One controversial aspect of the Christmas season in the United States is SantaCon. In mid-December, revelers don yuletide costumes and gather in many cities in an annual pub crawl. The New York SantaCon has been termed, “a drunken shitshow” by Gothamist as well as received complaints by residents along with reports of public vomiting and urination. And it goes without saying that seeing a drunken Santa peeing on the street, puking in a nearby trash can, or doing a bunch of R-rated mischief to get in police custody might traumatize a young child for life. Nonetheless, we should concede that despite the havoc SantaCon may wreak in communities, there could be worse things. Just look at what happened in Charlottesville, Virginia back in August 2017. I mean while SantaCon participants might litter, vandalize, puke, and do what have you, they just want to party and have fun. Though their way of enjoyment may not be remarkably healthy, decent, or safe. While the Unite the Right guys in Charlottesville were white supremacists who inflicted violence against counter-protestors. Still, I mainly do SantaCon posts as a way to make fun of the costumes. Not as a way to endorse the event. Anyway, for your reading pleasure, I give you another treasury of SantaCon costumes.
- Behold, all hail the mighty Viking Claus.
He has horns on his Santa hat. Though I’m not sure if that’s a proper Viking drink.
2. Two Santas are always better than one.
Though one Santa wears shorts. While the other wears a skirt of tulle.
3. When you need to go on a holiday pub craw at 3 and a 49ers game at 5.
He has a 49ers style Santa suit on. But either way, he’ll come home wasted.
4. This Santa seems a bit horse.
Since he has a horse mask on. While he’s wearing a mere Santa shirt.
5. One of Santa’s elves has left the building.
Though she could easily be working for a mall Santa nearby. Yet, she wears a red dress over her green tights.
6. You can’t go wrong with a corset.
She wears a sexy Santa dress with her Santa hat. While her boots are super fuzzy.
7. She seems quite frosty today.
Yes, this is a sexy snowman outfit. I know it’s not appropriate for snow weather in any respect. Like the fuzzy boots though.
8. Perhaps you might prefer striped tights.
This woman wears a more modest Santa dress. Her boots are trimmed with fur and red bows.
9. You better watch out because Santa Pimp is coming to town.
He wears a long red coat with red pants and a red hat. Oh, and he has a chain around his neck. But he’s not a nice guy since he has women debase themselves for money.
10. Have you ever met the dreaded Santabot?
He’s a robot Santa. So his suit is part of his build. But don’t push his buttons.
11. Mrs. Claus always needs a long, sleek dress.
She wears a white fake fur cape over her strapless dress. Also includes Santa hat.
12. Who says Santa suits can’t be sexy?
Not sure if that’s right. Though I know it’s supposed to be a dress. But Santa isn’t meant to be sexy, at least in the conventional sense.
13. These women always know how to be in the present.
Actually, they’re dressed as presents. While 2 of them think they’re God’s gift to men.
14. Sometimes it’s best to go all out on red and furs.
Indeed, this is another Santa dress. But this one comes with transparent red tights and a matching frock cape.
15. You can’t have SantaCon without the Grinch and Cindy Lou Who.
The Grinch is in his Santa suit. While Cindy Lou Who is in her trademark hair as well as dons a black dress with fur trim.
16. Even Santa occasionally prefers his comfy clothes.
He just wears a red robe. His beard is cotton. But he’s wearing crazy glasses for some reason.
17. You can’t go wrong with a square Santa hat.
He even wears a chain necklace saying “Ho Ho Ho.” While his hair is untidy and black.
18. A flashy Christmas tree dress will make the season bright.
She has a top of sequins and tinsel. While her skirt has plenty of bows. As her hat is a star topper.
19. It always pays to look one’s best for SantaCon.
Though one of them sports a rather revealing fishnet top. Not sure how that’s going to keep her warm on a cold day.
20. I suppose an elf can arrive in a poncho.
Well, it’s more of a dress. But based on the sleeve cut, it might as well be a poncho.
21. Perhaps one might prefer a green dress of fur.
She’s supposed to be the female version of The Ghost of Christmas Present. Though she doesn’t have a beard, obviously.
