I’m not a big fan of the fashion industry. For me, it revolves around designers selling overpriced clothes made from sweatshop workers in South Asia so they can design clothes that nobody would want to be caught dead in. I mean seriously, who the hell is going to wear the stuff you see on the runway during Fashion Week. Seriously, what these models wear on the runway is simply ridiculous that you’d have to be crazy to wear such clothes on the street. Now I understand the need for designers to express themselves but c’mon, the whole point of fashion is to design clothes for people to wear. The stuff you see on the runway nowadays just makes the fashion industry a joke. The designer label clothes cost too much and are too impractical for normal people to wear. And don’t even get me started on body image and women. Besides, when it comes to buying clothes, I really don’t give a shit about the designer or brand. Designer labels have no relevance on my life. I just care whether it comes cheap and whether it’ll last me a long time. And I can care less whether any designer brand items I own are knockoffs or not. Not to mention, I’ve known quite well that higher prices don’t mean better quality products. Just look at a Consumer Reports manual on cars. Last year, I had this idea of using runway fashions as Halloween costumes but for various undisclosed reasons, I didn’t go through with it. However, this year things are different since I already did a post on costumes and my Halloween posts haven’t done as good as I thought, save the one on pumpkin dioramas. That one did better than I expected. Still, we can spend this October having a little fun with high fashion by seeing them as inspirations for Halloween costumes. Here are some Halloween worthy runway fashions you might not want to miss. Costume names will be subject to my observations.
- The feline dominatrix from the anime version of Cats
Of course, she wasn’t allowed to bring her cat o’ nine tails and handcuffs with her. Yeah, runway policy is strict about these things.
2. The Mad Hatter on Casual Friday
Now the top is fine and something I can actually wear. Not sure about the bottom though. But still, looks like something you can picture the Mad Hatter wearing on his day off.
3. Vibrator/Video Game Console
Yeah, having an outfit resembling male genitalia won’t get my mind out of the gutter on this one. Seriously, I think whoever designed this must have a substance abuse problem.
4. Escaped inmate from a mental hospital
Let’s just say the straitjacket is really not a good sign about her personality. Seriously, she’s likely to be dangerously insane as far as we know.
Sure hate to know the effectiveness of that eraser. Still, she looks more like a No. 2 from the waist down.
6. Renaissance Painting
Wonder what artist she’s wearing. You’d think she’d go with the easy choices like Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael, or Donatello. I mean those guys have Ninja Turtles named after them.
7. Fancy feather duster
For only dusting the finest shelves and china thank you very much. Still, not sure if I like this costume set up.
Of course, she has a face for every look. But if you want to know how she really feels, just check her social media.
For some reason, this doesn’t remind me of the ferocious king of the savannah. Also, I’m sure lions aren’t black. But I see you have to go with what you have.
10. Pink, fluffy cloud
Now this looks exactly as I see it. Guess this outfit was video game inspired, perhaps in the Nintendo fashion.
11. Clothes Frankenstein
Because it looks like she stitched that skirt up from a bunch of pieces in the dumpster. Not sure about the jacket.
Apparently, Rapunzel liked to experiment with her ridiculously long hair. Well, at least before her prince wanted her to let down her hair.
13. Snakes having sex
If you want to know how snakes have sex, this is only a mild representation. But if you see any photos, it’s exactly a bunch of males getting on top of each other in order to mate with a female.
14. WWE character reject
Apparently this guy was too outrageous for professional studio wrestling. Then again, studio wrestling’s fake as they say.
15. Knight of Ni in the rain
Seems like he’ll wait for a shrubbery for as long as it takes. Oh, I forgot they don’t like the word “it.” Still, didn’t know they had plastic ponchos in the Middle Ages.
16. Brooklyn lady knight
Too bad the Brooklyn Nets no longer have the knight. Because I think she would’ve made a great companion mascot for him.
17. The “one size fits all shirt”
You know those shirt you might see at a store that stretch a lot? This is what her outfit reminds me of for some reason.
18. Major Tom from David Bowie’s “Space Oddity”
If they made music videos in the 1970s like they do now, I can imagine someone in the “Space Oddity” one wearing an outfit like this. I mean that looks very much Ziggy Stardust era if you ask me.
19. Grumpy Sun
Just because she’s the sun doesn’t mean she’s all rainbows and sunshine. Also what the hell did she do to her lips?
