on this and the Mockingjay.

Since it’s painted, it’s used for decoration. But I do love the flames on this and the Mockingjay.

10. For those who love Seneca Crane’s marvelous beard, here’s a necklace of that.

Seneca Crane may not have been in the books or movies much. But man, his immortal beard made him a popular character.

Seneca Crane may not have been in the books or movies much. But man, his immortal beard made him a popular character.

11. Keep warm with this Mockingjay blanket.

So I guess the blue and red are there because they were the colors of the later tow book covers. But the Mockingjay stands as clear as day.

So I guess the blue and red are there because they were the colors of the later tow book covers. But the Mockingjay stands as clear as day.

12. Carry your things in this crocheted Hunger Games tote bag.

Yes, you see the Mockinjay a lot on Hunger Games stuff. Get used to it. It's a well-known symbol in the story.

Yes, you see the Mockinjay a lot on Hunger Games stuff. Get used to it. It’s a well-known symbol in the story.

13. Show your love for the Hunger Games with these Mockingjay bracelets.

Seems that they come in 6 different colors in this picture. Still, you see a lot of these on Etsy and Pinterest.

Seems that they come in 6 different colors in this picture. Still, you see a lot of these on Etsy and Pinterest.

14. Of course, you can always make your own tracker jacker nest.

Tracker jackers are genetically engineered wasps created by the Capitol to control people. They're fiercely aggressive and their venom causes powerful hallucinations and/or death. You're better off dealing with Africanized killer bees.

Tracker jackers are genetically engineered wasps created by the Capitol to control people. They’re fiercely aggressive and their venom causes powerful hallucinations and/or death. You’re better off dealing with Africanized killer bees.

15. May the odds be ever in your favor with these Hunger Games ribbon hair clips.

Seems to go with the Mockingjay symbol of all 3 books. And in the same colors, too.

Seems to go with the Mockingjay symbol of all 3 books. And in the same colors, too.

16. Show your love for the Hunger Games with this emblazoned Mockingjay hair piece.

Now I think that's an embroidered patch. But still, I'm sure Peacekeepers could see that thing from at least a mile away.

Now I think that’s an embroidered patch. But still, I’m sure Peacekeepers could see that thing from at least a mile away.

17. Love the Hunger Games? Well, you’ll love these moss and arrow bottle necklaces.

Yes, I know that Katniss's weapon is a bow and arrow. But I still don't know what to think about this.

Yes, I know that Katniss’s weapon is a bow and arrow. But I still don’t know what to think about this.

18. Nothing says Happy Hunger Games like a Hunger Games wreath at your front door.

Well, at least it doesn't have a festive design. But still,

Well, at least it doesn’t have a festive design. But still, “Happy Hunger Games” just makes me pretty uncomfortable.

19. Decorate your Christmas tree with this Hunger Games ornament.

Yes, nothing says,

Yes, nothing says, “Peace on Earth” than an ornament from a franchise about teenagers fighting to the death. Not sure if that sends the appropriate message.

20. Grace your home with these Hunger Games Russian nesting dolls.

Now this set includes Katniss, Peeta, Gale, Prim, and Rue. Of course, this is from the first book though.

Now this set includes Katniss, Peeta, Gale, Prim, and Rue. Of course, this is from the first book though.

21. Nothing makes you an ultimate fan than a Hunger Games iPhone case.

Now this is so adorable. And I see it includes Katniss, Peeta, and Gale, too. With Mockinjay pin, arrows, lighinting, and rhinestones.

Now this is so adorable. And I see it includes Katniss, Peeta, and Gale, too.

22. May the odds be ever in your favor with this Hunger Games locket necklace.

Now this is very pretty. Wouldn't mind having this myself. Yet, I usually buy jewelry at yard sales anyway.

Now this is very pretty. Wouldn’t mind having this myself. Yet, I usually buy jewelry at yard sales anyway.

23. Drink a toast to your favorite district with these Hunger Games wine glass rings.

And each district comes with its own different color and shape. Of course, you wouldn't be able to tell which districts they were by themselves unless you look close enough.

And each district comes with its own different color and shape. Of course, you wouldn’t be able to tell which districts they were by themselves unless you look close enough.

24. If you like Finnick, then you’ll like this shell necklace.

Yeah, Finnick may be seen as a pretty boy and ladies' man. However, in reality, he has a girlfriend with PTSD and is forced to whore himself to rich people in the Capitol. Pretty tragic I might say.

Yeah, Finnick may be seen as a pretty boy and ladies’ man. However, in reality, he has a girlfriend with PTSD and is forced to whore himself to rich people in the Capitol. Pretty tragic I might say.

25. Grace your table with a white rose from President Snow.

Let's just say if it's white and smells stronger than what a normal rose should, President Snow was probably there. And yes, it's okay to feel uncomfortable about it.

Let’s just say if it’s white and smells stronger than what a normal rose should, President Snow was probably there. And yes, it’s okay to feel uncomfortable about it.

26. Of course, drink with style with these Hunger Games wine glasses.

Both have Katniss and Peeta's names on it. Also, both have a painted Mockingjay on them.

Both have Katniss and Peeta’s names on it. Also, both have a painted Mockingjay on them.

27. Keep yourself warm with this District 12 beanie.

Wonder if they have these for all the Panem districts? Of course, I don't remember Katniss and Peeta wearing them in the movie.

Wonder if they have these for all the Panem districts? Of course, I don’t remember Katniss and Peeta wearing them in the movie.

28. Keep yourself clean with these Hunger Games bath and beauty products from Fortune Cookie Soap.

Guess this is the Quarter Quell collection. Funny that many of these come in shapes and sizes. One of the liquid ones called

Guess this is the Quarter Quell collection. Funny that many of these come in shapes and sizes. One of the liquid ones called “Blood Rain.”

29. Step outside with these Hunger Games shoes.

Each has the Mockingjay logo on one shoe and a quote on the other. And all are in the same color as the book covers.

Each has the Mockingjay logo on one shoe and a quote on the other. And all are in the same color as the book covers.

30. Snuggle up with an amigurumi of your favorite Hunger Games character.

Now there's Katniss, Peeta, Gale, Haymitch, Effie, Prim, Cinna, Rue, and Buttercup. Of course, this ensemble is from the first book.

Now there’s Katniss, Peeta, Gale, Haymitch, Effie, Prim, Cinna, Rue, and Buttercup. Of course, this ensemble is from the first book.

31. Like Foxface? Then you’ll love this sampler.

Yes, the girl from District 5 who lasted incredibly long in the Hunger Games without killing or making alliances. However, we're not sure about whether she knew the berries she stole from Peeta were poisonous.

Yes, the girl from District 5 who lasted incredibly long in the Hunger Games without killing or making alliances. However, we’re not sure about whether she knew the berries she stole from Peeta were poisonous.

32. Show your love for the Hunger Games by gracing this Mockingjay wreath at your front door.

Now this is pretty. And it has red, orange, and yellow streamers to emphasize how Katinss is the

Now this is pretty. And it has red, orange, and yellow strips to emphasize how Katinss is the “Girl on Fire.”

33. Sit your drink on a Hunger Games coaster.

And it has a rainbow Mockinjay. Still, not sure if it is of glass or lacquer.

And it has a rainbow Mockinjay. Still, not sure if it is of glass, plastic, or lacquer.

34. For those who love Effie Trinket, you’ll love this necklace.

Of course, the big flower goes well with Effie Trinket's eccentric fashion tastes. Seriously, she wore a dress of monarch butterflies.

Of course, the big flower goes well with Effie Trinket’s eccentric fashion tastes. Seriously, she wore a dress of monarch butterflies.

35. Show your love for the Hunger Games with these arrow pillows.

Available in 4 different designs. But I like the red one the best, since it's the more ornate.

Available in 4 different designs. But I like the red one the best, since it’s the more ornate.

36. Show your love for the Hunger Games by wearing this ring of fire.

Of course, you might not want to wear it for formal occasions. But it'll sure give you a lot of attention.

Of course, you might not want to wear it for formal occasions. But it’ll sure give you a lot of attention and make a nice conversation piece.

37. If you love District 12, then you’ll like wearing this coal and chain necklace.

Wouldn't think that they'd put a lump of coal on a golden chain. This is especially since that coal is becoming less of a viable energy source because it's an incredibly dirty fossil fuel.

Wouldn’t think that they’d put a lump of coal on a golden chain. This is especially since that coal is becoming less of a viable energy source because it’s an incredibly dirty fossil fuel.

38. Who knew you could make bows and arrows from Q-tips, popsicle sticks, and dental floss?

Yes, this was inspired by the Hunger Games. And yes, it might involve some pilfering some bathroom supplies. Still, these are so clever if you ask me.

Yes, this was inspired by the Hunger Games. And yes, it might involve some pilfering some bathroom supplies. Still, these are so clever if you ask me.

39. Cuddle up on the couch with this Mockingjay pillow cushion.

Now this is lovely. Seems like whoever made this might have had a bit too much time on their hands.

Now this is lovely. Seems like whoever made this might have had a bit too much time on their hands.

40. Decorate your room with this Hunger Games tapestry.

Consist of the Mockingjay logos you see on all 3 novels and in the same colors. Should go well with a lot of Hunger Games crafts.

Consist of the Mockingjay logos you see on all 3 novels and in the same colors. Should go well with a lot of Hunger Games crafts.

41. May the odds be ever in your favor with this Mockingjay bracelet.

Now this is pretty and more heavy duty. Doesn't hurt that it's purple, too.

Now this is pretty and more heavy duty. Doesn’t hurt that it’s purple, too.

42. Show your love for the Capitol with this woodburn sign.

Of course, we should know that the Capitol are the bad guys in the series. Seriously, these people force teenagers to fight to the death on live television for their entertainment.

Of course, we should know that the Capitol are the bad guys in the series. Seriously, these people force teenagers to fight to the death on live television for their entertainment.

43. Keep your money safe with this Hunger Games duct tape wallet.

And it has the painted flaming Mockingjay in the inside. Couldn't do one with my bare hands if my life depended on it.

And it has the painted flaming Mockingjay in the inside. Couldn’t do one with my bare hands if my life depended on it.

44. Decorate your Christmas tree this year with this Mockingjay ornament.

Well, the Mockingjay is a symbol of the rebellion against the Capitol. Yet, it's also a hybrid of a genetically engineered Jabberjay and a Northern Mockingbird.

Well, the Mockingjay is a symbol of the rebellion against the Capitol. Yet, it’s also a hybrid of a genetically engineered Jabberjay and a Northern Mockingbird.

45. Be the ultimate fan with this embroidery of the arena for the 74th Hunger Games.

Now I have to admire the craftsmanship here since it's very detailed. But we have to realize that 22 kids died there. Think about it.

Now I have to admire the craftsmanship here since it’s very detailed. But we have to realize that 22 kids died there. Think about it.

46. Support the rebellion with this Mockingjay bone necklace.

Of course, it's more likely made from shell than bone. But i's nevertheless pretty.

Of course, it’s more likely made from shell than bone. But i’s nevertheless pretty.

47. Nothing brings the Hunger Games spirit than a bottle of Nightlock berries.

Of course, those berries are poisonous that Katniss and Peeta made a suicide pact with them. You know so they wouldn't have to kill one another.

Of course, those berries are poisonous that Katniss and Peeta made a suicide pact with them. You know so they wouldn’t have to kill one another.

48. Remember Peeta’s love for Katniss with Peeta’s pearl necklace.

Said to contain a replica of a pearl before the arena was destroyed and he was captured by the Capitol. What happened to him after that was just so horrifying.

Said to contain a replica of a pearl before the arena was destroyed and he was captured by the Capitol. What happened to him after that was just so horrifying.

49. Remember the Katniss and Peeta romance with this commemorative locket.

Contains a peal, a Mockingjay, an arrow, and a locket. Of course, it's pretty devastating to Katniss that Peeta got captured.

Contains a peal, a Mockingjay, an arrow, and a locket. Of course, it’s pretty devastating to Katniss that Peeta got captured.

50. And in case you’re not fond of circles, they have a square one, as well.

Still, a square one makes sense. I mean it contained at least 3 pictures, consisting of Gale, Prim, and Mrs. Everdeen. Well, read the books, okay?

Still, a square one makes sense. I mean it contained at least 3 pictures, consisting of Gale, Prim, and Mrs. Everdeen. Well, read the books, okay?

51. Show your love for the Hunger Games by collecting these district accessories.

Includes all 13 districts as well as the Capitol. Still, each district is in the shape as its main industry.

Includes all 13 districts as well as the Capitol. Still, each district is in the shape as its main industry.

52. If you like President Snow, then you’ll certainly love his flattering portrait.

I think this is based off a Jennifer Lawrence cell phone photo with pancakes. Still, this picture is just so bad that I couldn't keep it off this post.

I think this is based off a Jennifer Lawrence cell phone photo with pancakes. Still, this picture is just so bad that I couldn’t keep it off this post.

53. May the odds be ever in your favor with these Mockingjay necklaces.

Available in 5 different colors. And they even have a picture to show how they glow.

Available in 5 different colors. And they even have a picture to show how they glow.

54. Keep yourself clean with some Mockingshea soap.

Now this is actually quite clever branding if you think of it. Still, don't know what's with the specks on top.

Now this is actually quite clever branding if you think of it. Still, don’t know what’s with the specks on top.

55. Celebrate your favorite Hunger Games couple with this commemorative mug.

Sorry, but "Peeniss" is an unfortunate couple name for Katniss and Peeta. So is "Katpee." Better to go with "Everlark," "Mellardeen," or "Toast."

Sorry, but “Peeniss” is an unfortunate couple name for Katniss and Peeta. So is “Katpee.” Better to go with “Everlark,” “Mellardeen,” or “Toast.”

56. Cuddle with the “Girl on Fire” with this Katniss amigurumi.

Now this depicts Katniss when she twirls her Catching Fire wedding dress. Still, quite cute.

Now this depicts Katniss when she twirls her Catching Fire wedding dress. Still, quite cute.

57. If you liked “The Hanging Tree,” then you’ll like this pendant.

Of course, I'm not sure if I want to wear a hanging tree around my neck. I mean the song is quite disturbing if you think about it.

Of course, I’m not sure if I want to wear a hanging tree around my neck. I mean the song is quite disturbing if you think about it.

58. Remember the Hunger Games with this charm bracelet.

Seems to have a lot of charms that you'd associate with the Hunger Games. Wonder if you can fit them all.

Seems to have a lot of charms that you’d associate with the Hunger Games. Wonder if you can fit them all.

59. The odds were never in our favor according to this sampler.

Of course, this would be the case in the Hunger Games. There the competition is deadly, literally.

Of course, this would be the case in the Hunger Games. There the competition is deadly, literally.

60. Show your love for the Hunger Games with this hair comb.

Now this looks pretty. Of course, contains the Mockingjay and some beads.

Now this looks pretty. Of course, contains the Mockingjay and some beads.

61. Keep warm with this Hunger Games districts blanket.

Now this one contains the 12 districts as well as the 3 Mockingjay images from the books. Still, wonder how the person had to hold it for the picture.

Now this one contains the 12 districts as well as the 3 Mockingjay images from the books. Still, wonder how the person had to hold it for the picture.

62. If you love the Hunger Games and To Kill a Mockingbird, then you’ll like To Kill a Mockingjay.

Not sure if I'd prefer a book that pertains a fight to the death as well as a lawyer defending an innocent black man. Still, quite clever.

Not sure if I’d prefer a book that pertains a fight to the death as well as a lawyer defending an innocent black man. Still, quite clever.

63. If you like Katniss and Peeta, then you’ll love these clay figurines of them.

Now these are so cute. Just have to love Peeta carrying his little loaf of bread and Katniss with her little bow.

Now these are so cute. Just have to love Peeta carrying his little loaf of bread and Katniss with her little bow.

64. Keep your CDs with this Hunger Games CD holder.

Not sure who still listens to CDs anymore. But still, it looks well made, regardless.

Not sure who still listens to CDs anymore. But still, it looks well made, regardless.

65. May the odds be ever in your favor with this knitted Hunger Games pin.

You have to admire the craftsmanship on this. Still, you wonder whether it will fall off if you actually use it.

You have to admire the craftsmanship on this. Still, you wonder whether it will fall off if you actually use it.

66. Like Rue? Then you’ll love this embroidery piece.

Yes, she's the agile tree climbing tribute from District 11 who Katniss befriended. Still, it's just sad how she was killed like that.

Yes, she’s the agile tree climbing tribute from District 11 who Katniss befriended. Still, it’s just sad how she was killed like that.

67. Remember Rue’s demise with this wreath with her lullaby.

Now this is a lovely wreath. But how Rue died is just so sad, especially how Katniss covered her in flowers.

Now this is a lovely wreath. But how Rue died is just so sad, especially how Katniss covered her in flowers.

68. Bathe yourself with these Hunger Games soaps.

Guess these consist of an arrow, District 12, Peeta's bread, and Rue's flowers and lullaby. And each seems to come in its own tin.

Guess these consist of an arrow, District 12, Peeta’s bread, and Rue’s flowers and lullaby. And each seems to come in its own tin.

69. Be the ultimate fan with this Hunger Games charm bracelet.

Yes, I know it's another charm bracelet. Still, are those purple beads supposed to be nightlock?

Yes, I know it’s another charm bracelet. Still, are those purple beads supposed to be nightlock?

70. Carry your things in this knitted Hunger Games purse.

And it comes with fringes. Still, you have to admire the craftsmanship on this one.

And it comes with fringes. Still, you have to admire the craftsmanship on this one.

71. Always know the time with this watch necklace inspired by Peeta’s locket.

I'm sure Peeta's locket didn't have a clock. Still, this is rather well made.

I’m sure Peeta’s locket didn’t have a clock. Still, this is rather well made.

72. May the odds be ever in your favor with this District 12 armband.

As far as I can tell, this is made of felt, which doesn't have much elasticity. Then again, perhaps it doubles as a bracelet.

As far as I can tell, this is made of felt, which doesn’t have much elasticity. Then again, perhaps it doubles as a bracelet.

73. May the odds be ever in your favor with this painted wood decoration.

Yes, I'm kind of repeating myself. But that's exactly what this wood image says though.

Yes, I’m kind of repeating myself. But that’s exactly what this wood image says though.

74. Commemorate the Katniss and Peeta love story with these pearl rings.

Available in gold, silver, and bronze. Still, if you don't know the significance of the pearl, then read the books.

Available in gold, silver, and bronze. Still, if you don’t know the significance of the pearl, then read the books.

75. Scrub up with these Tribute Collection soaps from the Fortune Cookie Soap Company.

Now these consist of soaps associated with the first book. For instance, the District 12 soap is coal.

Now these consist of soaps associated with the first book. For instance, the District 12 soap is coal.

76. Bake in the kitchen with this Mellark Bakery apron.

Yes, there's a line with Mellark Bakery stuff. Well, actually a few as I've seen on Pinterest. Don't ask me about it.

Yes, there’s a line with Mellark Bakery stuff. Well, actually a few as I’ve seen on Pinterest. Don’t ask me about it.

77. If you love the Hunger Games, then you’ll certainly love these trinkets.

Consists of Katniss, Peeta, and Gale. Nevertheless, they're all so cute.

Consists of Katniss, Peeta, and Gale. Nevertheless, they’re all so cute.

78. Have tons of fun with these Hunger Games wooden peg dolls.

Now these consist of Katniss, Peeta, Gale, Prim, Effie, Haymitch, Seneca Crane, and President Snow. Still, they're quite cute as you see.

Now these consist of Katniss, Peeta, Gale, Prim, Effie, Haymitch, Seneca Crane, and President Snow. Still, they’re quite cute as you see.

79. Show your love for the Hunger Games with this wire pendant.

Said to be about similar to the size of a penny. Still, you have to admire the craftsmanship and detail.

Said to be about similar to the size of a penny. Still, you have to admire the craftsmanship and detail.

80. Keep warm this season with your very own Hunger Games quilt.

Now this contains the Mockingjay as well as pieces to look like flames. Quite beautiful and intricate, indeed.

Now this contains the Mockingjay as well as pieces to look like flames. Quite beautiful and intricate, indeed.

Happy Hunger Games Merchandise

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

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So Nerdvember is off to a great start. Now most franchises have their own line of merchandise and The Hunger Games is no exception to that, especially with the fanbase and success that it has. I mean the books were bestsellers while the movies broke box office records, especially those with female leads. However, when it comes to merchandise, The Hunger Games finds itself in a unique position that poses a lot of problem. Now this has nothing to do with its popularity or whether fans will buy Hunger Games stuff. But rather, the fact that it centers around a story that contains rather disturbing material that fans and merchandisers may have missed. Like the fact that it takes place in a dystopian society that forces teenagers to take part in a televised fight to the death. Not to mention that many of them come from desperate situations like dire poverty like Katniss Everdeen herself. Some Hunger Games merchandise is fine, especially if it has the Mockingjay symbol. But there are some merchandise that is just plain ridiculous that it makes you wonder whether the people selling the stuff know anything about the series and what it’s about. So for your reading and viewing pleasure, here are some of the crazy Hunger Games merchandise you might see if you look hard enough.

  1. Keep warm this season with your very own Hunger Games snuggie.
Of course, this would really come in handy if your family is out of oil and you're too chicken to sign up for tesserae. Yeah, I read the books.

Of course, this would really come in handy if your family is out of oil and you’re too chicken to sign up for tesserae. Yeah, I read the books.

2. Enjoy countless hours of fun with Hunger Games Monopoly.

Of course, instead of having

Of course, instead of having “Go to Jail,” it’s “Treason, Become Avox.” For those who haven’t read the books, you really don’t want to be an Avox. And yes, it’s worse than going to jail. Much worse.

3. Smell like Peeta Mellark with your very own Baker’s Boy cologne.

I'm sure girls are bound to find the smell of burnt and stale bread sexy. Then again, reeking of baked goods might make a guy smell quite nice.

I’m sure girls are bound to find the smell of burnt and stale bread sexy. Then again, reeking of baked goods might make a guy smell quite nice.

4. For those who like to make gargling noises in the sack, an Avox thong is just the ticket.

Because to some people, nothing is sexier than a person who's been enslaved by the Capitol and had their tongue ripped out for committing treason. Yeah, pretty wrong on many levels.

Because to some people, nothing is sexier than a person who’s been enslaved by the Capitol and had their tongue ripped out for committing treason. Yeah, pretty wrong on many levels.

5. Show your love for the franchise with this Hunger Games bra.

I don't know about you but I have no idea why this thing even exists. Bet it leads to jokes like

I don’t know about you but I have no idea why this thing even exists. Bet it leads to jokes like “the odds favor lefty.” Good God.

6. May the odds be ever in your favor with this silver parachute necklace.

From io9:

From io9: “Considering the pain these silver parachutes eventually deliver, isn’t it a wee bit morbid to wear a silver parachute around your neck? Granted this particular parachute necklace is delivering Peeta’s special knock out broth, not death — but wasn’t the parachute symbol was forever tainted after the final book? Just saying.”

7. Show your mutual love for each other and the Hunger Games with Real or Not Real couples jewelry.

Because nothing is more romantic than trying to reconnect with your boyfriend after he's endured months of torture and brainwashing. Oh, and after he's tried to strangle you after being rescued from the Capitol.

Because nothing is more romantic than trying to reconnect with your boyfriend after he’s endured months of torture and brainwashing. Oh, and after he’s tried to strangle you after being rescued from the Capitol.

8. Let everyone know that you’re not someone to piss off with your very own “Muttation in Training” pin.

From io9:

From io9: “So you want The Capitol to murder you for entertainment, rip out your eyes, and turn you into a wolf? Yikes.” Basically sums it up.

9. Make your nails glimmer this year with China Glaze Capitol Colors.

Seriously, I highly doubt that any Hunger Games tributes would care about how their nails look. I mean they're taking part in competition where the competition is deadly, literally. I mean why?

Because teenage girls need to have great looking nails before they’re impaled before their funeral. Seriously, why does this line even exist?

10. Show your love for the Hunger Games with these quality flip flops.

I don't know about you. But I'm sure these shoes will serve no practicality whatsoever in the arena. Might want to stick with tennis shoes.

I don’t know about you. But I’m sure these shoes will serve no practicality whatsoever in the arena. Might want to stick with tennis shoes.

11. Have young girls reenact the Hunger Games with their very own Barbie dolls of Katniss, Effie, Peeta, Finnick, and more.

Then again, Twilight Barbies are probably worse. But still, does Mattel know what the series is about? Doesn't make it less disturbing.

Then again, Twilight Barbies are probably worse. But still, does Mattel know what the series is about? Doesn’t make it less disturbing.

12. Celebrate this Christmas by hanging your very own Hunger Games stocking.

Because nothing says

Because nothing says “peace on earth, good will toward men” like a stocking that says, “kill or be killed.” Yeah, how the Hunger Games fits into that, I have no idea.

