Easter Cakes

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Easter is among a handful of holidays that features cakes and other pastries. My family usually has a bunny cake to celebrate Easter with since there a lot of kids and easy to make. Yet, you also have other motifs such as eggs, chicks, baskets, and flowers. Some may take a more religious motif such as crosses and an empty tomb. Yes, Easter is the time for such cute and colorful confections associated with spring and the resurrection. Now I can go on and on about the lovely professionally made cakes out there. But I know that none of you would be interested since those cakes won’t be worth making fun of. Instead, I’ll compile a post pertaining to some of the great caketastrophes mostly because many of them are unintentionally funny as well as fun to laugh at. Now these cakes are professionally made which you’d find in a store. So for your pleasure, here are some of the great Easter cake blunders that would make Peter Rabbit puke.

1. We begin with the celebration of new life as a chick emerges from its shell.

Okay, I know real chicks aren't cute and fluffy when just out of the egg. Yet, this one seems to induce nightmares.

Okay, I know real chicks aren’t cute and fluffy when just out of the egg. Yet, this one seems to induce nightmares.

2. Of course, you can’t do anything wrong with a basket cake.

Now that's a real basket case if you ask me. More like a muppet with roses instead of eyes. Of course, he can't really smell the roses for he's wearing rose colored glasses.

Now that’s a real basket case if you ask me. More like a muppet with roses instead of eyes. Of course, he can’t really smell the roses for he’s wearing rose colored glasses. Also, how long did this decorator realize that this cake was upside down?

3. When it comes to whether the chicken or the egg came first, this baker has the answer.

So it was the chicken sperm that came first. Definitely not age appropriate material for an Easter cake, especially in a family setting.

So it was the chicken sperm that came first. Definitely not age appropriate material for an Easter cake, especially in a family setting.

4. For those more religiously inclined, this Easter cross is for you.

You call that a cross? Seriously, how hard is it to mess up on a cross cake. I mean that's just ungodly hideous for God's sake.

You call that a cross? Seriously, how hard is it to mess up on a cross cake. I mean that’s just ungodly hideous for God’s sake.

5. For those who love Easter and Angry Birds, this is the cake for you.

Of course, green pigs might want to stay away from this one. Nevertheless, she's bringing sexy quack.

Of course, green pigs might want to stay away from this one. Nevertheless, she’s bringing sexy quack.

6. Now we get to bunny cakes, hope nothing can go wrong with that.

Spiked whiskers? That's just freaky. Seriously, couldn't they use a different kind of icing for that?

Spiked whiskers? That’s just freaky. Seriously, couldn’t they use a different kind of icing for that?

7. Happy Easter from the chick with the chipmunk cheeks.

And from what I can tell, he seems quite amazed by all the food in his midst. Oh, I forgot, he is food.

And from what I can tell, he seems quite amazed by all the food in his midst. Oh, I forgot, he is food.

8. Once upon a time, a group of bunny rabbits found a field filled with the most enormous carrots.

Unfortunately, the field was located near the Waltz Mill Westinghouse nuclear power plant which experienced a major meltdown during the 1970s. Let's just say it really messed up a lot of rabbit genetics and leave it at that.

Unfortunately, the field was located near the Waltz Mill Westinghouse nuclear power plant which experienced a major meltdown during the 1970s. Let’s just say it really messed up a lot of rabbit genetics and leave it at that.

9. Happy Easter from Angry Big Bird.

Sorry, kids, but you've come at a really bad time to ask Big Bird on how to get to Sesame Street. Seriously, you don't want to see him when he's angry.

Sorry, kids, but you’ve come at a really bad time to ask Big Bird on how to get to Sesame Street. Seriously, you don’t want to see him when he’s angry.

10. Nothing says Easter like a field of giant carrots rising up and eating all the bunnies.

Seriously, since when did anyone think of cupcakes depicting bunny eating carrots would be great for Easter? I mean was this decorator on drugs?

Seriously, since when did anyone think of cupcakes depicting bunny eating carrots would be great for Easter? I mean was this decorator on drugs?

11. Happy Easter from the Snidely Whiplash bunny with twist ties on its neck.

I'd really hate to see what this bunny is up to. Seems like it wants to tie somebody on the railroad tracks while in sight of an oncoming train.

I’d really hate to see what this bunny is up to. Seems like it wants to tie somebody on the railroad tracks while in sight of an oncoming train.

12. Rejoice and be glad! For He has risen! Or not.

Since when is an RIP tombstone an appropriate motif for an Easter cake. I mean those who know about Jesus know his tomb resembled a small cave, not something you'd see in a cemetery.

Since when is an RIP tombstone an appropriate motif for an Easter cake. I mean those who know about Jesus know his tomb resembled a small cave, not something you’d see in a cemetery.

13. This little chick must watch out or else be Pac-Man’s supper.

Okay, I know this is supposed to be a cake depicting a chick hatching from an egg. Yet, this more or less looks like a decorated Pac Man gone rogue for some reason.

Okay, I know this is supposed to be a cake depicting a chick hatching from an egg. Yet, this more or less looks like a decorated Pac Man gone rogue for some reason.

14. Of course, you can’t go wrong with a lamb cake this Easter Season.

Yet, this one somehow manages to get impaled with an American flag. How adorable! Not. I'd hate to see the national implications there.

Yet, this one somehow manages to get impaled with an American flag. How adorable! Not. I’d hate to see the national implications there.

15. Of course, while lambs are seen as tranquil and innocent animals, this isn’t always the case.

Apparently, this lamb saw other lambs smoking and thought it was cool. Of course, little did it know it would lead to lungs filled with tar, on the other hand.

Apparently, this lamb saw other lambs smoking and thought it was cool. Of course, little did it know it would lead to lungs filled with tar, on the other hand.

16. Of course, if you don’t like animals, then Easter egg cakes are a viable choice.

Then again, perhaps Easter isn't the time of year that calls for cakes with subliminal imagery, especially for events with kids around. They may not understand.

Then again, perhaps Easter isn’t the time of year that calls for cakes with subliminal imagery, especially for events with kids around. They may not understand.

17. Happy Easter and all bow down to the dreaded Easter Bunny holding the sacred carrots.

Abandon all hope for ye who enter here. Boy, I think someone might want to call the Bunny exorcist here because this rabbit seems possessed.

Abandon all hope for ye who enter here. Boy, I think someone might want to call the Bunny exorcist here because this rabbit seems possessed.

18. Seems like the Easter Bunny needs to trim his claws before he scares the children away.

Recounting the rabbit's face, this won't happen anytime soon. Also needs to do something about that hump.

Recounting the rabbit’s face, this won’t happen anytime soon. Also needs to do something about that hump.

19. Happy Easter from the bunny who wants to hop in and bite your face off.

Yes, this rabbit seems like the kind to give you nightmares. You might want to have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in handy, just in case.

Yes, this rabbit seems like the kind to give you nightmares. You might want to have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in handy, just in case.

20. Happy Easter from the newly hatched chick from an Easter egg.

Reminds me of what the Genie said in Aladdin, "PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWERS!! Itty bitty living space." Also, don't like the look on that chick's face.

Reminds me of what the Genie said in Aladdin, “PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWERS!! Itty bitty living space.” Also, don’t like the look on that chick’s face.

21. Evil Easter Bunny bestows his greetings. So hop to it or else.

I don't know about you, but perhaps using jelly beans for facial features may not be a good idea. Seriously, this bunny looks more like a hare out of Hell.

I don’t know about you, but perhaps using jelly beans for facial features may not be a good idea. Seriously, this bunny looks more like a hare out of Hell.

22. I’m sure an Easter bunny cookie cake would make a great dessert for the whole family.

I don't know about you but there's something odd about that bunny that greatly disturbs me. Perhaps it's rising to the occasion or bursting forth with glorious song if you know what I mean.

I don’t know about you but there’s something odd about that bunny that greatly disturbs me. Perhaps it’s rising to the occasion or bursting forth with glorious song if you know what I mean.

23. Happy Easter courtesy of the Incredible Hulk Chick.

Seems like the gamma rays really spread to the barnyard variety have they? Nevertheless, the only way you can tell it's supposed to be the chick is due to the plastic.

Seems like the gamma rays really spread to the barnyard variety have they? Nevertheless, the only way you can tell it’s supposed to be the chick is due to the plastic.

24. Nothing commemorates Jesus’ resurrection like splattery tie dye and carrots on the cross.

Well, a tie dye resurrection cake could be all rights when it pertains to a theatrical celebration of Jesus Christ: Superstar. As with the carrots, well, they're not cruciferous vegetables.

Well, a tie dye resurrection cake could be all rights when it pertains to a theatrical celebration of Jesus Christ: Superstar. As with the carrots, well, they’re not cruciferous vegetables.

25. Easter egg or a slice of giant old pepperoni?

Well, it's hard to say but judging by how the dotted orange egg isn't a great oval, I'd go with the old pepperoni.

Well, it’s hard to say but judging by how the dotted orange egg isn’t a great oval, I’d go with the old pepperoni.

26. Of course, when it comes to eggs, their simple oval shape shouldn’t be difficult to depict on a cake.

Wait a minute. That's no Easter egg. That's an Easter themed Christmas tree. Seriously, apparently who ever made this cake doesn't seem to understand basic geometry.

Wait a minute. That’s no Easter egg. That’s an Easter themed Christmas tree. Seriously, apparently who ever made this cake doesn’t seem to understand basic geometry.

27. We all know that the Easter Bunny delivers eggs to children at Easter but did you know he also has his own carrot car?

Then again, this might not be a great artistic rendition. Also, why does the Easter Bunny have a mustache in this and carries an expression as if he's been in an accident?

Then again, this might not be a great artistic rendition. Also, why does the Easter Bunny have a mustache in this and carries an expression as if he’s been in an accident?

28. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you, Electro Egg.

Yes, this is Electro Egg. And by the look of his face, someone is bound for a shocker, literally.

Yes, this is Electro Egg. And by the look of his face, someone is bound for a shocker, literally.

29. Happy Easter from the cutest yellow chick from your nightmares!

Now the more you look at this chick the creepier it looks for some reason. Seriously, it's freaking me out right now.

Now the more you look at this chick the creepier it looks for some reason. Seriously, it’s freaking me out right now.

30. This cake depicts a chick because we all know it’s one of the few Easter animals that say, “Peep Peep.”

Yet, from how I see it, it seems like a freakish yellow seahorse to me. Or possibly a weird banana with eyes or a swan. Then again, it may well be an alien from outer space for all we know.

Yet, from how I see it, it seems like a freakish yellow seahorse to me. Or possibly a weird banana with eyes or a swan. Then again, it may well be an alien from outer space for all we know.

31. Happy Easter from the -wait a minute are those, boobs? What happened to its arms then?

Now I know that the decorator intended those to be arms. Yet, when you look at it, you have to wonder whether such confection is appropriate for children.

Now I know that the decorator intended those to be arms. Yet, when you look at it, you have to wonder whether such confection is appropriate for children.

32. Behold, all hail our Cute Overlord, Moldy Puffs Pickle-Ears.

Is it just me or do green Easter Bunny cakes just seem disgusting to you? Well, it does to me and I don't think this bunny's thoughts are all that innocent.

Is it just me or do green Easter Bunny cakes just seem disgusting to you? Well, it does to me and I don’t think this bunny’s thoughts are all that innocent.

33. Nothing says Easter than a cake with a volcano design.

Hate to imagine what that bunny is doing to that egg. Nevertheless, why use a volcano cake for Easter? Oh, it's supposed to be an egg, but I'm not sure if I can believe that.

Hate to imagine what that bunny is doing to that egg. Nevertheless, why use a volcano cake for Easter? Oh, it’s supposed to be an egg, but I’m not sure if I can believe that.

34. May I present to you the Easter, what the hell is this?

Now I know this is supposed to be an Easter cake since it contains spring motifs like bunnies and flowers. Yet, I don't know if I can tell whether this is a stool or a Shinto shrine.

Now I know this is supposed to be an Easter cake since it contains spring motifs like bunnies and flowers. Yet, I don’t know if I can tell whether this is a stool or a Shinto shrine.

35. Nothing says Easter like a chick who can’t quite get out of its Easter egg.

Apparently, this decorator should've just stuck with the egg and left it at that. Having a chick come out of it is all the more disturbing for some reason.

Apparently, this decorator should’ve just stuck with the egg and left it at that. Having a chick come out of it is all the more disturbing for some reason.

36. Happy Easter from your beloved Easter Bunny from Hell!

Seems like this cake decorator had some traumatic encounter with a costumed Easter Bunny as a kid at the mall. Totally understandable but this doesn't stop such image from haunting children's dreams.

Seems like this cake decorator had some traumatic encounter with a costumed Easter Bunny as a kid at the mall. Totally understandable but this doesn’t stop such image from haunting children’s dreams.

37. Though we all know that Easter commemorates Jesus’ resurrection, but did you know that there were two bunnies holding eggs near the cross during his crucifixion?

Yes, I know the Cross is a popular Easter motif as well as bunnies and eggs. But just because some symbols may belong on the same holiday doesn't mean they go together. I mean there's a reason why we don't include Santa in the nativity scene on Christmas for God's sake.

Yes, I know the Cross is a popular Easter motif as well as bunnies and eggs. But just because some symbols may belong on the same holiday doesn’t mean they go together. I mean there’s a reason why we don’t include Santa in the nativity scene on Christmas for God’s sake.

38. While Lambs are supposed to be sweet and innocent, this lamb is a whole different story.

Yes, this lamb may be young and spring born. But it seems to have murder on the mind and is probably the black sheep of the family in a metaphorical sense.

Yes, this lamb may be young and spring born. But it seems to have murder on the mind and is probably the black sheep of the family in a metaphorical sense.

39. Nothing says Easter than a cake depicting a rabbit from a science experiment gone bad.

Okay, this cake was decorated by a person who A. has never seen a rabbit, B. is on drugs, C. was influenced by drawings of Dr. Seuss or other weird illustrators, or D. all of the above.

Okay, this cake was decorated by a person who A. has never seen a rabbit, B. is on drugs, C. was influenced by drawings of Dr. Seuss or other weird illustrators, or D. all of the above.

40. I now give you, Bunny Bugs.

I'm not sure why the decorator thought such concept was a good idea. They just look like pink worms with bunny heads. Disgusting.

I’m not sure why the decorator thought such concept was a good idea. They just look like pink worms with bunny heads. Disgusting.

41. Since Jesus is the Lamb of God, then it’s only fitting to have a lamb on the cross.

Now how in the hell is that a cross? If not, then what the hell is it? Then again, it reminds me of something but I'm not sure if this is the kind of post to disclose it.

Now how in the hell is that a cross? If not, then what the hell is it? Then again, it reminds me of something but I’m not sure if this is the kind of post to disclose it.

42. Nothing says Easter like, cookies of gingerbread men?

Of course, Easter does revolve around the themes of resurrection and new life so it's only fitting. The gingerbread men represent the decaying corpses on the ground while the carrot and rabbit symbolize the new life coming out from them.

Of course, Easter does revolve around the themes of resurrection and new life so it’s only fitting. The gingerbread men represent the decaying corpses on the ground while the carrot and rabbit symbolize the new life coming out from them.

43. You can’t celebrate Easter without a cake of the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog.

Sure it may seem like a harmless bunny but as Tim the Enchanter said, "That's no ordinary rabbit! That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!" Make sure you have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in handy.

Sure it may seem like a harmless bunny but as Tim the Enchanter said, “That’s no ordinary rabbit! That’s the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!” Make sure you have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in handy.

44. Nothing says Easter like a cake depicting a cross of green.

Oh, my bad, that's Saint Patrick's Day. Of course, while the Saint Paddy's motifs are obvious, it apparently didn't sell by  March 17. So it's marketed as an Easter cake instead.

Oh, my bad, that’s Saint Patrick’s Day. Of course, while the Saint Paddy’s motifs are obvious, it apparently didn’t sell by March 17. So it’s marketed as an Easter cake instead.

45. Of course, you can’t have Easter without a cake depicting a rabbit’s posterior in its natural habitat.

Let's just say, I don't understand the appeal of butt cakes and never will. Still, where's the rest of the rabbit for God's sake?

Let’s just say, I don’t understand the appeal of butt cakes and never will. Still, where’s the rest of the rabbit for God’s sake?

Hippity, Hoppity, Sketchy Easter Bunnies on Their Way

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Okay, Easter isn’t quite like Christmas or anywhere close. I mean Easter revolves around bunnies and eggs as well as celebrates Jesus’ resurrection. Sure there are gifts in baskets as well as candy but it’s nothing compared to Christmas. But this doesn’t stop some people from trying to make it like a spring version of the winter yuletide holiday. And instead of a white bearded guy in a red suit, you have the Easter Bunny who’s depicted as someone wearing a bunny costume like you’d see at a furry convention. In fact, a costumed Easter Bunny is probably a furry underneath those over-sized rabbit ears and cotton tail. However, though rabbits are adorable animals, there’s nothing cute about an adult wearing an animal costume, no matter how adorable the animal is in question. But this doesn’t stop parents from having their kids pose with these costumed monstrosities, sometimes compelling children to wish they could sit on the creepy mall Santa’s lap. In this post, you will see some of the most terrifying Easter Bunnies imaginable which have incite terrors into children more than the one from Donnie Darko or the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog (well, I’m not sure about that but it managed to scare off a bunch of knights from Monty Python and the Holy Grail). So for your reading pleasure, here is an assortment of Easter Bunnies who might be more terrifying than a crucified man since such costumed bunnies are walking, talking nightmares of soul scarring horror. Some material may not be safe for work.

1. “Could you take this child, please? I’m late for a bank robbery.”

This little girl doesn't look too happy here. Of course, if I were her, I'd probably feel the same way.

This little girl doesn’t look too happy here. Of course, if I were her, I’d probably feel the same way.

2. These eyes are empty and only reveal that this rabbit has no soul.

I know this is supposed to be a bunny. But it also seems like it's from a different world or in another dimension. Yet, it seems to have murder on the mind. That little girl better watch it.

I know this is supposed to be a bunny. But it also seems like it’s from a different world or in another dimension. Yet, it seems to have murder on the mind. That little girl better watch it.

3. “Mommy, get me off him! He wants to eat me!”

Painfully this little girl cries like there's no tomorrow as this Easter Bunny is already looking for his next victim. Those blue eyes only desire the sweet blood of children.

Painfully this little girl cries like there’s no tomorrow as this Easter Bunny is already looking for his next victim. Those blue eyes only desire the sweet blood of children.

4. What are you waiting for, girl? You have roller blades and joint pads so go before the giant long furry Peter Cottontail tries to get you! Your life depends on it.

I don't like the look on that bunny's face. You can already tell he's at that roller skating rink eying at the small, slow ones.

I don’t like the look on that bunny’s face. You can already tell he’s at that roller skating rink eying at the small, slow ones.

5. Sometimes people have their pets pose with the Easter Bunny instead of their children.

Those are actually just whiskers. His mouth is the part that's salivating over the dog he's about to swallow whole. I don't want to think about it. Seems like PETA will never hear the end of it.

Those are actually just whiskers. His mouth is the part that’s salivating over the dog he’s about to swallow whole. I don’t want to think about it. Seems like PETA will never hear the end of it.

6. “If you want me to deliver your Easter basket, I’ll need that alarm code.”

Little girl, run away and never return. Seriously, that bunny's nothing but bad news from the look in his eyes that bear no trace of kindness to any living creature.

Little girl, run away and never return. Seriously, that bunny’s nothing but bad news from the look in his eyes that bear no trace of kindness to any living creature.

7. “We’re going to have a lot of fun together.” (followed by evil maniacal laugh).

Seems like the rabbit is thinking, "I didn't know they came in chocolate varieties. Looks delicious."

Seems like the rabbit is thinking, “I didn’t know they came in chocolate varieties. Looks delicious.” Sorry, NAACP, I was just trying to say it from the rabbit’s point of view.

8. “What do you know? A double pack.”

Man, this bunny sure seems happy but not in a good way. Don't want to be those girls on his lap.

Man, this bunny sure seems happy but not in a good way. Don’t want to be those girls on his lap.

9. “Have you ever seen the inside of a windowless van?”

This girl sitting on his lap doesn't seem to be crying. Either she's very brave or really has no idea of what that bunny has in store for her.

This girl sitting on his lap doesn’t seem to be crying. Either she’s very brave or really has no idea of what that bunny has in store for her.

10. “Mommy, no! Please, come back, Mommy! I’ll be good, I promise! Anything but the Easter Bunny, please!”

Behold, the expressionless face of an unrepentent monster. Seriously,spare him his life from this monstrosity!

Behold, the expressionless face of an unrepentent monster. Seriously,spare him his life from this monstrosity!

11. Behold, the ferocious bunny slasher! It’s prey: children, sweet innocent children.

Even by Easter Bunny standards, those eyes are demonic. No wonder he spends most of this time hidden among the bushes, waiting for some unsuspecting kid to drop by.

Even by Easter Bunny standards, those eyes are demonic. No wonder he spends most of this time hidden among the bushes, waiting for some unsuspecting kid to drop by. Also, is that blood?

12. This lovely lady bunny from Crayola seems to be pulling off the crying Tammy Faye Bakker look with her eyelashes. Her lashes are so lush they turn the whole eye black.

And, yes, it seems like this lady bunny appears to have the makings of either a makeup contract or a slasher horror movie in which she plays the one killing everyone.

And, yes, it seems like this lady bunny appears to have the makings of either a makeup contract or a slasher horror movie in which she plays the one killing everyone.

13. “Prisoner 49581, please submit yourself to The Bunny. Prisoner 49581 to The Bunny.”

Hey, it could be worse, kid, at least you're way too young to be eligible for the Hunger Games. Even so, I have a bad feeling about this situation.

Hey, it could be worse, kid, at least you’re way too young to be eligible for the Hunger Games. Even so, I have a bad feeling about this situation.

14. As if Easter Bunnies look scary enough with kids, they even look creepier alone.

"Welcome to my humble abode, would you like some of my carrot and children stew? Got the recipe from a cookbook by one Dr. Hannibal Lecter."

“Welcome to my humble abode, would you like some of my carrot and children stew? Got the recipe from a cookbook by one Dr. Hannibal Lecter.”

15. “After I give them their eggs, I am taking them back to my planet with me.”

After this photo was taken Eric and Dylan Pasternak were never seen again. We're not sure of what happened to them.

After this photo was taken Eric and Dylan Pasternak were never seen again. We’re not sure of what happened to them or whether they’re still alive.

16. Some parents may make their kids have a picture with the Easter Bunny. Then there are some defying them because they can smell terror.

Run, girl, run for your life. Save yourself while you still can. We all know him giving out eggs with candy in them is just an act.

Run, girl, run for your life. Save yourself while you still can. We all know him giving out eggs with candy in them is just a way to lure children. Of course, he might just be giving her a head start. Some Easter Bunnies just love the sport of the hunt.

17. Of course, we all don’t know what happened to the Kray boys but according to this picture, it seems that he started to nibble on them when someone took this photo.

Lord knows whether these boys' parents are haunted by their screams of, "Don't eat me! Don't eat me!" The horror, the horror.

Lord knows whether these boys’ parents are haunted by their screams of, “Don’t eat me! Don’t eat me!” The horror, the horror.

18. “The child is one of us now.”

And after that, little Timmy was never seen again. His parents are still looking for him.

And after that, little Timmy was never seen again. His parents are still looking for him to this day but they’re beyond all hope finding him.

19. “Mmmmm….this little girl’s hand just tastes scrumptious. I wonder what the rest of her tastes like.”

I have a bad feeling about this situation. I'm sure little Susie is spending a lifetime in therapy by now, if she ever survived. If she did, not sure about the hand.

I have a bad feeling about this situation. I’m sure little Susie is spending a lifetime in therapy by now, if she ever survived. If she did, not sure about the hand.

20. Before Chuck E. Cheese was a mouse, he was a rabbit. Yet, the kids just didn’t seem to warm up to him as a bunny for some reason.

Yeah, I have to agree. As much as I think the animatronic Chuck E. Cheese and all his friends are, they're not nearly as terrifying as this guy.

Yeah, I have to agree. As much as I think the animatronic Chuck E. Cheese and all his friends are, they’re not nearly as terrifying as this guy.

21. “I love babies. Love how they’re so innocent and helpless, which makes them easy prey.”

Baby Ava's parents should just scoop her up quick or else, she might end up as Peter Cottontail's next meal by the looks of it.

Baby Ava’s parents should just scoop her up quick or else, she might end up as Peter Cottontail’s next meal by the looks of it.

22. “So which one of you bitches is coming back to my place tonight?”

While some Easter Bunnies are after the innocent blood of the children, others are just plain perverts who want young women to show them their tits.

While some Easter Bunnies are after the innocent blood of the children, others are just plain perverts who want young women to show them their tits.

23. “I have you now, my pretties.”

This Easter Bunny seems so happy but not in a good way. Seems to enjoy the smell of sweet innocents in the morning.

This Easter Bunny seems so happy but not in a good way. Seems to enjoy the smell of sweet innocents in the morning.

24. Little did Sally and Andy know that there was a giant pink monster behind them.

Maybe it's best to leave the two blissfully unaware of the pink monster gaining up on them. And I certainly don't like the look in his eyes.

Maybe it’s best to leave the two blissfully unaware of the pink monster gaining up on them. And I certainly don’t like the look in his eyes.

25. Easter Bunny or horror movie monster?

I know it's supposed to be a rabbit but it seems that this Easter Bunny seems A. on meth, B. has a day job as a franchise horror movie villain, C. has had his Easter Bunny costume made by someone who thinks he's some burned out rabbit drug fiend, or D. all of the above.

I know it’s supposed to be a rabbit but it seems that this Easter Bunny seems A. on meth, B. has a day job as a franchise horror movie villain, C. has had his Easter Bunny costume made by someone who thinks he’s some burned out rabbit drug fiend, or D. all of the above.

26. “Note to self: perhaps mixing alfalfa with the gin and tonic is probably not a good idea.”

Yeah, that bunny seems to have ventured too far into the pot patch by the looks of it. Either that, or she seems as if she's had a few too many.

Yeah, that bunny seems to have ventured too far into the pot patch by the looks of it. Either that, or she seems as if she’s had a few too many.

27. “Mmmm…I seem to have an acquired taste for little girls. So tasty.”

Tragically, Little Jessica was never seen again after this. Her parents are still looking for her and have started working to keep Easter Bunnies out of playgrounds.

Tragically, Little Jessica was never seen again after this. Her parents are still looking for her and have started working to keep Easter Bunnies out of playgrounds.

28. “Come and play with me, little girl.”

I don't like the look on that bunny's face. I mean it's just as if he wants to have her for dinner in the Donner Party sense. Seems like this little girl doesn't know what she's up against.

I don’t like the look on that bunny’s face. I mean it’s just as if he wants to have her for dinner in the Donner Party sense. Seems like this little girl doesn’t know what she’s up against.

29. Man, this girl must be very brave to keep a straight face while on that Easter Bunny’s lap.

In the words of Tim the Enchanter, "Death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth..."

In the words of Tim the Enchanter, “Death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth…” Also, don’t like the hand placement by the looks of it.

30. Before he had a successful career in movies and played Nucky Thompson in the Emmy-Award winning HBO series Boardwalk Empire, Steve Buscemi would occasionally fill in as an Easter Bunny ast the mall.

Of course, this was how he was discovered by the Coen Brothers who cast him as a villain in several of their films from the 1990s.

Of course, this was how he was discovered by the Coen Brothers who cast him as a villain in several of their films from the 1990s.

31. May I introduce you to the Easter Bunny and his friend Butch. At least I think it’s his friend. Please, be his friend.

"Time for our 12 o'clock paddy cake, tiger." For those who've seen Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, you might know what I'm implying.

“Time for our 12 o’clock paddy cake, tiger.” For those who’ve seen Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, you might know what I’m implying.

32. “Okay, kids, remember what I showed you about how to open a locked car without a key.”

Man, I don't know about you but this Easter Bunny seems like a very bad role model by the looks of it. Please don't trust him with your kids.

