Swedish Chef Worthy Muppet Treats

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There’s a lot to talk about food in the Muppets world. Sometimes the food can even talk, sing, and move like sentient beings. Even if they’re baked goods and vegetables. Really. Same goes when it comes to Sesame Street, especially when they’re trying to get kids to eat healthy. Don’t ask. Also, Hooper’s Store and Charlie’s are among Sesame Street’s premiere eating places. One serves as a resident hangout. The other is where Grover works as a waiter since he has ultimate job security despite massively sucking at customer service skills. I mean there was a sketch he basically ordered 6 cakes for a birthday party because he didn’t realize that the guests were referring to one person. Seriously. And that bald blue-headed customer is always complaining about him. On the Muppet Show we have the one and only Swedish Chef whose culinary endeavors always lead to some kind of cooking catastrophe. These include a turtle aiming at him with tank guns, being held up at gunpoint by lobsters, being attacked by spaghetti, being chased by a chicken wielding a cleaver, and more. He also uses a lot of unconventional kitchen implements like battle axes, blunderbusses, chainsaws, bazookas, and more. Off-screen, you’ll find plenty of Muppet treats out there mostly made for parties. So for your reading pleasure I give you a treasure trove of delectable Muppet treats. Enjoy.

  1. For a Rainbow Connection cake, this one of Kermit is perfect.
Of course, the rainbow in this cake is in the inside. Because that's the side that really counts.

Of course, the rainbow in this cake is in the inside. Because that’s the side that really counts.

2. These Sesame Street chocolates make it fun to learn your ABCs.

By the way, these are professionally made. But you wouldn't mind putting this cuteness in your mouth.

By the way, these are professionally made. But you wouldn’t mind putting this cuteness in your mouth.

3. If you love the Muppets, then take a look at this cake.

It's a cake of the Muppets onstage at the Muppet theater. You know where they do the show.

It’s a cake of the Muppets onstage at the Muppet theater. You know where they do the show.

4. This buttercream Beaker cake is a wondrous breakthrough in pastry creation.

Compared to some of the cakes you'll see here, this seems relatively easy. Mostly because Beaker has identifiable features and his shape.

Compared to some of the cakes you’ll see here, this seems relatively easy. Mostly because Beaker has identifiable features and his shape.

5. These Muppet bento lunches are a healthy treat.

These lunches consist of Kermit fruit snacks, Animal salad, and a Miss Piggy sandwich. So cute.

These lunches consist of Kermit fruit snacks, Animal salad, and a Miss Piggy sandwich. So cute.

6. A Beaker twinkie makes a great tasty snack.

This one even has him screaming with icing. Also, like Beaker, the twinkie probably has a lot of artificial preservatives by now.

This one even has him screaming with icing. Also, like Beaker, the twinkie probably has a lot of artificial preservatives by now.

7. Nothing makes a party a hit like these Muppet Show cookies.

Sure they may be professionally made. But they include all your favorites. Well, they should.

Sure they may be professionally made. But they include all your favorites. Well, they should.

8. This Miss Piggy bento lunch is sow fabulous.

It consists of a sandwich with pasta hair. Also bread ears and snout. But it surely resembles her.

It consists of a sandwich with pasta hair. Also bread ears and snout. But it surely resembles her.

9. Might want to take a bite out of this Electric Mayhem bus cake.

You might've seen the bus in the Muppet Movie. Also, I think the Electric Mayhem may be on the other side.

You might’ve seen the bus in the Muppet Movie. Also, I think the Electric Mayhem may be on the other side.

10. Seems like the Swedish Chef is on top of the pots with this cake.

Well, pots and pans. And they're all on top of an active burner. Love it.

Well, pots and pans. And they’re all on top of an active burner. Hope he doesn’t get, burnt, burnt, burnt.

11. This Muppet theater cake is simply a spectacle.

Yes, I know it's another Muppet Theater cake. But this one even has boxes for Statler and Waldorf. Also the Muppets are in action.

Yes, I know it’s another Muppet Theater cake. But this one even has boxes for Statler and Waldorf. Also the Muppets are in action.

12. Now that has to be a stellar Muppet cake display.

I think this might be for a wedding. Yet, the serving display has tiers featuring cupcakes of your favorite Muppet characters.

I think this might be for a wedding. Yet, the serving display has tiers featuring cupcakes of your favorite Muppet characters.

13. This Cookie Monster cake shows the lovable blue monster in cookie heaven.

Yes, Cookie Monster is in the cookie jar with his chocolate chip cookies. Hope he doesn't overdo it.

Yes, Cookie Monster is in the cookie jar with his chocolate chip cookies. Hope he doesn’t overdo it.

14. This Elmo pizza is pure lunch time fun.

Unlike in most pizzas, the sauce goes over the cheese. Yet at least the got his smile right.

Unlike in most pizzas, the sauce goes over the cheese. Yet at least the got his smile right.

15. If you’re hungry on the go, make it a Beaker wrap.

At least you don't have to put this in the oven. It even has carrot hair and a guacamole shirt and olive tie.

At least you don’t have to put this in the oven. It even has carrot hair and a guacamole shirt and olive tie.

16. This cake is about as trashy as Oscar the Grouch likes it.

Strangely it has a recycling symbol on it. But it has a lot of crap that Oscar will think as a fitting tribute to him.

Strangely it has a recycling symbol on it. But it has a lot of crap that Oscar will think as a fitting tribute to him.

17. If you like peanut butter, these Fozzie Bear cookies will make you say, “Wocka, Wocka.”

They're just peanut butter cookies shaped like Fozzie and decorated in his likeness. What more can you ask for?

They’re just peanut butter cookies shaped like Fozzie and decorated in his likeness. What more can you ask for?

18. As you may know, it’s not easy being the Green Lantern.

This cake has Kermit the Frog as the Green Lantern. Because being green kind of suits him. After all, he's a frog.

This cake has Kermit the Frog as the Green Lantern. Because being green kind of suits him. After all, he’s a frog.

19. If you’re not into superheroes, this Kermit cake will do.

It just has Kermit being his laid back self. Not minding anyone's business but his own.

It just has Kermit being his laid back self. Not minding anyone’s business but his own.

20. For more healthy options, try this Kermit fruit snack.

This Kermit has an apple head, a celery neck, and a beet mouth. But it's a real good likeness.

This Kermit has an apple head, a celery neck, and a beet mouth. But it’s a real good likeness.

21. Looks like Cookie Monster couldn’t resist what was in the cookie jar.

No wonder they have Sesame Street skits in which he has to learn self-control. Only to forget it shortly after. Because he's Cookie Monster.

No wonder they have Sesame Street skits in which he has to learn self-control. Only to forget it shortly after. Because he’s Cookie Monster.

22. For lunch, this Swedish Chef sandwich will make you say, “Bork, Bork, Bork!”

Has a bread face with bread crust beard and eyebrows. But his hat is made from tortilla. Enjoy.

Has a bread face with bread crust beard and eyebrows. But his hat is made from tortilla. Enjoy.

23. How would you like Animal to burst from the drum cake?

After all, Animal plays the drums. Guess this is for a kid's 10th birthday. Fair enough.

After all, Animal plays the drums. Guess this is for a kid’s 10th birthday. Fair enough.

24. Speaking of Animal, this Electric Mayhem cake rocks.

And they all seem to be tired after a show on the road. Then again, this group was modeled after 1960s and 1970s rock bands.

And they all seem to be tired after a show on the road. Then again, this group was modeled after 1960s and 1970s rock bands.

25. These Cookie Monster cupcakes look good enough to eat.

I especially like hoe they have cookies coming out of his mouth. That's very ingenious and touching to everyone's favorite junk food hound.

I especially like hoe they have cookies coming out of his mouth. That’s very ingenious and touching to everyone’s favorite junk food hound.

26. How about a cake of Gonzo the Great?

You know the daredevil with a chicken fetish. Don't worry, his relationship with Camilla is of mutual love and respect.

You know the daredevil with a chicken fetish. Don’t worry, his relationship with Camilla is of mutual love and respect.

27. For the curmudgeon who has nothing nice to say, you might want to celebrate their birthday with a cake of Statler and Waldorf.

Sure Statler and Waldorf are mean old men. But at least their insults are always PG rated. Gotta love these guys.

Sure Statler and Waldorf are mean old men. But at least their insults are always PG rated. Gotta love these guys.

28. For Muppet Show lovers, this is a great cake for you.

After all, this shows how the Muppets are introduced. Even Statler and Waldorf who are usually in the audience.

After all, this shows how the Muppets are introduced. Even Statler and Waldorf who are usually in the audience.

29. Nothing makes a great Sesame Street party like these fruit platters.

This has a kiwi Oscar, a pineapple Bert, a watermelon Elmo, and an orange Ernie. Well, at least those are the prominent fruits on their trays.

This has a kiwi Oscar, a pineapple Bert, a watermelon Elmo, and an orange Ernie. Well, at least those are the prominent fruits on their trays.

30. These Kermit rainbow fruit kabobs will help kids establish a healthy rainbow connection.

This one has Kermit as an apple centerpiece. But it's still a delightful Muppet platter.

This one has Kermit as an apple centerpiece. But it’s still a delightful Muppet platter.

31. For growing brains, this Sesame Street lunch makes learning fun.

This one includes rice balls of Bert, Ernie, Big Bird, Oscar, Elmo, and Cookie Monster. And they're surrounded by salad.

This one includes rice balls of Bert, Ernie, Big Bird, Oscar, Elmo, and Cookie Monster. And they’re surrounded by salad.

32. Cookie Monster fudge makes a delectable dessert to violently gorge for.

These are in light blue and have cookies in them. Cookie Monster would be touched.

These are in light blue and have cookies in them. Cookie Monster would be touched.

33. No one could resist this Muppet toy box cake.

This one only consists of the main Muppets along with Elmo and Cookie Monster. But it's nonetheless adorable.

This one only consists of the main Muppets along with Elmo and Cookie Monster. But it’s nonetheless adorable.

34. A singing Kermit under a rainbow always makes a great cake.

Like how it says, "Life is fun when you're having flies!" Well, to a frog. To a human not so much.

Like how it says, “Life is fun when you’re having flies!” Well, to a frog. To a human not so much.

35. Hope this bento lunch doesn’t make you grouchy.

Nice Oscar consists of a salad of leafy greens. Slimey even has his own trash can.

Nice Oscar consists of a salad of leafy greens. Slimey even has his own trash can.

36. If you like Fozzie Bear, then these Rice Krispie treats will suit your fancy.

These seem to resemble him more than the peanut butter cookies. Like the icing face though.

These seem to resemble him more than the peanut butter cookies. Like the icing face though.

37. Speaking of Rice Krispie treats, you can’t resist these ones from Sesame Street.

Includes Cookie Monster, Oscar, and Elmo. Each has a cookie mouth. Though Elmo and Oscar have Oreo for black.

Includes Cookie Monster, Oscar, and Elmo. Each has a cookie mouth. Though Elmo and Oscar have Oreo for black.

38. This Kermit might remind an old frog of home.

After all, Kermit is a swamp frog from the American South. So playing a banjo makes sense though he doesn't have an accent.

After all, Kermit is a swamp frog from the American South. So playing a banjo makes sense though he doesn’t have an accent.

39. Help yourself to some Animal pasta salad.

Well, it's the only kind of pasta with pink noodles. Just to match Animal's fur.

Well, it’s the only kind of pasta with pink noodles. Just to match Animal’s fur.

40. For lunch time delights, this Swedish Chef bento has all the trimmings.

This one includes a Swedish Chef sandwich and chicken eggs. Seems he wants to cook them both.

This one includes a Swedish Chef sandwich and chicken eggs. Seems he wants to cook them both.

41. This Piggy pasta salad will make you go hog wild.

Doesn't hurt it includes ham. Or does it? Like how they used noodles for her hair though.

Doesn’t hurt it includes ham. Or does it? Like how they used noodles for her hair though.

42. If you liked the Dark Crystal, take a look at this cake.

It's one of those cult movies that feature Muppets in high fantasy. But I include this since it's part of Jim Henson's repertoire.

It’s one of those cult movies that feature Muppets in high fantasy. But I include this since it’s part of Jim Henson’s repertoire.

43. Swedish Chef fans would appreciate a cake of the cook in his kitchen.

Of course, the Swedish Chef's kitchen environment makes Gordon Ramsay's look tame. Then again, I'm sure if constant insults is better than a turtle shell tank or armed lobsters.

Of course, the Swedish Chef’s kitchen environment makes Gordon Ramsay’s look tame. Then again, I’m sure if constant insults is better than a turtle shell tank or armed lobsters.

44. These Muppet bon bons are a small delight.

They're all just sitting up around a candy. Not sure if they're cakes. But these are cute.

They’re all just sitting up around a candy. Not sure if they’re cakes. But these are cute.

45. A Sesame Street lunch like this is great for sunny days.

Seems of the bento box variety. Yet, though Ernie is made from rice, Bert is made from corn. Like the flowers, too.

Seems of the bento box variety. Yet, though Ernie is made from rice, Bert is made from corn. Like the flowers, too.

46. No dessert platter is complete without these Muppet cake pops.

Includes Beaker, Fozzie, Kermit, Miss Piggy, and Rowlf. And I hope each one has a chocolate center.

Includes Beaker, Fozzie, Kermit, Miss Piggy, and Rowlf. And I hope each one has a chocolate center.

47. No one can resist the sight of Gonzo eyeing spaghetti.

Yes, you have to look at Gonzo's big eyes as he holds up a knife and fork. Adorable.

Yes, you have to look at Gonzo’s big eyes as he holds up a knife and fork. Adorable.

48. Learn letters and numbers with these Sesame Street cake pops.

Includes Oscar, Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Big Bird. And each looks good enough to eat.

Includes Oscar, Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Big Bird. And each looks good enough to eat.

49. Fans of Fraggle Rock will fall in love with this cake.

For a show that came in the 1980s, it has a strange pop culture presence to this day. Yet, I'm not familiar with it.

For a show that came in the 1980s, it has a strange pop culture presence to this day. Yet, I’m not familiar with it.

50. For appetizers, these Sesame Street snack platters shall serve you well.

There's broccoli Oscar, strawberry Elmo, blueberry Cookie Monster, and cheddar cheese Big Bird. Like how Big Bird's nose is made from Ritz crackers.

There’s broccoli Oscar, strawberry Elmo, blueberry Cookie Monster, and cheddar cheese Big Bird. Like how Big Bird’s nose is made from Ritz crackers.

51. No Muppet party is complete without a Scooter cheese ball.

Like how his hair is made from baby carrots. And how his glasses are made from cucumber slices.

Like how his hair is made from baby carrots. And how his glasses are made from cucumber slices.

52. This Muppet totem pole cake will make your party tops.

Not sure about the concept behind this. But I think it's quite original to say the least.

Not sure about the concept behind this. But I think it’s quite original to say the least.

53. These Sesame Street cupcakes are a tasty treat.

I'm sure these are professionally made with the detail. But these do consist on some of the best characters save for the Count.

I’m sure these are professionally made with the detail. But these do consist on some of the best characters save for the Count.

54. There’s nothing healthier for a midday meal than a Beaker sandwich.

Helps it has a lot of fruit and veggies in it. Not sure about the shaved orange nose though.

Helps it has a lot of fruit and veggies in it. Not sure about the shaved orange nose though.

55. No child can ever resist the Elmo bento lunch.

Well, if they're pre-schoolers, anyway. Still, like how it has 2 small buns. Adorable.

Well, if they’re pre-schoolers, anyway. Still, like how it has 2 small buns. Adorable.

56. If you liked Rowlf the Dog, then this is the cake for you.

Here he is at a white piano and in a white suit. But he's still typical Rowlf.

Here he is at a white piano and in a white suit. But he’s still typical Rowlf.

57. Fraggle Rock fans will find these cupcakes delightful.

Once again, I'm just including this to pander. Because I'm not familiar with Fraggle Rock which aired in the 1980s.

Once again, I’m just including this to pander. Because I’m not familiar with Fraggle Rock which aired in the 1980s.

58. For Sesame Street fans, a cake like this is simply whimsical.

Of course, this isn't a cake you'd see at most kids' birthdays. Unless their parents are in the 1%.

Of course, this isn’t a cake you’d see at most kids’ birthdays. Unless their parents are in the 1%.

59. These Kermit and Fozzie lunches are great midday delights.

Nice that Kermit's has a rainbow for "Rainbow Connection." Fozzie's is barely recognizable.

Nice that Kermit’s has a rainbow for “Rainbow Connection.” Fozzie’s is barely recognizable.

60. Grace your dessert platter with this Ernie and Bert bed cake.

Boy, would some people on the Christian Right go nuts on this one. Though Bert and Ernie usually sleep in separate beds.

Boy, would some people on the Christian Right go nuts on this one. Though Bert and Ernie usually sleep in separate twin beds with their names on them.

61. Wake up in the morning to some Kermit pancakes.

Doesn't necessarily resemble Kermit. But, hey, it's not easy being green.

Doesn’t necessarily resemble Kermit. But, hey, it’s not easy being green.

62. For a more Latin flair, try a Kermit quesadilla.

However, if you live in the US, proceed to try one with caution south of the border. Since it might make you turn green. No offense, Mexico.

However, if you live in the US, proceed to try one with caution south of the border. Since it might make you turn green. No offense, Mexico.

63. These Muppet cupcakes are surely just desserts.

Of course, you can't help but love these. But each cupcake is unique in its own way.

Of course, you can’t help but love these. But each cupcake is unique in its own way.

64. For baby showers, a cake with Bunsen and Beaker is none too shabby.

Though babies are much easier than any of their inventions. At least they don't have mechanical glitches that lead to Beaker getting hurt all the time.

Though babies are much easier than any of their inventions. At least they don’t have mechanical glitches that lead to Beaker getting hurt all the time.

65. Raise healthy kids with these Sesame Street fruit snacks.

Includes, Ernie, Bert, and Elmo. Not sure about Elmo having kiwi eyes. Makes him look like a loon.

Includes, Ernie, Bert, and Elmo. Not sure about Elmo having kiwi eyes. Makes him look like a loon.

66. This Elmo spaghetti is always a hit with the little ones.

Doesn't hurt that Elmo's face can be done on top of tomato sauce. Like the olive mouth.

Doesn’t hurt that Elmo’s face can be done on top of tomato sauce. Like the olive mouth.

67. This Kermit bento lunch is fit for any amphibian.

Includes Kermit's face on an apple as well as some pasta for the background. Not to mention, cheese.

Includes Kermit’s face on an apple as well as some pasta for the background. Not to mention, cheese.

68. These Muppet cookies each have a different color.

Sure they may be professionally made. But each has some degree of character. Like the Swedish Chef's having a food border.

Sure they may be professionally made. But each has some degree of character. Like the Swedish Chef’s having a food border.

69. These Ernie and Bert cake pops simply belong together.

Yet, both seem to have noses the same color as their skin. On the show Bert has an orange nose while Ernie has a red one.

Yet, both seem to have noses the same color as their skin. On the show Bert has an orange nose while Ernie has a red one.

70. No one can resist these delectable Sesame Street cupcakes.

Almost each of these has an Oreo mouth. Included are Oscar, the Count, Bert, Ernie, Elmo, Cookie Monster, and Big Bird.

Almost each of these has an Oreo mouth. Included are Oscar, the Count, Bert, Ernie, Elmo, Cookie Monster, and Big Bird.

71. This Bunsen and Beaker cake is a work of genius.

After all, it includes elements from the Periodic Table as well as atomic structures. Perfect for science geeks.

After all, it includes elements from the Periodic Table as well as atomic structures. Perfect for science geeks.

72. This Muppet cake is a strip of many colors.

Well, it's not exactly a rainbow. But it's quite cool to behold.

Well, it’s not exactly a rainbow. But it’s quite cool to behold.

73. This burning Beaker cake is explosively fun.

Unless you're Beaker. Because you know what usually happens to him at Muppet Labs.

Unless you’re Beaker. Because you know what usually happens to him at Muppet Labs.

74. With a cake like this, you’d almost think Kermit is carried away.

Well, it features Kermit with a bunch of other Muppet balloons. By the way, there's a 3D version of this one.

Well, it features Kermit with a bunch of other Muppet balloons. By the way, there’s a 3D version of this one.

75. Seemed like something spilled on this cake.

This one might be a wedding cake from how I can tell Kermit and Miss Piggy are dressed. Also, what's with the strawberries.

This one might be a wedding cake from how I can tell Kermit and Miss Piggy are dressed. Also, what’s with the strawberries?

76. These Cookie Monster cake pops should make a fine addition to any dessert platter.

Like how these have a cookie stuck in his mouth. That's just so perfect.

Like how these have a cookie stuck in his mouth. That’s just so perfect.

77. For Muppet cakes, you might consider a customized option.

After all, this Muppet girl is just a Muppet girl. Don't remember seeing her from any Jim Henson franchise.

After all, this Muppet girl is just a Muppet girl. Don’t remember seeing her from any Jim Henson franchise.

78. This Muppet Rushmore cake seems almost set in stone.

Well, it's a Muppet Mount Rushmore one. Never seen anything like that before.

Well, it’s a Muppet Mount Rushmore one. Never seen anything like that before.

79. A cake like this is bound to take anyone to the air.

You see I was right about the 3D version. But I'm not sure how making a cake like this is plausible.

You see I was right about the 3D version. But I’m not sure how making a cake like this is plausible.

80. For Sesame Street parties, you can’t go wrong with Oscar’s trash cans.

It's basically chocolate pudding with Oreos on top. Still, these are very creative if you ask me.

It’s basically chocolate pudding with Oreos on top. Still, these are very creative if you ask me.

81. This Big Bird lunch is anything to chirp about.

Best served with a birdseed milkshake as Big Bird would've preferred. Cute.

Best served with a birdseed milkshake as Big Bird would’ve preferred. Cute.

82. Grace your dessert platter with these unique Sesame Street cupcakes.

Another set of expensive pastries done by professionals. But their icing sculptures are worth noting.

Another set of expensive pastries done by professionals. But their icing sculptures are worth noting.

83. Seems like Kermit’s notes have character.

Took me awhile to figure this cake out. But once I realized these were music notes, it seemed to make more sense.

Took me awhile to figure this cake out. But once I realized these were music notes, it seemed to make more sense.

84. These food faces of Bert and Ernie bring all smiles.

Not sure if these are for eating. But I like how Bert has the top of a pineapple as hair. The licorice lips are also clever.

Not sure if these are for eating. But I like how Bert has the top of a pineapple as hair. The licorice lips are also clever.

85. This Cookie Monster Macaroon will make you go nom, nom, nom, nom, nom.

Has sugar sprinkles on for super fuzziness. Like how he has the cookie in his mouth. Brilliant.

Has sugar sprinkles on for super fuzziness. Like how he has the cookie in his mouth. Brilliant.

86. With these Kermit cupcakes, the eyes have it.

If you want Constantine cupcakes, all you have to do is put a chocolate chip on it. Still, like the marshmallow frog eyes.

If you want Constantine cupcakes, all you have to do is put a chocolate chip on it. Still, like the marshmallow frog eyes.

87. Even Cookie Monster would adore these Sesame Street cookies.

Yes, they may be made from a bakery. But they have letters and numbers as well as characters. These are adorable.

Yes, they may be made from a bakery. But they have letters and numbers as well as characters. These are adorable.

88. If you’re more into chocolate, these Sesame Street brownie bites should do nicely.

Includes Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Bert. And each brownie has its own cup.

Includes Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Bert. And each brownie has its own cup.

89. A Beaker cookie pop is a treat for the future.

Well, he has nice pretzel hair in orange icing. Not sure what the cookie is underneath.

Well, he has nice pretzel hair in orange icing. Not sure what the cookie is underneath.

90. If you like Cookie Monster, then you’ll like these Oreos.

These consist of a cookie covered in icing eating another cookie. What more can you ask for. Love it.

These consist of a cookie covered in icing eating another cookie. What more can you ask for. Love it.

91. Don’t look now, but Cookie Monster is eating the cookie cake!

Don't worry, this is part of the cake. However, if it was real, Cookie Monster would probably reduce it to crumbs.

Don’t worry, this is part of the cake. However, if it was real, Cookie Monster would probably reduce it to crumbs.

92. This Kermit fruit tray gives you a healthy rainbow connection.

Since he's the one who sings about rainbows in the Muppet Movie. But his head always has to be in the center.

Since he’s the one who sings about rainbows in the Muppet Movie. But his head always has to be in the center.

93. If you like fuzzy red monsters, then you’ll adore this Elmo cake.

Even has Elmo near the presents. Certainly a birthday cake for a little kid. So cute.

Even has Elmo near the presents. Certainly a birthday cake for a little kid. So cute.

94. This Sesame Street cake comes stacked.

Has Cookie Monster, Big Bird, and Elmo tiers. But Oscar the Grouch is on top.

Has Cookie Monster, Big Bird, and Elmo tiers. But Oscar the Grouch is on top.

95. This Big Bird cake will surely have you tickled yellow.

Well, Big Bird is the face of Sesame Street. Yet, here he is with his legs spread out to wish someone a happy birthday.

Well, Big Bird is the face of Sesame Street. Yet, here he is with his legs spread out to wish someone a happy birthday.

96. Speaking of Big Bird, here he is receiving a cake from Prairie Dawn.

I think this was featured in a show on the Food Network. Still, Big Bird looks so lifelike here.

I think this was featured in a show on the Food Network. Still, Big Bird looks so lifelike here.

97. Make a super birthday super great with this Super Grover cake.

Sure Super Grover doesn't beat up any bad guys or save the day. But he's super cute so that should count.

Sure Super Grover doesn’t beat up any bad guys or save the day. But he’s super cute so that should count.

98. A Miss Piggy cake should always bring out one’s inner glamorpuss.

This might be derived from a photo of her in a black dress. But yes, she's sow fabulous.

This might be derived from a photo of her in a black dress. But yes, she’s sow fabulous.

99. Animal fans would love seeing a cake of him at his drum set.

After all, Animal is the drummer for the Electric Mayhem. Though off-stage he's a real animal.

After all, Animal is the drummer for the Electric Mayhem. Though off-stage he’s a real animal.

100. For a Muppet wedding cake, the whole gang has got to be there.

Well, all the main Muppets are in the audience. Save for the Swedish Chef and the chicken. Amazing.

Well, all the main Muppets are in the audience. Save for the Swedish Chef and the chicken. Amazing.

Rainbow Connection Muppet Craft Projects

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While many Muppet fans prefer to buy their own merchandise, there are plenty of others who’d rather make their own. After all, the Muppets does have a lot of cute characters as well as cater to all ages. I mean many of these crafts are made for kids like knitted stuff toys and such. Some of them can even be decorations for parties. Of course, this crafty cover of Miss Piggy with pruning shears is a parody of Martha Stewart Living magazine. And you see how she has a shrub into a dollar sign. Yeah, you don’t see a lot of crafting on Muppets unless it pertains to creating lab concoction disasters, anything the blows up, or just to create a moment of slapstick. Because they usually aim toward comedy. Yet, I have found a lot of craft projects on Pinterest and Etsy as well as Google Images. Like I have for a lot of craft projects from several different franchises. So here I give you a treasure trove of Muppet crafts you might want make for yourself and treasure forever.

  1. Any child would have hours of fun with these Sesame Street blocks.
Includes Elmo, Cookie Monster, Big Bird, Oscar, Ernie, and the Count. And they're in all different colors. So cute.

Includes Elmo, Cookie Monster, Big Bird, Oscar, Ernie, and the Count. And they’re in all different colors. So cute.

2. No child could resist this Sesame Street chest of drawers.

Each drawer has a different Sesame Street character. And it seems that Oscar the Grouch is on the top.

Each drawer has a different Sesame Street character. And it seems that Oscar the Grouch is on the top.

3. How about a pumpkin carving of our favorite Muppet scientists Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker?

Like how they used a squash for Beaker. That's just so perfect. Might've used a melon for Bunsen Honeydew. Clever.

Like how they used a squash for Beaker. That’s just so perfect.

4. Let the light in with this Beaker suncatcher.

Now Beaker is immortalized in stain glass with that trademark expression on his face. Then again, he has a reason to be befuddled like that.

Now Beaker is immortalized in stain glass with that trademark expression on his face. Then again, he has a reason to be befuddled like that.

5. Those who love the Great Gonzo will love these earrings.

Well, I'm not sure what exactly Gonzo is supposed to be. But I think these are rather fitting for him. And they're made from clay.

Well, I’m not sure what exactly Gonzo is supposed to be. But I think these are rather fitting for him. And they’re made from clay.

6. Fans of Cookie Monster would want to keep more with this crocheted hat.

It even has cookies at the tassels, which is very fitting. And it has eyes on the top. Adorable.

It even has cookies at the tassels, which is very fitting. And it has eyes on the top. Adorable.

7. Cuddle up on the couch draped in a Muppet quilt like this.

This shows many of your favorite Muppet characters in a square pattern. And the squares are all different colors. Like the rainbow tile background.

This shows many of your favorite Muppet characters in a square pattern. And the squares are all different colors. Like the rainbow tile background.

8. This Muppet Babies wreath will melt your heart.

It's made from different deco mesh colors. And it features plush Kermit and Miss Piggy. So cute.

It’s made from different deco mesh colors. And it features plush Kermit and Miss Piggy. So cute.

9. When visiting Muppet Labs, don’t forget your parking pass.

Yes, Muppet Labs where the future is being made today. And where the healthcare benefits are truly exceptional. Seriously, why do you think Beaker works there?

Yes, Muppet Labs where the future is being made today. And where the healthcare benefits are truly exceptional. Seriously, why do you think Beaker works there?

10. There’s no better Muppet craft than an amigurumi of the late Jim Henson himself.

And here he is with a crocheted Kermit at his side. Because Kermit is his first Muppet and signature character.

And here he is with a crocheted Kermit at his side. Because Kermit is his first Muppet and signature character. Love this.

11. Reenact your favorite Sesame Street scenes with these crocheted miniature Bert and Ernie.

To be fair they have miniature crocheted figures of almost all the Muppets. Sesame Street characters included. It's just that I wanted one with more than one featured.

To be fair they have miniature crocheted figures of almost all the Muppets. Sesame Street characters included. It’s just that I wanted one with more than one featured.

12. These Muppet rocks are perfect for any garden.

Guess this features characters from Muppets Most Wanted. Because one of them looks like Kermit with a mole. So I guess that's Constantine.

Guess this features characters from Muppets Most Wanted. Because one of them looks like Kermit with a mole. So I guess that’s Constantine.

13. Nothing looks more delightful than a Cookie Monster feather wreath.

Even features the rolling eyes and chocolate chip cookies. And the feathers add to the fuzziness. So adorable.

Even features the rolling eyes and chocolate chip cookies. And the feathers add to the fuzziness. So adorable.

14. If you liked the “Manah, Manah,” you’ll like these amigurumi.

Now I have that song stuck in my head. Then again, it might be the version about Troy Polamalu I heard when I was in high school.

Now I have that song stuck in my head. Then again, it might be the version about Troy Polamalu I heard when I was in high school.

15. Make a child smile with this Elmo camera lens buddy.

Well, it might make very tiny kids smile since Elmo is very popular in that demographic. As for older kids and adults, it depends.

Well, it might make very tiny kids smile since Elmo is very popular in that demographic. As for older kids and adults, it depends.

16. This Swedish Chef amigurumi is a great crocheted kitchen companion.

Unless it's a Swedish kitchen, then he'll be a doll of contention. But come on, his kitchen scenes are so entertaining.

Unless it’s a Swedish kitchen, then he’ll be a doll of contention. But come on, his kitchen scenes are so entertaining.

17. No little one could ever resist a Sesame Street quilt like this.

Yes, I may be 26 years old with no kids. But even I thinks it's so adorable. Love the characters on it.

Yes, I may be 26 years old with no kids. But even I thinks it’s so adorable. Love the characters on it.

18. Look chic this fall with this Scooter hat.

Skeeter is the resident Muppet nerd. And while he's significant in Muppet Babies, he's not so much in the other Muppet stuff save the first movie.

Scooter is the resident Muppet nerd and backstage manager. And while he’s significant in Muppet Babies, he’s not so much in the other Muppet stuff save the first movie.

19. This Kermit bottle cap portrait is a true work of Muppet art.

Yes, this is Kermit bottle cap portrait. I know it seems a bit strange. But it's really a good representation of the most famous Muppet.

Yes, this is Kermit bottle cap portrait. I know it seems a bit strange. But it’s really a good representation of the most famous Muppet.

20. Spend hours of fun with these Muppet peg dolls.

As you can see, these are also from Muppets Most Wanted. Since it includes Walter and Constantine. Still, I like these.

As you can see, these are also from Muppets Most Wanted. Since it includes Walter and Constantine. Still, I like these.

21. For your little one’s Sesame Street birthday party, you can’t go without a personalized street sign.

This one just consists of a lamp post and a street sign. Might be made from wood. But it's charming.

This one just consists of a lamp post and a street sign. Might be made from wood. But it’s charming.

22. With a metal bucket, newspapers, and a pumpkin, this Oscar the Grouch decoration is a trashy charm.

After all Oscar lives in a trash can. So this is quite clever. Like how they used a trash can lid.

After all Oscar lives in a trash can. So this is quite clever. Like how they used a trash can lid.

23. These crocheted Fraggles are hard to resist.

May not be familiar with Fraggle Rock from the 1980s. But I know those who grew up with it will love these.

May not be familiar with Fraggle Rock from the 1980s. But I know those who grew up with it will love these.

24. Grace your front door with this tulle Cookie Monster wreath.

Like how the eyes are in different directions like Cookie Monster's. Also like the cookies at the bottom. So cute.

Like how the eyes are in different directions like Cookie Monster’s. Also like the cookies at the bottom. So cute.

25. Now your kids can color with these Sesame Street crayons.

Is Zoe supposed to be black or purple? Because she's orange on the show. Also, why is Bert green? Shouldn't that be Oscar?

Is Zoe supposed to be black or purple? Because she’s orange on the show. Also, why is Bert green? Shouldn’t that be Oscar?

26. For a child’s party, this balloon Sesame Street wreath is great for the front door.

And you can use balloons in all different colors. Of course, you won't use them for their intended purpose.

And you can use balloons in all different colors. Of course, you won’t use them for their intended purpose.

27. Keep your belongings with you in this Beaker tote.

I have to admit this is a very clever design. Hope that it doesn't make you prone to accidents though.

I have to admit this is a very clever design. Hope that it doesn’t make you prone to accidents though.

28. These earrings are meant for a real Animal fan.

However, the design seems quite delicate. And the earrings are quite heavy. Like the chains though.

However, the design seems quite delicate. And the earrings are quite heavy. Like the chains though.

29. Have endless fun learning with these Sesame Street felt finger puppets.

Includes, Ernie, Bert, Snuffy, Zoe, Oscar, Big Bird, Elmo, Cookie Monster, Grover, and Harry. Yet, each is adorable in its own way. Also, they forgot the Count.

Includes, Ernie, Bert, Snuffy, Zoe, Oscar, Big Bird, Elmo, Cookie Monster, Grover, and Harry. Yet, each is adorable in its own way. Also, they forgot the Count.

30. These wooden spoon Bunsen and Beaker are always a fine addition to the kitchen.

Though if they were real, your kitchen wouldn't be much after they were done with it. Knowing what Beaker goes through putting up with Dr. Honeydew.

Though if they were real, your kitchen wouldn’t be much after they were done with it. Knowing what Beaker goes through putting up with Dr. Honeydew.

31. Seems someone wants some cookies.

Yes, it's Cookie Monster in a jar salivating over the cookies that aren't. Just consist putting a plush Cookie in it. Easy.

Yes, it’s Cookie Monster in a jar salivating over the cookies that aren’t. Just consist putting a plush Cookie in it. Easy.

32. Style your hair with these Sesame Street hair clips.

Includes Big Bird, Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Oscar the Grouch. And each one is made from fuzzy feathers.

Includes Big Bird, Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Oscar the Grouch. And each one is made from fuzzy feathers.

33. This wreath is always warm and fuzzy like Elmo.

And like Elmo, it's red, fuzzy, and has big eyes and a nose. A perfect Elmo representation.

And like Elmo, it’s red, fuzzy, and has big eyes and a nose. A perfect Elmo representation who’s such a cute little red monster.

34. Now you can have your picture taken behind this 123 Sesame Street backdrop.

However, I'd only suggest it as a DIY to any repressed art majors. Because this seems to be painted by one.

However, I’d only suggest it as a DIY to any repressed art majors. Because this seems to be painted by one.

35. This Beaker clip holds papers together.

Speaking of paper clips, there's actually a Muppet Show sketch where Beaker had to east some. Mostly because Bunsen said they were edible and his creation. Talk about irony.

Speaking of paper clips, there’s actually a Muppet Show sketch where Beaker had to east some. Mostly because Bunsen said they were edible and his creation. Talk about irony.

36. This Fozzie Bear amigurumi will make you go “Wocka, Wocka.”

Yes, he may be a bear comedian whose jokes fall flat or are relentlessly corny. But he has a good heart.

Yes, he may be a bear comedian whose jokes fall flat or are relentlessly corny. But he has a good heart.

37. Why not put Elmo on your rainbow wreath?

I'd rather have one of Kermit since he sings, "The Rainbow Connection." But this is good enough.

I’d rather have one of Kermit since he sings, “The Rainbow Connection.” But this is good enough.

38. Didn’t know you can make a Fozzie with just 2 flower pots.

Well, small ones actually. But at least it has the hat and polka dot tie.

Well, small ones actually. But at least it has the hat and polka dot tie.

39. This fuzzy crocheted Cookie Monster is impossible to resist.

Like how he's made with fuzzy yarn which is quite fitting. Then again, Grover may be fuzzier.

Like how he’s made with fuzzy yarn which is quite fitting. Then again, Grover may be fuzzier.

40. For baby gifts, you can’t do wrong with Sesame Street crocheted rattles.

Consists of Big Bird, Oscar, Bert, Ernie, Grover, Elmo, and Cookie Monster. Yet, each is adorable in its own way.

Consists of Big Bird, Oscar, Bert, Ernie, Grover, Elmo, and Cookie Monster. Yet, each is adorable in its own way.

41. There’s nothing better to hang on your front door than this fuzzy Grover wreath.

However, if you see a bald mustached man with a blue head, you might want to reconsider. Seriously, he doesn't have much praise for Grover, especially when it comes to his serving abilities at Charlie's.

However, if you see a bald mustached man with a blue head, you might want to reconsider. Seriously, he doesn’t have much praise for Grover, especially when it comes to his serving abilities at Charlie’s.

42. There’s no glamorous amigurumi like this Miss Piggy doll.

Like how they gave this one doll hair instead of yarn. The dress isn't too shabby either.

Like how they gave this one doll hair instead of yarn. The dress isn’t too shabby either.

43. This Halloween, you can’t go wrong with Bert and Ernie pumpkin carvings.

I've actually had this picture with me for years. Nice to use it for a post like this. Like the squash noses.

I’ve actually had this picture with me for years. Nice to use it for a post like this. Like the squash noses.

44. This Sesame Street backdrop seems like a friendly neighborhood block.

They even have plush characters as decoration like Prairie Dawn, Baby Natasha, and one of the Honkers. Also like Oscar in his trash can.

They even have plush characters as decoration like Prairie Dawn, Baby Natasha, and one of the Honkers. Also like Oscar in his trash can.

45. These painted Muppet pumpkins are surely a delight.

Well, these aren't really carved but painted. Which is just as fine. And once again, Beaker is a squash.

Well, these aren’t really carved but painted. Which is just as fine. And once again, Beaker is a squash.

46. Speaking of painted pumpkins, there’s some for Sesame Street, too.

Includes Bert, Ernie, Elmo, and Cookie Monster. And they're done in the same way as the Muppet ones.

Includes Bert, Ernie, Elmo, and Cookie Monster. And they’re done in the same way as the Muppet ones.

47. This Miss Piggy mailbox is simply fabulous.

Just consists of a pig mailbox dressed as Miss Piggy. Wonder how they pulled that off.

Just consists of a pig mailbox dressed as Miss Piggy. Wonder how they pulled that off.

48. These fuzzy trees are Sesame Street party delight.

If you take off the character faces, they could be used for a Dr. Seuss themed occasion. Includes Elmo, Cookie Monster, Oscar, and Big Bird.

If you take off the character faces, they could be used for a Dr. Seuss themed occasion. Includes Elmo, Cookie Monster, Oscar, and Big Bird.