13. Introduce your little one to the Hunger Games with a “Kill or Be Killed” baby beanie.

From Zimbio:

From Zimbio: “Want to raise your baby to be a badass nihilist? Start off by with a Hunger Games beanie that will prepare your newborn for a dystopian future where death is just a game.” Yeah, one of the most disturbing baby items I’ve ever seen.

14. Get your own Hunger Games look with Cover Girl’s Capitol Beauty Studio Collection.

Because as any Panem mother said, make sure you have a pretty face for you never know when you'll be impaled by a rival tribute. Seriously, Cover Girl what the fuck were you thinking?

Because as any Panem mother said, make sure you have a pretty face for you never know when you’ll be impaled by a rival tribute and turned into a muttation. Seriously, Cover Girl what the fuck were you thinking?

15. Fan of Haymitch Abernathy? Well, drink your own stuff with your own quality Haymitch mug.

Yes, it's made to look like a Jack Daniels label. And we all know Haymitch is District 12's town drunk. But still, his alcoholism is nothing to joke about after all he's been through.

Yes, it’s made to look like a Jack Daniels label. And we all know Haymitch is District 12’s town drunk. But still, his alcoholism is nothing to joke about after all he’s been through.

16. Like Katniss? Then perhaps you’d like some knee socks with her name on it.

From Zimbio:

From Zimbio: “Nothing too flashy here, just some super cool knee-high socks with Katniss’ name running down the leg. Now wherever you go, Katniss won’t be far behind.” Sounds kind of disturbing doesn’t it?

17. Cook recipes from Panem with your very own Hunger Games cook book.

From Zimbio:

From Zimbio: “A key to survival is knowing how to cook, which is why you’ll want to invest in The Unofficial Hunger Games Cookbook. Sure, Rue’s Roasted Parsnips, Grilled Tree Rat with Peanut Butter Dipping Sauce, and Plutarch Heavensbee’s Roasted Sucking Pig Surprise might not seem like fine dining, but, come on, Katniss had to eat squirrels for dinner.”

18. Make your home smell like hard liquor with your very own Haymitch scented candle.

Said to smell like rum, whiskey, and bourbon. Add to that PTSD, emotional heartache, and survivor guilt. No wonder he drinks.

Said to smell like rum, whiskey, and bourbon. Add to that PTSD, emotional heartache from losing your family and girlfriend, survivor guilt, and anguish over having to send 46 kids to their deaths. No wonder he drinks.

19. Make your home smell of roses with this President Snow scented candle.

From the label:

From the label: “President Snow may be an evil, ruthless, dictator but he sure smells delightful! His genetically engineered rose smells just as sweet as the real thing, and leaves no lingering taste of blood.” Okay, do you really want your home to smell like a guy fans call “Evil Santa Claus?” Think about it.

20. Survive the wilderness with your very own Hunger Games duffel bag.

Comes in all 12 districts. Perfect for storing weapons and supplies as you hunt down your peers.

Comes in all 12 districts. Perfect for storing weapons and supplies as you hunt down your peers.

21. Step into Capitol fashion with these Hunger Games high heeled shoes.

Well, at least they aren't flip flops and might be of some use for tributes. But once in the arena, then they'll make it easy for your rivals to kill you.

Well, at least they aren’t flip flops and might be of some use for tributes. But once in the arena, then they’ll make it easy for your rivals to kill you.

22. Celebrate the Mockingjay Part 2 premiere with a “Happy Hunger Games” Banner.

Uh, to me the notion, "Happy Hunger Games" is pretty disturbing. Kind of suggests that the Hunger Games are a more festive event instead of the horrible sick show they are.

Uh, to me the notion, “Happy Hunger Games” is pretty disturbing. Kind of suggests that the Hunger Games are a more festive event instead of the horrible sick show they are.

23. Remember, to keep in mind and wish all peace, love, and Hunger Games.

Peace, love, and Hunger Games? What the fuck? Does the designer have any idea that the Hunger Games is the exact opposite of peace and love. War, hate, and Hunger Games would've been more appropriate.

Peace, love, and Hunger Games? What the fuck? Does the designer have any idea that the Hunger Games is the exact opposite of peace and love. War, Hate, and Hunger Games would be more appropriate.

24. Refresh yourself with some Hunger Games H2O spring water.

Then again, it's probably much cleaner than whatever water Katniss has ever drank in her life. Still, it's the preferred drink when you're being chased to death by your peers for sport.

Then again, it’s probably much cleaner than whatever water Katniss has ever drank in her life. Still, it’s the preferred drink when you’re being chased to death by your peers for sport.

25. Support your favorite district in Catching Fire with your very own Victor T-Shirt.

Yeah, I know that hardcore fans may identify with certain districts like Harry Potter fans "sort" themselves into different houses at Hogwarts. However, in Catching Fire, victors from each district were forced to kill other kids to survive the games. Also, does anyone care about non-essential districts like 6? You know the one where the victors were both drug addicts.

Yeah, I know that hardcore fans may identify with certain districts like Harry Potter fans “sort” themselves into different houses at Hogwarts. However, in Catching Fire, victors from each district were forced to kill other kids to survive the games. It’s not like being at Hogwarts. Also, does anyone care about non-essential districts like 6? You know the one where the victors were both drug addicts.

26. Reenact the Hunger Games with your very own Katniss Everdeen action figure.

Now I do think Katniss Everdeen is a feminist role model and a great female character in her own right. However, we should understand that while Katniss may look badass with her bow, she's an unwilling pawn in the Capitol's twisted games. Making her an action figure makes her seem like she's in control but she's not.

Now I do think Katniss Everdeen is a feminist role model and a great female character in her own right. However, we should understand that while Katniss may look badass with her bow, she’s an unwilling pawn in the Capitol’s twisted games. Making her an action figure makes her seem like she’s in control but she’s not.

27. Kids, show your love for the Hunger Games by wearing this “I Love Capitol City” T-shirt.

For the last time, the Hunger Games involves the ritual slaughter of kids slaughtering each other as entertainment for the masses. It's not Harry Potter. Besides, the Panem Capitol is such a den of scum and villainy that it makes Mos Eisley space port look tame in comparison.

For the last time, the Hunger Games involves the ritual slaughter of kids slaughtering each other as entertainment for the masses. It’s not Harry Potter. Besides, the Panem Capitol is such a den of scum and villainy that it makes Mos Eisley space port look tame in comparison.

28. Help your baby be a future tribute with their very own Panem district bibs.

Does anyone think the notion of Hunger Games baby stuff is disturbing? Seriously, the best thing I can say about this that it's from District 12.

Does anyone think the notion of Hunger Games baby stuff is disturbing? Seriously, the best thing I can say about this that it’s from District 12.

29. Clean your hands with some Nightlock hand soap.

You mean the soap from those poison berries that killed Foxface? Uh, no thanks. I'll just keep my hands dirty.

You mean the soap from those poison berries that killed Foxface? Uh, no thanks. I’ll just keep my hands dirty this time.

30. For a more romantic theme, go with a “Real or Not Real” party banner.

Yes, those words might be romantic. But come on, they alone don't detract from the fact at the time Peeta was severely tortured with tracker jacker venom and other mental conditioning that made him almost kill Katniss.

Yes, those words might be romantic. But come on, they alone don’t detract from the fact at the time Peeta was severely tortured with tracker jacker venom and other mental conditioning that made him almost kill Katniss.

31. May the odds be ever in your flavor with this Hunger Games spoon.

I may not be an expert in cutlery. However, as someone who's familiar with the Hunger Games, this is in very poor taste.

I may not be an expert in cutlery. However, as someone who’s familiar with the Hunger Games, this is in very poor taste.

32. This Christmas, decorate your tree with these Hunger Games reaping ball ornaments.

Yeah, those things that have the kids names to select for Reaping Day. Really disturbing if you ask me.

Yeah, those things that have the kids names to select for Reaping Day. Really disturbing if you ask me.

33. Support the Capitol with your very own President Snow bracelet.

From Entertainment Weekly: "Forget Team Peeta and Team Gale, it’s all about Team Snow. Why not show your support for the misunderstood fascist dictator with this rose and Capitol seal bracelet? It is pretty, but isn’t the thought of wearing the emblem of an evil ruler (who doesn’t even have cool magical powers) a little disturbing?"

From Entertainment Weekly: “Forget Team Peeta and Team Gale, it’s all about Team Snow. Why not show your support for the misunderstood fascist dictator with this rose and Capitol seal bracelet? It is pretty, but isn’t the thought of wearing the emblem of an evil ruler (who doesn’t even have cool magical powers) a little disturbing?”

34. Show your support for Team Peeta with these pink panties.

In case you can't read the fine print, it says "A sensitive soul with great buns." Yeah, nothing says support in a death match than wearing their name across your butt.

In case you can’t read the fine print, it says “A sensitive soul…with great buns.” Yeah, nothing says support in a death match than wearing their name across your butt.

35. If you also like Peeta, then you’ll love this pink iphone case.

I'm sure we all do. But still, don't you think such support is kind of ridiculous? Seriously, why?

I’m sure we all do. But still, don’t you think such support is kind of ridiculous? Seriously, why?

36. Nothing shows your support for the Hunger Games than wearing a reaping orb around your neck with a chain.

Come on, why the hell would anyone make this? You know the names that come out usually have a less than 10% chance of coming home alive.

Come on, why the hell would anyone make this? You know the names that come out usually have a less than 10% chance of coming home alive.

37. For Catching Fire, don’t forget to grab some fiery footlongs at your neighborhood Subway.

Of course, this is no longer available but I had to put in. I mean The Hunger Games revolves around post-apocalyptic starvation. Maybe they should've went with hoagies containing meat from squirrels, rabbits, or rats on burned or stale bread. That would've been more appropriate.

Of course, this is no longer available but I had to put in. I mean The Hunger Games revolves around post-apocalyptic starvation. Maybe they should’ve went with hoagies containing meat from squirrels, rabbits, or rats on burned or stale bread. That would’ve been more appropriate.

38. Show your love for the Hunger Games with these “Mockingjay with Flames” socks.

I know they took the design from the poster. But it kind of looks like the Mockingjay is going down in flames. And we know that Katniss is seen as the Mockingjay.

I know they took the design from the poster. But it kind of looks like the Mockingjay is going down in flames. And we know that Katniss is seen as the Mockingjay.

39. Light up your room with this Hunger Games light bulb.

Really? A Hunger Games light bulb? You're shitting me. Seriously, I'm just wondering how anyone could think of this. Said to cost $15 on Amazon by the way.

Really? A Hunger Games light bulb? You’re shitting me. Seriously, I’m just wondering how anyone could think of this. Said to cost $15 on Amazon by the way.

40. For those who love the Hunger Games, you’ll sure look stunning with Nightlock jewelry.

Because nothing says true love than hoisting these poison berries to you and your boyfriend's mouths and threatening a joint suicide. Didn't see a romanticization of suicide since Romeo and Juliet.

Because nothing says true love than hoisting these poison berries to you and your boyfriend’s mouths and threatening a joint suicide. Didn’t see such a romanticization of teen suicide since Romeo and Juliet.

41. Support the Hunger Games by wearing a pin volunteering your brother as a tribute.

From Entertainment Weekly: "This “I Volunteer My Brother as Tribute” pin makes it clear that you’d sacrifice your brother to avoid having to compete in the Hunger Games yourself." Still, I don't think volunteering works that way.

From Entertainment Weekly: “This “I Volunteer My Brother as Tribute” pin makes it clear that you’d sacrifice your brother to avoid having to compete in the Hunger Games yourself.” Still, I don’t think volunteering works that way.

42. If you’ve been stunned by a tracker jacker, try some antivenom.

Still, I think it might just be body wash. Still, if you're aware tracker jacker stings can cause brain washing, hallucinations, and/or death. Requires immediate treatment with a special kind of leaves.

Still, I think it might just be body wash. Still, if you’re aware tracker jacker stings can cause brain washing, powerful hallucinations, and/or death. Requires immediate treatment with a special kind of leaves.

43. If you like the smell of berries, try some Essence of Nightlock.

For God's sake what's with the Nightlock stuff? Do they have any idea they're poisonous berries Katniss threatened to do a joint suicide with? Seriously, why?

For God’s sake what’s with the Nightlock stuff? Do they have any idea they’re poisonous berries Katniss threatened to do a joint suicide with? Seriously, why?

44. Got chapped lips? Then keep them moist with Catching Fire Red lip gloss.

I think if you're trying to survive the Hunger Games, chapped lips are the last thing you'll probably worry about. Also, you won't use the whole tube anyway.

I think if you’re trying to survive the Hunger Games, chapped lips are the last thing you’ll probably worry about. Also, you won’t use the whole tube anyway.

45. Care for your future peacekeeper with this peacekeeper cadet burp blanket.

Of course, all peacekeepers start out as babies. But seriously, their main job is to maintain law and order and suppress dissent through coercion and brutality.

Of course, all peacekeepers start out as babies. But seriously, their main job is to maintain law and order and suppress dissent through coercion and brutality.

46. For your hunger needs at school, you can always get a Hunger Games lunch box.

Yeah, nothing like a way to honor a series about post-apocalyptic starvation than a thing you put food in. Of course, don't know if that's appropriate for kids in elementary school.

Yeah, nothing like a way to honor a series about post-apocalyptic starvation than a thing you put food in. Of course, don’t know if that’s appropriate for kids in elementary school.

47. With this burp cloth, remember that the odds were never in your baby’s favor.

Well, as far as the Hunger Games is concerned, at least this is honest. But as to why they have Hunger Games baby products, I don't have the slightest idea.

Well, as far as the Hunger Games is concerned, at least this is honest. But as to why they have Hunger Games baby products, I don’t have the slightest idea.

48. May the odds be ever in your favor with this silver parachute necklace.

Yes, this is another silver parachute necklace. But this one also has little compartments. But if you're familiar with the books, it's kind of a macabre piece of jewelry.

Yes, this is another silver parachute necklace. But this one also has little compartments. But if you’re familiar with the books, it’s kind of a macabre piece of jewelry.

49. Celebrate the Hunger Games with your very own Catching Fire chocolate bars.

Hope they're not like the assorted chocolates you eat from a fancy box. Wait a minute, this is promote a movie that deals with post-apocalyptic starvation. Why the hell do they have this?

Hope they’re not like the assorted chocolates you eat from a fancy box. Wait a minute, this is promote a movie that deals with post-apocalyptic starvation. Why the hell do they have this?

50. Create your own Hunger Games story with this magnetic story kit.

Said to contain 250 words only to create quotes from the movies said by Peeta and Katniss. Why they thought this was a good idea, I'll never know.

Said to contain 250 words only to create quotes from the movies said by Peeta and Katniss. Why they thought this was a good idea, I’ll never know.

51. For those who like Peeta, cuddle up with this Peeta pillow case.

Doesn't mean you might fantasize cuddling with Peeta, doesn't mean that a pillow case in his likeness is a good idea. Just saying.

Doesn’t mean you might fantasize cuddling with Peeta, doesn’t mean that a pillow case in his likeness is a good idea. Just saying.

52. Like Katniss, you too, can now have an orange Hunger Games backpack.

From You're Killing Us: "It’s orange, just like Katniss’! Remember how Katniss’ backpack was orange, so people in the arena would be better able to see her in the woods so that they could kill her? Awesome!"

From You’re Killing Us: “It’s orange, just like Katniss’! Remember how Katniss’ backpack was orange, so people in the arena would be better able to see her in the woods so that they could kill her? Awesome!”

53. Toast the Hunger Games with your very own Mockingjay beer stein.

I can totally imagine Haymitch drinking from this. However, I don't think he'd be drinking beer or just beer in that though.

I can totally imagine Haymitch drinking from this. However, I don’t think he’d be drinking beer or just beer in that though.

54. Cuddle up with Peeta with your very own Peeta polar fleece.

Would go nicely with that Peeta pillow case. But really, why have Peeta merchandise when you can get Katniss?

Would go nicely with that Peeta pillow case. But really, why have Peeta merchandise when you can get Katniss?

55. Make your eyes look stunning with these Effie Trinket eyelashes.

So they actually have these. Still, wouldn't want to wear them during a job interview. The HR might think you're tripping.

So they actually have these. Still, wouldn’t want to wear them during a job interview. The HR might think you’re tripping.

56. Wake up in the morning with a Hunger Games whistle mug.

From Virgin Media: "The musical notation version of Rue’s iconic whistle from the films, which means that there are literally about three people in the world who will see, recognize and enjoy this very niche product."

From Virgin Media: “The musical notation version of Rue’s iconic whistle from the films, which means that there are literally about three people in the world who will see, recognize and enjoy this very niche product.”

57. If it’s your thing you can go with some Tracker Jacker Venom.

To be fair, this is soap. But still, tracker jacker venom was what the Capitol used to hijack Peeta's mind so they could use him to kill Katniss. Think about it.

To be fair, this is soap. But still, tracker jacker venom was what the Capitol used to hijack Peeta’s mind so they could use him to kill Katniss. Think about it.

58. Show your love for the Hunger Games with your very own Mockingjay votive candle holder.

Wonder how anyone thought this was a good idea? Guess they thought a shadow mockingjay logo looked cool.

Wonder how anyone thought this was a good idea? Guess they thought a shadow mockingjay logo looked cool.

59. Sleep soundly with your very own District 12 bead spread.

From Zimbio: "You'll sleep soundly every night knowing that Peeta and Katniss are there to protect you. This Hunger Games bedspread is also a total chick magnet, so... win/win." I'm not so sure about that.

From Zimbio: “You’ll sleep soundly every night knowing that Peeta and Katniss are there to protect you. This Hunger Games bedspread is also a total chick magnet, so… win/win.” I’m not so sure about that.

60. Stay dry with your very own flaming Mockingjay umbrella.

From Zimbio: "While the kids in the Hunger Games have to worry about their friends murdering them, real world concerns like inclement weather are much less troubling. And although there's no death protection for the tributes, there is this flaming Mockingjay umbrella to help all of us stay dry."

From Zimbio: “While the kids in the Hunger Games have to worry about their friends murdering them, real world concerns like inclement weather are much less troubling. And although there’s no death protection for the tributes, there is this flaming Mockingjay umbrella to help all of us stay dry.”

May the Odds Be Ever in Your Favor Dressed in These Wonderful Hunger Games Costumes

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

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Now that Halloween is over, I can go back to business as usual. So until Christmas comes around, no more posts about costumes, treats, crafts, or other stuff associated with special occasions. Okay, I’m wrong. Because during the next two months, two major science fiction franchises will dominate the big screen once again. One is an epic ground breaking franchise that changed the reputation of visual effects and science fiction movies in general as well as entertained generations for nearly 40 years. The other is based on a trilogy of young adult novels that were released less than 10 years ago. One is said to be a ripoff from a Japanese movie while the other actually is that even the creator admits it. One franchise will have its next installment after years of mediocre prequels and will unite 3 members of the original cast. The other will release its final installment based on the second part of the last novel. One takes place a long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. The other takes place in a dystopian post-apocalyptic society in North America. One franchise involves a rebellion fighting against an evil empire in the midst of outer space and involves droids, jedi, aliens, and intergalactic battles. The other revolves around a rich capital exploiting its districts of resources and retaining control of them by forcing 24 teenagers from these districts in an annual fight to the death on live television. Still, they both involve headstrong heroines in mortal peril having to choose between a scruffy looking, dark, and handsome nerfherder who gets tortured/frozen and a sweet but seemingly wimpy light haired guy who’s not as lame or defenseless as he looks. But only one of these franchises involves a moment of incest. So to celebrate both movie franchise premieres, I have decided to attract both fan bases with my posts for Nerdvember.

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Since Mockingjay Part 2 will be released in theaters on November 20th while Star Wars: The Force Awakens won’t come out until December 18th, I might as well start with The Hunger Games first. Now for those who are unfamiliar with the books or the movies, let me explain. It’s based on a trilogy of young adult novels by Suzanne Collins. The story takes place on a dystopian post-apocalyptic society in North America called Panem with a rich and technologically advanced Capitol exploiting resources from 12 districts to varying levels of poverty that it controls with iron rule. And in order to show who’s in charge, the Capitol punishes these 12 districts for a past rebellion by selecting 2 kids in each district between the ages of 12-18 to battle in a fight to the death on live television everyone’s forced to watch. Our protagonist 16-year-old Katniss Everdeen is from District 12, the poorest of these districts and and has lived in dire poverty since her father died in a mining explosion when she was 11. But unlike most Hunger Games tributes in her district, she volunteers so her 12 year old sister, Prim won’t have to go (her name was picked on the Reaping Day lottery for the girls). However, at the same time, her fellow District 12 tribute, Peeta Mellark has been in love with her since they were kids, though Katniss didn’t take notice until he admitted it on national television (though I have to admit, Peeta’s actions aren’t as dumb as they seem). Themes consist of socio-economic inequality, media manipulation, government corruption and incompetence, lack of agency, violence as entertainment, war, exploitation, imperialism, and bread and circus style politics. And despite the books being catered to kids as young as 11-13, they contain elements like public nudity, decapitation, suicide, torture, mutilation, child prostitution, being buried alive, and other psychologically and emotionally disturbing content. I am not kidding about this. Seriously, read the books and/or watch the movies to see for yourselves. So let’s just say this isn’t a family friendly franchise we’re talking about here. So if you have children under 11 or children under 13 who haven’t read the books, you might want to have them watch Star Wars instead.

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Now as you might see from this glorious picture of Jennifer Lawrence from Catching Fire or almost anything Effie Trinket wears, a significant chunk of the series revolves around fashion. Of course, the poorer districts don’t get a lot of elaborate outfits. But once you get to the Capitol, yeah, you see all kinds of wild and crazy outfits that you’d think you were in the middle of a Lady Gaga music video. Katniss and her fellow tributes themselves even have their own fashion designer and stylists once in the Capitol so they can look pretty on the cameras for interviews. This comes especially for Katniss and tributes from the poorer districts since they basically don’t have the time to worry about their looks or basic hygiene in that matter. Yeah, they have much bigger things to worry about like eating and other basic needs. And yes, tributes do get put in a lot of ridiculous outfits as you might see. Still, the Hunger Games does have its share of fans dressing up as various characters for nerd conventions, Halloween, or their movie premieres. For girls Katniss Everdeen and Effie Trinket are usually popular choices while Ceasar Flickerman and Seneca Crane are the ones I most often see for guys. So for this post I decided to feature costumes from the movies but worn by the fans. Many of these will be DIY just because it more or less shows the creative spirit. So without further adieu, I present a treasury of Hunger Games fans in their costumes. And may the odds be ever in your favor.

  1. In Panem, you always need Peacekeepers to tame the masses, especially at Comic Con.
Now Peacekeepers are the Hunger Games equivalent to Imperial Stormtroopers. Yet, their main function is maintaining order and suppress dissidence through coercion and brutality.

Now Peacekeepers are the Hunger Games equivalent to Imperial Stormtroopers. Yet, their main function is maintaining order and suppress dissidence through coercion and brutality.

2. Now you can dress up like Katniss Everdeen as the Mockingjay.

Of course, this might mean being a figurehead for the Rebellion headed by someone who doesn't really like you. But still, the outfit is badass.

Of course, this might mean being a figurehead for the Rebellion headed by someone who doesn’t really like you. But still, the outfit is badass.

3. If you have two daughters, remember that it doesn’t cost a lot of money to dress them as the Everdeen sisters.

I'm sure Katniss's parents didn't buy most of her costume, especially the bow and ripped up pants. Still, that's an adorable picture.

I’m sure Katniss’s parents didn’t buy most of her costume, especially the bow and ripped up pants. Still, that’s an adorable picture.

4. Remember, it’s never too early to give your daughter archery lessons.

Now this is an adorable Katniss costume, which seems like an easy costume to make. Still, while Katniss Everdeen is a great role model for girls, I'm not sure if she makes a great toddler costume.

Now this is an adorable Katniss costume, which seems like an easy costume to make. Still, while Katniss Everdeen is a great role model for girls, I’m not sure if she makes a great toddler costume.

5. Now Effie Trinket just has to look her best on Reaping Day.

Now you'll see a lot of Effie Trinket in this post for obvious reasons. And yes, it's probably just as fun of a costume to make.

Now you’ll see a lot of Effie Trinket in this post for obvious reasons. And yes, it’s probably just as fun of a costume to make.

6. Hey, I didn’t know that Effie and Haymitch were a couple.

I'm sure Haymitch didn't spend much time or money on his costume, save maybe for the wig. Still, the glass is appropriate since the guy is an alcoholic.

I’m sure Haymitch didn’t spend much time or money on his costume, save maybe for the wig. Still, the glass is appropriate since the guy is an alcoholic. But you can’t blame him.

7. Be the “Girl on Fire” with this Katniss Everdeen costume.

Now this costume is from the first movie. But for safety's sake she had to use a cape of orange cloth and Christmas lights.

Now this costume is from the first movie. But for safety’s sake she had to use a cape of orange cloth and Christmas lights.

8. Of course, if you’re a guy who likes the Hunger Games but don’t want to dress in drag, you can always go as Caesar Flickerman.

Now Caesar Flickerman is a talk show host for the Hunger Game who's played by Stanley Tucci. Of course, he's best known for his blue wig and dazzling smile.

