Strange Easter Traditions Around the World

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 16, 2015

As with Christmas, Easter is celebrated around the world as well since it’s also a religious holiday. So while some countries celebrate Easter, others may not even among Christians who might consider it too pagan like the Quakers, Puritans, and Jehovah Witnesses. Now also like Christmas, no two countries celebrate Easter the same way possibly due to seasonal patterns, old traditions, and other factors. And sometimes with American eyes, many of these traditions may seem strange. Not to mention, Easter didn’t really become a mainstream secular holiday until recently but students don’t get as many days off. Nevertheless, here are some of the strange Easter traditions you may see from around the world.

1. Czech Republic and Slovakia

Women living in some parts of Eastern Europe should expect to get their asses whipped by the fellas this Easter since it’s said that such actions make them healthy and beautiful. Yeah, I know what outsiders are thinking.

If you’re a woman living in either of these countries, expect to be chased around by men hitting with handmade whips this Easter Monday. Of course, those who aren’t into BDSM shouldn’t be disappointed because they’re not intended to be painful. It’s also believed that whipping women on Easter is supposed to make them more healthy and beautiful.

2. Finland

Those visiting the Nordic countries might wonder whether the Scandinavians, Icelanders, and Finns have gotten their Easter mixed up with Halloween since they have bonfires as well as kids dressed as witches going door to door for candy. But no, it’s just their tradition.

It’s a popular superstition in Finland that all Finnish witches fly down to Germany to party with the devil on Easter. This has given rise to the tradition of children dressing up as witches with broomsticks hanging around their necks and wander around door to door to ask for treats. They also lit bonfires to keep satanic forces away that supposedly roam around this day. So Easter in Finland is kind of like Halloween. In Sweden, little girls take part in this tradition on April 30th known as Walburgis night as well as in Denmark where the children give out willow branches in exchange for candy. Another Easter tradition in Finland is watching grass grow to signify the start of spring. Once mature, children would decorate it with painted eggs and paper bunnies.

3. Russia

While the US and Germany have chocolate bunnies, those in Russia have the the Easter lamb made from butter since it’s believe Satan can’t transform as one. But eating a butter lamb can leave to high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease.

Instead of chocolate bunnies, Russians usually dig into a large piece of butter that’s in the shape of a lamb. This tradition is based on the religious idea that lambs are lucky since they’re the only animals whose form Satan couldn’t take.

4. Papua New Guinea

In this tropical country, you will find trees outside churches decorated with sticks of tobacco and cigarettes in the days leading to Easter. After the Easter Sunday church services, smokes are handed out and everyone lights up.

5. France

Every Easter in Haux, the villagers gather all their eggs to put in a large frying pan in the square. The result is perhaps the world’s largest omelet.

On Easter Monday, people in the town of Haux gather together taking all the eggs from their houses and bringing them to the town square. There, they put their eggs in a massive pan used to cook a giant omelet that could feed 1,000 people and contains over 4,500 eggs.

6. New Zealand

While the US has a furry, cute Easter Bunny bringing children eggs, in New Zealand it’s rabbit season with the Great Bunny Hunt. Some 20,000 bunnies are killed a year in New Zealand on Easter. They probably should just stick to Orcs.

While the US has the cute, furry, Easter Bunny, if there’s a place Peter Cottontail should avoid this Easter, New Zealand would be it. And it’s not because of Orcs. Because on Easter, New Zealanders go out to hunt rabbits with a prize of $NZ 3,500 to who kills the most bunnies. Every year as many 20,000 rabbits are killed in this country.

7. Poland

One Easter Sunday, men aren’t allowed to cook or even stand in the kitchen or else his mustache will go gray and the Easter bread dough will fail to rise. They also believe that swallowing a willow catkin from a branch consecrated by a priest would bring health.

As for processions on Good Friday, Polish miners don ceremonial uniforms and at the Wieliczka Salt Mine where they perform the Underground Way of the Holy Cross. They march to an underground salt monument of Pope John Paul II in the underground Kinga Chapel, a place he once visited.

8. Hungary

In other parts of Eastern Europe women in traditional garb should expect to be doused by water on their way to their Easter Sunday mass. Priests should expect wet pews in their churches.

On Easter, women dress in traditional garb for Sunday Mass while men jump out and pour buckets of water at them as part of a “purifying ritual.”

9. Australia

Instead of an Easter Bunny, Australia has an Easter Bilby which is a native endangered marsupial that resembles a mouse. Also, they hate rabbits which they consider pests.

While the US has the Easter Bunny, Australia has the Easter Bilby bringing the eggs. One of the reasons behind this change is to create awareness of the bilby which is an endangered species. Also, there’s a strong dislike for bunnies which are considered pests that destroy crops.

10. Colombia

For their Easter dinner, instead of eggs and chocolate, the Colombians dine on iguana, turtles, and big rodents.

11. Germany

Instead of hiding their colored eggs, the Germans hang their decorated eggs out in the open on trees for all to see. Seems like the Germans have to have trees for everything.

While children in other countries look for hidden Easter eggs, the Germans display their Easter eggs are displayed on trees and prominently in the streets. Some will have thousands of multi colored eggs hanged on them. This might be that these symbolize new life and the resurrection. They also burn their Christmas trees on Easter Sunday and eat a lot of green foods and spinach on Holy Thursday.

Germany is also home to the Oberammergau Passion Play in the village that bears its name which is performed every 10 years from May to October starting at 9:30 a.m. and continuing with a 12:15-3:00 p. m. lunch break before finally finishing at 6:00 p.m. However, the villagers do this as a thank you from God for saving them from a plague in 1633 and put a large painting of Jesus to show this. But nearly everyone in the village takes part in the play either as one of the actors or behind the scenes, making clothes and props to run it. Still, this play is very popular all over the world that bookings take place for many years before the play is performed.

