Here I’m dressed in a sexy witch costume from stuff I found at Goodwill. I was supposed to wear it for a party. However, due to that fucking piece of shit Donald Trump’s visit to a natural gas conference, it was postponed to next week. But since I have to work, I couldn’t go. So now I’m just wearing it for the blog.
I know it’s quite late for costumes since some places already have had their trick-or-treating days. But since it’s usually among the last of my Halloween posts, I go ahead with it, anyway. Nonetheless, while costume stores like Spirit Halloween are filled with any costume your heart desires, some people prefer to make their own. And there are plenty Internet guides to do that. Hell, Goodwill even encourages it. After all, I did this costume above. Though I could only use it for this blog post. Party City also does as well. So for your reading pleasure, I give you another assortment of Halloween DIY costumes to inspire you. Enjoy.
1. The King of the North stands alongside the Mother of Dragons.
Unfortunately, this relationship didn’t end well at all. Because Jon had to kill Daenerys for inflicting mass slaughter upon King’s Landing.
2. “A girl is no one.”
Actually, “a girl is Arya Stark.” She’s supposed to be her when she’s being punished with blindness by the Faceless Men.
3. Feel free to spread your wings like a beautiful butterfly.
You’d think she was touring with Cirque du Soleil. But that is her flamboyant butterfly costume. Or is that a guy?
4. “We all scream for ice cream.”
Like how they make the little boy into the ice cream man. While the wagon’s a truck. The rest are supposed to be ice cream and other delights.
5. Miss Universe greets her many legions of fans.
And yes, that’s how Miss Universe is supposed to be dressed. Kind of sad enough that all the winners come from Earth.
6. Going on a trip to India? You might want to consult the itinerary.
He’s Owen Wilson from The Darjeeling Limited. He’s bandaged like that because he’s been through a very bad accident.
7. Now let’s bring on the burgers.
He’s dressed as a charcoal grill. Still, don’t try to barbecue anything on him.
8. Want to play a game of Twister?
If you land on red, you have to step on his junk. And you have 75% of doing so.
9. All hail Galacta, queen of the Universe.
Hey, at least she’s not the Borg queen. Still, you got to love her amazing crown.
10. She is a true Picasso.
As you can see from her face popping out of the frame. Yeah, didn’t know the women in Picasso’s paintings could exist in real life.
11. Don’t want to touch this boy.
Since he’s a cactus. But even if you get hurt by touching him, at least you won’t get any serious infection.
12. Ladies and Gentlemen, the Rocket Man himself, Sir Elton John.
Okay, I’m not sure who this guy’s supposed to be. But he’s dressed like you’d imagine Elton John to be on Mardi Gras. So I’m going with it.
13. Hail Maleficent, mistress of all Evil.
Actually, she’s supposed to be her when she had wings. But King Stephen had to clip them off and run. What a jerk.
14. Want to ask a question? She may know the answer.
Since she’s dressed like a Magic 8 ball. Wonder how she sits with that thing on.
15. When she shows up, feel free to walk across the street.
For she’s supposed to be a crossing sign. Of course, she’s in a silhouette.
16. Now here’s a Toothless dragon.
He’s dressed as Toothless from How to Train Your Dragon. And yes, he’s incredibly adorable.
17. Be careful when you’re in the mushroom garden.
Yes, all the young women are dressed as mushrooms. While the guy in the middle is dressed as someone who’s clearly on them.
18. You might want to give these 3 women the right of way.
Since they’re 3 blind mice. They even have their own sunglasses and red tipped cane to show they can’t see a thing.
19. You might love this delightful aardvark.
She’s dressed as Arthur from the cartoon. Even wears the yellow sweater and white shirt collar.
20. There’s something a bit disturbing about this cat lady.
Mostly because it’s a guy dressed as one. Yet, you have to like the cats on his pink robe.
21. Instead of being a princess, be a princess of the stars.
And you don’t need to wear white and have your hair look like a couple of cinnabuns. A starry dress will do just fine for your space princess.