Man, I don’t know about you but this Easter Bunny seems like a very bad role model by the looks of it. Please don’t trust him with your kids.

33. Don’t look now, but I think the bunny has just grabbed some unsuspecting kid.

Seriously, that boy must be on something since nobody smiles when a giant ferocious Easter Bunny puts their arms around them before dragging them to their untimely deaths.

Seriously, that boy must be on something since nobody smiles when a giant ferocious Easter Bunny puts their arms around them before dragging them to their untimely deaths.

34. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you the Velveteen Rabbit, from Hell!

Man, and you thought today's costumed Easter Bunnies were horrifying. I mean just look at its souless eyes and long gnashing teeth.

Man, and you thought today’s costumed Easter Bunnies were horrifying. I mean just look at its soulless eyes and long gnashing teeth.

35. Allow me to introduce to you the Easter Bunny and his penguin pal.

I can bet this boy is wetting his pants as we speak. And from the looks of it, I can't decide which one I'd rather sit on for they're both equally nightmare inducing.

I can bet this boy is wetting his pants as we speak. And from the looks of it, I can’t decide which one I’d rather sit on for they’re both equally nightmare inducing.

36. Little does this little boy know about the bespeckled horror behind him.

Mall security, I think we may need a higher and fuller fence. Else, risk a full frontal assault because that rabbit's dynamite.

Mall security, I think we may need a higher and fuller fence. Else, risk a full frontal assault because that rabbit’s dynamite.

37. Of course, delivering eggs to all those kids is exhausting work.

Man, and you thought the Easter Bunny is supposed to be a good role model for children. Don't let those kids catch you with those cigarettes and booze.

Man, and you thought the Easter Bunny is supposed to be a good role model for children. Don’t let those kids catch you with those cigarettes and booze.

38. When not traumatizing kids at the mall, they are hanging out at the Easter office party.

Man, this bunny is just creepy as hell. Bet the woman is just smiling because she's being promised a raise. Yet, this one is guaranteed to devour your soul if you don't get back to work.

Man, this bunny is just creepy as hell. Bet the woman is just smiling because she’s being promised a raise. Yet, this one is guaranteed to devour your soul if you don’t get back to work.

39. Behold, nobody is safe from the attack of Peter Rabbit.

And it seems that this Peter Rabbit seems to find nourishment in the tears of sweet innocent children. Oh, the humanity!

And it seems that this Peter Rabbit seems to find nourishment in the tears of sweet innocent children. Oh, the humanity!

40. Easter Bunny or slasher horror movie villain?

Man, had no idea that homemade paper masks can be so terrifying, especially for a rabbit costume. I wonder what became of those kids.

Man, had no idea that homemade paper masks can be so terrifying, especially for a rabbit costume. I wonder what became of those kids.

41. “I think her liver will go just fine with some fava beans and a fine Chianti.”

This girl on the Bunny's lap is taking this photo op quite well. Yet, this Flopsy seems to have murder on the mind.

This girl on the Bunny’s lap is taking this photo op quite well. Yet, this Flopsy seems to have murder on the mind.

42. Behold, well dressed chocolate bunny on the street.

Okay, not only is this chocolate bunny seems like a substitute teacher from your nightmares, it's actually quite offensive if you see that it's a white guy without makeup, especially without the bunny ears.

Okay, not only is this chocolate bunny seems like a substitute teacher from your nightmares, it’s actually quite offensive if you see that it’s a white guy without makeup, especially without the bunny ears.

43. “If you don’t give me your Social Security number, the number on your bank account and credit cards, and your home alarm code, then you might as well kiss your precious children goodbye.”

Of course, this is the kind of picture you'd send along with a ransom note. Still, this bunny's eyes bear no soul at all.

Of course, this is the kind of picture you’d send along with a ransom note. Still, this bunny’s eyes bear no soul at all.

44. I’m sure having an Easter Bunny dressed as a granny won’t traumatize the kiddies a bit.

Ooops, I was wrong. Still enough to give this little boy nightmares who seems resigned to his inevitable fate at the moment.

Ooops, I was wrong. Still enough to give this little boy nightmares who seems resigned to his inevitable fate at the moment.

45. Easter Bunny or mascot for a fiberglass insulation company?

Of course, I'm not sure if that makes any difference for it seems like this creature seems too cute for a haunted house and too creepy for anything else.

Of course, I’m not sure if that makes any difference for it seems like this creature seems too cute for a haunted house and too creepy for anything else.

46. “I just love it when they scream.”

Because nothing replenishes an Easter Bunny like screams of horror from innocent helpless children.

Because nothing replenishes an Easter Bunny like screams of horror from innocent helpless children.

47. When the Easter Bunny grabbed her basket, suddenly egg hunting didn’t seem like a great idea for little Abigail.

Yeah, I wouldn't want to go egg hunting with this Easter Bunny either, especially one that's likely to appear in children's nightmares.

Yeah, I wouldn’t want to go egg hunting with this Easter Bunny either, especially one that’s likely to appear in children’s nightmares.

48. “You can have her, just please stop looking at us like that.

I'd hate to know what this nefariously pink Peter Cottontail has on his mind. Oh, yes, he's pure evil as you can see in his eyes.

I’d hate to know what this nefariously pink Peter Cottontail has on his mind. Oh, yes, he’s pure evil as you can see in his eyes.

49. Hmm…seems like this Easter Bunny really doesn’t know how to behave during a beauty pageant photo-op.

And the fact he's looking down on a beauty queen who's at least a pre-teen makes this picture all the more cringe worthy.

And the fact he’s looking down on a beauty queen who’s at least a pre-teen makes this picture all the more cringe worthy.

50. I can’t tell whether this bunny is dead or just resting.

Did it just die? Get the kid, he's on a dead bunny! Of course, I also don't like how this bunny has his arm on the boy in this picture. Seriously, why?

Did it just die? Get the kid, he’s on a dead bunny! Of course, I also don’t like how this bunny has his arm on the boy in this picture. Seriously, why?

51. Now that’s now bunny. That’s a giant white sentient peep.

And as a peep, his insides just consist of a concoction of inedible marshmallow and sugar filled with straight up maliciousness.

And as a peep, his insides just consist of a concoction of inedible marshmallow and sugar filled with straight up maliciousness.

52. Either this boy is sitting on the Easter Bunny’s lap or this is a still from a lost Twilight Zone episode that depicted a giant, raging, rabbit psychokiller that preys especially on children.

Either way, this poor boy will have to spend a lifetime of therapy sessions, if he ever survived his encounter. Seriously, that bunny is just horrifying beyond all reason.

Either way, this poor boy will have to spend a lifetime of therapy sessions, if he ever survived his encounter. Seriously, that bunny is just horrifying beyond all reason.

53. Either this Easter Bunny is trying to eat the dog or possibly commit unspeakable acts with it.

Either way, I really don't want to know. Someone please call animal control and remove this creepy rabbit from the premises.

Either way, I really don’t want to know. Someone please call animal control and remove this creepy rabbit from the premises.

54. Unable to wriggle free, the child grimly accepts his fate.

Man, this lady bunny seems to have used way too much eyeliner for some reason. Seriously, that's not cute. That's nightmare inducing terror.

Man, this lady bunny seems to have used way too much eyeliner for some reason. Seriously, that’s not cute. That’s nightmare inducing terror.

55. “Don’t cry running from me, little girl. You parents haven’t paid the ransom yet.”

Since when does an "abduction motif" make for a memorable Easter photo? This is utterly fucked up beyond all imagination? Seriously, why?

Since when does an “abduction motif” make for a memorable Easter photo? This is utterly fucked up beyond all imagination? Seriously, why?

56. Of course, if it weren’t for the drug charges, Cottontail would still be taking photo ops with children instead of dogs.

"Dude, I can totally go for some of those leafy vegetables in Mr. MacGregor's rad basement right now. Of course, eating them makes me so hungry and tripping balls."

“Dude, I can totally go for some of those leafy vegetables in Mr. MacGregor’s rad basement right now. Of course, eating them makes me so hungry and tripping balls.”

57. Of course, Larry decided to work as an Easter Bunny after he accidentally bleached his Bigfoot costume.

Yeah, that totally looks like a white rabbit. Well, the ears at least. Not sure about the rest of him. Seems more like a monster you'd have if the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland mated with Chewbacca.

Yeah, that totally looks like a white rabbit. Well, the ears at least. Not sure about the rest of him. Seems more like a monster you’d have if the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland mated with Chewbacca.

58. “Hey, kid, touch my carrot, will you?”

Due to the unfortunate carrot placement and the creepy look on that bunny's face, then no, kid. Absolutely not. Just run away like hell, kid. Seriously, you don't want to know what this bunny is up to.

Due to the unfortunate carrot placement and the creepy look on that bunny’s face, then no, kid. Absolutely not. Just run away like hell, kid. Seriously, you don’t want to know what this bunny is up to.

59. Don’t look now, but I don’t think this bunny is doing anything lawful on the premises.

If you see an Easter Bunny that looks like this on your lawn, you might want to call the cops in your area. Seriously, do it before he steals something.

If you see an Easter Bunny that looks like this on your lawn, you might want to call the cops in your area. Seriously, do it before he steals something like your car keys.

60. “Mind if I cut in, ladies?”

Sure these women may be smiling but there's something not right about this bunny's facial expression. I mean he just seems to have a face of someone subject to a sexual harassment lawsuit.

Sure these women may be smiling but there’s something not right about this bunny’s facial expression. I mean he just seems to have a face of someone subject to a sexual harassment lawsuit.

61. Of course, it isn’t uncommon for some Easter Bunnies to visit retirement homes.

Now this old lady is like, "Back off, boy, or I'll put you in a world by running over you with my walker. Kepeche?"

Now this old lady is like, “Back off, boy, or I’ll put you in a world by running over you with my walker. Kepeche?”

62. “I am the easter bunny dammit, respect me or I eat the child.”

And looking at his evil, soulless, eyes, I don't think he's kidding. And I'm not sure if this boy is aware of what's going on.

And looking at his evil, soulless, eyes, I don’t think he’s kidding. And I’m not sure if this boy is aware of what’s going on.

63. What’s odd about this Easter Bunny is that he doesn’t seem too fond of children.

"God dammit, I only did this for the money! If I have to see one more kid sit on my lap, then I'm not sure what I'll do. Now where my Jack Daniels and 10 cent hooker they promised me?"

“God dammit, I only did this for the money! If I have to see one more kid sit on my lap, then I’m not sure what I’ll do. Now where my Jack Daniels and 10 cent hooker they promised me?”

64.By the look of his eyes, this rabbit definitely has a nose candy problem.

Okay, I think this rabbit is just plain terrifying. By the way, despite the kid having a butch haircut, that's definitely a girl because little boys didn't wear puffy sleeves like that in the day.

Okay, I think this rabbit is just plain terrifying, especially where he has his hands. By the way, despite the kid having a butch haircut, that’s definitely a girl because little boys didn’t wear puffy sleeves like that in the day.

65. By the looks of it, you’d think the Easter Bunny was plotting to kill Superman.

Of course, what makes this even more cringe worthy is that George Reeves actually died of a gunshot wound under some mysterious circumstances. But I'm surprised why the Easter Bunny was never a murder suspect.

Of course, what makes this even more cringe worthy is that George Reeves actually died of a gunshot wound under some mysterious circumstances. But I’m surprised why the Easter Bunny was never a murder suspect.

66. “I give you eggs and candy in your Easter basket, you give me booze. Do we have deal?”

Looking at the bunny's face, you can tell he has a serious drinking problem. Maybe he should lay off on the mint juleps for awhile.

Looking at the bunny’s face, you can tell he has a serious drinking problem. Maybe he should lay off on the mint juleps for awhile.

67. “I’ve got plans for you, Goldilocks.”

"That's right, be a good little girl and eat these carrots. Else, you'll make a lovely addition in my rabbit stew and I'm sure you don't want that to happen."

“That’s right, be a good little girl and eat these carrots. Else, you’ll make a lovely addition in my rabbit stew and I’m sure you don’t want that to happen.”

68. Okay, maybe this whole inter-species romance thing isn’t a great idea, especially if one of them is a giant 6 foot rabbit.

While Roger and Jessica Rabbit might make a cute couple, understand that they're cartoons. Such Rabbit and human relations in real life would be quite terrifying according to this. I mean, rabbits were never meant to be sexy.

While Roger and Jessica Rabbit might make a cute couple, understand that they’re cartoons. Such Rabbit and human relations in real life would be quite terrifying according to this. I mean, rabbits were never meant to be sexy.

69. Easter Bunny or old timey villain with a double mustache?

Yeah, I'm sure this bunny doesn't seem like he could go on homicidal warpath and kill a bunch of teenagers. Yeah right.

Yeah, I’m sure this bunny doesn’t seem like he could go on homicidal warpath and kill a bunch of teenagers. Yeah right.

70. Dr. Moreau Pig/Bunny Atrocity Mask? Check!  Costume on backwards? Check! Suspect location? Check! Happy Easter.

Yeah, wearing a bunny costume backwards really doesn't make this bunny less scary. Of course, the mask really inspires a slew of eternal nightmares.

Yeah, wearing a bunny costume backwards really doesn’t make this bunny less scary. Of course, the mask really inspires a slew of eternal nightmares.

71. Of course, since pink is a festive Easter color, maybe pink bunnies aren’t so bad.

I was wrong since this one completely scares the bejesus out of anyone who dares looks into her soulless eyes. Also, I bet the boy probably needs some brown pants by now.

I was wrong since this one completely scares the bejesus out of anyone who dares looks into her soulless eyes. Also, I bet the boy probably needs some brown pants by now.

72. “Go, ahead, kid touch the carrot, will you?”

Oh, hell, no. Please don't, kid. Just don't. I have a bad feeling about this. Seriously, those eyes bear no sense of kindness whatsoever.

Oh, hell, no. Please don’t, kid. Just don’t. I have a bad feeling about this. Seriously, those eyes bear no sense of kindness whatsoever.

73. “Oh, yes, little one, come to me. You will be assimilated.”

Okay, I know this is supposed to depict a sweet, heartwarming moment. But I just can't help but cringe when looking at this. Seriously, that bunny is terrifying.

Okay, I know this is supposed to depict a sweet, heartwarming moment. But I just can’t help but cringe when looking at this. Seriously, that bunny is terrifying.

74. I’m not sure this girl should reach into that Easter basket. Must be desperate for Easter goodies.

Seems like she was a bit desperate. Of course, this is how an Easter Bunny like that would try to ensnare its prey. Yeah, that girl may never be seen again anytime soon.

Seems like she was a bit desperate. Of course, this is how an Easter Bunny like that would try to ensnare its prey. Yeah, that girl may never be seen again anytime soon.

75. Now that looks like a cross between the Easter Bunny and the Abominable Snowman.

Now if it weren't for the long ears, I would've sworn it was some kind of homicidal monster from a children's cartoon of some sort.

Now if it weren’t for the long ears, I would’ve sworn it was some kind of homicidal monster from a children’s cartoon of some sort.

76. They say if you can look into his eyes, you can see the fiery depths of Hell itself.

Either that, or it resembles the Trix Rabbit after he stopped craving cereal and started abusing psychoactive and hallucinogenic drugs like meth, for instance.

Either that, or it resembles the Trix Rabbit after he stopped craving cereal and started abusing psychoactive and hallucinogenic drugs like meth, for instance.

77. For children who prefer their six-foot rabbits more nightmarishly realistic.

Of course, this child is probably going to experience a lifetime of giant bunny nightmares. Yet, I'm not sure whether this one laughs maniacally or not.

Of course, this child is probably going to experience a lifetime of giant bunny nightmares. Yet, I’m not sure whether this one laughs maniacally or not.

78. Of course, many people say that 2 Easter Bunnies are better than one.

Okay, I'm sorry. I was wrong. They're actually quite terrifying. And I'm sure that there's no escape for screaming baby Julie on the lady bunny's laugh.

Okay, I’m sorry. I was wrong. They’re actually quite terrifying. And I’m sure that there’s no escape for screaming baby Julie on the lady bunny’s laugh. Of course, I could see these two laughing maniacally on the whole thing.

79. “The child is mine. All mine. Nah hah hah hah hah.”

I guess this child is beyond hope when it comes to getting away from arms of the fluffy pink and white monstrosity.

I guess this child is beyond hope when it comes to getting away from arms of the fluffy pink and white monstrosity.

80. When not having kids sit on his lap, this Easter Bunny likes to hang out at the club.

I'm not sure why he's a hit with the ladies because that evil, soulless face is more appropriate for a horror movie. Seriously, I really don't like the looks of him.

I’m not sure why he’s a hit with the ladies because that evil, soulless face is more appropriate for a horror movie. Seriously, I really don’t like the looks of him.

Easter Greetings from the Days of Yesteryear

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While not a big card exchange holiday like Christmas and Valentine’s Day as well as perhaps Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, there are some people who take part of this tradition which was started in the 19th century. Many of these cards contain a variety of Easter motifs like bunnies, chicks, eggs, crosses, and what not. Of course, as with anything from more than a generation ago, Easter cards also may have a tendency to receive their share of nostalgia since many of them have artistic illustrations attached to them. Now I can go on all about the great vintage Easter greeting cards out there. But I know that would be boring so I’ll show you some Easter cards that would make us ask what the hell our ancestors were thinking or how did they ever think it was a good idea. Some of them might seem creepy by our standards as well as unintentionally funny. So maybe a vintage Easter card of Jesus as a shepherd is probably a better card to send, even if your friends aren’t Christian, compared to this bunch. So without further ado, here are some not so cutesy Easter cards from yesterday.

1. Happy Easter from the hatching Easter baby.

And this is why we need biology class as well as sex education in schools. Seriously, mammals are placental animals that don't lay eggs.

And this is why we need biology class as well as sex education in schools. Seriously, mammals are placental animals that don’t lay eggs.

2. Loving Easter Greetings, now watch what those chicks can do with that rabbit.

Man, it must suck being a rabbit in a chick circus. Seriously, nobody wants to get pussy willow whipped under the big top.

Man, it must suck being a rabbit in a chick circus. Seriously, nobody wants to get pussy willow whipped under the big top.

3. Easter greetings from an unhinged rabbit performance of Wuthering Heights performed from within giant egg.

Honestly, I really don't want to know what's going on there. And for those who know the story of Wuthering Heights, remember Cathy and Heathcliff's screaming dysfunctional relationship doesn't end well.

Honestly, I really don’t want to know what’s going on there. And for those who know the story of Wuthering Heights, remember Cathy and Heathcliff’s screaming dysfunctional relationship doesn’t end well.

4. Happy Easter from some creepy woman in egg holding an egg.

I wonder what kind of drugs these French photographers and card designers were on to produce such crazy cards like these. Maybe absinthe isn't as safe as it's said to be.

I wonder what kind of drugs these French photographers and card designers were on to produce such crazy cards like these. Maybe absinthe isn’t as safe as it’s said to be.

5. Happy Easter from the two cats who decided to paint a hatching egg.

"Sure the egg might've hatched while we were painting it, Joey. But look on the bright side, at least we're having baby rotisserie chicken tonight."

“Sure the egg might’ve hatched while we were painting it, Joey. But look on the bright side, at least we’re having baby rotisserie chicken tonight.”

6. Happy Easter from a German soldier, an Austro-Hungarian infantryman, and the Easter Bunny?

Man, seeing the Easter Bunny hanging out the the Central Powers. Let's hope Santa Claus is on the Allies' side or else a bunch a soldiers are sure going to be disappointed.

Man, seeing the Easter Bunny hanging out the the Central Powers. Let’s hope Santa Claus is on the Allies’ side or else a bunch a soldiers are sure going to be disappointed.

7. Easter greetings from the colorful, egg shell wearing, dancing bunny cult.

Who knew that old fashioned card artists could make bunnies and eggs so terrifying. Could possibly serve as an inspiration for a Donnie Darko poster.

Who knew that old fashioned card artists could make bunnies and eggs so terrifying. Could possibly serve as an inspiration for a Donnie Darko poster.

8. “Okay, Henny Penny, I spared your last chick now repay me by laying your next egg in the frying pan. Breakfast doesn’t cook itself, you know.”

In the world of vintage cards, this is "breakfast." In the world of poultry, this is Sophie's Choice.

In the world of vintage cards, this is “breakfast.” In the world of poultry, this is Sophie’s Choice.

9. Happy Easter this spring from the Easter Puck.

While the Prince of Darkness may inhabit the fiery regions of Hell, he sure does enjoy frolicking among the white daffodils during the spring.

While the Prince of Darkness may inhabit the fiery regions of Hell, he sure does enjoy frolicking among the white daffodils during the spring. Still, don’t want to see this during the Easter egg hunt.

10. Nothing says Easter like a visit from the ghost dad who went to fight on the Western Front.

Hmm...German soldier dad with Kaiser helmet watching over Easter Bunny with his children. Creepy.

Hmm…German soldier dad with Kaiser helmet watching over Easter Bunny with his children. Creepy.

11. Happy Easter from the egg carrying, umbrella wielding chicken lady.

Okay, that's going to give your kid nightmares. Of course, she's about to whack that bunny with her umbrella over the abduction of one of her unborn children.

Okay, that’s going to give your kid nightmares. Of course, she’s about to whack that bunny with her umbrella over the abduction of one of her unborn children.

12. Happy Easter from the chick preying bunny from Hell!

I hate to think what this evil eyed Easter bunny wants to do with this chick. Seems like he's saying, "I have plans for you, goldilocks."

I hate to think what this evil eyed Easter bunny wants to do with this chick. Seems like he’s saying, “I have plans for you, Goldilocks.”

13. An Easter greeting from the bunny regiment and their enslaved chicken.

Yes, I'm sure those eggs are from those the enslaved chicken laid which they're now using as artillery shells. Also, did I tell you that the chicken sort of resembles a rooster?

Yes, I’m sure those eggs are from those the enslaved chicken laid which they’re now using as artillery shells. Also, did I tell you that the chicken sort of resembles a rooster?

14. Easter greetings from the egg that inspired Hannibal Lecter.

How could any card company ever think this illustration is a good idea? I mean it has a picture of an anthropomorphic egg having it's guts eaten out of him.

How could any card company ever think this illustration is a good idea? I mean it has a picture of an anthropomorphic egg having it’s guts eaten out of him.

15. Happy Easter from creepy rabbit girl.

Okay, compared to the Donnie Darko rabbit and this girl in a rabbit costume, the creepy rabbit girl wins every time when it comes to inducing nightmares.

Okay, compared to the Donnie Darko rabbit and this girl in a rabbit costume, the creepy rabbit girl wins every time when it comes to inducing nightmares.

16. “All right, who’s been cracking the eggs in this basket?”

Okay, this card carries some unfortunate implications we need not discuss right now. Of course, those 2 eggs breaking might've been an accident but it's not stopping the chick soldiers from chirping like mad.

Okay, this card carries some unfortunate implications we need not discuss right now. Of course, those 2 eggs breaking might’ve been an accident but it’s not stopping the chick soldiers from chirping like mad.

17. “So remember kids, babies come from giant chicken eggs, okay?”

Do I need to remind anyone why sex ed is required in high schools across America? Seriously, this is fucked up. I mean what the hell was this designer on when he thought up this?

Do I need to remind anyone why sex ed is required in high schools across America? Seriously, this is fucked up. I mean what the hell was this designer on when he thought up this?

18. “By the way, Jimmy, this is a hard egg to crack so we must use hammers.”

Still, I wonder where these girls got their chicken costumes from. Oh, I think I can guess. Oh, my God, that's disturbing! And there the yellow chick sits helplessly by to watch.

Still, I wonder where these girls got their chicken costumes from. Oh, I think I can guess. Oh, my God, that’s disturbing! And there the yellow chick sits helplessly by to watch.

19. “Get off my lawn, you floppy eared, patted food, egg stealing punk, Peter Cottontail!”

Also serves as a great PSA on why we need stricter gun laws. Yep, nothing says Easter like a chick using his God given Second Amendment Right of standing his ground.

Also serves as a great PSA on why we need stricter gun laws. Yep, nothing says Easter like a chick using his God given Second Amendment Right of standing his ground.

20. Apparently, Easter isn’t always welcome in places like the swamp since the frogs and the bees are total bullies.

By the way, are the frogs flinging mud or poo? I can't really be sure. Besides, bees aren't that big unless they've been exposed to radiation, perhaps, but I don't want to think about it.

By the way, are the frogs flinging mud or poo? I can’t really be sure. Besides, bees aren’t that big unless they’ve been exposed to radiation, perhaps, but I don’t want to think about it.

21. “Happy Easter, and remove the ladder please.”

Unfortunately, Billy would drown in an array of egg white and yoke as well as willful negligence from his friends.

Unfortunately, Billy would drown in an array of egg white and yoke as well as willful negligence from his friends.

22. Happy Easter with love from the office chick couple.

Seems like someone in the back isn't happy for these 2 lovebirds and seems like it's contemplating revenge of some sort.

Seems like someone in the back isn’t happy for these 2 lovebirds and seems like it’s contemplating revenge of some sort.

23. Now these two chicks seem to have a nice Easter morning walk.

Okay, now the guy chick is smoking in a suit. The female chick has a bit of her shell attached to her ass. So does that mean she's not long hatched and that there's a bit of sugar daddery going on?

Okay, now the guy chick is smoking in a suit. The female chick has a bit of her shell attached to her ass. So does that mean she’s not long hatched and that there’s a bit of sugar daddery going on?

24. “Here, boy, here’s a lovely Easter egg to give to your mother.”

Remember, kids, don't ever accept Easter eggs from strange rabbits. Seriously, you have no idea what their agenda is. Besides, the kid is creepy.

Remember, kids, don’t ever accept Easter eggs from strange rabbits. Seriously, you have no idea what their agenda is. Besides, the kid is creepy.

25. Good wishes, this Easter, unless you’re the chick in the stew pot.

Now this is quite disturbing. Aren't the other two chicks going to help their friend? Or is the one chick like, "Sorry, but there's a Breaking Bad marathon on AMC."

Now this is quite disturbing. Aren’t the other two chicks going to help their friend? Or is the one chick like, “Sorry, but there’s a Breaking Bad marathon on AMC.”

26. Happy Easter by the creepy gnome painting Easter eggs.

Don't like the look on that guy's face. Also, I have a bad feeling about the chicks surrounding him who seem fatally attracted to the color red for some reason.

Don’t like the look on that guy’s face. Also, I have a bad feeling about the chicks surrounding him who seem fatally attracted to the color red for some reason.

27. “Happy Easter and you can have my Easter eggs if you can pry them from my cold dead hands.”

Would great movie poster. I can see it now. Easter Bunny's Revenge: It's rabbit season, folks, but this time it's man whose the hunted.

Would great movie poster. I can see it now. Easter Bunny’s Revenge: It’s rabbit season, folks, but this time it’s man whose the hunted.

28. Happy Easter and all hail the giant newly hatched chick.

Now I'm not sure why these people have to dance around the chick. Must be some sort of cult ritual before they sacrifice it by setting the nest on fire.

Now I’m not sure why these people have to dance around the chick. Must be some sort of cult ritual before they sacrifice it by setting the nest on fire.

29. Easter greetings from the gnome flower house.

"Come in and make yourself at home. Of course, I'm not going steal your eggs or make you into rabbit stew." I have a bad feeling about this since the gnome is just terrifying.

“Come in and make yourself at home. Of course, I’m not going steal your eggs or make you into rabbit stew.” I have a bad feeling about this since the gnome is just terrifying.

30. In the latest of baby chicken transportation, I know give you the rabbit and egg shell carrier.

The rabbit seems dead inside. Also, I'm sure egg shells are very fragile and don't make good containers. Just saying.

The rabbit seems dead inside. Also, I’m sure egg shells are very fragile and don’t make good containers. Just saying.

31. These rabbits wish you a happy Easter greeting.

And by "greeting," the mean, "we will kill you. Possibly stuff and mount you while we're at it."

And by “greeting,” the mean, “we will kill you. Possibly stuff and mount you while we’re at it.”