12. Greece

While some countries have multi colored eggs, in Greece the eggs are only painted red to represent the blood of Christ and used for making Easter bread as well as banged on their neighbor’s heads.

In the town of Corfu, it’s tradition for the people to throw out their crockery and pots out the window on Easter Saturday. We’re not sure why they do this. Some say it’s to symbolize the rejection of Judas. Others think it’s simply the exuberance of having a smashing time after the penitential season of Lent. There are other theories of symbolism such as getting rid of evil or the change of seasons in which the old pots of last year’s harvest are exchanged for new ones. Some think it’s adopted from the old Venetian tradition of throwing out one’s winter things for new ones for spring.

In the Greek village of Vrontados, Easter is celebrated with a fireworks war between the two Greek Orthodox parishes. Parishioners make their own rockets for this. Of course, it attracts thousands of tourists.

In the village of Vrontados on the island of Chios, the two Orthodox churches face off every Easter with parishioners making their own rockets and teenagers leading the war against each other. It’s said to be a century old tradition which apparently started when some Greek villagers tried to scare away the Turkish army using fireworks. Some say that it started when some Greek sailors met Chinese men who taught them how to make fireworks. Anyway thousands of rockets are used and it attracts tourists every year on Easter, boosting the town’s economy.

13. Ethiopia

On the Easter festival, the people of Ethiopia celebrate a noble feast featuring a large loaf of sourdough bread called, “Dabo.” During the day, visitors are greeted with a slice of “Dabo” to honor the crucifixion of Christ. They also wear white to exemplify purity and display headbands from palm leaves which symbolize the palm leaves Jesus’s followers greeted him with during his passage into Jerusalem before his crucifixion.

14. Switzerland

For Easter, the Swiss have an age old tradition of decorating the fountains with spring flowers and colored eggs, which creates a rather stunning sight.

The Frankonian Swiss have an old Easter tradition of decorating wells with painted eggs and spring flowers to celebrate the gift of life.

Switzerland is not a fan of the Easter Bunny so the Easter Cuckoo is credited with bringing children eggs instead. Yet, they still sell chocolate bunnies though.

15. Great Britain

In the town of Bacup in Northern England, Easter Saturday is celebrated with the Nutter’s Dance which has been performed since the 18th century. It’s said to originate with Moorish sailors who somehow ended up in the area but why it’s performed on Easter Saturday, there’s no explanation. It’s a strange dance led by a Whiffer (or Whipper In), who cracks a whip to drive away evil spirits represented by a group of men with blackened faces in red, black, and white costumes and neck garlands.

The English village of Hallaton in Lancashire where the villagers play a game called bottle kicking which is a no rules rugby game played with barrels. Ambulances stand by for this due to obvious reasons.

The village of Hallaton in Leicestershire celebrates Easter with a game of bottle kicking which is essentially a no rules rugby game played with 3 beer barrels and a pitch spread over a mile of cross country land. Ambulances are on standby every year there.

On Holy Thursday, it was once used as the day when the monarchs showed their humility and washed the poor’s feet. It was symbolic of Jesus washing the feet of his disciples, though only a select few poor got their feet washed. However, this was later changed with the ascension of the Protestant William and Mary in 1689. Nowadays the Queen just gives out money, usually the same amount as her age.

During the Easter season, the English village of Hungerford has what’s known as the Hockside festival. This begins each year when the new police constable blows his horn calling all men to the Hockside court. Two men are selected and they parade through the streets giving women oranges in exchange for kisses.

Another English Easter tradition is Morris dancing which involves guys dancing in ribbons, clogs, and sometimes funny hats. According to Blackadder, it’s a very lame dance and one he doesn’t like.

Britain also celebrates Easter with an Easter egg roll in which people try to roll colored hardboiled eggs on a hill. While this has taken hold in countries like the US, the Brits tend to be pretty competitive about it. Other strange Easter customs include Pace Egg plays mostly depicting Saint George and the dragon as well as Morris dancing which is an English folk dance said to originate through druidic rites but is better known to Americans as being mercilessly ripped on the first season of Blackadder. Let’s just say the Great Britain has a lot of strange Easter traditions and leave it at that.

16. Norway

On Easter in Norway, most of the businesses and public services are closed while the day is devoted to crime stories that even the milk cartons have their own mysteries on them.

In Norway, Easter is a 5 day bank holiday in which all the businesses close save the grocery store on the Saturday before. During this time Norwegians celebrate by reading crime novels known as Påskekrimmen as well as watching crime thrillers on TV. There are even mystery stories on milk cartons and magazines. Of course, why Norwegians celebrate Easter with this crime stuff is just one of those mysteries.

17. Netherlands, Belgium, and France

While Americans have the Easter Bunny, France, Belgium, and the Netherlands have the Easter Bells which is said to depart from the churches to Rome on Holy Week only to come back bringing eggs and candies for the kids. Seems like something from a bad acid trip doesn’t it? But I’m not making this up.

In these countries, it’s said that the church bells fly to Rome for a few days on Holy Week and only return on Easter morning bringing back colored eggs and chocolate rabbits. It’s said the tradition started because all church bells are silent as a sign of mourning Jesus for several days before Easter. In the Netherlands and Flemish speaking Belgium, the bells fly away on Holy Saturday. In France and French speaking Belgium on Holy Thursday. Either way, replacing Santa Claus with metal bells seems like a bad acid trip to those who may never heard of it. Seriously, I’m not making this up.