22. Mrs. Claus always has to have a fancy dress.
Here she wears a lovely dress with green and gold decoration. Though she looks a bit young to be elderly.
23. It doesn’t take much to be merry.
Though this seems more appropriate for a Christmas party at a strip club. Seriously, that leotard doesn’t look practical in any respect.
24. A Santa dress can always have tulle trim.
Here these women wear belts and Santa hats. Though you can tell that their outfits are DIY.
25. I suppose she’s from the kitchen.
Well, she wears an apron with holly on it. While her collar has a green bow.
26. Santa doesn’t always have to wear a traditional hat.
This is a candy cane jester hat. As this Santa holds a megaphone with red snowflakes inside.
27. This lamp seems to be throwing some shade.
Well, she’s supposed to be the leg lamp from A Christmas story. But you wouldn’t know from the coat.
28. Perhaps you might want to be sweet in this candy cane dress.
Her dress is mostly red with a red and white striped skirt. Helps that she has green hair.
29. This Christmas season, beware of the Krampus.
Unlike Santa, he’s known to kidnap and punish the bad boys and girls. So it’s best to keep away from him.
30. Don’t like red? Go green instead.
She wears a green Santa dress with matching gloves. Though she might feel cold on her shoulders as well as between her skirt and stockings.
31. A Snowflake Princess is a certified winter darling.
Though her skirt’s quite short. While she dons a snowflake crown.
32. Any girl at SantaCon would love to don this reindeer dress.
Her dress is mostly brown. Yet, it includes antlers and fuzzy leggings.
33. Say hello to Frosty the Snowman.
Actually, it’s a guy dressed as Frosty the Snowman. And no, he can’t melt at room temperature.
34. When Jack Frost comes to town, things get cold.
After all, he’s a spirit known to make things freeze in the winter snow. Best you be careful when he’s around.
35. Anyone would love a girl dressed as a candy cane.
Her outfit mostly consists of red and white stripes like a candy cane. While she wears leggings of white fake fur.
36. Some may want a Christmas get up with animal prints.
Even has a matching Santa hat. Still, I find animal prints as unspeakably tacky.
37. Seems like Santa’s got a present.
This Santa wears a regular red suit and fedora. While the woman next to him is a present.
38. The Virgin Mary seems rather predisposed to reindeer.
Don’t worry, the baby Jesus is a doll. Yet, Mary sure has a fine golden halo.
39. Santas come in all shapes and sizes.
One even has mecha gear. While another wears a helmet.
40. Indeed, fishnets might match red velvet and white fur.
Here she is on snowy ground. Wonder why her legs don’t shiver.
41. A Santa can’t go out without a fur coat.
These Santas wear sunglasses and bauble necklaces. Yet, they sport very different hairstyles.
42. Sometimes Santa has to wear a gas mask.
Wonder where he’s at that he’d need one. Also, the fur fringe looks quite gray.
43. When in doubt, go with capes.
All the capes have a wintry design. While they wear a variety of red pants.
44. SantaCon is a bit different in Hawaii.
These people want “Universal Elfcare 4 All.” Wonder what the North Pole workplace environment is like.
45. Santa always sees you when you’re sleeping.
He even has his own scepter. But you better be good for goodness sake.
46. Feel free to come to SantaCon in your pajamas.
Though one dresses as a polar bear. While 2 wear Christmas suits.
47. You’d think their dresses were quite gingerly.
Well, they’re in gingerbread dresses. But unlike gingerbread men, they wear bows.
48. Seems like these people are for the ginger cause.
Actually you don’t need gingers to make gingerbread. Still, like the guy’s Santa suit and lights.
49. Santa and his elves mean business.
Santa wears a collar shirt and a red sweater. While his elves don business suits.
50. Say hello to Santa’s decontamination squad.
Since they’ve got gasmasks, goggles, and hazmat suits alongside their Christmas gear. Hell, they’re even wearing garlands of tinsel.
51. On Christmas, you have to take the green with the red.
She wears an elf jacket over her red dress. While she has long candy cane stockings on her legs.
