In The Reptile Room, the Baudelaires’ next guardian is a noted herpetologist Dr. Montgomery Montgomery who’s said to be their “late father’s cousin’s wife’s brother.” Unlike their previous guardian Count Olaf, Uncle Monty is a much more friendly man who invites the kids to coconut cake (or carrots in Sunny’s case) as well as gives them free rein of the house. He then shows the children his collection to a giant hall called the reptile room where they meet a snake he recently discovered called “The Incredibly Deadly Viper.” But don’t worry, its name is a misnomer since its completely harmless as a prank to avenge those at the Herpetological Society who make fun of his name. Besides, it becomes fast friends with Sunny. He also tells the kids that they’ll be going to an expedition to Peru once his new assistant Stephano shows up, since the previous guy abruptly resigned (actually he was murdered). And he gives each Baudelaire new jobs such as inventing traps for Violet, reading snake books for Klaus, and biting rope to usable pieces for Sunny.

A good song for this time would be “A Whole New World” from Disney’s Aladdin. The original version has Aladdin and Jasmine take a magic carpet ride under the stars in a heartfelt duet. And it’s one of the best-known songs from the film. In this version, I have Uncle Monty introduce the Baudelaire children to the reptile room and its contents.

 

“A Whole Snake World”

Sung by Dr. Montgomery and the Baudelaires

Dr. Montgomery:
Let me show you my lab
Crawling, slithering, snake things
Tell me, children, now when did
You last see these reptilians?

Let me open your eyes
Show you wonder by wonder
Cobras, pythons, and vipers
In my large menagerie

A whole snake world
A grand fantastic point of view
In my reptile room
Please hold them, too
And help me with their feeding

A whole snake world
A dazzling place you never knew
But while you stay in here
It’s gloves you wear
Since some of these can kill you when they bite

Violet: Sunny, don’t go near that deadly viper

Dr. Montgomery:
Unbelievable sights
Indescribable creatures
Check my latest discovery
My Incredibly Deadly Viper guy

Dr. Montgomery: A whole snake world

Klaus: Don’t you dare close your eyes

Dr. Montgomery: A hundred thousand things to see
Violet: Oh, my God, that thing bit Sunny

Dr. Montgomery:
It’s alright she’ll be fine
It can’t hurt a fly
I’m named it just to troll my colleagues

Dr. Montgomery: A whole new world
Klaus: Every turn, a surprise
Dr. Montgomery: With new horizons to pursue
Violet: Well, at least this is better

Dr. Montgomery:
You’ll find snakes everywhere
There’s time to spare
So I’ll take you down on a trip down to Peru

Dr. Montgomery: A whole snake world
Violet: A whole snake world
Dr. Montgomery: That’s where we’ll be
Klaus: That’s where we’ll be
Dr. Montgomery: A wondrous place
Violet: A better place
Dr. Montgomery: For you and me