18. Greece, Spain, Portugal, and Mexico as well as Latin America

A big tradition in Catholic and Orthodox countries is Judas burning in which an effigy of Judas is tried, hanged, and burned. While it’s under fire for being anti-Semitic, people also burn effigies of politicians they don’t like as well.

In some communities in these countries, it’s customary to burn an effigy of Judas on Easter, typically depicted as hung by the neck after a fake trial. Sometimes they’d make effigies of unpopular politicians and filling the Judas effigy with fireworks. It was once practiced all over Europe before it went into decline due to it’s possible association with being called, “the burning of the Jew,” especially in Latin America. However, the Orthodox Church has since defended the practice.

19. Philippines

In the Philippines, it’s not unusual pn Holy Week for some devout Catholic men to show their adoration for Christ through self-crucifixion and self-flagellation. Yes, this is insane that even the Roman Catholic Church has tried to discourage the practice there but to no avail. Please don’t try this at home.

In the Philippines, many devout Catholics practice self-crucifixion on Easter replicating Jesus’s suffering. The idea behind this act of insanity was this morbid ritual is to help watch the sins of the world and self-purification. The Roman Catholic Church tried to discourage this for obvious reasons but with little success. It’s also said that it’s just one manifestation of old Filipino religions that require self-flagellation. Other theories suggest it sprang out of a misinterpretation of St. Paul’s Romans 8:13, “If you live after the flesh, you shall die, but if through the spirit you mortify the deeds of the flesh, you shall live.” Of course, while some people may equate self-mortification with purification, I’d suggest you don’t try this at home, please.

20. Bermuda

Bermudans celebrate Good Friday with flying homemade kites, as well as eating codfish cakes and hot cross buns. It’s said that the tradition started when a local teacher from the British Army had difficulty explaining Christ’s ascension to his Sunday school class and made a kite to illustrate it as a result. They also hold kite contests as well.

21.Haiti

In Hati, Holy Week is celebrated with a mixture of Catholic and Voodoo traditions such as colorful parades and traditional “rara” music played on bamboo trumpets, maracas, drums, and coffee cans. Voodoo believers would make pilgrimages to the village of Souvenance, showing devotion to the spirits with drumming, chanting, and animal sacrifices.

22. Europe

In parts of Northwestern Europe, a key tradition is lighting up huge bonfires called Easter Fires on Easter Sunday and Monday. A most common explanation for this is said to originate with the Saxons as a tale of how spring triumphs over winter. However, today it just brings communities together with heavy consumption of lager, gin, and snacks. Egg tapping or knocking is also popular.

23. Cyprus

While the people of Cyprus also paint and hide eggs on Easter for the younger children to find, teenage boys follow this up with a rather violent contest of scouring for scraps of wood to use on a communal bonfire. The neighborhood with the largest bonfire at the end of the day gets the Easter bragging rights until next year. However, since there’s a limited supply of scraps among the teenage boys, it’s not uncommon for police being called in breaking fights over wood scraps or to help put out out-of-control bonfires.

24. Italy

In Florence, Easter is celebrated with a Rube Goldberg machine being carried on a cart, stuffed with explosives, and being set on fire. The result is a 20 minute fireworks show that would make Michael Bay weep.

In Florence, Easter is celebrated with building a Rube Goldberg machine containing shards from the Holy Sepulchre to symbolize the resurrection of Jesus. Called “the holy fire,” it’s placed on a candle as well as dragged through the streets on a massive cart which is over 30ft tall and has been used for well over 300 years before reaching its destination where priests and local officials carry it to the cathedral square. Once there, it’s stuffed with explosives and topped with a fuse and a fake dove when everything is ready. The Cardinal of Florence sets the fake dove ablaze while the bells of Giotto’s campanile ring out to signal that the show is about to start. What follows is 20 minutes of nonstop explosions in the city’s cathedral which would send Michael Bay weeping with adulation. If everything goes according to plan, then the fireworks signify a year of good harvests and successful business.

In Rome on Good Friday, the Pope commemorates the Via Crucis (Way of the Cross) at the Colosseum. During this a huge cross with burning torches illuminates the sky as the 14 Stations of the Cross are described in several languages. However, Americans unfamiliar with this ritual and this significance might interpret this tradition quite differently and with great offense, especially since they’re more likely to link giant burning crosses with white supremacist violence against African Americans. On Holy Saturday and Easter Sunday, Mass is celebrated with thousands of visitors in St. Peter’s Square to

25. Spain

On Holy Thursday, the streets of Verges set the stage for the macabre “Dansa de la Mort” or “Dance of Death.” In a procession traveling through the town, 5 people dress up in skeletons grab the lime light as they move to the sound of drum beats. Each skeleton carries different items with one holding a scythe, a clock without hands, and a banner warning that death could come at any time while two carry a box of ashes. Not the kind of warm sunny Easter most of us would imagine.

Relax, NAACP, these are just Catholic brotherhoods dressed in their robes and hoods for the Holy Week processions in Spain, not a white supremacist Klu Klux Klan meeting. There’s a lot of pride taking part in the Spanish Easter festivities that Antonio Banderas joins his brotherhood in his hometown every year. Seriously, Spanish have been doing this for far longer than KKK has been in existence. Costume similarities are purely coincidental.