Now Caesar Flickerman is a talk show host for the Hunger Game who’s played by Stanley Tucci. Of course, he’s best known for his blue wig and dazzling smile.

9. Of course, you can make an Effie Trinket costume from just about anything, even newspapers.

Let's just say this would be Effie Trinket if she were promoting an environmental message. Well, if she wasn't too busy selecting tributes for Reaping Day and prepping them for a televised teenage death match.

Let’s just say this would be Effie Trinket if she were promoting an environmental message. Well, if she wasn’t too busy selecting tributes for Reaping Day and prepping them for a televised teenage death match.

10. Of course, a shiny blue dress and green wig will make the perfect Effie Trinket costume.

Of course, you might notice that Effie Trinket is a popular costume. Yeah, as long as you have a puffy silk dress and a funky wig, then you can have your own Effie Trinket costume.

Of course, you might notice that Effie Trinket is a popular costume. Yeah, as long as you have a puffy silk dress and a funky wig, then you can have your own Effie Trinket costume.

11. If you survive the Hunger Games, you’re bound to end up with some scrapes and bruises.

However, all this isn't nearly as bad as the lifetime of PTSD that you'd be dealing with. By the way, this is supposed to be Katniss.

However, all this isn’t nearly as bad as the lifetime of PTSD that you’d be dealing with. By the way, this is supposed to be Katniss.

12. Who knew that Effie Trinket could look so good in pink?

Guess Effie Trinket from the Hunger Games has given a new life to 1980s prom dresses everywhere. Let's just say if you want to dress up as her, it's best to go DIY.

Guess Effie Trinket from the Hunger Games has given a new life to 1980s prom dresses everywhere. Let’s just say if you want to dress up as her, it’s best to go DIY.

13. Who says that Hunger Games cosplay should just be reserved for humans?

Of course, I'm positive that this canine Katniss doesn't need arrows to kill squirrels. It's has stuff to do so like teeth.

Of course, I’m positive that this canine Katniss doesn’t need arrows to kill squirrels. It’s has stuff to do so like teeth.

14. Effie Trinket or Jean Harlow?

Now this is another incarnation of Effie Trinket. But your grandparents might think it's the 1930s platinum blond bombshell who died at 26.

Now this is another incarnation of Effie Trinket. But your grandparents might think it’s the 1930s platinum blond bombshell who died at 26 of kidney failure.

15. Not sure if Effie’s going to tolerate Haymitch’s drinking at this party.

Still, you can't blame Haymitch Abernathy for being alcoholic since he's the last guy from District 12 to win the Hunger Games prior to Katniss and Peeta. You can guess what he had to deal with.

Still, you can’t blame Haymitch Abernathy for being alcoholic since he’s the last guy from District 12 to win the Hunger Games prior to Katniss and Peeta. You can guess what he had to deal with.

16. Just a couple of Peacekeepers patrolling the area. Nothing to see here.

Now these guys certainly made their own costume as you can tell by the batting helmets and football shoulder pads. Doesn't hurt that they have toy police stuff, too.

Now these guys certainly made their own costume as you can tell by the batting helmets and football shoulder pads. Doesn’t hurt that they have toy police stuff, too.

17. Guess this is a group picture of Katniss with the Capitol prep team.

Weird to see Cinna without gold mascara. Not sure if the Asian girl in the dress is supposed to be Effie though. Still, you can see how fun it is to dress up as someone from the Capitol.

Weird to see Cinna without gold mascara. Not sure if the Asian girl in the dress is supposed to be Effie though. Still, you can see how fun it is to dress up as someone from the Capitol.

18. Is it just me or am I seeing 3 Katniss Everdeens in this one?

I'd watch where they put the arrows if I were a couple of those girls. You never know where you might shoot somebody's eye out.

I’d watch where they put the arrows if I were a couple of those girls. You never know where you might shoot somebody’s eye out.

19. Which will she choose her hunting buddy or the boy with bread?

Of course, you have to like Peeta's costume in this as well as his death glare to Gale. Yeah, the baker's boy isn't as docile as he looks.

Of course, you have to like Peeta’s costume in this as well as his death glare to Gale. Yeah, the baker’s boy isn’t as docile as he looks.

20. As we all know, Katniss Everdeen is the Mockingjay.

And if you're familiar with the events of Catching Fire, you should know that Cinna gets in big trouble for this outfit. Like getting brutally beaten as Katniss enters the Quarter Quell.

And if you’re familiar with the events of Catching Fire, you should know that Cinna gets in big trouble for this outfit. Like getting brutally beaten as Katniss enters the Quarter Quell.

21. When you’re dressed up as Finnick Odair, make sure you have plenty of net.

Finnick Odair appears in Catching Fire as a victor from District 4, which specializes in fishing. Still, he's not a popular costume due to dress code rules like no shirt, no shoes, no service.

Finnick Odair appears in Catching Fire as a victor from District 4, which specializes in fishing. Still, he’s not a popular costume due to dress code rules like no shirt, no shoes, no service.

22. Even girls can dress up as Effie trinket if there’s a white wig involved.

Now that's an adorable costume. Still, I'm sure it didn't cost much to make assuming that she had that outfit to begin with.

Now that’s an adorable costume. Still, I’m sure it didn’t cost much to make assuming that she had that outfit to begin with.

23. If you’re going as Caesar Flickerman, make sure your hair matches your suit.

Now the hair may not have the character. But the glittery suit definitely makes the costume in this case.

Now the hair may not have the character. But the glittery suit definitely makes the costume in this case.

24. Of course, only in the Hunger Games are the more outlandish fashions behind the scenes.

Of course, one of Katniss's prep team members has her skin dyed green. It's not evident in the movies. Still, you have to admit that Seneca Crane does have an awesome beard.

Of course, one of Katniss’s prep team members has her skin dyed green. It’s not evident in the movies. Still, you have to admit that Seneca Crane does have an awesome beard.

25. If you’re a blond guy and your girlfriend’s Katniss, make sure you two are wearing matching windbreakers.

Of course, Katniss is wondering why Peeta isn't wearing a backpack. Still, if you're from the same district, it pays to match.

Of course, Katniss is wondering why Peeta isn’t wearing a backpack. Still, if you’re from the same district, it pays to match.

26. As doggie Effie Trinket says, “May the paws be ever in your favor.”

Still, I don't think Effie wears the Mockingjay pin as I remember. But yeah, that's sure in the real Effie Trinket spirit.

Still, I don’t think Effie wears the Mockingjay pin as I remember. But yeah, that’s sure in the real Effie Trinket spirit.

27. Even in drab, Effie Trinket is still a fun costume.

Just have some old denim clothes and you're all set. Still, in the books, remember that Effie Trinket doesn't defect to District 13, at least in the beginning.

Just have some old denim clothes and you’re all set. Still, in the books, remember that Effie Trinket doesn’t defect to District 13, at least in the beginning.

28. If you want to dress as Katniss, it help if you have a fire dress.

Of course, it's hard to tell which dress she's wearing since she had a few outfits that caught fire. Then again, it might be the wedding dress.

Of course, it’s hard to tell which dress she’s wearing since she had a few outfits that caught fire. Then again, it might be the wedding dress.

29. If you’re Effie Trinket, you can’t have enough butterflies on your dress or hair.

This is modest than what Effie wore in the movie. But it's still quite clever to say the least.

This is modest than what Effie wore in the movie. But it’s still quite clever to say the least.

30. Of course, it’s hard to create your own Katniss wedding dress.

Let's hope this isn't a Hunger Games themed wedding picture. Seriously, I may like the books, but I don't think a Hunger Games wedding is appropriate at all.

Let’s hope this isn’t a Hunger Games themed wedding picture. Seriously, I may like the books, but I don’t think a Hunger Games wedding is appropriate at all.

31. Of course, you can’t rock as Effie Trinket without orange and black.

From what they said about this picture, the woman dressed as Effie is supposed to be a school principal. Let's hope it's for a high school, shall we?

From what they said about this picture, the woman dressed as Effie is supposed to be a school principal. Let’s hope it’s for a high school, shall we?

32. Let’s have some tea and a chat for President Snow.

For those planning on dressing up as President Snow for the Hunger Games movie: You'll probably have no trouble looking for Santa Claus beards this time of year. Still, they don't call Snow "Evil Santa" for nothing.

For those planning on dressing up as President Snow for the Hunger Games movie: You’ll probably have no trouble looking for Santa Claus beards this time of year. Still, they don’t call Snow “Evil Santa” for nothing.

33. Over in the playpen, let’s turn to our very own Caesar Flickerman.

Now that's so adorable. You have to love this costume for God's sake, especially the blue hair.

Now that’s so adorable. You have to love this costume for God’s sake, especially the blue hair and fake microphone.

34. Did I tell you that Effie Trinket really likes Monarch Butterflies?

Now that's a butterfly dress I'm talking about. Well, at least in Effie Trinket's case. Chances are it took a long time to make this costume.

Now that’s a butterfly dress I’m talking about. Well, at least in Effie Trinket’s case. Chances are it took a long time to make this costume.

35. Just because she’s dressed in fishnet stockings doesn’t mean she’s a hooker. She could just be dressing as Effie Trinket.

For some reason, I don't see Effie Trinket in fishnets as very surprising. In fact, I don't think it's a surprise to see her in anything.

For some reason, I don’t see Effie Trinket in fishnets as very surprising. In fact, I don’t think it’s a surprise to see her in anything.

36. When you’re Effie Trinket, always make sure the right dress goes with the right hair.

And I'm sure Effie has plenty of wigs for all the dresses she wears. Yeah, it's kind of a thing at the Capitol. Don't ask.

And I’m sure Effie has plenty of wigs for all the dresses she wears. Yeah, it’s kind of a thing at the Capitol. Don’t ask.

37. Of course, all the Effie Trinkets will have to wait in line.

Caption: "Members of the public turn up at London's Marylebone Station dressed as Effie Trinket as part of 'The Hunger Games: Catching Fire' Capitol Costume Competition in which the winner gets to attend the 'Mokingjay: Part 1' premiere."

Caption: “Members of the public turn up at London’s Marylebone Station dressed as Effie Trinket as part of ‘The Hunger Games: Catching Fire’ Capitol Costume Competition in which the winner gets to attend the ‘Mokingjay: Part 1’ premiere.”

38. When you’re Effie Trinket, it helps that your hair matches your outfit.

So I guess Effie's at some sort of tea social. Wonder what she'll talk about there. Still, very clever.

So I guess Effie’s at some sort of tea social. Wonder what she’ll talk about there. Still, very clever.

39. Of course, to Effie Trinket, this is business casual.

Yeah, she tend to dress way more elaborately than that. Trust me. This is quite toned down, but not that much.

Yeah, she tend to dress way more elaborately than that. Trust me. This is quite toned down, but not that much.

40. Remember if you’re in the Hunger Games, it pays not the mess with Katniss.

That doesn't mean you won't be killed though. Because we all know the Hunger Games is a fight to the death.

That doesn’t mean you won’t be killed though. Because we all know that in the Hunger Games, the competition is deadly, literally.

41. As long as it looks like flame, you’re good to go with “Girl on Fire.”

Now this is a very cool Katniss costume. Love the flame cape here. Not realistic, but what can you do.

Now this is a very cool Katniss costume. Love the flame cape here. Not realistic, but what can you do.

42. If you have an afro wig, it helps that you dress up as Rue.

In the story, Rue is a tribute from District 11 who befriends Katniss. She's about 12. Still, she doesn't last.

In the story, Rue is a tribute from District 11 who befriends Katniss. She’s about 12. Still, she doesn’t last.

43. When it comes to baby costumes, it’s easy to dress as Finnick.

He may not have a 6 pack but he's certainly adorable. Just watch that he doesn't hurt anybody with the trident.

He may not have a 6 pack but he’s certainly adorable. Just watch that he doesn’t hurt anybody with the trident.

44. Of course, you don’t want to steal baby Katniss’s rattle.

Not sure if I'd trust a baby with a bow and arrow. But you have to admit, this costume is adorable.

Not sure if I’d trust a baby with a bow and arrow. But you have to admit, this costume is adorable.

45. As we all know, the family that does the Hunger Games together, stays together.

You can see this is a mostly boys group here. Not sure what the person in red supposed to be. Johanna? An Avox? One of Katniss's prep team?

You can see this is a mostly boys group here. Not sure what the person in red supposed to be. Johanna? An Avox? One of Katniss’s prep team?

46. Yes, Peeta, rest your weary head on Katniss’s flaming dress.

Of course, that's not real fire. But still, the idea of Peeta resting on a flaming dress kind of makes me uncomfortable.

Of course, that’s not real fire. But still, the idea of Peeta resting on a flaming dress kind of makes me uncomfortable.

47. We all know how Effie Trinket tends to glimmer in gold.

Not sure if Effie Trinket wore such outfit in the movie. But I wouldn't be surprised if she has something like this in her wardrobe.

Not sure if Effie Trinket wore such outfit in the movie. But I wouldn’t be surprised if she has something like this in her wardrobe.

48. When it comes to seeing the Hunger Games, make it a family affair.

Actually don't unless your kids have read the books. Still, you have to love the parents' costumes in this one.

Actually don’t unless your kids have read the books. Still, you have to love the parents’ costumes in this one.

49. When it comes to being the “Girl on Fire” using Christmas lights helps.

Now this looks quite cool as I do say so myself. If you're not familiar with The Hunger Games, you wouldn't get this.

Now this looks quite cool as I do say so myself. If you’re not familiar with The Hunger Games, you wouldn’t get this.

50. Don’t know about you, but it seems that Katniss is a bit creeped out about Seneca Crane and Effie Trinket.

Still, while Seneca Crane doesn't play a big role in the boos, he's loved by the fans nevertheless. Probably because of his beard.

Still, while Seneca Crane doesn’t play a big role in the boos, he’s loved by the fans nevertheless. Probably because of his beard.

51. Who says you can’t wear a wedding dress more than once?

Well, Katniss's wedding dress didn't really have a veil. But still, now that she's made it look like it's burning, she's bound to wear this for many occasions.

Well, Katniss’s wedding dress didn’t really have a veil. But still, now that she’s made it look like it’s burning, she’s bound to wear this for many occasions.

52. You wouldn’t know this but Seneca Crane is said to be a hit with the ladies.

Enjoy being a chick magnet while it lasts, Seneca. Because I'm positive that you won't last beyond the first book. Awesome beard or not.

Enjoy being a chick magnet while it lasts, Seneca. Because I’m positive that you won’t last beyond the first book. Awesome beard or not.

53. Seems like Effie Trinket is in her Sunday best.

Yes, that's Effie Trinket. But still, a bit more toned down than other examples. Yet, I'm sure the pattern does make my eyes sore.

Yes, that’s Effie Trinket. But still, a bit more toned down than other examples. Yet, I’m sure the pattern does make my eyes sore.

54. Like Katniss, a girl’s best friend is her bow.

And by "bow" I mean the one you shoot arrows with to hunt critters or tributes. Katniss knows her way around with that.

And by “bow” I mean the one you shoot arrows with to hunt critters or tributes. Katniss knows her way around with that.

55. Now Effie Trinket has a large closet. But she’s in the mood for blue today.

Yeah, I know I've been showing a lot of Effie Trinket lately. But still she has a lot of outfits and looks as you can see.

Yeah, I know I’ve been showing a lot of Effie Trinket lately. But still she has a lot of outfits and looks as you can see.

56. From District 7 for the Quarter Quell, you have Joanna Mason.

Like Finnick, Johanna first appears in Catching Fire. Her district specializes in lumber. Still, she does make quite an entrance in her intro.

Like Finnick, Johanna first appears in Catching Fire. Her district specializes in lumber. Still, she does make quite an entrance in her intro.

57. Looks a bit short for a Katniss wedding dress, doesn’t it?

Then again, perhaps a tutu is all you need in this situation. Or all you can afford. Still, pretty though.

Then again, perhaps a tutu is all you need in this situation. Or all you can afford. Still, pretty though.

58. With a Katniss wedding dress, you can’t have enough feathers.

Now that's probably the closest I've seen to pertaining to Katniss's wedding dress in the movie. Still, very beautiful though.

Now that’s probably the closest I’ve seen to pertaining to Katniss’s wedding dress in the movie. Still, very beautiful though.

59. Looks like this little Peeta Mellark loves to smile as much as baking bread.

Of course, you can tell it's Peeta because he's a boy and his shirt says "12." Other than that, he might as well be from a different district.

Of course, you can tell it’s Peeta because he’s a boy and his shirt says “12.” Other than that, he might as well be from a different district.

60. Seems like it’s just another day at the Capitol.

And it seems like President Snow had to put in the least amount of effort in his costume. I mean that white beard looks totally real.

And it seems like President Snow had to put in the least amount of effort in his costume. I mean that white beard looks totally real.

61. Here we come to Seneca Crane about to hail a cab.

Yes, Head Gamemaker Seneca Crane has an awesome beard. Unfortunately, that doesn't help him in his situation.

Yes, Head Gamemaker Seneca Crane has an awesome beard. Unfortunately, that doesn’t help him in his situation.

62. Remember to spread your wings like the Mockingjay.

Man, those are very big wings. Must take a lot of feathers. Hope a condor didn't get killed to make that costume. Because it's an endangered species.

Man, those are very big wings. Must take a lot of feathers. Hope a condor didn’t get killed to make that costume. Because it’s an endangered species.

63. In tribute parades, they always make sure the girl and the boy from each district have matching outfits.

Now this is supposed to be Katniss and Peeta from the tribute parade in the first movie. Yeah, the flames really don't look real in this.

Now this is supposed to be Katniss and Peeta from the tribute parade in the first movie. Yeah, the flames really don’t look real in this.

64. For anyone dressing as Peeta, it always helps if your suit has flames.

I don't know about you. But this looks less like Peeta the "Boy with Bread" and more like Peeta the Used Car Salesman. Not sure why.

I don’t know about you. But this looks less like Peeta the “Boy with Bread” and more like Peeta the Used Car Salesman. Not sure why.

65. Of course, you can’t have enough ruffles if you’re Effie Trinket.

No, that's not someone you'd see in Whoville. That's supposed to be Effie Trinket. But yeah, she does dress like that.

No, that’s not someone you’d see in Whoville. That’s supposed to be Effie Trinket. But yeah, she does dress like that.

66. If you’re dressed as Prim, chances are you’ll have a rather easy costume.

All that's required are a skirt, white shirt, pigtails, shoes, and not much else. You can get most of that stuff anywhere.

All that’s required are a skirt, white shirt, pigtails, shoes, and not much else. You can get most of that stuff anywhere.

67. If you like red, then a “girl on fire” dress might be your best bet.

Now Katniss wore the red dress in the first movie. But like the one in the second one, it did catch fire. Yet, it did not transform.

Now Katniss wore the red dress in the first movie. But like the one in the second one, it did catch fire. Yet, it did not transform.

68. For the Quarter Quell tribute parade, you might want to go with a sleek evening dress.

Like the outfit from the first movie, this one, too caught on fire. Still, not sure if I like this outfit better.

Like the outfit from the first movie, this one, too caught on fire. Still, not sure if I like this outfit better.

69. Guess the critters better hide, Katniss is out hunting.

Technically Katniss is poaching for rodents. But since District 12 is so poor, the laws aren't enforced as much. Well, at least at first.

Technically Katniss is poaching for rodents. But since District 12 is so poor, the laws aren’t enforced as much. Well, at least at first.

70. What do you mean you can’t shoot arrows in a red dress?

Of course, Katniss didn't shoot any arrows in a red dress. Well, as far as I know. But it's nice to imagine.

Of course, Katniss didn’t shoot any arrows in a red dress. Well, as far as I know. But it’s nice to imagine.

71. Take a tip from Katniss and don’t shoot arrows until you see the whites of their eyes.

Now this is her wearing a wetsuit from Catching Fire. Yeah, kind of looks dumb but they were aiming for practicality there.

Now this is her wearing a wetsuit from Catching Fire. Yeah, kind of looks dumb but they were aiming for practicality there.

72. Looks like Peeta isn’t too scared being alone in the woods.

Still, Peeta's not as much adept to wilderness survival as Katniss. But his main strength has more to do with PR.

Still, Peeta’s not as much adept to wilderness survival as Katniss. But his main strength has more to do with PR.

73. Yes, I’m sure these people have come with some police escort.

Yes, they're dressed like you'd see people in the Capitol. And yes, they look ridiculous. But that's kind of the point.

Yes, they’re dressed like you’d see people in the Capitol. And yes, they look ridiculous. But that’s kind of the point.

74. Who knew Caesar Flickerman didn’t just wear blue?

Now this is what Caesar Flickerman looked like in Catching Fire. Yes, he's wearing black and his wig is lavender.

Now this is what Caesar Flickerman looked like in Catching Fire. Yes, he’s wearing black and his wig is lavender.

75. Let’s just say you don’t want to get Katniss angry.

Of course, they don't call her "the Girl on Fire" for nothing. And yes, she can kill if she has to. I mean she did survive the Hunger Games.

Of course, they don’t call her “the Girl on Fire” for nothing. And yes, she can kill if she has to. I mean she did survive the Hunger Games.

76. Of course, it’s said the Katniss looks quite nice in red and black.

This might be the only Katniss outfit I haven't shown this far. Still, don't really know what to think of it.

This might be the only Katniss outfit I haven’t shown this far. Still, don’t really know what to think of it.

77. If you’re the Mockingjay, it’s best that you flaunt your wings.

Except if you're in the Capitol during the rebellion. In that case, you better be igcognito and remain so.

Except if you’re in the Capitol during the rebellion. In that case, you better be igcognito and remain so.

78. Seems like Katniss and Peeta are taking a rest.

Well, they better not rest long. Because you know, everyone is basically trying to kill them.

Well, they better not rest long. Because you know, everyone is basically trying to kill them.

79. Of course, you never know what Effie Trinket is going to wear next.

Now while I may think this look might be ridiculous to normal eyes, Effie might thing it's great. Of course, Capitol fashion can be weird like that.

Now while I may think this look might be ridiculous to normal eyes, Effie might thing it’s great. Of course, Capitol fashion can be weird like that.

80. As you might know, you can tell that Katniss and Peeta make a cheap couples costume.

Now when Katniss and her family were starving, it was Peeta who gave her a loaf of burnt bread that his family can't sell. Sure Peeta was better of than she was, but not that much.

Now when Katniss and her family were starving, it was Peeta who gave her a loaf of burnt bread that his family can’t sell. Sure Peeta was better of than she was, but not that much.

The Horrifically Ghastly World of Ugly Halloween Sweaters

Posted by historymaniacmegan on
Now I'm not wearing an ugly Halloween sweater here because I don't have one. However, I do have a Halloween pin so I decided to open the post with that. Of course, my mom had to be in the background when I took this picture. Damn it.

Now I’m not wearing an ugly Halloween sweater here because I don’t have one. However, I do have a Halloween pin so I decided to open the post with that. Of course, my mom had to be in the background when I took this picture. Damn it.

While ugly Christmas sweaters have become classic Christmas holiday attire, you can’t say the same about ugly Halloween sweaters (mostly because people wear costumes during this time of year). However, they also exist as well and well before I was born in fact, contrary to what you might see. Of course, you usually see them on school teachers, parents, and people who give out trick or treat candy if you’re a kid. If you’re an adult, you might see them worn by co-workers once you get closer to Halloween. But they do exist and you can buy them wherever you like. In fact, there are plenty of ugly holiday sweaters for any holiday you can imagine. Even Columbus Day, which I don’t even bother to celebrate since it glamorizes colonialism and exploitation of Native Americans and I’m too busy compiling blog posts for what really matters in October. Yes, I’m talking about Halloween. You know scary monsters, haunted houses, dressing up in costumes, parades, and trick-or-treating. All Columbus Day consists of is a free day off and advertisers trying to give you a reason to get off your ass and go shopping. And if I find that there are tacky Halloween sweaters out there, I’m going to do a post on it once I find plenty that I like. So for your reading pleasure, I present to you some ghastly Halloween sweaters you might see.

  1. Let’s start with some orange and beads.
Looks like something a kindergarten teacher would wear. Still, why does the ghost have spots? Oh, i'ts to make it sparkle. Right.

Looks like something a kindergarten teacher would wear. Still, why does the ghost have spots? Oh, it’s to make it sparkle. Right.

2. Of course, anything can spring out from a jack o’lantern if you keep your mind at it.

Seems like this design was made possible by embroidery clubs and LSD. Seriously, flowers don't spring up from jack o'lanterns. Nor do they have any potential to put flowers in.

Seems like this design was made possible by embroidery clubs and LSD. Seriously, flowers don’t spring up from jack o’lanterns. Nor do they have any potential to put flowers in.

3. On Halloween, it helps that you have jack o’lanterns in the pumpkin patch.

Still, that one jack o'lantern at the top doesn't seem to have much of a smile. Or at least a symmetrical one. Looks more like it's playing a harmonica.

Still, that one jack o’lantern at the top doesn’t seem to have much of a smile. Or at least a symmetrical one. Looks more like it’s playing a harmonica.