32. Happy Easter from the red eyed killer bunnies of infernal doom.

"We're here to eat your cute little chicks or possibly stun you with our laser eyes." Either way, these cute little chicks are going to be nuggets once these bunnies are done with them.

“We’re here to eat your cute little chicks or possibly stun you with our laser eyes.” Either way, these cute little chicks are going to be nuggets once these bunnies are done with them.

33. With best Easter wishes, let’s destroy these multicolored eggs from the nest by dumping them on these birds. It will be fun.

Obviously, whoever illustrated this cared either hated birds or didn't think this one through. Bunch of brats.

Obviously, whoever illustrated this cared either hated birds or didn’t think this one through. Bunch of brats.

34. Celebrate Easter like these two chickies would, getting drunk.

The one with the bottle is destined to become the famed rooster His Royal Majesty Rex Goliath who would reach a whopping 47 pounds as "the World's Largest Rooster" and have a wine company named after him in California.

The one with the bottle is destined to become the famed rooster His Royal Majesty Rex Goliath who would reach a whopping 47 pounds as “the World’s Largest Rooster” and have a wine company named after him in California.

35. “You know these hens don’t just produce great artillery shells. They also are great for transporting cannons.”

Seriously, what's with all this Easter motifs with battle implements? It's like having a card with a picture of a commando Easter Bunny in camo carrying an AK-47! I mean, why?

Seriously, what’s with all this Easter motifs with battle implements? It’s like having a card with a picture of a commando Easter Bunny in camo carrying an AK-47! I mean, why?

36. On Easter, it’s not uncommon to see upright rabbits playing tennis with colored Easter eggs.

"It's a good thing these eggs are hard boiled and covered in latex. Else, we'd have a slimy situation on our hands."

“It’s a good thing these eggs are hard boiled and covered in latex. Else, we’d have a slimy situation on our hands.”

37. Nothing says Easter like a boy putting the moves on a girl in a giant eggshell boat rowed by a rabbit.

I bet this rabbit is like, "Get a room, you two." Still, how old are these kids supposed to be? I mean this is kind of disturbing.

I bet this rabbit is like, “Get a room, you two.” Still, how old are these kids supposed to be? I mean this is kind of disturbing if you ask me.

38. Happy Easter from the whole family.

Okay, now let me get this straight. This family consists of a rabbit dad and chick mom with two rabbit boys and a baby chick. So how does that happen?

Okay, now let me get this straight. This family consists of a rabbit dad and chick mom with two rabbit boys and a baby chick. So how does that happen? I have nothing against depicting inter-species relationships in greeting cards but this is ridiculous.

39. Remember parents, don’t leave your baby unattended with an egg basket. Because small children can easily fall prey to monstrous chicks.

I don't like the look of the three chicks congregating like they're straight out of Goodfellas. Luckily, baby has a pussy willow in hand for self-defense.

I don’t like the look of the three chicks congregating like they’re straight out of Goodfellas. Luckily, baby has a pussy willow in hand for self-defense.

40. Didn’t know that the Easter Bunny traveled on a plane made from pink spring flowers.

I wonder what kind of drugs this illustrator was tripping on to come up with this? Seriously, why does this even exist?

I wonder what kind of drugs this illustrator was tripping on to come up with this? Seriously, why does this even exist?

41. Happy Easter from the naked lady hatching from the giant egg.

Since how does this capture the message of Easter? Seriously, you wonder that such cards of strange women hatching from eggs exist mainly as fanservice. You know, the kind of cards young men would send to their fellow frat brothers.

Since how does this capture the message of Easter? Seriously, you wonder that such cards of strange women hatching from eggs exist mainly as fanservice. You know, the kind of cards young men would send to their fellow frat brothers.

42. Happy Easter from the Easter egg girl.

Seriously, I'm at a loss for words with this one. Also, I don't think that little girl's dress is appropriate attire either. I mean, why?

Seriously, I’m at a loss for words with this one. Also, I don’t think that little girl’s dress is appropriate attire either. I mean, why?

43. Easter greetings from the chickies and the boy who’s about to kill their newly hatched friend with a paddle.

I don't know about you but I think the chicks need to clear out right now because there's a paddle wielding boy with murder on the mind.

I don’t know about you but I think the chicks need to clear out right now because there’s a paddle wielding boy with murder on the mind.

44. Nothing says Easter like a newly hatched babe in the river.

Now this is crazy. And no, gorgeous women don't emerge from eggs! Seriously, why?

Now this is crazy. And no, gorgeous women don’t emerge from eggs! Else, Sports Illustrated and Playboy would’ve started their own egg hatching programs. Seriously, why?

45. Here comes Peter Cottontail, hopping down the bunny trail. Hippity, hoppity, Easter’s on its-Holy shit, is that blood in that bucket?

Seems like Peter Cottontail murdered his boss and is now gleefully painting the town with his blood, literally. What a sadistic, homicidal rabbit.

Seems like Peter Cottontail murdered his boss and is now gleefully painting the town with his blood, literally. What a sadistic, homicidal rabbit.

46. Seems like this chick has taken habit to riding and smoking.

Bizarre_Vintage_Easter_Card_1_jpg

So I suppose this card shows how barnyard chicks really start early. Still, not sure which is freakier, the smoking or the riding habit.

47. This Easter, may you find an Easter Bunny within a colored egg.

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Sorry, kids, but I’m afraid rabbit reproduction just doesn’t work that way. Rabbits give birth to live young and don’t emerge fully formed. Yeah, way to go with telling misleading information on rabbit biology. Also, is its ear bleeding?

48. Nothing makes a more adorable Easter card than a child covering a rabbit’s eyes.

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Then again, those rabbit eyes seem to tell us that it’s pure evil and might kill us as we speak. The kid looks pretty creepy as well.

49. Nothing brings the spirit of Easter than a card depicting bunnies smoking flowers with pipes.

vintage-Easter-postcard-funny-rabbits-smoking-flowers-egg-pipes_jpg

Now they use egg shells for their pipe ends. Still, that must be strong stuff that their smoking. Also, you have to wonder what the designer was smoking to come up with this idea. Seriously why?

50. May your Easter greetings bring you great joy this spring.

free-vintage-easter-clip-art-pink-egg-three-tabby-kittens

Unfortunately for this chick, once it gets out of its shell, it won’t have a long to live. Because these cats seem to eye it as if they’re waiting for their next meal.

Hop Down the Bunny Trail for These Easter Treats

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As most of us now know, Easter doesn’t come until April. But since this is almost halfway through Lent, I might as well get my Easter articles out of the way. Now Easter is a very important day on the Christian calendar since it denotes the resurrection of Jesus Christ after he was crucified, died, and was buried. Yet, as with Christmas, people also add their own touches with this holiday as well such as bunnies, baskets, chicks, sheep, flowers, parades, and colored eggs. Of course, there’s also the Easter Bunny as well as egg hunts and sometimes family gatherings since it’s more of a family holiday. So it’s no surprise that there’s a lot of food associated with it such as ham, bunny cake, and hot crossed buns. Cultures may vary. So without further adieu, I give you an assortment of cute little Easter treats you can’t resist.

1. If you think a bunny cake is too difficult you can always do a bird nest cake.

Now that's a big nest for so many little pastel peanut M&M eggs. Also, I don't think you can eat the bird.

Now that’s a big nest for so many little pastel peanut M&M eggs. Also, I don’t think you can eat the bird.

2. Bring spring into your life with these adorable chicks cookie macarons.

Not sure of what to think of macarons, yet these yellow chicks are just simply adorable. Seriously, look into their eyes and you just want to eat them up.

Not sure of what to think of macarons, yet these yellow chicks are just simply adorable. Seriously, look into their eyes and you just want to eat them up.

3. Make your Easter memorable with these springtime cupcakes.

Now these motifs consist of eggs, baskets, and flowers. Yet some of them have spring designs on them as well.

Now these motifs consist of eggs, baskets, and flowers. Yet some of them have spring designs on them as well.

4. For those who want to eat healthy, you might want to go with an Easter Bunny fruit tray.

Now this cantaloupe bunny is actually quite terrifying if you ask me. Seems like it's escaped from the bunny insane asylum and is out to kill again.

Now this cantaloupe bunny is actually quite terrifying if you ask me. Seems like it’s escaped from the bunny insane asylum and is out to kill again.

5. Treat yourself on Easter with an egg salad ham sandwich.

As with "egg" I mean a decorated one inscribed on top of the bread. Now isn't that festive?

As with “egg” I mean a decorated one inscribed on top of the bread. Now isn’t that festive? Yet I’m not sure whether that’s icing or ketchup and pineapple.

6. For your little bunnies this Easter, I’m sure these carrot patch cupcakes will do quite nicely.

Of course, the carrots may not be real yet they seem like something you'd see right out of some children's story. Nevertheless, at least they're chocolate.

Of course, the carrots may not be real yet they seem like something you’d see right out of some children’s story. Nevertheless, at least they’re chocolate.

7. For your Easter dinner, you can’t do wrong with a veggie egg pizza.

Now this is just perfect which includes purple cauliflower, green onion, yellow peppers, and carrots, a food rabbits are usually seen eating.

Now this is just perfect which includes purple cauliflower, green onion, yellow peppers, and carrots, a food rabbits are usually seen eating.

8. For those who like Easter bonnets, these cupcakes are for you.

Now these bonnets are quite pretty yet, they're technically hats since they have brims. Real bonnets don't.

Now these bonnets are quite pretty yet, they’re technically hats since they have brims. Real bonnets don’t.

9. Seems like the Easter Bunny needs to sort out his carrot supply.

And you thought that Bugs Bunny had problems with storage space. Hey, at least Bugs doesn't have decorated eggs as well.

And you thought that Bugs Bunny had problems with storage space. Hey, at least Bugs doesn’t have decorated eggs as well.

10. Make your Easter memorable with this Easter bonnet veggie and snack tray.

Wonder how they manage to get the dip like that, I will never know. Yet, I like how they used a carrot peel as a ribbon.

Wonder how they manage to get the dip like that, I will never know. Yet, I like how they used a carrot peel as a ribbon.

11. If you can’t make an Easter egg veggie pizza, carrot ones may do.

All the toppings here are broccoli and carrots. So this is much simpler to make than the Easter egg one, but much less impressive.

All the toppings here are broccoli and carrots. So this is much simpler to make than the Easter egg one, but much less impressive.

12. What better Easter appetizer to have than chicks popping out of hardboiled eggs?

Of course, these are the kind of treats that may seem quite cute at first but when you think about it, not so much. Seriously, most of the eggs we use come from chickens.

Of course, these are the kind of treats that may seem quite cute at first but when you think about it, not so much. Seriously, most of the eggs we use come from chickens.

13. If working with Rice Krispies, you can make eggs with M&Ms hidden inside them.

It helps that Rice Krispie treats are just so easy to make and that you don't have to bake them in the oven. Otherwise, the M&M candies would melt.

It helps that Rice Krispie treats are just so easy to make and that you don’t have to bake them in the oven. Otherwise, the M&M candies would melt.

14. Nothing makes Easter more worthwhile than bunny buns.

Now  these may take time to make but they're nevertheless adorable beyond compare.

Now these may take time to make but they’re nevertheless adorable beyond compare. They must taste good, too.

15. If Easter bread isn’t available, then bunny bread loaves will do.

Now I'm sure they may not be cute buns but they're certainly adorable. That is until they actually get sliced and eaten.

Now I’m sure they may not be cute buns but they’re certainly adorable. That is until they actually get sliced and eaten.

16. You simply can’t have Easter unless you have bunny sugar cookies.

Sure they may look like the other rabbit baked goods but they're so adorable. Just have to love their little eyes and ears.

Sure they may look like the other rabbit baked goods but they’re so adorable. Just have to love their little eyes and ears.

17. Since the previous bunny fruit tray was quite creepy, here is one your kids will enjoy.

Now this pineapple rabbit is much better even if the fruit choices are much more limited to pineapple, blueberries, strawberries, and kiwi.

Now this pineapple rabbit is much better even if the fruit choices are much more limited to pineapple, blueberries, strawberries, and kiwi.

18. For your veggie tray, you can’t do wrong with putting a dip tray in a bread bunny.

Now this rabbit might not have its ears sticking out and may prefer celery. But it's so cute.

Now this rabbit might not have its ears sticking out and may prefer celery. But it’s so cute.

19. Of course, no Easter would be complete without a bunny cake.

Now this is how a traditional bunny cake is made. Only takes two cakes and a simple design.

Now this is how a traditional bunny cake is made. Only takes two cakes and a simple design.

20. Bring spring into your life with these garden cupcakes.

Now the chocolate content is fine. Of course, the flowers aren't usually planted with the carrots and lettuce.

Now the chocolate content is fine. Of course, the flowers aren’t usually planted with the carrots and lettuce.

21. You can also dip Rice Krispies Easter eggs in icing.

You can also decorate them with sprinkles of all types. Not sure if they have candy in them but they're quite adorable.

You can also decorate them with sprinkles of all types. Not sure if they have candy in them but they’re quite adorable.

22. Bring Easter into your life with these yellow chick cake pops.

Not sure if they're chocolate on the inside which might not be likely. Yet, these are certainly adorable.

Not sure if they’re chocolate on the inside which might not be likely. Yet, these are certainly adorable.

23. If you have Oreos than make them into chicks and lambs.

Of course, this would mean dipping them in icing as well as decorating them. However, they're still quite adorable.

Of course, this would mean dipping them in icing as well as decorating them. However, they’re still quite adorable.

24. Nothing says Easter like these carrot garden cookie treats.

Of course, this isn't how people grow carrots where I live. Yet, such garden would be quite messy to reenact with food.

Of course, this isn’t how people grow carrots where I live. Yet, such garden would be quite messy to reenact with food.

25. To get in the Easter spirit, I’m sure these assorted cupcakes will do quite nicely.

These consist of flowers in grass, pink roses, bunnies, Easter bonnets, and Easter eggs. But they're so cute enough to eat.

These consist of flowers in grass, pink roses, bunnies, Easter bonnets, and Easter eggs. But they’re so cute enough to eat.

26. Now these Easter bunny rolls are simply delightful.

Now these bunnies are so adorable with their little ears and cotton tail. Hate to see them get eaten though.

Now these bunnies are so adorable with their little ears and cotton tail. Hate to see them get eaten though.

27. If you don’t like bunny buns for Easter, then I’m sure duck rolls will do.

Of course, you wouldn't tell they're ducks except with their position and almond beaks. But they're so adorable.

Of course, you wouldn’t tell they’re ducks except with their position and almond beaks. But they’re so adorable.

28. For your kids, a bunny sandwich will sure make a fine Easter lunch.

Now this bunny face includes cucumbers, carrots, cherry tomato, egg, onions, and peas. Still, adorable.

Now this bunny face includes cucumbers, carrots, cherry tomato, egg, onions, and peas. Still, adorable.

29. Since spring brings flowers, these flower cupcakes will do nicely.

They flowers may be made from marshmallows, sugar, and jelly beans. But they sure are pretty.

They flowers may be made from marshmallows, sugar, and jelly beans. But they sure are pretty.

30. If a bunny cake seems too easy for you this Easter, then you can’t do wrong with an egg cake.

Either this is professionally made or someone must've had too much time on their hands. But these chick cupcakes are so adorable.

Either this is professionally made or someone must’ve had too much time on their hands. But these chick cupcakes are so adorable.

31. For those who love flowers, these flower basket cupcakes will make your Easter spring.

The best part of these is that they're chocolate. The flowers are probably made from sugar but they're so pretty.

The best part of these is that they’re chocolate. The flowers are probably made from sugar but they’re so pretty.

32. If you think cupcakes are too complicated, you can always make cookie Easter basket cookies.

Now these consist of vanilla sandwich cookies, Twizzlers, and rainbow Nerds candies. And the best part is, you don't have to use an oven.

Now these consist of vanilla sandwich cookies, Twizzlers, and rainbow Nerds candies. And the best part is, you don’t have to use an oven.

33. For a healthy Easter lunch your kids will love, here is an Easter Bunny sandwich.

Now the ears are made from banana while the sandwich uses 2 types of bread. Nevertheless, this is adorable.

Now the ears are made from banana while the sandwich uses 2 types of bread. Nevertheless, this is adorable.

34. Have your kids hop along the bunny trail with this quality Easter lunch.

Seems like this lunch is all bunnied up with a rabbit going down its hole sandwich, a rabbit egg and jello, rabbit cheese crackers, and some carrots in raisin dirt.

Seems like this lunch is all bunnied up with a rabbit going down its hole sandwich, a rabbit egg and jello, rabbit cheese crackers, and some carrots in raisin dirt.

35. You can either buy a chocolate bunny for Easter or make one with chocolate Rice Krispies and melted marshmallow.

Of course, with Rice Krispie chocolate bunnies you can select either your own creamy filling or none at all.

Of course, with Rice Krispie chocolate bunnies you can select either your own creamy filling or none at all.

36. You can also use Rice Krispies with Nutella to make Easter bird nest treats.

And I see here that this person used peanut M&Ms as eggs since I could recognize the colors for their Easter assortment.

And I see here that this person used peanut M&Ms as eggs since I could recognize the colors for their Easter assortment.

37. If you don’t feel like baking dessert, then perhaps you might go with an Easter egg snack tray.

Now these consist of chocolate rabbit cookies as well as light green, pink, and yellow chocolate covered pretzels on an Easter egg dish.

Now these consist of chocolate rabbit cookies as well as light green, pink, and yellow chocolate covered pretzels on an Easter egg dish.

38. For storing your Easter egg cookies, an egg carton certainly comes in handy.

They may not be as intricate as some of the colored egg cookies you see. But they seem to come in a array of designs in so many colors.

They may not be as intricate as some of the colored egg cookies you see. But they seem to come in a array of designs in so many colors.

39. For the fruit lover, you can’t do wrong with this Easter egg pizza.

Now this is more of a dessert pizza with fruit toppings to decorate it over pink icing. Nevertheless, it's quite colorful.

Now this is more of a dessert pizza with fruit toppings to decorate it over pink icing. Nevertheless, it’s quite colorful.

40. Since Christmas has gingerbread houses, it’s only fair we should have cookie houses for Easter.

Now this was probably not made for eating since cookie houses never are. But you have to admire the artistry with the chicks, pretzel windows, and white chocolate pretzel roof.

Now this was probably not made for eating since cookie houses never are. But you have to admire the artistry with the chicks, pretzel windows, and white chocolate pretzel roof.

41. Nothing says Easter like little yellow pretzel chicks.

Who knew that regular pretzels from a grocery store could be just the right shape to make cute little chickies out of them? Then again, they may not be the exact shape, but close.

Who knew that regular pretzels from a grocery store could be just the right shape to make cute little chickies out of them? Then again, they may not be the exact shape, but close.

42. While we’re at it, you can also use pretzels to make pretty flowers with chocolate and M&Ms.

But make sure you use the peanut M&Ms for centers and the regular M&Ms for petals. Nevertheless, quite ingenious.

But make sure you use the peanut M&Ms for centers and the regular M&Ms for petals. Nevertheless, quite ingenious.

43. For Easter appetizers, you can’t go wrong with deviled bunny eggs.

Hey, at least these aren't meant to look like chicks, which was quite disturbing. Also, quite cute.

Hey, at least these aren’t meant to look like chicks, which was quite disturbing. Also, quite cute.

44. If you like bread sticks, it’s only fitting to have them resemble carrots.

You can also add parsley for the leafy ends. But other than their breaded texture, they almost look like the real thing.

You can also add parsley for the leafy ends. But other than their breaded texture, they almost look like the real thing.

45. For your Easter lunch, your kids will certainly love this hatching chick sandwich.

Not surprisingly, this chick is made from a slice of American cheese. And its eggshell is derived from bread.

Not surprisingly, this chick is made from a slice of American cheese. And its eggshell is derived from bread.

46. For those who like brigadeiros, here are some of the Easter egg variety.

Now a brigadeiro is a simple Brazilian chocolate bonbon created in the 1940s. Yet, when you make them as Easter eggs, you can go all out with the decorating.

Now a brigadeiro is a simple Brazilian chocolate bonbon created in the 1940s. Yet, when you make them as Easter eggs, you can go all out with the decorating.

47. If you don’t like Rice Krispies, may I suggest Fruity Pebbles treats would do just as fine for colored eggs.

Of course, you might remember the Fruity Pebbles shamrock treats from my last post for Saint Patrick's Day delectables. Nevertheless, why the Flinstones celebrate Easter and Christmas when it makes no sense, I don't have the slightest idea.

Of course, you might remember the Fruity Pebbles shamrock treats from my last post for Saint Patrick’s Day delectables. Nevertheless, why the Flinstones celebrate Easter and Christmas when it makes no sense, I don’t have the slightest idea.

48. Of course, for Easter you can make your hardboiled deviled eggs an array of different colors.

Of course, you might want to make sure they aren't the Easter eggs you dyed and intend to use for decoration. Because that could upset the kids.

Of course, you might want to make sure they aren’t the Easter eggs you dyed and intend to use for decoration. Because that could upset the kids.

49. For your kid’s lunch, you might want to send them with an Easter Bunny ham and cheese sandwich.

Now the rabbit is made from cheese and sitting on the grass. But if you must have your kid eat this during Lent or Holy Week, make sure you don't put it in their lunch on Fridays.

Now the rabbit is made from cheese and sitting on the grass. But if you must have your kid eat this during Lent or Holy Week, make sure you don’t put it in their lunch on Fridays.

50. This chocolate bunny is carrying an egg in the fast lane.

Now this is professionally made but it's worth showing on this post. Nevertheless, if he goes any faster, the egg might be scrambled.

Now this is professionally made but it’s worth showing on this post. Nevertheless, if he goes any faster, the egg might be scrambled.

51. If you like cookies and jelly beans, then this large Easter egg cookie is for you.

Now I'm no fan of jelly beans and think they taste disgusting (even if they aren't from Bertie Bots). But this seems to have a rather elaborate design thanks to such candies and icing.

Now I’m no fan of jelly beans and think they taste disgusting (even if they aren’t from Bertie Bots). But this seems to have a rather elaborate design thanks to such candies and icing.

52. Now these loveable marshmallow bunnies will hop right into your heart.

Of course, these are actually quite easy to make with marshmallows, icing, and sprinkles. Yet, be careful where you place the eyes.

Of course, these are actually quite easy to make with marshmallows, icing, and sprinkles. Yet, be careful where you place the eyes.

53. Bring flower power to your Easter with these beautiful flower cupcakes.

Like the other flower cupcakes, they're also decorated with icing, marshmallows, and sugar. But they also seem to have a fancier disposition.

Like the other flower cupcakes, they’re also decorated with icing, marshmallows, and sugar. But they also seem to have a fancier disposition.

54. For your dessert centerpiece, you might want to go with an Easter cookie bouquet.

Contains a hatching chick, 5 flowers, and 3 crosses. And all are decorated in each unique way. Some people seem to have too much time on their hands.

Contains a hatching chick, 5 flowers, and 3 crosses. And all are decorated in each unique way. Some people seem to have too much time on their hands.

55. Bring spring into this Easter with an ice cream flower garden patch.

Sure this may look pretty but I think coconut grass and gum drops are disgusting. Also, I wonder what pastry the fencing is made from.

Sure this may look pretty but I think coconut grass and gum drops are disgusting. Also, I wonder what pastry the fencing is made from.

56. If chicks, Easter eggs, or bunnies aren’t your thing, then may I suggest a lamb cake instead.

Now this one is professionally made according to the detail. But the homemade one I found on Google Images was creepier.

Now this one is professionally made according to the detail. But the homemade one I found on Google Images was creepier.

57. When it comes to making Easter egg pastries, some people think bigger is better.

Now this is professionally made and something I wouldn't recommend to anybody. But I put it on my post anyway since it's an Easter treat you can't miss.

Now this is professionally made and something I wouldn’t recommend to anybody. But I put it on my post anyway since it’s an Easter treat you can’t miss.

58. For those with marshmallow peeps, you can’t do wrong with making a peep cake.

Then again, since marshmallow peeps are inedible by design, I think you should just place them in dioramas. Much more entertaining that way.

Then again, since marshmallow peeps are inedible by design, I think you should just place them in dioramas. Much more entertaining that way.

59. Give your fruit kabobs an Easter touch with your marshmallow peeps.

Now it seems to me that the peeps were only added to make these fruit sticks more Easter friendly. Otherwise, I'm not sure if they have any taste beyond sugar.

Now it seems to me that the peeps were only added to make these fruit sticks more Easter friendly. Otherwise, I’m not sure if they have any taste beyond sugar.

60. For your Easter dessert platter, you can’t do wrong with these egg cake pops.

Even better, you can make them all kinds of colors, decorate them, and put them into a bouquet centerpiece.

Even better, you can make them all kinds of colors, decorate them, and put them into a bouquet centerpiece.

61. Why waste money on a chocolate bunny while you can make your own peanut butter fudge bunnies?

However, they seem to be just little chocolate fur balls with rabbit ears and feet. But that's beside the point so use your imagination.

However, they seem to be just little chocolate fur balls with rabbit ears and feet. But that’s beside the point so use your imagination.

62. You can also use your Rice Krispies and melted marshmallows to make Easter baskets for M&Ms.

Sure food coloring may be involved here, but aren't pastel colors for Easter kind of the point? Also, rather have M&Ms than jelly beans.

Sure food coloring may be involved here, but aren’t pastel colors for Easter kind of the point? Also, rather have M&Ms than jelly beans.

63. If you like flower cupcakes but don’t like sugar covered marshmallows, you can always use icing.

Yes, they may look like daisies with the yellow centers. But daisies are much easier flowers to draw than say, roses, which are very complicated.

Yes, they may look like daisies with the yellow centers. But daisies are much easier flowers to draw than say, roses, which are very complicated.

64. For those who like bird’s nests, you might want to use some peeps as the birds.

Now these look cute but I'm not sure if I want to take out the peeps first before eating the nests, especially if the eggs are jelly beans.

Now these look cute but I’m not sure if I want to take out the peeps first before eating the nests, especially if the eggs are jelly beans.

65. For those who want to make an Easter Bunny cake but are more ambitions, you might want to go with this.

Now this might be a tad too realistic in regards to the Easter Bunny, but it's quite cute. Not sure where its cotton tail is though. But like the carrot.

Now this might be a tad too realistic in regards to the Easter Bunny, but it’s quite cute. Not sure where its cotton tail is though. But like the carrot.

66. Chocolate eggs can come in many different sizes and colors as well as are easy to customize.

Sure bunnies and chicks are great Easter motifs. But my favorites of these have to be Mr. and Mrs. Potatohead for obvious reason. Seriously, this person got them right on.

Sure bunnies and chicks are great Easter motifs. But my favorites of these have to be Mr. and Mrs. Potatohead for obvious reason. Seriously, this person got them right on.

67. Of course, I can’t have a post about Easter treats without including eggs made from marshmallow bark.

Okay, I don't know about you but this looks pretty disgusting. I'm not sure why anyone in their right minds would want to eat these.

Okay, I don’t know about you but this looks pretty disgusting. I’m not sure why anyone in their right minds would want to eat these.

68. Nothing says Easter like a carrot cheeseball.

Now just because something looks like a carrot doesn't mean it will taste like one. By the way, the green leafy stuff is parsley.

Now just because something looks like a carrot doesn’t mean it will taste like one. By the way, the green leafy stuff is parsley.

69. You just simply can’t have Easter with some salad stuffed carrots.

And it seems that these carrots are stuffed with egg salad and lettuce as far as I can see. By the way, the carrots seemed to be made from biscuit rolls, possibly from Pillsbury.

And it seems that these carrots are stuffed with egg salad and lettuce as far as I can see. By the way, the carrots seemed to be made from biscuit rolls, possibly from Pillsbury.

70. Of course, nothing says Easter like having jello eggs.

Now my one of my aunts makes jello eggs for Easter. However, they usually come in one color. These seem to have a more elaborate stripes design, since there's not much you can do with jello creative wise.

Now my one of my aunts makes jello eggs for Easter. However, they usually come in one color. These seem to have a more elaborate stripes design, since there’s not much you can do with jello creative wise.