This isn’t to say that there are a lot of Easter processions in Spain dating to the Middle Ages. This is performed by many Catholic brotherhoods wearing different colored robes to tell each other apart. However, they also don conical hoods to retain their anonymity, even though they tend to scare the bejesus out of any African American tourist and it doesn’t help that some of these take place at night under candlelight. The music tends to vary according to days consisting of mournful music accompanied by dramatic drum beats on Holy Thursday, utter silence on Good Friday, to celebratory music on Easter Sunday. Many tend to walk barefoot as well as wear shackles on their feet with brotherhoods carrying floats of different scenes related to the Passion of the Christ or the Sorrows of the Virgin Mary. And there is great pride for taking part and it’s said that Antonio Banderas travels to his Malaga hometown every year to take part in this with his brotherhood, “Tears and Favors”, becoming the star attraction.

26. Japan

Though western holidays like Halloween, Christmas, and Saint Patrick’s Day have become rather popular in Japan, Easter is relatively obscure since the country doesn’t have a lot of Christians. However, this doesn’t stop companies from organizing Easter themed promotions in the spring and sometimes even the summer. Tokyo Disneyland hosts an annual “Easter Wonderland” which sometimes runs well into June.

27. Latvia

A known tradition in Latvia is an Easter game played by children which is like conkers but with eggs. Players pair off and used hardboiled colored eggs joined together with string. Competitors bang the ends of the eggs together until one player’s egg breaks. The winner is the one with the stronger egg. Sounds a bit messy to say the least.

28. Guatemala

In Guatemala, the village streets are lined with rugs made from saw dust for the Easter procession which creates trail of powdery rainbows in their wake.

Each Easter in Guatemala, the people lace the streets of their villages with colorful sawdust carpets. On their way to Mass, the procession of faithful walk over the vibrant carpet leaving a trail of powdery rainbows in their wake.

29. Bulgaria

While Bulgarians decorate their Easter eggs, they’re also known to fight with them by pair. The last surviving one is called a “borak.”

30. Argentina

In Argentina, there’s a kitschy theme park called Tierra Santa which is devoted to telling the story of Jesus. On Holy Week, they reenact the Passion within the parks walls. It’s said to attract a lot of tourists.

In Argentina, there is a kitsch theme park dedicated to telling the story of Jesus which unsurprisingly goes into overdrive on Easter. There’s a plastic Jesus that’s resurrected every hour and plastic statues depicting the Passion which is already a must see for the devout with hundreds gathering each hour to watch the statue emerge from a rocky outcrop to survey the crowds. On Easter, actors take up the role to bring the passion to life, carrying the cross through the park and being crucified by Roman soldiers. Sure it’s probably in bad taste but it’s a huge hit in Latin America nevertheless.

In Northern Argentina, there’s an elaborate carnival that begins on Ash Wednesday and lasts all through Lent. In this, mothers and grandmothers gather around a decorated arch and exchange dolls in a ceremony believed to unite women in an eternal bond. On Sunday in an Argentinian version of the Easter Parade, women dress up in colorful ruffled skirts and white hats in masks made with starch and water. Riding on horseback, they singing folksongs on their way to a dance honoring Pukllay, the Spirit of the Carnival. After the ceremony, the burn a large effigy of the Pukllay to signify the end of the celebration a la Burning Man.

31. Jamaica

While Good Friday is a somber time in the Easter season of Holy Week, it pays host to Kingston’s biggest annual street carnival complete with a parade, requisite debaucheries, and even preachers. Also predict the future with egg whites on water.

32. El Salvador

In the town of Texistepeque, there’s a ritual on Easter called “Talciguines” which is supposed to symbolize the fight between Jesus and Satan. Of course, Jesus is always the winner.

33. Wales

On Palm Sunday, the Welsh visit their relatives’ graves to lay flowers as well as stage Welsh singing contests called Gymafa Gan where choirs from various chapels in festivities take part and prominent conductors are invited.

34. United States

For 130 years, the White House has sponsored the Easter egg roll on its South Lawn, which provides a lot of activities for the kids.

For 130 years, the White House has hosted the Easter Egg Roll on its South Lawn. This mainly consists of rolling a colored hardboiled egg with a large serving spoon. But nowadays an egg hunt is included as well along with other sports and crafts.

In Texas, the people of Fredericksburg hold an event called the Easter Fires of Fredericksburg Pageant, where the town gets together to celebrate an 1840 peace treaty with the Comanche and the significance with Easter by reinventing this story. It’s said that the Comanche would light fires in the hills of Fredericksburg to signify that there was no hostility between the settlers and the indigenous people. But as the fires burned the German immigrant children grew worried and to calm them down their parents told them that the fires were the Easter Bunny burning eggs in preparation for the festivities.

New York’s Easter parade from 5th Avenue to 57th Street has a lot of fun festivities with people wearing outlandish Easter outfits and donning their wackiest Easter bonnets.

In New York City, you have the Easter parade that dates back to the 1870s and one of the city’s most significant seasonal celebrations. It begins at the famous Fifth Avenue and finishes north up 57th street. There you’ll find visitors and New Yorkers alike done their most elaborate Easter bonnets.

In Southern Michigan, on Easter tens of thousands of marshmallows are dumped onto by helicopters and are rewarded candy afterwards. This tradition has spread to other areas.

Fun with Easter Eggs

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 13, 2015

Of course, I couldn’t do some posts on Easter without leaving a key tradition: Easter eggs. Now while many believe that Easter eggs once traditionally celebrated as a symbol of fertility and rebirth, in Christianity, they symbolized Jesus’s empty tomb, which in its own twisted way is quite appropriate. However, many don’t know that dying and painting eggs is among one of the older Easter traditions. Most of the time they’re usually chicken eggs, mostly hard boiled. Yet, we also have eggs of plastic and chocolate as well. Of course, while many eggs may just have one color on them, others can be in rather elaborate designs. Then there are some that go on a whole different level such as depicting pop culture icons and such. In this post, you’ll see the many ways people decorate Easter eggs you might not be familiar with. So without further adieu, I shall present these to you.