4.Halloween night is always the season for trick or treating.

For some reason I find the kid dressed as a ghost quite freaky. Maybe it's best not to show skin on that one. Still, like the spider web sleeves.

For some reason I find the kid dressed as a ghost quite freaky. Maybe it’s best not to show skin on that one. Still, like the spider web sleeves.

5. When it comes to night, you can make it either black or blue.

Let's just say I think the presence of cute teddy bears gives me the impression that this sweater wasn't made for men. Then again, I have seen men's clothing with teddy bears while I was working at Macy's. But still.

Let’s just say I think the presence of cute teddy bears gives me the impression that this sweater wasn’t made for men. Then again, I have seen men’s clothing with teddy bears while I was working at Macy’s. But still.

6. When it comes to sweater patterns, always go with candy corn, jack o’lanterns, bats, and black cats.

This one has the following but bats. But yes, it's quite tacky and might cause some degree of eye strain.

This one has the following but bats. But yes, it’s quite tacky and might cause some degree of eye strain.

7. You can’t have too many bats, whether skeletal or not.

Of course, seeing a bat's skeleton while it's in flight isn't a good sign. It might mean that a bat has just taking off after resting on an electric fence.

Of course, seeing a bat’s skeleton while it’s in flight isn’t a good sign. It might mean that a bat has just taking off after resting on an electric fence.

8. When it comes to Halloween, everyone always loves getting candy.

Yes, we all love Halloween candy. However, I did write a post that specified which candy trick or treaters don't want. And I included candy corn.

Yes, we all love Halloween candy. However, I did write a post that specified which candy trick or treaters don’t want. And I included candy corn.

9. You’d never know what you’d find while trick or treating on Halloween night.

Not sure if I want to check this house. Looks pretty rickety and I saw a couple of ghosts nearby.

Not sure if I want to check this house. Looks pretty rickety and I saw a couple of ghosts nearby.

10. Of course, on Halloween, it’s best you go with bright and bold colors.

Now this looks like one you'd see your elementary school teacher wearing. However, at least this one doesn't have any candy corn on it. But the witch looks blurry.

Now this looks like one you’d see your elementary school teacher wearing. However, at least this one doesn’t have any candy corn on it. But the witch looks blurry.

11. Traditional Halloween colors usually consist of orange, black, white, and yellow.

And this guy seems to wear this sweater in confidence despite it looking utterly ridiculous on him. Seriously, he's dressed like the neighbor you can't stand when you take your kids to his house for trick or treating.

And this guy seems to wear this sweater in confidence despite it looking utterly ridiculous on him. Seriously, he’s dressed like the neighbor you can’t stand when you take your kids to his house for trick or treating.

12. Nothing makes Halloween better than a sequin vest.

Okay, I'm not sure what to think about sequins in craft projects and decorations. However, this looks like the kind of Halloween vest you'd wear to a disco.

Okay, I’m not sure what to think about sequins in craft projects and decorations. However, this looks like the kind of Halloween vest you’d wear to a disco.

13. Looks like they’re are ghosts coming from that house.

Wonder if these two ghosts have any place to go. Also, there are jack o'lanterns in the pumpkin patch. And it seems that winter came early in this one.

Wonder if these two ghosts have any place to go. Also, there are jack o’lanterns in the pumpkin patch. And it seems that winter came early in this one.

14. If you want to be scary, go with a sweater with skulls.

Wonder what people would think about seeing someone in that one. Then again, it might creep some people out, especially if they're your grandparents.

Wonder what people would think about seeing someone in that one. Then again, it might creep some people out, especially if they’re your grandparents.

15. Nothing shimmers on Halloween more than rhinestone spiders.

If you go clubbing or to a rave, this might be the kind of sweater you'd want to go with on Halloween. Of course, this one is tacky as hell.

If you go clubbing or to a rave, this might be the kind of sweater you’d want to go with on Halloween. Of course, this one is tacky as hell.

16. Eeek! Orange spiders!

Yeah, a bright orange spider would creep me out, too. It's simply about as natural as a radioactive one that bit Peter Parker.

Yeah, a bright orange spider would creep me out, too. It’s simply about as natural as a radioactive one that bit Peter Parker.

17. You can make your own Halloween sweater by sewing pieces of cloth on it.

Yeah, definitely something you'd expect the kindergarten teacher to wear. Particularly the one from Recess who's probably on her way to the loony bin.

Yeah, definitely something you’d expect the kindergarten teacher to wear. Particularly the one from Recess who’s probably on her way to the loony bin.

18. You can make a Halloween vest from the leftover pieces you didn’t use for your Halloween patchwork quilt.

Now this looks like the outfit you'd expect your goofy, annoying neighbor to wear. You know, the one that reminds you of Ned Flanders.

Now this looks like the outfit you’d expect your goofy, annoying neighbor to wear. You know, the one that reminds you of Ned Flanders.

19. Of course, pumpkin doesn’t have to be the only squash on your sweater.

You can tell this is a Halloween sweater because it has black cats on it. If it didn't have black cats, it might as well be a Thanksgiving sweater.

You can tell this is a Halloween sweater because it has black cats on it. If it didn’t have black cats, it might as well be a Thanksgiving sweater.

20. Seems like the owl has to be beside the black cat.

And the cat seems to wear an orange witch's hat. But the owl doesn't look too happy. Also, the house doesn't look that haunted.

And the cat seems to wear an orange witch’s hat. But the owl doesn’t look too happy. Also, the house doesn’t look that haunted.

21. Don’t know if I like the look on that witch.

I mean her chin is about as long as her nose. And there's a ghost with a lock and chain.

I mean her chin is about as long as her nose. And there’s a ghost with a lock and chain.

22. Nothing is cuter for Halloween than a teddy bear in a jack o’lanter costume.

Actually, I think a real teddy bear dressed as a jack o'lantern would be cuter than this one. Why I didn't put one in my teddy bear post I have no idea.

Actually, I think a real teddy bear dressed as a jack o’lantern would be cuter than this one. Why I didn’t put one in my teddy bear post I have no idea.

23. Heard that candy corn makes great buttons for a cardigan.

Now this one definitely looks like it was made for a teacher. There's just something about it.

Now this one definitely looks like it was made for a teacher. There’s just something about it.

24. Beware of the ghosts in the house and the jack o’lanterns in the tree.

Is it just me or do those ghosts look a bit like Q-tips or sperm to me. Can't say which. Also, from the look of the full moon, I think Batman might be there soon.

Is it just me or do those ghosts look a bit like Q-tips or sperm to me. Can’t say which. Also, from the look of the full moon, I think Batman might be there soon.

25. Of course, you can’t go wrong with spiderwebs and jack o’lanterns.

Seems like this guy is embarrassed to wear this. But he can't get out of it because his mother made it for him.

Seems like this guy is embarrassed to wear this. But he can’t get out of it because his mother made it for him.

26. Skeletons can dance the whole night long if they want to.

Guess these skeletons really do give bones about break dancing. Hope nobody breaks anything.

Guess these skeletons really do give bones about break dancing. Hope nobody breaks anything.

27. You might’ve heard of a Halloween sweater. But how about a Halloween dress?

Now this doesn't look very flattering. Something about this tells me that this woman may be thinner than she looks. Not sure what.

Now this doesn’t look very flattering. Something about this tells me that this woman may be thinner than she looks. Not sure what.

28. Heard of a Halloween suit? Now you have.

Now this guy looks all covered in jack o'lanterns. Seems like this was made from some Halloween table cloth.

Now this guy looks all covered in jack o’lanterns. Seems like this was made from some Halloween table cloth.

29. Things are about to get funky at the witches’ meeting.

As if the dancing witches, houses and black cats can't make this cardigan tacky enough. It also has to be in candy corn colors. Kind of disgusting.

As if the dancing witches, houses and black cats can’t make this cardigan tacky enough. It also has to be in candy corn colors. Kind of disgusting.

30. Three black cats on the fence. Wonder what that could mean?

Does it mean bad luck or just 3 cats sitting on a fence. Either way, looks like the kind of Halloween sweater you'd see on a crazy cat person.

Does it mean bad luck or just 3 cats sitting on a fence. Either way, looks like the kind of Halloween sweater you’d see on a crazy cat person.

31. Nothing like a Halloween sweater where all the pumpkins are stacked against one another.

Of course, one of the pumpkins has candy corn eyes. Another one has a sad face. And then there's candy corn from the sky.

Of course, one of the pumpkins has candy corn eyes. Another one has a sad face. And then there’s candy corn from the sky.

32. Remember that candy corn pants always goes well with a sweater of a witch flying to the moon.

Now this guy really feels like he's rocking in that look. Like he's now the tacky neighbor who gives out candy to trick or treaters.

Now this guy really feels like he’s rocking in that look. Like he’s now the tacky neighbor who gives out candy to trick or treaters.

33. Of course, why have a tacky Halloween sweater while you can make your dog wear one?

Not sure if dressing your dog in a candy corn sweater and hat is the right thing to do here. Seriously, that dog doesn't look very happy in this.

Not sure if dressing your dog in a candy corn sweater and hat is the right thing to do here. Seriously, that dog doesn’t look very happy in this.

34. Remember to keep your pets safe and warm this Halloween season.

I'm sure the dog doesn't need to wear this ridiculous sweater. I mean it already has something to keep it warm and dry. It's called fur.

I’m sure the dog doesn’t need to wear this ridiculous sweater. I mean it already has something to keep it warm and dry. It’s called fur.

35. You never know what you’ll find at a creepy haunted house this Halloween.

I don't know if bright orange makes a great haunted house color. Seems a bit too loud for something that's supposed to look decrepit and old.

I don’t know if bright orange makes a great haunted house color. Seems a bit too loud for something that’s supposed to look decrepit and old.

36. With a Halloween vest, you can’t have too many bears.

Yes, bears are scary creatures you wouldn't want to run into while in the woods. However, teddy bears are just plain adorable and not scary at all. Yeah, this is a very tacky vest.

Yes, bears are scary creatures you wouldn’t want to run into while in the woods. However, teddy bears are just plain adorable and not scary at all. Yeah, this is a very tacky vest.

37. Heard of a Halloween sweater? How about a Halloween poncho?

And it seems this one is in bright blue and decked with ghosts and bats. Seems that the ghosts are trying to be quite scary. Not sure if they are. Probably not.

And it seems this one is in bright blue and decked with ghosts and bats. Seems that the ghosts are trying to be quite scary. Not sure if they are. Probably not.

38. Nothing makes a great Halloween sweater than a candy corn eyed teddy bear in a costume.

For some reason, the candy corn eyes make this bear look so creepy. Not sure why.

For some reason, the candy corn eyes make this bear look so creepy. Not sure why.

39. Why don’t you say “Happy Halloween” on your vest?

Now this looks like something a teacher would wear. But yeah, the "Happy Halloween" bit kind of makes this sweater a bit more tacky than it would be without the words.

Now this looks like something a teacher would wear. But yeah, the “Happy Halloween” bit kind of makes this sweater a bit more tacky than it would be without the words.

40. Of course, anyone who loves Halloween and Atari will love this T-shirt.

I'd watch out for the green skulls if I were you. They might be zombies and after your brains.

I’d watch out for the green skulls if I were you. They might be zombies and after your brains.

41. Nothing brings in the Halloween spirit than a sweater depicting a headless witch.

For some reason, I thought this was a sweater depicting a burning windmill. And I wondered why the hell would anyone want a Halloween sweater of that? The headless witch idea makes more sense.

For some reason, I thought this was a sweater depicting a burning windmill. And I wondered why the hell would anyone want a Halloween sweater of that? The headless witch idea makes more sense.

42. Of course, if you want style, go with some Halloween houndsooth.

Sorry, but houndsooth is a pattern for business attire. Not for Halloween attire. And bright orange, seriously?

Sorry, but houndsooth is a pattern for business attire. Not for Halloween attire. And bright orange, seriously?

43. On Halloween, you can’t get enough pumpkins and candy.

Of course, this is a colorful cardigan with the candy and all. However, I'm not sure about the pumpkins.

Of course, this is a colorful cardigan with the candy and all. However, I’m not sure about the pumpkins.

44. When it comes to Halloween sweaters, you can’t ignore the classics such as an orange one with a jack o’lantern.

Luckily for him, he can wear this to a Halloween party and everyone would assume it's his costume. Still, pretty tacky if you get my drift.

Luckily for him, he can wear this to a Halloween party and everyone would assume it’s his costume. Still, pretty tacky if you get my drift.

45. When it comes to Halloween, I’m sure a skeleton shirt will make it all hang out.

I think this woman should cover up if you ask me. She's showing too much of herself at the moment.

I think this woman should cover up if you ask me. She’s showing too much of herself at the moment.

46. If you want to hear some scary stories, you can’t do better than the tales of Edgar Allan Poe.

Now this is a clever sweater idea. Poe is indeed quite menacing in this. Still, wonder if he'll freak out trick or treaters with this one.

Now this is a clever sweater idea. Poe is indeed quite menacing in this. Still, wonder if he’ll freak out trick or treaters with this one.

47. Nothing brings out the spirit of Halloween than skeletons going boogie at a disco club.

Hope neither ruptures a hip. Or cause any scare among the other dancers. Still, this is quite funny.

Hope neither ruptures a hip. Or cause any scare among the other dancers. Still, this is quite funny.

48. Seems like this witch has a lot of stuff in her closet.

Let's see. She has 3 dresses, 4 pairs of boots, 4 hats, and 3 brooms. And I thought witches wore the same thing all the time.

Let’s see. She has 3 dresses, 4 pairs of boots, 4 hats, and 3 brooms. And I thought witches wore the same thing all the time.

49. Nothing says Halloween like a diamond and skull sweater vest.

Now I'm sure such sweater vests aren't seen as cool. Still, this is quite funny. Wonder who'd be creeped out by this.

Now I’m sure such sweater vests aren’t seen as cool. Still, this is quite funny. Wonder who’d be creeped out by this.

50. Now this is a great Halloween sweater for any crazy cat lady.

When looking at this sweater do you get the feeling that you're being watched? Or is it just me? Do those eyes seem creepy to you?

When looking at this sweater do you get the feeling that you’re being watched? Or is it just me? Do those eyes seem creepy to you?

51. Beaded sequins always makes your Halloween sweaters shimmer and stand out.

Not sure if the flashy stuff on this makes it look better or worse. Either way, it sure looks tacky.

Not sure if the flashy stuff on this makes it look better or worse. Either way, it sure looks tacky. Also, what’s with the ghosts.

52. If you like a checkered pattern, I’m sure you can get pumpkins to fit in any shape.

Seems like some of these pumpkins don't like being confined to an unnatural shape. Others seem to be quite square.

Seems like some of these pumpkins don’t like being confined to an unnatural shape. Others seem to be quite square.

53. At night, you’re bound to see an owl on a perch.

Now that looks like an owl you can see from a mile. Still, its feathers have sequins and it's gleaming with starry eyes.

Now that looks like an owl you can see from a mile. Still, its feathers have sequins and it’s gleaming with starry eyes.

54. Apparently, some dead body can’t seem to take their hands off her.

Let's just say that this is the kind of shirt nobody should wear on Halloween, especially where there's kids trick or treating. Kids might not understand but their parents would. Also, hands are said to glow in the dark.

Let’s just say that this is the kind of shirt nobody should wear on Halloween, especially where there’s kids trick or treating. Kids might not understand but their parents would. Also, hands are said to glow in the dark.

55. If you want to get festive, you can always go with rows.

Now this one seems to be made in true ugly Christmas sweater fashion. Kids might already see this one among the adults giving them candy.

Now this one seems to be made in true ugly Christmas sweater fashion. Kids might already see this one among the adults giving them candy.

56. Anyone wearing a ghost costume, raise your hands.

Seems that ghost costumes tend to be the easiest to sew on. Still, doesn't seem like spooky attire if you ask me.

Seems that ghost costumes tend to be the easiest to sew on. Still, doesn’t seem like spooky attire if you ask me.

57. You might not know it but ghosts seem to have a thing for spiderwebs.

Not sure what the spiders would think. But I don't think the ghosts seem to care. Still, I'm sure ghosts don't eat candy.

Not sure what the spiders would think. But I don’t think the ghosts seem to care. Still, I’m sure ghosts don’t eat candy.

58. You can’t have a Halloween sweater without including a scarecrow.

And there's that teddy bear in the pumpkin costume again. Kind of like the two ghosts though. And the jack o'lantern.

And there’s that teddy bear in the pumpkin costume again. Kind of like the two ghosts though. And the jack o’lantern.

59. Of course, nothing makes your Halloween vest stand out like shiny materials and embroidery.

Now this is just plain crazy. I mean brown ghosts? And what are those green things? Are they supposed to be plants?

Now this is just plain crazy. I mean brown ghosts? And what are those green things? Are they supposed to be plants?

60. You don’t get enough of Halloween until you wear a sweater like this.

Now this seems like a tacky patchwork in the making. Still, the pumpkin seems smiling but there doesn't seem to be a candle in it.

Now this seems like a tacky patchwork in the making. Still, the pumpkin seems smiling but there doesn’t seem to be a candle in it.

Ghastly Halloween Greetings in the Ghoulish Days of Old

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

vintage-halloween-card11

While Halloween cards are available at any store, they aren’t usually considered a Halloween tradition by most people. I mean it’s not a big card holiday by any stretch of the imagination today. After all, Halloween may be a big holiday, but it’s nowhere near as important as holidays like Christmas or Easter. However, back when everyone basically wrote letters to their loved ones, it wasn’t unusual for people to send greeting cards to their friends and family on almost every major holiday. Halloween being among them. Now some of these might be quite cutesy and delightful like you’d expect from any vintage greeting card. However, this post isn’t about them because I know showing cutesy vintage Halloween cards would make me lose disenchanted viewers. Instead, I’ll show vintage Halloween cards that might make you wonder what kind of recreational drugs greeting card designers were on during the 19th century. Some of them are quite creepy like you’d expect. Others are downright weird and possibly inappropriate. So for your reading pleasure, here are some old timey Halloween greeting cards, guaranteed to freak you out.

  1. Nothing brings out the Halloween spirit more than pranking a cop.
Now that boy may be laughing tonight. But I'm sure that won't be the case tomorrow. Don't prank cops. That's just asking for trouble, especially if you're black.

Now that boy may be laughing tonight. But I’m sure that won’t be the case tomorrow. You know when the cop gives him a brutally violent beatdown for knocking off his hat. Don’t prank cops. That’s just asking for trouble, especially if you’re black.

2. Back in the day people played Halloween games a little differently.

Apparently fishing for apples and bondage were a big part of Halloween festivities back in the day. At least among the adults of course.

Apparently fishing for apples and bondage were a big part of Halloween festivities back in the day. At least among the adults of course.

3. On Halloween night, your fate is in your hands.

So on Halloween night, don't dress up like a sailor. Or else the angry pumpkin god will murder you. Then again, he might murder if you don't either.

So on Halloween night, don’t dress up like a sailor. Or else the angry pumpkin god will murder you. Then again, he might murder if you don’t either.

4. “On Halloween by pumpkin light, this witch will help you choose right.”

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “I’m not sure what the witch is helping her choose… what shade of blush to wear perhaps? Should a person really be accepting blindfolded beauty tips from a witch?”

5. On Halloween, let the burning walnuts decide who’s right for you.

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “That’s right folks, allow life’s truly important decisions to be settled by walnuts on fire. It’s a great way to decide on whom to marry, what stocks to invest in, whether or not to commit suicide, etc.”

6. Have a jolly Halloween and write back. Or else.

Something tells me that this girl might grow up to be the crazy homicidal girlfriend of her time. Really don't have a great feeling of seeing her with that knife. Yeah, I think you might want to write that letter.

Something tells me that this girl might grow up to be the crazy homicidal girlfriend of her time. Really don’t have a great feeling of seeing her with that knife. Yeah, I think you might want to write that letter.

7. Halloween greetings, courtesy of the ghost pumpkin.

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “It looked festive enough at first, but then it was set ablaze and took on a whole new meaning.” Guess the kids would be turned to ash by morning. Poor kids.

8. On Halloween, be aware of things that might not be what they seem.

While she didn't know it at the time, Susie unwittingly staged the first bra burning in history. Of course, this was because she mistook a bra on the coat rack for a ghost.

While she didn’t know it at the time, Susie unwittingly staged the first bra burning in history. Of course, this was because she mistook a bra on the coat rack for a ghost.

9. Happy Halloween from the naked pumpkin man and his black cat.

“I’ll love ’em and squeeze ’em and keep ’em forever and ever.” Yeah, I’m sure the cat’s not liking that. Who would anyway.

10. Of course, nothing says Halloween like a romantic serenade with pumpkin heads.

Man, this seems to take out all the romance out of serenading someone. Yeah, if Romeo and Juliet were done with pumpkin heads, it would look as stupid as this.

Man, this seems to take out all the romance out of serenading someone. Yeah, if Romeo and Juliet were done with pumpkin heads, it would look as stupid as this.

11. There’s nothing on Halloween like spending a night stealing front gates from other people’s homes.

Better hope that the owner can afford a new gate and doesn't call the cops. Because Halloween or not, theft and vandalism are crimes.

Better hope that the owner can afford a new gate and doesn’t call the cops. Because Halloween or not, theft and vandalism are crimes.

12. Nothing says Halloween like having pumpkin children put jack o’lanterns on their black cats.

Man, black cats really get a raw deal. If everyone doesn't think they're bad luck, they're being subjected to other types of animal cruelty. Seriously, it seems like black cats bring more bad luck to themselves. Also, those pumpkin heads are freaky.

Man, black cats really get a raw deal. If everyone doesn’t think they’re bad luck, they’re being subjected to other types of animal cruelty. Seriously, it seems like black cats bring more bad luck to themselves. Also, those pumpkin heads are freaky.

13. Scared of ghosts? Your pig will take care of it.

“Oh, shit, Howard, that pumpkin was supposed to be part of my Halloween costume this year. Now I have to go as a ghost for the 3rd year in a row.”

14. “If we were here, I’d bet I’d find a red ear.”

Hey, I didn't know they had Oompa Loompas on Halloween greeting cards. Then again, they are quite terrifying in their own right.

Hey, I didn’t know they had Oompa Loompas on Halloween greeting cards. Then again, they are quite terrifying in their own right.

15. Remember, on Halloween, the more puffs it takes to blow out a candle, the less likely you’ll be married within a year.

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “And if it’s one of those trick self-relighting candles, you can sleep with the girlfriend/boyfriend of
whoever left it in front of you because that jerk just ruined your chances of ever getting married.”

16. Nothing makes great Halloween fun than shoving a wooden stake up somebody’s ass.

Oooh, sure hate to be that guy. Yeah, that's sure going to be a real pain in the ass, literally. Good luck, sitting comfortably after that.

Oooh, sure hate to be that guy. Yeah, that’s sure going to be a real pain in the ass, literally. Good luck, sitting comfortably after that.

17. Happy Halloween greetings and don’t mind the black cats crossing your path.

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “When one black cat crosses your path, it’s bad luck. When many cross your path? It’s a conga line and you had damn well better join in the fun.” Or else, you’ll probably have bad luck for the rest of your life.

18. You can’t celebrate Halloween without enjoying a piece of pumpkin pie.

Now it seems that old Jack is faced with an ethical dilemma. Though he didn't want to offend his host, he wasn't too keen on engaging in cannibalism either.

Now it seems that old Jack is faced with an ethical dilemma. Though he didn’t want to offend his host, he wasn’t too keen on engaging in cannibalism either.

19. Uh-oh, seems like the witch should really check how fast she’s driving.

Because I don't think the cucumber had long to live after this. In fact, it's most likely he was turned into cucumber mush.

Because I don’t think the cucumber had long to live after this. In fact, it’s most likely he was turned into cucumber mush.

20. Surprisingly, it seems that jack o’lanterns are interested in the teachings of Jesus Christ.

Of course, they might just be reading from a pamphlet left over by some mega church or Jehovah's Witnesses. Still pretty funny though.

Of course, since they didn’t understand much of what they read in the Bible, they decided to get a book that would clear things up. Or they were just bored. I don’t know.

21. Remember that traveling with a candle at night keeps the goblins away.

However, this is only as long as the candle is unscented. Because goblins just love scented candles.

However, this is only as long as the candle is unscented. Because goblins just love scented candles.

22. Just so you know, pumpkin monsters always enjoy sweets.

I've seen quite a lot of these in vintage Halloween cards. And I think they're just utterly freaky as hell and designed by someone on some absinthe addiction.

I’ve seen quite a lot of these in vintage Halloween cards. And I think they’re just utterly freaky as hell and designed by someone on some absinthe addiction.

23. On Halloween, you’ll see all kinds of strange things out there.

Like a pumpkin headed woman in a kimono with her eyes strung up by nailed ropes. Yeah, very strange and freaky indeed.

Like a pumpkin headed woman in a kimono with her eyes strung up by nailed ropes. Yeah, very strange and freaky indeed.