49. This fuzzy Oscar comes with his own knitted trash can.

I also like the expression on his face, too. That's just so Oscar the Grouch. And he's proud of that. Now scram!

I also like the expression on his face, too. That’s just so Oscar the Grouch. And he’s proud of that. Now scram!

50. Who can resist this fuzzy crocheted Animal?

He's all ready to drum at his set for the Electric Mayhem. Still, he can be quite unhinged offstage.

He’s all ready to drum at his set for the Electric Mayhem. Still, he can be quite unhinged offstage.

51. Keep warm in the cold with one of these crocheted Muppet beanie hats.

Each of these depicts a Muppet character you may know and love. And with close character precision.

Each of these depicts a Muppet character you may know and love. And with close character precision.

52. Grace your living room with this Muppets wood carving.

Well, it's from a tree trunk slice. But the carving is a rather cool work of art. Love it.

Well, it’s from a tree trunk slice. But the carving is a rather cool work of art. Love it.

53. If you love the Muppets, then you should love this portrait set.

Each one shows a Muppet with a color background of their complexion. Consists of 20 in all.

Each one shows a Muppet with a color background of their complexion. Consists of 20 in all.

54. Jewish Muppet fans will take well to this Kermit Hanukah wreath.

To be fair, I don't do Hanukah posts on this blog. But I think this is a wreath I couldn't pass up.

To be fair, I don’t do Hanukah posts on this blog. But I think this is a wreath I couldn’t pass up.

55. This Abby Cadabby amigurumi makes a magical crocheted fan.

Of course, she's one of quite a few major female characters on Sesame Street who's introduced to balance the show's lack of female muppet characters. Seriously, for a long time, the only major female muppet on the show was Betty Lou.

Of course, she’s one of quite a few major female characters on Sesame Street who’s introduced to balance the show’s lack of female muppet characters. Seriously, for a long time, the only major female muppet on the show was Betty Lou.

56. This rainbow Muppet picture will surely delight any fan who looks at it.

And there are 2 for each rainbow color. Most of these are from Sesame Street. But some aren't.

And there are 2 for each rainbow color. Most of these are from Sesame Street. But some aren’t.

57. Fans of Kermit will adore this Rainbow Connection tapestry.

Has a plush banjo playing Kermit on a log with swamp plants. Not to mention the rainbow embroidered lyrics.

Has a plush banjo playing Kermit on a log with swamp plants. Not to mention the rainbow embroidered lyrics.

58. A Sesame Street gift bow wreath is great for a party.

Doesn't hurt that it's in rainbow colors, too. Well, sort of. But that's beside the point.

Doesn’t hurt that it’s in rainbow colors, too. Well, sort of. But that’s beside the point.

59. If you like Grover, then you’ll adore this lovely mosaic portrait.

Hope it captures the furry blue monster who's a total screw up. Still, this is quite cute.

Hope it captures the furry blue monster who’s a total screw up. Still, this is quite cute.

60. This Rowlf sampler will help you think of a happy tune.

You know, Rowlf the Dog. Likeable enough but doesn't play as large a role in the Muppets as he used to.

You know, Rowlf the Dog. Likable enough but doesn’t play as large a role in the Muppets as he used to.

61. These Kermit booties are fit for any little tadpole.

Doesn't hurt that they have webbed feet. But they're sue to keep any pair of little feet snug regardless.

Doesn’t hurt that they have webbed feet. But they’re sue to keep any pair of little feet snug regardless.

62. Any child is sure to love this fuzzy little Elmo hat.

After all, Elmo's so adorable. Even has an opening to keep their chin warm. So cute.

After all, Elmo’s so adorable. Even has an opening to keep their chin warm. So cute.

63. This flower pot Cookie Monster jar is great for Chips Ahoy.

And I'm sure Cookie Monster will appreciate this. Then he'll take the cookies and violently eat them. As always.

And I’m sure Cookie Monster will appreciate this. Then he’ll take the cookies and violently eat them. As always.

64. Of course, there’s nothing more welcoming than a Big Bird wreath on your front door.

Well, this is certainly fitting. After all a Big Bird wreath must have yellow feathers. Since Big Bird is a large, yellow bird. But mind the beak.

Well, this is certainly fitting. After all a Big Bird wreath must have yellow feathers. Since Big Bird is a large, yellow bird. But mind the beak.

65. These Sesame Street flower decorations will be sure hit.

Of course, I don't think the flowers are real on these. Because if they were, it would have to be disposed after a while.

Of course, I don’t think the flowers are real on these. Because if they were, it would have to be disposed after a while.

66. This amigurumi Elmo will surely give you smiles.

This one has cute big eyes like the fuzzy Muppet we love. Like the little arms and legs, too.

This one has cute big eyes like the fuzzy Muppet we love. Like the little arms and legs, too.

67. This Muppet Show quilt is a real show stunner.

Features your favorite Muppet characters in each square. Of course, Statler and Waldorf don't get one since they're usually in the audience.

Features your favorite Muppet characters in each square. Of course, Statler and Waldorf don’t get one since they’re usually in the audience.

68. Keep your wine contained with this Swedish Chef bottle stopper.

Because you'll never know when you'll end up losing the cork, cork, cork. Still, this is ingenious.

Because you’ll never know when you’ll end up losing the cork, cork, cork. Still, this is ingenious.

69. These minimalist Muppet portraits are great for any nursery.

Consists of 20 in all, as far as I can see. Hope you can guess which Muppet is which.

Consists of 20 in all, as far as I can see. Hope you can guess which Muppet is which.

70. This Muppet quilt is a real colorful patchwork.

Includes characters from both the Muppets and Sesame Street. And even features numbers and letters.

Includes characters from both the Muppets and Sesame Street. And even features numbers and letters.

71. This Cookie Monster pumpkin is great for holding his favorite food.

I don't think the pumpkin is real. But I do like how it has cookies in it. So perfect.

I don’t think the pumpkin is real. But I do like how it has cookies in it. So perfect.

72. No child could resist this fuzzy Cookie Monster rug.

Not sure what to make of this because it seems like someone killed Cookie Monster and made a rug from his skin. But I do like the cookie pillows.

Not sure what to make of this because it seems like someone killed Cookie Monster and made a rug from his skin. But I do like the cookie pillows.

73. This Cookie Monster sampler goes great on any wall.

Here he is eating his cookie and spreading crumbs everywhere. Yeah, Cookie Monster isn't known for his table manners.

Here he is eating his cookie and spreading crumbs everywhere. Yeah, Cookie Monster isn’t known for his table manners.

74. A Kermit cameo always carries an air of elegance.

Yes, they actually have these at Etsy. They also have a cameo Miss Piggy hairpin, too. But I like this.

Yes, they actually have these at Etsy. They also have a cameo Miss Piggy hairpin, too. But I like this.

75. Looks like a paintbrush Beaker has just popped up.

He's probably hiding from Dr. Bunsen Honeydew who wants to use him for another experiment. But I think this is kind of clever.

He’s probably hiding from Dr. Bunsen Honeydew who wants to use him for another experiment. But I think this is kind of clever.

76. Cuddle up with amigurumi of Bert and Ernie.

One is a fussy and eccentric neat freak while the other is a gregarious slacker. But they've lived together for decades and wouldn't have it any other way.

One is a fussy and eccentric neat freak while the other is a gregarious slacker. But they’ve lived together for decades and wouldn’t have it any other way.

77. This Sesame Street yarn wreath has color corresponding with characters.

Well, this is for a little kid's party. Includes Elmo, the Count, Abby Cadabby, Cookie Monster, Oscar, Big Bird, and Zoe. So cute.

Well, this is for a little kid’s party. Includes Elmo, the Count, Abby Cadabby, Cookie Monster, Oscar, Big Bird, and Zoe. So cute.

78. Any kid would want to plant a flower in this Cookie Monster pot.

However, Cookie Monster would rather have them keep cookies instead. Because cookies don't grow on trees.

However, Cookie Monster would rather have them keep cookies instead. Because cookies don’t grow on trees.

79. This Muppets quilt will help any child learn their ABCs.

This one has the alphabet all around the border. And it has your favorite Muppets in the squares.

This one has the alphabet all around the border. And it has your favorite Muppets in the squares.

80. This Animal wreath comes with bright sunflowers.

Well, the Animal in the center of this deco mesh wreath is plush. But he certainly seems happy.

Well, the Animal in the center of this deco mesh wreath is plush. But he certainly seems happy.

81. Have fun learning with these Sesame Street peg dolls.

This one even includes Snuffy and has Big Bird actually tall. Still, I think these are adorable. Love them.

This one even includes Snuffy and has Big Bird actually tall. Still, I think these are adorable. Love them.

82. Keep your head warm this fall and winter with these Sesame Street beanie hats.

These are all made from fleece with the faces of all your favorite Sesame Street characters. So cute.

These are all made from fleece with the faces of all your favorite Sesame Street characters. So cute.

83. This wreath will show you that Miss Piggy is a bonafide star.

And yes, it has to be all shiny and sparkly. Not to mention, it's gotta have pink as Piggy likes it.

And yes, it has to be all shiny and sparkly. Not to mention, it’s gotta have pink as Piggy likes it.

84. Hope these Kermit earrings make it easy being green.

I suppose Piggy has a pair of these. If only to match with any green dress. Or to impress Kermit.

I suppose Piggy has a pair of these. If only to match with any green dress. Or to impress Kermit.

85. Snuggle on your couch with these knitted Muppets.

Includes Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Kermit. Cookie Monster even has his own cookie he's eating.

Includes Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Kermit. Cookie Monster even has his own cookie he’s eating.

86. If you love Kermit and Piggy, you’ll love this sampler.

Has the Kermit the Frog collar and a pearl necklace. Includes words from a song of one of the latest Muppet movies.

Has the Kermit the Frog collar and a pearl necklace. Includes words from a song of one of the latest Muppet movies.

87. Cuddle up with something green like this Kermit pillow.

Has the trademark Kermit face with his eyes and big smile. Not to mention, the collar.

Has the trademark Kermit face with his eyes and big smile. Not to mention, the collar.

88. This rag Big Bird wreath will give kids big smiles.

This one has a plush Big Bird in the center surrounded by rags of green, yellow, orange, an blue. Yet, he seems rather welcoming as always.

This one has a plush Big Bird in the center surrounded by rags of green, yellow, orange, an blue. Yet, he seems rather welcoming as always.

89. For Christmas, how about hang this Beaker stocking at your fireplace.

This one shows him freaking out over a lab accident. Of course, it's probably going to blow up in his face, eventually.

This one shows him freaking out over a lab accident. Of course, it’s probably going to blow up in his face, eventually.

90. Show your love for the Muppets with this bracelet.

Each bead here is made from polymer clay. But at least it has some of your favorite characters.

Each bead here is made from polymer clay. But at least it has some of your favorite characters.

91. For your wedding, these Muppet bouquets are simply sensational.

These bouquets seem to represent members of the Electric Mayhem. But the flowers are all in vibrant colors. Yes, there are Muppet themed weddings. Don't ask.

These bouquets seem to represent members of the Electric Mayhem. But the flowers are all in vibrant colors. Yes, there are Muppet themed weddings. Don’t ask.

92. For the curmudgeon in your life, you can’t go wrong with Statler and Waldorf earrings.

Because there's nothing more fashionable by wearing earrings featuring 2 heckling old guys. By the way, they were based on 2 of Jim Henson's professors who told him he wouldn't make it in puppetry.

Because there’s nothing more fashionable by wearing earrings featuring 2 heckling old guys. By the way, they were based on 2 of Jim Henson’s professors who told him he wouldn’t make it in puppetry.

93. If you like Fraggle Rock, then you’ll enjoy these finger puppets.

Well, not familiar with Fraggle Rock. But I love how these Fraggles take up the bleachers.

Well, not familiar with Fraggle Rock. But I love how these Fraggles take up the bleachers.

94. It may not be easy being green, but this crocheted Kermit will melt your heart.

Now I just had to add an amigurumi of him on this post. After all, he's the best known Muppet. This one really captures his eyes, too.

Now I just had to add an amigurumi of him on this post. After all, he’s the best known Muppet. This one really captures his eyes, too.

95. These Electric Mayhem amigurumi come crocheted.

This only has 4 of their members sans their trumpet player who you mostly don't see and Animal. But these are great.

This only has 4 of their members sans their trumpet player who you mostly don’t see and Animal. But these are great.

96. Of course, you can’t have a Muppet craft post without including an amigurumi of Big Bird.

Here he is shown with a birdseed ice cream cone. And he even has feathers. So adorable.

Here he is shown with a birdseed ice cream cone. And he even has feathers. So adorable.

97. This crocheted Cookie Monster blanket is pure delight.

Here he is eating a cookie with his crazed eyes. Sure Cookie may be a glutton but you can't help but love him.

Here he is eating a cookie with his crazed eyes. Sure Cookie may be a glutton but you can’t help but love him.

98. Hope your little girl can keep warm with these Abby Cadabby beanie and mittens.

Like they all have pink and purple pigtails. Still, it's about time Sesame Street had more female characters. Abby Cadabby was long overdue.

Like they all have pink and purple pigtails. Still, it’s about time Sesame Street had more female characters. Abby Cadabby was long overdue.

99. When it gets cold, these crocheted Sesame Street beanies sure come in handy.

Includes Grover, Cookie Monster, Oscar, Elmo, and Big Bird. And yes, each one is a gem.

Includes Grover, Cookie Monster, Oscar, Elmo, and Big Bird. And yes, each one is a gem.

100. This Grover amigurumi is made of super cuteness.

Wish I could find a Super Grover one. But sometimes you have to take what you can get.

Wish I could find a Super Grover one. But sometimes you have to take what you can get.

Moi Specialty Muppet Merchandise

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Like any great franchise, the Muppets have caused such a sensation that they ‘ve earned themselves their own merchandise line. As you see above, you might find the Miss Piggy had her own line of perfume called Moi which is kind of appropriate for her. She even had her own commercial, too. Besides, she’d find it quite complimentary to have her own line of beauty products being the consummate diva she is. But we all love her, anyway. Even though she can be a handful to Kermit and well, anybody. Nevertheless, you might find that a lot of Muppet merchandise consists of toys aimed for children, particularly from Sesame Street such as Tickle Me Elmo. Yet, you’ll find plenty of products for adults, too. Mostly because the Muppets appeal to a periphery demographic, especially since they have an audience who grew up with these memorable characters and loved them enough to introduce to their kids. The fact the Muppets tend to parody a lot of adult stuff helps. Just look at Sesame Street which has parodies of Les Miserables, Dances with Wolves, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, The King and I, The Hunger Games, and yes, even Boardwalk Empire. Now I can devote to this post to the great Muppet products but you’d probably wouldn’t want something so boring. So I decided to go with some of the crazier Muppet merch which includes demented looking toys, inappropriate products, and crap that might make you scratch your head.

  1. Sing along to your favorites with this singing Beaker.
Beaker Bot just says one thing and that's just "Meep." Though there was an online video of him singing Rick Astley.

Beaker Bot just says one thing and that’s just “Meep.” Though there was an online video of him singing Rick Astley.

2. Sign off on these Muppet checks.

Yes, there are checkbooks from other franchises, too. And it's kind of ridiculous. But the Muppets have a ton of varieties to choose from.

Yes, there are checkbooks from other franchises, too. And it’s kind of ridiculous. But the Muppets have a ton of varieties to choose from.

3. Women who adore Beaker might want to wear this bra.

This is actually from Etsy. But still, I have no idea what it inspired someone to make this. Seriously, it's kind of disturbing to say the least.

This is actually from Etsy. But still, I have no idea what it inspired someone to make this. Seriously, it’s kind of disturbing to say the least.

4. Relive the magic with this Labyrinth board game.

You know the movie where a teenage girl must travel a maze in order to rescue her baby brother after being kidnapped by David Bowie in tight pants. Yes, that's the one. Not sure what I think about this one.

You know the movie where a teenage girl must travel a maze in order to rescue her baby brother after being kidnapped by David Bowie in tight pants. Yes, that’s the one. Not sure what I think about this one.

5. Keep in touch with old friends with this Kermit the Frog candlestick phone.

Because there's nothing so charming like a remnant of obsolete technology. Seriously, you'll probably never use this. I mean we live in the cell phone age.

Because there’s nothing so charming like a remnant of obsolete technology. Seriously, you’ll probably never use this. I mean we live in the cell phone age.

6. Use the potty with Elmo with this potty seat.

Okay, I know this is for children. But yeah, toilet products like this are kind awkward in my mind.

Okay, I know this is for children. But yeah, toilet products like this are kind awkward in my mind. Now Elmo can watch you go potty.

7. To commemorate the release of Muppets Most Wanted, get your own Hotwheels Fozzie Bear Dairy Delivery Van.

Didn't Fozzie once say that a bear's natural habitat is a studebaker? So why does he have a truck?

Didn’t Fozzie once say that a bear’s natural habitat is a studebaker? So why does he have a van?

8. Now you can grow Kermit a fro with his own Chia Pet.

Sorry, seeing Kermit with a plant fro doesn't really look right. Seriously, that's kind of messed up. Why?

Sorry, seeing Kermit with a plant fro doesn’t really look right. Seriously, that’s kind of messed up. Why?

9. Take a nip with this cowboy Kermit hip flask.

Man, what a way to show a great example Kermit. Being on something people drink whiskey from and smoking a cigar. Brilliant!

Man, what a way to show a great example Kermit. Being on something people drink whiskey from and smoking a cigar. Brilliant!

10. Commemorate your favorite muppet with these collectible busts.

Yes, these are Muppet busts. I know it's crazy but these exists. You'll probably have to pay through the nose to collect them all.

Yes, these are Muppet busts. I know it’s crazy but these exists. You’ll probably have to pay through the nose to collect them all.

11. Help fix Beaker with this Operation game.

Now what's with Beaker missing a large chunk of his torso? Surely how can anyone survive that? His liver must be totally missing!

Now what’s with Beaker missing a large chunk of his torso? Surely how can anyone survive that? His liver must be totally missing!

12. Capture the disco spirit of the 1970s with this Retro Kermit doll.

From Tough Pigs: "We know what Kermit looked like in the 70s, and it certainly wasn't the love child of Don King and Barry Gibb." Another comment: "Who'd have thought you could admire Kermit's outtasite 'fro AND use him to wash dishes?"

From Tough Pigs: “We know what Kermit looked like in the 70s, and it certainly wasn’t the love child of Don King and Barry Gibb.” Another comment: “Who’d have thought you could admire Kermit’s outtasite ‘fro AND use him to wash dishes?”

13. These Albino Elmos are a great sight to behold.

Is it just me or does an all white Elmo look very creepy? Guaranteed to haunt your dreams.

Is it just me or does an all white Elmo look very creepy? Guaranteed to haunt your dreams.

14. Have lots of fun with this Sesame Street Barkley bean bag.

Barkley is supposed to be a large shaggy dog. This bean bag toy is what Barkley looks like after getting electrocuted.

Barkley is supposed to be a large shaggy dog. This bean bag toy is what Barkley looks like after getting electrocuted.

15. Make yourself look ravishing with this Muppet makeup set.

I don't know about you. But there should really be only one Muppet with their own cosmetics line. And that's Miss Piggy. So this is kind of over the top if you ask me.

I don’t know about you. But there should really be only one Muppet with their own cosmetics line. And that’s Miss Piggy. So this is kind of over the top if you ask me.

16. Scramble your eggs in the morning with your very own Big Bird egg beater.

Because there's no better toy to teach kids how to beat eggs than a traitor to his own kind. Seriously, this has Big Big committing what he'd see as infanticide. God, this is disturbing.

Because there’s no better toy to teach kids how to beat eggs than a traitor to his own kind. Seriously, this has Big Big committing what he’d see as infanticide. God, this is disturbing.

17. Always know the time with this commemorative Muppet Cuckoo Clock.

Now this decoration makes sense since the Muppet Show revolves around a theater. However, the fact it's $200 does not.

Now this decoration makes sense since the Muppet Show revolves around a theater. However, the fact it’s $200 does not.

18. There’s nothing more fun than playing Yahtzee with Kermit.

Nothing says fun like rolling dice in Kermit's disembodied head. Christ, that's just really messed up.

Nothing says fun like rolling dice in Kermit’s disembodied head. Christ, that’s just really messed up.

19. Carpenter Bert will always get the job done.

Sorry, but there's no way in hell I can see Bert in the construction business. He's a fussy, uptight neat freak with boring tastes and eccentric hobbies. I think Accountant Bert would make more sense.

Sorry, but there’s no way in hell I can see Bert in the construction business. He’s a fussy, uptight neat freak with boring tastes and eccentric hobbies. I think Accountant Bert would make more sense.

20. Collect these Mexican muppets to form a mariachi band.

Except they all seem to have maracas. And nobody knows how to play guitar. Then again, these toys are from Japan.

Except they all seem to have maracas. And nobody knows how to play guitar. Then again, these toys are from Japan.

21. Cuddle up with your very own Zoe plush.

Zoe is supposed to be a perky orange monster girl. This toy makes her seem like she's clinically depressed.

Zoe is supposed to be a perky orange monster girl. This toy makes her seem like she’s clinically depressed.

22. This Miss Piggy doll is dressed to embody her taste in fashion.

Unfortunately, this doll seems to resemble Miss Piggy if she had a drug habit. I mean look at her snout and eyes for God's sake. She seems totally high.

Unfortunately, this doll seems to resemble Miss Piggy if she had a drug habit. I mean look at her snout and eyes for God’s sake. She seems totally high.

23. Nothing’s cuter on Easter than seeing Animal hatch from an egg.

From Tough Pigs: " Disney, how many times do we have to tell you? Yosemite Sam is a Warner Brothers property."

From Tough Pigs: ” Disney, how many times do we have to tell you? Yosemite Sam is a Warner Brothers property.”

24. This Easter Fozzie Bear is only a mere lamb.

From Tough Pigs: "Yes, he still looks like Fozzie’s evil twin, but at least he’s an evil twin in a good mood. He might even be forgiven for the lamb costume. But that tie is not helpful. That is a very bad tie."

From Tough Pigs: “Yes, he still looks like Fozzie’s evil twin, but at least he’s an evil twin in a good mood. He might even be forgiven for the lamb costume. But that tie is not helpful. That is a very bad tie.”

25. How many times could even think of wanting a plush doll of the Count?

This doesn't look like the Count at all. I mean he has slicked hair and a pointy nose. From Tough Pigs: ""He looks kinda like some creepy guy you keep trying to avoid at a bar... otherwise, not so bad."

This doesn’t look like the Count at all. I mean he has slicked hair and a pointy nose. From Tough Pigs: “”He looks kinda like some creepy guy you keep trying to avoid at a bar… otherwise, not so bad.”

26. Cookie Monster is just here to clown around.

From Tough Pigs: “Finally! Donut-faced Cookie Monster has joined Cirque du Soleil! What the true fans are asking for!”

From Tough Pigs: “Finally! Donut-faced Cookie Monster has joined Cirque du Soleil! What the true fans are asking for!”

27. Make your nails shimmer with your favorite Muppet nail polish.

The Miss Piggy nail polish colors make sense. The other ones don't. Seriously, why?

The Miss Piggy nail polish colors make sense. The other ones don’t. Seriously, why?

28. Always know the time with this Kermit clock.

Now that's a really strange limb configuration. Doesn't make me feel comfortable.

Now that’s a really strange limb configuration. Doesn’t make me feel comfortable.

29. Keep your money secure with this Bert bank.

I have a lot of questions about this. First, why is Bert orange? Second why does he have that subtle look I've seen from villains in a slasher movie?

I have a lot of questions about this. First, why is Bert orange? Second why does he have that subtle look I’ve seen from villains in a slasher movie?

30. Light up with this Fraggle Rock Lighter Raver.

Not sure if this is appropriate for a family friendly franchise. Because we all know what lighters are used for. Right?

Not sure if this is appropriate for a family friendly franchise. Because we all know what lighters are used for. Right?

31. For a fine bathroom style, this Elmo toilet seat should suit you nicely.

Yes, this is an adult Elmo toilet seat. To be fair, they have these for multiple Muppets on Ebay. Elmo just had the biggest picture.

Yes, this is an adult Elmo toilet seat. To be fair, they have these for multiple Muppets on Ebay. Elmo just had the biggest picture.

32. There’s nothing cuter than seeing Elmo in an animal costume.

From Tough Pigs: "Elmo had so much fun at the furry convention, he went back the next year. So, from left to right, Elmo is a bear, a cat, and... another cat?"

From Tough Pigs: “Elmo had so much fun at the furry convention, he went back the next year. So, from left to right, Elmo is a bear, a cat, and… another cat?”

33. Wonder who’s going to win this epic banana boat race.

From Tough Pigs: "I would love to see an episode of Sesame Street where Elmo and Cookie Monster race around the Hawaiian islands on giant bananas. It would be very educational."

From Tough Pigs: “I would love to see an episode of Sesame Street where Elmo and Cookie Monster race around the Hawaiian islands on giant bananas. It would be very educational.”

34. Not sure if Cookie Monster and Elmo are cheerleading or getting ready for a fight.

From what their hand gestures suggest, it can go either way. I mean Elmo seems like he's cheering. Cookie Monster seems like he's training for a boxing match.

From what their hand gestures suggest, it can go either way. I mean Elmo seems like he’s cheering. Cookie Monster seems like he’s training for a boxing match.

35. Though Cookie Monster is not always there, at least Elmo has a doll of his special friend.

Excuse me, but does anyone realize how creepy that seems. Available in blue and caramel color.

Excuse me, but does anyone realize how creepy that seems? Available in blue and caramel color.

36. For Ernie, his rubber duckie is always his bath time friend.

From Tough Pigs: "Ernie's mouth hangs open in shock as he beholds the sight of his Rubber Duckie grown to gigantic proportions! He stares out at us, as if to say, 'How did this happen?!'" Guess I must've missed the episode about the nuclear meltdown.

From Tough Pigs: “Ernie’s mouth hangs open in shock as he beholds the sight of his Rubber Duckie grown to gigantic proportions! He stares out at us, as if to say, ‘How did this happen?!'” Guess I must’ve missed the episode about the nuclear meltdown.

37. Grace your Christmas tree with this ornament of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker.

Because nothing says Merry Christmas like making your lab assistant play Christmas tree. Wonder what can go wrong with that.

Because nothing says Merry Christmas like making your lab assistant play Christmas tree. Wonder what can go wrong with that.

38. If you love the Muppets then you’ll like these key covers.

Why do we need key covers exactly? They're not really necessary. Seriously, why?

Why do we need key covers exactly? They’re not really necessary. Seriously, why?

39. Don’t worry, Fireman Grover will be to the rescue.

Unfortunately this Grover looks more likely to start fires than to stop them. Not that regular Grover is good at stopping them either.

Unfortunately this Grover looks more likely to start fires than to stop them. Not that regular Grover is good at stopping them either.

40. If you liked The Dark Crystal, then you’ll want to wear this Skesis dress.

Seems more like a negligee that was inspired by Ron's dress robe from Goblet of Fire. Said to cost $1500 today.

Seems more like a negligee that was inspired by Ron’s dress robe from Goblet of Fire. Said to cost $1500 today.

41. Keep your files stored on this Grover USB drive.

Just don't mind that you have to pull his face apart before you plug it in. Maybe this isn't suitable for children.

Just don’t mind that you have to pull his face apart before you plug it in. Maybe this isn’t suitable for children.

42. Pay your purchases with this Dark Crystal debit card.

From Master Card, by the way. Yes, they have these from every franchise. Not sure if it's worth it.

From Master Card, by the way. Yes, they have these from every franchise. Not sure if it’s worth it.

43. If you like Godzilla and Sesame Street, these are the toys for you.

From Tough Pigs: "In case you're not sure what you're looking at, that's supposed to be Cookie Monster, Elmo, Big Bird, Oscar the Grouch, and the Count.....Most of them are obvious enough reflections of what the characters would look like if they were involved is some sort of freak accident involving radiation...."

From Tough Pigs: “In case you’re not sure what you’re looking at, that’s supposed to be Cookie Monster, Elmo, Big Bird, Oscar the Grouch, and the Count…..Most of them are obvious enough reflections of what the characters would look like if they were involved is some sort of freak accident involving radiation….”

44. Call your friends with this Kermit office phone.

Like I said before, this is an obsolete artifact from a bygone age. You will never use this. It's just a toy these days.

Like I said before, this is an obsolete artifact from a bygone age. You will never use this. It’s just a toy these days.

45. Smell swamp fresh with Kermit’s Amphibia.

Now having a fragrance for Miss Piggy makes sense. For Kermit, not so much. Also, is he sporting abs in the picture?

Now having a fragrance for Miss Piggy makes sense. For Kermit, not so much. Also, is he sporting abs in the picture?

46. Snuggle up with Magic Light Ernie and his rubber duckie.

From Tough Pigs: "This must be like one of those college-era Ernie photos he keeps buried really deep in his photo album, and God forbid Bert finds it and uploads it to Facebook.”

From Tough Pigs: “This must be like one of those college-era Ernie photos he keeps buried really deep in his photo album, and God forbid Bert finds it and uploads it to Facebook.”

47. You can always rock on with this Animal plush doll.

I think this toy got made when there was an accident with the dye at the plant while they were making the Grover plush dolls. So they decided to pass them as Animal.

I think this toy got made when there was an accident with the dye at the plant while they were making the Grover plush dolls. So they decided to pass them as Animal.

48. You can always keep your money in this Miss Piggy bank.

So this has you dropping coins through Miss Piggy's breasts? Wonder why anyone thought this would be appropriate for children?

So this has you dropping coins through Miss Piggy’s breasts? Wonder why anyone thought this would be appropriate for children?

49. There’s nothing more adorable than a plush doll of Rosita.

Poor Rosita. I didn't know she was left outside too long in a thunderstorm. Shouldn't have hid under that tree.

Poor Rosita. I didn’t know she was left outside too long in a thunderstorm. Shouldn’t have hid under that tree.

50. As we all know a Big Bird plush is a cuddly toy.

Okay, how anyone manage to make Big Bird like he's Sesame Street's neighborhood psychokiller? This is a plushie that inspires nightmares not cuddles.

Okay, how anyone manage to make Big Bird like he’s Sesame Street’s neighborhood psychokiller? This is a plushie that inspires nightmares not cuddles.

51. No toy is more fun than these Mayhem dolls of Animal and Fozzie Bear.

From Tough Pigs: "Me try Hare Krishna! Now world all make sense. Bah-bye!" Another: "These guys are at every college party I've been to, and they're always leaving with like, 12 girls! Jackasses..."

From Tough Pigs: “Me try Hare Krishna! Now world all make sense. Bah-bye!” Another: “These guys are at every college party I’ve been to, and they’re always leaving with like, 12 girls! Jackasses…”

52. A Sam the Eagle plushie is a must for any American patriot.

From Tough Pigs: "Poor Sam lost all that weight to play the part of Gandhi. Then they gave it to that hack Kingsley."

From Tough Pigs: “Poor Sam lost all that weight to play the part of Gandhi. Then they gave it to that hack Kingsley.”

53. Grace your Christmas tree with these Sesame Street angel ornaments.

From Tough Pigs: "Here we have our familiar threesome as angels up in heaven, watching over humanity from their post near the famous Heavenly Sprigs of Parsley. Part of me wonders if Chara Hiroba made these toys because they were running short on dye. ("Aw, heck, let's just put wings on 'em and call them angels!")" So does that mean Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Big Bird are?

From Tough Pigs: “Here we have our familiar threesome as angels up in heaven, watching over humanity from their post near the famous Heavenly Sprigs of Parsley. Part of me wonders if Chara Hiroba made these toys because they were running short on dye. (“Aw, heck, let’s just put wings on ’em and call them angels!”)” So does that mean Cookie Monster, Elmo, and Big Bird are?

54. All these Muppets are is just another brick in the wall.

From Tough Pigs: "And two questions come to mind: 1. What? and 2. Huuuh? Are these bricks? Could you build a house out of Cookie Monsters and Elmos and Big Birds?"

From Tough Pigs: “And two questions come to mind: 1. What? and 2. Huuuh? Are these bricks? Could you build a house out of Cookie Monsters and Elmos and Big Birds?”

55. Looks like these Sesame Street Muppets are getting froggy.

From Tough Pigs: "This is from the time Cookie, Elmo, and Big Bird tried to crash Kermit's family reunion, I guess. But where are Cookie's froggy eyes? And more importantly, would they be googly too?"

From Tough Pigs: “This is from the time Cookie, Elmo, and Big Bird tried to crash Kermit’s family reunion, I guess. But where are Cookie’s froggy eyes? And more importantly, would they be googly too?”

56. Of course, everyone would want a plushie of Guy Smiley.

Think of him as a muppetized Adrien Brody who just got struck by lightning. Or as Tough Pigs says: "What a remarkable likeness of the time Guy Smiley stuck a fork in an electrical outlet, had his nose redone, and put on just a touch of lipstick!"

Think of him as a muppetized Adrien Brody who just got struck by lightning. Or as Tough Pigs says: “What a remarkable likeness of the time Guy Smiley stuck a fork in an electrical outlet, had his nose redone, and put on just a touch of lipstick!”

57. Who wouldn’t want to snuggle with this great Gonzo?

From Tough Pigs: "You have to wonder what kind of reference material they used over at Toy Factory, if any. Gonzo has never worn an outfit even remotely like that. Are those supposed to be snow boots? Are they platform snow boots? And if it’s snow-boots weather, then why is his collar open like that? If somebody brought that toy into your house then you’d have to move."

From Tough Pigs: “You have to wonder what kind of reference material they used over at Toy Factory, if any. Gonzo has never worn an outfit even remotely like that. Are those supposed to be snow boots? Are they platform snow boots? And if it’s snow-boots weather, then why is his collar open like that? If somebody brought that toy into your house then you’d have to move.”

58. This Gonzo sugar bowl should be a charming figurine on any mantle.

From Tough Pigs: "I'm amused at the idea that Gonzo is portraying both the Mad Hatter and the Dormouse. Oh, and the town drunk."

From Tough Pigs: “I’m amused at the idea that Gonzo is portraying both the Mad Hatter and the Dormouse. Oh, and the town drunk.”

59. Behold the power of the Force with these Muppet Star Wars figurines.

Wait until Kermit finds out that Miss Piggy is his sister. That's bound to get awkward.

Wait until Kermit finds out that Miss Piggy is his sister. That’s bound to get awkward.

60. Hang this commemorative Swedish Chef ornament on your Christmas tree this year.

For nothing says Christmas like being confronted by shrimps packing heat while you're trying to boil their loved ones to death. Of course, in the Muppets, it's played for laughs.

For nothing says Christmas like being confronted by shrimps packing heat while you’re trying to boil their loved ones to death. Of course, in the Muppets, it’s played for laughs.

61. Those who like Toccata from Fraggle Rock might enjoy this plushie.

If that was a dressed up roadkill possum, I really wouldn't know the difference. I may not be familiar with Fraggle Rock. But I know ugly when I see it.

If that was a dressed up roadkill possum, I really wouldn’t know the difference. I may not be familiar with Fraggle Rock. But I know ugly when I see it.

62. Sure Oscar might be trashy but this plushie is simply adorable.

I don't think his eyes are on right. It just seems like they're in different directions. Not good.

I don’t think his eyes are on right. It just seems like they’re in different directions. Not good.

63. You can have oodles of fun with this Gonzo finger puppet.

From Tough Pigs: “If the Muppets ever do PSA’s about not sticking things in electrical outlets… this is your man.” Or getting shot from a cannon.

From Tough Pigs: “If the Muppets ever do PSA’s about not sticking things in electrical outlets… this is your man.” Or getting shot from a cannon.

64. Have endless fun with heckling these Statler and Waldorf dolls.

Apparently, they have no taste in fashion. But since they're amateur insult comics, they should enjoy these.

Apparently, they have no taste in fashion. But since they’re amateur insult comics, they should enjoy these.

65. When it comes to fashion, even Miss Piggy has her moments.

Also called, "Biker Whore Miss Piggy." From Tough Pigs: “Piggy’s sense of taste has been one of the most unfortunate casualties of the Muppets’ evolution.”

Also called, “Biker Whore Miss Piggy.” From Tough Pigs: “Piggy’s sense of taste has been one of the most unfortunate casualties of the Muppets’ evolution.”

66. Enjoy hours of fun with this Mexican Miss Piggy doll.

I think this might be a knock off. Still, seems more like Miss Piggy if she woke up hungover in a tanning booth. Or her as Snookie from Jersey Shore.

I think this might be a knock off. Still, seems more like Miss Piggy if she woke up hungover in a tanning booth. Or her as Snookie from Jersey Shore.

67. These Big Bird and Elmo tops are worth spinning for hours.

Okay, Big Bird seems quite evil in this. Elmo seems like he's been in a bad accident and has never been the same since.

Okay, Big Bird seems quite evil in this. Elmo seems like he’s been in a bad accident and has never been the same since.

68. It’s firefighter Big Bird to the rescue.

The kind of doll that gives you second thoughts about calling 911. From Tough Pigs: “The oddest thing about this doll is that Big Bird looks pissed. Has Big Bird EVER been pissed?”

The kind of doll that gives you second thoughts about calling 911. From Tough Pigs: “The oddest thing about this doll is that Big Bird looks pissed. Has Big Bird EVER been pissed?”

69. Relieve stress with this Cookie Monster squeeze toy.

Seems like combination between Cookie Monster and Jabba the Hutt. That or Cookie might have a problem.

Seems like combination between Cookie Monster and Jabba the Hutt. That or Cookie might have a problem.

70. Decorate your Muppet mantle with these French porcelain figures.

From Tough Pigs: “The challenge — and thus the educational value — of this toy is to try and guess which Muppets they’re intended to represent.”

From Tough Pigs: “The challenge — and thus the educational value — of this toy is to try and guess which Muppets they’re intended to represent.”

71. This NASCAR Bear comes Animal approved.

I don't understand the concept behind this bear. Sure it has Animal on his shirt. But what else does it have going for?

I don’t understand the concept behind this bear. Sure it has Animal on his shirt. But what else does it have going for?

72. Where else would you want to keep your pills than in this glamorous Miss Piggy pill box?

Sometimes the bejeweled pill box option doesn't always work so well. Really tacky as hell.

Sometimes the bejeweled pill box option doesn’t always work so well. Really tacky as hell.

73. Have hours of fun with the Kermit game.

From Tough Frogs: “There’s something about Kermit’s posture and expression that make me uncomfortable.” Another: “As if this weren’t disturbing enough: Does the picture show that thing VIBRATING?” Also looks like a stupid game.

From Tough Frogs: “There’s something about Kermit’s posture and expression that make me uncomfortable.” Another: “As if this weren’t disturbing enough: Does the picture show that thing VIBRATING?” Also looks like a stupid game.

74. Nobody could resist this plush Rizzo the Rat.

Kind of makes Rizzo seem like a skeevy character who'd want to cause biological warfare. But, hey, that's just my opinion.

Kind of makes Rizzo seem like a skeevy character who’d want to cause biological warfare. But, hey, that’s just my opinion. Also, that doesn’t look like Rizzo.

75. Bendy Piggy seems quite flexible.

Unfortunately, those face lifts didn't help her age gracefully. Nor did the tanning treatments.

Unfortunately, those face lifts didn’t help her age gracefully. Nor did the tanning treatments.

76. Wouldn’t you want to cuddle with this Fozzie Teddy Bear?

From Tough Pigs: “He’s completely evil. Bendy Piggy I think I could slap to her senses, but Direct Connect Fozzie wants to dump strong acids on my tissues, process my brain into canned meat, and make me eat it on Wheatables.”

From Tough Pigs: “He’s completely evil. Bendy Piggy I think I could slap to her senses, but Direct Connect Fozzie wants to dump strong acids on my tissues, process my brain into canned meat, and make me eat it on Wheatables.”

77. It’s always bubble bathtime fun with this Gonzo toy.

From Tough Pigs: “The Gonzo dolls are pretty much on an equal level of ugliness, but this one is intriguing in that it appears to represent the tragic results of Gonzo’s Chainsaw Juggling act.”

From Tough Pigs: “The Gonzo dolls are pretty much on an equal level of ugliness, but this one is intriguing in that it appears to represent the tragic results of Gonzo’s Chainsaw Juggling act.”

78. Those who like Harry from Sesame Street, this is the figurine for you.

From Tough Pigs: “Looks like Herry was in the Alaskan water when the Exxon Valdez went down.” Also, he seems to be quite pissed.