1. Happy Easter from the wonderful world of Disney.

Of course, these are much better drawings than I could’ve ever done. Then again, I don’t remember the rabbits on top. Guess this person ran out of ideas.

2. “I see a red egg and I want it painted black/No colors any more, I want them to turn black.”

Seems like the Rolling Stones haven’t aged a bit. Then again, they were just as ugly as they are now. Still, hate to find an egg that resembles Keith Richards.

3. Since Easter’s a religious holiday, I couldn’t leave out eggs with Christian motifs.

Now the crucifixion one is about the goriest Easter egg I’ve ever seen so far. Then again, I can’t argue about that being appropriate.

4. Performing on the Easter stag with “Bennie and the Jets,” may I present to you Sir Elton John.

Now this is a perfect Easter egg of Elton John, costume and all with all those feathers like in his heyday during the 1970s. Of course, that will have to come to an end in the 1980s.

5. And everyone assumed that Paul was scrambled in the advent of the Abbey Road album.

I’ll be putting a few Beatles stuff in my post on Easter eggs. This is from the Abbey Road album, which was one of their last collaborations. Still, love it how they’re playing in a band on this one.

6. Celebrate your Easter with the magic of Stephen Spielberg with this E. T. egg.

Maybe that’s because an Indiana Jones Easter egg design would’ve had more difficulty. Still, as ugly as E. T. is you can’t really think he’s any less than adorable.

7. Get ready for one wild bachelor party in Vegas with this Easter egg tribute to The Hangover or the one which launched the careers of Bradley Cooper and Zach Galifianakis.

Oh, God, I’d hate to see what Bradley Cooper is about to do with Mike Tyson’s pet tiger, which is most likely illegally possessed since it’s an endangered species.

8. For those who like Peter Sellers and Henry Mancini music, here’s an Easter egg diorama from The Pink Panther movies.

Would’ve liked to seen an Easter egg rendering of Chief Inspector Dreyfus who later goes nuts. Still, I can only consider Peter Sellers as the one and only Inspector Clouseau and no one else.

9. For those in love with Japanese cuteness, here are some nice Easter eggs of Hello Kitty.

Sure they may not have ears but they may not have looked great with them anyway. Still, quite cute.

10. This Easter egg tribute of Barack Obama would certainly be commendable to any Egghead Commander and Chief.

Now that’s a great scene of the Oval Office. Also like how he has those two pens and the globe on his desk.

11. May these Batman Easter eggs make your Easter a rather dark night in Gotham, indeed.

Of course, presented here are Batman, Catwoman, Mr. Freeze, the Joker, Harley Quinn, Two-Face, the Penguin, the Riddler, and Clayface. Wonder why they don’t have Robin, Batgirl, Bane, Dr. Strange, Poison Ivy, the Scarecrow, and Alfred.

12. For those who are fans of the National Audobon Society’s guide to North American Birds, then today’s your lucky day.

Almost look as if they do in the guidebook with their respective silhouettes. Of course, Audobon often killed birds so he could save them and paint them in his book better. And boy, his bird paintings are awesome.

13. “But I would not feel so all alone/Everybody must get poached.”

Yes, this is an Easter egg rendition of legendary American singer-songwriter Bob Dylan. Well, he wrote some of the best music ever which has influenced millions. But his singing is much to be desired.

14. Ladies and gentlemen, Elvis has left the building.

Interestingly, Elvis Presley looked a lot like this during his Las Vegas years. Of course, this is what happens when you’ve been on too many drugs and peanut butter and banana sandwiches.

15. For you silent film buffs out there, this Easter egg Charlie Chaplin is particularly charming.

Of course, Chaplin was one of the most significant filmmakers in movie history who entertained countless audiences as the Tramp during the 1920s and early 1930s. Yet, he’d be kicked out of the country in the 1950s for his left wing political views.

16. For those who have boys, these superhero Easter eggs should be a real treat for a holiday with pastel colors.

Comprised here are Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, the Green Lantern, the Flash, Spiderman, Iron Man, the Incredible Hulk, and Captain America. Still, I wonder why Thor, Black Widow, and Nick Fury aren’t included.

17. For those into foul humor and toilet jokes, you can’t go wrong with these South Park Easter eggs here.

Now I’m sure the Kenny one is going to have horrible things done to it after the picture since he practically dies in a lot of episodes.

18. “He’s an egg ball wizard/There has to be a twist./An egg ball wizard’s got such a supple wrist.”

Of course, The Who known for their rock opera Tommy about a deaf, dumb, and blind pinball whiz. Still, I’m not sure what I’d say if any elementary age school kids ask about what happened to Keith Moon.

19. For those who like kicking ass reptiles from the sewers, you’d love these Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Easter eggs.

Of course, I wonder if anyone could remember that the turtles were named after Renaissance artists like Leonardo Da Vinci, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael. Of course, in real life Leonardo was the inventor and technological genius of the 4. Oh, and that Leonardo and Michelangelo were both gay.

20. From “That’ll Be the Day” to the Day the Music Died, Buddy Holly and the Crickets were one of the best known 1950s rock n’ roll acts.

Man, it’s hard not to imagine what Buddy Holly’s career would’ve amounted to if he didn’t get on that plane with J. P. Richardson and Ritchie Valens that fateful day.

21. Since they’re so iconic with the black and white make up, rock and roll all night with these KISS Easter eggs and party every day.

I’m not really a KISS fan but I did put a KISS nutcracker ensemble for my nutcracker post back in 2013. This is a great Easter equivalent.