24. If you laugh at a witch on Halloween, you’ll be turned into a pumpkin person.

I don't get what was so funny about the witch here. But still, a pumpkin guy like that smoking a pipe? Well, that's just goddamn ridiculous, it's hilarious.

I don’t get what was so funny about the witch here. But still, a pumpkin guy like that smoking a pipe? Well, that’s just goddamn ridiculous, it’s hilarious.

25. Happy Halloween, now let’s watch these two split a guy’s acorn squash head open.

Okay, that is just plain wrong. I mean the squash obviously has a face. Makes me wonder what they did with the rest of him.

Okay, that is just plain wrong. I mean the squash obviously has a face. Makes me wonder what they did with the rest of him.

26. For a wild pig, there’s nothing on Halloween like tripping a Scotsman.

Hope the guy didn't land on his head or he might've found himself in an embarrassing situation. This assuming that there's truth in the notion that Scots wear nothing under their kilts.

Hope the guy didn’t land on his head or he might’ve found himself in an embarrassing situation. This assuming that there’s truth in the notion that Scots wear nothing under their kilts.

27. Happy Halloween and watch out for the cops or that black cat.

Looks like that one mouse is being chased by some cop over some Halloween vandalism. Meanwhile, I'm sure the cheese holding mouse's time with his girlfriend will be his last.

Looks like that one mouse is being chased by some cop over some Halloween vandalism. Meanwhile, I’m sure the cheese holding mouse’s time with his girlfriend will be his last.

28. You “auto” have a happy Halloween.

And you

And you “auto” not drive while on acid. I think this guy had a bit too many. Oh my God, those eyes!

29. Hope your candle stays lit at both ends this Halloween.

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “Actually, if both candles stay lit, a vampire bat will come drop a load of guano in your jack-o-lantern’s nasal cavity.” Yeah, sounds about right.

30. May you have a thrilling Halloween but beware of the pumpkin ghosts.

I-Mockery:

I-Mockery: “Nothing makes for a thrilling Halloween quite like a trio of pumpkin ghosts having just raped flying black cats in the sky.” Yeah, the cats look really traumatized up there.

31. “I’ll get you, my pretty, and with my goblin army, no one will stop me.”

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “I’m all for trying to scare people, but was it really necessary for that one goblin to moon this couple?Also, the actual moon is really enjoying sniffing that poor woman’s ass. Creepy.” I’ll say. Yeah, don’t want the moon sniffing up my ass either.

32. May the light keep the Devil away from you this Halloween night.

From I-Mockery:

From I-Mockery: “The Devil will gladly drop his pitchfork to seize the opportunity to have a pumpkin man help shove an archaic fleshlight onto his crotch.” So that’s what the fringed bon-bon looking thing is. Don’t really see that with the devil.

33. Halloween is always known as a night for mischief.

“Oh, shit, must’ve slept over Halloween and missed the witches’ meeting. And they’re putting their Christmas decorations out now.” What an idiot.

34. Remember that on Halloween, your pumpkin could become a portal releasing a mist of evils into this world if you leave it on top of a dessert.

Now that's guaranteed to traumatize children. This is especially true with the jack o'lantern clown face.

Now that’s guaranteed to traumatize children. This is especially true with the creepy jack o’lantern clown face.

35. Of course, witches’ meetings always have to have musical accompaniment.

Yeah, I bet you'd freak out if you saw what was under that pumpkin man's kilt. Really don't want to know about that.

Yeah, I bet you’d freak out if you saw what was under that pumpkin man’s kilt. Really don’t want to know about that.

36. Happy Halloween, and don’t let Mr. McGregor chase you out of the pumpkin patch.

"Goddamn, kids, how dare you steal my pumpkins! I'll make you pay for this!"

“Goddamn, kids, how dare you steal my pumpkins! I’ll make you pay for this! You haven’t heard the last of it!”

37. Remember to protect yourself against rouge jack o’lanterns.

Not sure who I'm more scared of in this: the fearful jack o'lantern or the creepy boy with the knife. Decisions, decisions.

Not sure who I’m more scared of in this: the fearful jack o’lantern or the creepy boy with the knife. Decisions, decisions.

38. Nothing beats the festivities on Halloween night than seeing a bunch of jack o’lanterns playing poker.

"Charlie, you might want to bow out of the game if you lose this round. I know you don't have a lot of money and you'll have to run out somehow. Besides, you've already put $500 in the pot already.

“Charlie, you might want to bow out of the game if you lose this round. I know you don’t have a lot of money and you’ll have to run out somehow. Besides, the rest of us have enough to play all night.”

39. “Don’t be scared. The goblins are just having fun. They’re not trying to hurt you.”

Yeah, those goblins are only out to have a good time, evil witch lady in red. Of course, she's the one letting them out of the pumpkin. Not sure if I trust her.

Yeah, those goblins are only out to have a good time, evil witch lady in red. Of course, she’s the one letting them out of the pumpkin. Not sure if I trust her.

40. Of course, Halloween is a time for lovers to make up in the pumpkin patch.

Okay, let me get this straight. These two pumpkins are making out inside another pumpkin which is watching in anticipation. Does anyone see anything wrong with that?

Okay, let me get this straight. These two pumpkins are making out inside another pumpkin which is watching in anticipation. Does anyone see anything wrong with that?

41. Have a safe and happy Halloween, and don’t worry about spending the night in the pumpkin patch.

If these spirits were lurking around in the pumpkin patch every night, I suppose Linus would have second thoughts about waiting for the Great Pumpkin. Yeah, he might think spending all night in the pumpkin patch just isn't worth it.

If these spirits were lurking around in the pumpkin patch every night, I suppose Linus would have second thoughts about waiting for the Great Pumpkin. Yeah, he might think spending all night in the pumpkin patch just isn’t worth it.

42. Remember step away from the light!

I'm sure that kid in red is a racist caricature from the facial expression. But yeah, I'd be shitting my pants if I saw a big, moving jack o'lantern head with feathers on top.

I’m sure that kid in red is a racist caricature from the facial expression. But yeah, I’d be shitting my pants if I saw a big, moving jack o’lantern head with feathers on top.

43. Of course, human and pumpkin head pairings weren’t always frowned upon.

I see the pumpkin guy is really impressed by the night lady's ta-tas (as you can guess how creepily he stares at them). Still, God only knows what their kids would look like if they ever procreate.

I see the pumpkin guy is really impressed by the night lady’s ta-tas (as you can guess how creepily he stares at them). You can guess where this is headed.

44. Remember that ghosts could be lurking around these parts on All Hallows Eve.

While Pumpkin headed men in white sheets could be leading children to their untimely deaths. Yeah, stay way from pumpkin headed ghosts, please.

While Pumpkin headed men in white sheets could be leading children to their untimely deaths. Yeah, stay way from pumpkin headed ghosts, please.

45. Remember, children, that if a pumpkin headed ghost doesn’t lead you to your death, he’ll force you to row his boat for free.

"C'mon, kid's the night's not going to last for ever. Row faster. Row faster." Man, that pumpkin head is terrifying.

“C’mon, kid’s the night’s not going to last for ever. Row faster. Row faster.” Man, that pumpkin head is terrifying.

46. Sleep tight this Halloween night because you run the risk of being kidnapped by bat flying goblins.

I would be screaming like hell if I were that girl. But she seems more curious and calm about being abducted for some reason.

I would be screaming like hell if I were that girl. But she seems more curious and calm about being abducted for some reason.

47. Of course, beware of the witches peering in windows looking for delicious children to eat.

"Let's see. The younger girl is too skinny. The older girl is chunky enough but that doesn't mean anything. But the little boy is muscular which is just right."

“Let’s see. The younger girl is too skinny. The older girl is chunky enough but that doesn’t mean anything. But the little boy is muscular which is just right. Perhaps I can cook him medium rare.”

48. Apparently, demons like to torture pumpkin people in their spare time.

Like I said before, those pumpkin people are creepy as hell. I mean they look like they're from another planet. The demons aren't much better.

Like I said before, those pumpkin people are creepy as hell. I mean they look like they’re from another planet. The demons aren’t much better.

49. Don’t forget to put on a show with your costume this Halloween night.

And it seems this woman is performing a strip show with all the perverted pumpkin heads watching. And she's about to disrobe her skull and crossbones cape.

And it seems this woman is performing a strip show with all the perverted pumpkin heads watching. And she’s about to disrobe her skull and crossbones cape.

50. “May the Halloween nutshell, unto you a good fortune tell.”

Of course, I can guess this is a vision a card designer got after drinking too much absinthe. Yeah, kind of freaky if you agree with me, especially with the jack o'lanterns on her wings.

Of course, I can guess this is a vision a card designer got after drinking too much absinthe. Yeah, kind of freaky if you agree with me, especially with the jack o’lanterns on her wings.

Halloween Cakes

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

halloween-treat-92

When it comes to finding tacky and inappropriate stuff for Halloween, it’s a unique challenge compared to most holidays. I mean when you got a holiday like Christmas, Easter, and Valentines Day, anything that seems gross, inappropriate, creepy, or tacky will do. Since Halloween is known for stuff that intentionally scare or creep people out, this poses a unique challenge. If you want to know, you can see my post on vintage Halloween ads. And finding bad Halloween cakes are no exception. Now I know that many people have parties for Halloween and might also order cakes as well. Now I can do a post showing all the great scary Halloween cakes out there. But you would probably not read it at all. So instead, I’ll focus on the store bought pastry disasters that would scare even the most terrifying monster out there. So without further adieu, here are some Halloween cakes not worth scaring for.

  1. When ordering Halloween cupcakes, it’s recommended you go with bats.
Those are bats? Seriously, they just look black scribbles on orange icing.

Those are bats? Seriously, they just look black scribbles on orange icing. You’d expect stuff like that from a 4-year-old.

2. “Happy Hallowen, Trick or Troat?”

Seriously, do cake decorators not have spell check or something? Because I think people know how to spell "Halloween" and "treat."

Seriously, do cake decorators not have spell check or something? Because I think people know how to spell “Halloween” and “treat.”

3. Of course, a ghost is a simple design for any Halloween cake. Let’s hope nobody messes this up.

I'm sure ghosts take a fluid appearance and you can take some degree of leeway drawing one. However, these look like sperm, not ghosts. A decorator should know not to draw anything that looks like sperm.

I’m sure ghosts take a fluid appearance and you can take some degree of leeway drawing one. However, these look like sperm, not ghosts. A decorator should know not to draw anything that looks like sperm.

4. Now these look like cupcakes you can really get your hands on.

Actually contrary to what Colonel Sanders once said, these don't look anywhere near finger lickin' good. In fact, they look very finger lickin' bad in my mind.

Actually contrary to what Colonel Sanders once said, these don’t look anywhere near finger lickin’ good. In fact, they look very finger lickin’ bad in my mind.

5. Of course, I heard that Frankenstein’s monster is a very popular cake design this Halloween.

Okay, what the hell is this? I mean that doesn't look like Frankenstein's monster. He does not have a head shaped like that or teeth going sideways.

Okay, what the hell is this? I mean that doesn’t look like Frankenstein’s monster. He does not have a head shaped like that or teeth going sideways.

6. Well, at least this Frankenstein monster cake has a face, save for maybe the nose.

That's a nose? Really, that looks like something that belongs between Frankenstein's legs than his eyes. Seriously, who decorates noses like that? That's crazy.

That’s a nose? Really, that looks like something that belongs between Frankenstein’s legs than his eyes. Seriously, who decorates noses like that? That’s crazy.

7. Hop aboard the Rest in Peace Bus, we give free rides!

What's with the green fingers hanging from the trunk? That makes no goddamn sense for some reason.

What’s with the green fingers hanging from the trunk? That makes no goddamn sense for some reason.

8. Of course, bats always carry a rather scary feature on any Halloween cake, especially in groups.

For the love of God, those don't look like bats. They might as well be birds for crying out loud. Can't the cake decorator know the difference?

For the love of God, those don’t look like bats. They might as well be birds for crying out loud. Can’t the cake decorator know the difference?

9. Cake not scary enough? Put a spider on it.

Sorry, but I don't think a spider is helping in this situation, especially if it looks like a cute little fur ball. This cake is lame.

Sorry, but I don’t think a spider is helping in this situation, especially if it looks like a cute little fur ball. This cake is lame.

10. Hope your Halloween party is a blast with this vampire Elvis cake.

From Cake Wrecks: "I vant choo to stay off of my blue svade shoos! Muah! Ah! Ah!" Yeah, not very intimidating at all.

From Cake Wrecks: “I vant choo to stay off of my blue svade shoos! Muah! Ah! Ah!” Yeah, not very intimidating at all.

11. Not surprisingly, pumpkins are another popular cake subject for Halloween.

And this one just happens to remind me of Edvard Munch's The Scream for some reason. Also, its nose is too close to its mouth.

And this one just happens to remind me of Edvard Munch’s The Scream for some reason. Also, its nose is too close to its mouth.

12. On any monstrous Halloween cake, you can’t have too many eyeballs.

From Cake Wrecks: "I was looking at a mud puddle, and it spoke to me, and it said, 'Give me the face of a hippie, man. Plus a crap ton of edible glitter and plastic eyeballs.' So I did." Couldn't say it better myself.

From Cake Wrecks: “I was looking at a mud puddle, and it spoke to me, and it said, ‘Give me the face of a hippie, man. Plus a crap ton of edible glitter and plastic eyeballs.’ So I did.” Couldn’t say it better myself.

13. Of course, adding blood can makes things all the more scarier.

Now what is this? Ghost? Skeleton? Something from a horror movie? A bad attempt at drawing anything worth freaking people out? You decide.

Now what is this? Ghost? Skeleton? Something from a horror movie? A bad attempt at drawing anything worth freaking people out? You decide.

14. Beware of the pink plastic footed purple brick monster!

From Cake Wrecks: "What's got four plastic feet, plastic eyes, a plastic hat, and vaguely disconcerting icing "hair" sprouting out of a purple brick? I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS THIS." Me neither. Nor do I want to know.

From Cake Wrecks: “What’s got four plastic feet, plastic eyes, a plastic hat, and vaguely disconcerting icing “hair” sprouting out of a purple brick? I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS THIS.” Me neither. Nor do I want to know.

15. When doing a vampire cake, make sure it looks like one that could suck your blood.

However, this isn't how you should do a vampire cake for Halloween. This vampire looks like he's an embarrassing love child of the Count from Sesame Street. Seriously, it's too cute.

However, this isn’t how you should do a vampire cake for Halloween. This vampire looks like he’s an embarrassing love child of the Count from Sesame Street. Seriously, it’s too cute.

16. All right, if you can’t choose between ghost and jack o’lantern, we could just mesh them together. Nobody will notice.

Actually they will. I mean that doesn't look like any pumpkin I've seen in my life. Now it just seems to resemble a really misshapen pumpkin for almost no reason at all.

Actually they will. I mean that doesn’t look like any pumpkin I’ve seen in my life. Now it just seems to resemble a really misshapen pumpkin for almost no reason at all.

17. Always try to give your monster cake a scary face if you could.

Now that's a face that could haunt anyone's nightmares. But not necessarily for the right reasons though.

Now that’s a face that could haunt anyone’s nightmares. But not necessarily for the right reasons though. Still, don’t what the hell this thing is supposed to be. And that’s pretty scary.

18. Beware the dreaded pod baby if you dare.

Now what the hell does this have to do with Halloween? Other than the fangs, I don't see any point. Also, this is just so weird looking for some reason.

Now what the hell does this have to do with Halloween? Other than the fangs, I don’t see any point. Also, this is just so weird looking for some reason.

19. Sometimes it’s best to go simple such as a moon and night sky.

That does not look like a moon in the night sky. That looks like a banana shooting laser beams. Doesn't make any sense whatsoever.

That does not look like a moon in the night sky. That looks like a banana shooting laser beams. Doesn’t make any sense whatsoever.

20. If you want a simple cake design this Halloween, go with a ghost.

This is not a ghost. This is a roll of darkened toilet paper with arms and eyes. And now, it's angry.

This is not a ghost. This is a roll of darkened toilet paper with arms and eyes. And now, it’s angry.

21. Remember, that yellow eyes can make a ghost look even scarier, especially semicircular ones.

From Cake Wrecks: "I am not 'pretty,' I AM THE TERRIFYING TP! Here to WIPE you out! Mwuah-ha-haaawhy are you laughing?" Yeah, that does look like a really scary roll of toilet paper. Not.

From Cake Wrecks: “I am not ‘pretty,’ I AM THE TERRIFYING TP! Here to WIPE you out! Mwuah-ha-haaawhy are you laughing?” Yeah, that does look like a really scary roll of toilet paper. Not.

22. Nothing is scarier on Halloween than a giant green monster.

From Cake Wrecks: "Next we have an ice cream swirl wearing a traffic cone about to be impaled by a trident. Because if THAT doesn't say "Happy Halloween"... then don't worry 'cuz the board does." Yeah, kind of looks like that. Also reminds me a bit of the Pirate Parrot for some reason. Not sure why.

From Cake Wrecks: “Next we have an ice cream swirl wearing a traffic cone about to be impaled by a trident. Because if THAT doesn’t say “Happy Halloween”… then don’t worry ‘cuz the board does.” Yeah, kind of looks like that. Also reminds me a bit of the Pirate Parrot for some reason. Not sure why.

23. Nothing is scarier in a modern home than a possessed stove burner.

You know the kind of burners that spontaneously set fire to whole kitchens without any alert from the smoke detector. Yeah, haunted appliances are so in right now.

You know the kind of burners that spontaneously set fire to whole kitchens without any alert from the smoke detector. Yeah, haunted appliances are so in right now.

24. Nothing captures the spirit of Halloween more than a cake of mummified, misshapen candy corn?

Oh, my God. For one, nobody likes candy corn, let alone with a smiley face. Second, it's even more stupid that it's made to look like a mummy.

Oh, my God. For one, nobody likes candy corn, let alone with a smiley face. Second, it’s even more stupid that it’s made to look like a mummy.

25. When it comes to making you gag this Halloween season, maggots can’t be beat.

Now I know that there's a lot of gross stuff associated with Halloween. But I think maggot cakes would just make me either throw up or lose my appetite.

Now I know that there’s a lot of gross stuff associated with Halloween. But I think maggot cakes would just make me either throw up or lose my appetite.

26. Want a creepy cake? Go with a green spider.

Yes, it has 8 legs and fangs. But it doesn't seem creepy or scary for some reason. In fact, it looks pretty lame if I do say so myself.

Yes, it has 8 legs and fangs. But it doesn’t seem creepy or scary for some reason. In fact, it looks pretty lame if I do say so myself.

27. When doing a circular cake, always stick with a pumpkin.

That's not a pumpkin. That's an orange baseball with eyes after a dog has just taken a crap on it. What it has to do with Halloween, I have no idea.

That’s not a pumpkin. That’s an orange baseball with eyes after a dog has just taken a crap on it. What it has to do with Halloween, I have no idea.

28. Summon your dead ancestors to your Halloween party with this Oujia board cake.

Now that's the worst spelling of Ouijia I've ever seen. Seriously, where's a dictionary when you need it. Could see that the decorator really needed help with this one.

Now that’s the worst spelling of Ouijia I’ve ever seen. Seriously, where’s a dictionary when you need it. Could see that the decorator really needed help with this one.

29. Of course, ghosts cakes can have virtually any shape.

Since when does toilet paper ever get angry? I thought being an ass wipe was the gist of its existence.

Since when does toilet paper ever get angry? I thought being an ass wipe was the gist of its existence.

30. When you don’t have a Halloween monster in mind, you can always design your own.

Now this is what you get when you cross Princess Leia, Dracula, a Sesame Street muppet and Bride of Frankenstein. Yeah, not very scary if you ask me.

Now this is what you get when you cross Princess Leia, Dracula, a Sesame Street muppet and Bride of Frankenstein. Yeah, not very scary if you ask me.

31. Nothing makes a Halloween cake like having creepy crawlies on it.

Now I can understand why you have the spider and web. But why ants? Seriously, ants aren't scary unless they're as big as Godzilla like in Them! Besides, there are plenty of more suitable insects out there to give people the heebie jeebies. Ants aren't among them.

Now I can understand why you have the spider and web. But why ants? Seriously, ants aren’t scary unless they’re as big as Godzilla like in Them! Besides, there are plenty of more suitable insects out there to give people the heebie jeebies. Ants aren’t among them.

32. Happy Halloween from your colorful spermie friends?

Once again, ghosts shouldn't be decorated to look like sperm for God's sake. Second, what the hell do these colorful sperm have to do with Halloween?

Once again, ghosts shouldn’t be decorated to look like sperm for God’s sake. Second, what the hell do these colorful sperm have to do with Halloween?

33. Any cake can be a Halloween cake, you just have to add ghosts and pumpkins to it.

Let's just say when it comes to pop culture, a Spongebob Squarepants cake really doesn't make a great backdrop. In fact, it looks absolutely stupid.

Let’s just say when it comes to pop culture, a Spongebob Squarepants cake really doesn’t make a great backdrop. In fact, it looks absolutely stupid.

34. Of course, getting ghosts wrong can really lead to some awkward situation.

From Cake Wrecks: "WHAT in the name of sweet Lassie is that spider doing?!?" Was going to ask the same question myself. Okay, I don't want to know.

From Cake Wrecks: “WHAT in the name of sweet Lassie is that spider doing?!?” Was going to ask the same question myself. Okay, I don’t want to know.

35. Don’t have an idea for a Halloween cake? Just add some candy corn.

Candy Corn: the least popular thing associated with Halloween. It's basically inedible sugar wax.

Candy Corn: the least popular thing associated with Halloween. It’s basically inedible sugar wax. But it’s so easy, anyone can do it.

36. You can turn any cake into a Halloween one if you just add a plastic spider.

Before the spider was added, it was originally a birthday present cake. Now it's bound to freak you out now.

Before the spider was added, it was originally a birthday present cake. Now it’s bound to freak you out now. Yeah, spine-chilling.

37. “Have a nice day,” from your local smiley face vampire.

Now this is just wrong. I mean really wrong. Seriously, you can add fangs to a smiley face but it would never look appropriate for Halloween. Sorry, but this is just so ridiculous.

Now this is just wrong. I mean really wrong. Seriously, you can add fangs to a smiley face but it would never look appropriate for Halloween. Sorry, but this is just so ridiculous.

38. Need a Halloween cake fast. No problem, just stick an eyeball on a dog cake. Now it’s an eyeball monster.

Now that just doesn't look right for some reason. I mean it more or less resembles a dog with a freaking eyeball. More awkward than scary, don't you agree.

Now that just doesn’t look right for some reason. I mean it more or less resembles a dog with a freaking eyeball. More awkward than scary, don’t you agree.

39. Uh, a jack o’lantern cake is supposed to have eyes, right?

Let's just say I don't think a blind jack o'lantern really gives into the Halloween spirit. Seriously, that just looks like something is missing.

Let’s just say I don’t think a blind jack o’lantern really gives into the Halloween spirit. Seriously, that just looks like something is missing.

40. Need to sell a dog cake on Halloween? Make it into a zombie dog.

Oh, that is just doggone awful. You can make it green and add patches, but you can't make this dog even remotely scary.

Oh, that is just doggone awful. You can make it green and add patches, but you can’t make this dog even remotely scary.

Scary Fun with Halloween Vintage Advertising

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

vintageAd-ipswich-hosiery

Since Halloween has always been a popular holiday that involves costumes, parties, decorations, and trick or treating, it’s no surprise that plenty of companies try to cash in on the whole thing. And it was no different then than it is now. Of course, you have plenty of Halloween ads for food and clothes, but you also see plenty for things you might not expect like antifreeze. Besides, Halloween gives advertisers something to make money off of between Back to School and Christmas with a downtime of November in between. Yeah, I know I forgot Thanksgiving but that holiday is only celebrated in the United States and it’s not a particularly fun one at that. Well, I know it’s a big time for food advertisers. But I mostly wrote a vintage ad post for Thanksgiving because I was bored out of my mind. Still, while I can show some of the best vintage Halloween advertising, I know you’d all be bored to tears . So instead, I’ll focus on the Halloween ads that are unintentionally scary or funny, don’t seem to make sense, and have the possibility of being inappropriate. Some might feature creepy children. Some might imply scary messages. And some might seem like these advertisers would do almost anything to sell you their product. So without further adieu, here are some scary Halloween ads for your reading pleasure.

  1. Enjoy a scary ghost story with an Edison Phonograph.
For some reason the scariest thing about this ad to me is that chubby naked kid with the mirror. He just looks so evil under the full moon that it's disturbing.

For some reason the scariest thing about this ad to me is that chubby naked kid with the mirror. He just looks so evil under the full moon that it’s disturbing.

2. Necco: Everyone’s Favorite Gobblin’ Halloween Candy.

I'm sure the giant jack o'lantern would love kiddies stuffing giant Necco wafers into his mouth. Of course, we should all know that many Necco candies have a chemical composition similar to chalk.

I’m sure the giant jack o’lantern would love kiddies stuffing giant Necco wafers into his mouth. Of course, we should all know that many Necco candies have a chemical composition similar to chalk.