From Tough Pigs: “Looks like Herry was in the Alaskan water when the Exxon Valdez went down.” Also, he seems to be quite pissed.

79. Here we have Fozzie trying his talent in ventriloquism.

Seems like Fozzie is using the dummy to amuse the audience before he sends it on a killing spree. At least according to my interpretation.

Seems like Fozzie is using the dummy to amuse the audience before he sends it on a killing spree. At least according to my interpretation.

80. This plush Kermit and Piggy can always show what love means.

Don't look now, but I think Piggy is like, "If you touch him, I'm gonna straight up murder your ass. This frog is mine. Understand?"

Don’t look now, but I think Piggy is like, “If you touch him, I’m gonna straight up murder your ass. This frog is mine. Understand?”

81. Light up your room with these Sesame Street glow in the dark figures.

From Tough Pigs: “First there were Sesame Babies, and now Sesame Ghosts: Your favorite Sesame characters are available as angry, vengeance-seeking spirits!”

From Tough Pigs: “First there were Sesame Babies, and now Sesame Ghosts:
Your favorite Sesame characters are available as angry, vengeance-seeking spirits!”

82. This jester Animal always amuses.

From Tough Pigs: “Scooter needs to stop dragging the Electric Mayhem to the Renaissance Festival.” Yeah, I think Animal doesn't really take to the outfit that well. Also seems drunk.

From Tough Pigs: “Scooter needs to stop dragging the Electric Mayhem to the Renaissance Festival.” Yeah, I think Animal doesn’t really take to the outfit that well. Also seems drunk.

83. Keep your pencils in place with this Big Bird case.

No, that doesn't look like Big Bird. That more or less resembles Tweety Bird. And he makes me want to step on him.

No, that doesn’t look like Big Bird. That more or less resembles Tweety Bird. And he makes me want to step on him.

84. Can someone please show this Sweetums some love?

Translation: "I'd love to eat you!" From Tough Pigs: “I’d love to eat you!” “… But as a common barn owl, my diet consists primarily of moths and small rodents.”

Translation: “I’d love to eat you!” From Tough Pigs: “I’d love to eat you!”
“… But as a common barn owl, my diet consists primarily of moths and small rodents.”

85. To commemorate the Muppets’ 25th Anniversary, here’s a Jimmy Spencer bobblehead doll.

From Tough Pigs: “This isn’t ugly. It’s just from 2002, when Muppet fans were sucked into an alternate universe where we all had to pay attention to stockcar racing.” Seriously, are there Muppet fan who even watch NASCAR?

From Tough Pigs: “This isn’t ugly. It’s just from 2002, when Muppet fans were sucked into an alternate universe where we all had to pay attention to stockcar racing.” Seriously, are there Muppet fan who even watch NASCAR?

86. It’s Officer Elmo at your service.

From Tough Pigs: “Can you imagine being arrested by Elmo? Seriously. Just try to picture it.” No, that doesn't seem right. Also, he might've failed his fitness test. Must cut the donuts.

From Tough Pigs: “Can you imagine being arrested by Elmo? Seriously. Just try to picture it.” No, that doesn’t seem right. Also, he might’ve failed his fitness test. Must cut the donuts.

87. Snuggle up with these Sesame Street baby dolls.

On second thought, it be better to avoid them whenever possible. Keep them as far away from you and your children as possible. Because at night they will kill.

On second thought, it be better to avoid them whenever possible. Keep them as far away from you and your children as possible. Because at night they will kill.

88. Back up your files with this Elmo USB drive.

Why did they have to have Elmo crouch like that? And why does the drive have to be between his legs? This is wrong on so many levels.

Why did they have to have Elmo crouch like that? And why does the drive have to be between his legs? This is wrong on so many levels.

89. This Fozzie mini-bear plush is too cute not to love.

From Tough Pigs: “I see the problem… Somebody set this thing to Evil.” Don't be surprise if you see him wielding a large knife from the kitchen.

From Tough Pigs: “I see the problem… Somebody set this thing to Evil.” Don’t be surprise if you see him wielding a large knife from the kitchen.

90. Once again, another plush of Guy Smiley.

Apparently, this guy hasn't seemed like himself lately. Because that's definitely not his nose. In fact, doesn't even look like him.

Apparently, this guy hasn’t seemed like himself lately. Because that’s definitely not his nose. In fact, doesn’t even look like him.

91. Grace this little Elmo ornament on your Christmas tree.

From Muppet Mindset: "Elmo loves crack! Does baby want to have some crack? Baby wants to ask Dorothy what crack is? Baby can’t, Elmo sold Dorothy for more crack."

From Muppet Mindset: “Elmo loves crack! Does baby want to have some crack? Baby wants to ask Dorothy what crack is? Baby can’t, Elmo sold Dorothy for more crack.”

92. If you liked Muppet Babies, check out these figurines.

These little muppet babies are guaranteed to haunt your dreams. Also, why the hell is Fozzie dark? He's not.

These little muppet babies are guaranteed to haunt your dreams. Also, why the hell is Fozzie dark? He’s not.

93. So I guess that’s Bert and Ernie’s car.

And I'm sure it's falling apart and Ernie's a terrible driver. Yeah, I think it might be time it goes to the junk yard where it was made.

And I’m sure it’s falling apart and Ernie’s a terrible driver. Yeah, I think it might be time it goes to the junk yard where it was made.

94. Have hours of fun with Muppet Monopoly.

Because we all know that the Muppets are about dominating the real estate market until your friends go broke and have to bow out. Oh, wait, that was Donald Trump's business model.

Because we all know that the Muppets are about dominating the real estate market until your friends go broke and have to bow out. Oh, wait, that was Donald Trump’s business model. My mistake.

95. Didn’t know Fozzie played hockey in his spare time.

Then again, I think he might want to do with a goalie mask. On the other hand, he might not have it in him for fights or excessive profanity. Then again, he may be a great mascot for the Boston Bruins.

Then again, I think he might want to do with a goalie mask. On the other hand, he might not have it in him for fights or excessive profanity. Then again, he may be a great mascot for the Boston Bruins.

96. This Gonzo doll is one anyone would want to cuddle with.

It's said that Gonzo had done 3 years after his time at the funny farm. But he hasn't been the same since. Chicken farmers might want to beware.

It’s said that Gonzo had done 3 years after his time at the funny farm. But he hasn’t been the same since. Chicken farmers might want to beware.

97. Don’t worry, Betty Lou will put the fire out.

For some reason, this firefighter Betty Lou gives me the creeps. Not sure why.

For some reason, this firefighter Betty Lou gives me the creeps. Not sure why.

98. With this Gonzo doll, you can pretend to be Gonzo the Great.

From Tough Pigs: “Why does every Gonzo doll look like he’s just been electrocuted? (Then again, it’s Gonzo. Maybe he has.)”

From Tough Pigs: “Why does every Gonzo doll look like he’s just been electrocuted? (Then again, it’s Gonzo. Maybe he has.)”

99. What’s a better tribute to friendship than seeing Elmo as Oscar the Grouch?

From Tough Pigs: "If we ever needed proof that Elmo was a horrific alien larva, devouring his victims from the inside before bursting, hideously swollen, out of their shriveled skins... er... why did we want that proof again?"

From Tough Pigs: “If we ever needed proof that Elmo was a horrific alien larva, devouring his victims from the inside before bursting, hideously swollen, out of their shriveled skins… er… why did we want that proof again?”

100. From Muppets Most Wanted, this Kermit cologne is a fragrance for him.

Not sure if I'd want to sniff this. Still, why does Kermit have to have his own cologne? It doesn't make sense.

Not sure if I’d want to sniff this. Still, why does Kermit have to have his own cologne? It doesn’t make sense.

Sensational, Celebrational, Puppetational Muppet Costumes

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I know my last couple posts were not very happy ones. So in order to light up the mood, I thought it would be great to do some posts on the Muppets. After all, anyone who was a kid in the last 4 decades grew up with these puppets on TV and in the movies. You can see why Disney wanted to get their hands on it. I mean who can forget Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, the Electric Mayhem, Animal, Gonzo, Sweetums, Sam the Eagle, the Swedish Chef, and others? Or the cast of Sesame Street? Or Fraggle Rock? Or Labryinth? Or the Dark Crystal? Well, you might not have heard of some of these. But that’s beside the point. Yet, let’s spend some time in the puppetry world of the late Jim Henson. Yes, I know his sudden death sent a nation in mourning. Because he was such a genius who created these lovable characters in our childhood.

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The term “muppet” was coined by Henson as a marionette puppet as all the muppets were constructed. The beginnings of the Muppets can be traced all the way to the 1950s. In 1955, Henson created his first muppet Kermit the Frog who would become his signature character as well as voiced him until his sudden death in 1990. Contrary to what many people would think, Henson originally conceived the Muppets as characters aimed at an adult audience. Of course, network executives thought differently. Anyway, the same year the first Muppets would be introduced on a Washington D.C. based TV show called Sam and Friends which Henson created with his eventual wife Jane. The series was notable for being the first form of puppet media that didn’t include a physical proscenium arch within the characters were presented. Instead, Henson would utilize a natural 4-sided TV frame as the program’s theater as the viewers would already be watching. During the 1960s, the characters, notably Kermit and Rowlf the Dog appeared on several late night show skits and commercials, including The Ed Sullivan Show. Soon Rowlf would become the first Muppet with a regular network TV spot as Jimmy Dean’s sidekick. Later, Joan Cooney and Lloyd Morrisett began developing an educational TV program for kids and contracted Henson to design several characters. Produced by the Children’s Television Workshop, this show would debut as Sesame Street which received critical acclaim as the muppet characters proved vital to the program’s enduring popularity. In the 1970s, Henson would do The Land on Gorch sketches on SNL and develop a series in 1976 called The Muppet Show which was a more comedic variety show aimed more toward adults. However, the show was actually filmed in London because no American network thought it could work at the time (which was why this show aired in syndication in the US). And Henson couldn’t just go to cable. While Kermit and Rowlf would appear as regulars, it also introduced characters like Fozzie Bear, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, and Animal. The rest is history.

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Miss Piggy (dress: Zac Posen, shoes: Christian Louboutin, jewelry: Fred Leighton, hair: Kim Kimble) and Kermit the Frog (in Brooks Brothers) at the 84th Annual Academy Awards

Of course, since the Muppets have become a very popular global franchise, it’s only natural that people might want to dress like them for Halloween for a cosplay. Nevertheless, when it comes to fashion icon, there’s no Muppet who wears it like the glamorous diva Miss Piggy. You may see I have pictures of her and Kermit at the Oscars and on the cover of the Vogue magazine wedding edition. Sure she may be a pig but she always tries to dress elegantly for every occasion and takes great pains to appear glamorous. So if you’re Donald Trump, she’s probably the last woman you’d want to call a “fat ugly pig” to her face. Because she doesn’t take criticism like that very well. Not to mention, she’s very skilled in martial arts and won’t hesitate to use them. Then again, seeing her karate chop Trump actually seems very satisfying to me. Really, you don’t want to piss her off. Anyway, in this post, I give you a treasure trove of great muppet costumes for your reading pleasure. And I’m sure Piggy will be flattered. She better be for I don’t want to be on the receiving end of her karate chop.

  1. As we know from the Muppets, every frog must have his pig.
Luckily for Piggy, she'll see plenty of costumes of moi on this post. So will Kermie who's in a skin tight green body suit.

Luckily for Piggy, she’ll see plenty of costumes of moi on this post. So will Kermie who’s in a skin tight green body suit.

2. These pooches come all the way from the street.

By that, I mean Sesame Street. One dog is dressed as Oscar the Grouch. The other as Cookie Monster.

By that, I mean Sesame Street. One dog is dressed as Oscar the Grouch. The other as Cookie Monster.

3. While Miss Piggy traditionally wears pink, she can also look chic in black.

Well, if you have a nice dress in your closet, then a Miss Piggy costume won't be hard to do. I mean costume snouts and ears don't cost much.

Well, if you have a nice dress in your closet, then a Miss Piggy costume won’t be hard to do. I mean costume snouts and ears don’t cost much.

4. Pepe the King Prawn never lets a crabby day get to him.

He's one of the later Muppets who has a heavy Spanish accent. He tends to play on many Latino stereotypes. Has been around since the 1990s.

He’s one of the later Muppets who has a heavy Spanish accent. He tends to play on many Latino stereotypes. Has been around since the 1990s.

5. This Sesame Street family loves life in this part of the neighborhood.

Parents are dressed up as Ernie and Bert. Dog is Cookie Monster. Kids are Elmo and Big Bird. The look on the dad's face is priceless.

Parents are dressed up as Ernie and Bert. Dog is Cookie Monster. Kids are Elmo and Big Bird. The look on the dad’s face is priceless.

6. Big Bird always knows how to make an entrance.

Big Bird is a male which can't be disputed. Yet, a lot of the Big Bird costumes I've seen are for women. At least the adult ones. Must be the feathers.

Big Bird is a male which can’t be disputed. Yet, a lot of the Big Bird costumes I’ve seen are for women. At least the adult ones. Must be the feathers.

7. Seems like we have a visitor from another world.

Oh, those are the aliens from Sesame Street. They're the ones that go, "Yip, yip, yip, yip, yip." Seem like they're quite easy to make.

Oh, those are the aliens from Sesame Street. They’re the ones that go, “Yip, yip, yip, yip, yip.” Seem like they’re quite easy to make.

8. Just give Piggy a few moments for some last touch ups.

Unfortunately, the photographer couldn't wait. Hope it turns out well. Or else...

Unfortunately, the photographer couldn’t wait. Hope it turns out well. Or else…

9. For fairy muppets on Sesame Street, young girls take to Abby Cadabby.

For the record, I'm not familiar with Abby Cadabby. I guess she's a magical fairy with purple hair. Still, this is cute.

For the record, I’m not familiar with Abby Cadabby. I guess she’s a magical fairy with purple hair. Still, this is cute.

10. Guess Kermie and Piggy are going a bit formal.

Well, Kermie is a least wearing pants and a jacket. Piggy dons a red dress with a feather boa and tiara.

Well, Kermie is a least wearing pants and a jacket. Piggy dons a red dress with a feather boa and tiara.

11. Now that’s what I call a well-dressed Animal.

Okay, his pants are shredded and holed up. But for someone like Animal, this is as good as it's going to get.

Okay, his pants are shredded and holed up. But for someone like Animal, this is as good as it’s going to get.

12. Hey, girl, I think you might want to scram from this grouch.

Yes, that's Oscar the Grouch all right. Basically someone who likes to be moody just for the heck of it. Sometimes it's best to scram.

Yes, that’s Oscar the Grouch all right. Basically someone who likes to be moody just for the heck of it. Sometimes it’s best to scram.

13. Miss Piggy is always very protective of her little Kermie.

This is a mother-baby Kermie and Piggy costume. And yes, it's adorable. Love it.

This is a mother-baby Kermie and Piggy costume. And yes, it’s adorable. Love it.

14. I’m sure you’ll learn your ABC’s from this family.

Like how the parents are Big Bird and Count von Count. And how the kid is Elmo. Wonder why the Count has a big head in this.

Like how the parents are Big Bird and Count von Count. And how the kid is Elmo. Wonder why the Count has a big head in this.

15. For the Muppets, their cook is a renowned chef who comes all the way from the fjords.

"Yur puurt thur lobster airn der pot firlled wit boirling watur." Guess the lobster will get the better of him. Bork, bork, bork.

“Yur puurt thur lobster airn der pot firlled wit boirling watur.” Guess the lobster will get the better of him. Bork, bork, bork.

16. Before she goes out, Miss Piggy just has to take a selfie.

Knowing how self-absorbed she could be, I can totally imagine Piggy doing this. Even dressed to the nines.

Knowing how self-absorbed she could be, I can totally imagine Piggy doing this. Even dressed to the nines.

17. That’s what I call a real party Animal.

Yes, that's Animal in his traditional look. Always with the drumsticks and broken chains as drummer for Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem.

Yes, that’s Animal in his traditional look. Always with the drumsticks and broken chains as drummer for Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem.

18. Didn’t know the Yip-Yip aliens had families.

Then again, these costumes are probably among the easiest to make. So why not do one for the whole family?

Then again, these costumes are probably among the easiest to make. So why not do one for the whole family?

19. And I thought these creatures came to Earth in peace.

Actually this is a zombie version of the Yip-Yip aliens. I know the arms sticking out is stick. But what can I say? It's unique.

Actually this is a zombie version of the Yip-Yip aliens. I know the arms sticking out is stick. But what can I say? It’s unique.

20. Who can remember your favorite fuzzy blue monster Grover? You know the one from Sesame Street that dresses like a superhero and doesn’t violently eat cookies.

Well, sure looks like a fuzzy Grover, all right. Of course, I've heard he's a proven liability as a server in the restaurant business.

Well, sure looks like a fuzzy Grover, all right. Of course, I’ve heard he’s a proven liability as a server in the restaurant business.

21. Seems like Bert and Ernie have returned from a Hawaiian vacation.

Yet, they wear their shirts over their regular sweaters. Doesn't really look right. Like Elmo and Grover though.

Yet, they wear their shirts over their regular sweaters. Doesn’t really look right. Like Elmo and Grover though.

22. This little diva knows where to put pearls before swine.

In Miss Piggy's case, the pearls go on swine. And so do feather boas. So cute.

In Miss Piggy’s case, the pearls go on swine. And so do feather boas. So cute.

23. Don’t be surprised if he’s a little grouchy at the moment.

This baby Oscar is prone to get cranky once in awhile. But like he has a plastic can that says, "Scram."

This baby Oscar is prone to get cranky once in awhile. But like he has a plastic can that says, “Scram.”

24. Don’t mind these old guys, they’re always bashing the show.

As you can see, this is a group costume of Statler and Waldorf in paper mache. They're the Muppets' resident hecklers.

As you can see, this is a group costume of Statler and Waldorf in paper mache. They’re the Muppets’ resident hecklers.

25. Today’s special: Swedish chicken.

You may not know this, but the Swedish Chef doesn't get a great impression in Sweden. Mostly because Swedes think he doesn't sound Swedish and get sick of being asked about him.

You may not know this, but the Swedish Chef doesn’t get a great impression in Sweden. Mostly because Swedes think he doesn’t sound Swedish and get sick of being asked about him.

26. Here we come to the costume of the guy who started it all.

I think this is based on a photo of Jim Henson with Kermit in the 1970s. Still, love the little boy's beard.

I think this is based on a photo of Jim Henson with Kermit in the 1970s. Still, love the little boy’s beard.

27. Sometimes being a large bird has its moments.

I wonder how often how many times people clean up after Big Bird when he visits them. Because he probably sheds a lot of yellow feathers. Still, this one is brilliant.

I wonder how often how many times people clean up after Big Bird when he visits them. Because he probably sheds a lot of yellow feathers. Still, this one is brilliant.

28. If you want to get to Sesame Street, ask them.

Yes, this is another Sesame Street family. But the costumes look different. Like how the dad is Oscar the Grouch.

Yes, this is another Sesame Street family. But the costumes look different. Like how the dad is Oscar the Grouch.

29. This baby diva always has to have the best pink dress.

Yes, Miss Piggy brings out the diva in even the smallest among us. This dress is great. So cute.

Yes, Miss Piggy brings out the diva in even the smallest among us. This dress is great. So cute.

30. Doing the latest scientific research at Muppet Labs are Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and his trusted assistant Beaker.

As you know, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew is well-meaning but often uses Beaker as a guinea pig in his experiments. It's a wonder Beaker doesn't end up in the emergency room.

As you know, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew is well-meaning but often uses Beaker as a guinea pig in his experiments. It’s a wonder Beaker doesn’t end up in the emergency room.

31. You see, a pig can look fabulous in outer space.

This is Miss Piggy dressed in her Space Pigs sketch outfit. Must've been a regular feature for the show.

This is Miss Piggy dressed in her Space Pigs sketch outfit. Must’ve been a regular feature for the show.

32. “Presenting the further adventures of everybody’s favorite hero. A man who is faster than lightning, stronger than steel, smarter than a speeding bullet. It’s… SUPERGROVER!”

"And I am cute, too!" Still, he's more of a parody of Superman. And Super Grover doesn't really do much of anything other than dig himself into a hole.

“And I am cute, too!” Still, he’s more of a parody of Superman. And Super Grover doesn’t really do much of anything other than dig himself into a hole.

33. Even big birds had to start out small.

This girl in her Big Bird costume looks like a little chick of yellow fluff. Love her little orange shoes though. So cute.

This girl in her Big Bird costume looks like a little chick of yellow fluff. Love her little orange shoes though. So cute.

34. Seems like somebody likes things to be a little trashy.

You have to like the dad's costume. His baby may be Oscar the Grouch. But he's the trashcan who holds him in.

You have to like the dad’s costume. His baby may be Oscar the Grouch. But he’s the trashcan who holds him in.

35. There’s nobody who embodies the spirit of America like Sam the Eagle.

This more of a minimalist Sam the Eagle costume design. But at any level it works beautifully.

This more of a minimalist Sam the Eagle costume design. But at any level it works beautifully.

36. For the Cookie Monster, C is for cookies, chocolate chip. M is for milk.

Now this is ingenious. Like how the mom is in white and covered in cookies. Baby Cookie Monster can't resist.

Now this is ingenious. Like how the mom is in white and covered in cookies. Baby Cookie Monster can’t resist.

37. This little grouch always sits in his can.

This is a clever Oscar the Grouch costume. Yes, I know I have a few of these. But I really like this one. Makes him seem like a Christmas tree in a trash can.

This is a clever Oscar the Grouch costume. Yes, I know I have a few of these. But I really like this one. Makes him seem like a Christmas tree in a trash can.

38. This little Cookie Monster always thinks is C is for cookie and that’s good enough for him. Or her.

And unlike what Cookie Monster does in the show, he's eating with restraint. Still, the costume is so fuzzy.

And unlike what Cookie Monster does in the show, he’s eating with restraint. Still, the costume is so fuzzy.

39. Seems this guy is proud of his little frog puppet.

Well, this is a father-child Jim Henson and Kermit the Frog costume. This Jim is wearing a sweater over a collar shirt. So adorable.

Well, this is a father-child Jim Henson and Kermit the Frog costume. This Jim is wearing a sweater over a collar shirt. So adorable.

40. You haven’t heard great music until you listen to Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem.

This group basically consists of a homage from 1960s and 1970s rock groups. Of course, everyone knows Animal. Yet, I'm not sure if Rowlf is because I don't remember seeing him. But he's a musician so who cares.

This group basically consists of a homage from 1960s and 1970s rock groups. Of course, everyone knows Animal. Yet, I’m not sure if Rowlf is because I don’t remember seeing him. But he’s a musician so who cares.

41. This baby Big Bird barely fits into the stroller.

Well, at least that looks more like Big Bird than a lot of costumes I've seen. Like the yellow feathers and orange leggings.

Well, at least that looks more like Big Bird than a lot of costumes I’ve seen. Like the yellow feathers and orange leggings.

42. Zoe always tries to be as sweet as can be.

Zoe is a girly orange monster on Sesame Street from the 1990s. She's known for her pink and purple bows. Sure she doesn't wear shirt or necklace. But this is cute.

Zoe is a girly orange monster on Sesame Street from the 1990s. She’s known for her pink and purple bows. Sure she doesn’t wear shirt or necklace. But this is cute.

43. Looks like Beaker just took a selfie.

I know he doesn't look happy in this picture. But he always looks befuddled. Then again, he's constantly being burned up. Meep, meep.

I know he doesn’t look happy in this picture. But he always looks befuddled. Then again, he’s constantly being burned up. Meep, meep.

44. What better place to pose for Bert than Ernie than in the bath tub.

Like those Bert and Ernie heads. Of course, that doesn't stop people from thinking they're more than friends.

Like those Bert and Ernie heads. Of course, that doesn’t stop people from thinking they’re more than friends like the New Yorker.

45. For this monster, this chocolate chip cookie is good enough to eat.

Hey, I've seen couple's costumes where it's the other way around. Still, I think this is quite creative and clever.

Hey, I’ve seen couple’s costumes where it’s the other way around. Still, I think this is quite creative and clever.

46. Odd to see that Camille and the Swedish Chef are on good terms.

Because they're usually not. Mostly because the Swedish Chef wants to cook her, obviously. Like the costumes though.

Because they’re usually not. Mostly because the Swedish Chef wants to cook her, obviously. Like the costumes though.

47. Cookie Monster is about to try out his new cross country skis.

Well, at least a Cookie Monster costume could keep anyone warm. Still, I guess there will be free cookies at the finish line.

Well, at least a Cookie Monster costume could keep anyone warm. Still, I guess there will be free cookies at the finish line.

48. So I guess this is Nurse Janice?

From how I see it, the the one who's wearing the costume must work in the medical field. Because Janice is the Electric Mayhem's guitarist.

From how I see it, the the one who’s wearing the costume must work in the medical field. Because Janice is the Electric Mayhem’s guitarist.

49. Zoot must be taking a break from the sax during this gig.

From what Wikipedia says, Zoot is based on a Latin jazz saxophonist Gato Barbieri. He's not known for being particularly chatty and is kind of a burnout.

From what Wikipedia says, Zoot is based on a Latin jazz saxophonist Gato Barbieri. He’s not known for being particularly chatty and is kind of a burnout.

50. Beaker is all prepped up for the Muppets’ Anti-Zombie Task Force.

For some reason, I don't normally see Beaker as a badass zombie hunter. But this is costume is clever and funny.

For some reason, I don’t normally see Beaker as a badass zombie hunter. But this is costume is clever and funny.

51. Today’s episode of Sesame Street is about the corporate tyranny of the 1%.

The letter of the day is "C" for "class warfare." The number of the day is 99 for "We are the 99%."

The letter of the day is “C” for “class warfare.” The number of the day is 99 for “We are the 99%.”

52. Guess these muppets are just lounging around for the moment.

Not sure if I'd want any of these muppets around. I mean Dr. Honeydew is always experimenting on Beaker with destructive results. The Swedish Chef chases animals to cook. Piggy is an eternal diva. And Animal well, he's kind of out-of-control.

Not sure if I’d want any of these muppets around. I mean Dr. Honeydew is always experimenting on Beaker with destructive results. The Swedish Chef chases animals to cook. Piggy is an eternal diva. And Animal well, he’s kind of out-of-control.

53. Not sure if I’d want these two around children.

Okay, I know this Bunsen and Beaker are the parents. Nevertheless, I do think the kids dressed as Piggy, Kermit, and Animal are adorable.

Okay, I know this Bunsen and Beaker are the parents. Nevertheless, I do think the kids dressed as Piggy, Kermit, and Animal are adorable.

54. When you’re Kermit the Frog, it’s not easy being green.

I wanted to get a Kermit costume picture by himself. This is a kid one I think is simply irresistible.

I wanted to get a Kermit costume picture by himself. This is a kid one I think is simply irresistible.

55. Seems like Cookie Monster had to give into temptation.

Well, at least he's not ripping the cookie into shreds and making a mess of himself. But Elmo and Big Bird aren't impressed.

Well, at least he’s not ripping the cookie into shreds and making a mess of himself. But Elmo and Big Bird aren’t impressed.

56. Creamy pink is always elegant for a romantic evening in the swamp.

Because Miss Piggy always has to look her finest. Because only the finest will do for moi.

Because Miss Piggy always has to look her finest. Because only the finest will do for moi.

57. Seems like Kermit and Piggy are ready for a night on the town.

Like how they stuck to the suits. Kermit's even wearing a nice 3 piece. Classy.

Like how they stuck to the suits. Kermit’s even wearing a nice 3 piece. Classy.

58. Looks like some of the Sesame Street gang has come out for Halloween.

Well, I have seen the photographer on Sesame Street. But I wouldn't be sure who he is. Still, like the costumes though. Clever.

Well, I have seen the photographer on Sesame Street. But I wouldn’t be sure who he is. Still, like the costumes though. Clever.

59. Presenting Agent Beaker, Private Eye.

This has Beaker not wearing his lab coat. Not sure if I'd call him a natty dress though.

This has Beaker not wearing his lab coat. Not sure if I’d call him a natty dress though.

60. This Yip-Yip aliens are surely fleeced.

Well, they're made of fleece, anyway. They're also somewhat shredded at the bottom.

Well, they’re made of fleece, anyway. They’re also somewhat shredded at the bottom.

61. Remember the two Muppets that sang the chorus to “Manah Manah?” Well, here they are.

Yeah, those are the ones. They're kind of weird looking to tell you the truth. But they'll do.

Yeah, those are the ones. They’re kind of weird looking to tell you the truth. But they’ll do.

62. Wonder what this Swedish Chef is cooking.

Well, it probably doesn't involve animals because he'd be chasing them at this time. Still, seems to be a very popular character.

Well, it probably doesn’t involve animals because he’d be chasing them at this time. Still, seems to be a very popular character.

63. Here we have Dr. Teeth and his Electric Mayhem with the full lineup.

Let me say, these guys may be from the 1970s but they're still better than bands like One Direction. Seriously.

Let me say, these guys may be from the 1970s but they’re still better than bands like One Direction. Seriously.

64. For the Electric Mayhem, we have Janice on lead guitar.

She's clearly based on Janis Joplin despite the wardrobe. But she loves to play her Les Paul.

She’s clearly based on Janis Joplin despite the wardrobe. But she loves to play her Les Paul.

65. Hope Zoe doesn’t mind being bright orange.

The pink doesn't always seem to stand out in this costume. Nevertheless, so adorable.

The pink doesn’t always seem to stand out in this costume. Nevertheless, so adorable.

66. This little Kermit is only a mere tadpole.

Yes, this little kid may be green. But he's so adorable as Jim Henson's most famous frog. So cute.

Yes, this little kid may be green. But he’s so adorable as Jim Henson’s most famous frog. So cute.

67. Sometimes a green Kermit hoodie is all you need.

On the Muppets, Kermit normally doesn't really seem to wear anything but a collar around his neck. He doesn't even wear pants.

On the Muppets, Kermit normally doesn’t really seem to wear anything but a collar around his neck. He doesn’t even wear pants.

68. Sometimes it takes a big dog to be a Big Bird.

Yes, this dog is covered in yellow feathers. Don't ask. It's just that it's playing Big Bird.

Yes, this dog is covered in yellow feathers. Don’t ask. It’s just that it’s playing Big Bird.

69. A swamp frog always likes to see his piggy girlfriend well pampered and dressed.

Of course, you kind of have to wonder about Kermit and Piggy's sex life like whether it's even possible for them to have one. I mean he's an frog. She's a pig. Neither species engage in sex the same way.

Of course, you kind of have to wonder about Kermit and Piggy’s sex life like whether it’s even possible for them to have one. I mean he’s an frog. She’s a pig. Neither species engage in sex the same way.

70. Now those really look like strange Stormtroopers to me.

Well, there's Kermit, Beaker, Animal, and Gonzo. Are probably bad shots, which is perfect for the Galactic Empire.

Well, there’s Kermit, Beaker, Animal, and Gonzo. Are probably bad shots, which is perfect for the Galactic Empire.

71. The Count is holding 2 fingers. 1, 2, two fingers. Mahahahaha.

This Count costume is brilliant. Like the purple paper mache face. I mean he counts all the time and he's still a cooler vampire than Edward Cullen from Twilight.

This Count costume is brilliant. Like the purple paper mache face. I mean he counts all the time and he’s still a cooler vampire than Edward Cullen from Twilight.

72. Guess this grouch will have to carry his own trash can.

Well, at least this one can be carried. Like how it says, "Go Away." So Oscar.

Well, at least this one can be carried. Like how it says, “Go Away.” So Oscar.

73. Okay, guys, I think it’s time we need to hide the cookie table.

Because Cookie Monster is the last guy you'd want around a cookie table at a party. Seriously, he'll demolish it.

Because Cookie Monster is the last guy you’d want around a cookie table at a party. Seriously, he’ll demolish it.

74. Not sure if you want to eat these sentient veggies.

Yes, these veggies and bag are muppets. And yes, they talk and sing. Kind of creepy if you think about it.

Yes, these veggies and bag are muppets. And yes, they talk and sing. Kind of creepy if you think about it.

75. Better for Gonzo to come than never.

Finally, I have my Gonzo who's in a suit. Known for doing crazy stuff and having relations with chicken. Consensually of course.

Finally, I have my Gonzo who’s in a suit. Known for doing crazy stuff and having relations with chicken. Consensually of course.

76. Here we have Gonzo with his one true love Camille.

You understand she's a chicken. And it seems these two are drinking and smoking at this party.

You understand she’s a chicken. And it seems these two are drinking and smoking at this party.

77. On bass for the Electric Mayhem is Sgt. Floyd Pepper.

Yes, he's certainly based on the Beatles Sgt. Pepper album cover. Yet, he's kind of a laid back hipster.

Yes, he’s certainly based on the Beatles Sgt. Pepper album cover. Yet, he’s kind of a laid back hipster.

78. The Swedish Chef is surely proud of his country.

That doesn't necessarily mean that his country is proud of him. Because he's kind of a controversial figure there.

That doesn’t necessarily mean that his country is proud of him. Because he’s kind of a controversial figure there.

79. You know him as one of the most monstrous muppets around. I give you, Sweetums.

Yes, that's Sweetums all right. Bet you didn't expect him to be a big hulking monster.

Yes, that’s Sweetums all right. Bet you didn’t expect him to be a big hulking monster.

80. Here we come to just a nice normal muppet couple.

They're just a generic muppet couple. They're not based on any muppet characters. They are their own.

They’re just a generic muppet couple. They’re not based on any muppet characters. They are their own.

81. Today the Swedish Chef is making a chocolate moose.

Yes, you read that right. He's making a chocolate moose with Hershey's. And yes, it's a big moose.

Yes, you read that right. He’s making a chocolate moose with Hershey’s. And yes, it’s a big moose.

82. Now this is a real muppet ensemble.

Well, most of them are members of the Electric Mayhem. Yet, these are just great. Love them.

Well, most of them are members of the Electric Mayhem. Yet, these are just great. Love them.

83. Seems like Statler and Waldorf are always grumpy.

Actually, they tend to get a lot of enjoyment insulting everybody. Yet, their remarks are always clever.

Actually, they tend to get a lot of enjoyment insulting everybody. Yet, their remarks are always clever.

84. Who can resist this cuddly Fozzie Bear?

Haven't had Fozzie Bear on this post. And I thought he was quite popular. Well, wokka, wokka.

Haven’t had Fozzie Bear on this post. And I thought he was quite popular. Well, wokka, wokka.

85. To be a Big Bird, you have to have big hair.

For some reason, I think this is more of a mashup costume between Big Bird and Effie Trinket. Hell, this girl almost seems like she's about to choose District 12 tributes for the Hunger Games. Like she's saying, "Primrose Everdeen."

For some reason, I think this is more of a mashup costume between Big Bird and Effie Trinket. Hell, this girl almost seems like she’s about to choose District 12 tributes for the Hunger Games. Like she’s saying, “Primrose Everdeen.”

86. This Big Bird is almost as tall as the real thing.

Wonder if this is the only guy Big Bird costume. Then again, you don't know who's in this thing.

Wonder if this is the only guy Big Bird costume. Then again, you don’t know who’s in this thing.

87. Super Grover will protect Elmo from harm.

Then again, Super Grover is a superhero who's bad at being one. Still, this mommy and baby costume is too much.

Then again, Super Grover is a superhero who’s bad at being one. Still, this mommy and baby costume is too much.

88. When Kermit wears a tux, he sweeps Piggy off her feet.

And it seems the tuxedo was the most expensive part of the Kermit costume. Love Piggy's dress, too.

And it seems the tuxedo was the most expensive part of the Kermit costume. Love Piggy’s dress, too.

89. Statler and Waldorf will always have their theater box to take with them.

These two guys don't have the distinctive Statler and Waldorf face. Also, did you know these two were named after hotels?

These two guys don’t have the distinctive Statler and Waldorf face. Also, did you know these two were named after hotels?

90. This little dog is turning into a real Animal.

Yes, it's a little dog dressed as Animal from the Electric Mayhem. He even has drums to boot.

Yes, it’s a little dog dressed as Animal from the Electric Mayhem. He even has drums to boot.

91. Not sure whether these two guys saw anything from the muppets they liked.

Then again, it kind of seems like Statler and Waldorf liked to troll the muppets. Still, like how these guys went with their real hair.

Then again, it kind of seems like Statler and Waldorf liked to troll the muppets. Still, like how these guys went with their real hair.

92. Even a small pig can be a big diva.

Well, this is a sibling pair Kermit and Miss Piggy costumes. And yes, Piggy wants the spotlight. So cute.

Well, this is a sibling pair Kermit and Miss Piggy costumes. And yes, Piggy wants the spotlight. So cute.

93. And here is Beaker stuck with a bag.

Let's hope there's not a bomb in it. Because God knows how many times he's been blown up by Bunsen Honeydew's experiments.

Let’s hope there’s not a bomb in it. Because God knows how many times he’s been blown up by Bunsen Honeydew’s experiments.

94. Seems this Sweetums is made from nothing but yarn.

Guess this takes up a lot of brown yarn. Not sure if making a Sweetums outfit is worth that much time.

Guess this takes up a lot of brown yarn. Not sure if making a Sweetums outfit is worth that much time.

95. This Cookie Monster costume comes with cookie hands.

Well, this is a homemade costume as you might see. Like how one of the cookies has a bite. So creative.

Well, this is a homemade costume as you might see. Like how one of the cookies has a bite. So creative.

96. From Sesame Street, what little kid could resist the adorable Elmo?

Because I know people would complain if I didn't include him. Since he's such an iconic character from Sesame Street and a hit with little kids.

Because I know people would complain if I didn’t include him. Since he’s such an iconic character from Sesame Street and a hit with little kids.

97. With Elmo and Big Bird, this little Abby Cadabby can’t ask for anything more.

Well, I may not know much about Abby Cadabby. But you have to like the parents' costumes in this. So adorable.

Well, I may not know much about Abby Cadabby. But you have to like the parents’ costumes in this. So adorable.

98. Elmo is even just as fuzzy when he comes in an adult size.

Yes, this is a cute costume. However, while Elmo is one of the cutest Sesame Street muppets, his Times Square counterpart is a real bastard. Or so I hear from Stephen Colbert.

Yes, this is a cute costume. However, while Elmo is one of the cutest Sesame Street muppets, his Times Square counterpart is a real bastard. Or so I hear from Stephen Colbert.

99. Seems like this grouchy father has gone to the trash.

Well, he's Oscar the Grouch. Yet, he and Cookie Monster sure have fuzzy heads.

Well, he’s Oscar the Grouch. Yet, he and Cookie Monster sure have fuzzy heads.

100. For even the smallest, Abby Cadabby can be surely magical.

Sure Abby may be a recent addition. But the dress and the little pom pom hair things are so cute. Love it.

Sure Abby may be a recent addition. But the dress and the little pom pom hair things are so cute. Love it.

The Unforgivable Sins of Fox News

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I know what I have to say is controversial but I don’t care. I’m a political liberal and I know that many people won’t agree with me on my political views (well, many people I know anyways). So it goes without saying that I don’t get my information from Fox News or rely on any source that uses it, except if it’s a fake news show on Comedy Central. I don’t hide my disgust for a so-called 24-hour “news” network which I think functions more as a right-wing propaganda machine than a proper news organization. Yet, just because I may criticize Fox News doesn’t mean that I don’t think other media outlets have problems for the state of the American media is a very sorry one indeed. It’s just that Fox News is a very special case in which the very principles of journalistic integrity like objective reporting and commentary are thrown out the window in exchange for using appeals to emotion to get their message across.

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This basically sums up what I think about Fox News. “Fox News. Fair and Balanced. Unless you have read a book or anything ever.” Yeah, that’s basically it.

Is the media biased? Well, that’s without question since all news outlets are run by humans but whether many of our TV news networks are liberally biased or not is anyone’s guess but apparently Fox News believes this. Of course, while Fox News’s motto is “Fair and Balanced,” everyone should know that it’s certainly biased toward the right and bases it’s whole existence on being the Republican Party’s mouthpiece (though claiming they’re an unbiased primary source of information) when most news outlets are just out to attract viewers and sponsors as well as make a profit. Sure MSNBC may have some liberally biased programming, but Joe Scarborough has his own show there and Pat Buchanan tends to drop by sometimes. Oh, and when Fox News is owned by Rupert Murdoch’s News Corp., they’re also owned by a conglomerate called Comcast who doesn’t support net neutrality. In fact, most American media outlets are by corporate conglomerates and many have corporate sponsors who may want to use a news program to push their own agenda. And that the Republican Party has absolutely no problem attracting big corporate donors since they are the party of big business. So to be fair, while MSNBC may be a liberal version of Fox News it is only more or less left-of-center one since there is a limit to how liberal they can be yet they do have a tendency to copy some features from it. You can’t say the same with other networks who may be deemed “liberal” just because they tend to say things that Fox News disagrees with.