22. Not sure what to do with those Easter eggs, how about egg totem poles?

Now these may not look like real totem poles. But they’re quite intricate and I like them.

23. Tissue and construction paper make great flowers as well as Easter egg decorations.

Now these are quite pretty and so intricate that I suspect someone is either getting paid for it or has way too much time on their hands.

24. “I am the eggman, they are the eggmen/I am the walrus, goo goo goo joob”

So what if “I Am the Walrus” came out in the late 1960s and these are the Fab Four from 1964? I had to use those lines sometime.

25. Bring the magic of Oz to life with this Easter egg diorama of The Wizard of Oz.

Seems more likely to traumatize your friends than the real thing. Still not as good as Gone with the Wind even if the movie denigrated African Americans as happy slaves.

26. “It was twenty years ago today/Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play/They’ve been going in and out of style/But they’re guaranteed to raise a smile”

“So may I introduce to you/The act you’ve known for all these years/Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” Wait until they get to Billy Shears.

27. Leafs always make great decoration for Easter eggs if you want to go with a nature theme.

Yes, they’re pretty. But I wonder if they were still around after most of the leaves were already swept up during the fall.

28. For those who love Lego, you might love having these Lego heads on your Easter eggs.

Now these are just adorable. But only one of them is explicitly female. Yet, we can change that if we add hair to some of the others.

29. When it comes to flower decorations, you can’t go wrong with flowers.

Of course, these buttons may be of the same shape but the smaller ones not always of the same size and color.

30. For you Despicable Me fans, these minon Easter eggs are as easy as pie.

When it comes to Despicable Me, almost everyone remembers the minions and how cute they are. Still, I see a lot of them in a lot of artistic renditions because they’re an east craft subject.

31. Go underwater with these deep sea diving Easter eggs.

Well, I don’t mean literally of course. But I daresay these look quite adorable in scuba gear and flippers.

32. Defend the Imperial Empire with these Imperial Stormtrooper Easter eggs.

Cheer up, Rebels. Sure they may seem intimidating and kill Luke’s aunt and uncle. Yet, Imperial Stormtroopers are known for being notorious bad shots since they’re never seen hitting anything.

33. For those who loved WALL-E, you might love these EVE Easter eggs.

Well, the EVE we know from WALL-E is the one with the eyes and the plant sign on it. But still, quite cute.

34. For those repressed art students out there, you can always paint your Easter eggs by hand if you want to.

Now these are quite intricate and pretty. They also match the dish they’re on. Sure hate to see a small child break these.

35. When it comes to decorating Easter eggs, feel free to accessorize.

Now this person seems to spend more time decorating the eggs’ outfits than the actual eggs themselves.

36. Relive the Tim Burton magic with this Easter egg tribute to Alice in Wonderland.

Like The Wizard of Oz one, this also seems much creepier and likely to traumatize kids than the real thing. This is especially true with the Mad Hatter, the White Rabbit, as well as Tweedledee and Tweedledum.

37. Seems like one of their friends was taken from the egg carton and into the frying pan.

And it seems like they know one of them's next in the skillet of horrors. And some of them are seen screaming.

And it seems like they know one of them’s next in the skillet of horrors. Some of them are seen screaming.

38. Jam with the Jamaican reggae beat with Bob Marley.

Rarely do we have the traditions of pot and Easter merged in the same creation as an Easter egg version of Bob Marley.

39. For all you Scarface fans out there, say hello to my little friend!

Now no parent would certainly want their kid to find an Easter egg with Al Pacino’s face on it since most of his movies are rated R. Not to mention, they tend to be rather violent with sex, swearing, and substance abuse.

40. Hey, look, I found Waldo!

Then again, it’s pretty easy to find Waldo when he’s a decorated Easter egg and the others are quite plain so to speak.

41. For fans of the HBO series Game of Thrones, these Easter eggs are for you.

Of course, like everything by George R. R. Martin, they may only be as fun until they suffer a really horrible death like some peoples favorite Game of Thrones characters.

42. For those who grew up with Nintendo, you’d sure love these Super Mario Brothers Easter eggs.

Of course, we all know what these mushrooms do in the game. But watch out for the bullets.

43. Enjoy the magic of Hogwarts this Easter with these Harry Potter Easter eggs.

Now these include, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Snape, Voldemort, Dumbledore, Nagini, and the Golden Snitch. Of course, I’d also like to see ones of Luna, Hagrid, Neville, Malfoy, Sirius, Lupin, and Hedwig but you take what you can get I guess.

44. These Easter egg bees are as sweet as honey.

Now these may be simple in some respects. But they’re nevertheless adorable to say the least.

45. For those who love video games, I’m sure you can’t go wrong with Angry Birds.

Of course, the green pig is going to get it sooner or later since it’s surrounded by birds that really seem pissed off beyond all means.

46. Sometimes felt can be handy when it comes to Easter egg decorations.

Sure love spring flowers and I think these beautiful eggs have great designs on them. Once again, someone must have too much time on their hands.

47. Splash into the world of Amity Island in the summer with Jaws. But swim carefully.

Seems like this pipe cleaner lady doesn’t have long to live. Seriously, she shouldn’t be so stupid enough to swim in shark infested waters.

48. Celebrate this Easter with, “Purple Haze” with this Easter egg Jimi Hendrix.

Of course, he may be one of the greatest guitarists of all time and played the “Star Spangled Banner” at Woodstock. Unfortunately, he died young.

49. Now these lady bug Easter eggs will go well in anybody’s basket.

Now these are so adorable and quite concurrent with spring. Of course, some lady bugs are male, by the way.