3. Seagram’s Five Crown: the whiskey for wasted witches.

Of course, this ad does shed life on witches like flying their broom under the influence and having people throw pumpkins at them. Of course, you never hear of either on Harry Potter.

Of course, this ad does shed life on witches like flying their broom under the influence and having people throw pumpkins at them. Of course, you never hear of either on Harry Potter.

4. With Necco wafers, there is no trick to this treat!

Yes, there is. Necco wafers are candies made from a mixture of sugar, blackboard chalk, and food coloring. They are utterly disgusting that they are usually the last items eaten in a trick or treater's Halloween candy. That's not my opinion that these are facts.

Yes, there is. Necco wafers are candies made from a mixture of sugar, blackboard chalk, and food coloring. They are utterly disgusting that they are usually the last items eaten in a trick or treater’s Halloween candy. That’s not my opinion that these are facts.

5. Frankenstein can’t have his Bloody Marys without Smirnoff.

Of course, Frankenstein has admitted in this ad that he has a drinking problem. So when he goes on the rampage at night, he's not angry. He's just going through an alcohol withdrawl because he was kicked out of a bar or the bars closed.

Of course, Frankenstein has admitted in this ad that he has a drinking problem. So when he goes on the rampage at night, he’s not angry. He’s just going through an alcohol withdrawal because he was kicked out of a bar or the bars closed.

6. US Royal Master: The ultimate tire….engineered to meet the unexpected such as slamming on the brakes so you don’t run over a bunch of trick or treaters paying no damn attention to the freaking road!

Of course, this ad runs like the driver doesn't even know that it's Halloween when kids trick or treat that time of night. Then again, trick or treaters crossing the street don't pose as much of a danger as the drunk Halloween partier on the way home.

Of course, this ad runs like the driver doesn’t even know that it’s Halloween when kids trick or treat that time of night. Then again, trick or treaters crossing the street don’t pose as much of a danger as the drunk Halloween partier on the way home.

7. Witchal: From the woods to relieve your pain.

Available at your local witches' coven near you. Just follow the cloud of smoke in the forest. Except if you live in California or Texas. Then you might need to call 911.

Available at your local witches’ coven near you. Just follow the cloud of smoke in the forest. Except if you live in California or Texas. Then you might need to call 911.

8. When his body was wreaking havoc in Sleepy Hollow, the Headless Horsemen’s head stayed behind to party.

Now this just fucked up. In fact, I didn't know the Headless Horseman had a head and wasn't just terrorizing Icabod Crane. Seriously, do you really need an ad like this for M&Ms? If Mars wanted to advertise M&Ms for Halloween, they could just use Yellow and Red.

Now this just fucked up. In fact, I didn’t know the Headless Horseman had a head and wasn’t just terrorizing Icabod Crane. Seriously, do you really need an ad like this for M&Ms? If Mars wanted to advertise M&Ms for Halloween, they could just use Yellow and Red.

9. Nissen’s Old Home Bread has vitamins and minerals for extra nourishment.

Is it just me or does this party scene look utterly creepy? The kids on the left seem like they're about to do something sinister. The girl seems like casting some black magic spell on the apples. And the little girl in the corner appears that she might want to take the stool from under her.

Is it just me or does this party scene look utterly creepy? The kids on the left seem like they’re about to do something sinister. The girl seems like casting some black magic spell on the apples. And the little girl in the corner appears that she might want to take the stool from under her.

10. Sanka Coffee: the witches’ brew guaranteed to calm your dad’s anger issues.

The last Sanka ad I featured back in May depicted a rather abusive father. This one depicts a rather angry one. So is Sanka trying to say that their coffee clamps down on domestic violence? Because I think it's a bit extreme to say so.

The last Sanka ad I featured back in May depicted a rather abusive father. This one depicts a rather angry one. So is Sanka trying to say that their coffee clamps down on domestic violence? Because I think it’s a bit extreme to say so.

11. Scare claims fool no one, so trust Old Gold for a treat instead of a treatment!

Cigarette ads fool no one. All they do is trick people into a very bad health habit that leads to respiratory problems, cancer, heart disease, yellow skin, and early death. And if you think that's scary, they also cause the same problems for people who have to deal with smokers. This is why so many public places have smoking bans.

Cigarette ads fool no one. All they do is trick people into a very bad health habit that leads to respiratory problems, cancer, heart disease, yellow skin, and early death. And if you think that’s scary, they also cause the same problems for people who have to deal with smokers. This is why so many public places have smoking bans.

12. This Halloween treat your kids to undergarments from the Minneapolis Knitting Works.

Now I know people had more kids than usual in those days. However, this fact doesn't make an ad featuring a bunch of them in their underwear any less awkward. Also, I think the little girl in white might have murder on the mind. She seems to have no soul.

Now I know people had more kids than usual in those days. However, this fact doesn’t make an ad featuring a bunch of them in their underwear any less awkward. Also, I think the little girl in white might have murder on the mind. She seems to have no soul.

13. Wake up this Halloween morning with Cream of Wheat cereal.

Now this would make a decent ad but Rastah had to show up and ruin it. Go away, Rastah. You're a stereotypical racist caricature known to offend African Americans. The world doesn't need you. Also, that girl looks as if she has no eyes.

Now this would make a decent ad but Rastah had to show up and ruin it. Go away, Rastah. You’re a stereotypical racist caricature known to offend African Americans. The world doesn’t need you. Also, that girl looks as if she has no eyes.

14. Trust Johnson & Johnson for all your pumpkin carving injuries.

Is it just me or is the mom seem to relish a bit too much in knife usage.

Is it just me or is the mom seem to relish a bit too much in knife usage. “Now this is how I’ll stab the hell out your father next time I catch him with one of those drunk whores at the bar. He’ll learn his lesson.”

15. Raisins: The Halloween fruit treat that makes everybody happy.

Actually children don't like raisins. Nor do adults in that matter. Seriously, whenever I bite into a raisin cookie, I usually have a bad taste of disappointment that it wasn't chocolate chip. If I knew it was a raisin cookie, I wouldn't have eaten it in the first place.

Actually children don’t like raisins. Nor do adults in that matter. Seriously, whenever I bite into a raisin cookie, I usually have a bad taste of disappointment that it wasn’t chocolate chip. If I knew it was a raisin cookie, I wouldn’t have eaten it in the first place.

16. Have Halloween fun with Skinless Wieners by making your very own Weeny Witch.

Of course, Skinless Wieners alone incites enough shits and giggles, since it's a product you really don't want to Google. Not sure what to think about the Weeny Witch. That's just ridiculous.

Of course, Skinless Wieners alone incites enough shits and giggles, since it’s a product you really don’t want to Google. Not sure what to think about the Weeny Witch. That’s just ridiculous.

17. Wrigley’s Spearmint Gum comes with a bewitching mint leaf flavor.

And I have to admit that between these two guys, the one in the mask is far less terrifying. The other one looks as if he wants to strangle you and play with your insides. Also, what's with the arrows? Don't see the point.

And I have to admit that between these two guys, the one in the mask is far less terrifying. The other one looks as if he wants to strangle you and play with your insides. Also, what’s with the arrows? Don’t see the point.

18. With Jello, the Halloween party fun never seems to stop.

Of course, it doesn't help for this woman that the nieghborhood's kids are all brats. Yeah, good luck with that.

Of course, it doesn’t help for this woman that the nieghborhood’s kids are all brats. Yeah, good luck with that.

19. Staying young the vampire way by drinking a full glass of blood every day.

Of course, with a recommendation like that, a vampire might need to rob a blood bank once in awhile. Still, it's not real blood. Just juice. But yeah, kind of creepy.

Of course, with a recommendation like that, a vampire might need to rob a blood bank once in awhile. Still, it’s not real blood. Just juice. But yeah, kind of creepy.

20. There are fewer tricks when you treat them with Sun Maid raisins.

Once again, most people don't like raisins, especially children. Remember what I said about raisin cookies.

Once again, most people don’t like raisins, especially children. Remember what I said about raisin cookies.

21. With such shades, send monstrous shivers down his spine and make his blood run hot and cold.

I'm sure you don't want to attract guys like these at your Halloween party. Well, Frankenstein's monster is all right. But the vampire might stick his fangs in you.

I’m sure you don’t want to attract guys like these at your Halloween party. Well, Frankenstein’s monster is all right. But the vampire might stick his fangs in you, which wouldn’t be good.

22. There’s nothing on Halloween like carving a pumpkin alongside a nice glass of beer.

Not sure if you should drink alcohol while carving a pumpkin for little Sue. Yeah, I know her dad is overseas but still. Sharp objects and alcohol don't really mix.

Not sure if you should drink alcohol while carving a pumpkin for little Sue. Yeah, I know her dad is overseas but still. Sharp objects and alcohol don’t really mix.

23. Enjoy drinking with an 18th century ghost with Mount Vernon Whiskey.

Then again, if you're sharing a toast with a 18th century ghost, you might what we call,

Then again, if you’re sharing a toast with a 18th century ghost, you might what we call, “drunk.” The ghost might be an hallucination. Of course, it’s been said that George Washington actually drank whiskey for breakfast.

24. Of course, ghosts always love to haunt places that serve Schlitz beer.

Yeah, I can totally see why ghosts would love to haunt bars. I'm sure they can appear as much as they like while patrons who've seen them might wonder whether they had too much to drink. Why go to haunted houses when they can mess up with drunks?

Yeah, I can totally see why ghosts would love to haunt bars. I’m sure they can appear as much as they like while patrons who’ve seen them might wonder whether they had too much to drink. Why go to haunted houses when they can mess up with drunks?

25. With colors by Cutex, bewitch him by day and make him mad for you under the moon.

From what I've learned in horror movies, you really don't want to attract mummies and werewolves (save maybe Remus Lupin). Seriously, ladies, I know how this goes and you will not like it.

From what I’ve learned in horror movies, you really don’t want to attract mummies and werewolves (save Remus Lupin). Seriously, ladies, I know how this goes and you will not like it. I mean these women look like they’re totally asking for it.

26. Get your Ben Cooper Sesame Street costume for Halloween at Plaid Stallions.

For some reason, I don't think Big Bird likes Ernie too much. Seems like Big Bird has a seething hatred for him that he wants to murder him in his sleep.

For some reason, I don’t think Big Bird likes Ernie too much. Seems like Big Bird has a seething hatred for him that he wants to murder him in his sleep.

27. Break tradition this year with Runrico Rumkin.

And I thought that the pumpkin spice craze was new thing. Turns out I was wrong. Seriously, pumpkin flavored vodka? That's ridiculous.

And I thought that the pumpkin spice craze was new thing. Turns out I was wrong. Seriously, pumpkin flavored vodka? That’s ridiculous.

28. Nothing makes families happier on Halloween than good clothes from Kuppenheimer.

From Waylou:

From Waylou: “Something about this whole scene makes me think of Tim Burton’s ‘Batman’ and the scene when the Joker finds out what the chemical plant accident turned him into.”

29. Munching on Milky Ways while trick or treating is always sweet stalkin.’

Yeah, sweet stalkin' really? Is this because it's a stalk munching? Or is it because the one dressed as a stalk is watching the object of their desires get in the shower. If the latter, there might be prison time.

Yeah, sweet stalkin’ really? Is this because it’s a stalk munching? Or is it because the one dressed as a stalk is watching the object of their desires get in the shower. If the latter, there might be prison time.

30. Are your guests upset by the “Ghosts of the Past?”

Of course, if you were that woman, you'd freak out, too, if you looked in the mirror and saw a ghost with an outhouse. In fact, anyone would. Except maybe old people who might musingly think of their childhoods.

Of course, if you were that woman, you’d freak out, too, if you looked in the mirror and saw a ghost with an outhouse. In fact, anyone would. Except maybe old people who might musingly think of their childhoods.

31. Put on a happy face this Halloween by getting Masquerade Makeup at Don Post Studios.

If you don't understand why some people are afraid of clowns, you need to see this. Seriously, that clown is just simply terrifying if you ask me.

If you don’t understand why some people are afraid of clowns, you need to see this. Seriously, that clown is just simply terrifying if you ask me.

32. With Sylvania flash bulbs, it’s easier to flash a picture than ring a doorbell.

Boy, that kid's costume is so creepy. I think the guy should at least not take a picture. Yeah, that might not be a good idea.

Boy, that kid’s costume is so creepy. I think the guy should at least not take a picture. Yeah, that might not be a good idea.

33. For grown up trick or treating, Dutch Masters cigars are no trick and all treat.

“Guess we should get these cigars for all the neighbors next year, assuming that all of them don’t die of lung cancer first.” Seriously, tobacco products kill 1 out of 3 users a year.

34. Morton Salt has the magic touch for Halloween.

Is it just me or does the Morton Salt girl seem to scare the freaking bejesus out of me in this? Seriously, that girl looks so creepy.

Is it just me or does the Morton Salt girl seem to scare the freaking bejesus out of me in this? Seriously, that girl looks so creepy.

35. Gibbs style knit underwear gives only the best for your baby.

I don't think having children flying brooms unsupervised is my idea of aviation safety, let alone in their underwear. Also, I don't think kids typically hang out in their underwear anyway.

I don’t think having children flying brooms unsupervised is my idea of aviation safety, let alone in their underwear. Also, I don’t think kids typically hang out in their underwear anyway.

36. Kellogg’s Snack Pak is sweet Hallow eaten.’

Is it just me or does this little blond boy look really menacing with a mustache and goatee? He just looks incredibly evil with his grin for some reason. I don't know.

Is it just me or does this little blond boy look really menacing with a mustache and goatee? He just looks incredibly evil with his grin for some reason. I don’t know.

37. Treat them to delicious Halloween candies straight from Brach’s.

Seems like this kid is desperate for candy that he'll eat basically anything. Seriously, Brach's makes candy corn which is made from food coloring, sugar, and wax. It's disgusting. Also, I have a bad feeling about that kid.

Seems like this kid is desperate for candy that he’ll eat basically anything. Seriously, Brach’s makes candy corn which is made from food coloring, sugar, and wax. It’s disgusting. Also, I have a bad feeling about that kid.

38. For your Halloween cuisine, grease your pans with Crisco.

From PopSugar:

From PopSugar: “Look, mother! Doesn’t this huge bowl of trans fat look delicious?” I think the Crisco is used for greasing pans while baking. Not food. For God’s sake, lady, get a clue.

39. For this Halloween, go happy with Lucky Strike.

Is this just me or does this woman not seem altogether there? Yeah, I'm sure if her boyfriend cheats on her, she'll probably slit his throat in the dead of night and chop it off into a bunch of tiny bits she'll feed to the sharks.

Is this just me or does this woman not seem altogether there? Yeah, I’m sure if her boyfriend cheats on her, she’ll probably slit his throat in the dead of night and chop it off into a bunch of tiny bits she’ll feed to the sharks.

40. This Halloween, be bright, be light and have a Pepsi.

Because nothing makes you look more fabulous in a skin tight leotard than a major contributor to obesity and Type II Diabetes. Yeah, because nothing helps you lose weight faster than a bunch of empty calories (sarcasm).

Because nothing makes you look more fabulous in a skin tight leotard than a major contributor to obesity and Type II Diabetes. Yeah, because nothing helps you lose weight faster than a bunch of empty calories (sarcasm).

41. Remember that no Halloween mask scares of a man as much as “morning mouth.”

Actually I think waking up next to a pumpkin headed woman might freak out a man more than halitosis. Seriously, would you want to be married to the Headless Horseman? Neither would I.

Actually I think waking up next to a pumpkin headed woman might freak out a man more than halitosis. Seriously, would you want to be married to the Headless Horseman? Neither would I.

42. Don’t let budget troubles scare you with Spun-ls lingerie.

From PopSugar:

From PopSugar: “Oh hey, I’m just using a sharp knife to carve a pumpkin in my underwear.” Seriously, who the hell carves pumpkins in their underwear? That’s crazy! I mean why?

43. Don’t let medical claims scare you from smoking Old Gold.

Well, at least the jack o'lantern knows that smoking is bad for you. But still, the medical claims about smoking being bad for your health, they're pretty legit. Seriously, cigarettes kill people all the time.

Well, at least the jack o’lantern knows that smoking is bad for you. But still, the medical claims about smoking being bad for your health, they’re pretty legit. Seriously, cigarettes kill people all the time.

44. Remember this Halloween sit back and relax with a Coke.

From Waylou:

From Waylou: “Even though we should be focusing on the uplifting Coca Cola message here, the way the couple in the ad look suggests something “dirty” is going on while shooting this one.” Also, I don’t think she looks “relaxing” to me, given the guy’s creepy smile.

45. Remember, America, even the Great Pumpkin is voting for Nixon-Agnew.

Okay, I guess the Great Pumpkin cared more about supporting Richard Nixon and Spiro Agnew than showing up for Linus in the pumpkin patch. Seriously, Great Pumpkin, can't you just show up for Linus for once on Halloween? He really believes in you despite being constantly disappointed by your absence. Don't break his heart.

Okay, I guess the Great Pumpkin cared more about supporting Richard Nixon and Spiro Agnew than showing up for Linus in the pumpkin patch. Seriously, Great Pumpkin, can’t you just show up for Linus for once on Halloween? He really believes in you despite being constantly disappointed by your absence. Don’t break his heart.

46. Make Ted Nugent a part of your Halloween tradition this year.

God, are those kids dressed up as Ted Nugent freak or what? And that's when he was considerably less scary than he is now. Seriously, the guy's on Fox News and is a total gun nut. Really don't want to go to any of his concerts.

God, are those kids dressed up as Ted Nugent freak or what? And that’s when he was considerably less scary than he is now. Seriously, the guy’s on Fox News and is a total gun nut. Really don’t want to go to any of his concerts.

47. Of course, pull off the neatest trick or treat this year with Microsheen shoe polish.

Hey, who knew that sexy Halloween costumes were a new thing? Seriously, this lady puts today's slutty witch to shame. Then again, I may be wrong.

Hey, who knew that sexy Halloween costumes were a new thing? Seriously, this lady puts today’s slutty witch to shame. Then again, I may be wrong.

48. When children see a house that has Brach’s, they will always ring the doorbell.

Actually, children hate Brach's Candy. This is particularly because they sell candy corn, you know inedible Halloween sugar wax.

Actually, children hate Brach’s Candy. This is particularly because they sell candy corn, you know inedible Halloween sugar wax. Also the kid in the cat costume gives me the creeps.

49. Treat your family to a Halloween vegetable beef loaf this year. They’ll love it.

Okay, this looks really disgusting. You know, like the kind of stuff you dog vomits after being freaked out by a ghost. Yeah that.

Okay, this looks really disgusting. You know, like the kind of stuff you dog vomits after being freaked out by a ghost. Yeah that.

50. Buy your trick or treat candy with Brach’s.

And by

And by “candy” we don’t mean a sexy witch on a broom. She’s just posing on this ad to appeal to a male demographic. If you want candy like her, go to a strip club.

51. Crest is here to remind you that tonight’s treats can turn into tomorrow’s tricks.

And this little witch is currently plotting to put her parents into a hot brick oven. Yes, she's about as evil incarnate as they come.

And this little witch is currently plotting to put her parents into a hot brick oven. Yes, she’s about as evil incarnate as they come.

52. No elegant ghost would settle for less than Dan River sheets.

Basically this company is saying:

Basically this company is saying: “Go ahead, use our product for your Halloween ghost costumes. We don’t care if you ruin it.” Something tells me this company was desperate for buyers that year.

53. Take Halloween flash shots and enter into the General Electric picture contest.

Seems that kid really has other things on his mind than just taking pictures. Then again, to him it's an alternative to murder.

Seems that kid really has other things on his mind than just taking pictures. Then again, to him it’s an alternative to murder.

54. Nothing makes better syrup for Halloween breakfast for the Dionne quintuplets than Karo.

Of course, after these kids are done with their waffles, they plan to kill their parents, put them through a wood chipper, and throw their remains in the river. Of course, the real Dionne quints were exploited by their publicity seeking parents by the way.

Of course, after these kids are done with their waffles, they plan to kill their parents, put them through a wood chipper, and throw their remains in the river. Of course, the real Dionne quints were exploited by their publicity seeking parents by the way.

55. You’re never sticking your neck out with a Litronix calculator.

You'd almost think with all the vampire references here, this one was catering to Count von Count. Of course, the Count should've been used in this ad anyway. But the vampire seems to show no interest in the blond just the same.

You’d almost think with all the vampire references here, this one was catering to Count von Count. Of course, the Count should’ve been used in this ad anyway. But the vampire seems to show no interest in the blond just the same.

56. “Show me a filter cigarette that delivers taste and I’ll eat my hat.”

Go ahead. Eating your hat would be much better for your health than smoking a Lucky Strike or any cigarette for that matter. At least eating a hat won't increase your child's chances of suffering an early death from lung cancer.

Go ahead. Eating your hat would be much better for your health than smoking a Lucky Strike or any cigarette for that matter. At least eating a hat won’t increase your child’s chances of suffering an early death from lung cancer.

57. Get all the jack o’lanterns looking at you with Hanes hoisery.

For some reason, jack o'lanterns can be such perverts. One is even looking up that woman's skirt. Yeah, kind of disturbing if you think about it.

For some reason, jack o’lanterns can be such perverts. One is even looking up that woman’s skirt. Yeah, kind of disturbing if you think about it.

58. Karo is a syrup enjoyed by the Dionne Quintuplets on Halloween night.

These were real girls by the way. But by how they're drawn, I wouldn't trust them with a sharp carving knife if I were their parents. I'd be afraid of them killing me in my sleep.

These were real girls by the way. But by how they’re drawn, I wouldn’t trust them with a sharp carving knife if I were their parents. I’d be afraid of them killing me in my sleep.

59. Trick or treat with Roxbury candies, the bargain choice.

I'll keep that in mind, clown of my nightmares. Seriously, that clown looks as though he wants you to buy these candies so he can murder trick or treaters during the night.

I’ll keep that in mind, clown of my nightmares. Seriously, that clown looks as though he wants you to buy these candies so he can murder trick or treaters during the night.

60. Treat your trick or treaters to a box from the Post Treat Pak.

Is it just me, or is this little Frankenstein even creepier without the mask. Yeah, I'm sure a small box of cereal will keep this boy from murdering your cat or setting your house on fire. Not.

Is it just me, or is this little Frankenstein even creepier without the mask. Yeah, I’m sure a small box of cereal will keep this boy from murdering your cat or setting your house on fire. Not.

61. Cracker Jack makes is the perfect trick that makes the perfect treat anytime.

You mean the carmelized popcorn that contains a lousy sticker prize in the box. Yeah, I'm sure (sarcasm). Still, if it keeps the demonic children away the rest of the night, then I have no complaints.

You mean the carmelized popcorn that contains a lousy sticker prize in the box. Yeah, I’m sure (sarcasm). Still, if it keeps the demonic children away the rest of the night, then I have no complaints.

62. Actors’ faces are extra sensitive to shaving cream. That’s why Boris Karloff uses Williams.

Of course, remember don't tell Boris Karloff that he looks like Boris Karloff when he's in Jonathan Brewster mode. Of course, he did originate the role of Jonathan Brewster on Broadway but he wasn't available for the movie. So Canadian Raymond Massey was cast in his role instead.

Of course, remember don’t tell Boris Karloff that he looks like Boris Karloff when he’s in Jonathan Brewster mode (his character in Arsenic and Old Lace hated being compared to Karloff so much that he killed people over it). Of course, he did originate the role of Jonathan Brewster on Broadway but he wasn’t available for the movie. So Canadian Raymond Massey was cast in his role instead.

63. Elvira recommends to cut through paper based CASE products with LBMS.

Of course, sex sells as we know in advertising. Even when it comes to unsexy things like computer and office products. Still, I think Elvira would've made a less ridiculous ad if she appeared one featuring a chainsaw.

Of course, sex sells as we know in advertising. Even when it comes to unsexy things like computer and office products. Still, I think Elvira would’ve made a less ridiculous ad if she appeared one featuring a chainsaw.

64. Olin batteries are great for trick or treaters’ flashlights.

However, they also allow trick or treaters' costumes to appear more visible at night. Sometimes scaring the hell out of the neighbors.

However, they also allow trick or treaters’ costumes to appear more visible at night. Sometimes scaring the hell out of the neighbors.

65. Can’t get enough of peanuts? Have a Pay Day.

And it looks like this guy will probably have to make a run for the store after he's done with this trick or treater. He might also need to get some outdoor cleaning supplies and air freshener as well.

And it looks like this guy will probably have to make a run for the store after he’s done with this trick or treater. He might also need to get some outdoor cleaning supplies and air freshener as well.

66. Refresh yourself this Halloween with the great taste of Coca Cola.

I don't know about you, but I'm wondering whether the little blond boy might be a spawn of Satan. I mean look at him. Never mind that he's trying to get a jack o'lantern to drink pop.

I don’t know about you, but I’m wondering whether the little blond boy might be a spawn of Satan. I mean look at him. Never mind that he’s trying to get a jack o’lantern to drink pop.