71. Spring in the spirit of Easter with these cute little yellow chick cheese balls.

Of course, since chicks are yellow, feel free to use as much of cheese as you want whether it's cheddar or American. White chicks have mozzarella.

Of course, since chicks are yellow, feel free to use as much of cheese as you want whether it’s cheddar or American. White chicks have mozzarella.

72. Nothing says “Happy Easter” than these lovely yellow chick cupcakes.

Sure they may seem like blobs of icing but are nevertheless adorable. Seriously, you just want to eat one of them up, do you?

Sure they may seem like blobs of icing but are nevertheless adorable. Seriously, you just want to eat one of them up, do you?

73. Of course, if you love chocolate on Easter, prepare to feast your eyes on these Easter egg brownies.

Now I certainly want to take a bite from these lovely brownie eggs. I also love their intricate designs on them as well.

Now I certainly want to take a bite from these lovely brownie eggs. I also love their intricate designs on them as well.

74. For your baby carrots, put them in little pots in this Easter hummus snack.

Of course, I'm not sure where anyone can get flower pots like that so small. Yet, make sure that the hummus doesn't cause a leak if those pots are from a garden store.

Of course, I’m not sure where anyone can get flower pots like that so small. Yet, make sure that the hummus doesn’t cause a leak if those pots are from a garden store.

75. Use your plastic eggs and egg cartons to make an Easter snack tray.

Well, I did have a lot of snackadiums when I did a post on Super Bowl treats. So I suppose this counts. Well, sort of.

Well, I did have a lot of snackadiums when I did a post on Super Bowl treats. So I suppose this counts. Well, sort of.

76. For Easter, your kids will certainly love a little lamb Rice Krispie treat.

Of course, since Rice Krispie treats tend to be sticky to begin with, dipping them in the mini marshmallow pile should be no trouble. Then again, icing helps.

Of course, since Rice Krispie treats tend to be sticky to begin with, dipping them in the mini marshmallow pile should be no trouble. Then again, icing helps.

77. Of course, with marshmallow peeps and Rice Krispies, you can make some sushi for your Easter dessert platter.

Not sure if Rice Krispie peeps sushi is actually sushi. Yet since it's a creative endeavor no matter how inedible and would do well in a peep diorama contest, into this post it goes.

Not sure if Rice Krispie peeps sushi is actually sushi. I mean Rice Krispies aren’t actually rice. Yet since it’s a creative endeavor no matter how inedible and would do well in a peep diorama contest, into this post it goes.

78. Hop into Easter with these loveable Easter Bunny cookies.

Sure their bodies may be chocolate and their legs and faces might be made from sugar. But these are nevertheless adorable.

Sure their bodies may be chocolate and their legs and faces might be made from sugar. But these are nevertheless adorable.

79. For Easter snacks, you can’t do much better than blue bird almond treats.

Now these may not look like real birds or have wings. But they are quite cute even though I have to wonder how their features were painted since almonds are small.

Now these may not look like real birds or have wings. But they are quite cute even though I have to wonder how their features were painted since almonds are small.

80. When it comes to Easter cupcakes, sometimes candy could make a great decorating material.

Now these cupcakes are decorated with Easter candy corn and jelly beans. But though these flowers may be pretty, the toppings may hardly be edible.

Now these cupcakes are decorated with Easter candy corn and jelly beans. But though these flowers may be pretty, the toppings may hardly be edible.

Erin Go Bragh with These Lucky Treats on Saint Patrick’s Day

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Whether you observe it as a regional ethnic and/or religious holiday (in Ireland it’s a solemnity and holy day of obligation) or as an excuse to go all out and drink green Guinness beer at the parades, Saint Patrick’s Day seems to have something for everyone ranging from leprechauns, Irish music, riverdance, the major city parades, pots of gold and rainbows, shamrocks, 4 leaf clovers. Celtic Crosses, and green beer as well as excessive alcohol consumption of beer and whiskey. If you live in Chicago, then the city’s waterways will be green. For those who don’t know anything about Saint Patrick, he was a 5th century Romano-British guy who was kidnapped by pirates and enslaved in Ireland for 6 years. Once he escaped, he decided to become a priest and return there as a missionary to convert the Irish to Christianity and was later consecrated as a bishop. After he died, he was made patron saint of Ireland as well as my dad’s namesake. Now the reason we all wear green on Saint Patrick’s Day because most of Ireland is Roman Catholic and let’s say unless you went to high school with me, you don’t want to wear orange on March 17th because it denotes Protestantism and domination under the British Crown. And if you’re in Northern Ireland on Saint Patrick’s Day, well, you might not want to wear either (but the violence going on there is political, by the way). Oh, and he didn’t drive all the snakes out of Ireland either that’s just a symbolic parable since there were no snakes in Ireland to begin with yet, the shamrock story was probably real, sort of. Pittsburgh is one of the many places that celebrates Saint Patrick’s Day with a parade. And while the Irish can complain all they want to about how the Americans commemorate their patron saint’s day, it’s one of the reasons why Saint Patrick’s Day is such a popular holiday all over the world that it’s even celebrated in Japan (with some celebrations lasting all through March), Malaysia, Germany, Switzerland, France, South Korea, Argentina, and Russia (with celebrations lasting for over a week). Yet, fortunately for them, this one isn’t about Irish drinks though I might do a post on that in the future. Instead, I’ll do a post on all the wonderful treats you can make (or buy) for your Saint Patrick’s Day party whether you be a parent, repressed culinary arts student, or whatever. So to celebrate Irish pride, be wasted, or needing celebrate something between Mardi Gras and Easter, I give you my post on these Lucky Saint Patrick’s Day treats.

1. Top of the morning with this stack of green pancakes.

No surprise if this person used any green maple syrup on these. Yet, the stack seems quite high for a standard serving.

No surprise if this person used any green maple syrup on these. Yet, the stack seems quite high for a standard serving.

2. These jello coins would go perfect with any Irishman’s pot of gold.

Just as long as they're not made from leprechaun urine. But let's not dwell on such disgusting thoughts, please.

Just as long as they’re not made from leprechaun urine. But let’s not dwell on such disgusting thoughts, please.

3. With these cupcakes, you can taste the rainbow.

Yet, unlike skittles, most of these cupcakes will taste like vanilla. But I'm sure that the coins are chocolate, but they probably taste bad.

Yet, unlike skittles, most of these cupcakes will taste like vanilla. But I’m sure that the coins are chocolate, but they probably taste bad.

4. For your Saint Patrick’s Day, hit the jackpot with these rainbow jello cups with whipped cream.

Not sure if they contain alcohol but since Saint Patrick's Day is more for adults, I wouldn't be surprised. Still, you have to like how they stick coins on the top in whipped cream.

Not sure if they contain alcohol but since Saint Patrick’s Day is more for adults, I wouldn’t be surprised. Still, you have to like how they stick coins on the top in whipped cream.

5. Some have a rainbow cake, while others have a rainbow in the cake.

Seriously, I have no idea how this is done. Yet, it does look quite pretty. Not to mention, this cake has green icing.

Seriously, I have no idea how this is done. Yet, it does look quite pretty. Not to mention, this cake has green icing.

6. If you don’t want to use food coloring for your rainbow, I’m sure fruit would do just fine.

Toppings on these cupcakes include strawberries, cantaloupe, pineapple, kiwi, blueberries, grapes, and marshmallows. Yet, for a second, I thought this was some sort of rainbow sushi configuration.

Toppings on these cupcakes include strawberries, cantaloupe, pineapple, kiwi, blueberries, grapes, and marshmallows. Yet, for a second, I thought this was some sort of rainbow sushi configuration.

7. Make your Saint Patrick’s Day party wonderful with these lovely shamrock cookies.

Now these shamrocks seem like they can be from a Dr. Seuss storybook. Nevertheless, more intricate than I can master.

Now these shamrocks seem like they can be from a Dr. Seuss storybook. Nevertheless, more intricate than I can master.

8. While red velvet is great for Valentine’s Day, Saint Patrick’s Day has green velvet cupcakes, too.

Now these cupcakes are quite green. Wonder if I can get the recipe to make some for my high school or college reunion, if my graduating classes have them.

Now these cupcakes are quite green. Wonder if I can get the recipe to make some for my high school or college reunion, if my graduating classes have them.

9. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with these cupcakes of green beer pints.

I'm not sure if you want to give these to children. It might give them the wrong idea. Yet I love the icing effects on the frothing top.

I’m not sure if you want to give these to children. It might give them the wrong idea. Yet I love the icing effects on the frothing top.

10. For this Saint Patrick’s Day, put a little leprechaun in your child’s lunch this year.

I'm not sure you can retain the shape in a plastic bag, but I have to admire the artistry here. I especially like the marshmallow and chocolate eyes as well as the carrot beard.

I’m not sure you can retain the shape in a plastic bag, but I have to admire the artistry here. I especially like the marshmallow and chocolate eyes as well as the carrot beard.

11. These rainbow cupcakes are the exact thing your Saint Patrick’s Day party needs.

I'm not sure if the rainbows are edible but the cloud icing sure is fluffy.

I’m not sure if the rainbows are edible but the cloud icing sure is fluffy. May not lead you to your pot of gold but the kiddies will love these.

12. Bring in the Saint Patrick’s Day freshness with these mint shamrock Oreos.

Nice they have the mint filling with a carved shamrock on top to bring in the Saint Patrick's Day spirit. Yet, I wonder if these are bought or made.

Nice they have the mint filling with a carved shamrock on top to bring in the Saint Patrick’s Day spirit. Yet, I wonder if these are bought or made.

13. For your Saint Patrick’s Day snack why don’t you try these shamrock nachos with a pot of cheese gold dip?

Of course, this would've been a perfect snack for my father. Unfortunately, he had to go on a low sodium diet. Yet, the chips might work but the cheese is totally Velveeta.

Of course, this would’ve been a perfect snack for my father. Unfortunately, he had to go on a low sodium diet. Yet, the chips might work but the cheese is totally Velveeta.

14. Make Saint Patrick’s Day special for your kids with these lovely little leprechaun hats.

Now these seem to include marshmallows, thin mints, chocolate, and icing. Your children will go as hyper as henshit over these.

Now these seem to include marshmallows, thin mints, chocolate, and icing. Your children will go as hyper as henshit over these.

15. You might not get your pot of gold. Yet, you can always have your pot of gold chocolate cake.

Nevertheless, I wonder what the shamrock and coins are made of. Probably not something that's worth anything. Yet, the pot is pure chocolate and that's all what matters.

Nevertheless, I wonder what the shamrock and coins are made of. Probably not something that’s worth anything. Yet, the pot is pure chocolate and that’s all what matters.

16. Instead of tricking a leprechaun to find a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, you can make your own.

Now these include: sour rainbow Airheads, marshmallows, chocolate, filling, and golden sprinkles. Of course, you might want to carry one with both hands.

Now these include: sour rainbow Airheads, marshmallows, chocolate, filling, and golden sprinkles. Of course, you might want to carry one with both hands.

17. These cupcakes come in two flavors: vanilla and green.

Now these cupcakes would be great for children since they contain leprechauns, four leaf clovers, pots of gold, and rainbows.

Now these cupcakes would be great for children since they contain leprechauns, four leaf clovers, pots of gold, and rainbows.

18. For a great Saint Patrick’s Day centerpiece, you can’t do wrong with this leprechaun hat cake.

Of course, this hat might be too big for an actual leprechaun. Yet, I love the shamrocks on this green hat.

Of course, this hat might be too big for an actual leprechaun. Yet, I love the shamrocks on this green hat.

19. For appetizers, these small shamrock pizzas will bring you luck, sort of.

I'm not sure if a 3 shamrock pepper pizza may or may not be lucky. Yet, I think these are quite cute.

I’m not sure if a 3 shamrock pepper pizza may or may not be lucky. Yet, I think these are quite adorable.

20. Of course, nothing could make an Irish man jig than a cheese pizza with shamrock leaves.

I'm not sure what those leaves are. Must be some kind of herb that consists of a single leaf meant to resemble a 3 leaf clover.

I’m not sure what those leaves are. Must be some kind of herb that consists of a single leaf meant to resemble a 3 leaf clover.

21. This Saint Patrick’s Day, treat your guests to these cream cheese shamrock brownies.

It's ingenious on how the shamrocks are sort of green. Yet, I love the chocolate brownie part of them more.

It’s ingenious on how the shamrocks are sort of green. Yet, I love the chocolate brownie part of them more.

22. Wake up on this Saint Patrick’s Day with these rainbow waffles.

Of course, the whipped cream on the waffles doubles for clouds.  Yet, I'm sure your kids will love this.

Of course, the whipped cream on the waffles doubles for clouds. Yet, I’m sure your kids will love this.

23. For a little Mexican flavor in your Saint Patrick’s Day, here is your shamrock taco.

Courtesy of Bernardo O'Higgins with the 4 leaf clover pepper to boot. Yet, I bet this is the kind of food Pope Francis eats on Saint Patrick's Day if he ever celebrates it for Argentina has a large Irish population.

Courtesy of Bernardo O’Higgins with the 4 leaf clover pepper to boot. Yet, I bet this is the kind of food Pope Francis eats on Saint Patrick’s Day if he ever celebrates it for Argentina has a large Irish population.

24. Nothing says Saint Patrick’s Day like a  shamrock cake with gold coins on it.

Of course, this would be more in the spirit of Saint Patrick's Day if it included a leprechaun, rainbow, and pot of gold but I don't think the baker had the budget.

Of course, this would be more in the spirit of Saint Patrick’s Day if it included a leprechaun, rainbow, and pot of gold but I don’t think the baker had the budget.

25. For your Saint Patrick’s Day lunch, you can use peppers as shamrocks.

And I see that this person is twice as lucky since they have 2 4 leaf clovers on their plate. Also, they have some creamy dressing to dip them in.

And I see that this person is twice as lucky since they have 2 4 leaf clovers on their plate. Also, they have some creamy dressing to dip them in.

26. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with this lovely pot of gold pizza.

Of course, since peppers only come in red, green, and yellow, the rainbow doesn't have a lot of color variation. Yet, this pizza is quite inventive and I do like the shamrocks.

Of course, since peppers only come in red, green, and yellow, the rainbow doesn’t have a lot of color variation. Yet, this pizza is quite inventive and I do like the shamrocks.

27. Wish your guests luck on Saint Patrick’s Day with this shamrock bread.

Yet, how they got the shamrock in the bread, I'll never know. Seriously, how in the hell did they do that?

Yet, how they got the shamrock in the bread, I’ll never know. Seriously, how in the hell did they do that?

28. Now you have rainbow cupcakes, yet these have the rainbow in the cupcakes.

Of course, while the bottom is in green velvet, the top rainbow part is covered in chocolate to conceal the surprise.

Of course, while the bottom is in green velvet, the top rainbow part is covered in chocolate to conceal the surprise.

29. Now these green velvet cupcakes with the rainbow icing and gold coins seem good enough to eat.

And upon looking at these, I thought the icing consisted of rainbow candy canes. Yet, the coins sure seem edible but I could be wrong.

And upon looking at these, I thought the icing consisted of rainbow candy canes. Yet, the coins sure seem edible but I could be wrong.

30. Since Ireland is a big potato country, then it’s only appropriate to celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with some green mashed potatoes.

Now I love potatoes just as much as the next Irish girl, but still, these are quite disgusting. Seriously, green mashed potatoes?

Now I love potatoes just as much as the next Irish girl, but still, these are quite disgusting. Seriously, green mashed potatoes?

31. Get in the Saint Patrick’s Day spirit with treating your guests to an all in one green dinner.

Now I know this is just a normal dinner with chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, and a bun. Yet, add green food color and it seems quite sickening.

Now I know this is just a normal dinner with chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, and a bun. Yet, add green food color and it seems quite sickening.

32. Treat your kids this Saint Patrick’s Day with this green macaroni and cheese.

Compared to the mashed potatoes and the dinner, it may not be as healthy but it's sure way less disgusting.

Compared to the mashed potatoes and the dinner, it may not be as healthy but it’s sure way less disgusting.

33. For your guests at your Saint Patrick’s Day party, you can’t go wrong with these shamrock buns.

Of course, those shamrocks are probably herbs since real clover may not be tasty to humans and more delectable to cows.

Of course, those shamrocks are probably herbs since real clover may not be tasty to humans and more delectable to cows.

34. Nothing brings out the spirit of Saint Patrick’s Day than this shamrock pizza.

If it weren't for the red pepper bits, I could've sworn it was the same cheese pizza from 15 only baked. Also, those aren't real clovers.

If it weren’t for the red pepper bits, I could’ve sworn it was the same cheese pizza from 15 only baked. Also, those aren’t real clovers.

35. Include your dog in the Saint Patrick’s Day festivities with these shamrock dog treats.

Now I'm not sure what to think about the icing. Yet, these would be totally appropriate for an Irish wolfhound or an Irish setter since they are breeds from the Emerald Isle.

Now I’m not sure what to think about the icing. Yet, these would be totally appropriate for an Irish wolfhound or an Irish setter since they are breeds from the Emerald Isle.

36. For appetizers, nothing will satisfy your Saint Patrick’s Day party guests more than green ravioli.

The green coloring agent here is probably pesto but I can't be exactly sure on these things.

The green coloring agent here is probably pesto but I can’t be exactly sure on these things. However, I can’t comment on the filling.

37. Make your Saint Patrick’s Day special with an English muffin shamrock pizza.

Of course, I could tell it's an English muffin since it's small and the bottom seems powdered not smooth. Then again, it could be a bagel but I'm not sure.

Of course, I could tell it’s an English muffin since it’s small and the bottom seems powdered not smooth. Then again, it could be a bagel but I’m not sure.

38. Capture the rainbow for your Saint Patrick’s Day party with this rainbow vegetable tray.

So 3 peppers stand in for red, yellow, and green. Carrots are orange, purple cauliflower is purple, and blue is represented by blue nacho chips, which I assume is the only reason why they have anything to do here.

So 3 peppers stand in for red, yellow, and green. Carrots are orange, purple cauliflower is purple, and blue is represented by blue nacho chips, which I assume is the only reason why they have anything to do here.

39. Celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with these shamrocks made from Fruity Pebbles.

Basically Fruity Pebbles is a cereal with spokesmen who celebrate holidays before they're supposed to exist. Let's agree that The Flintstones take place in some kind of alternative universe of some sort.

Basically Fruity Pebbles is a cereal with spokesmen who celebrate holidays before they’re supposed to exist. Let’s agree that The Flintstones take place in some kind of alternative universe of some sort.

40. Eat like an Irishman this Saint Patrick’s Day with this shamrock corned beef and cabbage salad.

Okay, this looks disgusting. Also, I tried corned beef once, too salty. Seriously, that shamrock looks like brains.

Okay, this looks disgusting. Also, I tried corned beef once, too salty. Seriously, that shamrock looks like brains.

41. Send your kid off to school with this one of a kind Saint Patrick’s Day lunch.

Now this includes some 4 leaf clover jello and a sandwich with a cheese and pepper 4 leaf shamrock design. Also has "LUCKY" spelled out in bread.

Now this includes some 4 leaf clover jello and a sandwich with a cheese and pepper 4 leaf shamrock design. Also has “LUCKY” spelled out in bread.

42. Nothing makes Saint Patrick’s Day better than these leprechaun related cake pops.

Now these consist of hats and pots of gold on sticks. I'll be lucky if some of them have chocolate in them.

Now these consist of hats and pots of gold on sticks. I’ll be lucky if some of them have chocolate in them.

43. Rock out on your Saint Patrick’s Day party with these shamrock guitar cookies.

Those who have such cookies probably have a collection of Irish music consisting of Van Morrison, Dropkick Murphys, and U2.

Those who have such cookies probably have a collection of Irish music consisting of Van Morrison, Dropkick Murphys, and U2.

44. For you Irish parents out there, I’m sure your kids will love these shamrock sandwiches in their lunches.

One consists of a parsley and cheese Irish flag while the other is of a cucumber 4 leaf clover.

One consists of a parsley and cheese Irish flag while the other is of a cucumber 4 leaf clover. Yet, I’m not sure whether they’re the filling or the top.

45. For you adults out there (and I mean adults), celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with these Irish inspired jello shots.

On second thought, these would be great for my high school reunion, if it ever comes or if I ever feel like going to it.

On second thought, these would be great for my high school reunion, if it ever comes or if I ever feel like going to it.

46. Have the Irish luck on your backs this Saint Patrick’s Day morning with a 4 leaf clover pancake.

I'm not sure what to think about having syrup on that. Really makes the pancake change color for some reason.

I’m not sure what to think about having syrup on that. Really makes the pancake change color for some reason.

47. I wouldn’t say it’d be wise to leave out these green owl cookies during your Saint Patrick’s Day party.

I'm not sure what significance owls have on Saint Patrick's Day yet, these are quite cute. Seriously, they're adorable and I don't care.

I’m not sure what significance owls have on Saint Patrick’s Day yet, these are quite cute. Seriously, they’re adorable and I don’t care.

48. For your Saint Patrick’s Day snack you can’t go wrong with shamrock pretzels.

Now this includes pretzels you can get in any bag at the grocery store, white chocolate, green icing, and green sugar. Basically the easiest treats for this post.

Now this includes pretzels you can get in any bag at the grocery store, white chocolate, green icing, and green sugar. Basically the easiest treats for this post.

49. Make your guests lucky this Saint Patrick’s Day with these Rainbow and pot of gold cookies.

One thing about these cookies which makes my head scratch is how in the hell can you buy golden sprinkles? Seriously, I've never seen those in any store I've been to (or maybe I wasn't paying any attention).

One thing about these cookies which makes my head scratch is how in the hell can you buy golden sprinkles? Seriously, I’ve never seen those in any store I’ve been to (or maybe I wasn’t paying any attention).

50. Treat your neighborhood Irish cop this Saint Patrick’s Day with these rainbow donuts.

Of course, some people might associate rainbow donuts with some other event, especially in San Francisco if you get my drift. Yet, these are pretty.

Of course, some people might associate rainbow donuts with some other event, especially in San Francisco if you get my drift. Yet, these are pretty.

51. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with this loaf of rainbow bread.

All you need to add is flour, yeast, water, and hallucinogenic brown acid from Woodstock (just kidding about the last part, but I couldn't resist for the caption).

All you need to add is flour, yeast, water, and hallucinogenic brown acid from Woodstock (just kidding about the last part, but I couldn’t resist for the caption).

52. Treat your Saint Patrick’s Day party guests with these lovely rainbow cookies.

Now I wonder how they brought out the colors in these beautiful cookies. Yet I know they broke them in half once out of the oven.

Now I wonder how they brought out the colors in these beautiful cookies. Yet I know they broke them in half once out of the oven.

53. Nothing makes a better dessert on Saint Patrick’s Day than rainbow pudding.

Of course, I wonder how these colors manage to not mix together. Still, pretty creative and I love the purple.

Of course, I wonder how these colors manage to not mix together. Still, pretty creative and I love the purple.

54. For your Saint Patrick’s Day party, treat your guests to these rainbow shish kabobs.

Now I'm sure most of the veggies are of their natural color save the one that's supposed to represent blue. I mean how many blue vegetables can you name?

Now I’m sure most of the veggies are of their natural color save the one that’s supposed to represent blue. I mean how many blue vegetables can you name?

55. Nothing makes a Saint Patrick’s Day party than a cake with a leprechaun, rainbow, and a pot of gold.

Of course, this cake needs 2 dishes since the pot of gold was made separately and is so big. Also, I don't know what to make of that leprechaun.

Of course, this cake needs 2 dishes since the pot of gold was made separately and is so big. Also, I don’t know what to make of that leprechaun.

56. Accommodate your top of the morning needs with a green bagel or 2.

Now green dinners are one thing, but I'm not sure of what to make out with green bagels. Seriously, this green craze is getting a bit out of hand.

Now green dinners are one thing, but I’m not sure of what to make out with green bagels. Seriously, this green craze is getting a bit out of hand.

57. Celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with this 4 leaf clover shamrock pizza.

Of course, pesto might've been great to use as sauce because I don't think these peppers bring the green out enough.

Of course, pesto might’ve been great to use as sauce because I don’t think these peppers bring the green out enough.

58. For appetizers, you can’t go wrong with green deviled eggs during your Saint Paddy’s celebration.

Of course, if you serve them with green ham, then you might as well have a Dr. Seuss celebration.

Of course, if you serve them with green ham, then you might as well have a Dr. Seuss celebration. Yet, make sure the green ham doesn’t contain trichinosis.

59. Have a healthy Saint Patrick’s Day party with this rainbow and pot of gold fruit and candy tray.

Now this rainbow consists of strawberries, orange slices, pineapple, white and purple grapes, and blueberries. Also has marshmallow and caramel candies in the gold wrapper.

Now this rainbow consists of strawberries, orange slices, pineapple, white and purple grapes, and blueberries. Also has marshmallow and caramel candies in the gold wrapper.

60. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with a dinner of shamrock chicken pot pie.

Now this may be traditional Irish fare, but this pie must be small because it seems like it was made for one person. Note the fork.

Now this may be traditional Irish fare, but this pie must be small because it seems like it was made for one person. Note the fork.

61. For your Saint Patrick’s Day snack, you can’t do wrong with these shamrock cheese toasts.

You have to like how they use these green peppers as shamrocks and how they got cheese to resemble gold.

You have to like how they use these green peppers as shamrocks and how they got cheese to resemble gold.

62. You’ve seen the shamrock cake. Now this one puts the shamrock in the cake.

Of course, the shamrock is green velvet while the rest of it is vanilla in 7 layers. Once again, I don't know anything about such process to get this.

Of course, the shamrock is green velvet while the rest of it is vanilla in 7 layers. Once again, I don’t know anything about such process to get this.

63. Treat your little leprechauns to these leprechaun ice cream cones.

Now I'm sure these had to spend some time in the freezer, knowing how ice cream melts. Yet, they may not help you find a pot of gold but they sure are cute.

Now I’m sure these had to spend some time in the freezer, knowing how ice cream melts. Yet, they may not help you find a pot of gold but they sure are cute.

64. Nothing says Saint Patrick’s Day like a shamrock made from Rice Krispies.

Of course, nobody should ever underestimate the creative potential of marshmallows, Rice Krispies, and food coloring. I mean I've basically had Rice Krispie stuff on almost every treat post.

Of course, nobody should ever underestimate the creative potential of marshmallows, Rice Krispies, and food coloring. I mean I’ve basically had Rice Krispie stuff on almost every treat post.

65. Of course, you can always make Saint Patrick’s Day treats with Lucky Charms cereal.

Of course, you can also have them with a side of green milk, too. Yet, you might not want to tell Lucky the Leprechaun about this though.

Of course, you can also have them with a side of green milk, too. Yet, you might not want to tell Lucky the Leprechaun about this though.

66. Treat your Saint Patrick’s Day guests with these cannoles (or eclairs) with green filling.

The picture says these are eclairs but they look like cannoles to me. for some reason. Yet, I love the icing shamrocks on them.

The picture says these are eclairs but they look like cannoles to me. for some reason. Yet, I love the icing shamrocks on them.

67. Now these cookies emphasize what Saint Patrick’s Day is all about: leprechauns, pots of gold, Ireland, and beer.

Eh, I'm not sure if you'd want beer on a Saint Patrick's Day cookie, especially if your party has kids around. Just saying.

Eh, I’m not sure if you’d want beer on a Saint Patrick’s Day cookie, especially if your party has kids around. Just saying.

68. Of course, you can’t have a Saint Patrick’s Day party without shamrock and Guinness cake pops.

Now I've had cake pops on a lot treat posts, yet I'm not sure if a Guinness pint one is a good idea. Seriously, it's beer.

Now I’ve had cake pops on a lot treat posts, yet I’m not sure if a Guinness pint one is a good idea. Seriously, it’s beer.

69. These Rice Krispie shamrocks wish you a happy Saint Patrick’s Day.

Of course, these seem quite happy for some reason. However, I'm not sure about putting faces on shamrocks yet I guarantee your kids will love them.