50. Enjoy a good scare this Easter with these eggs depicting characters from The Nightmare Before Christmas.

Sure The Nightmare Before Christmas may have absolutely nothing to do with Easter but that doesn’t mean you can’t make eggs from that film. Does it?

51. Now I daresay, this London Easter egg always knows how to retain a stiff upper lip.

Of course, it’s one of those royal guards you see at Buckingham Palace. So don’t try to make it crack beyond all means. Seriously, you don’t want to do that.

52. Sometimes it helps when you decorate your Easter eggs with string.

However, once Easter is over, these can be a pain in the ass to peel off. But they are quite colorful to get my drift.

53. Join Snoopy and the gang with this Easter egg tribute to Peanuts.

Seems weird that the cast seems like a bunch of coneheads as far as Easter egg tributes go. I mean their heads seemed quite round in the comics.

54. So, yes, you can do embroidery on your Easter eggs as these specimens show.

Of course, after Easter, these eggs would soon be a pain in the ass to peel off. I’ll say. Still, for the moment they’re quite pretty.

55. For you Trekkies out there, these Star Trek themed Easter eggs are for you.

Of course, they had a set of Easter eggs for the characters but the Red shirt ones all got broken. So the person decided to use logos and symbols instead.

56. Seems like someone lost their yolk.

And everybody is in a state of panic over it. Guess that somebody cracked it over the edge.

57. For you Pixar lovers out there, here are Easter eggs of the aliens from Toy Story.

Of course, we all know these aliens worship a massive claw in the vending machine they live in. I mean we’ve all seen the movies.

58. “She’s got eggs, she knows how to use them.”

Yes, that’s ZZ Top all right, which hail all the way from Texas. Of course, this person did a great job depicting the frontmen’s beards.

59. Catch em’ all this Easter season with these Pokemon egg designs.

Now these are quite adorable and intricate designs. Still, the scientifically accurate version on Laughing Squid has some disturbing implications.

60. When it comes to decorating Easter eggs, you can apply just about anything.

Now these are way beyond any artistic endeavor I could undergo with art supplies. These are just so beautiful to say the least.

Fun with Easter Bonnets

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 11, 2015

I may not take part in this on Easter since I live in the country, but for a long time in cities, it was a tradition for people to got to church on Easter Sunday before attending the annual Easter parade. And it was there where women donned their Easter bonnets which are technically hats. Of course, these can come in all shapes and sizes at times such as the simple straw with flowers and ribbons to basically the Easter equivalent of the Christmas sweater. And some of these bonnets can be as outrageous that you’d think they’re designed by Lady Gaga as well as not exclusively worn by women. Thus, you won’t see just ladies looking ridiculous and in some hats that may not have much to do with Easter or spring anyway. So without further adieu, here are some of the crazy, wild, Easter bonnets you may ever see.

1. Wake up this Easter with sunny side up for breakfast.

These two must be real egg heads going out in those hats. I wonder if they have one wearing a bacon hat.

2. This woman is bound to poke somebody’s eye out if she’s not careful.

Yeah, I can totally understand why the guy is wearing sunglasses for protection against the pointy sticks.

3. Another great motif for Easter bonnets are bird’s nests.

Now I wonder if any real birds try to lay eggs in it. Either that or make out with the bird depicted building it which is fake.

4. Forget Easter bonnets, check out this Easter headdress.

Someone must’ve had too much time on their hands to make this one. Either that, or she’s Lady Gaga’s costume designer judging by that flamboyant hat.

5. I dub this hat style, “laundry basket.”

And it seems that these people might be in need of a major neck massage after they’re done having these large flower laundry baskets on their heads all day.

6. For the Pixar fan, this hat depicting the house from Up might catch your fancy.

Basically an Easter bonnet made with a small doll house and some balloons. Still, I’m not sure if this has anything to do with Easter but I like it.

7. Now this seems like this gives “put a flower in your hair” a whole new meaning.

Man, I wonder how she managed to put that hat on without putting her hair in a bun first. However, I have doubts on whether it’ll survive intact when she takes it off.

8. I give you the hat of a 100 eyes.

In some way this hat is just as whimsical as much as it is creepy. Seriously, the basket is covered with eyes.

9. Now I say this woman’s Easter hat is houseplant couture.

You can say that her large hat almost matches the scenery. Of course, she sometimes has to occasionally water it .

10. Of course, sometimes Easter is the time of year when men get in touch with their feminine side.

And when it comes to metrosexuality, this guy is totally fabulous with his coiffure in flowers, chicks, eggs, butterflies, and wire fencing.

11. Now in accordance with spring, you can’t go wrong with a flower pot on your head.

I think the flowers are supposed to go on top of the pot, which has bunnies and grass. Seriously, it’s the kind of hat I’d see in a Dr. Seuss story.

12. Another great motif on Easter bonnets are beehives, like this one.

Hey, at least it’s not a real one because that would be bad. Still, the mutant bees are on the edges while the hive bees are much smaller.

13. For boys, a partial colored egg with paper machete makes a great Easter bonnet.

This boy is trying to smile for the camera but deep down he feels so self-conscious about the possibility of his fellow classmates beating him up in school.

14. Nothing makes a great Easter bonnet for a parade than one of a giant chicken or something.

What the hell is that bird? I know it can’t be a phoenix because it doesn’t have flames coming out of it. Seriously, that looks like some sort of cross between a swan and a chicken.

15. Now I call this one, “Tigger at Gitmo.”

I wonder what the animals in the Hundred Acre Wood will think when they discover that their bouncy friend is being held as an enemy combatant. Seriously, since what does this trama inducing look have to do with Easter?

