After carrying Kit Snicket in the only good deed he’d ever do in his life, Count Olaf kisses her as he lays her down on the sand before he collapses beside her. Because while he’s cured of the Medusoid Mycelium, he’s still profusely bleeding from a harpoon wound thanks to Ishmael. Kit reaches out and tenderly touches his ankle as she recites a poem “The Night Has a Thousand Eyes” while Olaf answers it with the last stanza of “This Be the Verse” before biting the dust with a “HA!” A poignant end to one of the most iconic villains in literature. It’s heavily hinted that the two may have had a relationship in the past, but I’m sure Kit dumped Olaf at some point because well, do I really need to get into that? Because he’s a bastard. I’m sure this leads the Baudelaires stunned out of their minds since they’ve never seen Count Olaf like this before. However, he has realized that he has nothing left to live for since he’s lost all his henchmen, his parents, his girlfriend, and his true love. All his plans are ruined. And he has no chance of obtaining the Baudelaire fortune or anyone else’s, which has made him too depressed to go on living for a time. And what’s interesting is despite everything Count Olaf did to them, the Baudelaires would sometimes visit his grave during their time on the island.

The song I went with is “On this Night of a Thousand Stars” from Evita, which introduces Augustin Magaldi who took Eva Duarte to Buenos Aires as far as the musical is concerned. Despite that this incident never happened in real life because they never met. In real life, Eva got into Buenos Aires through family members since the city offered the promise of a better life. She didn’t bet on winning the lottery like meeting an ambitious army colonel named Juan Peron and becoming the First Lady of Argentina. In this version, Kit and Count Olaf recite poetry to one another as the Baudelaires look stunned while helping Kit give birth.

“The Night Has a Thousand Eyes”

Lemony Snicket:
Now Count Olaf had nothing left to live for
His past methods and tactics don’t work
No henchmen, no cash
No girlfriend, no true love
No chance of obtaining a fortune
At the age of fifty

Now dying from a harpoon wound
The dreaded Count Olaf
Carried my sister to from the shore
His only good deed

Kit Snicket:
The night has a thousand eyes
And the day but only one
Yet the light of the bright world dies
Dies with the dying sun

The mind has a thousand eyes
And the heart but only one
Yet the heart of the whole life
Dies when love is done

Violet:
I never dreamed that Count Olaf could be as kind as this
But now I know that he can

Klaus:
He was always there putting us through nightmares
Now he’s a shell of that man
Now all my hate disappeared and all my troubling fears
Isn’t there anymore
On this terrible day when he seems slipping away
To no more
On this night
On this night

Count Olaf:
Man hands on misery to man.
Deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can.
Don’t have kids yourself.