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Fox News has often been the butt of late night comedians especially under Jon Stewart’s tenure on The Daily Show. And with Stephen Colbert, Stewart has harshly criticized the network and reduced it to the kind of destructive joke it actually is.

Another thing which irks me about Fox News is not just their politics but how they tend to politicize everything to the point of absurdity. Look, criticizing the President, politicians you don’t agree with, or social policies are one thing. Though I may not be comfortable with Fox News putting down major demographics with hateful slander but I understand they do that to pander to a certain audience since politics and prejudices tend to go hand in hand (and history has a lot of examples of this). Sometimes it’s hard to disagree with a social issue without insulting a whole demographic (with or without intention). However, sometimes they tend to politicize things that really shouldn’t be like the Muppets. Really, the Muppets? Not only that, but they address anything they disagree with in the most juvenile way possible like yelling or screaming until the other person shuts up. While I do think people have a right to disagree with each other, I don’t think adults should attack people through utter childishness as well as inciting unreasonable anger and fear, which has created a hostile political environment where the rational thinking conservative is rarely ever seen and you can’t even disagree with one who doesn’t lash out at you. For instance, I may say rich people and corporate heads need to pay more in taxes and be held more accountable, but that doesn’t mean I hate rich people for simply being rich (I don’t). But someone who may take Fox News seriously may think otherwise.

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This graphic from Talking Points Memo shows a rough sketch about Fox News. Most of its viewers are over 65. Yet, strangely 25% of them think that everything they report is true. They’ve also been said to be more misinformed than from other stations.

Look, I know many people might be calling this blog post liberally biased or as inspired by the “liberal media” or my liberal views. But since the 24 hour cable news network’s advent in 1996, Fox News has been among the most popular and one of the most trusted sources among Americans, according to some studies. However, it’s well known that Fox News one of the most prolific conservative news outlets with a staunch loyal following. Yet, if anyone thinks I’m bashing Fox News because of their political slant, you’re sorely mistaken. In fact, it’s not just Fox’s status as a conservative news station that roils me. It’s much more than that. For its duration, Fox News has been harshly criticized not just by liberals and programs like the Daily Show and other late night shows, but also by highly regarded experts. As for me, I see Fox News as way less trustworthy than sites like Wikipedia. Seriously. As far as I am concerned, Fox News is not a legitimate news source as well as been a major disgrace to our country. And here I have a list explaining why.

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It’s no secret that Fox News is a conservative propaganda machine. But they’ve been known to mix in their conservative editorial content in their news reporting doesn’t adhere to journalistic principles. They’ve also been openly promoting Republican candidates.

  1. Political Ideologized News Coverage– Despite their slogan being “Fair and Balanced,” everyone knows that Fox News has a strong conservative political bias that it doesn’t even try to hide. We know its reputation as a strongly conservative news outlet is a major reason why their viewers tune in. Network employees noted how executives exert a degree of control over its daily reporting content. As former producer Charles Reina explains, “The roots of Fox News Channel’s day-to-day on-air bias are actual and direct. They come in the form of an executive memo distributed electronically each morning, addressing what stories will be covered and, often, suggesting how they should be covered. To the newsroom personnel responsible for the channel’s daytime programming, The Memo is the Bible. If, on any given day, you notice that the Fox anchors seem to be trying to drive a particular point home, you can bet The Memo is behind it.” However, it’s one thing for a news outlet to have a political ideological slant. Putting conservative editorializing within news stories neither fair and balanced nor ethically responsible journalism. Neither is having network executives coach reporters on how report the news. Look, I may not like how the mainstream media does journalism, but I think striving for objectivity and being open to all viewpoints are worthy media endeavors. Fox News doesn’t even try to hold up to journalistic principles and resorts to ideological based reporting. Otherwise known as propaganda. Even when Fox tries to make seem like it’s “fair and balanced” with having people like Alan Colmes on the network, the so-called “liberals” aren’t really that liberal. This opens the doorway for all other misuses in journalism.
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Fox News has relied and popularized a lot of conspiracy theories throughout its run. Here is Glenn Beck using his blackboard conspiracy theory illustrations which depict involving ACORN, Obama, and Woodrow Wilson. Yes, it’s crazy. Also, Jon Stewart would mercilessly parody this.

2. Promoting Unsubstantiated Conspiracy Theories– As a conservative political media network, Fox News has had major role in hosting, promoting, and repeating conspiracy theories. Fox News has endorsed numerous unsubstantiated claims about democratic politicians and other people they don’t like. Featured unsubstantiated claims have revolved around Obama being a Muslim, Obama not being born in the US, Hillary’s role in Benghazi, the “liberal” mainstream media, “liberal” Hollywood, 9/11 Trutherism, Hillary’s declining health, the murder of Antonin Scalia, global warming hoax, Obamacare “death panels,” the “gay agenda,” FEMA detention camps, Spongebob’s homosexuality, anchor babies, Google censoring Clinton body counts, war on Christmas, war on Christianity, anti-capitalist Muppets, gun confiscation, moon landing hoax, Planned Parenthood abortion factories, ACORN voter fraud operations, big government and unions destroying everything, and much more. They’ve even featured a lot of conspiracy theorists like Orly Taitz, Alex Jones, and many of their news hosts like Glenn Beck. Still, trying to pass off conspiracy theories as factual information is irresponsible and not becoming of any credible news organization. Because a lot of them are based on speculation, personal bias, gossip, and urban legend. And most of them have been thoroughly debunked, sometimes through a process known as simple logic as well as research supported by facts. Yet, since Fox News cares more about their conservative agenda, it all depends on whether these theories suit them.

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Fox News has reported the news by perpetuating very harmful stereotypes that pertain to race, sex, sexual orientation, religion, income, and culture. Here Obama is calling Fox News on saying how it makes an effort to suggest that poor people are sponges, leeches, and lazy. Well, turns out that Obama is right. However, their racial crime coverage is appalling, especially with how they slander Black Lives Matter.

3. Perpetuating Offensive Stereotypes– Whether it pertains to all Muslims as backward and violent religious fanatics who are all suspected terrorists by default even if they’re American, blacks as promiscuous gangbanging deadbeat dads and drug addled welfare moms, illegal border crossers having anchor babies, Hispanics as undocumented criminals, LGBT people as depraved pervs, spoiled millennial brats, poor people being unemployed moochers on welfare, and feminazis, Fox News never misses an opportunity to disparage a person they don’t like, particularly if they’re not white, rich, Christian, or male. It doesn’t help that most of their reporting staff is white. Fox’s coverage of racial crime is particularly appalling which doesn’t hesitate to include racial overtones. Not that general racial crime coverage isn’t racist because it certainly is if you watch the local news. But racial crime coverage on Fox News stands out since the racism doesn’t seem accidental or just consist of daily showings of black mugshots. In fact, Fox seems to perpetuate racial crime stereotypes with stories they choose to cover and their frequent use of racial identifiers. They even actively exploit the race angle by speculating that otherwise non-racial events are examples of racist hate crime. Case in point focuses to the network framing the murder of an Australian teen in Oklahoma as a racist hate crime by three young black men. In reality, the guy was twenty-three, the murderers were teens, one of the killers was white, and the kids admitted to killing him just for kicks. Sure it was cold-blooded murder and these kids were sick but it’s far from a racist hate crime. More like the white victim just having to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Not to mention, the local District Attorney told Greta Van Susteren there was no evidence the crime had anything to do with race. On that same program, Fox featured the murder of a white WWII veteran by two black suspects in Spokane. Though a reporter said the murder looked more like a “random beating” or “possible robbery,” Van Susteren asked whether it was racially motivated. It wasn’t. Later, Pat Buchanan would use this story to say that “racial hate crimes [are] 40 times more prevalent in the black community than the white community, and nobody talks about it” with dubious statistics to boot. Sorry, Pat, but white racial hate crime against blacks is far more prevalent. You can find that out in your American History book. But it’s not the only case Fox has tried to question whether a crime with a black killer and white victim was racially motivated. By contrast, the network would swear that George Zimmerman killed Trayvon Martin in self-defense when race certainly played a role. Even worse, Sean Hannity tried to connect Martin’s killing to the New Black Panther Party while Geraldo Rivera blamed Martin for his own death because he was wearing a hoodie. Another incidence of Fox News racism revolves Peter Doocy describing Department of Justice findings of racial bias where he emphasized that then Attorney General Eric Holder “floated the possibility” of dissolving Ferguson’s police department as a result. Steve Doocy linked the DOJ’s report and Holder’s response the shooting of two Ferguson police officers and added, “a new wave of violence comes one week after Attorney General Eric Holder vowed to dismantle that city’s police department,” questioning whether it was “what he wanted.” In a way he seems to blame Holder for the police shootings even though nobody at DOJ had any plans to dissolve Ferguson’s Police Department. No wonder Jon Stewart criticized Fox News of ignoring the realities of systematic racism those in Ferguson were protesting. Though we all know that Fox News refers Black Lives Matter as a bunch of lawless and violent thugs they’re clearly not. They even go as far as saying that BLM advocates cop-killing when the group promotes nothing of the sort. They also say that the unarmed black victims were violent thugs and that the cops’ actions were justified. Doesn’t help that the network has Bill O’Reilly commenting how life under the infamous dehumanizing institution of slavery wasn’t really that bad (newsflash: it was). It’s clear Fox News thinks that racism doesn’t exist anymore when it surely does. Let’s just say if you believe that, then you’re a racist. Look, I know that Fox might be playing to an audience that’s probably full of racists to begin with. But Fox News’ propping of offensive stereotypes has misinformed countless white viewers and made race issues much more controversial.

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This is James O’Keefe. He made a video depicting a sting on ACORN dressed up as a pimp for interviews. He showed a video that was deceptively edited to show the negative to show negative responses in an effort to conduct character assassination against the community organizing nonprofit. He’s been sued by one of the employees for defamation.

4. Creating Scandals Through Unethical Practices– Fox News has been particularly insidious in trying to demonize liberals and Democrats as well as other people they don’t like, especially Barack Obama and his administration. During the 2008 election as well as Obama’s presidency, the network has tried to smear the president as a scary black man out to get white people. They have done so through taking quotes and videos out of context as well as ramming so-called scandals down viewers’ throats no matter how twisted the story may be. When the NAACP charged the Tea Party of racism, Fox and their friends aired a two minute clip of Shirley Sherrod talking about an incident with a white farmer from decades ago who’d later become a close family friend. What she told was a story about overcoming prejudices and reconciliation. But Fox only aired part of the clip and branded it as racism. She was fired. Another insidious case concerns how Fox News demonized ACORN, an agency that works for poor and minority interests. This involved a young man named James O’Keefe who dressed up as a pimp and went to several ACORN offices asking for advice and recorded the visits. The videos were edited only to show negative responses and make it seem like O’Keefe was actually dressed as a pimp for the interviews. He has since been arrested and convicted of breaking into a government office on false pretenses. As of 2010, he’s also being sued by ACORN employee, Juan Carlos Vera for being falsely portrayed in a heavily edited video to be conspiring with O’Keefe to transport undocumented immigrants as prostitutes. Then there’s Fox News taking small clips of Reverend Jeremiah Wright’s sermons and twisting them into making him an anti-American, anti-white madman. In an impassioned speech, Wright referenced comments from former U.S. Ambassador Edward Peck on Fox News who referred to 9/11 as chickens coming home to roost, which Fox News used to make him look like an Al-Qaida supporter. In other sermons, Wright would criticize the US on several fronts including nuking Japan during WWII, the Vietnam War, support of apartheid, the Tuskegee experiment, Iran-Contra, the Iraq War, and AIDS. Save for Wright’s claim about the government starting AIDS, most of them are thoroughly backed up. Furthermore, unlike most Fox News pundits and GOP politicians, Wright is a former Marine who’s also served as a cardiopulmonary technician in the US Navy. In fact, he worked for the National Naval Medical Center in Bethesda, Maryland and was part of the medical team charged with caring for President Lyndon B. Johnson. If you need proof, there’s a photo depicting him tending to LBJ right behind an I.V. pole and standing in front of then White House Press Secretary Bill Moyers. There’s also a thank you letter. So it’s fairly pointless and shameful to attack this man’s patriotism. But you wouldn’t know that from how Fox News depicts him. What Fox News did to Sherrod, Wright, and ACORN was not journalism but deliberate attempts at character assassination through dubious means. What Fox has considerably hurt their reputations and earned them notoriety they didn’t deserve.

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With his heavily right-wing militia buddies, Cliven Bundy squared off in an aggressively anti-law enforcement standoff against federal agents. This was over that the Feds were ordered to confiscate his cattle due to his refusal to pay $1 million in grazing fees and fines for public land use. Fox News championed his cause as him standing up to big government. Never mind that Bundy was staging domestic terrorism against law enforcement. Disgraceful.

5. Defending and Glorifying Terrorists and Criminals– Now it’s one thing how Fox News denigrates minorities blacks and Latinos as criminals and Muslims as terrorists. However, if there’s a story that concerns a conservative who’s in trouble with the law, well, they might cover it quite differently. When the story about Nevada rancher Cliven Bundy’s showdown with the Feds broke, Fox News flaunted its disdain for law enforcement in order to champion him. Never mind that the Feds were there in the first place to legally confiscate his cattle because Bundy refused to pay over $1 million federal grazing fees and fines for using public land. Nor the fact the rancher was supported by heavily armed militia men and women and the stand-off was aggressively anti-law enforcement. Nor how the Southern Poverty Law Center described it as “Militia snipers lined the hilltops and overpasses with scopes trained on federal agents.” In other words, these guys basically threatened the Feds with violence. Or how the SPLC noted that these people taunted the Feds with insults denouncing various officers as a “terrorist,” “loser,” “chickenshit,” and a “fucking pussy.” Would it be rude to call Bundy an insurrectionist? How about domestic terrorist? But there you have Fox News acting as his publicist with Bill O’Reilly, Todd Starnes, and Sean Hannity calling him a hero sticking up to government overreach. For a network to treat a criminal with no respect for authority like Bundy is beyond disgusting. Luckily, Fox News got their comeuppance for their inexcusable stance when Bundy publicly remarked how blacks were better off as slaves. Another good example would be the case with George Zimmerman who fatally shot unarmed teenager Trayvon Martin in a Florida gated community. Martin was clearly a victim of racial profiling since he was on his way to visit his father and minding his own business while Zimmerman followed him. The fact Zimmerman got away with it on Florida’s infamous “Stand Your Ground” law is an utter disgrace. However, when Sean Hannity had a panel on race that included a black minister Pastor Marcus Jarvis and lawyer Eric Guster, Hannity asserted that Zimmerman was absolutely in the right for fatally shooting the black teenager. The black men were rightly pissed off. Hannity would later interview Zimmerman who’s admitted that he doesn’t regret killing Martin and that he felt it was all God’s plan. He’d later give an account that Martin had beaten him and he shot the kid out of fear for his life. Fox had clearly framed the Trayvon Martin’s murder as an act of self-defense when the actual tapes illustrate that it was not the case. Moreover, Zimmerman has had other encounters with the law such as a 2005 arrest for shoving an undercover alcohol agent, an ex-fiancee filing a restraining order against him on domestic violence, a 911 call from his estranged wife citing that he threatened her and her dad with a gun as well as punched the latter in the face, a 2013 arrest for aggravated assault with a weapon, domestic violence, battery, and criminal mischief against his girlfriend, a 2015 arrest for aggravated assault with a weapon against his ex-girlfriend, and being punched during a Gators’ game for bragging about Trayvon Martin’s murder. The fact Fox News stood by this man is appalling.

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When it comes to black activists who protest police brutality like Black Lives Matter, Fox News is always quick to portray them as violent, lawless thugs who support cop-killing. However, when it comes to right-wing and anti-government cop killers, Fox News tends to either ignore it or make them seem like isolated incidents that have nothing to do with politics. Because at Fox News, white supremacist and right-wing anti-government terrorism doesn’t exist.

6. Blatant Hypocrisy and Double Standards– Fox News has an astounding record on hypocrisy and double standards when covering the news. And the network would always take the side that best suits their conservative ideology. Over the years, the cable news channel has been quick to label protests against police brutality as lawless thugs promoting cop-killing such as the people of Black Lives Matter. Yet, when it comes to cop killings by right-wing and anti-government gunmen to deliver their warped political messages, they ignore it, say it has nothing to do with politics, or blame political and community leaders who’ve spoken out about the troubled relationship between the blacks and the police. While Fox News is quick to treat a mass shooting or bombing involving Muslims as a terrorist attack to promote radical Islam, when it comes to white supremacist and anti-government attacks, they treat them as isolated incidents having nothing to do with politics with perpetrators being portrayed as wacko lone wolves not representing any cultural or political movement. In one instance, they even treated an anti-government terrorist as a hero despite that he and his supporters staged an armed stand-off against the Feds. In reality, the rise of right-wing and anti-government domestic terrorism has become an increasing concern. And there are incidents in which such the attack had a lot to do with politics. For instance, the guy who killed worshipers at a Wisconsin Sikh Temple was a skinhead. For some reason, Fox News doesn’t believe that right-wing domestic terrorism even exists. Another example has to pertain to music and entertainment when Fox News blasted the rapper Common for setting a terrible example to young people by recording songs about killing cops (which really wasn’t the case). They also criticized Beyonce and other black recording artists for the same thing, using offensive black stereotypes no less. Meanwhile, there’s Ted Nugent who’s said very disparaging remarks about Obama and Hillary at a concert and his song “Cat Scratch Fever” contains very sexually explicit lyrics. On Fox News, he’s seen as an honored guest. Then there’s Fox News commentators criticizing on how certain women dress and liberal politicians doing morally dubious things in their personal lives. However, Fox & Friends once had Hooter Girls on their show and the network mandates their on-air talent to wear short dresses. As for conservative politicians in their private lives, well, note that they undergo damage control like labeling disgraced Republicans with a D to their names. They may even ignore the scandal entirely. Or they may even defend them. After all, you might see Newt Gingrich appear on the network from time to time. You know the former House Speaker who tried to crucify Bill Clinton over his sexual proclivities who also cheated on and later dumped two wives for getting sick. Rudy Giuliani is another familiar face. He was the former thrice-married New York City mayor who used local resources to conduct an affair with his mistress (and later Wife #3) while still married to Wife #2. Not to mention, Bill O’Reilly’s personal conduct toward women. As if these people pride themselves for not being politically correct….

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Fox News has been a major contributor to the rise in climate change denial. This despite that there’s a 97% scientific consensus that human caused climate change is real and it’s a serious problem that can’t be ignored. This has very much hindered the US from passing any real climate change policy. Clearly, whenever it comes to global warming, Fox is clearly misrepresenting the facts.

7. Misrepresenting Facts– According to a 2015 report from the Independent Journalism Review, Fox News has an astonishing 61% of claims rated Mostly False or worse compared to MSNBC with 44% and CNN with 20%. Nothing illustrates Fox News so consistently misinforming the public whenever the topic is climate change where it has disproportionally represented climate contrarian views. This despite the fact that there’s a 97% expert consensus on human-based global warming. According to a 2012 report by the Union of Concerned Scientists, 93% of Fox News’ global warming coverage was misleading. Statements identified in the report included, “…dismissals of human-caused climate change, disparaging comments about individual scientists, rejections of climate science as a body of knowledge, and cherry picking of data.” Fox News’ influence in climate change denial is extensive and undeniable. And their influence has resulted in very negative consequences for the US as well as the world. It’s well established in the scientific community that climate change is real, is manmade, is happening, and is a very serious global problem. Yet, Fox News’ endorsement of climate change denial has greatly hindered efforts to prevent climate change and adapt to a warming climate as well as undermined the public’s trust in climate science and led to low levels of public concern. Furthermore, it’s also said their distortion is a big reason why Republicans continue denying climate change. Thus, climate change has become a highly partisan and controversial issue in American politics when it shouldn’t be. This is very troubling especially since the Pentagon has ruled climate change denial as a national security. Of course, climate change isn’t the only thing Fox News lies about, but their misleading climate change coverage shows how their misrepresentation of facts has drastically hurt this country. This is inexcusable.

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In 2008, Fox News took revenge on two men from the New York Times for a so-called, “hit piece” on the network. Fox proceeded to alter their photos while superimposing their faces to a photo of a man with his poodle. This is just photoshop antics you’d see on the Daily Show. But on Fox News, this is just irresponsible.

8. Photo Manipulation– On July 2, 2008, Fox & Friends co-hosts Steve Doocy and Brian Killmeade aired photos of New York Times reporter Jacques Steinberg and TV editor Steven Reddiccliffe that appeared to have been crudely doctored in order to portray them unflatteringly. This during a discussion of a piece in a Times piece on June 28 that pointed out what Steinberg called “ominous trends” in Fox News ratings which Doocy called a “hit piece” Reddiccliffe ordered. On the show Steinberg was depicted with yellowed teeth, “his nose and chin widened, and his ears made to protrude further.” Reddiccliffe was portrayed with yellow teeth as well as “dark circles … under his eyes, and his hairline has been moved back.” The broadcast later showed an image of Steinberg’s face superimposed on a poodle while Reddiccliffe’s was over a man holding the poodle’s leash. Times editor Sam Sifton called the photo aired on Fox “disgusting” and the criticisms on its reporting a “specious and meritless claim.” The manipulation was probably no accident.

9. Video Manipulation– Fox News has a long record of selective editing, withholding content, and using video clips for their own deceptive purposes. On November 10, 2009, Sean Hannity misrepresented video footage purportedly showing crowds at a Rep. Michele Bachmann orchestrated protest. On the Daily Show, Jon Stewart showed inconsistencies in alternating shots according to sky color and tree leaves showing footage from Glenn Beck’s much larger 9/12 rally spliced in. Hannity estimated that 20,000 were in attendance. Luke Russert and the Washington Post guessed somewhere between 4,000-10,000. Stewart has also periodically accused Fox of playing video footage out of context. Another instances was when Sean Hannity played footage of Obama stating the DREAM ACT couldn’t be passed by executive order to make him seem like a hypocrite. Even though the full footage shows Obama going on to clarify the president can stop deportations. Of course, Fox News can make excuses such as when it was found the network used footage from a 2008 McCain/Palin rally for a Sarah Palin book signing at Grand Rapids, Michigan as Greg Jarrett told viewers that there was a massive turnout. Senior vice-president Michael Clemente issued a statement saying, “This was a production error in which the copy editor changed a script and didn’t alert the control room to update the video.” They also like to splice quotes such as when they aired a clip of Michelle Obama saying that she’s proud of her country now that her husband was running for president around the 2008 election. What she actually said that she’s very proud of her country.

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Fox News has been extremely sexist both in its on-screen rhetoric which show a strong opposition to women’s rights and to its female employees. For instance, Fox’s female on-air talent have to wear short skirts and can’t wear pants. And this is Andrea Tantaros who likened Fox News’ workplace culture, “like a sex-fueled, Playboy Mansion-like cult, steeped in intimidation, indecency, and misogyny.” She was also among many women at the station harassed by then CEO Roger Ailes and claimed that former Senator Scott Brown and Bill O’Reilly harassed her as well.

10. Showing No Respect for Women– Sexist stereotyping, feminazis, and Hillary Clinton comments aside, Fox News has remained a cesspool of sexism both on and off screen. Fox News isn’t necessarily in line with notions of conservative womanhood but they’re nonetheless has a legendary disdain for women. Sure they’re antagonistic to women’s rights, bemoan the rise of female breadwinners, think female brains aren’t great for business executives, shame rape victims, and that feminism is a cause of women high school teachers sexually abusing students. Yet, when it comes to notions of female wholesomeness like modesty, you can bet Fox isn’t going for that. Mostly because it’s owned by an Australian man who’d use tits to sell a newspaper. Just look at Fox’s female on-air talent who mostly have to be highly attractive and mostly blond and white as well as comparatively young or be yanked off the moment they age. They’re also required to abide to a stringent dress code consisting of sleeveless short dresses, some with cleavage revealing peekaboo cutouts (with few exceptions) or tight cleavage revealing shirts with short skirts. These are outfits that could barely pass a high school dress code and it’s definitely not something a conservative Christian would want their daughter to wear. But it’s very much implied female broadcasters are expected to use sex to sell. Then there’s the case with former Fox & Friends co-host Gretchen Carlson who played a total ditz who gets the wrong context for terms like “ignoramus” and “czar” even when she googled both terms. This despite that she’s a high school valedictorian, a Stanford graduate with high honors, a former student abroad in Oxford, and able to play Zigeunerweisen on the violin. It’s clear she was deliberately playing dumb so her viewership could see her as more identifiable and less intimidating. She’s even had to put up with a barrage of sexist jokes from her male colleagues which culminated in a 2012 incident where she walked off the set. Her demeanor sets a very terrible example to girls and projects very sexist standards on feminine behavior that many people encourage. Off-screen, it’s just as bad as former newscaster Andrea Tantaros described the workplace culture as “like a sex-fueled, Playboy Mansion-like cult, steeped in intimidation, indecency, and misogyny.” According to Tantaros, Fox News had a yearly “trunk show” where female employees are forced to dress and undress in front of staff. Workplace sexual harassment at the network is rampant. Roger Ailes has a well-known record of sexually harassing women even before he became the network’s CEO. It’s a major reason why he wasn’t offered a job in the Nixon administration despite helping Tricky Dick win in 1968. Anyway, Carlson alleged that Ailes told her, “You and I should have had a sexual relationship a long time ago, and then you’d be good and better and I’d be good and better.” This during sexual harassment meeting! He also may have told a woman “you might have to give a blowjob every once in a while” for him to help with her career. Carlson claims her contract wasn’t renewed as direct retaliation about the pervasive harassment and sexism she faced. Megyn Kelly has said Ailes has sexually harassed her as well. So has Tantaros. Yet, a lot of women at Fox News have non-disparaging clauses in their contracts and may not be able to come forward for fear they’d lose their job. Not only that, but according to Tantaros, Fox has numerous “sock puppet” accounts on its talent which are fake identities to promote or trash someone through seemingly independent blogs or social networking sites. In other words, Fox spends a lot of time looking for dirt on talent employees which they use for leaking baseless and harmful information about them in order to discredit and cause reputational harm. Thankfully, Ailes resigned and is now working for the Trump campaign. However, this doesn’t mean that Fox News’ problems with sexual harassment have necessarily gone away. Bill O’Reilly has been subject to sexual harassment, extortion, and domestic abuse allegations. And this sexual creep still has a show on the network. Let that sink in.

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The fact Fox News has a loyal following of fans yet lacks any form of class has contributed greatly to this nation’s increasingly polarized and hostile environment. Here Fox News has a headline calling Michelle Obama as Barack’s “baby mama.” Racist? Yes. Offensive? Of course. But a lot of viewers are racist and will buy it.

11. Contributing to a Hostile Political Environment– Since the advent of Fox News, the American public has become more politically polarized. Sure the rise of social media has something to do with it. But we should remember that a lot of Fox’s audience is over 65 and is less likely to have a computer or internet. Now being a conservative news station is one thing. Yet, Fox has taken it much further with supporting Republican stances and politicians without question. No matter how wrong those stances would be or how hypocritical it makes them seem. They also breaking news stories that embarrass the GOP as well as labeling prominent Republicans who’ve upset the public as Democrats. As for liberals and their causes, they’ve been unrelentingly hostile with heinous insults, slander, character smears, cheer when one of their initiatives fails, and just plain bullying. Even when it pertains to liberals standing up for basic decency and especially if they’re non-white. Case in point the Black Lives Matter movement. Since Fox has such a loyal following, these people accept their commentary as gospel. Many of them have become vociferously hostile like the Tea Party members and Trump supporters. Fox News has had a hand in perpetuating climate change denial, increasing racial tensions, increasing legislative gridlock, and others. Not to mention, recent Republican politicians have increasingly become more partisan and less willing to compromise, especially in Congress. It’s very clear that Fox News has played a role in our political dysfunction in our democratic society.

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Here is Bill O’Reilly’s producer Jesse Watters ambushing Vermont US Senator Bernie Sanders. O’Reilly sends employees to do this a lot, mainly for revenge and to humiliate his targets. This is a terrible method of journalism and is clearly an intimidation tactic.

12. Using Intimidation Tactics– Now I may have discussed some intimidation tactics on how Fox News tries to silence female employees who’ve been sexually harassed by their male bosses and colleagues. However, sexual harassment situations aren’t the only times Fox has resorted to intimidation. For a time on The O’Reilly Factor, it wasn’t unusual for Bill O’Reilly to send employees to stalk, harass, and ambush people who didn’t want to appear on his show. Or people O’Reilly doesn’t like. One major case was in 2009 when O’Reilly’s producer and crew to ambush Think Progress blogger Amanda Terkel on vacation in order to asking why she was hurting rape victims and demanding that she apologize. This was in an attempt to humiliate her and depict her as fearful, agitated, and incoherent on national TV. Why did he do this? Because Terkel was one of many people who called out the hypocrisy of O’Reilly being a speaker for It Happened to Alexa Foundation, an organization dedicated to helping rape victims. And Terkel was totally justified to call him on it. Because O’Reilly is a flat out pig who once famously said, “Now Moore, Jennifer Moore, 18, on her way to college. She was 5-foot-2, 105 pounds, wearing a miniskirt and a halter top with a bare midriff. Now, again, there you go. So every predator in the world is gonna pick that up at two in the morning. She’s walking by herself on the West Side Highway, and she gets picked up by a thug. All right. Now she’s out of her mind, drunk.” Definitely not a guy you’d want to speak in front of rape survivors. Not to mention his reputation as an uniformed, creepy, loudmouth who’s been accused of sexual harassment and domestic abuse. But camera crews to follow people in order to ambush and humiliate them is just unethical and possibly illegal. Yet, somehow O’Reilly gets away with it. Another case from 2008 centers around the legendary Bill Moyers, a former press secretary and then PBS broadcaster who refused to appear on O’Reilly’s show. Moyers made him look like a fool. Vermont US Senator Bernie Sanders was another during his presidential candidacy. Sanders blew the producer off. Others include Arianna Huffington, former Bush press secretary Scott McClellan, Tim Robbins, Jane Fonda, Sean Penn, Susan Sarandon, and even Barack Obama during his Senate days (where O’Reilly did it himself). O’Reilly has had a long record of ambushing and threatening journalists, politicians, religious officials, activists, celebrities, and even judges. O’Reilly has suggested that the “ambush journalism” conducted by his producers is limited to targeting “public servants” and stated prior to these “ambush interviews” subjects would either be asked to appear on his show or explain their actions. In reality, they’re just O’Reilly’s way of getting revenge.

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During his time on Fox News, Glenn Beck’s ridiculous madman rants gave the network high ratings. Unfortunately, it inspired 3 violent criminals to commit acts of domestic terrorism. One of whom, killed 3 cops in Pittsburgh with an AK-47. He was later fired from the network after 296 sponsors dropped him.

13. Encouraging Extremism and Violence– As I said Fox News has a horrible record of handling cases pertaining to right-wing terrorism and white-on-black crime. But it’s even more disturbing whenever Fox defends men like George Zimmerman and frame Cliven Bundy as a hero. Fox’s Bundy glorification is particularly disgraceful because it makes it seem like staging an armed militia stand-off against the Feds is perfectly okay because these domestic terrorists are standing up to big government. Uh, excuse me, but when is domestic terrorism ever acceptable? Apparently whenever the perp is a right-wing nutjob, according to Fox. It doesn’t help that Fox has had plenty of conspiracy theorists on their network. But they’ve also engaged in some rather violent rhetoric about people they don’t like. There’s Glen Beck’s saying, “To the day I die, I am going to be a progressive hunter.” Bill O’Reilly’s comments on the late Dr. George Tiller are especially awful: “[I]f I could get my hands on Tiller — well, you know. Can’t be vigilantes. Can’t do that. It’s just a figure of speech.” He repeatedly called him, “Tiller, the baby killer” and even said that Tiller was an evil man with blood on his hands who had to be stopped and that anyone who doesn’t stop him has blood on their hands as well. He said all of this shortly before the Kansas abortionist was murdered in his church. Still, publicly calling for someone’s death, abortionist or not, is unconscionable regardless of whether you’re pro-life, pro-choice, or pro-anything. Then there’s Ralph Peters on then Taliban-held Pfc. Bowe Bergdahl, “[W]e know this private is a liar; we’re not sure if he’s a deserter.” He later added that if he was a deserter, “the Taliban can save us a lot of legal hassles and legal bills.” An NBC correspondent later reported the Pentagon claimed Peters’ comments “could endanger” the captured soldier. To be fair, I know most Fox News viewers aren’t violent. And I know that Fox News never intends to inspire violence either. But knowing that a lot of Fox’s fanbase supports Donald Trump, such rhetoric could explain a lot since they probably hear it a lot and think it’s entertaining. However, that’s the problem for there may be extremist Fox News fans out there who might take those words out of context and might be inspired to carry out acts of violence. Like the right-wing terrorists that Fox News believes don’t exist. In 2010, Byron Williams traded gunfire with 10 California Highway Patrol Officers after they stopped him for erratic driving. After his arrest, Williams said he intended to start a revolution by traveling to San Francisco and killing important members of the Tides Foundation and the ACLU. He also claimed that he was inspired by Beck’s chalkboard conspiracy theories on liberal groups and described himself as a “progressive hunter.” Another avid Glenn Beck fanboy was Richard Poplawski who fired upon 5 Pittsburgh cops with an AK-47 and killed 3 of them. According to a friend, Poplawski loved Glenn Beck and was reportedly obsessed with Beck’s theories of an imminent food crisis, that paper money would soon be worthless, and that the government planned to intern dissidents in concentration camps. A third is Kenneth B. Kimberly who discussed bombing a bridge and made threatening statements about Obama. Little did he know, he was talking to an undercover federal agent who led investigators to seize 20,000 of ammunition rounds and several firearms from his property. He and other suspected militia members also gathered at his home to make grenades. Kimberly also claims to be a leader of the extreme right-wing militia called the Brotherhood of American Patriots whose mission is to “resist in the event the government started rounding up the patriots” and to stand up in the face of foreign invasions and societal breakdowns. Gives you an idea how Fox’s violent rhetoric could go.

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Bill O’Reilly’s time at Fox News has consisted of allegations of sexual harassment, extortion, domestic abuse, calling for an abortionist’s murder, and pathological lying. On that last part, O’Reilly has lied about his past as well as written a series of books based on dubious historical research. Any other reporter with a rap sheet like that would’ve been fired. But Bill O’Reilly still has a show and the network has jumped to his defense. Shame.

14. Failing to Hold Newscasters Accountable– Yes, working at Fox News isn’t really nice since newscasters are coached on what to report and female on-air talent are subject to harassment and confined to a skimpy outfit dress code. But when it comes to some really awful stuff among its talent, Fox News doesn’t seem to do anything about it or at least until there’s a big public scandal or the newscaster has become an increased liability to the network. And a lot of Fox newscasters get away with shit that their mainstream media counterparts wouldn’t. Yes, I know the bit about Roger Ailes being booted out as Fox News CEO for sexual harassment. But if it wasn’t for Gretchen Carlson filing a high profile lawsuit, Ailes would be network head today. Besides, other Fox executives and newscasters have had sexual harassment allegations as well. One of them is Bill O’Reilly whose show is still on the air and has also been accused of extortion and domestic abuse. O’Reilly also repeatedly denounced Kansas abortionist Dr. George Tiller for 4 years before his murder and may have called for his death. But he responded to such allegations saying, “no backpedaling here … every single thing we said about Tiller was true.” Maybe, but that’s absolutely no excuse for inciting violence against him and such comments are very irresponsible, especially for a public figure. Then we have O’Reilly’s long list of lies. He’s lied about winning two Peabodys for hosting Inside Edition in the 1990s which is a tabloid show. He’s claimed to be an average guy who came from nothing when he spent his childhood growing up in an affluent New York suburb, attending private school and college, taking regular vacations in Florida, and lucking out of the draft during Vietnam. Furthermore his father was a currency accountant for an oil company and I’m sure he earned more than $35,000 a year unlike what O’Reilly claims. He’s lied about knocking at the front door at George de Mohrenschildt’s daughter’s home at the moment de Mohrenschildt committed suicide. Audio files made by Gaeton Fonzi indicate he wasn’t there. He even lied about surviving a combat situation covering the 1982 Falklands War, even though there were no American journalists in the islands during the conflict. And that O’Reilly had arrived to Buenos Aires shortly before the war ended. He later said the situation was a riot in Buenos Aires after Argentina surrendered. Former CBS colleague Eric Engberg said the riot they covered wasn’t a combat situation where he heard no shots fired and saw no ambulances or tanks on the street. Furthermore, the sound guy and cameraman with O’Reilly at the time have backed up Engberg’s claims. At any rate, archived video of the incident shows that O’Reilly might’ve been right about the Falklands War riots being combat situations. However, his other claims regarding his reporting in El Salvador and Northern Ireland were questioned. In 2013, he stated: “I’ve seen soldiers gun down unarmed civilians in Latin America, Irish terrorists kill and maim their fellow citizens in Belfast with bombs.” He’s even claimed that he saw nuns gunned down in El Salvador. Later it was clarified that O’Reilly had been shown images of murdered nuns and Irish bombings but wasn’t an eyewitness in either case. Then he’s said to lie about being attacked by protesters while reporting the LA Riots which has also been disputed by former colleagues at Inside Edition. In the mainstream network news, you have NBC Nightly News anchor Brian Williams who lied about witnessing a helicopter being shot down in Iraq and got canned for it. O’Reilly lied about witnessing events several times and is still working. Not to mention the Daily Dot has a list of 99 of his lies and his history books have been charred by historians for being off-based and weakly researched. His books have even been bashed by conservative news outlets. His Killing Lincoln book was banned at the Ford’s Theatre bookstore for historical inaccuracies by the National Park Service which included a claim that Lincoln’s War Secretary Edwin Stanton was involved in his assassination plot. A claim in which he and co-author Martin Dugard failed to provide evidence. They also claim that Lincoln worked in his Oval Office which was actually constructed in 1909. In fact, his office was actually what we now call the Lincoln bedroom. Meanwhile, when respected CBS News anchor and 60 Minutes correspondent Dan Rather couldn’t supply any tangible proof on George W. Bush skipping out on his military service in 2004, the network fired him. O’Reilly still has his job despite that he’s been widely seen as a pathological liar. Yet, the fact he hasn’t been fired for things most journalists got canned for is just very disturbing as far as the media landscape goes.

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This is Wayne Simmons who was a Fox News resident “terror expert” claiming to be a former CIA agent. He was later sentenced to 33 months in jail for decades of fraudulent claims about being a CIA agent. He’s also had a rapsheet of swindling and firearms violations. You have to wonder what Fox News’ background check system is like.