52. Even Santa can use a seaside vacation now and then.
He’s donned in a Christmas themed Hawaiian shirt. Though I’m not sure what he’s looking for.
53. Candy canes should always go with Christmas trees.
The woman wears a candy cane dress. While the guy wears Christmas tree regalia.
54. Mrs. Claus has to make a formal impression.
Yet, this seems more like White Christmas than SantaCon. Still, it’s quite a lovely dress.
55. Never fear, Super Rudolph is here.
So when did Rudolph get a six-pack and a spandex speedo? Seriously, this is a dumb costume on so many levels.
56. Buddy always enjoys working on his snowflakes.
Okay, Buddy’s not really an elf. But man, his snowflakes are amazing.
57. Seems like someone has come with a Christmas tree.
Well, it’s someone dressed up as a Christmas tree. But you wouldn’t know that unless you look at the legs.
58. This elf woman knows how to make the toys.
She even uses power tools. Makes you wonder what kind of toys she makes.
59. Presenting…Santa Squid.
Yes, it’s Santa in a red squid outfit. Not sure how he manages to pull that off.
60. Santa hangs out with a few of his reindeer.
Then again, female reindeer do have antlers during the Christmas season. But these women just wear antlers and shades of beige.
61. A Christmas tree can always use some tinsel.
Well, she has her tree décor over her green dress. As her star is made from tinsel.
62. There’s not much to this snowman dress.
By the way, that’s Katy Perry before she got her blond pixie cut. And yes, she’s wearing stick gloves.
63. Sometimes in Santa costumes, less is more.
She has herself laced in this dress. But it’s barely a dress.
64. Of course, the North Pole has to have a strip club.
I don’t know if the North Pole does. But this woman certainly dresses like a stripper near Santa’s workshop.
65. These toy soldiers seem dead inside.
Hell, the nutcracker doesn’t even look that creepy. Seriously, these women freak me out.
66. She’s bound to cause a lot of uproar in her SantaCon costume.
Because she’s a red cup from Starbucks. So she’s known to get a lot of furor from the folks at Fox News.
67. I’m sure this dress will bring in the holidays.
Yes, I know she’s in a scantily clad outfit. But she wears a bow and fishnet stockings.
68. Santa doesn’t seem to like what he sees at the pool.
Apparently, Santa wears an old-timey swimsuit. And he’s just saw some guy in a speedo.
69. Santa seems to have beer goggles.
He’s supposed to be a drunk Santa. But he looks too much like a hunk.
70. SantaCon is coming to a galaxy near you.
I mean these guys have Imperial Stormtrooper helmets on. Don’t worry, they can’t shoot straight, anyway.
71. Some are excited for presents. Some are presents.
Some of them are in wrapped gift boxes. Hope they can sit down once in awhile.
72. Gingerbread people always stick together.
There we have a gingerbread man and his lady inside a joint. And yes, they’re adorable.
73. Seems like we got a couple of ornaments.
Well, they’re wearing shiny ornament costumes. Though they look kind of deflated.
74. It’s Santa’s pit crew to the rescue.
You can tell since they’re elves with flight goggles. Yes, that’s a female Santa.
75. You can always inflate yourself to play Santa.
Well, he’s wearing an inflatable Santa suit. Not sure how he’ll get out of it.
76. This Santa Claus is mostly nice.
But even he can be a bit naughty. Yet, he’s also covered in money. So he’s kind of a con man.
77. Guess it’s Darth Vader’s turn to play Santa at the Galactic Empire’s Christmas party.
He may know who’s naughty or nice. But this Santa is squarely on the Dark Side.
78. Introducing….Camo Santa.
Yet, I don’t think bright red makes great camouflage. Still, it’s pretty funny.
79. When it comes to reindeer costumes, it’s best to keep it simple.
They’re dressed in black with tulle skirt. But don’t forget the antlers.
80. Is that Mrs. Claus?
Actually that’s a guy, which you can tell by his beard. But at least he’s wearing an ugly sweater and a Santa dress.