22. “Hold the door! Hold the door!”
Such a tearkjerking scene. Nonetheless, the baby’s Hodor. The mother holds the door and acts as Hodor’s legs.
23. Here’s your Captain Limpet and his mermaid queen on your Carnival cruise line.
She’s got blue hair to match her fish tail. Not to mention, carries a trident. He’s got a nice smart coat and captain’s hat.
24. Little Vincent Van Gogh paints his masterpiece.
One boy’s dressed as Starry Night. The other’s dressed as Van Gogh with a bandage on his ear.
25. Please allow Granny to bring her pets.
Sorry, but if you let her bring Sylvester and Tweedy, you might need to clean house after she’s gone. Because Sylvester and Tweedy will incur property damage. I guarantee it.
26. Lucy and Ethel are up to something.
They even wear their own dresses and aprons. Hear they’ll do The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel next year.
27. Nacho Libre always fights for the kids.
Since he’s a monk at an orphanage by day. And yes, he’s a religious man who puts God and man first in his life.
28. “When you play the Game of Thrones, you win or you die.”
Includes Varys, Cersei, Margaery, Bran, Arya, Joffrey, Melisandre, Jon, Catelyn, Ygritte, and the Hound , I think. Must be from an earlier season.
29. Feel free to join Snoopy and the gang.
Parents are Charlie Brown and Lucy. Kids are Snoopy, Sally, and Linus. Woodstock is a plush bird.
30. Adult entertainment straight ahead.
She’s just wearing a sign saying, “Girls, Girls, Girls.” However, she’s not wearing it for a strip club. Or she’d be almost completely nude.
31. Pumpkin Jack just wants to stop by.
This is more of a play on words. Since the jack is a crane you use in oil rigs.
32. Spend a jolly holiday with Mary.
Parents are Mary Poppins and Bert. While the baby and dog are penguin waiters. Dog isn’t happy.
33. I believe we have a terroristic alien on the premises.
She’s dressed in a sleek silver outfit. But who knows what that bomb’s made of.
34. Baby goes paragliding across the landscape.
Don’t worry, the baby’s dad is carrying him in the bjorn. But they’ll have to wear the proper headgear.
35. She’s a tornado filled with sharks.
She’s supposed to be a sharknado. Though it’s a really stupid movie franchise, it’s a brilliant Halloween costume idea.
36. Nothing can stop Arya and the Hound.
So hide all your chicken when they come into town. Even you, KFC. Also, Arya’s a trained assassin. While the Hound used to be in the Kingsguard and wants to kill his brother.
37. She’s a bit of a Fruit Loop.
For she’s dressed as a bowl of Fruit Loops. Part of this complete breakfast.
38. Little girls shouldn’t be alone in the woods.
Yes, she’s Little Red Riding Hood. Even has the red cape and basket. So cute.
39. “You must be chosen by the Claw.”
Indeed, he’s the claw machine. Wonder how he moves his arms.
40. “We have to find Will.”
She’s Joyce from Stranger Things. Even has the living room wall and Christmas lights. Not sure if she’s having any luck reaching Will from the Upside Down.
41. “We rob banks.”
These two wear striped shirts and carry money bags. But you can bet they made out like bandits.
42. Marty McFly can fly on his hoverboard.
Okay, he can’t since physics don’t work that way. Still, the real hoverboards are a massive disappointment.
43. This family’s a circus.
Dad’s a strong man. Mom’s a lion tamer. Baby’s a lion. Daughters are trapeze artist and clown.
44. You’d think she’s rather interstellar.
For she’s dressed up as the solar system. However, she’s mostly stars in the center. When she really should be the sun so the planets can revolve around her.
45. Cleopatra is the queen of the Nile.
Just don’t mention how she had her siblings killed. Also, the fact she married 2 of her brothers and had sex with both Julius Caesar and Marc Antony.
46. Uh, Night’s Watch, you missed a wight.
They’re ice zombies. But the White Walkers and the Night King are way scarier.