15. Failing to Fact Check Sources and Background Check Experts– Like I said, Fox News cares more about their conservative agenda than it does about facts. And it doesn’t really care where they get their information from. So fact-checking sources isn’t really in vogue at the network. A lot of Fox’s sources usually come from the Heritage Foundation think tank but they also rely on conspiracy theorists and websites like Infowars which is owned by radio host Alex Jones who’s listed as an extremist by the Southern Poverty Law Center. Now Jones is notorious for his epic rants about “New World Order” plots for world government enforced eugenics, secret internment camps, militarized police, and behind the scenes control by a global corporate cabal. According to him, the only way to avert this dystopian future is if true patriots resist before it’s too late. His hundreds of thousands of acolytes are taking heed, building bunkers, hoarding food, and investing in precious metals. You might’ve seen Glenn Beck promoting these things whether on Fox News or on Comedy Central. In some cases like with Richard Poplawski and Jared Loughner, they’re resorting to violence like killing 3 cops with an AK-47 or killing 6 people and shooting a US Congresswoman in the head. He also believes that some of the nation’s worst mass shootings and terror attacks were government-led “false-flag” operations and even suggested that 9/11 was an inside job. Another SPLC extremist luminary Fox News has had on their network is self-proclaimed historian David Barton whose book The Jefferson Lies was recalled by the world’s largest Christian publishing company for too many serious errors. You know the kind of gross factual mistakes that would end a real historian’s career. Barton has promoted the false notion that our Founding Fathers never intended a separation between church and state but rather sought to build a Christian nation. His Wallbuilders group sells lots of books and DVDs pushing his fun-house vision of religious patriotism. However, despite being among “one of the 25 most influential Evangelicals” he’s an utter fraud whose version of American history is filled with flagrant omissions and distortions that bend reality to his own fact-free vision. Even among conservative Christian history scholars who’ve refuted his claims think he’s a crackpot. He was a regular guest on Glenn Beck’s “Founders’ Fridays.” Sometimes Fox would feature experts with sketchy credentials or sketchy ties. Many of the climate-denying “scientists” on the network don’t have a scientific background. One time, Bill O’Reilly had a “national security analyst” Ryan Mauro who claimed that Muslims were forming “no-go zones” in the US where they would train and launch domestic attacks. Not only they were never substantiated by credible sources in law enforcement, but he’s actually a national security analyst for the Clarion Project which has been classified as an anti-Muslim hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center. Fox News has invited him back numerous times to spread his false and inflammatory smears that give Fox News viewers the wrong impression of Islam along with an unwarranted fear of peaceful fellow citizens. There’s also Milwaukee sheriff named David Clarke who delivered a keynote address to a New York chapter Oath Keepers meeting, a right-wing militia terrorist group who believe in a wild set of conspiracy theories. These people were best known for their controversial presence during protests and unrests in Ferguson, Missouri during which members were armed with semi-automatics. The SPLC lists its founder as an extremist while the Anti-Defamation League describes them as “heavily armed extremists with a conspiratorial and anti-government mindset looking for potential showdowns with the government.” There was even a Fox News commentator Wayne Simmons who claimed to be a former CIA agent and had appeared numerous times on the network since 2002. He would later be sentenced to 33 months due to his fraudulent claims about being a CIA agent for decades and actually had neither military nor intelligence background. He also defrauded a woman out of $125,000 in a bogus real estate investment, defrauded the government several times, and illegally possessed two firearms around his arrest (due to being barred from having prior firearms violations at both the state and federal level). In other words, the man was a con artist. So I guess Fox News doesn’t do background checks on their experts either.

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Here’s a picture depicting the people whom Fox News sees as the most dangerous people on earth. One is the first black president they’ve talked shit about for years. The other Pope Francis whom Fox News labeled a Marxist who just bashed their brand of journalism. Oh, wait, what Fox News does isn’t really journalism. They just try to pass it on like it is. No wonder The Daily Show and late night comedians make fun of them.

Live Breaking TV News Headlines Gone Awry

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Whether it be your local news affiliates or the national and cable news shows, chances are that you might be familiar with them. And that you might be familiar with their use of captions through graphics to help you identify things as well ranging from story, location, or whoever’s being interviewed. Unlike the TV shows you watched which were taped and aired for an audience later, TV news is usually done live which leaves little room for mistakes. However, sometimes it doesn’t turn out that way. What I have to present to you are a series of news stills that contain their share of errors as well as crazy captions that go with them. I found these on sites thanks to Google as well as in places like Buzzfeed, Funny or Die, Fark, and others. Some of these captions may present a case of misindentification, spelling and grammar errors, redundant captions, and more. So for your reading pleasure I present to you stills of news captions gone wrong. Some of these might not be safe for work by the way.

  1. A big racked 5-point horse was killed today before being sent to a taxidermist and served as venison.
How did anyone think it's a horse? That's a deer. An antlered deer. Know the difference.

I don’t expect much from people who do these captions. But if they can’t distinguish between a horse and a deer, that’s a big problem for me. Seriously, it’s a deer. An antlered deer. Get a clue.

2. A violent sexual predator is on the loose.

Yeah, his name is Sparky who has been humping almost every other pooch in the neighborhood. Make sure your pets are spayed and neutered.

Yeah, his name is Sparky who has been humping almost every other pooch in the neighborhood. Make sure your pets are spayed and neutered.

3. Millions of Blackberry messages on hold throughout the galaxy.

Now even the Klingons can't get their Blackberry messages now. Unfortunately, the real world isn't Star Trek, CNN.

Now even the Klingons can’t get their Blackberry messages now. Unfortunately, the real world isn’t Star Trek, CNN.

4. “Man in Boxers Leads Police on Brief Chase.”

Well, this headline seems actually appropriate. Still, the image of police chasing a guy in his underwear is hard not to laugh at anyway.

Well, this headline seems actually appropriate. Still, the image of police chasing a guy in his underwear is hard not to laugh at anyway.

5. Ladies and gentlemen, presenting former President George Clinton.

Uh, he's actually former President William Jefferson Clinton or Bill for short. And his wife is running for president. Get a grip.

Uh, he’s actually former President William Jefferson Clinton or Bill for short. And his wife is running for president. Get a grip.

6. Norway leads the medal count in the Sochi Winter Olympics.

Save for Norway and Austria, the flags don't seem to match the country. Seriously, the stars and stripes is the US flag, not the Netherlands.'

Save for Norway and Austria, the flags don’t seem to match the country. Seriously, the stars and stripes is the US flag, not the Netherlands.’

7. Today Fox News is Live with former Republican Arizona Congresswoman J.D. Hayworth.

Okay, he may be a congresswoman in a man's body. But that's beside the point.

Okay, he may be a congresswoman in a man’s body. But that’s beside the point.

8. Here we are with Tiger Woods who’s just played his first golf tournament after his sex scandal.

Man, HLN did not use a good choice of captions here. Yes, he's talking about golf. But the caption makes it sound so dirty.

Man, HLN did not use a good choice of captions here. Yes, he’s talking about golf. But the caption makes it sound so dirty.

9. The Associated Press is now with a guy who peed in a reservoir.

It's funnier that his name is Josh Seater who most likely peed standing up. Unfortunately, he answered the call of nature at the wrong place such as a water supply.

It’s funnier that his name is Josh Seater who most likely peed standing up. Unfortunately, he answered the call of nature at the wrong place such as a water supply.

10. Today on Fox News: Is Lowering the Minimum Wage Better for Workers?

I know that Fox News is a conservative cable news channel. However, even an idiot would say that lowering the minimum wage isn't better for workers. Because there have been so many campaigns to raise it.

I know that Fox News is a conservative cable news channel. However, even an idiot would say that lowering the minimum wage isn’t better for workers. Because there have been so many campaigns to raise it. Seriously, raise the minimum wage for crying out loud!

11. Here are live at Name Here with Name Here.

Someone forgot to add names in this caption. Now I don't know who this guy is or where he's at.

Someone forgot to add names in this caption. Now I don’t know who this guy is or where he’s at.

12. Man turns in crack dealer for charging him too much.

Now that's a really stupid thing to do. Because don't police arrest drug users, too? I think so.

Now that’s a really stupid thing to do. Because don’t police arrest drug users, too? I think so.

13. Live on CNN: So is Cap n’ Crunch not really a captain?

How about: do I give a shit? No, but this guy seems a bit disappointed about it. Why CNN? Why?

How about: do I give a shit? No, but this guy seems a bit disappointed about it. Why CNN? Why?

14. Is school too easy for kids? Stay Tuned.

Apparently, not. Since whoever did this graphic doesn't know the difference between, to, two, and too.

Apparently, not. Since whoever did this graphic doesn’t know the difference between, to, two, and too.

15. On sports today it’s Full Title Screen Goes Here.

So is this the station's default screen. Because it sure looks like it to me. Someone doesn't seem to be doing their job.

So is this the station’s default screen. Because it sure looks like it to me. Someone doesn’t seem to be doing their job.

16. Now on 8 News, Murderer Feeds Ex-Fiancee to Her Parents at Barbecue.

That's just sick. Yet, Dr. Hannibal Lecter wanted to know what the killer used on the guy's ribs as a sauce.

That’s just sick. Yet, Dr. Hannibal Lecter wanted to know what the killer used on the guy’s ribs as a sauce.

17. At Fox 12, we’re here with Jessie Lunderby who posed for Playboy.

I don't think this is the right caption because this is a teenage boy. And I don't think his name is Jessie Lunderby.

I don’t think this is the right caption because this is a teenage boy. And I don’t think his name is Jessie Lunderby.

18. Rapper Gucci Mane is uncertain of his own guilt.

Funny how they quoted the guy as "Bitch I might be" when asked if he was guilty. Then again, he might be vying for a plea deal at this point.

Funny how they quoted the guy as “Bitch I might be” when asked if he was guilty. Then again, he might be vying for a plea deal at this point unless the charges are manslaughter.

19. In the Situation Room: Where Is Obama?

I think it's supposed to be: "Where Is Osama?" Wolf Blizter might need a caption proof reader sometime soon.

I think it’s supposed to be: “Where Is Osama?” Wolf Blizter might need a caption proof reader sometime soon.

20. Today “Poopgangster” was arrested for December shooting.

I know it's supposed to be a crime story. But a guy whose nickname is "poopgangster" is hard to take seriously. So was he Public Enemy No. 1 or No. 2?

I know it’s supposed to be a crime story. But a guy whose nickname is “poopgangster” is hard to take seriously. So was he Public Enemy No. 1 or No. 2?

21. Happening now in Washington on CNN, we have former presidential candidate Sarah Palin speaking.

This is just wrong on so many levels. For one, Sarah Palin is a former vice presidential candidate and her name is spelled with an "h." Also, that's Glenn Beck.

This is just wrong on so many levels. For one, Sarah Palin is a former vice presidential candidate and her name is spelled with an “h.” Also, that’s Glenn Beck.

22. Breaking News on CNN, Titanic sank 102 years ago tonight.

Sorry, CNN, but the fact the Titanic sank over 100 years ago isn't breaking news. Or even news. It's common knowledge that everyone should know by now.

Sorry, CNN, but the fact the Titanic sank over 100 years ago isn’t breaking news. Or even news. It’s common knowledge that everyone should know by now.

23. Today in politics, Congressman Anthony Weiner is shrinking his staff.

But whether this means his staff or his penis will be revealed after the next commercial. Stay tuned.

But whether this means his staff or his penis will be revealed after the next commercial. Stay tuned.

24. On CNN tonight is an exclusive on Michael Jackson’s death.

Shouldn't CNN be paying more attention to the story of 60-80 thousand children crossing the US-Mexican border. I think that deserves more coverage than a news ribbon for Christ's sake. Because it's a bigger story.

Shouldn’t CNN be paying more attention to the story of 60-80 thousand children crossing the US-Mexican border. I think that deserves more coverage than a news ribbon for Christ’s sake. Because it’s a bigger story.

25. Live at Eleven on Fox13: Human Remains Found which Could Belong to Lori Hacking.

However, this is a very terrible time to let people know that they can find recipes on your website. Seriously, this is not the kind of story.

However, this is a very terrible time to let people know that they can find recipes on your website. Seriously, this is not the kind of story.

26. In Dunwoody, Georgia, a Santa impersonator was asked to tone it down.

Yes, evil Santa Claus, please tone it down. You're scaring the children. Hell, you're scaring me.

Yes, evil Santa Claus, please tone it down. You’re scaring the children. Hell, you’re scaring me just smiling.

27. Krem News would like to wish you a great day.

However, you're probably not if you live in that burning building. Yeah, not a great scene to end a broadcast.

However, you’re probably not if you live in that burning building. Yeah, not a great scene to end a broadcast.

28. Today we’re speaking with Don Krasin, a World War 11 veteran.

I think it's supposed to be World War II. But, the captioner had no idea of how to do Roman numerals. At any rate, Krasin always likes to talk about how he and his buddies took down the alien overlords.

I think it’s supposed to be World War II. But, the captioner had no idea of how to do Roman numerals. At any rate, Krasin always likes to talk about how he and his buddies took down the alien overlords.

29. At PIX, we’re with Gerard Jankowski who’s one angry guy.

But we don't know what he's angry about. Stay tuned for further details.

But we don’t know what he’s angry about. Stay tuned for further details.

30. The main suspect in the Dentist Assault case is Firstname Lastname.

Someone really forgot to write the guy's name. Now he's going to be known by that for a very long time.

Someone really forgot to write the guy’s name. Now he’s going to be known by that for a very long time.

31. New at 10 on 19 Action News: Are Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches Racist?

Because they always seem to be depicted on white bread for some reason. Or maybe white people are projecting their latent racism on the sandwich?

Because they always seem to be depicted on white bread for some reason. Or maybe white people are projecting their latent racism on the sandwich?

32. New at 10 on KENS 5: Teen Werewolves.

Teen werewolves? Seriously? Seems like someone has been reading too much Twilight lately. Or watching too many werewolf movies.

Teen werewolves? Seriously? Seems like someone has been reading too much Twilight lately. Or watching too many werewolf movies.

33. On Fox News we have Michael Newman who is surprisingly not dead.

Guess this guy lived a very dangerous lifestyle like go near crocodiles and such. Still, what's with the "surprisingly not dead" part?

Guess this guy lived a very dangerous lifestyle like go near crocodiles and such. Still, what’s with the “surprisingly not dead” part?

34. We’re speaking with Aaron Mishkin a “Kick a Ginger Day” victim.

So kicking gingers is a thing? For God's sake, this isn't great for the ginger in question.

So kicking gingers is a thing? For God’s sake, this isn’t great for the ginger in question.

35. Today on KXLY 4 News: Man with Bizarre Name Arrested.

Is the bottom part his name? If yes, I feel very bad that his parents saddled him with that. If no, then the captioner must be goofing off.

Is the bottom part his name? If yes, I feel very bad that his parents saddled him with that. If no, then the captioner must be goofing off.

36. From KARE News, have a safe and happy Memorial Day Weekend so buckle up, slow down, and drink and drive.

I think someone forgot to enter the word "don't" before "drink and drive." Because drinking and driving isn't something society encourages. In fact, quite the opposite since such acts kill people as well as lead to jail time.

I think someone forgot to enter the word “don’t” before “drink and drive.” Because drinking and driving isn’t something society encourages. In fact, quite the opposite since such acts kill people as well as lead to jail time.

37. Exclusive on Korina Today, the MILF speaks.

Remember, in the Philippines, a MILF is an Islamic terrorist organization. However, in America, we wouldn't call that guy a MILF for obvious reasons.

Remember, in the Philippines, MILF is an Islamic terrorist organization. However, in America, we wouldn’t call that guy a MILF for obvious reasons.

38. On BBC News Today is Dr. Tom Hart a penguinologist.

Yes, penguinologist is a real job to describe someone who studies penguins. I googled the term myself. So the term isn't a mistake by the BBC.

Yes, penguinologist is a real job to describe someone who studies penguins. I googled the term myself. So the term isn’t a mistake by the BBC.

39. On The Weather Channel is Jeff Foster who’s tired of birds.

He even has a loud bull horn with him so he could get the birds off his lawn. Yes, he's a mean old man who hates birds.

He even has a loud bull horn with him so he could tell the birds to get off his lawn. Yes, he’s a mean old man who hates birds.

40. Live on MSNBC: 8 dead and 30 killed in Chicago violence.

You can easily say, "38 dead" or "38 killed" in Chicago violence. Because killed and dead mean almost the same thing when you're talking about murder.

You can easily say, “38 dead” or “38 killed” in Chicago violence. Because killed and dead mean almost the same thing when you’re talking about murder.

41. At least the Rapist Search may be over soon according to ABC 7.

Of course, this guy isn't going to have a nice day. Hope he has an alibi. Because the rapist sketch really resembles him.

Of course, this guy isn’t going to have a nice day. Hope he has an alibi. Because the rapist sketch really resembles him.

42. Our #4 story on the Top 5 concerns Middletown’s very own Jack Goff.

No, that's his actual name. Don't ask me. I wasn't consulted. Neither were his parents.

No, that’s his actual name. Don’t ask me. I wasn’t consulted. Neither were his parents.

43. Apparently, penalizing the Pittsburgh Penguins Alternate Captain was too much according to Pittsburgh’s FSN.

Not sure who this player is from the Pens. But he doesn't seem to be too happy in the penalty box. Seems to have a face like a kid who's just been sent to time out.

Not sure who this player is from the Pens. But he doesn’t seem to be too happy in the penalty box. Seems to have a face like a kid who’s just been sent to time out.

44. The Space Shuttle Columbia was traveling nearly 18 times the speed of light before the tragedy.

I remember that crash when I was 13. However, the shuttle wasn't going 18 times the speed of light. Because that's an impossible speed.

I remember that crash when I was 13. However, the shuttle wasn’t going 18 times the speed of light. Because that’s an impossible speed.

45. Live on WBTV 3 this morning a man was killed to death.

"Killed to death" really? That really doesn't help matters. Just say the guy was killed because it's obviously a murder story.

“Killed to death” really? That really doesn’t help matters. Just say the guy was killed because it’s obviously a murder story.

46. Breaking News on Fox 5 News: Fire Destroyed by Home.

I think it's supposed to be "Home Destroyed by Fire." Obviously someone got the word order wrong. Because homes don't destroy fires.

I think it’s supposed to be “Home Destroyed by Fire.” Obviously someone got the word order wrong. Because homes don’t destroy fires.

47. On WUSA 9: J.C. McKinney goes for last minute groceries because he forgot cheez whiz.

Is a guy forgetting cheez whiz newsworthy? People forget cheez whiz all the time but they don't get to be on TV.

Is a guy forgetting cheez whiz newsworthy? People forget cheez whiz all the time but they don’t get to be on TV.

48. Today on Fox News we sit down with Holocaust winner Elie Wiesel.

For crying out loud, Fox News, Wiesel's a Holocaust survivor, not a winner. The Holocaust was a mass genocide, not a contest. This is fucked up.

For crying out loud, Fox News, Wiesel’s a Holocaust survivor, not a winner. The Holocaust was a mass genocide, not a contest. This is fucked up.

49. According to Pat Buchanan on Fox News, illegal aliens are bringing STDs into the country.

Really? Some undocumented immigrants may have STDs. But syphilis and gonorrhea aren't new STDs. Besides, it's insulting.

Really? Some undocumented immigrants may have STDs. But syphilis and gonorrhea aren’t new STDs as well as easier to avoid than others. Besides, it’s very insulting.

50. According to a Rasmussen poll on Fox News, 59% and 35% believe that scientists falsified research to support their theory on global warming.

For one, global warming does exist so the scientists aren't falsifying their research at any rate. But since it's Fox News we're talking about, global warming denial is expected. Second, the math is totally wrong because the numbers add to 120%.

For one, global warming does exist and is a very real problem so the scientists aren’t falsifying their research at any rate. But since it’s Fox News we’re talking about, global warming denial is expected. Second, the math is totally wrong because the numbers add to 120%.

51. Today in the Middle East, Secretary of Gates meats with Israeli defense secretary Ehud Barak.

Unfortunately, Fox News totally fails in geography since they forget that Egypt is in Africa and across the sea from Saudi Arabia. The country between Iran and Syria is Iraq.

Unfortunately, Fox News totally fails in geography since they forget that Egypt is in Africa and across the sea from Saudi Arabia. The country between Iran and Syria is Iraq.

52. This Fox News correspondent is waiting for President Obama’s arrival.

Not if Michelle has anything to do with it. Still, that caption is so suggestive. Yet, Fox News didn't change it.

Not if Michelle has anything to do with it. Still, that caption is so suggestive. Yet, Fox News didn’t change it.

53. According to this pie chart, here is how each GOP presidential candidate stands out.

Apparently, the person who designed this Fox News pie chart has no conception of math. Add 60%, 70% and 63%, you come up with 193%.

Apparently, the person who designed this Fox News pie chart has no conception of math. Add 60%, 70% and 63%, you come up with 193%.

54. Wednesday at 10 on Fox 8 News: we’re going to show you Making Money with Your Body.

This is just so wrong on so many levels. From what I see, this seems like "How to Become a Prostitute" than anything. Not cool.

This is just so wrong on so many levels. From what I see, this seems like “How to Become a Prostitute” than anything. Not cool.

55. In the DA murder plot, Affidavit Reveals Possible Suspect.

An old guy on a segway who's minding his own business? Don't ask me, but I think this station might've used the wrong footage for the caption.

An old guy on a segway who’s minding his own business? Don’t ask me, but I think this station might’ve used the wrong footage for the caption.

56. Homeowner burns house after setting snake on fire.

The guy could've just avoided the whole thing altogether by simply calling animal control. Seriously, they would've taken care of it just fine.

The guy could’ve just avoided the whole thing altogether by simply calling animal control. Seriously, they would’ve taken care of it just fine.

57. Today on All In with Chris Hayes is someone who studies duck genitalia.

Yes, there are people who actually do that. But still, it's kind of hard to take seriously at any rate.

Yes, there are people who actually do that. But still, it’s kind of hard to take seriously at any rate. Thank you, MSNBC.

58. According to CNN Money, Hogwarts costs more than Harvard.

This looks very wrong and probably not conducted by people who read the Harry Potter books. $123 for gloves, you got to be kidding me. Besides, they don't seem to include a cauldron, a pet, or anything else.

This looks very wrong and probably not conducted by people who read the Harry Potter books. $123 for gloves, you got to be kidding me. Besides, they don’t seem to include a cauldron, a pet, or anything else. Not to mention, gloves don’t nearly cost that much.

59. Today’s weather report on 4 WARN is by meteorologist Dagny the Dog.

Seems like the forecast today isn't calling for warmer temperatures that remain in the 20s and 30s. So wear a blanket.

Seems like the forecast today isn’t calling for warmer temperatures that remain in the 20s and 30s. So wear a blanket.

60. Apparently, CBS News can’t name that player.

His last name is Jefferson which is on the back of his jersey. He's from LSU. This is ridiculous.

His last name is Jefferson which is on the back of his jersey. He’s from LSU. This is ridiculous.

61. According to WGN 9 News, Dwayne Wade is not a hockey player.

Well, that really narrows it down. So if he's not a hockey player what is he? A basketball player? If so, then just say it.

Well, that really narrows it down. So if he’s not a hockey player what is he? A basketball player? He seems to be wearing a basketball jersey. If so, then just say it.

62. According to the BBC, nobody cares about Declan Curry.

So if nobody cares, why is he on TV? Because somebody must care what he has to say or he wouldn't be on the BBC.

So if nobody cares, why is he on TV? Because somebody must care what he has to say or he wouldn’t be on the BBC.

63. David Davis was arrested while in the middle of a haircut.

That is possibly one of the funniest mugshots ever. Bet he's going to be the laughing stock of the big house sometime soon.

That is possibly one of the funniest mugshots ever. Bet he’s going to be the laughing stock of the big house sometime soon.

64. We are now live with Name Last Name in Location.

Yet, another captioner not doing their job. Seriously, people have to know who the reporter is or where he's at right now.

Yet, another captioner not doing their job. Seriously, people have to know who the reporter is or where he’s at right now.

65. Fox News asks: How often to you think about touching other people’s private parts?

Like never. Still, I have a question for Fox News: why the fuck did you ask your viewers this? Then again, this might've been put forward by Roger Ailes who was head of Fox News at the time. And I know how often he thought about touching other people's private parts.

Like never. Still, I have a question for Fox News: why the fuck did you ask your viewers this? Then again, this might’ve been put forward by Roger Ailes who was head of Fox News at the time. And I know how often he thought about touching other people’s private parts.

66. Today BBC News sits with writer, wizard, Mall Santa, and Rasputin Impersonator Alan Moore.

Well, he certainly looks the part since he has a long beard and hair. Yet, it's kind of hard to take seriously.

Well, he certainly looks the part since he has a long beard and hair. Yet, it’s kind of hard to take seriously.

67. Today we have an exclusive on blow jobs.

Can't they just say demolitions? Seriously, blow jobs is too sexually suggestive? I mean it's an oral sex slang term.

Can’t they just say demolitions? Seriously, blow jobs is too sexually suggestive? I mean it’s an oral sex slang term.

68. Tonight at 10 on 8: The Chainsaw Chicken has been captured.

So you don't have to worry about a chainsaw wielding chicken murdering you anymore over your diet of poultry and eggs. He's now in police custody as we speak.

So you don’t have to worry about a chainsaw wielding chicken murdering you anymore over your diet of poultry and eggs. He’s now in police custody as we speak. And he did not get to cross the road.

69. Reporting on MSNBC Norah O’Donnell from the White House.

Seems like forgetting 3 letters can make all the difference. No, I don't think she's reporting from "the White Ho."

Seems like forgetting 3 letters can make all the difference. No, I don’t think she’s reporting from “the White Ho.”

70. A developing story on LEX 8 News is of a Jessamine County inmate who overdosed on underwear.

First off, how is overdosing on underwear possible? Second off, why would anyone even try?

First off, how is overdosing on underwear possible? Second off, why would anyone even try?

71. On Fox 2 a homeless man steals an EMS rig to go to a strip club.

Has anyone at the station heard the term ambulance? Because that's what an EMS rig is. Also, why couldn't a homeless man just steal a regular car to go to a strip club? Or walk?

Has anyone at the station heard the term ambulance? Because that’s what an EMS rig is. Also, why couldn’t a homeless man just steal a regular car to go to a strip club? Or walk?

72. Coming up on WTAE 4 Action News: Girl takes on Dick’s.

This one is from a news station where I live, by the way. Still, I think they mean Dick's Sporting Goods in this context. But they had to use that caption with a girl looking at her cell phone, a poor choice.

This one is from a news station where I live, by the way. Still, I think they mean Dick’s Sporting Goods in this context. But they had to use that caption with a girl looking at her cell phone, which suggests sexting.

73. KCTV 5 News says you can find great kitten barbecue recipes on My KSMO-TV at 8 a.m.

I think the word is supposed to be "kitchen" not kitten. This Kansas City station might want to apologize to local cat lovers.

I think the word is supposed to be “kitchen” not kitten. This Kansas City station might want to apologize to local cat lovers.

74. On WBRE we have continuing coverage of the serial butt stabbers.

Yes, the knife picture is quite appropriate. But while the serial butt stabbers may be serious threats, their name inspires shits and giggles. Hope they don't attack from behind.

Yes, the knife picture is quite appropriate. But while the serial butt stabbers may be serious threats, their name inspires shits and giggles. Hope they don’t attack from behind.

75. Kevin Poehner likes portable toilets as he stands near a Honey Bucket.

Nor sure what to think about that kid who may or may not have a sense a smell. Because outhouses are utterly disgusting and smelly places that I try to avoid.

Nor sure what to think about that kid who may or may not have a sense a smell. Because outhouses are utterly disgusting and smelly places that I try to avoid.

76. Live in Phoenix, a suspicious flashlight was found in a parking lot between 3rd Avenue and Jefferson.

I guess this is going to come down to a waste of airtime as reporters speculate who left the flashlight in the parking lot. Stay tuned.

I guess this is going to come down to a waste of airtime as reporters speculate who left the flashlight in the parking lot. Stay tuned.

77. New this morning on ABC 13: Cat called for jury duty.

Yes, it should come as a shock, even for the cat. Don't ask me how this happened.

Yes, it should come as a shock, even for the cat. Don’t ask me how this happened.

78. According to CNN, experts agree that Osama Bin Laden is either alive or dead.

Well, that really clears things up. Then again, if experts can't make up their minds whether someone is alive or dead, it shouldn't be news.

Well, that really clears things up. Then again, if experts can’t make up their minds whether someone is alive or dead, it shouldn’t be news.

79. Fox Toledo brings you more coverage of the Cheeseburger Stabbing.

What is there someone going around stabbing cheeseburgers? I need details for God's sake.

What is there someone going around stabbing cheeseburgers? I need details for God’s sake.

80. On Fox News, Neil Cavuto asks, can sex with underage boys be a good thing?

Why the fuck would anyone in their right mind ask that question? Hell, no, could sex with underage boys be a good thing for obvious reasons. There's a reason why people who do that get on Megan's Law for God's sake!

Why the fuck would anyone in their right mind ask that question? Hell, no, could sex with underage boys be a good thing for obvious reasons. There’s a reason why people who do that get on Megan’s Law for God’s sake!

81. On LEX 18 News a woman was glued to a toilet at a Wayne County Wal Mart.

This woman's face is like: "Why do I have to do this ridiculous story? I didn't sign up for this. Don't people have any common sense?"

This woman’s face is like: “Why do I have to do this ridiculous story? I didn’t sign up for this. Don’t people have any common sense?”

82. Breaking on Fox 40 reports Obama Bin Laden dead.

I guess this was a slip of the tongue, given Obama's reputation on Fox News. Sorry, but it's Osama Bin Laden.

I guess this was a slip of the tongue, given Obama’s reputation on Fox News. Sorry, but it’s Osama Bin Laden who’s dead thanks to Obama.

83. Fox 5 sits with actor Omar Epps.

Sorry but that's definitely not actor Omar Epps. Because Omar Epps is obviously black and doesn't have a lot of hair.

Sorry but that’s definitely not actor Omar Epps. Because Omar Epps is obviously black and doesn’t have a lot of hair.

84. According to the Greg-Alogue on Fox News, sex with robots may not be what it’s all cracked up to be.

Other than its obvious right wing biased news commentary and coverage, is there any reason why we make fun of Fox News? Probably because they air stuff about sex with robots and other stories like that.

Other than its obvious right wing biased news commentary and coverage, is there any reason why we make fun of Fox News? Probably because they air stuff about sex with robots and other stories like that.

85. On Fox 25, we’re live on the news story about a captain’s epic search for his sandwich.

How is this news? Seriously, people miss sandwiches all the time. But they move on with their lives. This is just fluff.

How is this news? Seriously, people miss sandwiches all the time. But they move on with their lives. This is just fluff.

86. Breaking news on PIX is Top Line All Caps in Bottom Line All Caps.

Seems like a crime story by the police cars. But you don't know why they're there. Because someone forgot to do the caption.

Seems like a crime story by the police cars. But you don’t know why they’re there. Because someone forgot to do the caption.

87. KATU 2 is live in Downtown Portland in our continuing coverage on the sign bandit.

And it seems that the sign bandit was just there. Just look behind the reporter.

And it seems that the sign bandit was just there. Just look behind the reporter.

88. Fox 14 News brings you coverage on the drunk driving lasw.

I think it's supposed to be "laws." But the captioner didn't have time to proofread before they were on the air.

I think it’s supposed to be “laws.” But the captioner didn’t have time to proofread before they were on the air.

89. NY 1 sits down with actor Wesley Snipes.

That's Democratic New York congressman Charlie Rangel who left office in disgrace over a corruption scandal. Jon Stewart often made fun of him on the Daily Show for awhile.

That’s Democratic New York congressman Charlie Rangel who left office in disgrace over a corruption scandal. Jon Stewart often made fun of him on the Daily Show for awhile.

90. Rodney Stanger: Cold Case Suspect?

That's a hamster with a director's board. Really not someone you'd consider a cold case suspect. This is just hilarious.

That’s a hamster with a director’s board. Really not someone you’d consider a cold case suspect. This is just hilarious.

91. Breaking on CBS Sports: Everything is back to normal.

Uh, a football player just got hurt here so the Steelers-Ravens game stopped. So no, everything is not back to normal.

Uh, a football player just got hurt here so the Steelers-Ravens game stopped. So no, everything is not back to normal. Has this captioner ever been to a football game?

92. Breaking News on KDKA 2: Many words should fit in this sentence bar. Do not try to type in a paragraph to tell the story.

Another local station where I live. Seems like a captioner wasn't doing their job at a critical moment.

Another local station where I live. Seems like a captioner wasn’t doing their job at a critical moment.

93. Today on Fox News: Will high gas prices cost your kids their edutaion?

I think it's supposed to be "education." But someone on Fox News forgot to proofread before it went on the air. Really makes them look bad. Then again, this was the network that said the Pilgrims celebrated Christmas.

I think it’s supposed to be “education.” But someone on Fox News forgot to proofread before it went on the air. Really makes them look bad. Then again, this was the network that said the Pilgrims celebrated Christmas.

94. Congratulations to to today’s winner, Byron, Minnesota’s Dixie Normous!

That has to be a joke name because I don't think that person expected to win. Then again, it's pretty funny.

That has to be a joke name because I don’t think that person expected to win. Then again, it’s pretty funny.

95. On WXYZ 7, we’re here with Sal Rizzo who took a picture of a naked guy.

Guess this guy saw the streaker while he was minding his own business. Yet, I wonder why the naked guy thing is on the news to begin with.

Guess this guy saw the streaker while he was minding his own business. Yet, I wonder why the naked guy thing is on the news to begin with.

96. A pizza delivery murder took place in East Memphis.

I don't know about you, Pizza Hut, but this isn't a great way to announce that you're hiring delivery drivers. Because I don't think many are willing to take that job at the moment.

I don’t know about you, Pizza Hut, but this isn’t a great way to announce that you’re hiring delivery drivers. Because I don’t think many are willing to take that job at the moment.

97. On Fox 8: Florence Koppin turns 1000 years old.

She turned 100 years old. No human can live to 1000 years for God's sake. So where could she be from, the Middle Ages?

She turned 100 years old. No human can live to 1000 years for God’s sake. So where could she be from, the Middle Ages?

98. Ottawa CTVNews would like to ask viewers would they prefer rain or sun in the summer: Yes or No.

Sorry, but that's no way to conduct a poll. Sun or rain should be the answers not yes or no. Because it's not a yes or no question. Get a grip, Canada.

Sorry, but that’s no way to conduct a poll. Sun or rain should be the answers not yes or no. Because it’s not a yes or no question. Get a grip, Canada.

99. Joakim Noah of the Chicago Bulls knows how to post videos on Facebook.

Knowing how to post videos on Facebook isn't a special skill. The guy is an NBA basketball player. Surely he has more larger than life talents.

Knowing how to post videos on Facebook isn’t a special skill. The guy is an NBA basketball player. Surely he has more larger than life talents.

100. Tonight, wife stabs husband with squirrel.

Sure I know it's not funny to the husband in question. But I want to stay tuned to know how she pulled it off.

Sure I know it’s not funny to the husband in question. But I want to stay tuned to know how she pulled it off even though she’s nuts.

Star Trek Treats from the Mess Hall

catwalk_01

While there’s not a lot of craft projects being made in Star Trek, there is a lot of talk pertaining to food. After all, Starfleet officers always need to eat somehow. And most of the time, a ship always has to have a mess hall unless you’re on Deep Space Nine. There, you have Quark’s Bar and Casino which is like Rick’s Cafe Americain in space. That or Mos Eisley Spaceport. Not to mention, there’s probably other places as well with some officers cooking their own food such as Commander Sisko who wouldn’t dare replicate his ingredients. Though spaceships on Star Trek tend to have some food, many would be lost if it weren’t for replication technology. Mess halls also have to account for resident aliens on the ship as well since they might prefer their food prepared differently than what humans are used to. For instance, while Captain Picard might prefer a lobster that’s already been in a pot, Worf would probably want to eat his while it’s still alive. And he might strongly prefer one from his home planet which might seem more menacing than its earth counterpart. This is where replication technology also comes in hand as well. Still, don’t ask me how it works. Nevertheless, outside the Star Trek universe, you have plenty of Trekkies who also have Trek themed parties with Trek themed treats. And this is where I come in. So for your reading pleasure, I give you Star Trek treats from the final frontier.

 

  1. Fans of the original series would enjoy these Star Trek cookies.
And it seems to consist of all the main characters. So adorable you'd just want to eat them up.

And it seems to consist of all the main characters. So adorable you’d just want to eat them up.

2. Those who enjoyed “Devil in the Dark” might like this Horta from chocolate crackles.

Yes, it looks disgusting. But it seems way less gross than what you'd see on the original show.

Yes, it looks disgusting. But it seems way less gross than what you’d see on the original show.

3. Any young Starfleet officer is always going to need what’s in their Star Trek tricorder bento lunch.

Well, a sushi tricorder, some meat balls, and an American cheese Starfleet insignia. Still, that tricorder looks like a work of art.

Well, a sushi tricorder, some meat balls, and an American cheese Starfleet insignia. Still, that tricorder looks like a work of art.

4. Starfleet jello shots always make great desserts.

Well, for adults 21+ anyway if they contain alcohol. But it consists of colors you'd find on the Starfleet uniforms.

Well, for adults 21+ anyway if they contain alcohol. But it consists of colors you’d find on the Starfleet uniforms.

5. These cookies with Starfleet insignia are surely bound to shine.

After all, they're made from stars and decorated with icing. Kind of clever if you think of it.

After all, they’re made from stars and decorated with icing. Kind of clever if you think of it.

6. When it comes to Captain Picard, always bake it so with these cookies.

Oddly, some of the cookies here say, "Bake it so." Also like the teapots on these, too.

Oddly, some of the cookies here say, “Bake it so.” Also like the teapots on these, too.

7. This Spock bento lunch is surely the logical choice.

After all, it has a cheese Spock over a sandwich. Still, it's nutritional content should allow your kid to live long and prosper.

After all, it has a cheese Spock over a sandwich. Still, it’s nutritional content should allow your kid to live long and prosper.

8. These cookies are a must have at any Trekkie’s baby shower.

Yes, I know they're professionally made. But the sayings on these are so funny.

Yes, I know they’re professionally made. But the sayings on these are so funny.

9. An Enterprise topped cake is great for any party that’s boldly going where no party has gone before.

Like the space motifs on this. Probably made by someone who's either a professional or has too much time on their hands.

Like the space motifs on this. Probably made by someone who’s either a professional or has too much time on their hands.

10. This bento gives a nutritious lunch for any young Starfleet cadet in your life.

Well, it's nutritious all right. Doesn't hurt that the sandwich is shaped like the Enterprise.

Well, it’s nutritious all right. Doesn’t hurt that the sandwich is shaped like the Enterprise.

11. No party on the Enterprise could ever be complete without cookies like these.

Since these cookies are of Starfleet officer insignia. Might not be for all alien tastes.

Since these cookies are of Starfleet officer insignia. Might not be for all alien tastes.

12. No Klingon bash can ever be complete without some Klingon rolls.

Since such bread makes an ideal side dish for a warrior. I'm sure Worf will be pleased.

Since such bread makes an ideal side dish for a warrior. I’m sure Worf will be pleased.

13. Resistance against this Borg cube cake is futile.

It even lights up. But it's presented at any Trek themed party, you will be assimilated.

It even lights up. But it’s presented at any Trek themed party, you will be assimilated.

14. Those who like the Doctor from Voyager will surely enjoy this cake of him from his sickbay.

This is especially if your name is Robert Picardo who played the guy. Interestingly enough, the guy initially auditioned for Neelix and add libbed during his audition for the Doctor. However, the Doctor on the show ended up becoming much more popular.

This is especially if your name is Robert Picardo who played the guy. Interestingly enough, the guy initially auditioned for Neelix and add libbed during his audition for the Doctor. However, the Doctor on the show ended up becoming much more popular.

15. At Star Trek parties, it’s not unusual for gingerbread men to be Starfleet security officers.

Because we all know what happens to them on planets in the original series. After all, there's a reason why a lot of them don' come back.

Because we all know what happens to them on planets in the original series. After all, there’s a reason why a lot of them don’ come back.

16. A cake like this is great for ensuring the Trekkie in your life to live long and prosper.

However, I don't think the Enterprise topper is edible on this. Still, cool that it lights up if you ask me.

However, I don’t think the Enterprise topper is edible on this. Still, cool that it lights up if you ask me.

17. On Starfleet, these jello shots seem well suited for any space vessel’s mess hall party.

Only for those 21+ if they contain alcohol. Available in 3 colors. Of course, those who get red shouldn't beam down to the planet for awhile.

Only for those 21+ if they contain alcohol. Available in 3 colors. Of course, those who get red shouldn’t beam down to the planet for awhile.

18. Nothing makes a Star Trek party like a Starfleet roll cake.

After all, it's patterned with Starfleet insignia. What's not a Trekkie to love?

After all, it’s patterned with Starfleet insignia. What’s not a Trekkie to love?

19. With these Borg cupcakes, you will be assimilated with frosting.

These are clever and adorable. Nevertheless, you don't say that about the Borg very often since they're among the most sinister Star Trek villains to date.

These are clever and adorable. Nevertheless, you don’t say that about the Borg very often since they’re among the most sinister Star Trek villains to date.

20. It’s very apparent that no Klingon could ever resist the taste of a pie from home.

Of course, I'm sure a real Klingon pie would be much more disgusting. However, I think this one is well made with the Klingon logo included.