67. This Halloween grab a Snickers and you can win $200,000 in their Be Home for Herman contest.

Of course, Herman Munster isn't himself when he's hungry. Believe me, I saw The Munster's Thanksgiving episode when he tried to go on a diet. And he basically broke into a neighbor's house eating everything.

Of course, Herman Munster isn’t himself when he’s hungry. Believe me, I saw The Munster’s Thanksgiving episode when he tried to go on a diet. And he basically broke into a neighbor’s house eating everything.

68. Make Budweiser the beer for your Halloween party this year.

From PopSugar:

From PopSugar: “When was the last time you saw a modern ad with a woman eating cheese and drinking beer? This ad says to me: hey, it’s OK to enjoy the finer and fattier things in life every once in a while!”

69. When you know your beer this Halloween, it’s bound to be Bud.

From PopSugar:

From PopSugar: “When you drink Bud all night, you won’t even need a mask to have a creepy drunk face!” Exactly. After all, your drunk face is probably much scarier. Or will be when it becomes a hangover face.

70. Reddi Whip: The perfect partner in the perfect pumpkin pie.

From PopSugar:

From PopSugar: “Whipped cream: the perfect way to have your kids bouncing off the walls and sticking their heads in pumpkins.” Wonder how that kid’s going to get his head out of this one. Yeah, I think he might need to wait. Mummy’s baking and must not be disturbed.

The Dark Scary World of Vintage Halloween Costumes

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

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During my first Halloween on WordPress in 2013, I did a couple posts on inappropriate Halloween costumes (one for everyone and another one for children). This October I did a post on DIY Halloween costumes and runway fashions that are more appropriate for Halloween in my opinion. This time I’m going with vintage Halloween costumes or what kind of outfits your grandparents wore while they were trick or treating. Now Halloween isn’t a new holiday by any means. I mean it’s one that’s blended with customs pertaining to Celtic pagan and medieval Christian rituals. And people have been dressing up in costumes for parties and trick or treating for ages. Still, when you look at some of these old vintage photos, you get the impression of how bizarre and creepy many of these costumes were. I don’t know if it’s the black and white photography or how costumes were made back then. But the effect is pretty scary and terrifying. Other costumes are just plain weird and some aren’t nearly as wholesome as you’d expect at the time. So without further adieu, here are an assortment of vintage Halloween costumes that might scare the bejesus out of you that you might find a contemporary slasher horror movie less terrifying.

  1. In the olden days, it was suggest that you beware of ghosts within.
On second thought, I'll take my chances with the ghosts. The rabbit in this picture is way more terrifying. Reminds me of those old scary Easter Bunnies I posted about.

On second thought, I’ll take my chances with the ghosts. The rabbit in this picture is way more terrifying. Reminds me of those old scary Easter Bunnies I posted about.

2. Looks like this devil spawn wants some more cake.

Yes, I know that's really a harmless little kid in a devil costume. But the fearsome makeup just makes me squirm.

Yes, I know that’s really a harmless little kid in a devil costume. But the fearsome makeup just makes me squirm.

3. When these kids show up at your doorstep for trick or treat, you better give them candy or else.

Let's just say that five candy bars are a small price to pay to keep them from haunting your dreams. Not so scared of the witch as I am of the clowns and the ones with skull masks.

Let’s just say that five candy bars are a small price to pay to keep them from haunting your dreams. Not so scared of the witch as I am of the clowns and the ones with skull masks.

4. Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce the Fly from the 19th century.

Now this is a costume from 1865. Or so I think. Still, it's a bit too realistic for my taste. Well, except that he's not wearing a mask.

Now this is a costume from 1865. Or so I think. Still, it’s a bit too realistic for my taste. Well, except that he’s not wearing a mask.

5. This little ghost just wants some candy.

So give it out now or it will haunt your door step forever. And unlike what you see in Casper, this ghost does not look friendly at all.

So give it out now or it will haunt your door step forever. And unlike what you see in Casper, this ghost does not look friendly at all.

6. It’s said that rabbits and hedgehogs had to be stylish gentlemen back then.

Now the suits are quite stylish. But the heads are quite freaky. Guess they had furries, too, back in the day.

Now the suits are quite stylish. But the heads are quite freaky. Guess they had furries, too, back in the day.

7. You better not diss this witch.

You really don't want to mess with Broomhilda. Yes, she not be pleasant. But you don't want her to turn you into a newt. Or worse. So fork over the Crunch bar now.

You really don’t want to mess with Broomhilda. Yes, she not be pleasant. But you don’t want her to turn you into a newt. Or worse. So fork over the Crunch bar now.

8. Of course, not every dressed up as monsters, supernatural entities, clowns, or animals for Halloween. This person dressed up as a little girl with pigtails.

Now I know this isn't a kid by any means. However, the toys and smile don't make her less terrifying. Yeah, certainly scares the hell out of me.

Now I know this isn’t a kid by any means. However, the toys and smile don’t make her less terrifying. Yeah, certainly scares the hell out of me.

9. Though women are said to be afraid of spiders, it’s not always the case.

You see, the sexy costume trend isn't as recent as you think. Still, despite this image not being at least PG, spiderwebs are an appropriate Halloween motif.

You see, the sexy costume trend isn’t as recent as you think. Still, despite this image not being at least PG, spiderwebs are an appropriate Halloween motif.

10. Of course, Disney characters were very popular during your grandparents’ childhoods. And people did dress as them for Halloween, too.

Okay, I may not be a fan of Mickey and Minnie (nor Disney cartoons in general). But these two really give me the impression that the old Disneyland was way terrifying than I imagined.

Okay, I may not be a fan of Mickey and Minnie (nor Disney cartoons in general). But these two really give me the impression that the old Disneyland was way terrifying than I imagined.

11. Behold, the original Michelin Tire Man.

And he's smoking a cigar, lovely. Now Michelin was founded in 1889 and the Michelin Man has been around since 1898. So it's probably possible that such Michelin Man costume existed at the time.

And he’s smoking a cigar, lovely. Now Michelin was founded in 1889 and the Michelin Man has been around since 1898. So it’s probably possible that such Michelin Man costume existed at the time.

12. I’d watch it with the skeleton if I were that clown.

Yeah, the skeleton looks pretty terrifying and seems to have something in his hand. Then again, the clown looks pretty freaky, too.

Yeah, the skeleton looks pretty terrifying and seems to have something in his hand. Then again, the clown looks pretty freaky, too.

13. Of course, gnomes were a popular costume choice as well. And I’m sure as hell that they weren’t scary either.

I was wrong. These gnomes are terrifying. Why can't they just look like chubby fat guys with Santa Claus beards? Seriously, it's far less terrifying.

I was wrong. These gnomes are terrifying. Why can’t they just look like chubby fat guys with Santa Claus beards? Seriously, it’s far less terrifying.

14. Like today, sometimes whole families would have their own costume theme.

And I suppose everyone here is dressed like ghosts in order to scar the neighbors. Then again, they were probably very easy to make. But they're just as scary.

And I suppose everyone here is dressed like ghosts in order to scar the neighbors. Then again, they were probably very easy to make. But they’re just as scary.

15. Of course, before there were cars, you couldn’t possibly go trick or treating without your horse. Well, if you had one.

And since they're going as skeletons, the horses should follow suit as well. Still, I think it would be easier for the horses if one of them just went as the Headless Horseman.

And since they’re going as skeletons, the horses should follow suit as well. Still, I think it would be easier for the horses if one of them just went as the Headless Horseman.

16. Beware of the little devil in the babushka.

I would also be careful around the creepy clown, too. Not sure about the other kid in a mask.

I would also be careful around the creepy clown, too. Not sure about the other kid in a mask.

17. When it comes to this couple, the female is deadlier than the male.

And I also get the impression that they went Dutch that year. Man went for the high class Dutch. Woman decided to be a Dutch homicidal housewife.

And I also get the impression that they went Dutch that year. Man went for the high class Dutch. Woman decided to be a Dutch homicidal housewife.

18. Of course, Halloween parties were quite popular. Hope none were incredibly horrifying.

On second thought, I'm kind of relieved that I wasn't around to attend this party. This seems to be a rather terrifying photo op indeed. I guess the competition in the scary costume contest is brutal.

On second thought, I’m kind of relieved that I wasn’t around to attend this party. This seems to be a rather terrifying photo op indeed. I guess the competition in the scary costume contest is brutal.

19. Group costumes were also popular as well. This one is of a bearkeeper, bear, and hunter.

Now we wouldn't have a group costume like that today, just because we don't chain up bears anymore. Still, the bear is quite terrifying and so is the kid.

Now we wouldn’t have a group costume like that today, just because we don’t chain up bears anymore. Still, the bear is quite terrifying and so is the kid.

20. I’d watch my step if I were that cat.

If it knows what evil that clown is capable of, it would know to keep away. Seriously, that clown gives the Joker a run for his money.

If it knows what evil that clown is capable of, it would know to keep away. Seriously, that clown gives the Joker a run for his money.

21. Costume Theme: Where the Wild Things Are as a horror movie.

Okay, these costumes are quite horrifying to say the least. Wouldn't want to take a walk in that forest if you ask me.

Okay, these costumes are quite horrifying to say the least. Wouldn’t want to take a walk in that forest if you ask me.

22. Don’t want to know what this person has up their sleeve.

Let's hope that this person doesn't wear this costume when kids come over for trick or treating. Wait a minute, it was probably made just for the occasion.

Let’s hope that this person doesn’t wear this costume when kids come over for trick or treating. Wait a minute, it was probably made just for the occasion.

23. Halloween parades were said to be quite popular and it was no exception in the olden days.

Strangely, the kid going as Peter Pan is the least terrifying thing in this picture. And he's known for creeping into houses and kidnapping children. Yeah, I don't see any appeal of that story.

Strangely, the kid going as Peter Pan is the least terrifying thing in this picture. And he’s known for creeping into houses and kidnapping children. Yeah, I don’t see any appeal of that story.

24. For Halloween, this woman is going as a Sopwith Camel.

The Sopwith Camel was a British fighter plane during WWI. Don't see any reason why it should be made into a sexy costume. That's just crazy.

The Sopwith Camel was a British fighter plane during WWI. Don’t see any reason why it should be made into a sexy costume. That’s just crazy.

25. Say cheese, and don’t mind the black shadowy figure behind you.

After this picture was taken, the children in the foreground were never seen again. This was no surprise as you see how the Grim Reaper decided to pose with them for Halloween.

After this picture was taken, the children in the foreground were never seen again. This was no surprise as you see how the Grim Reaper decided to pose with them for Halloween.

26. Guess C-3PO has seen better days.

Yeah, I know it's supposed to be an alien and the picture was taken before Star Wars. But still, the person really looks like a ragged C-3PO.

Yeah, I know it’s supposed to be an alien and the picture was taken before Star Wars. But still, the person really looks like a ragged C-3PO.

27. Back in the day, nothing won a costume contest than dressing up as a pig’s insides.

This was for a fancy dress ball in London, which took place in April. But it would've been better if he wore it on Halloween. He even designed it himself. What a sick and demented man.

This was for a fancy dress ball in London, which took place in April. But it would’ve been better if he wore it on Halloween. He even designed it himself. What a sick and demented man.

28. Of course, a spider web dress was seen as the height of 1920s Halloween fashion.

This is the 1920s silent film actress, Louise Brooks. She's best known for playing Lulu in the 1929 Pandora's Box. Her best known moves were heavily censored. She didn't last in movies for long.

This is the 1920s silent film actress, Louise Brooks. She’s best known for playing Lulu in the 1929 Pandora’s Box. Her best known moves were heavily censored. She didn’t last in movies for long.

29. Who’s afraid of the big bad wolf?

Somehow, I don't feel that this dog is doomed for a bad end. I'm sure the wolf is bound to make it his dinner. Just have a feeling.

Somehow, I don’t feel that this dog is doomed for a bad end. I’m sure the wolf is bound to make it his dinner. Just have a feeling.

30. “For Christ’s sake, who are you calling chicken?”

Now that's the most realistic rooster costume I've ever seen. Guess this was for a costume contest. Still, looks like someone you don't want to mess with.

Now that’s the most realistic rooster costume I’ve ever seen. Guess this was for a costume contest. Still, looks like someone you don’t want to mess with.

31. Of course, witches are known to show great hospitality to trick or treaters.

The fact some trick or treaters are never seen again has nothing to do with it. After all, why would an old lady like that would want to prey on children? You think she might put them in a cauldron or oven.

The fact some trick or treaters are never seen again has nothing to do with it. After all, why would an old lady like that would want to prey on children? You think she might put them in a cauldron or oven.

32. It’s said that some skeleton ladies were known to be quite stylish back in the turn of the century.

Of course, they intended to make a grand entrance to the Halloween party. Didn't mean to terrify anyone in the process.

Of course, they intended to make a grand entrance to the Halloween party. Didn’t mean to terrify anyone in the process.

33. Let’s hope these adventurers don’t mind the dancing skeleton in the background.

I don't know about you but that skeleton is very terrifying to say the least. Maybe it's the photography but I'm not sure.

I don’t know about you but that skeleton is very terrifying to say the least. Maybe it’s the photography but I’m not sure.

34. Seems like she has found herself between a goat man and a satyr.

Let's just say, I'm not sure which guy is more terrifying. Also, that's a very skimpy and unflattering satyr costume if you ask me.

Let’s just say, I’m not sure which guy is more terrifying. Also, that’s a very skimpy and unflattering satyr costume if you ask me.

35. When making Halloween costumes, sometimes you have to go with what you got.

Guess these two are either space aliens or inspectors at some nuclear power plant. Not sure which.

Guess these two are either space aliens or inspectors at some nuclear power plant. Not sure which. Probably the former.

36. Sometimes wearing a mask can change your whole personality.

Strange that the least scary kid in this is the one with devil horns. The girl in the donkey head is particularly terrifying to say the least. The ones in masks aren't much better.

Strange that the least scary kid in this is the one with devil horns. The girl in the donkey head is particularly terrifying to say the least. The ones in masks aren’t much better.

37. Sometimes sibling Halloween pictures are adorable, especially when the kids are young. Not sure about this one.

Okay, seems like these two kids have succeeded in haunting my dreams. Seriously, what was it about the creepy masks?

Okay, seems like these two kids have succeeded in haunting my dreams. Seriously, what was it about the creepy masks?

38. Yes, a masked jester can be quite terrifying to say the least. Best keep the mask off.

On second thought, he might want to keep the mask on since he's pretty terrifying without it. What was I thinking?

On second thought, he might want to keep the mask on since he’s pretty terrifying without it. What was I thinking?

39. “Hello, we want to play with you.”

I know the kids are real little in this. But still, their costumes are simply terrifying beyond all reason. Maybe it's the masks. Maybe not.

I know the kids are real little in this. But still, their costumes are simply terrifying beyond all reason. Maybe it’s the masks. Maybe not.

40. May I present to you, Castle Tower Man.

Wonder if this was a rejected character from Beauty and the Beast. Sure seems like it. Then again, it's a pretty crazy costume if you ask me.

Wonder if this was a rejected character from Beauty and the Beast. Sure seems like it. Then again, it’s a pretty crazy costume if you ask me.

41. Of course, you should know better than to cross the pig butcher.

Looks like this porker is through with bringing the bacon at the expense of his fellow swine. What I wonder is why this pig thought being a butcher was a good career path in the first place.

Looks like this porker is through with bringing the bacon at the expense of his fellow swine. What I wonder is why this pig thought being a butcher was a good career path in the first place.

42. Is this kid supposed to be a hobo clown? Wait, I may not want to know.

Now that's pretty terrifying to say the least. Makes me want to go pale and run away in fear.

Now that’s pretty terrifying to say the least. Makes me want to go pale and run away in fear.

43. “All hail the powerful Pumpkin king.”

I'm sure what they're doing here is harmless and nothing to be afraid of. Honestly, I'm sure it's not some type of evil spirit worship. Then again, you might want to run.

I’m sure what they’re doing here is harmless and nothing to be afraid of. Honestly, I’m sure it’s not some type of evil spirit worship. Then again, you might want to run.

44. This clown really wants you to give him candy.

And no, you really don't want to see him in the moonlight. As Lon Chaney says, "A clown is never funny in the moonlight." He had a point.

And no, you really don’t want to see him in the moonlight. As Lon Chaney says, “A clown is never funny in the moonlight.” He had a point.

45. Hey, look, a scarecrow family. Sure they’re just as rustic as all the scarecrows you see in fields.

Actually I was wrong. These scarecrows can really scare crows and other creatures. Hell, they can scare the hell out of people like me.

Actually I was wrong. These scarecrows can really scare crows and other creatures. Hell, they can scare the hell out of people like me.

46. Now she’s just a little girl in the pumpkin patch. Hope there’s nothing scary to see here.

Okay, this little girl is creepy as hell. I mean just look at her face. Really something that gives people nightmares.

Okay, this little girl is creepy as hell. I mean just look at her face. Really something that gives people nightmares.

47. Didn’t know that the Prince of Darkness had his own office in Hell.

Then again, it seems likely that Satan is a top executive in some major hedge fund company on Wall Street. Not sure why. Then again, the place is filled with scum and villainy that never get prosecuted or put in jail.

Then again, it seems likely that Satan is a top executive in some major hedge fund company on Wall Street. Not sure why. Then again, the place is filled with scum and villainy that never get prosecuted or put in jail.

48. Of course, in the olden days, we have to be aware that some people dressed up as racist caricatures.

Yes, many of these costumes are terrifying. But if you're black and/or Native American, only the clown and witch won't offend you. Also, I think the Indian princess might work for the Washington Redskins or Cleveland Indians.

Yes, many of these costumes are terrifying. But if you’re black and/or Native American, only the clown and witch won’t offend you. Also, I think the Indian princess might work for the Washington Redskins or Cleveland Indians.

49. Seems like we have a dangerous psycho killing horror villain on the loose.

Yes, he does kind of remind me of some slasher horror movie villain for some reason. Hope he just says out of my town. Guess there might be people in his neighborhood who won't see the light of day when he's through with them.

Yes, he does kind of remind me of some slasher horror movie villain for some reason. Hope he just says out of my town. Guess there might be people in his neighborhood who won’t see the light of day when he’s through with them.

50. I see the skeleton preferred to come in a nightgown this time.

Talk about creepy as hell. Still, I'm sure the third one in this picture is bound to offend some people of color. Not sure what the other two women are, not that I want to know.

Talk about creepy as hell. Still, I’m sure the third one in this picture is bound to offend some people of color. Not sure what the other two women are, not that I want to know.

51. Nothing is more creepy on Halloween than seeing a little kid with a head like this.

Now that costume is bound to win the Scariest Costume Award at the Halloween kiddie party. Of course, it's sure to scare the living shit out of everyone. I'm sure it this child will make playmates wet their pants or beds.

Now that costume is bound to win the Scariest Costume Award at the Halloween kiddie party. Of course, it’s sure to scare the living shit out of everyone. I’m sure it this child will make playmates wet their pants or beds.

52. Sometimes a tune won’t let the old goat down.

Don't usually think goats as scary. But this one looks horrifying enough to haunt my dreams. And no, I really don't want to hear any tunes from that horn.

Don’t usually think goats as scary. But this one looks horrifying enough to haunt my dreams. And no, I really don’t want to hear any tunes from that horn.

53. Remember that some ghouls might walk the street in quite stylish attire.

For some reason, this guy reminds me of Jim Carrey's character from The Mask. Well, if he gained a few pounds anyway. Also bears some resemblance to a character from Ghostbusters.

For some reason, this guy reminds me of Jim Carrey’s character from The Mask. Well, if he gained a few pounds anyway. Also bears some resemblance to a character from Ghostbusters.

54. Here we have a clown with a couple of dolls. Hope nothing goes wrong with that.

Is it just me or are these people seem like they can kill you in their sleep in the middle of the night? Just a thought.

Is it just me or are these people seem like they can kill you in their sleep in the middle of the night? Just a thought.

55. Always remember to put on your best face this Halloween season.

Now I've seen people in sexy and scantily clad costumes before. But this is just ridiculous and terrifying at the same time. Seriously, this is something you'd see on a very bad acid trip.

Now I’ve seen people in sexy and scantily clad costumes before. But this is just ridiculous and terrifying at the same time. Seriously, this is something you’d see on a very bad acid trip.

56. For some reason, giant eyes scare me. Not sure why.

Okay, I can see why this time. Yeah, eye heads really can be terrifying. This is especially in black and white photography.

Okay, I can see why this time. Yeah, eye heads really can be terrifying. This is especially in black and white photography.

57. Oh, look, the astronaut kid wants you to hold his jack o’lantern.

On second thought, thanks but no thanks. Yeah, I know this isn't supposed to be a scary costume. But the kid creeps me out just the same.

On second thought, thanks but no thanks. Yeah, I know this isn’t supposed to be a scary costume. But the kid creeps me out just the same.

58. Don’t make the Devil get his pronged fork out. I’m just saying.

Now I know devil is a popular costume choice. But it seems that a lot of these vintage devils can sure scare the hell out of you.

Now I know devil is a popular costume choice. But it seems that a lot of these vintage devils can sure scare the hell out of you.

59. Now this witch may fly with a broom but her preferred ground transport is bicycle.

Yeah, really don't want to see her riding around during the night. Still, at least she can't kidnap children with it. If she wanted to, she should've bought a windowless van.

Yeah, really don’t want to see her riding around during the night. Still, at least she can’t kidnap children with it. If she wanted to, she should’ve bought a windowless van.

60. This Halloween, this group decided to go as a Texas couple with two oil derricks.

Is it just me or do I find the idea of oil derrick costumes a bit too strange? Then again, it must be the arms sticking out of the derricks that's disturbing.

Is it just me or do I find the idea of oil derrick costumes a bit too strange? Then again, it must be the arms sticking out of the derricks that’s disturbing.

61. Now I’m sure this circus clown is up to no good.

After all, what circus clown doesn't have the face of Rip Taylor? Like all of them.

After all, what circus clown doesn’t have the face of Rip Taylor? Like all of them.

62. Sure this bug can fly but he would rather ride his bike in the countryside.

Now this would be the beginning of a terrific horror movie. I'm sure this guy would be the one who kills most of the characters.

Now this would be the beginning of a terrific horror movie. I’m sure this guy would be the one who kills most of the characters.

63. Sure a bunny can be a popular but not scary costume for kids this Halloween.

On second thought, I was wrong. In fact, those rabbit ears look suspiciously like devil horns. Looks like this is a job for the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. But since you must likely don't have it, run away. Run away!

On second thought, I was wrong. In fact, those rabbit ears look suspiciously like devil horns. Looks like this is a job for the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. But since you must likely don’t have it, run away. Run away!

64. Clowns are also popular kid costumes as well. Little kids always look so cute in ruffles and a pointy clown hat.

Sorry, but I think your granma's creepy old dolls have just come back to life. You might want to evacuate the premises for your own good. Yeah, you'll have nightmares but nothing you can do about that.

Sorry, but I think your granma’s creepy old dolls have just come back to life. You might want to evacuate the premises for your own good. Yeah, you’ll have nightmares but nothing you can do about that.

65. “Okay, folks, seems like the gang’s all here.”

"Now let us all just take one picture of ourselves before we go out sucking the souls out of people. We want to remember this occasion, don't we?"

“Now let us all just take one picture of ourselves before we go out sucking the souls out of people. We want to remember this occasion, don’t we?”

66. Hey, did I just see a ghost?

Yeah, sometimes the heavy urban pollution can make some people look scarier than they appear. The kid in a ghost costume is one of them.

Yeah, sometimes the heavy urban pollution can make some people look scarier than they appear. The kid in a ghost costume is one of them.

67. Of course, when it comes to scaring the crap out of people, always start them while they’re young.

From Huffington Post: "What if we told you this wasn't a costume? And that this baby is in your house? And you're in a Spanish horror film?"

From Huffington Post: “What if we told you this wasn’t a costume? And that this baby is in your house? And you’re in a Spanish horror film?”

68. Say hello to the pumpkinhead girl and her friend.

Actually I really don't. Now I don't find jack o'lanterns particularly scary. But this one is utterly terrifying for some reason.

Actually I really don’t. Now I don’t find jack o’lanterns particularly scary. But this one is utterly terrifying for some reason.

69. A Japanese scarecrow? Never seen that before.

Man, didn't know that could actually scare crows, critters, and people. Certainly don't want to see that wandering the streets at night.

Man, didn’t know that could actually scare crows, critters, and people. Certainly don’t want to see that wandering the streets at night.

70. Didn’t know that anteaters could be so romantic.

Okay, this picture sure won't make me look at anteaters the same way again. Are you sure these guys eat ants? Because these two are certainly bound to scare me to death.

Okay, this picture sure won’t make me look at anteaters the same way again. Are you sure these guys eat ants? Because these two are certainly bound to scare me to death.

71. Of course, fairies are a popular Halloween costume that’s not scary. At least I hope so.

Now I really don't want to mess with these two. Yeah, the masks really makes them seem quite menacing and real terrors in their own right.