20. Mesoamerican Christmas tree
So they didn’t celebrate Christmas in Pre-Columbian Mesoamerica. But c’mon, if they did, I’m sure you’d see trees like this in their paintings.
21. Modestly dressed Lady Gaga
Then again, almost any of these costumes can be of Lady Gaga in one variation or another. Of course, seeing Lady Gaga in this makes her look normal in comparison to the other stuff she’s worn.
22. Justin Bieber
Just because. Seriously, Bieber did model underwear for Calvin Klein. And he’s an obnoxious brat.
23. Ancient Chinese road worker
For one, because his outfit has Chinese symbols and is in that style. Second, because it’s bright yellow and orange kind akin to what PennDOT workers wear.
24. African insect goddess
Because I’m not sure what else this reminds me of. Besides, deities can look like just about anything.
25. Frog lady
Hmm..using Kermit for a top. Now as a muppet fan, that ain’t right. Seriously, why?
Seems like her outfit doesn’t have the first 3 colors in sequence. Shouldn’t they be red, orange, and yellow?
27. 1980s sci-fi villain
Yeah, kind of reminds me of that. I mean 1980s sci fi outfits tend to be incredibly ridiculous for some reason. Don’t ask me.
28. Accordion pants
Of course, his pants just look like you can use them in an accordion. They also make him look like an idiot.
Now I don’t mean Tom Hanks’s character from a movie when he’s stranded on the deserted island. I mean someone actually stranded on a deserted island. Then again, I’m not sure about the striped pants.
30. Shower curtain balloon
If that were white, I’d swear she’d be a runway version of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. Still, you can tell she totally doesn’t want to wear the thing.
31. High couture Marge Simpson
Basically this is what Marge Simpson would look like if she changed her style and dyed her hair. Yeah, not much different.
32. Futuristic bunny rabbit
Because the head looks just like a bunny head. Not sure about the hand things though. Doesn’t make any sense.
33. High couture circus clown
Because she needs to make the audience laugh while in style. Yes, clowns care about fashion, too, you know.
34. Chic Aztec god
Because this is what the guy’s outfit reminds me of, especially around the mouth. Seems like he’s hungry for some human sacrifice.
35. NFL linebacker at a golf course
Odd that he doesn’t have his clubs with him. Then again, I’m sure NFL linebackers don’t dress this way on the golf course. I just think it’s funny.
36. Goat lady
Or as my dad calls it, “a representation of Stevie Nicks.” Of course, she does sound like a goat.
37. Knit freak with a death wish
From what his shirt says, this guy must have major issues. Then again, the outfit is pretty ridiculous.
38. Alaskan dog sledder
Please don’t be a piece of cultural appropriation. Because it sure looks like it from the animal skins. Then again, he could just as well be Norwegian polar explorer Roald Admundsen, who was the first guy to reach the South Pole and sail the Northwest Passage.
39. Slasher horror movie villain on a date
What’s surprising to me is how movie psycho killers seem to have horrible fashion sense. But don’t tell him that.
40. All-seeing eye
Now this is freaky like from some sci-fi movie. But I assure it would make a great Halloween costume.
Just a guy with tape all over him. But it looks like confetti to me. Yes, I don’t get why this was at a fashion show.
42. Crazy cat man
You heard of the crazy cat lady right? Well, I think this guy makes her look normal.
43. Tidal wave
Wouldn’t want to surf on that. Can’t even see that person’s face. Still, wonder how she could move around in that.
44. Ancient warrior from Las Vegas
My apologies to any Native Americans living in Las Vegas because I don’t mean to insult your native culture. But still, the guy is wearing a hat you’d see on a Vegas showgirl and he’s certainly in warrior apparel. Just can’t ignore that.
Yes, this is the pattern you wear for business apparel. And she has it all over her. Kind of overdoing it if you ask me.
46. Migrant farm worker
Now this looks pretty bad here and it’s pretty insulting to the farm workers who help feed our country for God’s sake. Then again, this pretty much reflects what Donald Trump thinks about Mexicans. Best to loose the trash bag dress.
47. Designer handbag
Well, at least she went with a more low key approach. Still, that hat is hideous.
48. Mexican at a disco
C’mon, she’s wearing a sombrero and a shiny outfit. What else could you expect?
49. Chest of drawers
Now this actually looks doable compared to the others. Ridiculous but doable. Still, reminds me of furniture.
I mean she has a bunch of speakers on her head. So the name fits. Yes, it’s very ridiculous but it’s funny.