Of course, I’m sure a real Klingon pie would be much more disgusting. However, I think this one is well made with the Klingon logo included.

21. Fans of the original series might enjoy this cake of a communicator.

Funny how that technology from the future is less advanced than my cell phone. Still, this cake bears a very close resemblance.

Funny how that technology from the future is less advanced than my cell phone. Still, this cake bears a very close resemblance.

22. Nothing brings a Trekkie party to life like these cookies of undead captains.

And I guess Captain Picard is holding his own head. Well, at least they got the uniforms right.

And I guess Captain Picard is holding his own head. Well, at least they got the uniforms right.

23. No Klingon party could ever be worthwhile without a cake like this.

Yes, this is a Klingon cake. Not sure what it's supposed to look like. Some fans might though.

Yes, this is a Klingon cake. Not sure what it’s supposed to look like. Some fans might though.

24. I guess any member of Starfleet celebrates their birthday with this cake.

Seems about right since it has the Starfleet insignia. Probably professionally made though.

Seems about right since it has the Starfleet insignia. Probably professionally made though.

25. If you’re a fan of the United Federation of Planets, then this cake’s for you.

This is pretty cool, too. Like how everything's lined in gold. Probably didn't come cheap.

This is pretty cool, too. Like how everything’s lined in gold. Probably didn’t come cheap.

26. Grace your Trek party with this cake of the captain on bridge.

This one is from the original series as you see here. But I'm sure any Trekkie would like it.

This one is from the original series as you see here. But I’m sure any Trekkie would like it.

27.  A gingerbread Enterprise is always said to shoot down candy cane laser beams.

Sure it's not for eating. But you have to admire how this Trekkie pulled this off. Very creative if you ask me.

Sure it’s not for eating. But you have to admire how this Trekkie pulled this off. Very creative if you ask me.

28. A great Star Trek cake always has to include Captain Kirk and Spock.

After all, these two guys are really best friends. And the art on this isn't too shabby either.

After all, these two guys are really best friends. And the art on this isn’t too shabby either.

29. This cake was brought to you by the United Federation of Planets.

And. boy, this cake seems to have a lot of detail. Probably made from some high end bakery in the galaxy.

And. boy, this cake seems to have a lot of detail. Probably made from some high end bakery in the galaxy.

30. Resistance against this Hello Kitty Borg cake is futile.

Never have I ever seen Borg assimilation look so adorable. That said, this is kind of disturbing.

Never have I ever seen Borg assimilation look so adorable. That said, this is kind of disturbing.

31. Looks like this Enterprise bridge cake is a bit bare.

Well, this is from Star Trek: Enterprise. But yes, it kind of looks gray if you ask me.

Well, this is from Star Trek: Enterprise. But yes, it kind of looks gray if you ask me.

32. Fans of Deep Space Nine can only dream of a cake like this.

From how it's detail, it's certainly professionally made. But it looks really cool.

From how it’s detail, it’s certainly professionally made. But it looks really cool, too.

33. Trekkies who like making money might enjoy a cake of a Ferengi.

The Ferengi aren't really good or evil because they only wish to make money. And they don't care where the cash comes from either.

The Ferengi aren’t really good or evil because they only wish to make money. And they don’t care where the cash comes from either.

34. For those holier than thou Trekkies, this is just the cake for you.

Yes, I know this cake might seem sacrilegious to some. But there are plenty of religious people who enjoy Star Trek and might find this awesome. So to each his own.

Yes, I know this cake might seem sacrilegious to some. But there are plenty of religious people who enjoy Star Trek and might find this awesome. So to each his own.

35. This Janeway cake will surely go well with the Borg cupcakes.

Okay, Janeway might not be the best Star Trek captain. But this cake is quite awesome if you ask me.

Okay, Janeway might not be the best Star Trek captain. But this cake is quite awesome if you ask me.

36. Red Shirt Oreos are always a hit at any Starfleet bash.

After all, they seem quite easy to make that they're almost expendable. Get it?

After all, they seem quite easy to make that they’re almost expendable. Get it?

37. Celebrate a young Starfleet officer’s birthday with this uniform cake.

This one is from Next Generation so you don't have to worry. In fact, many of the main cast from that show wears one and they usually return from the planet.

This one is from Next Generation so you don’t have to worry. In fact, many of the main cast from that show wears one and they usually return from the planet.

38. Any Trekkie dessert platter can’t be complete without these cookies.

These include a phaser, Starfleet insignia, Klingon insignia, the Enterprise, and the Vulcan salute. But they all seem well decorated.

These include a phaser, Starfleet insignia, Klingon insignia, the Enterprise, and the Vulcan salute. But they all seem well decorated.

39. A Horta loaf always goes well with a Starfleet biscuit.

Not sure what those gray things are. But this dish looks rather edible for some humans.

Not sure what those gray things are. But this dish looks rather edible for some humans.

40. A gingerbread communicator always makes a tasty Trekkie treat.

Unless if you're a gingerbread Starfleet officer. Then it's essential for getting in touch with the Enterprise. Just kidding.

Unless if you’re a gingerbread Starfleet officer. Then it’s essential for getting in touch with the Enterprise. Just kidding.

41. Remember, it’s always okay to be Takei.

Well, that's according to this bento. Those who know about George Takei's sexual orientation will sure get this.

Well, that’s according to this bento. Those who know about George Takei’s sexual orientation will sure get this.

42. Well, these Star Trek cookies seem like they’re happy.

Except good Spock and evil Spock that is. Also includes a couple of redshirts. I wonder why.

Except good Spock and evil Spock that is. Also includes a couple of redshirts. I wonder why.

43. Seems like something is bursting from this Starfleet cake you don’t see every day.

Guess this is a mashup of Star Trek: TNG and the Alien franchise. Where's Ellen Ripley when you need her?

Guess this is a mashup of Star Trek: TNG and the Alien franchise. Where’s Ellen Ripley when you need her?

44. Your guests will find it hard to not get greedy with these Ferengi ear rolls.

Okay, they may not bear a close resemblance. But I like this dish. So it goes on the post.

Okay, they may not bear a close resemblance. But I like this dish. So it goes on the post.

45. No Starfleet party dessert platter is complete without these cake pops.

Each one bears the Starfleet insignia. Comes in 6 types.

Each one bears the Starfleet insignia. Comes in 6 types.

46. What could Captain Picard do if he didn’t have scones with his Earl Grey tea?

Okay, he might not have scones with his tea. But if he did, these would be perfect.

Okay, he might not have scones with his tea. But if he did, these would be perfect.

47. Star Trek cupcakes like these are surely hard to resist.

These also consist of stuff you might find from the original series. Even a green girl and tribble. Adorable.

These also consist of stuff you might find from the original series. Even a green girl and tribble. Adorable.

48. This Trekkie cake is bound to be a chocolate lovers delight.

Since it has chocolate icing, chocolate chips, and M&Ms. And it looks so delicious as well as easy to make.

Since it has chocolate icing, chocolate chips, and M&Ms. And it looks so delicious as well as easy to make.

49. I guess this cake has phasers set to stun.

However, the uniform seems like it's from The Next Generation. So I'm a little confused.

However, the uniform seems like it’s from The Next Generation. So I’m a little confused.

50. This bento lunch will help any Vulcan kid live long and prosper.

Then again, Vulcans are vegetarians. But this is a great edible Spock tribute if you ask me.

Then again, Vulcans are vegetarians. But this is a great edible Spock tribute if you ask me.

51. Resistance to these Borg jello shots is futile.

The official recipe contains alcohol so it's for those 21+ only. However, I'm not sure if the Borg would eat these though.

The official recipe contains alcohol so it’s for those 21+ only. However, I’m not sure if the Borg would eat these though.

52. Fans of TNG’s “Conspiracy” episode might enjoy a plate of meal worms and parasite bread.

Don't worry, the meal worms are pasta. However, I do like the breaded crabs though. So creative.

Don’t worry, the meal worms are pasta. However, I do like the breaded crabs though. So creative.

53. For Worf, a dish of Klingon octopus is just the ticket.

Yeah, Klingon food looks like that but more disgusting. After all, Klingons eat their meat live and bloody.

Yeah, Klingon food looks like that but more disgusting. After all, Klingons eat their meat live and bloody.

54. Fans of the original series will find sugar cookies like these quite delightful.

Well, these consist of members of the main cast on Enterprise. And they're so adorable in frosting.

Well, these consist of members of the main cast on Enterprise. And they’re so adorable in frosting.

55. For fans of “Amok Time” this is the cake just for you.

Not sure if Kirk and Spock's fight scene is appropriate cake material. However, I understand that some Trekkies might not care.

Not sure if Kirk and Spock’s fight scene is appropriate cake material. However, I understand that some Trekkies might not care.

56. Grace your Starfleet dessert platter with a quality redshirt cake.

After all, it's most likely the most expendable Star Trek cake available. As I know what happens to redshirts.

After all, it’s most likely the most expendable Star Trek cake available. As I know what happens to redshirts.

57. Seems like this Enterprise boldly came with more meat than it did before.

I think this is an Enterprise meat sculpture. So unfortunately, it's not for eating and won't help you live long and prosper.

I think this is an Enterprise meat sculpture. So unfortunately, it’s not for eating and won’t help you live long and prosper.

58. Nothing makes a better addition to a Trekkie party than a gingerbread enterprise.

Yes, this is another gingerbread Enterprise. But this one is covered in icing while the last one wasn't.

Yes, this is another gingerbread Enterprise. But this one is covered in icing while the last one wasn’t.

59. Wish your guests to live long and prosper with this Star Trek cookie platter.

Comes with uniforms, Starfleet insignia, and Spock. And all cookies are covered in icing.

Comes with uniforms, Starfleet insignia, and Spock. And all cookies are covered in icing.

60. Of course, any Trekkie doctor is bound to enjoy this Dr. McCoy cake.

Yes, this is professionally made and some of the decorations aren't edible. But it's pretty funny and in the true Dr. McCoy spirit.

Yes, this is professionally made and some of the decorations aren’t edible. But it’s pretty funny and in the true Dr. McCoy spirit.

61. These Starfleet tarts are certain to make any Enterprise party a hit.

Guess they have 3 different fillings like strawberry, lemon, and blueberry. And are all shaped like Starfleet insignia.

Guess they have 3 different fillings like strawberry, lemon, and blueberry. And are all shaped like Starfleet insignia.

62. Guess this bento carries a phaser lunch set to stun.

Well, it contains a phasier sandwich and stars at least. But that's beside the point.

Well, it contains a phaser sandwich and stars at least. But that’s beside the point.

63. Andorian fans will definitely want these cupcakes at any party.

And these seem especially easy to decorate since they only require white icing and blue antennae. Not sure if the antennae are edible.

And these seem especially easy to decorate since they only require white icing and blue antennae. Not sure if the antennae are edible.

64. I bring a cake of the starship Enterprise boldly going where no cake has gone before.

I guess this cake was meant to display. But it seems someone couldn't resist to take a bite out of this thing.

I guess this cake was meant to display. But it seems someone couldn’t resist to take a bite out of this thing.

65. Wonder where the Enterprise is going on this cake.

I hope it's to a planet that's able to support some kind of life. But as far as the original show goes, you'll never know.

I hope it’s to a planet that’s able to support some kind of life. But as far as the original show goes, you’ll never know.

66. Anyone at Starfleet Command will surely approve of these cupcakes.

Because they come in all 3 uniform colors and have chocolate Starfleet insignia. But I like them anyway.

Because they come in all 3 uniform colors and have chocolate Starfleet insignia. But I like them anyway.

67. These Star Trek pancakes are part of a complete breakfast.

I guess someone spent too much time on these because they sure look like the characters. I don't know why such dishes even exist.

I guess someone spent too much time on these because they sure look like the characters. I don’t know why such dishes even exist.

68. As we all know, these Star Trek gingerbread cookies can’t be beat.

Let me guess, the one in the red shirt isn't Scotty. How was I to know that?

Let me guess, the one in the red shirt isn’t Scotty. How was I to know that?

69. A bento lunch like this is certain to be Starfleet approved.

Well, it consists of stars and the Starfleet insignia. But I think kids will be sure to love this.

Well, it consists of stars and the Starfleet insignia. But I think kids will be sure to love this.

70. Fans of Captain James T. Kirk should always have a cake like this.

For we all know that Kirk has rock hard abs. And once he gets in trouble on the planet, the shirt comes off.

For we all know that Kirk has rock hard abs. And once he gets in trouble on the planet, the shirt comes off.

71. At any Starfleet party, you can’t resist these cupcakes.

After all, they're chocolate and have the Starfleet insignia on them. Look so delicious.

After all, they’re chocolate and have the Starfleet insignia on them. Look so delicious.

72. Fans of TNG will certainly find this Data bento lunch delightful.

Of course, Data will probably won't eat this because he's an android. But this is quite cute.

Of course, Data will probably won’t eat this because he’s an android. But this is quite cute.

73. I guess this cake seems to come with its own scanner.

This one has to be from TNG due to the uniform style. Then again, I'm not sure what that gadget is.

This one has to be from TNG due to the uniform style. Then again, I’m not sure what that gadget is.

74. An Enterprise cake like this is sure to make a fine centerpiece at any Starfleet party.

Well, this looks quite intricately decorated. But it took a lot of time on someone's hands at the bakery.

Well, this looks quite intricately decorated. But it took a lot of time on someone’s hands at the bakery.

75. This 3 layer Borg cake is said to be impossible to resist.

Because resistance to this cake is futile. We know since Captain Picard learned the hard way.

Because resistance to this cake is futile. We know since Captain Picard learned the hard way.

76. Klingon fans would be delighted if a dessert platter contained a cake of a Klingon bird of prey.

That is a cake of a Klingon ship. Best to board this with caution since we know what Klingons are like.

That is a cake of a Klingon ship. Best to board this with caution since we know what Klingons are like.

77. Guess this bridge cake is from the Next Generation.

And it seems to have more people on the bridge than some of the other bridge cakes. Wonder why that is.

And it seems to have more people on the bridge than some of the other bridge cakes. Wonder why that is.

78. Fans of Deep Space Nine might also enjoy a cake of The Defiant.

Well, this kid seems to. Still, I know it's not a classy ship like the Enterprise. But it doesn't have to be.

Well, this kid seems to. Still, I know it’s not a classy ship like the Enterprise. But it doesn’t have to be.

79. Seems like that Star Trek alien dog has a treat of its own, too.

And it seems to bear a rather close resemblance. Still, there weren't a lot of good special effects during the 1960s. They had to make do with what they had.

And it seems to bear a rather close resemblance. Still, there weren’t a lot of good special effects during the 1960s. They had to make do with what they had.

80. Let’s see how this Voyager cake stacks against the Borg Cube.

Well, they apparently seem to be the same size. Guess these two cakes were for a big party.

Well, they apparently seem to be the same size. Guess these two cakes were for a big party.

81. In this part of galaxy nobody could resist these tribble bites.

Because these are bound to cause trouble. However, Klingons are known not to like them.

Because these are bound to cause trouble. However, Klingons are known not to like them.

82. A Star Trek cake like this is said to be a Trekkie’s dessert delight.

Contains the Enterprise, the Vulcan salute, and the 3 Starfleet uniform colors. What more can a Trekkie want?

Contains the Enterprise, the Vulcan salute, and the 3 Starfleet uniform colors. What more can a Trekkie want?

83. These Star Trek cookies are sure to please at any party.

These seem to be based on the original series. Nevertheless, they seem so adorable an almost impossible to resist.

These seem to be based on the original series. Nevertheless, they seem so adorable an almost impossible to resist.

84. When it comes to Star Trek parties, you can’t go wrong with a cake and these cupcakes.

Well, these tend to be more or less inspired by the reboot movies. But at least the cake has Kirk and Spock together.

Well, these tend to be more or less inspired by the reboot movies. But at least the cake has Kirk and Spock together.

85. This pull away cupcake cake is brought to you by a bakery in Starfleet.

Yes, I know I have a lot of cakes on this post. But sometimes you have to make do with what you have.

Yes, I know I have a lot of cakes on this post. But sometimes you have to make do with what you have.

86. Well, at least this cake has a Stardate.

However, I'm not sure what this means. Not sure how they come up with these things in Star Trek.

However, I’m not sure what this means. Not sure how they come up with these things in Star Trek.

87. This Enterprise bento will sure make your kid the envy of other Starfleet cadets.

This one also has an Enterprise sandwich as well as stars. But it doesn't seem as thick as the last one I put on this post.

This one also has an Enterprise sandwich as well as stars. But it doesn’t seem as thick as the last one I put on this post.

88. Guess this starship wants to blow up the Borg cube.

However, I'm not sure if that ship will have any success. Because under the Borg, resistance is futile.

However, I’m not sure if that ship will have any success. Because under the Borg, resistance is futile.

89. These gingerbread Star Trek cookies will surely rock any party at Starfleet Command.

Well, these do tend to have a real homey feel to them. And don't seem to take too much icing.

Well, these do tend to have a real homey feel to them. And don’t seem to take too much icing.

90. A Star Trek bento like this may wish you to live long and prosper.

After all, it says so on the sandwich with cheese. Still, it's quite creative.

After all, it says so on the sandwich with cheese. Still, it’s quite creative.

91. Shoe your love for your favorite Trekkie with this cookie platter.

I guess these cookies are professionally made and are from TNG. Still, they're quite sweet if you ask me.

I guess these cookies are professionally made and are from TNG. Still, they’re quite sweet if you ask me.

92. There are no better chocolates aboard the Enterprise than these candies.

Yes, these are Star Trek chocolates. And yes, some are sure to find them awesome.

Yes, these are Star Trek chocolates. And yes, some are sure to find them awesome.

93. Seems like this cake really reaches for the stars.

Well, it seems to be the Enterprise surrounded by space, the final frontier. Not sure if the Enterprise is edible on this though.

Well, it seems to be the Enterprise surrounded by space, the final frontier. Not sure if the Enterprise is edible on this though.

94. When you can’t get an Enterprise cake, a shuttle one would do just as well.

And this seems like a rather nice cake. However, you don't really see the shuttles on the show very often since they tend to beam up a lot in the transporter.

And this seems like a rather nice cake. However, you don’t really see the shuttles on the show very often since they tend to beam up a lot in the transporter.

95. When it comes to Enterprise cakes, nothing beats homemade.

And it seems like whoever made this, did a very good job. Like the icing detail.

And it seems like whoever made this, did a very good job. Like the icing detail.

96. A redshirt cupcake is always easy to make.

So easy that they always seem expendable at parties. Of course, I think these might be from Next Generation. But you see what I mean.

So easy that they always seem expendable at parties. Of course, I think these might be from Next Generation. But you see what I mean.

97. I guess a cake like this encourages one to boldly go where no man has gone before.

It might be made from a sheet cake, but it's quite clever. Of course, you know the rest of that sentence.

It might be made from a sheet cake, but it’s quite clever. Of course, you know the rest of that sentence.

98. Fans of the Next Generation might enjoy this set of cupcakes.

Well, TNG wasn't the best Star Trek series. But these cupcaeks are so cute. Like Data with his cat.

Well, TNG wasn’t the best Star Trek series. But these cupcaeks are so cute. Like Data with his cat.

99. This set of cookies was made especially for Mr. Sulu.

George Takei received these cookies for his 75th birthday from a bakery. Quite nice of them since I found this on Pinterest.

George Takei received these cookies for his 75th birthday from a bakery. Quite nice of them since I found this on Pinterest.

100. Finally, I’m sure no officers has seen cupcakes like these at Starfleet.

These use buttercream icing by the way. And they're all in 3 different colors, too.

These use buttercream icing by the way. And they’re all in 3 different colors, too.

Star Trek Craft Projects from Garak’s Clothiers

Garaks_Clothiers

As with any franchise with a large fandom, you have some fans who are perfectly content with buying merchandise from large companies seeking to make a profit. And then you have the devotees who wish to make stuff to show their love in their art. Trekkies are no different. Still, in the Star Trek universe while you don’t really have people making stuff, you have Garak’s Clothiers from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Well, let’s just say Garak is the only guy in the franchise who does something that comes close to doing craft projects. After all, he calls himself a tailor by trade and is sees doing some alterations. However, he also does some work on the side and since he’s a Cardassian and friends with Dr. Bashir, you can’t really tell what side he’s on. After all, he did tell Dr. Bashir that he wanted him to come to see him for a new suit at a specified time so he could hear him conversing with two really scary Klingon women. Nevertheless, you have plenty of Trekkies who make craft projects that you might see on Etsy or Pinterest at one time or another. Some of these could be irresistibly adorable. Others, well, might make you wonder what were they thinking. So for your galactic reading pleasure, I give you a treasure trove of Star Trek craft projects.

 

  1. Show your love for Star Trek with this stained glass window.
Well, this sure makes you want to set your phasers to stunning. Because it sure is.

Well, this sure makes you want to set your phasers to stunning. Because it sure is.

2. Make your plants grow boldly like no plant has grown before with this Enterprise flower pot.

Of course, the only way you could really do that is also add some Miracle Gro. But you get what I'm saying.

Of course, the only way you could really do that is also add some Miracle Gro. But you get what I’m saying.

3. Is Spock had a sampler in his cabin, it would say “Live Long and Prosper.”

However, this one includes characters from the original show and The Next Generation. But this is kind of cute.

However, this one includes characters from the original show and The Next Generation. But this is kind of cute.

4. Start your day logically by getting a cup a joe from your very own Spock mug.

Not sure if Spock drinks coffee. But I think this is logically clever if you get my drift. Fascinating.

Not sure if Spock drinks coffee. But I think this is logically clever if you get my drift. Fascinating.

5. Now you can cuddle up with your very own amigurumi Kirk and Spock.

Can't tell which one is cuter. But these are both so adorable as their friendship on the show.

Can’t tell which one is cuter. But these are both so adorable as their friendship on the show.

6. According to what this sampler says, “Adopt a Tribble.”

Then again, it's probably not good advice. Because tribbles have voracious appetites and multiply like crazy.

Then again, it’s probably not good advice. Because tribbles have voracious appetites and multiply like crazy.

7. Of course, couldn’t do a craft post without a wooden Enterprise.

Sure it's only a model. But it's certainly well varnished that you wonder whether the ship has a wood shop.

Sure it’s only a model. But it’s certainly well varnished that you wonder whether the ship has a wood shop.

8. Nothing makes a Trekkie room better than this themed dresser.

Has drawers of 5 different colors. Probably made by some Trekkie with too much time on their hands. But that's just my theory.

Has drawers of 5 different colors. Probably made by some Trekkie with too much time on their hands. But that’s just my theory.

9. If you liked Geordi LaForge from The Next Generation, then you’ll enjoy this handmade visor.

You can either wear this or put it on display. But it still looks quite cool if you ask me.

You can either wear this or put it on display. But it still looks quite cool if you ask me.

10. This sampler is for the ultimate Trekkie who has everything.

This one features the original cast as well as the words you hear from Kirk in the theme. Has a lot of detail as you see.

This one features the original cast as well as the words you hear from Kirk in the theme. Has a lot of detail as you see.

11. For Vulcan ears, it doesn’t hurt to have them crocheted.

Doesn't have a logical look to it. But I'll let this slide since they're quite clever.

Doesn’t have a logical look to it. But I’ll let this slide since they’re quite clever.

12. Raise a toast on the Enterprise with these Starfleet wine glasses.

I guess these are from the Next Generation so I can't joke about Red Shirts. Still, they're wonderfully painted that Guinan will be pleased.

I guess these are from the Next Generation so I can’t joke about Red Shirts. Still, they’re wonderfully painted that Guinan will be pleased.

13. Keep yourself engaged and warm with this Captain Picard quilt.

Man, that really looks like him. Wonder how long it took to make that. Guess Sir Patrick Stewart would be proud.

Man, that really looks like him. Wonder how long it took to make that. Guess Sir Patrick Stewart would be proud.

14. Nothing goes better on your Trekkie couch than these Starfleet uniform fleece pillows.

I guess these feel fuzzy. However, once the red one leaves the couch, it never comes back.

I guess these feel fuzzy. However, once the red one leaves the couch, it never comes back.

15. As we all know, Picard loves his Earl Grey tea that someone made a sampler.

Yes, this is related to Star Trek. Because that's how Picard orders his tea since he likes it hot.

Yes, this is related to Star Trek. Because that’s how Picard orders his tea since he likes it hot.

16. In case you forget, this sampler provides a guide for Starfleet uniforms in the original series.

Remember that gold = command, blue = science, and red = doomed unless you're Scotty or Uhura. Well, at least when they beam down to the planet.

Remember that gold = command, blue = science, and red = doomed unless you’re Scotty or Uhura. Well, at least when they beam down to the planet.

17. Bajoran fans of Deep Space Nine might like an earpiece like this.

Of course, they're only sold one at a time. And aren't recommended for those with delicate ears. But yes, the Bajoran wear earpieces like the one you see here.

Of course, they’re only sold one at a time. And aren’t recommended for those with delicate ears. But yes, the Bajoran wear earpieces like the one you see here.

18. In colder weather, a crocheted Spock hat is a logical choice.

You can tell it's a Vulcan hat because of the ears. Still, wear this when it makes logical sense.

You can tell it’s a Vulcan hat because of the ears. Still, wear this when it makes logical sense.

19. A Star Trek mobile with rainbow Enterprise ships always make a great ceiling decoration.

Because I'm not sure if it's appropriate for a crib height wise. Nevertheless, I like the purple one the best.

Because I’m not sure if it’s appropriate for a crib height wise. Nevertheless, I like the purple one the best.

20. Of course, we all know what a Trekkie says when they walk into a bar…

Yeah, that's about it. Even though Kirk never really said, "Beam me up, Scotty" in the show.

Yeah, that’s about it. Even though Kirk never really said, “Beam me up, Scotty” in the show.

21. Sometimes it helps to carry your things in your very own tricorder.

You know the futuristic technology you see Spock with that's now horribly outdated. Yeah, kids have calculators more sophisticated than that. Still, this is meant to be a replica purse.

You know the futuristic technology you see Spock with that’s now horribly outdated. Yeah, kids have calculators more sophisticated than that. Still, this is meant to be a bag you put on your belt.

22. Boldly go where no man has gone before with this crocheted Enterprise.

Well, it seems to resemble the ship if it was made in yarn. But I still think it's a worthy effort on the creator's part.

Well, it seems to resemble the ship if it was made in yarn. But I still think it’s a worthy effort on the creator’s part.

23. Of course, we should always pay respect to the dearly departed Starfleet security officers.

Here lies a Red Shirt known only to God. Because if we knew who he was, he wouldn't have been killed on that planet in the first place.

Here lies a Red Shirt known only to God. Because if we knew who he was, he wouldn’t have been killed on that planet in the first place.

24. No Starfleet crew member should ever be without their own mug.

Well, this seems official since it has the Starfleet insignia. Better drawing than I could've done that's for sure.

Well, this seems official since it has the Starfleet insignia. Better drawing than I could’ve done that’s for sure.

25. As we all know, sometimes Wesley Crusher really needs to shut up.

Thank you, Captain Picard, for doing us a great service by telling Wesley to shut up. That kid is annoying as hell.

Thank you, Captain Picard, for doing us a great service by telling Wesley to shut up. That kid is annoying as hell.

26. Protect your clothes from the elements of chemicals or food with your very own Starfleet uniform apron.

Never see people in the Starfleet mess halls wear these. Not sure why.

Never see people in the Starfleet mess halls wear these. Not sure why.

27. Grace your home with your very own Spocktopus embroidery sampler.

Yes, I know the image is illogical. But it's still kind of hilarious because it's illogical.

Yes, I know the image is highly illogical. But it’s still kind of hilarious because it’s highly illogical.

28. Never leave your home ship without taking your tricorder purse with you.

For an obsolete futuristic technology, that gadget does make a great purse design. Well, if you use the right colors anyway.

For an obsolete futuristic technology, that gadget does make a great purse design. Well, if you use the right colors anyway.

29. Carry your things with you in this Starfleet purse.

Yes, this is a Starfleet purse since it has the logo. Not sure how much it could fit. But I do like the shiny gold color.

Yes, this is a Starfleet purse since it has the logo. Not sure how much it could fit. But I do like the shiny gold color.

30. Any character from Star Trek: Next Generation can be quite cuddly as an amigurumi.

Then again, TNG isn't the best out of the Star Trek shows. since it gives screentime to some of its least likable characters. But at least this set includes Guinan and Q.

Then again, TNG isn’t the best out of the Star Trek shows. since it gives screentime to some of its least likable characters. But at least this set includes Guinan and Q.

31. Remember, Trekkies, you can never have enough tribble pillows on your couch.

Tribbles must be the easiest Star Trek creatures to make since they're just little puff balls. However, these cuties caused a lot of trouble on the Enterprise in one episode.

Tribbles must be the easiest Star Trek creatures to make since they’re just little puff balls. However, these cuties caused a lot of trouble on the Enterprise in one episode.

32. Looks like these ceramic cows are boldly going where no bull has gone before.

Yes, they made cow versions of Kirk and Spock. Don't ask me why. But neither has udders which you see a lot on male cows in cartoons.

Yes, they made cow versions of Kirk and Spock. Don’t ask me why. But neither has udders which you see a lot on male cows in cartoons.

33. These Starfleet pillows will go well on any Trekkie couch.

Well, as long as your couch is shiny bright orange. Then again, these would've gone great with any furniture from the original series.

Well, as long as your couch is shiny bright orange. Then again, these would’ve gone great with any furniture from the original series.

34. Protect your wooden table tops with this set of canvas Starfleet coasters.

Comes in 3 different colors. But each will protect your tables from drinks equally.

Comes in 3 different colors. But each will protect your tables from drinks equally.

35. This Star Trek quilt of the Enterprise is something any Starfleet cadet might want.

As you see, this quilt depicts the Enterprise from different views. Also, lists the main crew's names by rank.

As you see, this quilt depicts the Enterprise from different views. Also, lists the main crew’s names by rank.

36. No Starfleet should ever be without their own mosaic serving tray.

Like how it's done in mosaics and how it resembles the Enterprise. So pretty.

Like how it’s done in mosaics and how it resembles the Enterprise. So pretty.

37. As Mr. Spock says, always be a Vulcan, not a Vulcan’t.

Okay, he actually didn't say it. But it makes a great wall hanging nevertheless. Like his hand sign.

Okay, he actually didn’t say it. But it makes a great wall hanging nevertheless. Like his hand sign.

38. Protect yourself from hot metals in the kitchen with these crocheted Starfleet pot holders.

Come in 3 different colors. However, you'll probably use the red one the most since it's the color of security. Or maybe the least because the color also means expendable.

Come in 3 different colors. However, you’ll probably use the red one the most since it’s the color of security. Or maybe the least because the color also means expendable.

39. With this Star Trek quilt, you can snuggle up to the final frontier.

Has a lot of Star Trek icons and symbols here. And the squares are of 4 different colors.

Has a lot of Star Trek icons and symbols here. And the squares are of 4 different colors.

40. I’m sure this Spock quilt will certainly provide you some logical warmth.

And yes, it really looks like him. I'm sure the late Leonard Nimoy would be impressed by that patchwork.

And yes, it really looks like him. I’m sure the late Leonard Nimoy would be impressed by that patchwork.

41. You can’t logically go wrong with a Spock sampler.

Didn't know Spock could look this great in emboridery either. Really captures his essence.

Didn’t know Spock could look this great in embroidery either. Really captures his essence.

42. Keep warm like a Klingon warrior with your very own crocheted Worf scarf.

I'm sure Worf doesn't knit or crochet. But that scarf is a very good likeness of his sash he usually wears.

I’m sure Worf doesn’t knit or crochet. But that scarf is a very good likeness of his sash he usually wears.

43. Heard of a pot holder? How about a Spock holder?

Because holding a pot without it doesn't make much logical sense. Oh, well, it does if you use a different pot holder but you get the idea.

Because holding a pot without it doesn’t make much logical sense. Oh, well, it does if you use a different pot holder but you get the idea.

44. Keep your coffee warm longer with these crocheted Starfleet cozies.

Come in 3 different colors. However, not sure whether they allow coffee on the bridge. Or why it doesn't spill whenever the ship's hit.

Come in 3 different colors. However, not sure whether they allow coffee on the bridge. Or why it doesn’t spill whenever the ship’s hit.

45. Nothing makes your home more Trekkie than this Enterprise quilt.

This one depicts the Enterprise and only the Enterprise. Not sure if the red thing is a planet or a star though.

This one depicts the Enterprise and only the Enterprise. Not sure if the red thing is a planet or a star though.

46. When you’re sewing, it helps that you have a Red Shirt pin cushion that’ll keep your pins and needles secure.

Also doubles as a voodoo doll if you want. For obvious reasons. Yeah, the original show had a lot of red shirt security officers die on the planets for some reason.

Also doubles as a voodoo doll if you want. For obvious reasons. Yeah, the original show had a lot of red shirt security officers die on the planets for some reason.

47. Of course, even officers on Starfleet need to keep clean now and then. So keep clean with these designated soaps.

Come in 4 different colors. However, we do know what happens to those who use the red soap.

Come in 4 different colors. However, we do know what happens to those who use the red soap.

48. These peg people consist of the main crew of the original Star Trek Enterprise.

Yes, these are peg people of the original Star Trek cast. Or at least the ones people cared about.

Yes, these are peg people of the original Star Trek cast. Or at least the ones people cared about.

49. Boldly go where no cat has gone before with these Star Trek cat buttons.

I think these cats were from some noted artist who paints scenes with cats in them. I forget her name. But these are funny.

I think these cats were from some noted artist who paints scenes with cats in them. I forget her name. But these are funny.

50. You might know that the amigurumi crew of Star Trek: Enterprise can also be cuddly.

Okay, I know it doesn't consist of the whole crew because I don't see the British security officer who likes to blow things up. Nor do I see Porthos. But it's close enough.

Okay, I know it doesn’t consist of the whole crew because I don’t see the British security officer who likes to blow things up. Nor do I see Porthos. But it’s close enough.

51. This set of Star Trek nesting dolls comes so well together.

Includes Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Uhura, and Scotty. Not sure about the painting style though.

Includes Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Uhura, and Scotty. Not sure about the painting style though.

52. A Spock elephant’s memory is said to be astounding.

Because elephants have remarkable memory. Vulcan elephants have an astounding memory and sense of logic. So this Spock elephant should be superb.

Because elephants have remarkable memory. Vulcan elephants have an astounding memory and sense of logic. So this Spock elephant should be superb.

53. When it comes to cuteness, you can never get enough seeing Captain Picard with puppies.

I'm not sure what made anyone paint this. But I'm positive that at least one of my viewers will find this picture adorable.

I’m not sure what made anyone paint this. But I’m positive that at least one of my viewers will find this picture adorable.

54. For some members of Starfleet, nobody knows the tribbles they’ve seen.

Still, I think this sampler saying is brilliant. Since "Trouble with Tribbles" is such a great episode.

Still, I think this sampler saying is brilliant. Since “Trouble with Tribbles” is such a great episode.

55. On this sampler, whenever Picard makes a command, he makes it so.

This one seems more simple to create than some of the other ones. But that's Picard's most famous words.

This one seems more simple to create than some of the other ones. But that’s Picard’s most famous words.

56. When it comes to whales, the Data one has the most superior skill.

It's a Data whale because it's green like him in TNG. Still, it's adorable to say the least.

It’s a Data whale because it’s green like him in TNG. Still, it’s adorable to say the least.

57. For your Starfleet kitchens, these aprons are ideal.

Since they tend to depict Starfleet uniforms from TNG. Like the black bows on them though.

Since they tend to depict Starfleet uniforms from TNG. Like the black bows on them though.

58. This oven mitt will help you boldly get the roast no man has chowed before.

Well, at least this looks more like standard oven mitt than the one in the last post. This one just has Star Trek characters on it.

Well, at least this looks more like standard oven mitt than the one in the last post. This one just has Star Trek characters on it.

59. These Starfleet crayons would please any kid in the Alpha Quadrant.

Consist of Starfleet logos, the Enterprise, and Vulcan hand signs. But they seem rather well made for any Starfleet coloring book.

Consist of Starfleet logos, the Enterprise, and Vulcan hand signs. But they seem rather well made for any Starfleet coloring book.

60. With this pair of earrings, you can wish everyone to live long and prosper.

Yes, this pair contain the Vulcan hand sign. Not sure if any Vulcans have such earrings though.

Yes, this pair contain the Vulcan hand sign. Not sure if any Vulcans have such earrings though.

61. A necklace with a Starfleet pendant always makes a great gift.

Wonder if this was made by someone with too much time on their hands. Because it looks so ornate.

Wonder if this was made by someone with too much time on their hands. Because it looks so ornate.

62. With this lamp, you’ll be able to boldly go where no man has gone before in the dark.

Okay, not really but it's sure a cool lantern you can find on Etsy. Also makes a great outdoor decoration.

Okay, not really but it’s sure a cool lantern you can find on Etsy. Also makes a great outdoor decoration.

63. Starry, starry, night. Enterprise into the sky.

This is a Star Trek rendition of Van Gogh's Starry Night. Notice it's in space and not in a town. Yet, it's clever.

This is a Star Trek rendition of Van Gogh’s Starry Night. Notice it’s in space and not in a town. Yet, it’s clever.

64. Apparently, TNG peg people seem to have their own Enterprise.

Well, at least one that's made from wood and has wheels. But I think having the original crew instead would be better.

Well, at least one that’s made from wood and has wheels. But I think having the original crew instead would be better.

65. These Star Trek pillows will work wonders for anyone’s head.

Then again, they're probably used for decoration. Includes Kirk, Spock, and Uhura.

Then again, they’re probably used for decoration. Includes Kirk, Spock, and Uhura.

66. Keep your things together on your Star Trek with these Starfleet tote bags.

Come in 3 different colors as you see. And I guess they're from the Next Generation, too.

Come in 3 different colors as you see. And I guess they’re from the Next Generation, too.

67. These Star Trek amigurumi are as adorable as they are evil.

Well, this set doesn't seem to include evil Chekov or Sulu. But it does have Marlena as Kirk's squeeze. Still, it's them from a parallel universe.

Well, this set doesn’t seem to include evil Chekov or Sulu. But it does have Marlena as Kirk’s squeeze. Still, it’s them from a parallel universe.

68. For you Trekkies, celebrate your Hanukkah with this wooden menorah with lights.

Helps to know that Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner are Jews, too. Also like how Gorn's included.

Helps to know that Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner are Jews, too. Also like how Gorn’s included.

69. Your plant is guaranteed to grow logically with this Spock flower pot.

Well, as long as you give it plenty of sun and water, too. Not including that would be highly illogical.

Well, as long as you give it plenty of sun and water, too. Not including that would be highly illogical.

70. Those who like Voyager might adore them as amigurumi as well.

Sure it's not the best Star Trek series. But you have to admit, these are cute.

Sure it’s not the best Star Trek series. But you have to admit, these are cute.

71. Cuddle up on your couch with Star Trek pillows of Kirk and Spock.

Yes, Kirk and Spock have gotten the felt treatment. Other Star Trek characters received it as well according to Etsy.

Yes, Kirk and Spock have gotten the felt treatment. Other Star Trek characters received it as well according to Etsy.

72. Your money will be safe in these Starfleet change purses.

However, it's best not to keep any gold plated latinum in there. Well, at least when you're among the Ferengi.

However, it’s best not to keep any gold plated latinum in there. Well, at least when you’re among the Ferengi.

73. A sampler like this always calls for adventure.

Well, this looks rather well done. The Starfleet logo and stars look quite intricate and everything.

Well, this looks rather well done. The Starfleet logo and stars look quite intricate and everything.

74. This Spock pillow is a logical place to rest your head.

And here he is with the Vulcan hand sign. Guess rest is essential if you want to live long and prosper.

And here he is with the Vulcan hand sign. Guess rest is essential if you want to live long and prosper.

75. A Starfleet issued quilt is guaranteed to keep you warm from the coldness of space.

Well, this one is interesting since it's made from triangle pieces. Not sure if you'd want it on a fence.

Well, this one is interesting since it’s made from triangle pieces. Not sure if you’d want it on a fence.

76. These Starfleet necklaces are guaranteed to look great on any officer.

Comes in 3 different colors for each Starfleet shirt. However, those who wear the red one shouldn't beam down to planets.

Comes in 3 different colors for each Starfleet shirt. However, those who wear the red one shouldn’t beam down to planets.

77. Set your drinks on these quality Starfleet coasters.

Guess one's for black coffee and the other's for hot tea. And the Starfleet insignia looks different on each.