Of course, these seem quite happy for some reason. However, I’m not sure about putting faces on shamrocks yet I guarantee your kids will love them.

70. Wish your Saint Patrick’s Day guests good luck with these fortune cookies.

Of course, these cookies were probably the brain child of some Toshiro O'Flaherty. Yet, I've featured such cookies in treat posts before.

Of course, these cookies were probably the brain child of some Toshiro O’Flaherty. Yet, I’ve featured such cookies in treat posts before.

71. For the technicolor sensation, try some rainbow cake this Saint Patrick’s Day.

Of course, this comes in 6 different layers and is covered in rainbow M&Ms, apparently. Yet, it looks quite good.

Of course, this comes in 6 different layers and is covered in rainbow M&Ms, apparently. Yet, it looks quite good.

72. Engage in the Irish spirit with these shamrock cookies.

Seems like someone really loves decorating shamrocks for some reason. Yet, I wonder how he or she pulls of the plaid.

Seems like someone really loves decorating shamrocks for some reason. Yet, I wonder how he or she pulls of the plaid.

73. I’m sure your little leprechauns will delight in these hat cookies.

Of course, they consist of 2 chocolate covered cookies from the store, peanut butter to hold them together, and gum drops to decorate. Of course, I'd just take off the gumdrop before eating.

Of course, they consist of 2 chocolate covered cookies from the store, peanut butter to hold them together, and gum drops to decorate. Of course, I’d just take off the gumdrop before eating.

74. For Saint Patrick’s Day, you can’t go wrong with these shamrock snacks.

 Now these consists of pretzels, icing, green syrup, and green M&Ms. Nevertheless, these are adorable.

Now these consists of pretzels, icing, green syrup, and green M&Ms. Nevertheless, these are adorable.

75. Give your guests luck on Saint Patrick’s Day with these shamrock chocolates.

And what better way to have them than green on a stick? Well, they may not all be green yet the come in so many varieties.

And what better way to have them than green on a stick? Well, they may not all be green yet the come in so many varieties.

76. Bring some luck to your Saint Patrick’s Day morning with this 4 leaf shamrock spinach bake.

Of course, if you didn't see the orange slices, many wouldn't think it was a breakfast food. Yet, I wonder how they manage to pull this off.

Of course, if you didn’t see the orange slices, many wouldn’t think it was a breakfast food. Yet, I wonder how they manage to pull this off.

77. For the kids on Saint Patrick’s Day, what better snacks for them to make than rainbows on a stick?

All you need are Fruit Loops, marshmallows, and skewers. Yet, I'm not sure how you get the arch most rainbows have.

All you need are Fruit Loops, marshmallows, and skewers. Yet, I’m not sure how you get the arch most rainbows have.

78. Nothing brings the spirit of Saint Patrick’s Day than some rainbow toast.

Of course, these manage to have their color mostly because they're all covered in sugar. Nevertheless, they are quite pretty.

Of course, these manage to have their color mostly because they’re all covered in sugar. Nevertheless, they are quite pretty.

79. Find your pot of gold with these leprechaun cupcakes.

Sadly, these leprechauns won't help you find their pot of gold. Yet, they're quite adorable and your kids will certainly love them.

Sadly, these leprechauns won’t help you find their pot of gold. Yet, they’re quite adorable and your kids will certainly love them.

80. With shamrock cupcakes like these, your Saint Patrick’s Day is as good as gold.

Now you have to admire how they used little Debbie cakes to bring out the Blarney Stone. Yet, these sure look tasty, especially since they're chocolate.

Now you have to admire how they used little Debbie cakes to bring out the Blarney Stone. Yet, these sure look tasty, especially since they’re chocolate.

The Wonderful World of Vintage Valentines (Second Edition)

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Since I posted my last vintage Valentines post last year in January, it’s become one of my most popular blog posts ever with 1,517 views and over 40 shares on Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr. I especially get a lot of views for this post around Valentine’s Day for obvious reasons. Well, for those who loved my last bunch of vintage Valentines, there’s a lot more where that came from. Whether they be racist, sexist, offensive, or somewhat carry unfortunate implications. Many of these vintage greeting cards may make you wonder why people would send these to each other or even their sweethearts. Sometimes they make you wish you can send them to your classmates while in elementary school. Some might have seen as a good idea at the time to the designer but seem to carry unfortunate implications by today’s standards. So without further adieu, here are some more of the wonderful vintage Valentines from yesterday.

1. Nothing says Valentine’s Day like a fly telling you to stick around or catch on.

Or from the fly's perspective, "Fly on this tape you'll be stuck on forever and die."

Or from the fly’s perspective, “Fly on this tape you’ll be stuck on forever and die.” How romantic!

2. Of course, there’s nothing more romantic place on Valentine’s Day than a butcher shop.

Now I'm not sure if I'm creeped out by the dead chickens or the the boy with a cleaver. And I'm not sure if "I'd like to meat you, valentine," is a cute message or a way to tell them you're a cannibal.

Now I’m not sure if I’m creeped out by the dead chickens or the the boy with a cleaver. And I’m not sure if “I’d like to meat you, valentine,” is a cute message or a way to tell them you’re a cannibal.

3. Say that you’ll never be false to your valentine by sending them a card with a set of dentures.

Sure you want to assure your sweetheart you'll never be false to them. But is a card with false teeth on it a good idea? Seriously, that's disgusting.

Sure you want to assure your sweetheart you’ll never be false to them. But is a card with false teeth on it a good idea? Seriously, that’s disgusting.

4. For Valentine’s Day assure that your heart only pants for only them by sending them a valentine with bloomers.

Now I think this might be a British valentine, because over there, "pants" means underwear. And bloomers were used as ladies underwear back in the later Victorian era, which is like sending a valentine with panties on it today. Seriously, what was the designer thinking?

Now I think this might be a British valentine, because over there, “pants” means underwear. And bloomers were used as ladies underwear back in the later Victorian era, which is like sending a valentine with panties on it today. Seriously, what was the designer thinking?

5. Nothing says Valentine’s Day like a cat telling you that she’ll be your sweetie pie if you make the dough.

Of course, this one seems quite sexist by our standards. Yet, remember that lady cat housewives are also known to make strawberry tarts which may have 6 rats in it. So she has her work cut out for her.

Of course, this one seems quite sexist by our standards. Yet, remember that lady cat housewives are also known to make strawberry tarts which may have 6 rats in it. So she has her work cut out for her.

6. Of course, there’s nothing like a valentine from a sweetheart saying that he’s not being exclusive.

Now if I received a card like this from my boyfriend, I'd be furious and move on to the next guy. Seriously, this guy goes with blondes on Monday and Friday, a showgirl on Tuesday, a maid on Wednesday, and a schoolgirl on Thursday. Dump this man who sent this to you.

Now if I received a card like this from my boyfriend, I’d be furious and move on to the next guy. Seriously, this guy goes with blondes on Monday and Friday, a showgirl on Tuesday, a maid on Wednesday, and a schoolgirl on Thursday. Dump this man who sent this to you.

7. Nothing says Valentine’s Day like a card depicting an adorable rendering of every parents’ worst nightmare.

Seriously, this is a child for God's sake! And he has a gun! Seriously, small children and guns should at least stay the hell away from each other! Such image is a tragedy waiting to happen. If your valentine has children (whether yours or not), avoid such imagery like the plague.

Seriously, this is a child for God’s sake! And he has a gun! Seriously, small children and guns should at least stay the hell away from each other! Such image is a tragedy waiting to happen. If your valentine has children (whether yours or not), avoid such imagery like the plague.

8. Of course, you can’t say “I love you” without saying how you’d go for them in a big way.

Of course, I'm not sure if I'd want a guy saying he's in the market for a valentine and wants to go for me in a big weigh while he's seen with a cleaver and a dead chicken on the scales. Seriously, the butcher metaphors are better suited for Halloween.

Of course, I’m not sure if I’d want a guy saying he’s in the market for a valentine and wants to go for me in a big weigh while he’s seen with a cleaver and a dead chicken on the scales. Seriously, the butcher metaphors are better suited for Halloween.

9. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than having a boy seize a girl’s eyes and mouth from behind.

This could turn into an emergency situation very quickly if the kid isn't careful enough.

This could turn into an emergency situation very quickly if the kid isn’t careful enough.

10. Happy Valentine’s Day from Popeye the Sailor Man.

Okay, that's a terrible rendition of Popeye and apparently someone at Hallmark really didn't know how to draw. Either that, or King Features Syndicate threatened to sue for copyright infringement for good reason.

Okay, that’s a terrible rendition of Popeye and apparently someone at Hallmark really didn’t know how to draw. Either that, or King Features Syndicate threatened to sue for copyright infringement for good reason. Also the girl is totally not Olive Oyl by any means.

11. Nothing says you need to thaw out like a Valentine depicting a girl in the refrigerator.

Of course, this has a tendency for this girl to be frozen like Han Solo. Still, it would've been more appropriate with a freezer and much more disturbing, too.

Of course, this has a tendency for this girl to be frozen like Han Solo. Still, it would’ve been more appropriate with a freezer and much more disturbing, too.

12. When searching for a girlfriend, it’s best that you go dressed in a matching checkered deer stalker cap and tweed with orange as well as a deer hunting rifle. Seriously, for some men, finding a girlfriend is like deer hunting.

Apparently, this card's designer hasn't read "The Most Dangerous Game." It's about a guy being stranded on an island inhabited by a wealthy Russian madman who likes to hunt humans for fun and exactly what this valentine reminds me of.

Apparently, this card’s designer hasn’t read “The Most Dangerous Game.” It’s about a guy being stranded on an island inhabited by a wealthy Russian madman who likes to hunt humans for fun and exactly what this valentine reminds me of.

13. Of course, what better valentine to send your sweetheart than one depicting kids on the playground.

Is it just me or does this valentine's message seem apparently dirty? I don't know but I have a feeling, "mount" doesn't really mean going on the playground horsey on this valentine.

Is it just me or does this valentine’s message seem apparently dirty? I don’t know but I have a feeling, “mount” doesn’t really mean going on the playground horsey on this valentine.

14. Of course, nothing can be more adorable on Valentine’s Day than a cute angel building a snowman.

What I don't get about this is why this little cherub has a winter hat and scarf and not much else, but a diaper. Seriously, if your hat and neck feel cold, so does the rest of you.

What I don’t get about this is why this little cherub has a winter hat and scarf and not much else, but a diaper. Seriously, if your hat and neck feel cold, so does the rest of you.

15. Happy Valentine’s Day by some person of indeterminate gender and his or her cat/dog hybrid pet in the dog house.

Now what I don't understand is the message, "Sweetheart dear, I'm in a trance, so wipe your pen upon my-" oh, now I get it. This was meant for a guy, wasn't it? It's even dirtier if you or your valentine's British since "pants" means what you wear under your trousers.

Now what I don’t understand is the message, “Sweetheart dear, I’m in a trance, so wipe your pen upon my-” oh, now I get it. This was meant for a guy, wasn’t it? It’s even dirtier if you or your valentine’s British since “pants” means what you wear under your trousers.

16. Happy Valentine’s Day from flapper fish but don’t ask me how she uses her fins.

Seriously, how is she able to smoke? I mean fish can't breathe outside water and fire can't survive in water. So how's that possible? Then again, they manage to light fires underwater on Spongebob Squarepants so don't ask me.

Seriously, how is she able to smoke? I mean fish can’t breathe outside water and fire can’t survive in water. So how’s that possible? Then again, they manage to light fires underwater on Spongebob Squarepants so don’t ask me.

17. There’s no better occasion than Valentine’s Day to tell your loved one how much you hate Asian people and that you can’t keep it in your pants.

Talk about offensive Asian and demeaning naval stereotypes. Seems like Asian sailors get the worst. Still, if you send this to your Asian girlfriend, then expect her to take you down with her karate chopping fists of fury. Oh, shit, now I'm being stereotypical. Still, such valentines will make Asian ladies dump their boyfriends in the most furious way possible.

Talk about offensive Asian and demeaning naval stereotypes. Seems like Asian sailors get the worst since this screams racism. Still, if you send this to your Asian girlfriend, then expect her to take you down with her karate chopping fists of fury. Oh, shit, now I’m being stereotypical. Still, such valentines will make Asian ladies dump their boyfriends in the most furious way possible.

18. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than offensively mocking Native Americans with demeaning stereotypes.

Now this is the kind of valentine I think Washington Redskins owner Dan Snyder would send to his Native American critics who want him to change the team's name like most Americans do. Seriously, Redskins, please change your name. It's offensive.

Now this is the kind of valentine I think Washington Redskins owner Dan Snyder would send to his Native American critics who want him to change the team’s name like most Americans do. Seriously, Redskins, please change your name. It’s offensive like this Valentine of these kids thinking that Indians practice human sacrifice.

19. A valentine depicting a beaver carving a heart. Don’t see what can go wrong with that?

Of course, anyone who's over a certain age knows what "beaver" also pertain to. It's even dirtier if you imagine that both sender and recipient are lesbians. This is pushing it to vulgar territory if you ask me.

Of course, anyone who’s over a certain age knows what “beaver” also pertain to. It’s even dirtier if you imagine that both sender and recipient are lesbians. This is pushing it to vulgar territory if you ask me.

20. Of course, there’s nothing like some hotdogs on the fire during Valentine’s Day.

Hmm, seems like this one is having his or her own sausage grilling itself for a change. Never mind the evil maniacal look on that hotdog's face.

Hmm, seems like this one is having his or her own sausage grilling itself for a change. Never mind the evil maniacal look on that hotdog’s face.

21. Nothing makes a more romantic valentine than one of a pirate threatening to kidnap you.

Okay, the pirate is all right. But the message makes the sender seem like a complete psycho. Seriously, I wonder how many received this valentine and called the cops over it.

Okay, the pirate is all right. But the message makes the sender seem like a complete psycho. Seriously, I wonder how many received this valentine and called the cops over it. Seriously, abduction for love is a thing and it’s not pretty.

22. Be my valentine or this means war.

Now the little kid with the battle gear is fine. Yet, the message basically elicits an offer they can't refuse or a possible violent threat, which isn't okay in the least. What's wrong with, "I'll be your knight in shining armor, valentine?" Whoever thought the message was cute ought to have their head examined.

Now the little kid with the battle gear is fine. Yet, the message basically elicits an offer they can’t refuse or a possible violent threat, which isn’t okay in the least. What’s wrong with, “I’ll be your knight in shining armor, valentine?” Whoever thought the message was cute ought to have their head examined.

23. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than a valentine of a lonely dog about to shoot himself.

Seriously, whose fucked up idea was this? "Be my valentine or I'm going to shoot myself?" If you receive this, you might want to call the Suicidal Hotline for the sender.

Seriously, whose fucked up idea was this? “Be my valentine or I’m going to shoot myself?” If you receive this, you might want to call the Suicidal Hotline for the sender.

24. Be my valentine or I’ll murder you, burn your body, and put your ashes in the trash can.

It's not what's in the trash can, it's who. Of course, this explains why so many local girls have mysteriously vanished recently if the trash can gives you a clue.

It’s not what’s in the trash can, it’s who. Of course, this explains why so many local girls have mysteriously vanished recently if the trash can of ashes gives you a clue.

25. Happy Valentine’s Day from Ronald McDonald.

Is it just me or does Ronald McDonald seem a bit creepy to you? I mean he's always quite creepy being a clown, but here he seems like he's about to haunt you in your dreams.

Is it just me or does Ronald McDonald seem a bit creepy to you? I mean he’s always quite creepy being a clown, but here he seems like he’s about to haunt your dreams. Hope you love therapy.

26. Give me a kiss and I won’t bite your head off.

Of course, this doesn't help that the wolf looks as if it's ready for a meal with its tongue hanging out. It's pretty terrifying if you ask me.

Of course, this doesn’t help that the wolf looks as if it’s ready for a meal with its tongue hanging out. It’s pretty terrifying if you ask me.

27. Aw, a cat licking some little kid clean, what can possibly go wrong with that?

By the look in its eyes, this cat seems less likely expressing sincere love than perhaps licking this little child clean for dinner if you ask me. Seriously, this cat is so terrifying to say the least.

By the look in its eyes, this cat seems less likely expressing sincere love than perhaps licking this little child clean for dinner if you ask me. Seriously, this cat is so terrifying to say the least.

28. This sailor has a cannon only loaded with love for you, valentine.

Of course, I think the illustrator didn't recognize that the cannon is placed between the boy's legs. This sort of makes the "loaded only with love for you, valentine" seem a quite inappropriate, indeed.

Of course, I think the illustrator didn’t recognize that the cannon is placed between the boy’s legs. This sort of makes the “loaded only with love for you, valentine” have a whole new dirty meaning.

29. Happy Valentine’s Day and I’ll ski into your heart whether you like it or not.

Seriously, this girl looks as if she's gone utterly insane. I mean just look at her eyes. That's not cute, it's scary.

Seriously, this girl looks as if she’s gone utterly insane. I mean just look at her eyes. That’s not cute, it’s scary.

30. Be my valentine or I’ll send my duck billed crocodile after you.

Doesn't help that the girl is up a cactus, though I don't know why that would in the same habitat with crocodiles, I don't have the slightest idea. Also, the croc doesn't look so good.

Doesn’t help that the girl is up a cactus, though I don’t know why that would in the same habitat with crocodiles, I don’t have the slightest idea. Also, the croc doesn’t look so good.

31. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than two hot dogs in love.

Okay, hotdogs from the looks of it. And no, I don't want to know what's more. Seriously, this valentine's designer must've been high as shit when he or she came up with this idea.

Okay, hotdogs from the looks of it. And no, I don’t want to know what’s more. Seriously, this valentine’s designer must’ve been high as shit when he or she came up with this idea.

32. Happy Valentine’s Day from psycho pig.

You kill his family into pork, sausage, and bacon and he'll make sure you're as good as dead. Yes, this porker has a score to settle by the look of his eyes filled with rage.

You kill his family into pork, sausage, and bacon and he’ll make sure you’re as good as dead. Yes, this porker has a score to settle by the look of his eyes filled with rage.

33. Don’t be a dummy and be my valentine.

I know he has a ventriloquist speak through him, but this dummy just scares me for some reason. Also, is dressed like a gangster minus the top hat.

I know he has a ventriloquist speak through him, but this dummy just scares me for some reason. Also, is dressed like a gangster minus the top hat.

34. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than a crazy mouse caught in a trap.

I don't know what disturbs me more: having a valentine with a mouse with his leg caught in a trap or that the mouse seems to have gone to his happy place a long time ago. Seriously, why the hell does this card exist?

I don’t know what disturbs me more: having a valentine with a mouse with his leg caught in a trap or that the mouse seems to have gone to his happy place a long time ago. Seriously, why the hell does this card exist?

35. Be my valentine and let’s be cuffed together for all eternity.

What's this? Our grandparents' BDSM? Because those BDSM people are probably the only ones who find the idea of being handcuffed quite kinky to say the least. Seriously, why?

What’s this? Our grandparents’ BDSM? Because those BDSM people are probably the only ones who find the idea of being handcuffed quite kinky to say the least. Seriously, why?

36. Be my valentine or I’ll blow my top if you say no. And you wouldn’t like it when I’m angry.

Now the imagery is cute but the message, I'm not sure. Still, if you mess with these children, you are going to get it from the looks in their eyes. Yes, they don't seem like they're up to any good.

Now the imagery is cute but the message, I’m not sure. Still, if you mess with these children, you are going to get it from the looks in their eyes. Yes, they don’t seem like they’re up to any good.

37. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than cruelty to animals.

We all can agree that grabbing a cat by the tail is animal abuse and I'm sure the cat's not liking it. Still, this girl is like, "I'll hug him and squeeze him and keep him forever and ever." Giggle, giggle.

We all can agree that grabbing a cat by the tail is animal abuse and I’m sure the cat’s not liking it. Still, this girl is like, “I’ll hug him and squeeze him and keep him forever and ever.” Giggle, giggle.

38. Be my valentine and I won’t be the fish that got away.

And that, kids, is how mermaids are made. Let's hope this fish isn't out of the tub too long before he suffocates.

And that, kids, is how mermaids are made. Let’s hope this fish isn’t out of the tub too long before he suffocates.

39. Valentine, you are the apple of my eye.

Let's hope this Bobby just hits the apple or else, little Elsie might need to be rushed to the emergency room after this. Still, kids, don't ever try this at home. Seriously, shooting arrows over other people's heads is a really dumb thing to do and very dangerous. Dumber still is having an apple on your head for people to shoot arrows at.

Let’s hope this Bobby just hits the apple or else, little Elsie might need to be rushed to the emergency room after this. Still, kids, don’t ever try this at home. Seriously, shooting arrows over other people’s heads is a really dumb thing to do and very dangerous. Dumber still is having an apple on your head for people to shoot arrows at.

40. Valentine, even if you’d toss my love aside like Bluebeard, I’d still want you.

For one, Bluebeard is a character from European legend not some turbaned scimitar wielding guy from the Middle East with some ill intent on his face. Secondly, Bluebeard murdered the women he tossed aside as the legend entails. So it's not like he just leaves them.

For one, Bluebeard is a character from medieval European legend not some turbaned scimitar wielding guy from the Middle East with some ill intent on his face. Secondly, Bluebeard murdered the women he tossed aside as the legend entails. So it’s not like he just leaves them.

41. Must I hammer it in until you be my valentine?

I don't know about you but, isn't hammering it in kind of forcing it on somebody? I'm just saying.

I don’t know about you but, isn’t hammering it in kind of forcing it on somebody? I’m just saying.

42. Happy Valentine’s Day from the guy in your drink.

Now while this actually is supposed to be a tropical drink with ice, it's pretty freaky if you ask me. Also, I wonder if the boy was shrunk to fit in the glass or it's just a very big glass to begin with.

Now while this actually is supposed to be a tropical drink with ice, it’s pretty freaky if you ask me. Also, I wonder if the boy was shrunk to fit in the glass or it’s just a very big glass to begin with.

43. When it comes to the chase, some give up, some persist before they get the hint or restraining, and some keep trying beyond the grave.

Billy may be dead but he's still determined to win Karen's heart even if he has to do it beyond the grave. She hasn't had a good night sleep since.

Billy may be dead but he’s still determined to win Karen’s heart even if he has to do it beyond the grave. She hasn’t had a good night sleep since.

44. Surrender and be my prisoner er-I mean valentine. That’s it.

Of course, this would've been quite different if she didn't come out of the bushes. Also, the guy better watch where he puts that bayonet or his gun on that matter.

Of course, this would’ve been quite different if she didn’t come out of the bushes. Also, the guy better watch where he puts that bayonet or his gun on that matter.

45. Happy Valentine’s Day from your neighborhood 1950s diner that hires the ugly people.

Basically this is Miss Frizzle before she had the magic school bus. Of course, she went through a very awkward phase in high school and really didn't go out much with boys for obvious reasons.

Basically this is Lady Elaine back when she was working at the neighborhood of Make Believe diner and malt shop during the 1950s before it went out of business. Yes, she was going through a very awkward phase in high school.

46. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than some hot condiment on hotdog action. This time, it’s the pickle jar’s turn.

Yeah, seems like the hotdog is really turned on by how the dill pickle jar is holding the knife to put some pickles on it. Seems like BDSM even extends to the world of food, oh, my.

Yeah, seems like the hotdog is really turned on by how the dill pickle jar is holding the knife to put some pickles on it. Seems like BDSM even extends to the world of food, oh, my.

47. You’re unusual, valentine, like the bearded lady.

If I received a valentine that said I was unique like a bearded lady, I wouldn't be happy at all. I mean if you're a woman, being compared to a bearded lady is like saying "you're ugly."

If I received a valentine that said I was unique like a bearded lady, I wouldn’t be happy at all. I mean if you’re a woman, being compared to a bearded lady is like saying “you’re ugly.”

48. Happy Valentine’s Day from your generic horror movie monster whatever it is.

Hey, wolf dude, save all the creepy scary stuff for October 31st. Seriously, Valentine's Day isn't your holiday.

Hey, wolf dude, save all the creepy scary stuff for October 31st. Seriously, Valentine’s Day isn’t your holiday.

49. Be my valentine, sunshine, or I’ll kill you.

Seems like flappers were a very aggressive bunch in the 1920s. Then again, this was probably how a moll wannabe gets her gangster. Still, don't mess with this dame here.

Seems like flappers were a very aggressive bunch in the 1920s. Then again, this was probably how a moll wannabe gets her gangster. Still, don’t mess with this dame here.

50. Your eyes are brown like the harsh tobacco I inhale through too packs a day, which kills 1/3 of its users each year and is slowly killing me.

Basically this guy is telling his girlfriend that she's like a pack of cigarettes. Because he knows she's bad for him and thinks every moment he spends with her is slowly killing him from the inside yet he can't seem to quit her.

Basically this guy is telling his girlfriend that she’s like a pack of cigarettes. Because he knows she’s bad for him and thinks every moment he spends with her is slowly killing him from the inside yet he can’t seem to quit her. And if he’s with her long enough he’ll spend his last days slowly dying of cancer in the hospital if the heart attack doesn’t kill him first.

Get in the Festive Fat Tuesday Spirit with These Mardi Gras Treats

mardi-gras-dessert-table

When most Americans think about Mardi Gras, they think New Orleans. Yet, little do they know that this tradition has a lot of roots on in Continental Europe and Roman Catholicism, which was transplanted from French settlers in their North American colonies as well as Portuguese and Spanish settlers in Latin America. Now Mardi Gras isn’t really a religious holiday yet, it was celebrated the last chance to eat, drink, and be merry before Ash Wednesday, which marks the beginning of the 7 week penitential season which includes  6 weeks of Lent, followed Holy Week before Easter. Nevertheless, like a lot of religious holidays like Christmas and Easter, it has become somewhat secularized as another excuse to party. Of course, while Mardi Gras literally translates into “Fat Tuesday” in French, it has other names depending on the area like Carnival or the Feast of Fools like in The Hunchback of Notre Dame. The timing of the Mardi Gras celebrations can also vary but they usually culminate the day before Ash Wednesday. Of course, not everyone celebrates Mardi Gras like myself despite being Catholic but that’s because most of my ancestors came from Germany, Ireland, Sweden and the British Isles and that I live in Western Pennsylvania, though there is a celebration in Philadelphia. Yet, it’s a holiday where parades are held and people dress costumes with some adults having a little too much to drink or screw for that matter. Still, it’s a holiday that has a lot of associations with food. So for your viewing pleasure, here are some creative Mardi Gras treats for your artistic culinary indulgence. Being American, most of the fare will be New Orleans inspired of course.

1. Bring in the festive Mardi Gras spirit with these colorful cake pops.

Now these are certainly a colorful lot. And each one of them has a unique design. Of course, if professionally made, they'll be on discount starting from Ash Wednesday for those who haven't given up sweets for Lent.

Now these are certainly a colorful lot. And each one of them has a unique design. Of course, if professionally made, they’ll be on discount starting from Ash Wednesday for those who haven’t given up sweets for Lent.

2. Make your Mardi Gras special with this one of a kind King Cake cinnamon bread.

In some places, king cake is a dish pertaining to Epiphany which marks the end of the Christmas season. In New Orleans, it's a cuisine associated with Mardi Gras. Originally in France this was a dry French bread type dough with sugar on top and a been inside 300 years ago, it's now more or less a braided Danish cinnamon fried dough type with a small plastic doll underneath. Hundreds of these are consumed in New Orleans during the season and you'll see a lot of these.

In some places, king cake is a dish pertaining to Epiphany which marks the end of the Christmas season. In New Orleans, it’s a cuisine associated with Mardi Gras. Originally in France this was a dry French bread type dough with sugar on top and a bean inside 300 years ago, it’s now more or less a braided Danish cinnamon fried dough type with a small plastic doll underneath. Hundreds of these are consumed in New Orleans during the season and you’ll see a lot of these in this post.

3. For dessert, you can’t go wrong with these Mardi Gras jello shot squares.

Of course, a word of caution here. Despite these squares' bright color and fruitiness, these are most definitely not for kids. That is, if they contain alcohol which is very likely.