47. What the Colonel’s got in his bucket is finger lickin’ good.
I’m sure he uses the chicken bucket as a trick-or-treat bag to hold candy. Still, why can’t KFC use him for their commercials.
48. You’d think this family came from a deck of cards.
Mom and dad are the King and Queen of Hearts. Older boys are black and white guards. Baby is joker.
49. This boy’s got a lot of thread wrapped around him.
After all, he’s a spool. But don’t ask him for any thread to repair your clothes.
50. She’s just crackers about animals.
For she’s an animal cracker. And yes, she’s got icing and sprinkles.
51. Didn’t know Prehistoric man can pump their own gas.
Okay, he’s one of the cavemen from Geico. He also saves 15% or more on his car insurance.
52. You can see a slide through these goggles.
They’re supposed to be a view master and a reel. They were popular during the 1950s, before the conception of personal computers or videos.
53. She’s all stuffed with straw.
Okay, she’s just wearing makeup and old clothes. But don’t expect her to scare the crows.
54. He’s a sophisticated little peanut.
He’s actually Mr. Peanut. He even comes with a top hat, cane, and monocle.
55. A Khal must have his Khaalesi.
Sure, Khal Drogo and Daenerys were happily married together. Unfortunately, he had to die from an infected injury from a fight.
56. Let her paint her masterpiece.
She’s a bunch of paints. Also carries a brush with her. So cute.
57. Let him protect your garden for you.
The boy’s a garden gnome. His shoes have fuzz balls on them. Though he looks kind of freaky.
58. Got to bust this Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.
All right, maybe not. Because this Stay Puft Marshmallow Man is a little stinker. While his dad is a Ghostbuster.
59. Does this family seem a bit spacey to you?
Well, they’re dressed up as astronauts with a metal camper to boot. The girl even has a wagon to act as a spaceship while the baby’s an alien.
60. “We’re Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band….”
The boys are John Lennon and George Harrison. The girls are Ringo Starr and Paul McCartney. And not one of them wears a mustache.
61. You don’t want to cross these mummies.
They’re dressed like Egyptian royalty. But they’re quite scary, especially under wraps.
62. For her, green means go, go, go.
This little girl’s dressed as a traffic light. And yes, it lights up. So cute.
63. This alien tourist wants to see the sights.
Though why he wants me to take me to my leader, I have no idea. Seriously, he should be careful what he wishes for.
64. You dare not cross these Viking men.
These are boys in Viking costumes. The helmets, beards, and shields are made from cardboard.
65. This unicorn always likes to show her rainbow tail.
The mane and tail are both made out of tulle. And yes, she’s also wearing a horn and a pink tutu.
66. This boy will bulldoze to a house near you.
For he’s dressed as a bulldozer. And if you don’t give him candy, he’ll plow his way through to your house.
67. Care for a beach cocktail.
Woman’s the tropical drink. Guy’s a hunky beach waiter. Wanna sip?
68. “I’m a Rocketman.”
For the kid can reach to the stars in his rocket ship costume. So cute.
69. They’re just a couple of vacationers.
Funny how they both wear Hawaiian shirts, fanny packs, socks, sandals, and straw hats. They even carry red Dixie cups.
70. You’d think she spends all day under the sea.
She makes Esme Squalor’s sexy Ursula outfit seem tame in comparison. She even has fish hanging from wires.
71. The angler fish is a creature from the deep.
If you think they’re scary in the dark, just wait until you hear about their sex lives. And yes, it’s that messed up.
72. You’d think she’s quite the potted plant.
Well, she’s a pot of flowers. Though these are all white.
73. This little spaceman’s going places.
He’s wearing a little NASA jumpsuit. And yes, he’s adorable. Another little rocket man.
74.”And the Oscar goes to…”
One of them even has 2 heads. Wonder how they walk in these.