Guess one’s for black coffee and the other’s for hot tea. And the Starfleet insignia looks different on each.

78. This sampler will always help ensure you live long and prospurr.

Yes, it's a Spock cat sampler hanging. And yes, it's as adorable as can be. He even makes the Vulcan sign with his paw.

Yes, it’s a Spock cat sampler hanging. And yes, it’s as adorable as can be. He even makes the Vulcan sign with his paw.

79. When you’re on the go, these TNG finger puppets can always be with you.

While TNG is quite overrated, these puppets are quite adorable. Also, like how they're in an envelope.

While TNG is quite overrated, these puppets are quite adorable. Also, like how they’re in an envelope.

80. A laptop bag like this will help your computer live long and prosper.

Costs $186.00 on Etsy. But it sure looks well made to be worth every penny.

Costs $186.00 on Etsy. But it sure looks well made to be worth every penny.

81. These owl Kirk and Spock plushies are sure to be a hoot.

And here's the Spock owl with the tricorder. At any rate, these are surely creative and adorable.

And here’s the Spock owl with the tricorder. At any rate, these are surely creative and adorable.

82. A Starfleet charm bracelet looks great on any officer.

Has Starfleet insignia and beads in 3 different colors. So it will match any Starfleet uniform.

Has Starfleet insignia and beads in 3 different colors. So it will match any Starfleet uniform.

83. In case of a cold, this Starfleet kleenex box will give you the relief you need.

Well, as long as you fill it with tissues, no less. Also made out of wood by the way.

Well, as long as you fill it with tissues, no less. Also made out of wood by the way.

84. A hard drive Enterprise can certainly fly quite well.

Someone made this Enterprise from parts. Among them was an old computer hard drive. Clever.

Someone made this Enterprise from parts. Among them was an old computer hard drive. Clever.

85. Nothing can be more irresistible to the Federation than a Star Trek chibi set.

Includes characters from TNG and the original series. And yes, they're all equally adorable.

Includes characters from TNG and the original series. And yes, they’re all equally adorable.

86. No Trekkie home could be complete without a tribble rug.

Given that it's a tribble rug, this is probably easy to make. But at least the tribbles in your home won't multiply like crazy.

Given that it’s a tribble rug, this is probably easy to make. But at least the tribbles in your home won’t multiply like crazy.

87. A duct tape Starfleet wallet will always keep your cash secure.

Just make sure it doesn't fall into a Ferengi's hands. Since Ferengi are quite greedy and shouldn't be trusted with money.

Just make sure it doesn’t fall into a Ferengi’s hands. Since Ferengi are quite greedy and shouldn’t be trusted with money.

88. Keep your neck warm with this fleece Starfleet scarf.

I'm sure such a scarf like this will keep you logically warm. Well, at least at the neck anyway.

I’m sure such a scarf like this will keep you logically warm. Well, at least at the neck anyway.

89. A pillow like this is guaranteed to help you live long and prosper.

After all, it contains the Vulcan salute on it. So I'm sure it'll give you comfort in some way.

After all, it contains the Vulcan salute on it. So I’m sure it’ll give you comfort in some way.

90. As Captain Picard would say while baking cookies, “Bake it so.”

I have to admit, that's pretty clever to put on a Star Trek oven mitt. However, I'm not sure if Captain Picard bakes in his spare time.

I have to admit, that’s pretty clever to put on a Star Trek oven mitt. However, I’m not sure if Captain Picard bakes in his spare time.

91. When it comes to bead work, this Captain Picard portrait takes the cake.

Now that also looks quite like him. Didn't know you can master something like this with beads. Amazing.

Now that also looks quite like him. Didn’t know you can master something like this with beads. Amazing.

92. For those who need solace, these Star Trek prayer candles are just what you need.

Consists of Kirk, Spock, and Sulu. Made by some company on Etsy. Still, these are quite funny.

Consists of Kirk, Spock, and Sulu. Made by some company on Etsy. Still, these are quite funny.

93. This wooden Starfleet box is sure to keep your belongings safe and secure.

Well, it's probably more for decoration. But it's sure to go well with the red uniform.

Well, it’s probably more for decoration. But it’s sure to go well with the red uniform.

94. No Trekkie girl’s wardrobe could be complete without a Starfleet insignia skirt.

Sure it might not go with any Starfleet uniform. But I'm positive those at the Trekkie convention would love it.

Sure it might not go with any Starfleet uniform. But I’m positive those at the Trekkie convention would love it.

95. For Trekkies, home is always the Bridge.

Because on the Enterprise, most of the action happens there. Still, this is pretty cool.

Because on the Enterprise, most of the action happens there. Still, this is pretty cool.

96. A Spock pendant necklace is always a logical jewelry choice.

Helps that the Spock on this is painted. Also like the frame and chain.

Helps that the Spock on this is painted. Also like the frame and chain.

97. No female officer in Starfleet is well dressed without her Starfleet command earrings.

Comes in 2 variations. Available on Etsy. Nevertheless, so pretty.

Comes in 2 variations. Available on Etsy. Nevertheless, so pretty.

98. It’s only logical that you should have a Spock plate in a china closet.

Well, for display anyway. Not sure about him being surrounded by flowers.

Well, for display anyway. Not sure about him being surrounded by flowers.

99. Keep dry on the Enterprise with your very own Federation uniform towel.

Available in 3 different colors with the insignia embroidered. Will go well in an Trekkie bathroom.

Available in 3 different colors with the insignia embroidered. Will go well in an Trekkie bathroom.

100. Finally, while Kirk and Picard might drink different things, they both keep their beverages in a Federation mug.

Not sure if they have these any Starfleet mess hall. But you kind of think they should.

Not sure if they have these any Starfleet mess hall. But you kind of think they should.

Starfleet Approved Star Trek Merchandise from the Final Frontier

TOS_2x13_TheTroubleWithTribbles0375-Trekpulse

Like any major franchise that attracts a wide range of popularity, Star Trek has always come with a line of merchandise. After all, Trekkies do consist of a viable market. And yes, there are plenty of Star Trek stuff you can imagine. Like space, Star Trek’s product range is infinite. Of course, this doesn’t mean you should buy a tribble any time soon. Because it’s a reason why certain pets are no longer allowed on the Enterprise. Sure Uhura may be a smart girl, but she shouldn’t have bought a tribble from a mysterious vender. Because tribbles breed like rabbits and eat like crazy. However, they don’t like Klingons. Nevertheless, these cute little parasites certainly help make a great Star Trek episode that’s among the most love. Still, outside the Star Trek universe, you’ll find plenty of ridiculous Star Trek gear in this side of the galaxy. And that’s where I bring you. So for your reading pleasure in the Alpha Quadrant, I give you some of the great products from the final frontier. Starfleet approved, I must say.

 

  1. For added buzz, try some Romulan Ale.
However, since it's an energy drink, it's about as bad for you in this universe as in Star Trek. It's even more harmful in Star Trek that it's been banned from the Federation of Planets.

However, since it’s an energy drink, it’s about as bad for you in this universe as in Star Trek. It’s even more harmful in Star Trek that it’s been banned from the Federation of Planets.

2. Now you can bake like Spock with your very own Vulcan sign oven mitt.

Of course, if you bake some treats with this mitt, you're certain not to live long and prosper. Still, you can't help but like this.

Of course, if you bake some treats with this mitt, you’re certain not to live long and prosper. Still, you can’t help but like this.

3. If you want to eat like the O’Briens you might prefer this Star Trek sushi action set.

Here the Enterprise serves as a sushi sauce dish. Not sure about the chopsticks though. But I think they're plastic.

Here the Enterprise serves as a sushi sauce dish. Not sure about the chopsticks though. But I think they’re plastic.

4. For finer diner, perhaps a bottle of Chateau Picard might suit you quite nicely.

This vintage is from a vineyard from 2267. Which is about over 200 years into the future.

This vintage is from a vineyard from 2267. Which is about over 200 years into the future.

5. For the Trekkie cat, resistance to a scratching post like this is futile.

Not sure if there are any feline fans of Star Trek. But this does have a scratch post of the Enterprise and a Klingon ship.

Not sure if there are any feline fans of Star Trek. But this does have a scratch post of the Enterprise and a Klingon ship.

6. When Worf needs to open an envelope, he uses a Bat’leth opener.

Wait a minute, wouldn't they use e-mail or something more sophisticated in the future? I thought so.

Wait a minute, wouldn’t they use e-mail or something more sophisticated in the future? I thought so.

7. As far as bath toys are concerned, this Spock rubber duckie is a logical choice.

Yes, I know it's not logical to depict Spock as a cute bath toy. But hey, this is kind of adorable.

Yes, I know it’s not logical to depict Spock as a cute bath toy. But hey, this is kind of adorable.

8. Learn how to make your own Star Trek costumes with this book.

The costumes in my last post seem more convincing than this. Besides, these look pretty lame compared to what you'd see at a Trekkie convention.

The costumes in my last post seem more convincing than this. Besides, these look pretty lame compared to what you’d see at a Trekkie convention.

9. Put your night to a logical start by wearing a Spock thong.

Really? A Spock thong? Seriously, that's one of the most illogical things you can put Spock's face on. A Kirk thong would make more sense.

Really? A Spock thong? Seriously, that’s one of the most illogical things you can put Spock’s face on. A Kirk thong would make more sense.

10. Be the big guy on the bridge with your very own Captain Kirk chair.

It's a life size replica of Kirk's chair. So I guess this means it must be very expensive. Probably not worth it.

It’s a life size replica of Kirk’s chair. So I guess this means it must be very expensive. Probably not worth it.

11. Nothing makes a more appropriate mess hall utensil than a Star Trek spork.

Really, a Star Trek spork? This is a highly illogical dining utensil, especially if it doesn't come in a set.

Really, a Star Trek spork? This is a highly illogical dining utensil, especially if it doesn’t come in a set.

12. If you love the music from Star Trek, take a moment to listen to Leonard Nimoy’s album, Mr. Spock’s Music from Outer Space.

On second thought, to listen to his album you have to be out of your Vulcan mind. Even more so if you think Nimoy's music video on the Hobbit was anything to be taken seriously.

On second thought, to listen to his album you have to be out of your Vulcan mind. Even more so if you think Nimoy’s music video on the Hobbit was anything to be taken seriously. Yes, it’s that bad.

13. If you like TNG, celebrate the season with a commemorative ornament on your tree of Captain Picard’s assimilation.

Because nothing depicts the joy of Christmas like a beloved Star Trek captain being kidnapped and changed into a mindless cyborg killing machine. Seriously, Hallmark, this is really fucked up.

Because nothing depicts the joy of Christmas like a beloved Star Trek captain being kidnapped and changed into a mindless cyborg killing machine. Seriously, Hallmark, this is really fucked up.

14. Pon Farr cologne is the perfect fragrance to set you in the mood when the time is right.

Which for Vulcans is every 7 years when they mate. However, you really don't want to be anywhere near Vulcans when they're horny.

Which for Vulcans is every 7 years when they mate. However, you really don’t want to be anywhere near Vulcans when they’re horny. Makes me wonder when Spock and Uhura’s first time will be like in the new movies. Well, when Spock’s going through Pon Farr, anyway.

15. For galactic marshmallow fun, you can’t go wrong with a Star Trek marshmallow dispenser.

What the hell? Seriously, why would anyone have a marshmallow dispenser. That's ridiculous. Let alone one as a Star Trek tie-in product.

What the hell? Seriously, why would anyone have a marshmallow dispenser. That’s ridiculous. Let alone one as a Star Trek tie-in product.

16. Grace your tree this Christmas with an ornament of Spock’s farewell to Kirk from Wrath of Khan.

Because nothing brings out the joy of Christmas seeing Kirk and Spock saying goodbye before Spock sacrifices his life for the crew. Sure he gets better, but, Hallmark, is this an appropriate Christmas ornament? Really?

Because nothing brings out the joy of Christmas seeing Kirk and Spock saying goodbye before Spock sacrifices his life for the crew. Sure he gets better, but, Hallmark, is this an appropriate Christmas ornament? Really?

17. In the Federation of Planets, latinum is a general currency.

However, this is probably not real latinum and bound to leave Quark quite angry and disappointed. And this is a guy who takes his money seriously.

However, this is probably not real latinum and bound to leave Quark quite angry and disappointed. And this is a guy who takes his money seriously.

18. Cook some old Star Trek favorites with your very own Star Trek cookbook.

Not sure about having Neelix on the cover though his bad food has more to do with lack of ingredients than anything. Still, some recipes might make you feel like Alan Rickman in Galaxy Quest when he sarcastically remarks, "Just like Mummy used to make."

Not sure about having Neelix on the cover though his bad food has more to do with lack of ingredients than anything. Still, some recipes might make you feel like Alan Rickman in Galaxy Quest when he sarcastically remarks, “Just like Mummy used to make.”

19. When you think tomorrow will never come, try Red Shirt cologne today.

So if you're a Starfleet security officer assigned planet duty, try Red Shirt cologne. Because chances are, you're coming back.

So if you’re a Starfleet security officer assigned planet duty, try Red Shirt cologne. Because chances are, you’re coming back.

20. Nothing graces your china cabinet like a Star Trek Faberge egg.

Yes, this exists. Not sure what makes Star Trek appropriate for a Faberge egg. But I'm sure some rich Trekkie would buy it.

Yes, this exists. Not sure what makes Star Trek appropriate for a Faberge egg. But I’m sure some rich Trekkie would buy it.

21. Like Star Trek: TNG? Then check out these action figures of your favorite characters when they’re seniors.

The Farmer Captain Picard is especially hilarious because Sir Patrick Stewart is 75 and looks very much the same as he did then. Also, why do they have Data even age?

The Farmer Captain Picard is especially hilarious because Sir Patrick Stewart is 75 and looks very much the same as he did then. Also, why do they have Data even age?

22. For Andorian fans, here’s an action figure for you.

From The Robot's Voice: "The host of the 23rd century version of What Not to Wear, the Andorian can help you prep for your date with Captain Kirk or give you advice on how to handle a pissy Vulcan who is experiencing Ponn Farr. Unless he (she?) gets suffocated by some sort of pink fabric monster first. Or could all that pink on the figure just be inflammation of some kind? Better break out the space penicillin to be sure."

From The Robot’s Voice: “The host of the 23rd century version of What Not to Wear, the Andorian can help you prep for your date with Captain Kirk or give you advice on how to handle a pissy Vulcan who is experiencing Ponn
Farr. Unless he (she?) gets suffocated by some sort of pink fabric monster
first. Or could all that pink on the figure just be inflammation of some kind? Better break out the space penicillin to be sure.”

23. Nothing looks better on a formal suit than a pair of cufflinks depicting a logo for the United Federation of Planets.

Let me be frank, I don't think you'd be taken seriously with cufflinks like these unless you're at a Star Trek convention. Seriously, why?

Let me be frank, I don’t think you’d be taken seriously with cufflinks like these unless you’re at a Star Trek convention. Seriously, why?

24. Smoking Trekkies out there might like a cigarette case depicting the first ever Vulcan breast meld.

This has to be photoshopped. Otherwise, bad Spock. You're a really dirty Vulcan man, Spock. I thought you were better than that.

This has to be photoshopped. Otherwise, bad Spock. You’re a really dirty Vulcan man, Spock. I thought you were better than that.

25. Bake a pie out of this world with this Star Trek dish.

Instead of "Beam me up, Scotty," it says, "Eat me up, Scotty." Then again, I'm sure Scotty has an appetite for pastries and whiskey.

Instead of “Beam me up, Scotty,” it says, “Eat me up, Scotty.” Then again, I’m sure Scotty has an appetite for pastries and whiskey.

26. To impress the Trekkie in your life, these nipple pasties will sure please.

Well, I guess I know what the strippers are wearing at a Trekkie convention. Still, these are ridiculous.

Well, I guess I know what the strippers are wearing at a Trekkie convention. Still, these are ridiculous.

27.  No pizza night in the Alpha Quadrant is complete without a pizza cutter of the Enterprise.

Then again, the Enterprise does resemble a pizza cutter. Still, not sure what the pizzas on the ship would look like. Maybe I don't want to know.

Then again, the Enterprise does resemble a pizza cutter. Still, not sure what the pizzas on the ship would look like. Maybe I don’t want to know.

28. For a planetary golfer, this set will sure help their game.

Of course, you'll never see the red putter and golf balls again after use. Still, I think this is crazy. But I'm not a fan of golf.

Of course, you’ll never see the red putter and golf balls again after use. Still, I think this is crazy. But I’m not a fan of golf.

29. For Christmas, celebrate the spirit of the season with a commemorative Hallmark ornament of Kirk and Spock’s fight on Vulcan on what should’ve been his wedding.

Because nothing brings out the spirit of Christmas than your fiancee having you fight your best friend so she won't have to marry you. Of course, it would've been avoided if Spock just dumped her so she could be with the guy she wants.

Because nothing brings out the spirit of Christmas than your fiancee having you fight your best friend to the death so she won’t have to marry you. Of course, it would’ve been avoided if Spock just dumped her so she could be with the guy she wants.

30. Fans of “Menagerie” might enjoy this Captain Pike ornament on their Christmas tree.

Because nothing says Christmas like seeing a a guy in a wheelchair after he's been paralyzed and badly injured from an explosion. I don't know why the people at Hallmark thought this was a great idea.

Because nothing says Christmas like seeing a a guy in a wheelchair after he’s been paralyzed and badly injured from an explosion. I don’t know why the people at Hallmark thought this was a great idea.

31. If you like “The Man Trap,” then you’ll probably enjoy a Hallmark ornament of Kirk with the creature from that episode.

For nothing says Christmas like being attacked by a creature that seems to resemble a zombie Abominable Snowman. They're just hugging each other I promise (sarcasm).

For nothing says Christmas like being attacked by a creature that seems to resemble a zombie Abominable Snowman. They’re just hugging each other I promise (sarcasm).

32. Celebrate your galactic Christmas with this Hallmark ornament commemorating Kirk’s epic fight with Gorn.

For nothing says, "Peace on Earth" than being trapped on a planet and forced to fight a humanoid Godzilla like alien to the death against your will in a trial by combat. To be fair, this is a reason why "Arena" turns out to be an unintentionally funny episode.

For nothing says, “Peace on Earth” than being trapped on a planet and forced to fight a humanoid Godzilla like alien to the death against your will in a trial by combat. To be fair, this is a reason why “Arena” turns out to be an unintentionally funny episode.

33. Shirtless Kirk cologne is bound to make you feel like a man who’s just escaped with his life on a hostile planet.

For the male Starfleet captain who's beamed in the nick of time when in an extremely dangerous situation that he only escapes after his shirt's been ripped off his back. Dead red shirt security officers not included.

For the male Starfleet captain who’s beamed in the nick of time when in an extremely dangerous situation that he only escapes after his shirt’s been ripped off his back. Dead red shirt security officers not included.

34. For amusement, it’s said that there’s no better board game for warriors than Klingon Monopoly.

Uh, I'm not sure you'd want to see Klingons playing Monopoly. I guess the winner is the one who's left standing or is still alive.

Uh, I’m not sure you’d want to see Klingons playing Monopoly. I guess the winner is the one who’s left standing or is still alive.

35.  There’s no better beer for a Klingon warrior’s thirst after a battle than War Nog.

And let's hope that Klingons have a very high tolerance for alcohol. Because you really don't want to be near a bunch of Klingons if they're drunk. Or angry. Or horny. Or partying.

And let’s hope that Klingons have a very high tolerance for alcohol. Because you really don’t want to be near a bunch of Klingons if they’re drunk. Or angry. Or horny. Or partying.

36. Plan your trip to the final frontier with your very own Star Trek casket or urn.

Caskets come in 3 variations such as Klingon, Delta Quadrant, and United Federation of Planets. Still, I'm sure it's going to cost much more than a normal casket would.

Caskets come in 3 variations such as Klingon, Delta Quadrant, and United Federation of Planets. Still, I’m sure it’s going to cost much more than a normal casket would.

37. If you prefer a more Trekkie worthy sendoff, this photon torpedo coffin is just for you.

This was inspired by Spock's coffin that was launched in space after he died in Wrath of Khan. Still, I'm not sure if even a die hard Trekkie would buy this or afford it.

This was inspired by Spock’s coffin that was launched in space after he died in Wrath of Khan. Still, I’m not sure if even a die hard Trekkie would buy this or afford it.

38. Star Trek Fun Pix Eggo waffles are part of this galactic breakfast.

Eggo issued these in 2009 when the first reboot Star Trek came out. Of course, let go of Spock's Eggos or you'll find yourself on the receiving end of a Vulcan nerve pinch.

Eggo issued these in 2009 when the first reboot Star Trek came out. Of course, let go of Spock’s Eggos or you’ll find yourself on the receiving end of a Vulcan nerve pinch.

39. Any Star Trek fan is bound to want a limited edition of Star Trek Into Darkness Blue-Ray DVD with piece of a meteorite from the Nantan meteor shower in 1516.

From What Culture: "Now why wouldn't you take a 497-year old meteorite and carve it into a Star Trek symbol, and then glue it onto a DVD case for a one-off edition of Star Trek Into Darkness on Blu-Ray? Called the Meteorite edition, with a limited edition of one, this was given away as a prize win for Total Film magazine earlier in the year. It is bonkers. Next we'll have dinosaur bones carved into toothpicks to promote Colgate toothpaste. The meteorite itself fell in 1516 AD in the Guangxi-Zhaung province of China from the Nantan meteorite shower. It has to be the most ridiculous limited edition bonus item I've ever seen with a home media release. At least thankfully they didn't do a run of a thousand of these."

From What Culture: “Now why wouldn’t you take a 497-year old meteorite and carve it into a Star Trek symbol, and then glue it onto a DVD case for a one-off edition of Star Trek Into Darkness on Blu-Ray? Called the Meteorite edition, with a limited edition of one, this was given away as a prize win for Total Film magazine earlier in the year. It is bonkers. Next we’ll have dinosaur bones carved into toothpicks to promote Colgate toothpaste. The meteorite itself fell in 1516 AD in the Guangxi-Zhaung province of China from the Nantan meteorite shower. It has to be the most ridiculous limited edition bonus item I’ve ever seen with a home media release. At least thankfully they didn’t do a run of a thousand of these.”

40. As we all know Picard always loves his Earl Grey tea. Hot.

Nevertheless, they have a special Star Trek line for that. However, you can buy Earl Grey basically anywhere.

Nevertheless, they have a special Star Trek line for that. However, you can buy Earl Grey basically anywhere.

41. Find your own buried treasure with your very own Star Trek metal detector.

From The Robot's Voice: "Because being seen on the beach with a metal detector wasn?t cool enough, you really need to add the Star Trek logo to the equation. Seriously, if you like Trek, you’re going to be in reasonable danger of having sand kicked in your face by some tan, toned bastard anyways during any beach trip anyways. Carrying a Star Trek metal detector with you is like carrying a sign saying “please punch me and never stop.” If this was a potential beating detector, it would never stop bleeping."

From The Robot’s Voice: “Because being seen on the beach with a metal detector wasn?t cool enough, you really need to add the Star Trek logo to the equation. Seriously, if you like Trek, you’re going to be in reasonable danger of having sand kicked in your face by some tan, toned bastard anyways during any beach trip anyways. Carrying a Star Trek metal detector with you is like carrying a sign saying “please punch me and never stop.” If this was a potential beating detector, it would never stop bleeping.”

42. Entertain your Trekkie guests at dinner with this Star Trek: TNG murder mystery kit.

From The Robot's Voice: "Combining the nerdy pursuit of Star Trek LARPing with the arguably less nerdy pursuit of a murder mystery game isn?t exactly on the chocolate/peanut butter scale. Worse, since the game’s makers clearly thought all Trek fans had the emotional stability of a developmentally challenged child, it’s not even a “murder” mystery?some stupid orb from some stupid planet gets stolen, and players have to figure who did that instead. The most shameful part is the booklet (I admit I bought one)?it suggests that the character playing Worf attempt to do their own makeup."

From The Robot’s Voice: “Combining the nerdy pursuit of Star Trek LARPing with the arguably less nerdy pursuit of a murder mystery game isn?t exactly on the chocolate/peanut butter scale. Worse, since the game’s makers clearly thought all Trek fans had the emotional stability of a developmentally challenged child, it’s not even a “murder” mystery?some stupid orb from some stupid planet gets stolen, and players have to figure who did that instead. The most shameful part is the booklet (I admit I bought one)?it suggests that the character playing Worf attempt to do their own makeup.”

43. Explore the final frontier with your very own Star Trek Astro helmet.

This looks more appropriate for a bug costume.How this came to exist is one of those great unsolved mysteries.

This looks more appropriate for a bug costume.How this came to exist is one of those great unsolved mysteries.

44. Nothing graces your Christmas tree more than a Borg cube ornament.

For nothing shows the spirit of Christmas like a space craft that's known to turn people and aliens into mindless, killing cyborgs. Resistance is futile.

For nothing shows the spirit of Christmas like a space craft that’s known to turn people and aliens into mindless, killing cyborgs. Resistance is futile.

45. Those who liked Star Trek: Voyager might enjoy these figures of Species 8472 with Ensign Harry Kim.

From The Robot's Voice: "When not ripping off plots and supporting characters from Star Trek: The Next Generation, Voyager loved patting itself on the back for everything from the half-robot broad in the spandex to the thrills that came from Tom and B’Ellana’s domestic problems. This self-aggrandizing reached its apex in 1997 when the series presented Trek’s first-ever CGI villain, Species 8472. Hopes were high that the creatures would become as beloved as the Borg–who were quickly brought in as the alien race’s enemies in yet another shameless grab for ratings when no one cared about the new foe. These days, Species 8472 is a reminder of the glut of poor CGI that dominated late-1990s sci-fi. Released in a two-pack with a Harry Kim that is apparently covered in shit, the figure looks more realistic than the actual creature did. Not that that justifies its existence or anything."

From The Robot’s Voice: “When not ripping off plots and supporting characters from Star
Trek: The Next Generation, Voyager loved patting itself on the back for everything from the half-robot broad in the spandex to the thrills that
came from Tom and B’Ellana’s domestic problems. This self-aggrandizing reached
its apex in 1997 when the series presented Trek’s first-ever CGI villain, Species 8472. Hopes were high that the creatures would become as beloved as the Borg–who were quickly brought in as the alien race’s enemies in yet another shameless grab for ratings when no one cared about the new foe. These days, Species 8472 is a reminder of the glut of poor CGI that dominated late-1990s
sci-fi. Released in a two-pack with a Harry Kim that is apparently covered in shit, the figure looks more realistic than the actual creature did. Not that that justifies its existence or anything.”

46. Those who like Spock might enjoy their very own Spock helmet.

From The Robot's Voice: "After Spock lost his brain (in the single greatest Trek episode ever written), Captain Kirk made him wear this Brain Protector Helmet which had a siren in case anyone tried to steal it. Wait, that’s not right. This is actually just a phenomenally stupid toy that some cheap-ass toymaker decided to put Spock’s name on, and another easy way to make certain you get beaten up at school. However, we?d pay 20 bucks to see Leonard Nimoy put one on." I can't think of any logical reason why this exists. Someone must be out of their Vulcan mind.

From The Robot’s Voice: “After Spock lost his brain (in the single greatest Trek episode ever written), Captain Kirk made him wear this Brain Protector Helmet which had a siren in case anyone tried to steal it. Wait, that’s not right. This is actually just a phenomenally stupid toy that some cheap-ass toymaker decided to put Spock’s name on, and another easy way to make certain you get beaten up at school. However, we?d pay 20 bucks to see Leonard Nimoy put one on.” I can’t think of any logical reason why this exists. Someone must be out of their Vulcan mind.

47. Put your earthly remains in your very own Starfleet urn.

Guess these are for the die hard Trek fans who can't afford to have their ashes launched into space. Still, this is ridiculous.

Guess these are for the die hard Trek fans who can’t afford to have their ashes launched into space. Still, this is ridiculous.

48. For your galactic game room, you can’t go wrong with this Star Trek Into Darkness pool table.

Said to have LED lights. However, I'm not sure why anyone would want to buy this. And it's probably as expensive as hell.

Said to have LED lights. However, I’m not sure why anyone would want to buy this. And it’s probably as expensive as hell.

49. Those who want to go where no turtle has gone before would certainly enjoy a set of Star Trek Ninja Turtles.

I know I had these on another post from last year. But still, Star Trek Ninja Turtles seem as idiotic as they sound. Seriously, why?

I know I had these on another post from last year. But still, Star Trek Ninja Turtles seem as idiotic as they sound. Seriously, why?

50. For those who liked, “Mirror, Mirror,” this commemorative ornament of Evil Spock using mind meld on Dr. McCoy is a must have.

For nothing makes Christmas more special than using a mind meld on your friend as a form of torture in an alternate universe. Yeah, I don't know what Hallmark was thinking either.

For nothing makes Christmas more special than using a mind meld on your friend as a form of torture in an alternate universe. Yeah, I don’t know what Hallmark was thinking either.

51. Make it so with the lady Trekkie in your life with this Enterprise engagement ring.

On second thought, you're probably better off to engage with a standard ring. Just to be on the safe side.

On second thought, you’re probably better off to engage with a standard ring. Just to be on the safe side.

52. No Christmas in the Alpha Quadrant could ever be without Kirk and Spock nutcrackers.

Yes, these are Kirk and Spock nutcrackers. But their existence tends to defy logic other than the incentive to make money that is.

Yes, these are Kirk and Spock nutcrackers. But their existence tends to defy logic other than the incentive to make money that is.

53. Answer your own calls like a Trekkie with your very own Enterprise phone.

Yes, it looks cool. However, it looks like you could injure your arm picking up this thing. Wonder how you'd explain that.

Yes, it looks cool. However, it looks like you could injure your arm picking up this thing. Wonder how you’d explain that.

54. Please the Trekkie in your life with a set of panties from The Next Generation.

Well, at least in TNG, red doesn't mean expendable. Still, I know what you're thinking. These are ridiculous.

Well, at least in TNG, red doesn’t mean expendable. Still, I know what you’re thinking. These are ridiculous.

55. If you liked Riker from The Next Generation, then you’ll certainly like this Hallmark Christmas ornament of him.

Don't know about you but this looks as if Riker is seems like he's squatting down and about to take a shit. Yeah, I know it's hilarious.

Don’t know about you but this looks as if Riker is seems like he’s squatting down and about to take a shit. Yeah, I know it’s hilarious.

56. Want to sound commanding on the road, then these Star Trek car horns are just for you.

Now hearing the Star Trek theme from you will make it known to other drivers that someone cut you in traffic. Or that you're a jerk who likes to show off your geekyness to the world.

Now hearing the Star Trek theme from you will make it known to other drivers that someone cut you in traffic. Or that you’re a jerk who likes to show off your geekyness to the world.

57. Turn the lights down with this Star Trek Voice Activated Light Switch & Dimmer.

For those who like to imitate Picard's commands as well as are too lazy to use a light switch. Available at Klear Gear.

For those who like to imitate Picard’s commands as well as are too lazy to use a light switch. Available at Klear Gear.

58. Trekkies who like Peanuts will certainly adore a figurine of Woodstock Spock.

While he's logical to a fault, he only utters in lines. However, I'm sure Snoopy Kirk is bound to hump on any hot alien chick that moves.

While he’s logical to a fault, he only utters in lines. However, I’m sure Snoopy Kirk is bound to hump on any hot alien chick that moves.

59. Nothing makes a Trek Christmas like a Captain’s yule log.

I think it comes in a gift set. Still, looks like a chocolate roll covered in Easter M&Ms.

I think it comes in a gift set. Still, looks like a chocolate roll covered in Easter M&Ms.

60. Galactic rail enthusiasts would love to see Trek meat the tracks with this Star Trek train set.

By the way, this isn't a toy. It's a collectible. Yeah, I don't know what connection Star Trek has to trains either. A commemorative Harry Potter train set would make more sense.

By the way, this isn’t a toy. It’s a collectible. Yeah, I don’t know what connection Star Trek has to trains either. A commemorative Harry Potter train set would make more sense.

61. Tiberius cologne is sure to make you smell like a Starfleet captain boldly going where no man has gone before with the ladies.

As we know of Captain Kirk's reputation with the ladies. Side effects might include contracting alien STDs or unplanned pregnancy, especially for men.

As we know of Captain Kirk’s reputation with the ladies. Side effects might include contracting alien STDs or unplanned pregnancy, especially for men.

62. Sulu cologne is perfect for the man who does everything.

Of course, this doesn't mean he's going to get as much tail as Kirk on the Enterprise. But at least he'll have some skill with a sword.

Of course, this doesn’t mean he’s going to get as much tail as Kirk on the Enterprise. But at least he’ll have some skill with a sword.

63. Keep your money secure in the Alpha Quadrant with your very own Ferengi Savings bank.

However, if you're traveling through space, remember to never put your money in a Ferengi bank. Seriously, these guys are known for being greedy and you won't get your money back.

However, if you’re traveling through space, remember to never put your money in a Ferengi bank. Seriously, these guys are known for being greedy and you won’t get your money back.

64. Fans of Star Trek: Voyager are bound to enjoy this mutated Tom Paris action figure.

From The Robot's Voice: "Remember how Star Trek: Voyager‘s “Threshold” was recently voted by Topless Robot readers to be the stupidest sci-fi TV episode? Well, that televised groin punch also gave us this figure of Tom Paris. It’s unlikely that any Voyager fan was clamoring for a figure of a mutated version of the show’s most milquetoast character dressed in nursing scrubs, but they got it anyway. Devotees of the episode’s bullshit fish creatures will be filled with joy to learn that this toy also came with three of the baffling writer’s constructs as accessories."

From The Robot’s Voice: “Remember how Star Trek: Voyager‘s “Threshold” was recently voted by Topless Robot readers to be the stupidest sci-fi TV episode? Well, that televised groin punch also gave us this figure of Tom Paris. It’s unlikely that any Voyager fan was clamoring for a figure of a mutated version of the show’s most milquetoast character dressed in nursing scrubs, but they got it anyway. Devotees of the episode’s bullshit fish creatures will be filled with joy to learn that this toy also came with three of the baffling writer’s constructs as accessories.”

65. Descend to the planet with this parachuting Spock action figure.

From The Robot's Voice: "For those days when a Vulcan wants to jump from the Enterprise through a planet’s atmosphere, most certainly burning himself to a crisp, assuming the vacuum of space doesn’t make him freeze and implode first. Drugstore toy maker Ahi extended this line of parachuting figures to characters from Planet of the Apes too, which is equally baffling. Although if the PotA apes had parachute technology, they’d be even more deadly, that’s for sure."

From The Robot’s Voice: “For those days when a Vulcan wants to jump from the Enterprise through a planet’s atmosphere, most certainly burning himself to a crisp, assuming the vacuum of space doesn’t make him freeze and implode first. Drugstore toy maker Ahi extended this line of parachuting figures to characters from Planet of the Apes too, which is equally baffling. Although if the PotA apes had parachute technology, they’d be even more deadly, that’s for sure.”

66. Do your own galactic calculations with your very own Trekulator.

From The Robot's Voice: "It?s a calculator with a picture of Captain Kirk on it. Tarting up something that is even mildly educational is unforgivable, and even a face as pretty as Bill Shatner’s can?t take away that pain."

From The Robot’s Voice: “It?s a calculator with a picture of Captain Kirk on it. Tarting up something that is even mildly educational is unforgivable, and even a face as pretty as Bill Shatner’s can?t take away that pain.”

67. Those who remember the first Star Trek movie might not know that it had a putty tie-in.

From The Robot's Voice: "Don’t remember this from the movie? You obviously must have dozed off during the scene where Scotty saved the day by copying this week?s Beetle Bailey."

From The Robot’s Voice: “Don’t remember this from the movie? You obviously must have dozed off during the scene where Scotty saved the day by copying this week?s Beetle Bailey.”

68. From Star Trek: Generations comes your very own Worf action figure.

From The Robot's Voice: "Based on Star Trek: Generations’ holodeck scene in which Worf is promoted to Lieutenant Commander, this figure has everyone’s favorite ornery Klingon dressed up in 19th century nautical attire–which is really stupid since there’s clearly no honor in looking like a jackass."

From The Robot’s Voice: “Based on Star Trek: Generations’ holodeck scene in which Worf is promoted to Lieutenant Commander, this figure has everyone’s favorite ornery Klingon dressed up in 19th century nautical
attire–which is really stupid since there’s clearly no honor in looking like a jackass.”

69. Like Geordi LaForge? Well, enjoy this Cadet LaForge action figure with his very own CD-ROM.

From The Robot's Voice: "Packaged with a CD-ROM–which ran on Windows 95 no less!–Playmates’ Starfleet Academy line of figures included what was intended to be young versions of Picard, Riker, Geordi and Worf. Each varies in degrees of dreadfulness, but La Forge tops all of them. The sick minds of Playmates’ developing staff decided that he would strut around campus in a silver codpiece. It was probably one that he engineered to do all sorts of kinky stuff to that Brahms girl in his Temporal Causality 101 class. Creepy. No wonder dude couldn’t ever get laid."

From The Robot’s Voice: “Packaged with a CD-ROM–which ran on Windows 95 no less!–Playmates’ Starfleet Academy line of figures included what was intended to be young versions of Picard, Riker, Geordi and Worf. Each varies in degrees of dreadfulness, but La Forge tops all of them. The sick minds of Playmates’ developing staff decided that he would strut around campus in a silver codpiece. It was probably one that he engineered to do all sorts of kinky stuff to that Brahms girl in his Temporal Causality 101 class. Creepy. No wonder dude couldn’t ever get laid.”

70. Commemorate your love for Star Trek with this set of collectible spoons.

Each character has his or her own spoon except Chekov and Sulu. For they have to share. I don't have any logical explanation for this either.

Each character has his or her own spoon except Chekov and Sulu. For they have to share. I don’t have any logical explanation for this either.

71. For a space time summer snack, try Star Trek freezecicles you can make yourself.

Because nothing says summer fun like freezing and eating fruity versions of your favorite Star Trek characters. Also, the kids look kind of creepy on the packaging.

Because nothing says summer fun like freezing and eating fruity versions of your favorite Star Trek characters. Also, the kids look kind of creepy on the packaging.

72. Any young Trekkie always has to have a lunch box of talking Worf.

So carrying your lunch in Worf's head that also talks. Now that's disturbing. Wonder what sadistic bastard came up with that idea.

So carrying your lunch in Worf’s head that also talks. Now that’s disturbing. Wonder what sadistic bastard came up with that idea.

73. Engage with this quality Star Trek logo engagement ring.

Guys, just because your girlfriend likes Star Trek doesn't mean she wants to get engaged with a Star Trek ring. Better go with a standard one from a jewelry store.

Guys, just because your girlfriend likes Star Trek doesn’t mean she wants to get engaged with a Star Trek ring. Better go with a standard one from a jewelry store.

74. Chop your vegetables on this Enterprise cutting board.

Use it to make your own galactic salad. A must have for any cook in the ships mess hall.

Use it to make your own galactic salad. A must have for any cook in the ships mess hall.

75. Tell Scotty to beam you up with this USB communicator replica.

Keep in mind the original series was made in the 1960s. Still, even by 21st century standards it looks hopelessly outdated.

Keep in mind the original series was made in the 1960s. Still, even by 21st century standards it looks hopelessly outdated.

76. Test samples on your planet with your very own tricorder play set.

Yes, it kind of looks like something you'd find in a 60s Bond film. But don't give this to a Starfleet security officer. That's for sure.

Yes, it kind of looks like something you’d find in a 60s Bond film. But don’t give this to a Starfleet security officer. That’s for sure.

77. Now you can snuggle with your very own soft poseable Spock.

I don't know about you. But to me, Spock doesn't strike me as a cuddly guy. So this toy doesn't make any logical sense.

I don’t know about you. But to me, Spock doesn’t strike me as a cuddly guy. So this toy doesn’t make any logical sense.

78. Store your alcoholic beverages in your very own Spock wine decanter.

Uh, did these people who made this get the idea that Vulcans don't drink? Because it's pretty apparent in the show.

Uh, did these people who made this get the idea that Vulcans don’t drink? Because it’s pretty apparent in the show.

79. Dine like a Starfleet captain with this TNG dinner set.

I'm sure such a set will never be used except for display in a china closet. Knowing how some nerds tend to be collectors. Still, this is ridiculous.

I’m sure such a set will never be used except for display in a china closet. Knowing how some nerds tend to be collectors. Still, this is ridiculous.