51. Blond Bigfoot
Almost considered calling it, “Blond Chewbacca” but I didn’t want to insult any Star Wars fans. Nor did I want to offend Dr. Seuss fans either. But Sasquatch hunters are fair game.
Now this one speaks for itself. Her dress has a couple of eggs over easy and her hair is done like bacon strips.
53. Newest member of Daft Punk
Yeah, I’m sure I know why she’s in the group. And I don’t think it’s because of her musical talent either.
54. Hardcore Raver
Now that’s not a very appropriate trick or treating costume. Guess you might want to aim for modesty and go as Slave Leia.
55. Champion polo player from the dead
Guess she shows us that polo was a lady’s game in the 18th century. How she was able to play in that dress, I don’t have the slightest idea.
56. Pineapple head
Now that definitely looks like a pineapple head. Still, her outfit would’ve been totally fine without it.
57. Frankenstein’s wife
Guess they’re referring to Dr. Frankenstein’s wife here. The monster’s mate ‘s costume is probably much cooler. I mean have you ever seen Bride of Frankenstein?
58. Effie Trinket from The Hunger Games
Or Effie Trinket if she appeared in a Dr. Seuss story. Then again, a lot of these outfits could be in Effie’s wardrobe.
59. Killer Queen
“She’s a Killer Queen/Gunpowder, gelatine/Dynamite with a laser beam/Guaranteed to blow your mind/Anytime…”
60. Flock of doves
Wonder how many dead doves it took to make this dress? More than I want to know, I guess.
Yeah, she kind of does look like she’s wearing a skimpy snakeskin outfit. Yes, it’s pretty ridiculous and certain to earn the ire of PETA.
62. Steering wheel
Seems like someone’s idea for a tribute to auto safety. Still, one steering wheel would’ve done fine.
63. Joker bride
Because even the most evil Batman villain shouldn’t have to die alone. Yeah, I know he’s shipped with Harley Quinn. But that’s beside the point.
64. In the spotlight
Now that’s an original idea. Wonder how she could move around with having lights over her. Man, this outfit is ridiculous.
65. Sexy harlequin
When it comes to clowns, I really don’t want stuff like this. Clowns were never meant to be sexy by all means.
66. Sexy Tinker Toys
Tinker Toys at a Victoria’s Secret fashion show? Now that’s just wrong. Just wrong. Really they’re kids toys and were never meant to be sexy. My childhood is ruined.
Well, at least she looks more like a tree than the Stanford University mascots. But still wouldn’t be surprised if bird happened to build a nest on her.
Now that’s a very big zipper. I wonder whether he’d be able to breath if I zip his outfit all the way up.
69. Space Age Bride
Let’s just say if this is a chic wedding look in the 22nd century, God help my descendants. It’s ridiculous in my opinion.
70. Hot tiger
I think this would’ve been better if she was wearing an actual tiger costume. And not a sexed up one at that.
71. Roulette wheel
Of course, this costume is oddly appropriate for a Halloween in Las Vegas. And it doesn’t hurt that it’s a sexy costume to boot.
72. Sexy astronaut
Sorry, lady, but astronaut suits don’t work that way. I mean there’s a really good reason why such outfits aren’t sexy at all. And they don’t have a lot bling on them either. Think about it.
73. Tweety Bird
And you thought Tweety Bird was an insult to canaries. Then again despite the lisp, he’s actually quite funny and clever. Still, this costume is utterly ridiculous beyond the pale.
74. Punk Showgirl
Wonder which Las Vegas casino has showgirls like that. Not sure where that would be. But yeah, really ridiculous if you get my drift.
75. TV test screen
Didn’t know they had a swimsuit like this. Could’ve used it in a post this summer. But yeah, brings me memories from the 1990s.
76. Gold Man
Because he’s all covered in gold. Duh. However, he still needs to wear clothes though. Don’t want to see his gold member.
77. Sea monster
Not sure what that’s really supposed to be specifically. But I know it has absolutely no place in a fashion show. Not sure about Halloween.
78. Hawaiian businessman
Because you can’t go to a board meeting in Honolulu without a grass hula skirt. It’s just the custom there. Don’t ask me.
79. Pink powderpuff
That or possibly Lady Gaga’s wedding cake or bathrobe. Take your pick. But I certainly can’t see this woman’s arms at all.
80. Ziggy Stardust
This might be on purpose but still, looks almost exactly like 1970s David Bowie with boobs. Not sure what to think about that.