Of course, a word of caution here. Despite these squares’ bright color and fruitiness, these are most definitely not for kids. That is, if they contain alcohol which is very likely.

4. Serve your Mardi Gras guests this colorful pasta salad this Fat Tuesday season.

Of course, this contains red onion and corn to bring out the color. If you think gumbo is too hot for you, you might want to go with this.

Of course, this contains red onion and corn to bring out the color. If you think gumbo is too hot for you, you might want to go with this.

5. I do declare that no one should make Mardi Gras cupcakes without decorating them with beads.

Nevertheless, you should never serve these cupcakes to children under 3 years old for obvious reasons. Still, I also love the icing and the tiaras on some of them.

Nevertheless, you should never serve these cupcakes to children under 3 years old for obvious reasons. Still, I also love the icing and the tiaras on some of them.

6. For your Mardi Gras appetizers, treat your guests to this specially made Mardi Gras trail mix.

Now this contains popcorn, Chex Mix, peppermints, small plastic baby dolls, and white chocolate covered pretzels with sugar all over them. Of course, don't ask me about the plastic baby. It's a New Orleans thing.

Now this contains popcorn, Chex Mix, peppermints, small plastic baby dolls, and white chocolate covered pretzels with sugar all over them. Of course, don’t ask me about the plastic baby doll. It’s a New Orleans thing.

7. For those who don’t have any time to make gumbo, how about a Mardi Gras pizza instead?

Now this contains pepperoni, red onions, cheese, as well as green and yellow peppers which aren't as spice as I originally assumed in November. Nevertheless, this doesn't contain tomato sauce which is derived by a crop from South America.

Now this contains pepperoni, red onions, cheese, as well as green and yellow peppers which aren’t as spicy as I originally assumed in November. Nevertheless, this doesn’t contain tomato sauce which is derived by a crop from South America.

8. For your Mardi Gras lunch, chomp on these colorful lunch meat sandwiches.

These can range with salami and bolongna but I'm not sure if they're from Oscar Meyer. They also have bread dyed purple and yellow without crusts as far as I can see.

These can range with salami and bolongna but I’m not sure if they’re from Oscar Meyer. They also have bread dyed purple and yellow without crusts as far as I can see.

9. For something more festive and healthy, you can try this Mardi Gras wrap and salad.

Of course, you can tell this is a Mardi Gras dish because the mask appears carved from some vegetable dyed purple as are some of the carrots. Nevertheless, very colorful.

Of course, you can tell this is a Mardi Gras dish because the mask appears carved from some vegetable dyed purple as are some of the carrots. Nevertheless, very colorful.

10. Make your Mardi Gras party special with these specially made cupcakes.

Of course, you can tell that someone at a few of these if you see their lips with a very unnatural color like green or purple. Yet, each looks pretty in its own way.

Of course, you can tell that someone at a few of these if you see their lips with a very unnatural color like green or purple. Yet, each looks pretty in its own way.

11. Nothing makes a Mardi Gras party than a large cake with a purple mask with yellow, purple, and green feathers.

You'll see a few of these on this post for there are so many for some reason. This is certainly professionally made. Yet, you have to admire the artistry on this.

You’ll see a few of these on this post for there are so many for some reason. This is certainly professionally made. Yet, you have to admire the artistry on this.

12. Bring the festive spirit into Mardi Gras with these one of a kind cookies.

Now these come from a website called Custom Cookies.com so they're professionally made. Items include jester hats, jesters, crowns, the Fleur de Lis, beads, masks, and music notes.

Now these come from a website called Custom Cookies.com so they’re professionally made. Items include jester hats, jesters, crowns, the Fleur de Lis, beads, masks, and music notes.

13. You can’t enjoy Mardi Gras without putting some candy beads on your cupcakes.

Now I think these are made from candy. I mean they sure don't look shiny to me. Yet, you'd still wouldn't want them near kids under 3 years old for obvious reasons.

Now I think these are made from candy. I mean they sure don’t look shiny to me. Yet, you’d still wouldn’t want them near kids under 3 years old for obvious reasons.

14. Nothing says Mardi Gras than cakes of women’s bosoms with their beads on them.

Seems like while doing these posts, I seem to find how heart cookie cutters can be used for so many occasions. Yet, I'm not sure if I approve of this for families since this is reflective of the Mardi Gras party scene that might carry some unfortunate implications.

Seems like while doing these posts, I seem to find how heart cookie cutters can be used for so many occasions. Yet, I’m not sure if I approve of this for families since this is reflective of the Mardi Gras party scene that might carry some unfortunate implications.

15. So if you wear a mask this Mardi Gras then so should your cupcakes.

Of course, these purple masks and feathers are made from icing while the cupcake is covered with white icing and sugar. Guaranteed to make some people give up their New Year's Resolutions for Lent.

Of course, these purple masks and feathers are made from icing while the cupcake is covered with white icing and sugar. Guaranteed to make some people give up their New Year’s Resolutions for Lent.

16. Treat your guests this Mardi Gras with these joker cookies.

Of course, while these cookies may look cute, they may contain beads that aren't suitable for children under 3 years old. I'm just saying to all you parents out there.

Of course, while these cookies may look cute, they may contain beads that aren’t suitable for children under 3 years old. I’m just saying to all you parents out there.

17. Of course, if you live in New Orleans, you can’t have Mardi Gras without some music note and star cookies.

Because we all know that New Orleans is known for jazz music as well as Hurricane Katrina, zydeco, crime, levees, and FEMA fiascos. Also, those plastic babies near the star cookies are absolutely creepy.

Because we all know that New Orleans is known for jazz music as well as Hurricane Katrina, zydeco, crime, levees, and FEMA fiascos. Also, those plastic babies near the star cookies are absolutely creepy.

18. Celebrate your Mardi Gras with these specially made crown cookies.

What's even better about these cookies is that they were made from chocolate dough or gingerbread by what it looks like. Still, they all seem to have intricate designs.

What’s even better about these cookies is that they were made from chocolate dough or gingerbread by what it looks like. Still, they all seem to have intricate designs as if it was done by a professional or someone with too much time on their hands.

19. Top your Mardi Gras party off with a giant mask cupcake display.

Now this might be for some special event of some sort. Still, that's a lot of cupcakes and how they keep them on without the icing sliding off amazes me. Yet, the best part about this display is that all the cupcakes are chocolate.

Now this might be for some special event of some sort. Still, that’s a lot of cupcakes and how they keep them on without the icing sliding off amazes me. Yet, the best part about this display is that all the cupcakes are chocolate.

20. Bring the festivities alive with these Mardi Gras cookies on a stick.

These may be from a Louisiana based startup called Cajun Home Sweets. Of course, these had to be professionally made since the mask details are all so fine and intricate.

These may be from a Louisiana based startup called Cajun Home Sweets. Of course, these had to be professionally made since the mask details are all so fine and intricate.

21. Make your Mardi Gras memborable with this lovely mask and feather cake.

Of course, this cake has a lot of things we know of Mardi Gras like feathers, mask, confetti, Doubloons, and beads as you'd see in New Orleans. Also a background of green, purple, and yellow.

Of course, this cake has a lot of things we know of Mardi Gras like feathers, mask, confetti, Doubloons, and beads as you’d see in New Orleans. Also a background of green, purple, and yellow.

22. Of course, no New Orleans resident can forget to celebrate Mardi Gras without a king cake.

Now this is what the modern New Orleans King Cake looks like. Notice how it resembles a giant braided Danish garland? Also, the baby doll on this thing is creepy.

Now this is what the modern New Orleans King Cake looks like. Notice how it resembles a giant braided Danish garland? Also, the baby doll on this thing is creepy.

23. Make Mardi Gras a festive occasion with these lovely cupcakes.

These cupcake icing designs were probably made by: a. a professional, b. a repressed art student, c. someone who's had too much of the Mardi Gras ganja, or d. all of the above.

These cupcake icing designs were probably made by: a. a professional, b. a repressed art student, c. someone who’s had too much of the Mardi Gras ganja, or d. all of the above.

24. What doesn’t bring Mardi Gras to its roots than the Fleur de Lis?

Of course, the Fleur de Lis is a symbol of France and the French royal family in the Bourbon dynasty days. It was even on France's flag until the French Revolution. Still, these cookies look delicious.

Of course, the Fleur de Lis is a symbol of France and the French royal family in the Bourbon dynasty days. It was even on France’s flag until the French Revolution. Still, these cookies look delicious.

25. Get lucky this Mardi Gras with these specially designed fortune cookies.

Available in yellow, purple, and green at a New Orleans Asian restaurant near you. Of course, I don't know about using the green and purple food coloring but it works.

Available in yellow, purple, and green at a New Orleans Asian restaurant near you. Of course, I don’t know about using the green and purple food coloring but it works.

26. For even greater luck on Mardi Gras, try this giant fortune cookie up for size.

Now this fortune cookie is covered in yellow, purple, and green sprinkles. Don't say I didn't warn you in case you open it. Then again, it's probably made from cake.

Now this fortune cookie is covered in yellow, purple, and green sprinkles. Don’t say I didn’t warn you in case you open it. Then again, it’s probably made from cake.

27. Hope these jester cupcakes manage to put a smile on your face this Mardi Gras.

Of course, I'm not sure if the jesters are edible but all seem to have their own characteristics as individuals. Also, some of them have masks on, too.

Of course, I’m not sure if the jesters are edible but all seem to have their own characteristics as individuals. Also, some of them have masks on, too.

28. Make your kids the perfect Mardi Gras lunch with this King Rex crown sandwich.

Of course, this seems like a decent healthy lunch with a better content than whatever Nutrition Inc. makes. However, I think the purple broccoli is kind of pushing it with the Mardi Gras spirit. Seriously, purple broccoli belongs in somebody's acid trip.

Of course, this seems like a decent healthy lunch with a better content than whatever Nutrition Inc. makes. However, I think the purple broccoli is kind of pushing it with the Mardi Gras spirit. Seriously, purple broccoli belongs in somebody’s acid trip.

29. Make your Mardi Gras memorable with this set of sugar cookies.

I like how some of the cookies resembling Mardi Gras beads and how they're designed. I can never master something like that, not in a million years.

I like how some of the cookies resembling Mardi Gras beads and how they’re designed. I can never master something like that, not in a million years.

30. Wake up this Fast Tuesday to these king cake donuts.

Of course, these are the pastries most likely consumed by the New Orleans police department which is usually busy on Mardi Gras arresting topless drunk women for indecent exposure and maybe suspicion on prostitution.

Of course, these are the pastries most likely consumed by the New Orleans police department which is usually busy on Mardi Gras arresting topless drunk women for indecent exposure and maybe suspicion on prostitution.

31. Treat yourself right this Mardi Gras with this colorful Mardi Gras salad.

Now this contains carrots, kale, and red cabbage. Yet, the carrots may be heirloom and only available at Whole Foods. Still, yellow peppers may do fine.

Now this contains carrots, kale, and red cabbage. Yet, the carrots may be heirloom and only available at Whole Foods. Still, yellow peppers may do fine.

32. Give a toast this Mardi Gras with these king cake jello shots.

Yes, I know these probably contain alcohol and aren't for kids. Yet, they certainly display quite vibrant colors as you see here.

Yes, I know these probably contain alcohol and aren’t for kids. Yet, they certainly display quite vibrant colors as you see here.

33. Celebrate your Mardi Gras with these king cake cinnamon sugar cookies.

Now I know these aren't donuts because they're flat but I love the swirl icing design on these. Still, I'd eat them.

Now I know these aren’t donuts because they’re flat but I love the swirl icing design on these. Still, I’d eat them.

34. For Mardi Gras, candy coated popcorn makes a great snack.

Of course, candy coated popcorn may be festive for Mardi Gras but it's not good for you, especially for your teeth. Yet, I do like how it looks in this photo.

Of course, candy coated popcorn may be festive for Mardi Gras but it’s not good for you, especially for your teeth. Yet, I do like how it looks in this photo.

35. Send your kid with a mask pancake lunch this Mardi Gras.

Now this combines the rituals of French Mardi Gras with the traditions of British Shrove Tuesday that usually consists of pancake breakfasts. Of course, where I live Shrove Tuesday isn't celebrated there either.

Now this combines the rituals of French Mardi Gras with the traditions of British Shrove Tuesday that usually consists of pancake breakfasts. Of course, where I live Shrove Tuesday isn’t celebrated there either.

36. Of course, if your kid doesn’t like pancakes, you can always send him or her a sandwich with a Fleur de Lis.

Of course, other than the Mardi Gras imagery, there's really nothing remarkable about this lunch. Of course, Mardi Gras isn't really a children's holiday like Christmas and Easter are.

Of course, other than the Mardi Gras imagery, there’s really nothing remarkable about this lunch. Of course, Mardi Gras isn’t really a children’s holiday like Christmas and Easter are.

37. Treat your Mardi Gras party guests to this tearaway mask cupcake cake.

Now this is may not be as messy as cutting it, but I'm sure whoever took hours to work on it will be crying when he or she sees it being torn to pieces. Still, quite festive.

Now this is may not be as messy as cutting it, but I’m sure whoever took hours to work on it will be crying when he or she sees it being torn to pieces. Still, quite festive.

38. Of course, if you’re no fan of donut holes, you can always settle for king cake long johns.

I know they look like custom designed Mardi Gras twinkies covered in icing, but hey, to each his own. Of course, consumed by New Orleans cops arresting people for public intoxication and indecent exposure.

I know they look like custom designed Mardi Gras twinkies covered in icing, but hey, to each his own. Of course, consumed by New Orleans cops arresting people for public intoxication and indecent exposure.

39. For the New Orleans Francophile, here’s a nice tearaway cupcake cake of the Fleur de Lis.

Of course, the best part about this design is that it's purple. Still, since it was originally a French colony, Louisiana bases a lot of its tradition on French culture with their legal basis being the Napoleonic Code.

Of course, the best part about this design is that it’s purple. Still, since it was originally a French colony, Louisiana bases a lot of its tradition on French culture with their legal basis being the Napoleonic Code.

40. Celebrate this Mardi Gras with this vibrantly colorful king cake.

Unlike the previous 2 king cakes I've shown, this one has multi colored icing instead of sugar. Nevertheless, I find the presence of plastic baby dolls on these quite disturbing. Maybe it's the baby carrot cake from Cakewrecks or something.

Unlike the previous 2 king cakes I’ve shown, this one has multi colored icing instead of sugar. Nevertheless, I find the presence of plastic baby dolls on these quite disturbing. Maybe it’s the baby carrot cake from Cakewrecks or something.

41. No Mardi Gras party is complete without these mask cookies.

Of course, some mask cookies have holes in them and others don't. In this one, the eye holes are covered in black icing. Yet, each mask is unique in its own way.

Of course, some mask cookies have holes in them and others don’t. In this one, the eye holes are covered in black icing. Yet, each mask is unique in its own way.

42. Of course, for those who don’t like jello shots there’s always jello slices for the Mardi Gras party.

Like the jello shots, just because they're brightly colored and made from jello doesn't mean they're for children. In fact, they might contain alcohol as well. Just, giving some people cause for parental discretion.

Like the jello shots, just because they’re brightly colored and made from jello doesn’t mean they’re for children. In fact, they might contain alcohol as well. Just, giving some people cause for parental discretion.

43. No Mardi Gras party is complete without an elaborate mask cake like this.

This cake is lined with some gold Spanish Doubloons that are more likely made from plastic to some Golden Age pirate's chagrin. Yet, you can tell that this was professionally made and very expensive.

This cake is lined with some gold Spanish Doubloons that are more likely made from plastic to some Golden Age pirate’s chagrin. Yet, you can tell that this was professionally made and very expensive.

44. Besides Hurricane Katrina, most people know New Orleans for 2 things: Mardi Gras and jazz music as these cookies illustrate.

Of course, we have a couple designs of Mardi Gras masks along with a face with dangling notes and piano hair as I see it at least. Yes, these were undoubtedly made in the Big Easy.

Of course, we have a couple designs of Mardi Gras masks along with a face with dangling notes and piano hair as I see it at least. Yes, these were undoubtedly made in the Big Easy.

45. When it comes to Mardi Gras cakes, sometimes 2 tiers are better than one.

I have to admire the decorations on this like the beads, the party stuff, and the feather mask. I also like the swirls, too.

I have to admire the decorations on this like the beads, the party stuff, and the feather mask. I also like the swirls, too.

46. Now you can’t have a Mardi Gras party without including truffle chocolate beads.

Come to think of it, truffle chocolate beads must be more expensive than regular plastic Mardi Gras beads you can find at any dollar store in your area. Yet, these seem to resemble beads from some higher end store.

Come to think of it, truffle chocolate beads must be more expensive than regular plastic Mardi Gras beads you can find at any dollar store in your area. Yet, these seem to resemble beads from some higher end store.

47. For Mardi Gras, some people prefer whipped cream with sprinkles on their jello shots.

Once again, jello shots usually contain alcohol and therefore aren't for kids. Nevertheless, if any parent wants to make non-alcoholic jello shots, then be my guest.

Once again, jello shots usually contain alcohol and therefore aren’t for kids. Nevertheless, if any parent wants to make non-alcoholic jello shots, then be my guest.

48. Now these New Orleans mask cookies are bound to make any Mardi Gras party festive.

Now these masks cookies are certainly elaborate and made by professionals. There's even a jazz one, too. Nevertheless, the ribbons aren't edible but they do add some sense of artistry to them.

Now these masks cookies are certainly elaborate and made by professionals. There’s even a jazz one, too. Nevertheless, the ribbons aren’t edible but they do add some sense of artistry to them.

49. For favors, you can’t go wrong with these Mardi Gras pretzels.

Now these are covered with either white chocolate or icing and decked with sugar. Maybe it would be easier to add food coloring but I didn't make these.

Now these are covered with either white chocolate or icing and decked with sugar. Maybe it would be easier to add food coloring but I didn’t make these.

50. Start your Mardi Gras morning with some Mardi Gras pancakes.

Of course, these pancakes are yellow, purple, and green for Mardi Gras. Perhaps they should add green eggs and ham to it as well, but I'm not Dr. Seuss.

Of course, these pancakes are yellow, purple, and green for Mardi Gras. Perhaps they should add green eggs and ham to it as well, but I’m not Dr. Seuss.

51. For the vegetable in your Mardi Gras dinner go with this festive salad.

Contains quinoa, broccoli, nuts, and cauliflower dyed purple and yellow as if it's from the Green Eggs and Ham world of Dr. Seuss. Seriously, I don't know what to make about food coloring. I know it's safe but it sometimes gives the wrong impression.

Contains quinoa, broccoli, nuts, and cauliflower dyed purple and yellow as if it’s from the Green Eggs and Ham world of Dr. Seuss. Seriously, I don’t know what to make about food coloring. I know it’s safe but it sometimes gives the wrong impression.

52. Now there’s nothing more festive on Mardi Gras than this lovely 2 tiered cake.

I do like the nice prop usage on this cake such as the mask, crown, Doubloons, and beads. Yet, I wonder if this cake is chocolate underneath the icing.

I do like the nice prop usage on this cake such as the mask, crown, Doubloons, and beads. Yet, I wonder if this cake is chocolate underneath the icing. But I don’t want to destroy it for now.

53. For you theater geeks out there, I think these cupcakes would be quite appropriate for your Mardi Gras celebration.

Not only do some of these cupcakes carry the traditional feathery Mardi Gras mask, they also have the tragedy and comedy masks as well. And it seems like they're edible but I can be wrong.

Not only do some of these cupcakes carry the traditional feathery Mardi Gras mask, they also have the tragedy and comedy masks as well. And it seems like they’re edible but I can be wrong.

54. Then again, you can always buy Mardi Gras cake toppers in New Orleans.

Yet, I'm not sure whether the cupcake toppers on these are edible or not. However, I do love the purple icing on them though. Hey, I love purple. I can't help it.

Yet, I’m not sure whether the cupcake toppers on these are edible or not. However, I do love the purple icing on them though. Hey, I love purple. I can’t help it.

55. For your Mardi Gras party, you can’t go wrong with icing covered star pretzels.

I'm not sure about the significance of stars on Mardi Gras but I think these pretzels are quite clever. Now where can I get pretzel stars in PA?

I’m not sure about the significance of stars on Mardi Gras but I think these pretzels are quite clever. Now where can I get pretzel stars in PA?

56. Feast your eyes on this Mardi Gras pizza for lunch.

Now these seem to contain, cheese, meat, and red onions. Yet, I'm sure the little leaf provides the green, whatever that is.

Now these seem to contain, cheese, meat, and red onions. Yet, I’m sure the little leaf provides the green, whatever that is.

57. Hope your kids will love these king cake donuts.

I'm not sure about the little face in the donuts are about. Yet, these are sure cute that your kids will certainly enjoy them, even though they may be too young to take part in the other festivities.

I’m not sure about the little face in the donuts are about. Yet, these are sure cute that your kids will certainly enjoy them, even though they may be too young to take part in the other festivities.

58. Now this cookie set will sure make your Mardi Gras worthwhile.

Now this includes cake pops with white icing and sprinkles, coins with a Fleur de Lis, and butterfly masks each unique in their own way.

Now this includes cake pops with white icing and sprinkles, coins with a Fleur de Lis, and butterfly masks each unique in their own way.

59. Now I’ve never seen a Mardi Gras mask cake like this before.

I'm not sure if that mask is made from confection or plastic. Either way, it looks very cool and quite intimidating.

I’m not sure if that mask is made from confection or plastic. Either way, it looks very cool and quite intimidating.

60. With Mardi Gras cakes, you can’t have too many tiers.

Now I love how these tiers don't seem to look the same. I especially like the mask on top with the feathers and stickers. So pretty.

Now I love how these tiers don’t seem to look the same. I especially like the mask on top with the feathers and stickers. So pretty.

61. For party favors, I can’t see anything wrong with Mardi Gras chocolate candies.

Well, except for the person being allergic to chocolate of course. Nevertheless, these look so good enough to eat and those you know me know how I like candy.

Well, except for the person being allergic to chocolate of course. Nevertheless, these look so good enough to eat and those you know me know how I like candy.

62. Celebrate Mardi Gras with these multicolored cake pops.

Now unlike the previous cake pops these were placed face down. I'll take a purple one though.

Now unlike the previous cake pops these were placed face down. I’ll take a purple one though, especially if it has chocolate inside.

63. Wake up this Mardi Gras morning with these specially made cinnamon rolls.

This person didn't have any purple sugar for the cinnabuns so he or she used black instead. I don't think it turned out very well.

This person didn’t have any purple sugar for the cinnabuns so he or she used black instead. I don’t think it turned out very well.

64. Nothing brings the festive spirit on Fat Tuesday than this jester cake.

For a jester cake, this one seems quite sad and has a lot of stuff that isn't edible. Yet, it looks pretty cool though.

For a jester cake, this one seems quite sad and has a lot of stuff that isn’t edible. Yet, it looks pretty cool though.

65. Of course, there’s nothing remarkable about these Mardi Gras cupcakes or is there?

Outside they may just be regular cupcakes with chocolate icing. Inside they have yellow, green, and purple interiors. So they're certainly festive underneath the wrapper and frosting.

Outside they may just be regular cupcakes with chocolate icing. Inside they have yellow, green, and purple interiors. So they’re certainly festive underneath the wrapper and frosting.

66. These Fleur de Lis cookies will certainly make your Mardi Gras party memorable.

Unlike the other treats, they're composed with black, white, and possibly blue. Also, they are quite nice to eat. Hope they weren't made by Saints fans. Probably were.

Unlike the other treats, they’re composed with black, white, and possibly blue. Also, they are quite nice to eat. Hope they weren’t made by Saints fans. Probably were.

67. Nothing makes a great Mardi Gras party without covering pretzels and cookies in chocolate.

I know these are Mardi Gras treats since they all have yellow, green and purple stripes on them. And that they have a mask chocolate with them.

I know these are Mardi Gras treats since they all have yellow, green and purple stripes on them. And that they have a mask chocolate with them.

68. With Mardi Gras, you can’t add too many accessories.

I like the gold party strings and the feather mask. I also like the stars on the cake as well as the yellow diamonds.

I like the gold party strings and the feather mask. I also like the stars on the cake as well as the yellow diamonds.

69. These Mardi Gras cake balls are good enough to pop in your mouth.

I also like how they have green and yellow drizzle as well as have purple wrappers on them. Still, I hope these have chocolate filling in them or I won't be happy.

I also like how they have green and yellow drizzle as well as have purple wrappers on them. Still, I hope these have chocolate filling in them or I won’t be happy.

70. For Mardi Gras, mask cupcakes are a festive sight, especially with decorations.

They may not be for children under 3 years old. Yet, they certainly look great for a party on Mardi Gras.

They may not be for children under 3 years old. Yet, they certainly look great for a party on Mardi Gras.

Dig Into These Groundhog Day Treats

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Groundhog Day is a cultural holiday on February 2nd which revolves around a certain rodent coming out of its burrow to see its shadow, which will determine the weather conditions in the coming weeks (not really). If it sees its shadow, then it’s 6 more weeks of winter. If it doesn’t, early spring or so the legend says. If it comes out of its burrow situated on the wrong side of the road, then it’s basically roadkill (just kidding, but that one is probably true). Now I am no believer in rodent weather meteorology and I can even say that human meteorologists aren’t accurate on the local news. Hell, the closest thing I come to when celebrating Groundhog Day is basically watching part of The AMC marathon of Groundhog Day starring Bill Murray when Punxatawney Phil not only sees his shadow on that particular day but every day. Yet, in some parts of Pennsylvania, Groundhog Day is taken very seriously. In the southeast part of the state, Groundhog Lodges celebrate the holiday with fersommlinge, social events in which food is served, speeches are made, and one or more g’spiel (plays or skits) are performed for entertainment. At this event, only the Pennsylvania German dialect is spoken and those speaking English must pay a fee in a bowl at the center table. Yet, the largest Groundhog Day celebration is in Punxsutawney where crowds of as much as 40,000 gather to see Punxsutawney Phil see his shadow. This event has been a town staple since 1886 and is still going strong, especially since the move Groundhog Day. There’s also a lot of partying going on in the area as well. So if you need to make some treats for Groundhog Day, then come no further than me for some suggestions. So without further adieu, I give you some Groundhog Day treats for your viewing pleasure.

1. Nothing would please your party guests more than these adorable groundhog popping cupcakes.

I'm not sure if the groundhogs are edible. Yet, I am absolutely certain that the green icing will make your tongues green for awhile. Still, adorable.

I’m not sure if the groundhogs are edible. Yet, I am absolutely certain that the green icing will make your tongues green for awhile. Still, adorable.

2. See that these cupcakes depict Punxsutawney Phil coming out from his little den.

Of course, the icing seems like it's either yellow snow or light brown dirt. Yet, at least the groundhogs are basically cuter than the real thing (which isn't much to look at).

Of course, the icing seems like it’s either yellow snow or light brown dirt. Yet, at least the groundhogs are basically cuter than the real thing (which isn’t much to look at).

3. Nothing hits the spot this Groundhog day than some groundhog pudding.

Now I like how this cute groundhog looks with his face, paws, and ears being made from vanilla wafers. Still, I bet the eyes, nose, and teeth are icing.

Now I like how this cute groundhog looks with his face, paws, and ears being made from vanilla wafers. Still, I bet the eyes, nose, and teeth are icing.

4. Treat your kids this Groundhog Day with these tasty groundhog cookies.

Now these are just so cute. Wonder where they could get those groundhog cookie cutters. Still, would be a shame seeing them get run over by a car, wouldn't it?

Now these are just so cute. Wonder where they could get those groundhog cookie cutters. Still, would be a shame seeing them get run over by a car, wouldn’t it?

5. No Groundhog Day party is complete without a cake of Punxsutawney Phil rising from the ground.

Now this cake groundhog seems to resemble a bear with buck teeth. Or one of those animals from Whack-A-Mole. Still, this should feed plenty of your guests.

Now this cake groundhog seems to resemble a bear with buck teeth. Or one of those animals from Whack-A-Mole. Still, this should feed plenty of your guests.