80. An Enterprise coffee table will sure make a fine addition to any living room.

Not sure if it's bought or made by someone with too much time on their hands. Either way, it's sure to become a fine conversation piece.

Not sure if it’s bought or made by someone with too much time on their hands. Either way, it’s sure to become a fine conversation piece.

81. If you like Star Trek, then decorate your windows with some Star Trek instant stained glass.

Now that just makes no logical sense. How is instant stained glass supposed to work? Or are these better known as stickies?

Now that just makes no logical sense. How is instant stained glass supposed to work? Or are these better known as stickies?

82. Andorian fans would surely love to wear their own Andorian hat to keep warm.

From Games Radar: "Set Phasers to fun? Based on Thy’lek Shran from the series Star Trek: Enterprise, this headwear homage will be greeted with nods of recognition by only the most stringent of Trekkies – everyone else will think you’ve just been separated from the world’s weirdest stag do. Hopefully the fleece lining can still keep you warm and cosy when all of your friends refuse to stand anywhere near you.."

From Games Radar: “Based on Thy’lek Shran from the series Star Trek: Enterprise, this headwear homage will be greeted with nods of recognition by only the most stringent of Trekkies – everyone else will think you’ve just been separated from the world’s weirdest stag do. Hopefully the fleece lining can still keep you warm and cosy when all of your friends refuse to stand anywhere near you..”

83. Fans of Captain Picard would surely crave for their own Picard quote bottle necklace.

From Games Radar: "Wearing a bottle containing a hand-sculpted Starfleet logo and sparkly star confetti might seem like a particularly special type of futility, but the only way to make it worse? Add an obscure Picard quote that is actually incorrect. Here you get the words “What we leave behind is as important as how we've lived" but Jean-Luc’s actual words (spoken in Star Trek Generations) are “What we leave behind is NOT as important as how we've lived" thus the point of his bald-headed wisdom has been squarely missed. Either way, you should definitely just leave this behind."

From Games Radar: “Wearing a bottle containing a hand-sculpted Starfleet logo and sparkly star confetti might seem like a particularly special type of futility, but the only way to make it worse? Add an obscure Picard quote that is actually incorrect. Here you get the words “What we leave behind is as important as how we’ve lived” but Jean-Luc’s actual words (spoken in Star Trek Generations) are “What we leave behind is NOT as important as how we’ve lived” thus the point of his bald-headed wisdom has been squarely missed. Either way, you should definitely just leave this behind.”

84. This James T. Kirk leadlight style painting will sure go great in any home.

From Games Radar: "Of all the thousands of spectacular Star Trek fan portraits that can be found for sale on the internet, this might be the least flattering and the most hideous. Even the artist himself, in listing the item, admits “this thing creeps me out”. Yes, that’s because it looks like you pieced it together from William Shatner’s actual skin."

From Games Radar: “Of all the thousands of spectacular Star Trek fan portraits that can be found for sale on the internet, this might be the least flattering and the most hideous. Even the artist himself, in listing the item, admits “this thing creeps me out”. Yes, that’s because it looks like you pieced it together from William Shatner’s actual skin.”

85. Now Klingons can enjoy fine quality literature with their own translation of Hamlet.

From Games Radar: "This translation of Shakespeare's most notable play (here given the full title of The Tragedy of Khamlet, Son of the Emperor of Qo'noS) was conceived as an experiment to prove right Klingon Chancellor Gorkon who, in Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country , stated: “You have not experienced Shakespeare until you have read him in the original Klingon”. He was right. This is an experience like no other."

From Games Radar: “This translation of Shakespeare’s most notable play (here given the full title of The Tragedy of Khamlet, Son of the Emperor of Qo’noS) was conceived as an experiment to prove right Klingon Chancellor Gorkon who, in Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country , stated: “You have not experienced Shakespeare until you have read him in the original Klingon”. He was right. This is an experience like no other.”

86. Commemorate “The Trouble with Tribbles” with this commemorative Christmas ornament from Hallmark.

Because nothing says Christmas like being buried up to your chest with adorable puff balls with voracious appetites and a fast rate of reproduction. Still, that was a fantastic episode.

Because nothing says Christmas like being buried up to your chest with adorable puff balls with voracious appetites and a fast rate of reproduction. Still, that was a fantastic episode.

87. Those who enjoy the New Frontier Star Trek books may like their very own Captain Calhoun action figure.

Now I know what you're thinking. Who the hell is Captain Calhoun? Well, don't ask me because I don't have the slightest idea either.

Now I know what you’re thinking. Who the hell is Captain Calhoun? Well, don’t ask me because I don’t have the slightest idea either.

88. Fans of Q are sure to enjoy this Warp Series addition action figure.

Apparently, Q couldn't decide what to wear. So he decided to come as some sort of, I don't know. Anyway, he should just go back and change.

Apparently, Q couldn’t decide what to wear. So he decided to come as some sort of, I don’t know. Anyway, he should just go back and change.

89. This electronic door chime will make you feel you’re on the Enterprise.

From Games Radar: " What's the best function of The Enterprise? Is it its warp speed capabilities? Its transporter room? The replicator that can produce thousands of different dishes on command? No, it's probably the way the doors go swisshh when they open and close. And now you can have that too with this probably-quite-difficult-to-set-up-with-very-little-payoff kit."

From Games Radar: ” What’s the best function of The Enterprise? Is it its warp speed capabilities? Its transporter room? The replicator that can produce thousands of different dishes on command? No, it’s probably the way the doors go swisshh when they open and close. And now you can have that too with this probably-quite-difficult-to-set-up-with-very-little-payoff kit.”

90. Grace your living room with this 4oth anniversary teddy bear Kirk figurine from the Hamilton Collection.

Really a bear Kirk? On one hand, it's cute. On the other hand, it's tacky as hell. But I'm sure the Hamilton Collection tried to sell you this in a Sunday newspaper magazine.

Really a bear Kirk? On one hand, it’s cute. On the other hand, it’s tacky as hell. But I’m sure the Hamilton Collection tried to sell you this in a Sunday newspaper magazine.

91. It’s always happy hour in the universe with these Star Trek bottle openers.

Well, they have 2 of the Enterprise and one of a Klingon ship. Not sure why they don't have one of Deep Space Nine since that's where Quark's bar is.

Well, they have 2 of the Enterprise and one of a Klingon ship. Not sure why they don’t have one of Deep Space Nine since that’s where Quark’s bar is.

92. As far as commemorative spoons go, TNG has their own line as well.

From The Robot's Pajamas: "Ah yes, my fine collection of Next Generation spoons. No, no. We don’t use them for soup. They are to look at. They’re spoons AND photos of the Next Generation crew. A perfect match!" And I bet they're not for eating with either.

From The Robot’s Pajamas: “Ah yes, my fine collection of Next Generation spoons. No, no. We don’t use them for soup. They are to look at. They’re spoons AND photos of the Next Generation crew. A perfect match!” And I bet they’re not for eating with either.

93. TNG collectible action marbles are bound to provide fun for hours for the kids.

From The Robot's Pajamas: "Kids that love Star Trek are very likely to throw down their video game controllers and PC mouse and charge the stores en masse for plastic marbles! Marbles. Kids can’t get enough of them!"

From The Robot’s Pajamas: “Kids that love Star Trek are very likely to throw down their video game controllers and PC mouse and charge the stores en masse for plastic marbles! Marbles. Kids can’t get enough of them!”

94. Fans of Captain Picard will love this commemorative coin of him with its own case.

From The Robot's Pajamas: "Want a Star Trek coin? I don’t know what you’d do with it. It’s just a tiny coin with an image of Picard on it. That would get old fast. Well, at least it only costs $150 new." In other words, it's way overpriced.

From The Robot’s Pajamas: “Want a Star Trek coin? I don’t know what you’d do with it. It’s just a tiny coin with an image of Picard on it. That would get old fast. Well, at least it only costs $150 new.” In other words, it’s way overpriced.

95. Fans of the Next Generation will certainly love a framed portrait of their favorite characters with this frame.

From The Robot's Pajamas: "Above is a series of photos of the TNG cast that look like they belong in a high school yearbook. I’m surprised Worf’s background isn’t a bunch of neon lasers. It’s not the most exciting series of images. And they charged $100 for it. That’s just adding insult to injury."

From The Robot’s Pajamas: “Above is a series of photos of the TNG cast that look like they belong in a high school yearbook. I’m surprised Worf’s background isn’t a bunch of neon lasers. It’s not the most exciting series of images. And they charged $100 for it. That’s just adding insult to injury.”

96. Beam to the shower with this transporter shower curtain and bath rug.

However, if you're wearing a red shirt at the time, there's a chance you aren't coming back. Unless you're Scotty since he's a main cast member.

However, if you’re wearing a red shirt at the time, there’s a chance you aren’t coming back. Unless you’re Scotty since he’s a main cast member.

97. Step right out in style with a pair of your own Star Trek sneakers.

I'm sure many of these would be seen as collectibles to display instead of used for their intended purpose. Then again, I could be wrong.

I’m sure many of these would be seen as collectibles to display instead of used for their intended purpose. Then again, I could be wrong.

98. Come all aboard on your very own Star Trek Astro train.

Seems like some companies will try to pass almost anything as a Star Trek promotion during the 1970s. Because this train doesn't seem to have anything to do with Star Trek.

Seems like some companies will try to pass almost anything as a Star Trek promotion during the 1970s. Because this train doesn’t seem to have anything to do with Star Trek.

99. Those who like Spock might enjoy wearing socks like these.

However, you'd have to be out of your Vulcan mind to wear them in public. Still, I find these highly illogical to tell you the truth.

However, you’d have to be out of your Vulcan mind to wear them in public. Still, I find these highly illogical to tell you the truth.

100. You will always know what time it is with this Star Trek cuckoo clock.

I think whoever came up with this being a good idea is cuckoo. Seriously, why this exists, I can offer no logical explanation.

I think whoever came up with this being a good idea is cuckoo. Seriously, why this exists, I can offer no logical explanation.

Star Trek Costumes Boldly Going Where No Man Has Gone Before

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This is a rather  eventful year for Star Trek since it has two big things going for it. This July marks the release of the new movie Star Trek: Beyond. However, whether Old Spock will make an appearance in the film is a mystery since we recently lost Leonard Nimoy who was mourned by Trekkies everywhere. Nevertheless, as we know, this franchise has produced 6 TV shows and several movies. And it continues to appeal to generations. This September will mark Star Trek’s 50th anniversary.

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Conceived by the late Gene Roddenberry and first aired in 1966, Star Trek has been a franchise focused on space, the final frontier with missions to explore new worlds, to seek out life and new civilizations, and to boldly go where no man has gone before. While the original series only ran on NBC for 3 seasons, it managed to attract an enduring and vocal fanbase that its cultural impact can’t be denied and it’s become a cult phenomenon for decades, especially since it had several movies in the 1970s and 1980s as well as notable spin-off series that were more successful like Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: Voyager, and Star Trek: Enterprise. In recent years, they’ve even made a reboot of some of the original movies but in a different style so they wouldn’t be sued by the Roddenberry family (well, that’s my theory). Not to mention, it’s also notable for Trekkies and Star Trek conventions.

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Since Star Trek is well known for Trekkies to dress up as their favorite characters at these conventions. Of course, you might come across people dressed as Kirk and Spock as well as some Klingons. But you might find some other characters there as well. And as you see, you’ll find many aliens in outlandish costumes from the original series and beyond. So for your reading pleasure, I give you a treasure trove of Star Trek costumes from the final frontier boldly going where no man has gone before.

 

  1. Here we have a lovely Andorian woman from Starfleet.
The Andorians are noted for their blue skin, white hair, and antennae. They also tend to call humans "pink skin."

The Andorians are noted for their blue skin, white hair, and antennae. They also tend to call humans “pink skin.”

2. This little guy is a proud member of Starfleet and the Enterprise.

Well, at least that outfit's from The Next Generation. Because if it was a redshirt from the original series, I'd have a problem. Still, so cute.

Well, at least that outfit’s from The Next Generation. Because if it was a redshirt from the original series, I’d have a problem. Still, so cute.

3. Guess these Starfleet officers are from an alternative timeline.

These are Starfleet Steampunk uniforms. And yes, they look kind of cool if you ask me.

These are Starfleet Steampunk uniforms. And yes, they look kind of cool if you ask me.

4. From TNG, may I introduce to you to the lovable android and Operations Officer Data.

Sure Data might be an android who admires humanity. But he's such a loveable guy that you can't help but like him. This one's not bad looking, too.

Sure Data might be an android who admires humanity. But he’s such a lovable guy that you can’t help but like him. This one’s not bad looking, too.

5. Hop aboard the Starfleet Express.

Once again, I give you more Star Trek Steampunk. The guy resembles a train conductor. Like the woman's dress, too.

Once again, I give you more Star Trek Steampunk. The guy resembles a train conductor. Like the woman’s dress, too.

6. Those who remember “Amok Time” might also recall T’Pring.

T'Pring was Spock's fiancee since childhood who dumped him for another Vulcan man. But not before she had Spock fight with Kirk. This, when Spock was going through his pon farr, which isn't pretty.

T’Pring was Spock’s fiancee since childhood who dumped him for another Vulcan man. But not before she had Spock fight with Kirk. This, when Spock was going through his pon farr, which isn’t pretty.

7. Where would Deep Space Nine be without its chief science officer Jadzia Dax?

While she seems like a young woman, she's in symbiosis with a wise, long-lived creature called a Dax. Even before she became a host, she was pretty smart.

While she seems like a young woman, she’s in symbiosis with a wise, long-lived creature called a Dax. Even before she became a host, she was pretty smart.

8. Oh, shit, seems like Kim Cardassian has to be everywhere these days.

I'm not sure if I'd want Kanye West to be with this woman. I hear the Cardassians are known for their brutality. But I think this is hilarious.

I’m not sure if I’d want Kanye West to be with this woman. I hear the Cardassians are known for their brutality. But I think this is hilarious.

9. Against a Borg cube resistance is futile.

The Borg Cube is a spacecraft that's home to the hive like Borg Collective. If your ship comes across one of these, avoid it at all times.

The Borg Cube is a spacecraft that’s home to the hive like Borg Collective. If your ship comes across one of these, avoid it at all times.

10. We should remember that even Klingons were young once.

Sure this baby may look adorable now. But once they grow up, they can be quite ruthless. But they do exhibit a code of honor.

Sure this baby may look adorable now. But once they grow up, they can be quite ruthless. But they do exhibit a code of honor.

11. During the Next Generation, no one can run a better Enterprise than Captain Jean-Luc Picard.

Along with Kirk, Picard is seen as one of the more iconic Star Trek captains. He may be a consummate Earl Grey drinking gentlemen and diplomat, but he's not a guy you'd want to mess with.

Along with Kirk, Picard is seen as one of the more iconic Star Trek captains. He may be a consummate Earl Grey drinking gentlemen and diplomat, but he’s not a guy you’d want to mess with.

12. As TNG’s chief engineer on the Enterprise, you just have to give a hand to Lieutenant Commander Geordi LaForge.

Notably played by LeVar Burton, LaForge has his own visor due to being born blind. Is an engineering whiz, nice guy, and Data's best friend.

Notably played by LeVar Burton, LaForge has his own visor due to being born blind. Is an engineering whiz, nice guy, and Data’s best friend.

13. I bet these two are just like Romeo and Juliet.

Meaning that these two fell in love despite that their planet is engulfed in a stupid civil war. From "Let That Be Your Last Battlefield."

Meaning that these two fell in love despite that their planet is engulfed in a stupid civil war. From “Let That Be Your Last Battlefield.”

14. When it comes to glitz, Ferengi know how to dress.

I think this might be from a Star Trek convention in Las Vegas. It's a place I think Ferengi will feel right at home since they love money.

I think this might be from a Star Trek convention in Las Vegas. It’s a place I think Ferengi will feel right at home since they love money.

15. We should remember that while Romulans may look like Vulcans, they are not.

While Vulcans are seen as logical, Romulans are cunning, passionate, and opportunistic. They're also really hated by Klingons.

While Vulcans are seen as logical, Romulans are cunning, passionate, and opportunistic. They’re also really hated by Klingons.

16. While Klingons are known to be a proud warrior race, there’s always an occasional non-conformist among them.

On your left, you have a rather normal looking Klingon. On your right, you have a Klingon dressed like Elton John in the 1970s.

On your left, you have a rather normal looking Klingon. On your right, you have a Klingon dressed like Elton John in the 1970s.

17. In a parallel universe, Spock is known to sport a trademark goatee.

Yes, that's Evil Spock all right. He's very scary and also not to be messed with. Not sure who the woman's supposed to be.

Yes, that’s Evil Spock all right. He’s very scary and also not to be messed with. Not sure who the woman’s supposed to be.

18. Of course, even Bones McCoy is bound to get some action in “Shore Leave.”

Yes, I know that's Dr. McCoy with two women who are dressed like they're from a Dr. Seuss porn parody. But yes, this was in the original series. Don't ask me how wardrobe came up with those outfits.

Yes, I know that’s Dr. McCoy with two women who are dressed like they’re from a Dr. Seuss porn parody. But yes, this was in the original series. Don’t ask me how wardrobe came up with those outfits.

19. On Vulcan, Spock’s family matriarch is T’Pau.

She was to officiate on what should've been Spock's wedding. But his fiancee had other ideas.

She was to officiate on what should’ve been Spock’s wedding. But his fiancee had other ideas.

20. From “The Way to Eden” is Irina Galliulin a Starfleet dropout and onetime girlfriend of Ensign Chekov.

And as space hippie, her costume was possibly made from curtains. Still, "Eden" in this episode is basically uninhabitable.

And as space hippie, her costume was possibly made from curtains. Still, “Eden” in this episode is basically uninhabitable.

21. This green girl apparently has a gig as a Las Vegas showgirl.

Okay, that's really clever. I know Kirk might want a piece of her. Like the feathers though.

Okay, that’s really clever. I know Kirk might want a piece of her. Like the feathers though.

22. On the Enterprise, you might find space suits like these from the original series.

Interestingly enough, I'm sure this guy's suit was made by the same materials as the original ones were. Seems like an almost perfect replica, too. Screen windows, especially.

Interestingly enough, I’m sure this guy’s suit was made by the same materials as the original ones were. Seems like an almost perfect replica, too. Screen windows, especially.

23. This orange space suit is said to have a certain hazmat variant.

Well, it's not exactly like the original but close. Still has the haz mat design in mind.

Well, it’s not exactly like the original but close. Still has the hazmat design in mind.

24. Aboard the first Enterprise as resident Vulcan and science officer was none other than T’Pol.

And this is her in her trademark outfit. Still has sexual tension with Archer and Tucker.

And this is her in her trademark outfit. Still has sexual tension with Archer and Tucker.

25. Staffing on Deep Space Nine as Chief of Security and First Officer are Odo and Major Kira.

As a shapeshifter, Odo is well suited for the job but doesn't know where he comes from. Major Kira is a Bajoran who wants independence for her people.

As a shapeshifter, Odo is well suited for the job but doesn’t know where he comes from. Major Kira is a Bajoran who wants independence for her people.

26. As far as sexy get ups go, Losira’s is interesting.

I know it looks like a mix of harem attire and TRON. But I have no idea what Star Trek's costume designer was on during the 1960s.

I know it looks like a mix of harem attire and TRON. But I have no idea what Star Trek’s costume designer was on during the 1960s.

27. Those who’ve watched the original series might remember Harry Mudd and his women.

Well, here he is with one of his women. Still, the guy is a con man you shouldn't trust with anything, especially if it pertains to money. Also, his beautiful women, they're on drugs to appear super beautiful.

Well, here he is with one of his women. Still, the guy is a con man you shouldn’t trust with anything, especially if it pertains to money. Also, his beautiful women, they’re on drugs to appear super beautiful.

28. Member of Starfleet or 19th century Trekkie?

And yet, another Steampunk Starfleet uniform. Still, like the sword. Couldn't resist this one.

And yet, another Steampunk Starfleet uniform. Still, like the sword. Couldn’t resist this one.

29. I bring you the command of the Enterprise you all know and love.

I guess these consist of Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Uhura, and Scotty. And it seems Uhura is holding a tribble.

I guess these consist of Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Uhura, and Scotty. And it seems Uhura is holding a tribble.

30. Looks like Captain Kirk likes to have a bunny or two on bridge.

We all know that Kirk has a well established reputation as a perv. This is why casting him as Hugh Hefner with Starfleet Playboy bunnies is so funny. And one is even green.

We all know that Kirk has a well established reputation as a perv. This is why casting him as Hugh Hefner with Starfleet Playboy bunnies is so funny. And one is even green.

31. Even Princess Leia can’t help herself to the occasional tribble.

Yes, this is a Star Wars and Star Trek mashup. And yes, Chewie's depicted as a tribble. But it's clever.

Yes, this is a Star Wars and Star Trek mashup. And yes, Chewie’s depicted as a tribble. But it’s clever.

32. Occasionally, you might have a chance to see T’Pol in pink.

Yes, she wore an outfit like that, too. But not as often. But that expression is rather typical of her character, especially when Commander Tucker got himself in a little escapade.

Yes, she wore an outfit like that, too. But not as often. But that expression is rather typical of her character, especially when Commander Tucker got himself into a little escapade.

33. Second to Picard on the Enterprise is Commander Riker.

Seems to resemble the guy from the show. However, he's not nearly as likable as Picard at any rate.

Seems to resemble the guy from the show. However, he’s not nearly as likable as Picard at any rate.

34. I’m afraid this Starfleet crew member has already been assimilated.

The Borg are a nasty bunch in Star Trek since they turn people into mindless cyborgs. They make Cardassians, Klingons, and Romulans seem friendly.

The Borg are a nasty bunch in Star Trek since they turn people into mindless cyborgs. They make Cardassians, Klingons, and Romulans seem friendly.

35. These Andorian women are just hanging out.

I guess those are what the Andorians normally wear. Seems to go well with their complexions.

I guess those are what the Andorians normally wear. Seems to go well with their complexions.

36. Guess Klingon Gandalf decided to make an appearance.

So let me get this straight. He's a Klingon. Yet, he's also a wizard. Let's just say you shall not pass by him on any day.

So let me get this straight. He’s a Klingon. Yet, he’s also a wizard. Let’s just say you shall not pass by him on any day.

37. Fresh from Starfleet Academy, here are some new Guardians of the Galaxy.

And I see that Groot has a red shirt on. Let's hope it doesn't mean anything bad. Then again, he does regenerate somehow.

And I see that Groot has a red shirt on. Let’s hope it doesn’t mean anything bad. Then again, he does regenerate somehow.

38. Here we have Captain Jean-Luc Picard meeting up with Commander Benjamin Sisko.

Of course, while under Borg assimilation, Picard killed Sisko's wife Jennifer. Because of this Sisko doesn't really like him much.

Of course, while under Borg assimilation, Picard killed Sisko’s wife Jennifer. Because of this Sisko doesn’t really like him much.

39. With Spock, it’s always “Live long and prosper.”

Yes, that's Spock all right. He's one of the most popular characters in the franchise. Leonard Nimoy will sure be missed.

Yes, that’s Spock all right. He’s one of the most popular characters in the franchise. Leonard Nimoy will sure be missed.

40. Here we have Data sharing a moment with his beloved cat.

His cat's name is Spot and is in TNG for the last 4 seasons. It's also a female and has kittens.

His cat’s name is Spot and is in TNG for the last 4 seasons. It’s also a female and has kittens.

41. On board the Enterprise TNG, we have Counselor Deanna Troi.

She's half-Betazoid with empathetic abilities as well as detect lies and helps give Picard the edge in negotiations (by usually stating the obvious). Usually functions on the show as the damsel in distress and therapist.

She’s half-Betazoid with empathetic abilities as well as detect lies and helps give Picard the edge in negotiations (by usually stating the obvious). Usually functions on the show as the damsel in distress and therapist.

42. Of course, Troi also wears a blue dress as well.

Well, that blue dress is lovely. However, as far as the TNG cast is concerned, she's not among the most liked.

Well, that blue dress is lovely. However, as far as the TNG cast is concerned, she’s not among the most liked.

43. Joining the Voyager crew is the Doctor and Seven of Nine.

He is a mere hologram physician. And she is a highly attractive woman who's recovering from Borg assimilation. These two are probably the best liked characters of the Voyager series.

He is a mere hologram physician. And she is a highly attractive woman who’s recovering from Borg assimilation. These two are probably the best liked characters of the Voyager series.

44. And here Kim Cardassian looks stunning in her Vogue formal gown.

This is brilliant and hilarious. Love how Kim K's depicted as a reptilian alien who tend to be enemies of the Federation.

This is brilliant and hilarious. Love how Kim K’s depicted as a reptilian alien who tend to be enemies of the Federation.

45. In the new movies, you tend to see Spock paired with Uhura.

As far as putting Uhura with Spock, this Trekkie is not a fan. I mean such romance doesn't really make sense to me. What the hell were the screenwriters thinking?

As far as putting Uhura with Spock, this Trekkie is not a fan. I mean such romance doesn’t really make sense to me. What the hell were the screenwriters thinking?

46. Here Captain Kirk tells a female redshirt to set her phaser to “stunning.”

Female Redshirts: To some they are eye candy. To some they are candy. Still have a higher survivor rate than their male counterparts.

Female Redshirts: To some they are eye candy. To some they are candy. Still have a higher survivor rate than their male counterparts.

47. Deep Space Nine serves as the exploration base of the Gamma Quadrant.

Well, I guess Deep Space Nine makes an easier costume than the Enterprise. Love the light effects though.

Well, I guess Deep Space Nine makes an easier costume than the Enterprise. Love the light effects though.

48. Guess these two people are from Scotty’s family.

After all, they're both wearing kilts. Then again, you never saw Scotty wearing one but that's probably for the best.

After all, they’re both wearing kilts. Then again, you never saw Scotty wearing one but that’s probably for the best.

49. Here we have Captain Picard on bridge fighting the Teddy Borg.

I have to admit, this adorable. However, this little squirt will probably end up getting assimilated though.

I have to admit, this adorable. However, this little squirt will probably end up getting assimilated though.

50. Tending the bar on Enterprise is Guinan.

She's played by Whoopi Goldberg in TNG. Still, she's said to be the person whom Q most fears. Also, she's of much better use than Troi.

She’s played by Whoopi Goldberg in TNG. Still, she’s said to be the person whom Q most fears. Also, she’s of much better use than Troi.

51. Seems like Captain Kirk can’t get enough of those green girls.

Well, given Kirk's reputation, this should be expected. His green girl fetish is a running gag in the new Star Trek movies, which I think is appropriate.

Well, given Kirk’s reputation, this should be expected. His green girl fetish is a running gag in the new Star Trek movies, which I think is appropriate.

52. Guess Lieutenant Uhura has a call from bridge to answer at this time.

Well, she's a communications officer so what do you expect. Still, she does get to land on a few planets, however.

Well, she’s a communications officer so what do you expect. Still, she does get to land on a few planets, however.

53. Didn’t know Deep Space Nine had its own baseball team.

At first I didn't know what to think of this until I realized the "Niniers" reference was to Deep Space Nine. Also, giving Sisko's love of baseball, this is appropriate.

At first I didn’t know what to think of this until I realized the “Niniers” reference was to Deep Space Nine. Also, giving Sisko’s love of baseball, this is appropriate.

54. On Star Trek: Voyager, Seven of Nine is easily the most remembered.

Then again, she's probably the main reason why most people remember the show at all. Not to mention, she tends to be very popular among teenage boys as well as 18-35 year olds.

Then again, she’s probably the main reason why most people remember the show at all. Not to mention, she tends to be very popular among teenage boys as well as 18-35 year olds.

55. Of course, sometimes Kirk’s presence can be made known for months at at time.

Yep, Kirk was here all right. And it seems like he wasn't using protection at the time. Kirk probably has kids all over the galaxy.

Yep, Kirk was here all right. And it seems like he wasn’t using protection at the time. Kirk probably has kids all over the galaxy.

56. That man is undead, Jim.

He says so himself. Most likely died when Kirk and some officers visited a planet. Not sure how he became a zombie.

He says so himself. Most likely died when Kirk and some officers visited a planet. Not sure how he became a zombie.

57. As Bones, Dr. McCoy is the Enterprise’s Chief Medical Officer.

He also knows when a man is dead, Jim. Also, don't make him do stuff beyond his job because he's a doctor not a________.

He also knows when a man is dead, Jim. Also, don’t make him do stuff beyond his job because he’s a doctor not a________.

58. Looks like Captain Kirk is having some trouble with tribbles.

By the way, "Trouble with Tribbles" one of the best Star Trek episodes ever. It's also hilarious. Remember tribbles make terrible pets.

By the way, “Trouble with Tribbles” one of the best Star Trek episodes ever. It’s also hilarious. Remember tribbles make terrible pets.

59. These Klingons decided to show up in their casual wear.

However, the man's clothing does have the Klingon logo on them. Still, for Klingons, these two seem so friendly.

However, the man’s clothing does have the Klingon logo on them. Still, for Klingons, these two seem so friendly.

60. Guess these Klingons have a sensitive side after all.

Nevertheless, they're dressed up as Imperial Stormtroopers in tutus and tiaras. Hilarious.

Nevertheless, they’re dressed up as Imperial Stormtroopers in tutus and tiaras. Hilarious.

61. This Seven of Nine looks absolutely stunning.

Not bad looking for someone who's been assimilated by the Borg and survived. Then again, she was probably Voyager's resident fanservice personnel.

Not bad looking for someone who’s been assimilated by the Borg and survived. Then again, she was probably Voyager’s resident fanservice personnel.

62. This little Spock seems like a logical tyke.

Now this is so adorable. Love the little pointy ears. Still, remember that he's half-human though.

Now this is so adorable. Love the little pointy ears. Still, remember that he’s half-human though.

63. Oh, look, here comes the Redshirt brigade.

Whenever one of these beams down to the planet, chances are they're never coming back. Well, at least for the men. Not sure about the women.

Whenever one of these beams down to the planet, chances are they’re never coming back. Well, at least for the men. Not sure about the women.

64. As far as Star Trek villains go, none is more menacing than the dreaded Khan.

Had to include this since Wrath of Khan is one of the best known Star Trek movies ever. Was famously played by Ricardo Montalban.

Had to include this since Wrath of Khan is one of the best known Star Trek movies ever. Was famously played by Ricardo Montalban.

65. Guess Gorn decided to dress for the occasion this time.

Unfortunately, for us, you won't be seeing him fighting Kirk any time soon. Still, Kirk's fight with Gorn is pretty funny.

Unfortunately, for us, you won’t be seeing him fighting Kirk any time soon. Still, Kirk’s fight with Gorn is pretty funny.

66. You might not know her, but at one time Yeoman Janice Rand was seen as Kirk’s main squeeze.

Here she is with a tribble and a basket weave (on her head). And yes, her hair was like that in the original series, too.

Here she is with a tribble and a basket weave (on her head). And yes, her hair was like that in the original series, too.

67. As chief engineer of the Enterprise, there was never a problem Montgomery Scott couldn’t fix.

However, the phrase "Beam me up, Scotty," was never uttered on the show. Still, he's one of the few redshirts on the series to survive planet landings and live to tell the tale.

However, the phrase “Beam me up, Scotty,” was never uttered on the show. Still, he’s one of the few redshirts on the series to survive planet landings and live to tell the tale.

68. On TNG, Q is an entity of mystery and a formidable foe.

Q is part of a race of godlike aliens who live outside a plane of existence. However, though he plays pranks, he's not a malicious character. In later shows, he's more of a teacher.

Q is part of a race of godlike aliens who live outside a plane of existence. However, though he plays pranks, he’s not a malicious character. In later shows, he’s more of a teacher.

69. So I guess this redshirt isn’t really dead after all.

He's just been seriously injured by aliens and has been treated in sick bay. So it's no fuss.

He’s just been seriously injured by aliens and has been treated in sick bay. So it’s no fuss.

70. Seems like Worf really tries to set a good example to children.

Actually I think this is a dad with his kids. But Worf is a very popular character in Star Trek since he's a Klingon and a badass.

Actually I think this is a dad with his kids. But Worf is a very popular character in Star Trek since he’s a Klingon and a badass.

71. Sure Klingons kill but they won’t eat you.

Seems like this Klingon has a sense of humor. Nevertheless, Klingon warriors can be quite aggressive and ruthless.

Seems like this Klingon has a sense of humor. Nevertheless, Klingon warriors can be quite aggressive and ruthless.

72. Speaking of Klingons, here’s a Klingon Hello Kitty.

I know it's kind of a weird mashup since Hello Kitty doesn't seem to live to Klingon warrior preferences. Still, this is funny.

I know it’s kind of a weird mashup since Hello Kitty doesn’t seem to live to Klingon warrior preferences. Still, this is funny.

73. Where would a Klingon warrior ever be without his signature weapon?

Not sure what this weapon is called. But it sure looks quite badass. Now I see why Klingons are popular among Star Trek fans.

Not sure what this weapon is called. But it sure looks quite badass. Now I see why Klingons are popular among Star Trek fans.

74. For fans of the original series, who could forget Kirk’s fight with Gorn?

Now the Gorn and Kirk episode might've been poignant for the time. But now it hasn't aged very well.

Now the Gorn and Kirk episode might’ve been poignant for the time. But it hasn’t aged very well within the last decades.

75. Guess Evil Spock is sharing a dance with Evil Uhura.

Okay, I might see this pairing. Still, while I'm fine with Uhura and Spock, I am not okay with them getting together in the reboot movies. Because I just don't see them getting together.

Okay, I might see this pairing. Still, while I’m fine with Uhura and Spock, I am not okay with them getting together in the reboot movies. Because I just don’t see them getting together.

76. You know that dog with the horn from the original series? Well, there’s a costume for that.

Man, that looks so freakish it's unreal. Still, that original series didn't seem to have much of a budget on visual effects.

Man, that looks so freakish it’s unreal. Still, that original series didn’t seem to have much of a budget on visual effects as far as I’m concerned.

77. Borg assimilation: fun for the whole family.

Yes, this is a Borg family. Even the baby's teddy wasn't immune. Resistance is futile.

Yes, this is a Borg family. Even the baby’s teddy wasn’t immune. Resistance is futile.

78. Apparently, Klingons know how to dress for a wedding.

However, would you want to attend a Klingon wedding on Star Trek? No. Seriously, I don't want to know what a Klingon wedding is like.

However, would you want to attend a Klingon wedding on Star Trek? No. Seriously, I don’t want to know what a Klingon wedding is like.

79. Now won’t you take a look at this San Francisco Worf.

Still, I don't think I'd call Worf a hippie beyond any stretch. But I think this is quite funny.

Still, I don’t think I’d call Worf a hippie beyond any stretch. But I think this is quite funny.

80. When these Redshirts are hit, they just keep going.

However, on the original series, redshirts don't survive wounds like these on the planets. In fact, they usually don't come back.

However, on the original series, redshirts don’t survive wounds like these on the planets. In fact, they usually don’t come back.

81. I’m afraid she’s dead, Jim.

Here we see a redshirt doing what redshirts do best: dying on the planet. That's what they mostly do.

Here we see a redshirt doing what redshirts do best: dying on the planet. That’s what they mostly do.

82. For little ones, these little Starfleet costumes would do nicely.

Let's see, there's Kirk, Spock, and I hope the kid in red is Scotty. If not, then I think he's doomed.

Let’s see, there’s Kirk, Spock, and I hope the kid in red is Scotty. If not, then I think he’s doomed. Still, these are so cute.

83. Of course, as we all know about Ferengi women, clothes are seen as obscene.

Nevertheless, on Earth, their naughty bits had to be censored. Still, this is funny.

Nevertheless, on Earth, their naughty bits had to be censored. Still, this is funny.

84. Seems like we have a new bombshell on deck.

And I'm sure Kirk is going to have his way with the new science officer by the end of this episode. Still, that's a pretty good costume.

And I’m sure Kirk is going to have his way with the new science officer by the end of this episode. Still, that’s a pretty good costume.

85. Here I introduce to you Data with the Borg Queen.

Heard they got together in the movies, don't ask. Still, the Borg Queen is a very insidious villain in the franchise.

Heard they got together in the movies, don’t ask. Still, the Borg Queen is a very insidious villain in the franchise.

86. Heard of Sherlock Holmes and Watson? How about Data and LaForge?

I think they did have a Sherlock Holmes episode. However, I'm sure they're sleuthing skills are very astute at least in the engineering room.

I think they did have a Sherlock Holmes episode. However, I’m sure they’re sleuthing skills are very astute at least in the engineering room.

87. Kirk and Spock are such best buds that you can see them on a bicycle built for two.

And apparently, it's fire powered. Still, you have to love this or at least think it's clever.

And apparently, it’s fire powered. Still, you have to love this or at least think it’s clever.

88. Let me guess, that’s Chakotay from Voyager.

Because the guy is best known for being No. 2 Janeway, having a tattoo on his face, and ending up with Seven of Nine. That's all you need to know about him.

Because the guy is best known for being No. 2 Janeway, having a tattoo on his face to show his Native American heritage, and ending up with Seven of Nine. That’s all you need to know about him.

89. Looks like the sun god Apollo decided to pay a visit.

He may be a Greek god but he was featured in a Star Trek episode. Also kind of a jerk by the way, not unlike his mythological counterpart.

He may be a Greek god but he was featured in a Star Trek episode. Also kind of a jerk by the way, not unlike his mythological counterpart.

90. Looks like tribbles seem to get along with Romulans quite nicely.

However, according to "Trouble with Tribbles," tribbles don't like Klingons at all. This is why the tribbles were sent aboard a Klingon ship in the end.

However, according to “Trouble with Tribbles,” tribbles don’t like Klingons at all. This is why the tribbles were sent aboard a Klingon ship in the end.

91. This Spock tyke knows his Vulcan signs.

Being half-human, you'd have to expect Spock being bullied while he was a child. Still, this is adorable.

Being half-human, you’d have to expect Spock being bullied while he was a child. Still, this is adorable.

92. In original series, some alien costumes tend to be rather outlandish.

I don't know what this alien is supposed to be but she's kind of a cross between a supermodel and an Ooomah Loompah. She also appears scantily clad in tin foil.

I don’t know what this alien is supposed to be but she’s kind of a cross between a supermodel and an Ooomah Loompah. She also appears scantily clad in tin foil.

93. Whenever there’s a problem, this cat LaForge could always fix it.

Yes, it's a cat dressed as La Forge as you can see. I'm sure some people might find this incredibly cute.

Yes, it’s a cat dressed as La Forge as you can see. I’m sure some people might find this incredibly cute.

94. In a parallel universe, you have Captain Kirk with his Marlena.

In the normal Star Trek universe, Marlena only lasted an episode. But so do most of Kirk's girlfriends.

In the normal Star Trek universe, Marlena only lasted an episode. But so do most of Kirk’s girlfriends.

95. While Klingon men are fearsome warriors, you can’t underestimate Klingon women either.

Because they can be very aggressive and are also expected to be warriors. So don't try to mess with them.

Because they can be very aggressive and are also expected to be warriors. So don’t try to mess with them.

96. On TNG, where would Riker be without Counselor Troi?

I don't have the slightest idea. However, TNG would've probably been a better show without either of them.

I don’t have the slightest idea. However, TNG would’ve probably been a better show without either of them.

97. Seems like this Vulcan girl of Starfleet has a lovely dress and jacket to match.

Sure she's supposed to be a female Spock. But I think this is a lovely dress. I kind of wish the women on the original series would wear something more like it.

Sure she’s supposed to be a female Spock. But I think this is a lovely dress. I kind of wish the women on the original series would wear something more like it.

98. Seems like joining Starfleet is a tradition for this family.

 Then again, in later Star Trek shows, people do have their families on board with them. Still, this is adorable.

Then again, in later Star Trek shows, people do have their families on board with them. Still, this is adorable.

99. Guess this Starfleet officer will suffer a fate worse than death.

He's probably going to be assimilated some time soon. And I'm sure any resistance he tries to put up will be futile.

He’s probably going to be assimilated some time soon. And I’m sure any resistance he tries to put up will be futile.

100. Guess these green women are part of the Starfleet entertainment company.

Still, if they were in the original series, I'm sure Kirk will try to hook up with one of them. Nevertheless, I think their costumes are quite creative.

Still, if they were in the original series, I’m sure Kirk will try to hook up with one of them. Nevertheless, I think their costumes are quite creative.