Now I really don’t want to mess with these two. Yeah, the masks really makes them seem quite menacing and real terrors in their own right.

72. “I told you we should’ve done Alice in Wonderland this year.”

Now that gnome is as creepy as hell. The women dressed as mushrooms is just freaky. Sure this wasn't a hallucinogenic drug trip? Because it sure looks like it.

Now that gnome is as creepy as hell. The women dressed as mushrooms is just freaky. Sure this wasn’t a hallucinogenic drug trip? Because it sure looks like it.

73. Seems like this little pumpkin is excited to go trick or treating.

Now this is freaky if you ask me and sure to scare the hell out of me. Then again, this might be just the black and white photography here.

Now this is freaky if you ask me and sure to scare the hell out of me. Then again, this might be just the black and white photography here.

74. Of course, sometimes it pays to be original in regards to Halloween costumes.

Now this woman is supposed to be lettuce. Yes, lettuce. However, she more or less looks like you'd expect to marry the Jolly Green Giant. Then again, I'm not sure if he'd approve of that outfit.

Now this woman is supposed to be lettuce. Yes, lettuce. However, she more or less looks like you’d expect to marry the Jolly Green Giant. Then again, I’m not sure if he’d approve of that outfit.

75. “Let’s be phones for Halloween by taking a couple old ones and putting it on our heads.”

Don't pictures like these make you glad that we have cell phones today. Because these look quite freaky. Yeah, that can't be good.

Don’t pictures like these make you glad that we have cell phones today. Because these look quite freaky. Yeah, that can’t be good.

76. Didn’t know a long shawl can make a great ghost costume.

Seems quite simple and scary but it works. Let's hope she can see through it though. And that she doesn't spill anything.

Seems quite simple and scary but it works. Let’s hope she can see through it though. And that she doesn’t spill anything.

77. Looks like this boy’s parents are going out for a party.

And I'm sure this photo will make him always remember what to tell his therapist some years down the line. Yeah, that kid is certainly screwed up for life.

And I’m sure this photo will make him always remember what to tell his therapist some years down the line. Yeah, that kid is certainly screwed up for life.

78. Guess all horror movie villains always have to start small.

And I'm sure this little boy will grow up killing and scaring a lot of teenagers some day. Yeah, just you wait until he becomes a holy terror.

And I’m sure this little boy will grow up killing and scaring a lot of teenagers some day. Yeah, just you wait until he becomes a holy terror.

79. “Come along here, little children. Come get some candy. I won’t bite.”

Okay, kids, you might want to stay the hell away from this person. You don't want to be put in a brew, oven, fireplace, or worse.

Okay, kids, you might want to stay the hell away from this person. You don’t want to be put in a brew, oven, fireplace, windowless van, or worse.

80. These people prefer to haunt more high class Halloween parties.

Now the guy certainly has a real vibe I'd identify with the Joker. However, I think the woman is more likely to scare the living hell out of me. Must be the mask.

Now the guy certainly has a real vibe I’d identify with the Joker. However, I think the woman is more likely to scare the living hell out of me. Must be the menacing mask.

Halloween Costumes Straight from the Runway

Posted by historymaniacmegan on

I’m not a big fan of the fashion industry. For me, it revolves around designers selling overpriced clothes made from sweatshop workers in South Asia so they can design clothes that nobody would want to be caught dead in. I mean seriously, who the hell is going to wear the stuff you see on the runway during Fashion Week. Seriously, what these models wear on the runway is simply ridiculous that you’d have to be crazy to wear such clothes on the street. Now I understand the need for designers to express themselves but c’mon, the whole point of fashion is to design clothes for people to wear. The stuff you see on the runway nowadays just makes the fashion industry a joke. The designer label clothes cost too much and are too impractical for normal people to wear. And don’t even get me started on body image and women. Besides, when it comes to buying clothes, I really don’t give a shit about the designer or brand. Designer labels have no relevance on my life. I just care whether it comes cheap and whether it’ll last me a long time. And I can care less whether any designer brand items I own are knockoffs or not. Not to mention, I’ve known quite well that higher prices don’t mean better quality products. Just look at a Consumer Reports manual on cars. Last year, I had this idea of using runway fashions as Halloween costumes but for various undisclosed reasons, I didn’t go through with it. However, this year things are different since I already did a post on costumes and my Halloween posts haven’t done as good as I thought, save the one on pumpkin dioramas. That one did better than I expected. Still, we can spend this October having a little fun with high fashion by seeing them as inspirations for Halloween costumes. Here are some Halloween worthy runway fashions you might not want to miss. Costume names will be subject to my observations.

  1. The feline dominatrix from the anime version of Cats
Of course, she wasn't allowed to bring her cat o' nine tails and handcuffs with her. Yeah, runway policy is strict about these things.

Of course, she wasn’t allowed to bring her cat o’ nine tails and handcuffs with her. Yeah, runway policy is strict about these things.

2. The Mad Hatter on Casual Friday

Now the top is fine and something I can actually wear. Not sure about the bottom though. But still, looks like something you can picture the Mad Hatter wearing on his day off.

Now the top is fine and something I can actually wear. Not sure about the bottom though. But still, looks like something you can picture the Mad Hatter wearing on his day off.

3. Vibrator/Video Game Console

Yeah, having an outfit resembling male genitalia won't get my mind out of the gutter on this one. Seriously, I think whoever designed this must have a substance abuse problem.

Yeah, having an outfit resembling male genitalia won’t get my mind out of the gutter on this one. Seriously, I think whoever designed this must have a substance abuse problem.

4. Escaped inmate from a mental hospital

Let's just say the straitjacket is really not a good sign about her personality. Seriously, she's likely to be dangerously insane as far as we know.

Let’s just say the straitjacket is really not a good sign about her personality. Seriously, she’s likely to be dangerously insane as far as we know.

5. Pencil

Sure hate to know the effectiveness of that eraser. Still, she looks more like a No. 2 from the waist down.

Sure hate to know the effectiveness of that eraser. Still, she looks more like a No. 2 from the waist down.

6. Renaissance Painting

Wonder what artist she's wearing. You'd think she'd go with the easy choices like Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael, or Donatello. I mean those guys have Ninja Turtles named after them.

Wonder what artist she’s wearing. You’d think she’d go with the easy choices like Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael, or Donatello. I mean those guys have Ninja Turtles named after them.

7. Fancy feather duster

For only dusting the finest shelves and china thank you very much. Still, not sure if I like this costume set up.

For only dusting the finest shelves and china thank you very much. Still, not sure if I like this costume set up.

8. Emojis

Of course, she has a face for every look. But if you want to know how she really feels, just check her social media.

Of course, she has a face for every look. But if you want to know how she really feels, just check her social media.

9. Lion

For some reason, this doesn't remind me of the ferocious king of the savannah. Also, I'm sure lions aren't black. But I see you have to go with what you have.

For some reason, this doesn’t remind me of the ferocious king of the savannah. Also, I’m sure lions aren’t black. But I see you have to go with what you have.

10. Pink, fluffy cloud

Now this looks exactly as I see it. Guess this outfit was video game inspired, perhaps in the Nintendo fashion.

Now this looks exactly as I see it. Guess this outfit was video game inspired, perhaps in the Nintendo fashion.

11. Clothes Frankenstein

Because it looks like she stitched that skirt up from a bunch of pieces in the dumpster. Not sure about the jacket.

Because it looks like she stitched that skirt up from a bunch of pieces in the dumpster. Not sure about the jacket.

12. Rapunzel

Apparently, Rapunzel liked to experiment with her ridiculously long hair. Well, at least before her prince wanted her to let down her hair.

Apparently, Rapunzel liked to experiment with her ridiculously long hair. Well, at least before her prince wanted her to let down her hair.

13. Snakes having sex

If you want to know how snakes have sex, this is only a mild representation. But if you see any photos, it's exactly a bunch of males getting on top of each other in order to mate with a female.

If you want to know how snakes have sex, this is only a mild representation. But if you see any photos, it’s exactly a bunch of males getting on top of each other in order to mate with a female.

14. WWE character reject

Apparently this guy was too outrageous for professional studio wrestling. Then again, studio wrestling's fake as they say.

Apparently this guy was too outrageous for professional studio wrestling. Then again, studio wrestling’s fake as they say.

15. Knight of Ni in the rain

Seems like he'll wait for a shrubbery for as long as it takes. Oh, I forgot they don't like the word

Seems like he’ll wait for a shrubbery for as long as it takes. Oh, I forgot they don’t like the word “it.” Still, didn’t know they had plastic ponchos in the Middle Ages.

16. Brooklyn lady knight

Too bad the Brooklyn Nets no longer have the knight. Because I think she would've made a great companion mascot for him.

Too bad the Brooklyn Nets no longer have the knight. Because I think she would’ve made a great companion mascot for him.

17. The “one size fits all shirt”

You know those shirt you might see at a store that stretch a lot? This is what her outfit reminds me of for some reason.

You know those shirt you might see at a store that stretch a lot? This is what her outfit reminds me of for some reason.

18. Major Tom from David Bowie’s “Space Oddity”

If they made music videos in the 1970s like they do now, I can imagine someone in the

If they made music videos in the 1970s like they do now, I can imagine someone in the “Space Oddity” one wearing an outfit like this. I mean that looks very much Ziggy Stardust era if you ask me.

19. Grumpy Sun

Just because she's the sun doesn't mean she's all rainbows and sunshine. Also what the hell did she do to her lips?

Just because she’s the sun doesn’t mean she’s all rainbows and sunshine. Also what the hell did she do to her lips?

20. Mesoamerican Christmas tree

So they didn't celebrate Christmas in Pre-Columbian Mesoamerica. But c'mon, if they did, I'm sure you'd see trees like this in their paintings.

So they didn’t celebrate Christmas in Pre-Columbian Mesoamerica. But c’mon, if they did, I’m sure you’d see trees like this in their paintings.

21. Modestly dressed Lady Gaga

Then again, almost any of these costumes can be of Lady Gaga in one variation or another. Of course, seeing Lady Gaga in this makes her look normal in comparison to the other stuff she's worn.

Then again, almost any of these costumes can be of Lady Gaga in one variation or another. Of course, seeing Lady Gaga in this makes her look normal in comparison to the other stuff she’s worn.

22. Justin Bieber

Just because. Seriously, Bieber did model underwear for Calvin Klein. And he's an obnoxious brat.

Just because. Seriously, Bieber did model underwear for Calvin Klein. And he’s an obnoxious brat.

23. Ancient Chinese road worker

For one, because his outfit has Chinese symbols and is in that style. Second, because it's bright yellow and orange kind akin to what PennDOT workers wear.

For one, because his outfit has Chinese symbols and is in that style. Second, because it’s bright yellow and orange kind akin to what PennDOT workers wear.

24. African insect goddess

Because I'm not sure what else this reminds me of. Besides, deities can look like just about anything.

Because I’m not sure what else this reminds me of. Besides, deities can look like just about anything.

25. Frog lady

Hmm..using Kermit for a top. Now as a muppet fan, that ain't right. Seriously, why?

Hmm..using Kermit for a top. Now as a muppet fan, that ain’t right. Seriously, why?

26. Rainbow

Seems like her outfit doesn't have the first 3 colors in sequence. Shouldn't they be red, orange, and yellow?

Seems like her outfit doesn’t have the first 3 colors in sequence. Shouldn’t they be red, orange, and yellow?

27. 1980s sci-fi villain

Yeah, kind of reminds me of that. Then again, he might also pass for a 1980s sci fi villain as well.

Yeah, kind of reminds me of that. I mean 1980s sci fi outfits tend to be incredibly ridiculous for some reason. Don’t ask me.

28. Accordion pants

Of course, his pants just look like you can use them in an accordion. They also make him look like an idiot.

Of course, his pants just look like you can use them in an accordion. They also make him look like an idiot.

29. Castaway

Now I don't mean Tom Hanks's character from a movie when he's stranded on the deserted island. I mean someone actually stranded on a deserted island. Then again, I'm not sure about the striped pants.

Now I don’t mean Tom Hanks’s character from a movie when he’s stranded on the deserted island. I mean someone actually stranded on a deserted island. Then again, I’m not sure about the striped pants.

30. Shower curtain balloon

If that were white, I'd swear she'd be a runway version of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. Still, you can tell she totally doesn't want to wear the thing.

If that were white, I’d swear she’d be a runway version of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. Still, you can tell she totally doesn’t want to wear the thing.

31. High couture Marge Simpson

Basically this is what Marge Simpson would look like if she changed her style and dyed her hair. Yeah, not much different.

Basically this is what Marge Simpson would look like if she changed her style and dyed her hair. Yeah, not much different.

32. Futuristic bunny rabbit

Because the head looks just like a bunny head. Not sure about the hand things though. Doesn't make any sense.

Because the head looks just like a bunny head. Not sure about the hand things though. Doesn’t make any sense.

33. High couture circus clown

Because she needs to make the audience laugh while in style. Yes, clowns care about fashion, too, you know.

Because she needs to make the audience laugh while in style. Yes, clowns care about fashion, too, you know.

34. Chic Aztec god

Because this is what the guy's outfit reminds me of, especially around the mouth. Seems like he's hungry for some human sacrifice.

Because this is what the guy’s outfit reminds me of, especially around the mouth. Seems like he’s hungry for some human sacrifice.

35. NFL linebacker at a golf course

Odd that he doesn't have his clubs with him. Then again, I'm sure NFL linebackers don't dress this way on the golf course. I just think it's funny.

Odd that he doesn’t have his clubs with him. Then again, I’m sure NFL linebackers don’t dress this way on the golf course. I just think it’s funny.

36. Goat lady

Or as my dad calls it, "a representation of Stevie Nicks." Of course, she does sound like a goat.

Or as my dad calls it, “a representation of Stevie Nicks.” Of course, she does sound like a goat.

37. Knit freak with a death wish

From what his shirt says, this guy must have major issues. Then again, the outfit is pretty ridiculous.

From what his shirt says, this guy must have major issues. Then again, the outfit is pretty ridiculous.

38. Alaskan dog sledder

Please don't be a piece of cultural appropriation. Because it sure looks like it from the animal skins. Then again, he could just as well be Norwegian polar explorer Roald Admundsen, who was the first guy to reach the South Pole and sail the Northwest Passage.

Please don’t be a piece of cultural appropriation. Because it sure looks like it from the animal skins. Then again, he could just as well be Norwegian polar explorer Roald Admundsen, who was the first guy to reach the South Pole and sail the Northwest Passage.

39. Slasher horror movie villain on a date

What's surprising to me is how movie psycho killers seem to have horrible fashion sense. But don't tell him that.

What’s surprising to me is how movie psycho killers seem to have horrible fashion sense. But don’t tell him that.

40. All-seeing eye

Now this is freaky like from some sci-fi movie. But I assure it would make a great Halloween costume.

Now this is freaky like from some sci-fi movie. But I assure it would make a great Halloween costume.

41. Confetti

Just a guy with tape all over him. But it looks like confetti to me. Yes, I don't get why this was at a fashion show.

Just a guy with tape all over him. But it looks like confetti to me. Yes, I don’t get why this was at a fashion show.

42. Crazy cat man

You heard of the crazy cat lady right? Well, I think this guy makes her look normal.

You heard of the crazy cat lady right? Well, I think this guy makes her look normal.

43. Tidal wave

Wouldn't want to surf on that. Can't even see that person's face. Still, wonder how she could move around in that.

Wouldn’t want to surf on that. Can’t even see that person’s face. Still, wonder how she could move around in that.

44. Ancient warrior from Las Vegas

My apologies to any Native Americans living in Las Vegas because I don't mean to insult your native culture. But still, the guy is wearing a hat you'd see on a Vegas showgirl and he's certainly in warrior apparel. Just can't ignore that.

My apologies to any Native Americans living in Las Vegas because I don’t mean to insult your native culture. But still, the guy is wearing a hat you’d see on a Vegas showgirl and he’s certainly in warrior apparel. Just can’t ignore that.

45. Houndsooth

Yes, this is the pattern you wear for business apparel. And she has it all over her. Kind of overdoing it if you ask me.

Yes, this is the pattern you wear for business apparel. And she has it all over her. Kind of overdoing it if you ask me.

46. Migrant farm worker

Now this looks pretty bad here and it's pretty insulting to the farm workers who help feed our country for God's sake. Then again, this pretty much reflects what Donald Trump thinks about Mexicans.

Now this looks pretty bad here and it’s pretty insulting to the farm workers who help feed our country for God’s sake. Then again, this pretty much reflects what Donald Trump thinks about Mexicans. Best to loose the trash bag dress.

47. Designer handbag

Well, at least she went with a more low key approach. Still, that hat is hideous.

Well, at least she went with a more low key approach. Still, that hat is hideous.

48. Mexican at a disco

C'mon, she's wearing a sombrero and a shiny outfit. What else could you expect?

C’mon, she’s wearing a sombrero and a shiny outfit. What else could you expect?

49. Chest of drawers

Now this actually looks doable compared to the others. Ridiculous but doable. Still, reminds me of furniture.

Now this actually looks doable compared to the others. Ridiculous but doable. Still, reminds me of furniture.

50. Radiohead

I mean she has a bunch of speakers on her head. So the name fits. Yes, it's very ridiculous but it's funny.

I mean she has a bunch of speakers on her head. So the name fits. Yes, it’s very ridiculous but it’s funny.

51. Blond Bigfoot

Almost considered calling it, "Blond Chewbacca" but I didn't want to insult any Star Wars fans. Nor did I want to offend Dr. Seuss fans either. But Sasquatch hunters are fair game.

Almost considered calling it, “Blond Chewbacca” but I didn’t want to insult any Star Wars fans. Nor did I want to offend Dr. Seuss fans either. But Sasquatch hunters are fair game.

52. Breakfast

Now this one speaks for itself. Her dress has a couple of eggs over easy and her hair is done like bacon strips.

Now this one speaks for itself. Her dress has a couple of eggs over easy and her hair is done like bacon strips.

53. Newest member of Daft Punk

Yeah, I'm sure I know why she's in the group. And I don't think it's because of her musical talent either.

Yeah, I’m sure I know why she’s in the group. And I don’t think it’s because of her musical talent either.

54. Hardcore Raver

Now that's not a very appropriate trick or treating costume. Guess you might want to aim for modesty and go as Slave Leia.

Now that’s not a very appropriate trick or treating costume. Guess you might want to aim for modesty and go as Slave Leia.

55. Champion polo player from the dead

Guess she shows us that polo was a lady's game in the 18th century. How she was able to play in that dress, I don't have the slightest idea.

Guess she shows us that polo was a lady’s game in the 18th century. How she was able to play in that dress, I don’t have the slightest idea.

56. Pineapple head

Now that definitely looks like a pineapple head. Still, her outfit would've been totally fine without it.

Now that definitely looks like a pineapple head. Still, her outfit would’ve been totally fine without it.

57. Frankenstein’s wife

Guess they're referring to Dr. Frankenstein's wife here. The monster's mate 's costume is probably much cooler. I mean have you ever seen Bride of Frankenstein?

Guess they’re referring to Dr. Frankenstein’s wife here. The monster’s mate ‘s costume is probably much cooler. I mean have you ever seen Bride of Frankenstein?

58. Effie Trinket from The Hunger Games

Or Effie Trinket if she appeared in a Dr. Seuss story. Then again, a lot of these outfits could be in Effie's wardrobe.

Or Effie Trinket if she appeared in a Dr. Seuss story. Then again, a lot of these outfits could be in Effie’s wardrobe.

59. Killer Queen

"She's a Killer Queen/Gunpowder, gelatine/Dynamite with a laser beam/Guaranteed to blow your mind/Anytime..."

“She’s a Killer Queen/Gunpowder, gelatine/Dynamite with a laser beam/Guaranteed to blow your mind/Anytime…”

60. Flock of doves

Wonder how many dead doves it took to make this dress? More than I want to know, I guess.

Wonder how many dead doves it took to make this dress? More than I want to know, I guess.

61. Anaconda

Yeah, she kind of does look like she's wearing a skimpy snakeskin outfit. Yes, it's pretty ridiculous and certain to earn the ire of PETA.

Yeah, she kind of does look like she’s wearing a skimpy snakeskin outfit. Yes, it’s pretty ridiculous and certain to earn the ire of PETA.

62. Steering wheel

Seems like someone's idea for a tribute to auto safety. Still, one steering wheel would've done fine.

Seems like someone’s idea for a tribute to auto safety. Still, one steering wheel would’ve done fine.

63. Joker bride

Because even the most evil Batman villain shouldn't have to die alone. Yeah, I know he's shipped with Harley Quinn. But that's beside the point.

Because even the most evil Batman villain shouldn’t have to die alone. Yeah, I know he’s shipped with Harley Quinn. But that’s beside the point.

64. In the spotlight

Now that's an original idea. Wonder how she could move around with having lights over her. Man, this outfit is ridiculous.

Now that’s an original idea. Wonder how she could move around with having lights over her. Man, this outfit is ridiculous.

65. Sexy harlequin

When it comes to clowns, I really don't want stuff like this. Clowns were never meant to be sexy by all means.

When it comes to clowns, I really don’t want stuff like this. Clowns were never meant to be sexy by all means.

66. Sexy Tinker Toys

Tinker Toys at a Victoria's Secret fashion show? Now that's just wrong. Just wrong. Really they're kids toys and were never meant to be sexy.

Tinker Toys at a Victoria’s Secret fashion show? Now that’s just wrong. Just wrong. Really they’re kids toys and were never meant to be sexy. My childhood is ruined.

67. Tree

Well, at least she looks more like a tree than the Stanford University mascots. But still wouldn't be surprised if bird happened to build a nest on her.

Well, at least she looks more like a tree than the Stanford University mascots. But still wouldn’t be surprised if bird happened to build a nest on her.

68. Zipper

Now that's a very big zipper. I wonder whether he'd be able to breath if I zip his outfit all the way up.

Now that’s a very big zipper. I wonder whether he’d be able to breath if I zip his outfit all the way up.

69. Space Age Bride

Let's just say if this is a chic wedding look in the 22nd century, God help my descendants. It's ridiculous in my opinion.

Let’s just say if this is a chic wedding look in the 22nd century, God help my descendants. It’s ridiculous in my opinion.

70. Hot tiger

I think this would've been better if she was wearing an actual tiger costume. And not a sexed up one at that.

I think this would’ve been better if she was wearing an actual tiger costume. And not a sexed up one at that.

71. Roulette wheel

Of course, this costume is oddly appropriate for a Halloween in Las Vegas. And it doesn't hurt that it's a sexy costume to boot.

Of course, this costume is oddly appropriate for a Halloween in Las Vegas. And it doesn’t hurt that it’s a sexy costume to boot.

72. Sexy astronaut

Sorry, lady, but astronaut suits don't work that way. I mean there's a really good reason why such outfits aren't sexy at all. Think about it.

Sorry, lady, but astronaut suits don’t work that way. I mean there’s a really good reason why such outfits aren’t sexy at all. And they don’t have a lot bling on them either. Think about it.

73. Tweety Bird

And you thought Tweety Bird was an insult to canaries. Then again despite the lisp, he's actually quite funny and clever. Still, this costume is utterly ridiculous beyond the pale.

And you thought Tweety Bird was an insult to canaries. Then again despite the lisp, he’s actually quite funny and clever. Still, this costume is utterly ridiculous beyond the pale.

74. Punk Showgirl

Wonder which Las Vegas casino has showgirls like that. Not sure where that would be. But yeah, really ridiculous if you get my drift.

Wonder which Las Vegas casino has showgirls like that. Not sure where that would be. But yeah, really ridiculous if you get my drift.

75. TV test screen

Didn't know they had a swimsuit like this. Could've used it in a post this summer. But yeah, brings me memories from the 1990s.

Didn’t know they had a swimsuit like this. Could’ve used it in a post this summer. But yeah, brings me memories from the 1990s.

76. Gold Man

Because he's all covered in gold. Duh. However, he still needs to wear clothes though.

Because he’s all covered in gold. Duh. However, he still needs to wear clothes though. Don’t want to see his gold member.

77. Sea monster

Not sure what that's really supposed to be specifically. But I know it has absolutely no place in a fashion show. Not sure about Halloween.

Not sure what that’s really supposed to be specifically. But I know it has absolutely no place in a fashion show. Not sure about Halloween.

78. Hawaiian businessman

Because you can't go to a board meeting in Honolulu without a grass hula skirt. It's just the custom there. Don't ask me.

Because you can’t go to a board meeting in Honolulu without a grass hula skirt. It’s just the custom there. Don’t ask me.

79. Pink powderpuff

That or possibly Lady Gaga's wedding cake or bathrobe. Take your pick. But I certainly can't see this woman's arms at all.

That or possibly Lady Gaga’s wedding cake or bathrobe. Take your pick. But I certainly can’t see this woman’s arms at all.

80. Ziggy Stardust

This might be on purpose but still, looks almost exactly like 1970s David Bowie with boobs. Not sure what to think about that.

This might be on purpose but still, looks almost exactly like 1970s David Bowie with boobs. Not sure what to think about that.