75. Queen Nefertiti was a great beauty of Ancient Egypt.
She was the wife of Akhenaten. Yet, she eventually disappears from the records and we have no idea what happened to her.
76. You can call this a real corn dog.
Since it’s a dog that’s dressed as an ear of corn. And no, you can’t eat it.
77. “One ring to rule them all.”
This group’s dressed as the cast from Lord of the Rings. Some of the women even dress up as hobbits. Like Treebeard’s.
78. Anyone want a gumball?
This little baby’s dressed up as a gumball machine. But please don’t give her quarters since she might choke on them.
79. Miss Frizzle reaches for the stars.
But that doesn’t mean you’d want her teaching your kids. Since she’ll send her students to space on at least a few occasions.
80. Fire and smores always go together.
Because you can’t have smores without a camp fire. Also, smores are tasty.
81. Jay-Z and Beyoncé always treat Blue Ivy like a queen.
They also have twins. Yet, this family totally nails the Carters. Not to be confused with Johnny Cash’s in-laws.
82. These girls are ready to exercise.
These girls are 1980s aerobics instructors. And yes, they’re wearing leotards and carrying boomboxes.
83. Wonder what she’s got in the oven.
She’s dressed up as the Pillsbury Doughboy. And yes, she’s got her own rolling pin.
84. Perhaps this Sandlot family will endear you.
The dad’s Benjamin Rodriguez. The mom’s Wendy Peppercorn. While the boys dress up as 2 of the other kids. There’s even a large dog.
85. This family will certainly have a sweet time.
They’re characters from the traumatic childhood board game Candyland. Dad’s the king. Mom’s Queen Frosty. One daughter’s Princess Lollipop. The other is from the Candy Cane Forest. I forget who the boy’s supposed to be.
86. She’s certainly got a green thumb.
Since she’s dressed up as a flower pot. And yes, flowers grow from her shirt.
87. Rock out with some sushi.
This one features a whole platter. Also she’s wearing a rice ball on her head.
88. “President coming through.”
These babies are dressed as the President of the United States. While the dads are assigned Secret Service detail. Either tot is better than the steaming pile of orange shit in the White House now.
89. “I’m on my way to Folsom playpen…”
He’s dressed up as Johnny Cash. Notice how he’s got a toy guitar. So cute.
90. Always have your raygun and oxygen supply in handy.
She’s dressed as an astronaut on a strange planet that could have intelligent life. So she’ll have to protect herself from hostile aliens.
91. We got a strange lady asking if we saw the Stark girls.
She’s dressed as Brienne of Tarth. She’s got golden armor for she’s one of the truest knights on Game of Thrones. If you want a knight in shining armor to rescue her, she’s your go-to girl.
92. Do you want lemonade or ice cream?
Ice cream always gets my vote. But these stands are adorable.
93. “Be a shining star.”
But please don’t dance like Elaine does to that Earth, Wind, and Fire song. Love her star hat.
94. You can use a Hershey’s Kiss.
She’s decked out in foil and puckers her lips. And yes, she has a paper stream on her hat.
95. You don’t want to beat a stick on this little piñata.
The costume is mostly made out of felt. Nonetheless, it’s adorable.
96. Is she a zombie or is just her lead-based makeup?
Actually I think she’s an 18th century zombie. From what I can tell, she’s an aristocrat on her way to the ball before she was tragically murdered.
97. These are just 2 of Heinz’s 57 Varieties.
This is actually a vintage photo. One kid is ketchup. The other is mustard.
98. Is it somebody’s birthday?
The candle flame is made from tulle. And she’s all covered in sprinkles.
99. These kids are in love and will run away together.
One’s a teenage girl with 3 brothers whose mom’s having an affair with the local sheriff. The other is an orphaned boy on a summer camping trip with his Boy Scout troop.
100. “Keep your hands off my lobby boy!”
That’s Zero from The Grand Budapest Hotel. Helps his boss steal a painting and wins over a girl at a bake shop. However, his boss is killed by Nazis and his wife suddenly dies in childbirth.