6. Nothing graces a Groundhog Day party table than acorn pretzels.

I like how these pretzels are filled with peanut butter and are half covered in chocolate. Can I take one, please?

I like how these pretzels are filled with peanut butter and are half covered in chocolate. Can I take one, please?

7. Of course, you don’t always need pretzels to make acorns.

Now these are made of Hershey's kisses, peanut butter chocolate chips, white icing, and vanilla wafers. Seem to have the same effect as peanut butter sandwich cookies from my Thanksgiving post.

Now these are made of Hershey’s kisses, peanut butter chocolate chips, white icing, and vanilla wafers. Seem to have the same effect as peanut butter sandwich cookies from my Thanksgiving post.

8. Now you can’t make candy groundhogs without Almond Joy can you? Or at least I think it’s Almond Joy.

Now these groundhogs sure are cute. However, I think that Almond Joy bars are disgusting since they're filled with coconut. Then again, these could be peanut cookies with nuts on top of them.

Now these groundhogs sure are cute. However, I think that Almond Joy bars are disgusting since they’re filled with coconut. Then again, these could be peanut cookies with nuts on top of them.

9. Celebrate your Groundhog Day with this one of a kind cake of Bill Murray.

Because if you're Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, every day is Groundhog Day. Of course, we've all seen the movie have we? I mean it's on AMC on February 2 for 24 hours, since it's kind of the point.

Because if you’re Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, every day is Groundhog Day. Of course, we’ve all seen the movie have we? I mean it’s on AMC on February 2 for 24 hours, since it’s kind of the point.

10. This groundhog cake is staring right at me.

I'm not sure if Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow through the chocolate dirt. Yet, I can't help thinking how adorable he is, which is a lot of what I can say about most groundhogs, particularly Gus who was the spokesman for the Pennsylvania Lottery.

I’m not sure if Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow through the chocolate dirt. Yet, I can’t help thinking how adorable he is, which is a lot of what I can say about most groundhogs, particularly Gus who was the spokesman for the Pennsylvania Lottery.

11. For those who don’t like cake, then here is a nice Groundhog Day fruit tart.

I call this a tart because it seems like it's on a smaller plate. Yet, I'm sure this groundhog looks as if it's been run over or something. Somehow it looks like either a bear or possum.

I call this a tart because it seems like it’s on a smaller plate. Yet, I’m sure this groundhog looks as if it’s been run over or something. Somehow it looks like either a bear or possum.

12. For your Groundhog Day party, how about some groundhog pizza to make it more festive?

Now this contains tomato sauce, olives, peppers, tomatoes, and cheese. Yet, it seems to resemble a groundhog's insides for some reason. I don't know why.

Now this contains tomato sauce, olives, peppers, tomatoes, and cheese. Yet, it seems to resemble a groundhog’s insides for some reason. I don’t know why.

13. Wake up in the morning to these Groundhog Day jelly donuts.

Of course you can tell they have jelly in them because there are fruit in the their eyes. Best treat you can give to your neighborhood Punxsutawney police officer. Seriously, they'll need it.

Of course you can tell they have jelly in them because there are fruit in the their eyes. Best treat you can give to your neighborhood Punxsutawney police officer. Seriously, they’ll need it.

14. Have your kid eat lunch on Groundhog Day with this one of a kind groundhog lunch sandwich.

Okay, now the ground is made from a whole wheat tortilla while the groundhog is made from bread. The grass is of lettuce and cucumber. And the white stuff of cheese. Yet, I'm sure your child will love it since it's so cute.

Okay, now the ground is made from a whole wheat tortilla while the groundhog is made from bread. The grass is of lettuce and cucumber. And the white stuff of cheese. Yet, I’m sure your child will love it since it’s so cute.

15. Now let’s see if this little guy could see his shadow.

Now it seems that Punxsutawney Phil is coming out of his den as if it's an egg shell. However, I like how they use a flower and snow just to blend both possibilities.

Now it seems that Punxsutawney Phil is coming out of his den as if it’s an egg shell. However, I like how they use a flower and snow just to blend both possibilities.

16. Treat your kids this Groundhog day with these groundhog cake pops.

Of course, you have sprinkles for the hair as well as M&Ms for the cheeks and ears. As for the eyes and nose, I bet you they're candy. Still, adorable.

Of course, you have sprinkles for the hair as well as M&Ms for the cheeks and ears. As for the eyes and nose, I bet you they’re candy. Still, adorable.

17. Of course, you can’t have Groundhog Day without these groundhog heart cookies.

I like how the ears are made from chocolate chips and the eyes from icing and peanut butter chips as well. Yet, I'm not sure using a raisin for a nose is a great idea. Because I don't like raisins.

I like how the ears are made from chocolate chips and the eyes from icing and peanut butter chips as well. Yet, I’m not sure using a raisin for a nose is a great idea. Because I don’t like raisins.

18. Will Punxsutawney Phil see his shadow over the giant wall of chocolate bundt?

Now I like how this person used flour for snow on this chocolate bundt cake. And I think the groundhog in the center is just so adorable.

Now I like how this person used flour for snow on this chocolate bundt cake. And I think the groundhog in the center is just so adorable.

19. Now you can make your Groundhog Day cupcakes with Oreos and M&Ms for the groundhog’s face.

Now these M&Ms can come in many different colors so there are plenty of groundhog kinds to choose from. I'll take the one with the blue cheeks, please.

Now these M&Ms can come in many different colors so there are plenty of groundhog kinds to choose from. I’ll take the one with the blue cheeks, please.

20. Nothing makes Groundhog Day better than a cheese ball of Gobbler’s Knob.

Sure I think the groundhog might not be edible but there aren't a lot of Groundhog Day food ideas on Google Images. So I'll take it.

Sure I think the groundhog might not be edible but there aren’t a lot of Groundhog Day food ideas on Google Images. So I’ll take it.

21. As a side dish for your Groundhog Day dinner, have a helping of these little groundhog buns.

I like how they're in these little cups as if they're coming out of their dens. Also like their cute little ears, too.

I like how they’re in these little cups as if they’re coming out of their dens. Also like their cute little ears, too.

22. Entertain your guests this Groundhog Day with these cookies of Punxsutawney Phil coming out of his den.

I like how they used the teddy bear heads and made them pop out of their holes. Also like the use of sugar and icing as if it was dirt. Still, these are adorable.

I like how they used the teddy bear heads and made them pop out of their holes. Also like the use of sugar and icing as if it was dirt. Still, these are adorable.

23. Now nobody should celebrate Groundhog Day without these dirt pudding bowls.

Of course, these groundhogs are made from sandwich cookies, chocolate chips, almonds, peanut butter chips, and icing. Still, the Oreo dirt can also stand in for asphalt. Just saying.

Of course, these groundhogs are made from sandwich cookies, chocolate chips, almonds, peanut butter chips, and icing. Still, the Oreo dirt can also stand in for asphalt. Just saying.

24. Wake up from your den this Groundhog Day morning with this groundhog face pancake.

He many not be able to see his own shadow, but he may be able to see yours. Still, you have to admire how this person used bananas, marshmallows, and chocolate chips for the features.

He many not be able to see his own shadow, but he may be able to see yours. Still, you have to admire how this person used bananas, marshmallows, and chocolate chips for the features.

25. If you don’t like groundhog pancakes for breakfast, I’m sure these groundhog donuts will catch your fancy.

Actually these Groundhog Day doughnut treats are better suited for dessert than breakfast. Yet, they still use the same kind of sandwich cookies as the previous pudding ones.

Actually these Groundhog Day donut treats are better suited for dessert than breakfast. Yet, they still use the same kind of sandwich cookies as the previous pudding ones.

26. Experience how Punxsutawney Phil gets out of his den with these Groundhog Day push pops.

Of course, these are probably mostly made from icing and cake as well as other toppings like sprinkles for grass. Still, this is very cute.

Of course, these are probably mostly made from icing and cake as well as other toppings like sprinkles for grass. Still, this is very cute.

27. Whether it be 6 more weeks of winter or an early spring, you can’t have a Groundhog Day dinner without a groundhog hotdog.

As seen here, you can use your groundhog hotdog in buns or mashed potatoes. Yet, I'm not sure how they got the ears.

As seen here, you can use your groundhog hotdog in buns or mashed potatoes. Yet, I’m not sure how they got the ears for these though.

28. If you’re not keen with the groundhog getting out of his den, here are some cupcakes with its face on them.

Now these seem to resemble all kinds of rodents like wood chuks or beavers. Still, they're adorable with their chocolate chip and icing eyes as well as buck teeth.

Now these seem to resemble all kinds of rodents like wood chuks or beavers. Still, they’re adorable with their chocolate chip and icing eyes as well as buck teeth.

29. Come out of your den this Groundhog day with this little sausage rodent in rice.

Of course, it seems to be in with some veggies and grapes. Yet, I'm sure it's made from ground beef. I just used "sausage" because it's shaped that way.

Of course, it seems to be in with some veggies and grapes. Yet, I’m sure it’s made from ground beef. I just used “sausage” because it’s shaped that way.

30. Treat your guests this Groundhog Day with these pop up groundhog cookies.

Of course it's fair to say that these groundhogs are made from candy bars or chocolate. Yet, they're still quite adorable. And the cookies actually look like dirt.

Of course it’s fair to say that these groundhogs are made from candy bars or chocolate. Yet, they’re still quite adorable. And the cookies actually look like dirt.

31. Nothing makes a Groundhog Day dinner complete than a groundhog meatloaf.

Now despite being made from ground meat, this one doesn't look very pleasant for some reason. Yet, you have to love its whiskers.

Now despite being made from ground meat, this one doesn’t look very pleasant for some reason. Yet, you have to love its whiskers.

32. If you can’t create groundhogs, then I suppose bear cookies will do just fine.

Well, of course, some of the crumbs serve as dirt as well but light soil means clay. Also, the cupcake is covered in green sprinkles for grass.

Well, of course, some of the crumbs serve as dirt as well but light soil means clay. Also, the cupcake is covered in green sprinkles for grass.

33. Looks like there are a lot of groundhogs popping from this cake.

I like how all the groundhog cake pops are attached to this green cake, which I think is charming. Also, those groundhogs are quite cute if I do say so myself.

I like how all the groundhog cake pops are attached to this green cake, which I think is charming. Also, those groundhogs are quite cute if I do say so myself.

34. Of course, you can’t do wrong on Groundhog Day with these pop up cookies.

If these were Halloween cookies, they'd work well as tombstones. Yet, I guess chocolate covered cookies were used for groundhogs.

If these were Halloween cookies, they’d work well as tombstones. Yet, I guess chocolate covered cookies were used for groundhogs.

35. If you don’t have any chocolate pudding perhaps chocolate chips and ice cream can substitute for dirt just fine.

Of course, I'm not sure if chocolate ice cream would make this taste better. However, I do like how they used vanilla wafers as groundhogs and almond ears.

Of course, I’m not sure if chocolate ice cream would make this taste better. However, I do like how they used vanilla wafers as groundhogs and almond ears.

36. Of course, you don’t need icing for a groundhog cupcake if you can use a Snicker’s bar.

 And I suppose the teeth are made from candy corn possibly left over from Halloween. Not to mention, the grass and snow probably consist of coconut. Yet, each setting is to highlight the 2 possible outcomes.


And I suppose the teeth are made from candy corn possibly left over from Halloween. Not to mention, the grass and snow probably consist of coconut. Yet, each setting is to highlight the 2 possible outcomes.

37. If you’re in the mood for ice cream on February 2nd, perhaps try this groundhog sundae.

This might contain chocolate ice cream, chocolate pudding, whipped cream, and a nut bar. Still, it looks pretty cute but may cause diabetes or a sugar high.

This might contain chocolate ice cream, chocolate pudding, whipped cream, and a nut bar. Still, it looks pretty cute but may cause diabetes or a sugar high.

38. These groundhog donuts are certainly a real treat.

Now white donuts symbolize 6 more weeks of winter while chocolate ones stand in for early spring. Either way, the groundhogs are very adorable with the buck marshmallow teeth and chocolate chip eyes and noses.

Now white donuts symbolize 6 more weeks of winter while chocolate ones stand in for early spring. Either way, the groundhogs are very adorable with the buck marshmallow teeth and chocolate chip eyes and noses.

39. Of course, these marshmallow teddy bears would make fine groundhogs for these cookies.

Of course, these sugar covered marshmallow candies are hardly edible stuff. Yet, these cookies look so adorable just the same.

Of course, these sugar covered marshmallow candies are hardly edible stuff. Yet, these cookies look so adorable just the same.

40. Of course these peanut sandwich cookies should do nicely for your Groundhog Day cupcakes.

Of course, the chocolate icing is already sprinkled with green sugar that would've been better put to use on Saint Patrick's Day. Still, I'm sure they're cute enough for kids to love.

Of course, the chocolate icing is already sprinkled with green sugar that would’ve been better put to use on Saint Patrick’s Day. Still, I’m sure they’re cute enough for kids to love.

Be Mine with These Valentine’s Day Treats

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Food wise, Valentine’s Day has it’s own share of goodies but usually pertains to stuff that you’d basically make for your kids during their school V-Day party event. Of course, while there may be parties, they aren’t nearly as extravagant as what you’d see on Christmas, Halloween, or the Super Bowl even. I mean, I’ve basically found no Valentine’s Day vegetable dip tray, ever. Yet, since I’ve done previous articles on treats from almost every single big holiday since Halloween, I should probably do one. After all, even if you don’t have a sweetheart this V-Day, it’s a very big holiday for treats, especially if you’re in elementary school or have child in one, especially since kids are basically obligated to bring valentines as well as treats to the whole class. And it’s usually up to the parents’ creative juices or bank account to make that possible. Not to mention, children will have to do Valentine’s Day craft projects in art class. Nevertheless, whether you’re a parent or a repressed art or culinary person, I have some treats for you that might be up your alley. So without further adieu, here are some sweet V-Day treats you might want to make for the ones you love. Still, this article might taste like diabetes since most of them are sugary sweet and may make you gag on sight of sentimentality.

1. These arrow cupcakes will basically melt your heart.

Of course, the arrows aren't edible since they're made with straws and paper. Still, they're adorable if you ask me.

Of course, the arrows aren’t edible since they’re made with straws and paper. Still, they’re adorable if you ask me.

2. Nothing says Valentine’s Day like X’s and O’s sugar and sprinkle cookies.

Not only do these cookies represent hugs and kisses in the days before internet emoticons but they're also great for a cookie version of Tic-Tac-Toe.

Not only do these cookies represent hugs and kisses in the days before internet emoticons but they’re also great for a cookie version of Tic-Tac-Toe.

3. Sweeten up your Valentine’s Day with these lovebird cookies.

Of course, as you know being winter a lot of them roost down south. Still, it seems that one of them hasn't been paired off yet. Maybe he's lonely. Or she. I can't tell with these birds.

Of course, as you know being winter a lot of them roost down south. Still, it seems that one of them hasn’t been paired off yet. Maybe he’s lonely. Or she. I can’t tell with these birds.

4. Why stop making Valentine’s Day treats for your kids, when you can make some for your dog?

Yes, these are Valentine's Day dog treats and it's the first time I showed anything for pets on my treats post. Still, I'm not sure whether covering dog treats in icing is actually good for the dog. Seriously, I'd consult a vet about that.

Yes, these are Valentine’s Day dog treats and it’s the first time I showed anything for pets on my treats post. Still, I’m not sure whether covering dog treats in icing is actually good for the dog. Seriously, I’d consult a vet about that.

5. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than a bouquet of watermelon and grapes.

Seriously, who eats watermelon in the middle of winter? It's a summer food for God's sake. Also, this might be made from Edible Arrangements.

Seriously, who eats watermelon in the middle of winter? It’s a summer food for God’s sake. Also, this might be made from Edible Arrangements.

6. Show your loved one you care with this heart shaped fruit salad.

Now this contains, blueberries, strawberries, kiwis, and raspberries. Basically fruits you'd consider out of season by this time of year and probably grown in California.

Now this contains, blueberries, strawberries, kiwis, and raspberries. Basically fruits you’d consider out of season by this time of year and probably grown in California.

7. At your Valentine’s Day party, you can’t go wrong with these hotdog and cheese toothpick favors.

However, I'm not sure that the meat is even cooked or whether it's safe to eat. Then again, it probably wouldn't look right if it was.

However, I’m not sure that the meat is even cooked or whether it’s safe to eat. Then again, it probably wouldn’t look right if it was.

8. For your kids’ Valentine’s Day events at school, I’m sure you can’t go wrong with these lovely owl brownies.

Of course,  some of these owls wink while others have purplish eyes. Then again, these could just be birds for all I know. Still, adorable.

Of course, some of these owls wink while others have purplish eyes. Then again, these could just be birds for all I know. Still, adorable.

9. Show your love this Valentine’s Day by giving  your sweetheart a bouquet of cupcake roses.

Of course, the best thing about these is that they're chocolate, which means this guy probably knows my own heart (just kidding).

Of course, the best thing about these is that they’re chocolate, which means this guy probably knows my own heart (just kidding).

10. Sweeten this Valentine’s Day by carving a heart right into these apples.

Of course, this idea not only features healthy food but also is very simple to do as long as you can draw hearts right.

Of course, this idea not only features healthy food but also is very simple to do as long as you can draw hearts right.

11. Now these hearty bear cookies are simply unbearable.

I like how all the hearts are around the creamy part of the cookie sandwiches. Seriously, these cookies are just so adorable.

I like how all the hearts are around the creamy part of the cookie sandwiches. Seriously, these cookies are just so adorable.

12. These Valentine’s Day penguin cookies may come from the cold but they’ll melt your heart.

I'm familiar with penguins for Christmas but penguins for Valentine's Day is a new one to me. Still, they're very cute and tend to be made from Oreos.

I’m familiar with penguins for Christmas but penguins for Valentine’s Day is a new one to me. Still, they’re very cute and tend to be made from Oreos.

13. Now these cookies show you and your loved one belong together like peanut butter and jelly.

Of course, this would be great for Jiff and Schmucker's new ad campaigns. Not to mention, they seem to resemble more like pop tarts than pieces of bread.

Of course, this would be great for Jiff and Schmucker’s new ad campaigns. Not to mention, they seem to resemble more like pop tarts than pieces of bread.

14. Stomach these butterfly pretzels this Valentine’s Day.

Eat these and you'll literally have butterflies in your stomach as far as I could see. Nevertheless, they seem too adorable to resist, especially in pink.

Eat these and you’ll literally have butterflies in your stomach as far as I could see. Nevertheless, they seem too adorable to resist, especially in pink.

15. Warm up somebody’s heart this Valentine’s Day with these heart shaped calzone.

Of course, these would be nice to make on a cold winter day, especially in the middle of a snow storm. Still, might go well with the football calzones in my last treat post on Super Bowl Sunday.

Of course, these would be nice to make on a cold winter day, especially in the middle of a snow storm. Still, might go well with the football calzones in my last treat post on Super Bowl Sunday.

16. If you can’t say it out loud, perhaps say it with cupcakes.

Then again, maybe it's should just be for your whole class if you're the teacher. It might sound stalkerish if all these cupcakes are for just one person.

Then again, maybe it’s should just be for your whole class if you’re the teacher. It might sound stalkerish if all these cupcakes are for just one person.

17. These heart shaped candy cupcakes are just as sweet as can be.

Of course, the hearts themselves are the kind of processed Little Debbie cakes you probably find at the grocery store. Yet, at least they're better than the real ones, which are from Necco.

Of course, the hearts themselves are the kind of processed Little Debbie cakes you probably find at the grocery store. Yet, at least they’re better than the real ones, which are from Necco.

18. Nothing is better for Valentine’s Day than these marshmallow love bugs on a stick.

Of course, some of these bugs are so hungry for love that they have hearts in their eyes. Still, very adorable as you can see.

Of course, some of these bugs are so hungry for love that they have hearts in their eyes. Still, very adorable as you can see.

19. Use the heart shaped candies to decorate your chocolate cake pops.

Then again, maybe the cake pops would taste better without the heart candies. I mean those things taste like a combination of sugar, chalk, and cough syrup.

Then again, maybe the cake pops would taste better without the heart candies. I mean those things taste like a combination of sugar, chalk, and cough syrup.

20. Wake up this Valentine’s Day with a heart egg on toast.

Or as the English call it, "Toad in a Hole" or "Egg in a Basket." Still, I'm sure someone would love this even if a child doesn't.

Or as the English call it, “Toad in a Hole” or “Egg in a Basket.” Still, I’m sure someone would love this even if a child doesn’t.

21. Wish your friends luck with these red fruit roll up fortune cookies this Valentine’s Day.

Of course, I wonder what's written on those pieces of paper. And I wonder if anyone would get the wrong idea.

Of course, I wonder what’s written on those pieces of paper. And I wonder if anyone would get the wrong idea. Still, the fruit roll up use is pretty clever.

22. Send your love to your friends this Valentine’s Day with these messaged heart cupcakes.

I hope the ones that receive the "I Love U" cakes don't get the wrong idea. Because that could lead to certain complications.

I hope the ones that receive the “I Love U” cakes don’t get the wrong idea. Because that could lead to certain complications.

23. Of course, this bird house love shack is place where birds can get together.

Sure gingerbread houses are mostly associated with Christmas. Yet, this one's a Valentine's Day one. Oh, and this one even has a little mailbox. Still, it's probably not for eating.

Sure gingerbread houses are mostly associated with Christmas. Yet, this one’s a Valentine’s Day one. Oh, and this one even has a little mailbox. Still, it’s probably not for eating.

24. To honor Saint Valentine’s Italian heritage (if he ever existed) here are some heart pizzas to love.

Notice that all these pizzas have red hearts on them whether they be pepperoni, pepper, or tomato. Nevertheless, there are a lot of variations here.

Notice that all these pizzas have red hearts on them whether they be pepperoni, pepper, or tomato. Nevertheless, there are a lot of variations here.

25. Give your loved ones these Teddy Bear cake pops to treasure.

Of course, where would we be without teddy bears on Valentine's Day (or chocolate for that matter)? Still, these bears look so good enough to eat.

Of course, where would we be without teddy bears on Valentine’s Day (or chocolate for that matter)? Still, these bears look so good enough to eat.

26. All these ladybugs need is someone to love.

Yes, these lady bug cookies with candy on them are adorable. Also, it's possible that some of these can be guys despite the name.

Yes, these lady bug cookies with candy on them are adorable. Also, it’s possible that some of these can be guys despite the name.

27. Nothing says Valentine’s Day like a nice V-Day cake of a heart with roses on it.

I don't know about you but I think the strawberry syrup covering this cake kind of reminds me of fake blood you'd see on Halloween treats.

I don’t know about you but I think the strawberry syrup covering this cake kind of reminds me of fake blood you’d see on Halloween treats.

28. Of course, what’s Valentine’s Day without some strawberry tart hearts?

Of course, unlike Monty Python's "Dead Bishop on the Landing" sketch, these tarts don't have any rat in them. However, the Queen of Hearts should watch out for the knave. Or the Knave should know better than to steal them, especially if he's in Lewis Carroll's Wonderland.

Of course, unlike Monty Python’s “Dead Bishop on the Landing” sketch, these tarts don’t have any rat in them. However, the Queen of Hearts should watch out for the knave. Or the Knave should know better than to steal them, especially if he’s in Lewis Carroll’s Wonderland.

29. If you like Japanese food, try these heart sushi out for size.

Sure this sushi has carrots instead of raw fish. Yet, contrary to the common misconception, raw fish is actually optional for sushi. In fact, you can make sushi with just about anything as long as you wrap it in rice and seaweed.

Sure this sushi has carrots instead of raw fish. Yet, contrary to the common misconception, raw fish is actually optional for sushi. In fact, you can make sushi with just about anything as long as you wrap it in rice and seaweed.

30. Of course, you can’t go wrong with a heart fruit salad on Valentine’s Day.

Of course, this salad consists of cherries blueberries and strawberries all of which are out of season in February. Still, quite colorful to say the least.

Of course, this salad consists of cherries blueberries and strawberries all of which are out of season in February. Still, quite colorful to say the least.

31. Need something to do with your Christmas candy canes? So why don’t you make candy hearts on a stick with them for Valentine’s Day?

Of course, I'm sure that your Christmas candy canes might obviously be stale by then anyway. So maybe it's better to keep them in the wrappers.

Of course, I’m sure that your Christmas candy canes might obviously be stale by then anyway. So maybe it’s better to keep them in the wrappers.

32. Of course, you can’t have Valentine’s Day without a heart salad?

Of course, you have to remove the toothpicks before eating the carrots and tomatoes (which might not have any). Nevertheless, this is adorable.

Of course, you have to remove the toothpicks before eating the carrots and tomatoes (which might not have any). Nevertheless, this is adorable.

33. Make Valentine’s Day special with these candy heart cookies.

Of course, these sugar cookies probably taste much better than the real candy hearts which I say are basically disgusting. Seriously who thought those candy hearts were a great idea?

Of course, these sugar cookies probably taste much better than the real candy hearts which I say are basically disgusting. Seriously who thought those candy hearts were a great idea?

34. Nothing says Valentine’s Day like red velvet cheesecake hearts.

I like how these heart cheese cakes have strings coming from them as if they're a bunch of balloons. Now that's quite clever.

I like how these heart cheese cakes have strings coming from them as if they’re a bunch of balloons. Now that’s quite clever.

35. Of course, you can’t have Valentine’s Day without a triple decker Rice Krispie treat heart cake.

Yes, you can be sure that you'll see a Rice Krispie dessert on this post.  It's amazing the kinds of culinary creations you can do with them. Still, this is quite adorable.

Yes, you can be sure that you’ll see a Rice Krispie dessert on this post. It’s amazing the kinds of culinary creations you can do with them. Still, this is quite adorable.

36. Sweeten up Valentine’s Day with these heart fruit kabobs.

Of course, these consist of watermelon, cantaloupe, and a melon, I think. Nevertheless, it's cute how these kebobs are meant to look like arrows.

Of course, these consist of watermelon, cantaloupe, and a melon, I think. Nevertheless, it’s cute how these kebobs are meant to look like arrows.

37. These lip cookies are certainly worth kissing for.

I wonder if they managed to find a lip cookie cutter at some kind of sex shop or something. Well, I've never seen such cookie cutters in any other store like that. Seriously, I haven't.

I wonder if they managed to find a lip cookie cutter at some kind of sex shop or something. Well, I’ve never seen such cookie cutters in any other store like that. Seriously, I haven’t.

38. Show love for your kid this Valentine’s Day with a V-Day lunch set.

Seems like this consists of 3 heart sandwiches, 3 cracker piles, a strawberry, and a couple other things. Still, it kind of seems like a bit much for child's lunch box.

Seems like this consists of 3 heart sandwiches, 3 cracker piles, a strawberry, and a couple other things. Still, it kind of seems like a bit much for child’s lunch box.

39. You can never keep too many hearts in a cookie jar of love.

Of course, I can say this since this jar is an actual cookie. Yet, I'm sure the string on the lid isn't edible. Well, if the hearts aren't candy.

Of course, I can say this since this jar is an actual cookie. Yet, I’m sure the string on the lid isn’t edible. Well, if the hearts aren’t candy.

40. Treat your valentine with these heart lattice cookies topped with gum drops.

Of course, I'd rather just pluck off the gum drops and eat the cookies. Seriously, gum drops are disgusting. Still, I have no idea how they manage to do the lattice bit.

Of course, I’d rather just pluck off the gum drops and eat the cookies. Seriously, gum drops are disgusting. Still, I have no idea how they manage to do the lattice bit.

41. Now these cupcakes are full of X’s, O’s and hearts.

Whatever's on these cookies seem too alike to be cherries or anything grown in a garden. So they must be candies. Also, it seems that the heart team won at Tic-Tac-Toe.

Whatever’s on these cookies seem too alike to be cherries or anything grown in a garden. So they must be candies. Also, it seems that the heart team won at Tic-Tac-Toe.

42. Give your valentine a special treat with these chocolate cake pop hearts.

Now I bet you these were dipped in chocolate before being covered with sprinkles and/or heart decorations. Some more than others.

Now I bet you these were dipped in chocolate before being covered with sprinkles and/or heart decorations. Some more than others.

43. Of course, these Rice Krispie treats will go straight to your heart.

Like the cupcakes above the arrows are made of paper and straws. Yet, these are also covered in icing and pink drizzle.

Like the cupcakes above the arrows are made of paper and straws. Yet, these are also covered in icing and pink drizzle.

44. Wish your loved ones good luck with these fortune cookies.

Now these aren't real fortune cookies as you see with one of them broken in half. They're actually sugar cookies covered in icing and sprinkles.

Now these aren’t real fortune cookies as you see with one of them broken in half. They’re actually sugar cookies covered in icing and sprinkles.

45. Now with these cookies, nothing can be any sweeter.

Now while most of these are hearts, some of them are quite creative. For instance, there's a cupcake, flower, dove, a thought cloud and 2 hearts together.

Now while most of these are hearts, some of them are quite creative. For instance, there’s a cupcake, flower, dove, a thought cloud and 2 hearts together.

46. These 3 little monsters just need a little bit of love.

Now these are just simply adorable yet I wonder what's underneath their thick layers of icing meant to resemble fur. Probably cake.

Now these are just simply adorable yet I wonder what’s underneath their thick layers of icing meant to resemble fur. Probably cake.

47. These lego candy figures must have their hearts beating.

Now these are just so creative. Whoever had the idea of using Lego figures for Valentine's Day must be some sort of genius or wizard.

Now these are just so creative. Whoever had the idea of using Lego figures for Valentine’s Day must be some sort of genius or wizard.

48. These pretzel and gum drop arrows would go straight to your heart.

I'd just eat the pretzels and leave out the gum drops. Seriously, gum drops are disgusting candies. Yet, really cute to say the least.

I’d just eat the pretzels and leave out the gum drops. Seriously, gum drops are disgusting candies. Yet, really cute to say the least.

49. Nothing makes a great Valentine’s Day dinner like a heart pizza.

Now I like how they have heart pepperoni on this pizza. Yet, what's with the olives? Seriously, why?

Now I like how they have heart pepperoni on this pizza. Yet, what’s with the olives? Seriously, why? Not to mention, the yellow and white cheese.

50. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than a heart peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Now this is a nice idea for kids on V-Day. Yet, I'm not sure that leaving the jelly uncovered is a good idea, especially if you put it in a little plastic bag.

Now this is a nice idea for kids on V-Day. Yet, I’m not sure that leaving the jelly uncovered is a good idea, especially if you put it in a little plastic bag.

51. These Valentine cheese, pepperoni, and crackers would make perfect party appetizer.

I like how they're used on the butterfly crackers. Also like how they have XOX in cheese and the heart shaped cheese and pepperoni.

I like how they’re used on the butterfly crackers. Also like how they have XOX in cheese and the heart shaped cheese and pepperoni.

52. Now these heart gobs are simply to die for.

Let's just hope the pink bit isn't strawberry flavored. I mean it's said that strawberry and chocolate don't taste good together.

Let’s just hope the pink bit isn’t strawberry flavored. I mean it’s said that strawberry and chocolate don’t taste good together.

53. Now these heart pizzas will certainly make your valentine smile.

Of course, these are among things made for kids. Still, I think these pizzas are so cute, especially with the olive eyes.

Of course, these are among things made for kids. Still, I think these pizzas are so cute, especially with the olive eyes.

54. These Rice Krispie heart pops are simply lovely.

Of course these are covered in icing and sprinkles. Yet, these are so cute though they may contain a lot of sugar.

Of course these are covered in icing and sprinkles. Yet, these are so cute though they may contain a lot of sugar.

55. If you can’t say it with flowers, say it with these tomato tulips.

Now these tomatoes are cut, stuffed with cream cheese, and have long onions as stems. Still, a pretty clever idea if you think about. Sure won't have these delivered to you from Edible Arrangements.

Now these tomatoes are cut, stuffed with cream cheese, and have long onions as stems. Still, a pretty clever idea if you think about. Sure won’t have these delivered to you from Edible Arrangements.

56. Treat your dog this Valentine’s Day with this iced treat bone.

I don't know whether it's a V-Day dog treat or a human treat emphasizing puppy love. Still, people can be quite weird with their pets sometimes they can see them too much as children.

I don’t know whether it’s a V-Day dog treat or a human treat emphasizing puppy love. Still, people can be quite weird with their pets sometimes they can see them too much as children.

57. Wake up your valentine with these heart cinnamon rolls.

Okay, this is very irresistible stuff as well as addicting. Nevertheless, it's nice how they made these rolls into hearts and fit time in a dish.

Okay, this is very irresistible stuff as well as addicting. Nevertheless, it’s nice how they made these rolls into hearts and fit time in a dish.

58. Show your love this Valentine’s Day with these watermelon hearts.

Of course, they have watermelon hearts and orange arrow ends as well as connected by toothpicks. Still, these are so clever and healthier than some of the arrow hearts.

Of course, they have watermelon hearts and orange arrow ends as well as connected by toothpicks. Still, these are so clever and healthier than some of the arrow hearts.

59. Cool down this Valentine’s Day with this heart ice cream sandwich.

Let's hope that's not strawberry ice cream filling because combining it with chocolate tastes disgusting. Also, I hope the lights don't make it melt.

Let’s hope that’s not strawberry ice cream filling because combining it with chocolate tastes disgusting. Also, I hope the lights don’t make it melt.

60. Show your sweetheart you’re hot stuff with some hearty potato chips and salsa dip.

Of course, chips and salsa might be more appropriate for a different occasion. Say, Super Bowl Sunday.

Of course, chips and salsa might be more appropriate for a different occasion. Say, Super Bowl Sunday.

61. Have your valentine wake up to the smell of these heart doughnuts in the morning.

Of course, this would be a great valentine for your neighborhood police officer walking the beat, stereotypically speaking.

Of course, this would be a great valentine for your neighborhood police officer walking the beat, stereotypically speaking.

62. Now this is a great part of a complete Valentine’s Day breakfast.

Of course, there's heart fruit salad and heart pancakes with a heart pin through them. Not to mention, sprinkle sauce to top them. Still, seems made for a kid.

Of course, there’s heart fruit salad and heart pancakes with a heart pin through them. Not to mention, sprinkle sauce to top them. Still, seems made for a kid.

63. Make Valentine’s Day a sweet occasion with these love bug cupcakes.

Sure these are full of sugar and may cause diabetes. Yet, they're just so adorable your kids will love them.

Sure these are full of sugar and may cause diabetes. Yet, they’re just so adorable your kids will love them.

64. Treat your valentine to these lovely striped chocolate hearts.

I don't know about you but these are probably cakes underneath the icing. Still, since they're chocolate, I'll certainly eat them.

I don’t know about you but these are probably cakes underneath the icing. Still, since they’re chocolate, I’ll certainly eat them.

65. Make Valentine’s Day special with this large strawberry heart cake.

Methinks, this was professionally done in some sort of bakery. Seriously, I can't see how even a housewife can have that much time on their hands.

Methinks, this was professionally done in some sort of bakery. Seriously, I can’t see how even a housewife can have that much time on their hands.

66. Show your love with these fruit tart heart cookies this special Valentine’s Day.

Now these may look tasty to some. Yet, to many fruit cookies are just disgusting. Then again, the filling is probably just jelly.

Now these may look tasty to some. Yet, to many fruit cookies are just disgusting. Then again, the filling is probably just jelly.

67. Make a nice Valentine’s Day snack with these potato heart cookies.

Now these might be more appropriate for Super Bowl Sunday than Valentine's Day. In fact, they might be more appropriate for Saint Patrick's Day since they're made from potato.

Now these might be more appropriate for Super Bowl Sunday than Valentine’s Day. In fact, they might be more appropriate for Saint Patrick’s Day since they’re made from potato.

68. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than a bouquet of chocolate covered cookies or something.

Of course, like the heart pops, these were covered and chocolate and decorated with sprinkles. Yet, some are more intricate than others.

Of course, like the heart pops, these were covered and chocolate and decorated with sprinkles. Yet, some are more intricate than others.

69. Treat your valentine than toast with a heart made of strawberry jelly, I think.

Now I think this makes up for a sweet breakfast don't you think? Better than a heart Toad in a Hole, in my view.

Now I think this makes up for a sweet breakfast don’t you think? Better than a heart Toad in a Hole, in my view.

70. Nothing is sweeter for Valentine’s Day than these Oreo mini cake sandwiches.

Of course, these have not just Oreo cake, but icing and sprinkles, too. Still, these are adorable and look good enough to eat.

Of course, these have not just Oreo cake, but icing and sprinkles, too. Still, these are adorable and look good enough to eat.

71. For your Valentine’s Day appetizers, you can’t do wrong with heart shrimp.

Of course, this is probably for a restaurant as it seems like. Still, I know some people might find this arrangement tasty.

Of course, this is probably for a restaurant as it seems like. Still, I know some people might find this arrangement tasty.

72. For your Valentine’s Day lunch, you might want to go with these heart sandwiches.

Of course, I'm not sure if those are regular sandwiches or BLTs. Then again, it's okay to look under them, is it?

Of course, I’m not sure if those are regular sandwiches or BLTs. Then again, it’s okay to look under them, is it?

73. Nothing makes a Valentine’s Day dinner memorable than having heart burgers and heart potato chips.

Of course, these might be bad for your heart if you aren't too careful. Don't say I didn't warn you about that.

Of course, these might be bad for your heart if you aren’t too careful. Don’t say I didn’t warn you about that.

74. Have your sweetheart wake up to these heart waffles this Valentine’s Day.

Of course, it's a more nutritious meal if you just add the blueberries. Still, I think these might be store bought.

Of course, it’s a more nutritious meal if you just add the blueberries. Still, I think these might be store bought.

75. Start your sweetheart’s day with these heart nutella and strawberry pop tarts.

Of course, these pop tarts are much better for you than those you buy at a store. Nevertheless, these are adorable.

Of course, these pop tarts are much better for you than those you buy at a store. Nevertheless, these are adorable.

76. Now nothing makes Valentine’s Day quite romantic than having such heart sandwiches as these.

Of course, these are caviar sandwiches as you can see with the dress one. Nevertheless, they may be too expensive to make and I wouldn't recommend it.

Of course, these are caviar sandwiches as you can see with the dress one. Nevertheless, they may be too expensive to make and I wouldn’t recommend it.

77. Show your love to your children with these pink love train cookies.

Now these sweet candy/cookie trains are adorable and would make wonderful treats for a child's school V-Day bash. Man, what you can do with pink cookies and life savers.

Now these sweet candy/cookie trains are adorable and would make wonderful treats for a child’s school V-Day bash. Man, what you can do with pink cookies and life savers.

78. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than a fruit tray of grapes and chocolate covered strawberries in a heart.

Of course, you can dip the strawberries in the chocolate fondue fountain. The grapes, not so much.

Of course, you can dip the strawberries in the chocolate fondue fountain. The grapes, not so much.

79. Of course, you can’t have Valentine’s Day without some heart candy corn.

I know that this candy is probably home made. Yet, since it's a controversial candy for Halloween, I wouldn't risk making candy corn for Valentine's Day.

I know that this candy is probably home made. Yet, since it’s a controversial candy for Halloween, I wouldn’t risk making candy corn for Valentine’s Day.

80. Treat your sweetheart to these Valentine’s Day jello hearts.

Of course, these are just jello squares with hearts in them. Yet, don't ask me how someone can pull that off because I don't really have jello that much anymore.

Of course, these are just jello squares with hearts in them. Yet, don’t ask me how someone can pull that off because I don’t really have jello that much anymore.

Happy Valentine’s Day with These Vintage Ads of Yesterday

San-Valentino-per-coca-cola-1960

To be honest, I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. Maybe it’s because it’s a holiday centered around romance while I haven’t experienced much of it since most of the guys I had things for didn’t like me back or just have a funny way of showing it that I didn’t quite get which sometimes sent me to suspect the worst (you know who you are). Then again, contrary to what 30 Rock says Saint Valentine’s Day isn’t a Catholic holy day since we’re not sure whether the martyred bishop of love was a real person (not to mention that most Catholic Masses don’t last beyond 45 minutes). Still, with the exception of getting chocolate candy from my parents and flowers, I can basically take or leave it. Still, since sweethearts tend to exchange gifts such as jewelry, flowers, candy, lingerie, or stuffed animals. So there are plenty of opportunities for businesses to advertise their products. Now I can go crazy about the cute vintage Valentine’s ads like the couple sharing the Coke one above. Yet, I realized that would be more taste like diabetes and vomit inducing than the sweetness Valentine’s Day is associated with. Instead, I’ll show ads that don’t make Valentine’s Day such a lovely mid winter holiday for the greatest gift businesses can receive: cold hard cash. So without further adieu, here are some terrible Valentine’s Day ads from your grandparents’ generation.

1. This Valentine’s Day, fellas, give your girlfriend the gift you’ll need to transport with your pick up truck that’ll break your bank.

Of course, this is Shirley Temple as a teenager who could probably afford to get her own hope chest. Seriously, Valentine's Day isn't the kind of holiday to buy your loved ones furniture. Not to mention, these pieces of storage used to house an unmarried woman's dowry during the Middle Ages. Save that kind of present for Christmas.

Of course, this is Shirley Temple as a teenager who could probably afford to get her own hope chest. Seriously, Valentine’s Day isn’t the kind of holiday to buy your loved ones furniture. Not to mention, these pieces of storage used to house an unmarried woman’s dowry during the Middle Ages. Save that kind of present for Christmas or her birthday.

2. Ladies, nothing says Valentine’s Day for your gentleman like a new silk necktie.

Now this is the kind of guy's gift that says: "I didn't know what else to give you. But I know you're a guy and needed to give you something. So here's what I got you for $60."

Now this is the kind of guy’s gift that says: “I didn’t know what else to give you. But I know you’re a guy and needed to give you something. So here’s what I got you for $60.”

3. This Valentine’s Day cake gives you a way to get in a man’s heart through his stomach.

Sure she may feel a kiss coming on. But her facial expression makes me think whether she's anticipating for the poison to take effect.

Sure she may feel a kiss coming on. But her facial expression makes me think whether she’s anticipating for the poison to take effect any minute now.

4. Nothing says Valentine’s Day than Rheingold Extra Dry Beer.

Now I'm sure that beer is an appropriate Valentine's Day Gift for a guy. Well, better than neck ties. Still, that woman looks a bit wasted in her evening clothes. And I'm not sure the dog is paying attention to her. Besides, booze also has a tendency to make a romantic candlelight dinner into something you might not want to discuss with the kids.

Now I’m sure that beer is an appropriate Valentine’s Day Gift for a guy. Well, better than neck ties. Still, that woman looks a bit wasted in her evening clothes. And I’m not sure the dog is paying attention to her. Besides, booze also has a tendency to make a romantic candlelight dinner into something you might not want to discuss with the kids.

5. Give your loved one a gift they’d be grateful to have this Valentine’s Day, a pre-mortem funeral arrangements.

Man, this funeral is really hurting for customers. Still, this is a pretty insulting ad for men who probably have more an idea of how to arrange their wives' funerals than knowing what to get them for Valentine's Day. And when it comes to Valentine's Day guys have it easy since it's a girly holiday to begin with.

Man, this funeral is really hurting for customers. Still, this is a pretty insulting ad for men who probably have more an idea of how to arrange their wives’ funerals than knowing what to get them for Valentine’s Day. And when it comes to Valentine’s Day guys have it easy since it’s a girly holiday to begin with.

6. Give your sweetheart Hinds Honey and  Almond Cream for this Valentine’s Day as these girls make a lacy Valentine’s Day card for their mother it seems.

That girl looks as if the woman in the valentine is her next kill target and she more like a bitter almond than as sweet as honey. Seriously, she seems utterly terrifying and wants to knock of the woman for her jewelry and clothes.

That girl looks as if the woman in the valentine is her next kill target and she more like a bitter almond than as sweet as honey. Seriously, she seems utterly terrifying and wants to knock of the woman for her jewelry and clothes.

7. Schrafft’s Chocolates are the candies that lead to a girl’s, uh, I’d like to say heart.

From how the guy's hands are position, it seems like he's about to put his hands on her ass as he sets them any lower. Seems like they're about to get their nasty on to me.

From how the guy’s hands are position, it seems like he’s about to put his hands on her ass as he sets them any lower. Seems like they’re about to get their nasty on to me.

8. Give your sweetheart the Valentine’s Day gift they’ll appreciate, tires.

Uh, aren't these kids a little young to be in love? Also, I'm sure they aren't anywhere near the legal driving age in most states. I'm sure the designers were so concentrated on the cuteness.

Uh, aren’t these kids a little young to be in love? Also, I’m sure they aren’t anywhere near the legal driving age in most states. I’m sure the designers were so concentrated on the cuteness. Still, I’d be a bit concerned if I were their parents.

9. Send a valentine to those you love with a card from American Greetings.

I don't know about you but while the cards are nice, the cartoon cherub in the corner just scares me for some reason. Seriously, he doesn't make me want to buy any of these cards, even the one with the cat.

I don’t know about you but while the cards are nice, the cartoon cherub in the corner just scares me for some reason. Seriously, he doesn’t make me want to buy any of these cards, even the one with the cat.

10. Guys, when it comes to being the perfect valentine, make sure you’re the Kreml guy on the lower right.

From PopSugar: "The description for "Slicker" seems like it was pulled straight from Sue Sylvester's Will burn-book: 'Your dome's so slick we don't know whether that's human hair or patent leather.'" Also, Curly is bald and resembles a guy you'd see from The Sopranos while the Kreml guy seems like he's a creepy stalker of some woman's nightmare. Not to mention, Fuzzy seems like he's put on too much hair spray before going to bed.

From PopSugar: “The description for “Slicker” seems like it was pulled straight from Sue Sylvester’s Will burn-book: ‘Your dome’s so slick we don’t know whether that’s human hair or patent leather.'” Also, Curly is bald and resembles a guy you’d see from The Sopranos while the Kreml guy seems like he’s a creepy stalker of some woman’s nightmare. Not to mention, Fuzzy seems like he’s put on too much hair spray before going to bed.

11. Give her a valentine that would put  stars in her eyes and music in her heart.

Excuse me, does she have stars in her eyes? Or is she really a lifeless fem-bot from the Stepford suburban community? You know the one that killed all those housewives and replaced them with look alike robots who'd do anything to please their husbands? Freaky.

Excuse me, does she have stars in her eyes? Or is she really a lifeless fem-bot from the Stepford suburban community? You know the one that killed all those housewives and replaced them with look alike robots who’d do anything to please their husbands? Freaky.

12. Oh, he remembered Valentine’s Day! And he sent me Whtiman’s chocolate.

Of course, we should all remember just because Elizabeth Taylor's man remembered Valentine's Day, doesn't really guarantee she's going to stay with him. I mean she's known for marrying 8 times to 7 different men. Those 7 divorces aren't cheap, man.

Of course, we should all remember just because Elizabeth Taylor’s man remembered Valentine’s Day, doesn’t really guarantee she’s going to stay with him. I mean she’s known for marrying 8 times to 7 different men (twice to Richard Burton and one to a guy she met in rehab in the 1990s). Those 7 divorces don’t come cheap.

13. For those in long distance relationships, send them a Valentine’s Day telegram from Western Union.

From PopSugar: "Ending a Valentine's Day telegram with "guess who" sounds a teensy bit stalkerish." Yeah, I'd think this girl might want to file a restraining order if she receives enough of them.

From PopSugar: “Ending a Valentine’s Day telegram with “guess who” sounds a teensy bit stalkerish.” Yeah, I’d think this girl might want to file a restraining order if she receives enough of them.

14. You’re never too young to give or receive Faroh’s finest chocolates!

Okay, now babies in love is just pushing it. Seriously, what were these designers thinking? This isn't cute, it's disturbing. Babies are known for crying, slobbering, and pooping in diapers, not giving each other chocolates! Seriously, why?

Okay, now babies in love is just pushing it. Seriously, what were these designers thinking? This isn’t cute, it’s disturbing. Babies are known for crying, slobbering, and pooping in diapers, not giving each other chocolates! Seriously, why?

15. Aim for the best with Chesterfield cigarettes.

Sure Chesterfields may lead to your sweetheart's heart. But they'll make their lungs all filled with tar and cancerous tumors as well as turn their skin yellow and increase their chances for cardiovascular disease. Also, tobacco kills about a third of its users every year.

Sure Chesterfields may lead to your sweetheart’s heart. But they’ll make their lungs all filled with tar and cancerous tumors as well as turn their skin yellow and increase their chances for cardiovascular disease. Also, tobacco kills about a third of its users every year.

16. Rheingold Extra Dry Beer: The perfect gift for your man this Valentine’s Day.

"Drink up, honey buns, for I've prepared these 3 drinks just for you this special day. Oh, and did I mention, I don't feel like driving tonight? Don't forget, that you can't be seen with a blood-alcohol level of over .08 in most states."

“Drink up, honey buns, for I’ve prepared these 3 drinks just for you this special day. Oh, and did I mention, I don’t feel like driving tonight? Don’t forget, that you can’t be seen with a blood-alcohol level of over .08 in most states, sweetie.”

17. For your son this Valentine’s Day, why don’t you pack him a sandwich for school with Mor: a thrifty meat.

Of course, Mary loves Jimmy and she's very concerned for his well being and his meat sandwich fantasies. I mean we all know that eating processed salted meat isn't good for the cholesterol in the least. Also, it's disgusting.

Of course, Mary loves Jimmy and she’s very concerned for his well being and his meat sandwich fantasies. I mean we all know that eating processed salted meat isn’t good for the cholesterol in the least. Also, it’s disgusting.

18. Please your valentine with these Manhattani peppermint pajamas.

From Popsugar: "My best guess for this one would have to be: wear comfy PJs on Valentine's Day because after all that chocolate you're gonna want something loose." Also, the man kind of remind me of Mr. Bean for some reason and he seems a bit self-conscious about his weight.

From Popsugar: “My best guess for this one would have to be: wear comfy PJs on Valentine’s Day because after all that chocolate you’re gonna want something loose.” Also, the man kind of remind me of Mr. Bean for some reason and he seems a bit self-conscious about his weight.

19. Nothing says sex and romance on Valentine’s Day like V-Day pajamas for the whole family!

Now giving your significant other lame Valentine's Day PJs are one thing. But giving them for the whole family, who the fuck had that crazy idea? I'm sure young Billy would really appreciate getting printed hearts on his PJs for Valentine's Day. Of course, he'll probably never wear them again after this picture.

Now giving your significant other lame Valentine’s Day PJs are one thing. But giving them for the whole family, who the fuck had that crazy idea? I’m sure young Billy would really appreciate getting printed hearts on his PJs for Valentine’s Day. Of course, he’ll probably never wear them again after this picture.

20. Give her the gift of chocolate with Whitman’s candy sampler.

Is it just me or is that a really creepy horror version of Katharine Hepburn eating some chocolate? Of course, she takes a chocolate in her mouth every time before going on her daily homicidal rampage.

Is it just me or is that a really creepy horror version of Katharine Hepburn eating some chocolate? Of course, she takes a chocolate in her mouth every time before going on her daily homicidal rampage.

21. Heads, you win! Seriously, what does that mean?

Oh, I see. Guys, I don't think these ladies want chocolates. Rather I think they actually want your head on a platter. Seriously, their soulless eyes know nothing but the sweet taste of man flesh these lady night terrors crave.

Oh, I see. Guys, I don’t think these ladies want chocolates. Rather I think they actually want your head on a platter. Seriously, their soulless eyes know nothing but the sweet taste of man flesh these lady night terrors crave. Yes, they’re literally man eaters and watch out, boys, they’ll chew you up.

22. Nothing satisfies a man this Valentine’s Day than a shirt and tie from Arrow.

Now I know that men are very hard to buy for on Valentine's Day since is a girly holiday. Still, I'm sure a dress shirt and necktie aren't gifts men really want to see from their ladies. Seriously, you're better off getting him a team jersey or Grand Theft Auto.

Now I know that men are very hard to buy for on Valentine’s Day since is a girly holiday. Still, I’m sure a dress shirt and necktie aren’t gifts men really want to see from their ladies. Seriously, you’re better off getting him a team jersey or Grand Theft Auto.

23. Now what to give a woman? Vacuums or flowers?

Seriously, give her flowers, boys. Sure they'll wild and need put in the garbage one day. But still, at least she won't be insulted as if you treated her like the maid giving a vacuum. Seriously, vacuums are terrible presents for women during any occasion. Not to mention, they never give you any peace and quiet while they're running.

Seriously, give her flowers, boys. Sure they’ll wild and need put in the garbage one day. But still, at least she won’t be insulted as if you treated her like the maid giving a vacuum. Seriously, vacuums are terrible presents for women during any occasion. Not to mention, they never give you any peace and quiet while they’re running.

24. “People all over the world (everybody)/Join hands (join)/Start a love train, love train.”

From PopSugar: "Watch out, cuz after that train goes through your heart you're pretty much dead." Not to mention, when see that love train going through those 2 hearts, I'm sure that's not what the O'Jays had in mind when they recorded, "Love Train."

From PopSugar: “Watch out, cuz after that train goes through your heart you’re pretty much dead.” Not to mention, when see that love train going through those 2 hearts, I’m sure that’s not what the O’Jays had in mind when they recorded, “Love Train.”

25. Remember “Remembering Day” and give me chocolate. Or else.

From PopSugar: "If your man doesn't remember Valentine's Day with all the holiday advertising madness, he's either blind or a hermit." Also, I don't know about you but this woman seems to give me the creeps as if she seems to have murder on her mind.

From PopSugar: “If your man doesn’t remember Valentine’s Day with all the holiday advertising madness, he’s either blind or a hermit.” Also, I don’t know about you but this woman seems to give me the creeps as if she seems to have murder on her mind.

26. Give the ladies in your life the gift that’ll last a long time: granny panties.

What's even crazier is that this mother and daughter are so happy swinging on their little swings you'd find outside on a tree or swing set. Swinging in your underwear: now that doesn't seem an appropriate activity during the middle of winter.

What’s even crazier is that this mother and daughter are so happy swinging on their little swings you’d find outside on a tree or swing set. Swinging in your underwear: now that doesn’t seem an appropriate activity during the middle of winter. Also funny that these are called, “Lollipops Bubble Duds.”

27. Happy Valentine’s Day from your Jolly Green Giant.

For some reason, receiving a heart shaped box of frozen peas doesn't seem nearly as romantic as getting a box of chocolate. Seriously, who wants peas for Valentine's Day for God's sake? Farmers?

For some reason, receiving a heart shaped box of frozen peas doesn’t seem nearly as romantic as getting a box of chocolate. Seriously, who wants peas for Valentine’s Day for God’s sake? Farmers?

28. Remember, guys, the Whitman master won’t quit at 5 this Valentine’s Day so give your girlfriend chocolate.

Of course, I hope that guy doesn't work himself out. He looks quite old and seems like he's pushing it. Seriously, how does this guy get any sleep?

Of course, I hope that guy doesn’t work himself out. He looks quite old and seems like he’s pushing it. Seriously, how does this guy get any sleep?

29. Make this Valentine’s Day a sweet occasion with this lovely double decker heart shaped cake.

From PopSugar: "How to feel bloated on Valentine's Day — so romantic!" Now this cake looks so Pepto Bismol pink that it's almost making me sick. Seriously, this looks so disgusting that it has diabetes all over it.

From PopSugar: “How to feel bloated on Valentine’s Day — so romantic!” Now this cake looks so Pepto Bismol pink that it’s almost making me sick. Seriously, this looks so disgusting that it has diabetes all over it.

30.Nestle chocolate: A great way to a woman’s heart.

It seems that this woman doesn't just want chocolate which Nestle suggest can sometimes be used as an aphrodisiac. Still, she seems to be hiding an erotic grin under that sumptuous bite sized Nestle bits.

It seems that this woman doesn’t just want chocolate which Nestle suggest can sometimes be used as an aphrodisiac. Still, she seems to be hiding an erotic grin under that sumptuous bite sized Nestle bits.