16. For Easter, it’s always manly to wear a hat of pink bunny ears.

Even funnier is that this guy is the King of Sweden. Yes, may I proclaim that the King of Sweden is wearing a pink bunny hat for Easter.

17. Carrot Top, allow me to introduce you to Bo Carrot.

Well, at least she doesn’t have to worry about shopping for a snack. Still, this is pretty crazy if you think about it.

18. Then again, for a boy’s Easter bonnet, I suppose Angry Birds is much more appropriate.

Even better is that these Angry Birds are made from Easter eggs as far as I can tell. Seriously, this is a better than colored eggs. At least for boys.

19. Forget the Easter bonnet, how about a bunny cap?

Now this seems rather easy to make such as cardboard, cotton, and a cap. Not to mention, Little Jimmy is less likely to be beat up in school over it.

20. Nothing brings in the spirit of spring than an Easter bonnet of a watering can.

Now that watering can display is pretty. But I wonder if this girl is going to need a neck massage after the Easter parade though.

21. Now this one captures the essence of spring: butterflies, flowers, and a scorpion?

I’m not sure whether a scorpion belongs in a holiday that includes cute bunnies, chicks, flowers, colored eggs. But, hey, what do I know?

22. With Easter bonnets, the bigger the flowers the better.

Yet, I’m not sure if this gigantic rose is really improving things for now. Seriously, this reminds me of a Kentucky Derby hat for some reason.

23. For Easter, you can’t be the belle of the parade without a bonnet of shiny rainbow eggs.

I’m not sure if the eggs enhance the hat or not. Either way, at least if she wears it at night, it’ll certainly be quite reflective.

24. For egg hunts, paper machete egg bonnets are perfect for the kids.

However, this little girl doesn’t seem to think so. In fact, she seems to wonder whether she seems to resemble an alien from outer space in it.

25. When it comes to Easter bonnets, there’s no limit to how high you can go.

She should be lucky that most churches have rather high ceilings in their naves. But seriously, that’s a lot of flowers and eggs.

26. Of course, there’s no great Easter bonnet than one of a giant Creme egg.

Then again, I’m sure the egg doesn’t have any chocolate in it. But this little girl seems happy.

27. Of course, you can’t celebrate Easter without a garden hat.

Then again, if this didn’t have garden stuff on it, I would’ve mistaken it for some tribal headdress on some island in the Pacific.

28. Nothing says Easter like a bonnet with a couple of assault rifles on it?

Okay, I’m sure defending your right to shoot Bambi and all his wabbit fwiends is perfectly fine. But why do it on Easter on all holidays? Seriously, it’s a holiday to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus and new life, not untimely deaths on school campuses and 3rd world countries!

29. With blue ribbons and a pink basket, this guy is in his Easter best.

Sure he may look ridiculous but he so doesn’t care what the guys at the office think for now. Seriously, his little girl probably designed the hat in the first place.

30. Of course, it doesn’t always have to be the woman who wears the flowers.

Seems like he’s enjoying himself in his white, orange, and purple Easter lilies. Too bad real lilies don’t bloom until later in the spring or summer.

31. Of course, this girl will be the envy of the egg hunt with her hatching egg hat.

Of course, alongside the chick, there are smaller eggs in the egg as well. Which makes me beg the question.

32. Now this girl is lucky since she’s wearing the bonnet with the golden egg.

Now she may want to watch out for any fairy tale creatures who would do what it takes to obtain it. And then there will be a Maltese Falcon situation on their hands.

33. You can say this Easter bonnet can make anyone as pretty as a peacock.

Now that’s a lot of feathers under the brim. Wonder if she’s wearing a sombrero, which can explain a lot.

34. Make sure your Easter bonnet is all chicked out.

Now this woman seems to have it all yellowed out with daffodils and chickies. But I’m not sure if having a large chick on top is utterly cute or ridiculous.

35. Since chicks like to frolic, you always need a fence to contain them.

Yeah, but their space is limited since they’re blocked by a giant sky and cloud thing in the center. Of course, this boy is wondering, “Why do I have to wear this?”

36. While it’s mainly associated with Thanksgiving, I’m sure a cornucopia would make a fine Easter bonnet with some spring trimmings.

Now I’m sure this may be just as good for Thanksgiving since it seems more appropriate for fall than spring. But who am I to judge?

37. With Easter bonnets, it’s time to spring into action.

I don’t know about you, but I think all these springly decorations can be a bit excessive. The fake cemetery flower business must be booming this time a year.

38. For some Easter bonnets are a way to celebrate Easter. For others, a way to show off their Pez dispenser collection.

While Pez candies can be quite disgusting, we all better remember the containers for some reason. Also like the dangling toy rabbits around this guy’s hat.

39. Sometimes when an Easter bonnet isn’t enough, a stuffed duck has to have one, too.

And this duck even has some accessories like French fries, nail polish, and a couple of other things. But this girl seems happy.

And this duck even has some accessories like French fries, nail polish, and a couple of other things along with an enormous flower bonnet. But this girl seems happy.

40. Now you can’t have an Easter parade without some Easter basket bonnets on the streets, too.

Now this woman seems like a real basket case according to wearing a hat like that she doesn’t seem too thrilled with.

41. Be on the sunny side of Easter with this sunflower hat.

Man, that’s a huge sunflower. And with so many petals, too. Still, I’m sure sunflowers aren’t in season this time of year since they come later in the summer.

42. Seems like soccer is a big game between the chicks and bunnies this Easter.

Seems like they have bunnies and chicks the same size as well as a small human referee. So how does that happen?

43. Now it seems like these chicks are hatching in the egg cartons for some reason.

Now this is pretty crazy. I’m sure those chicks are mounted somehow. Also, I’m sure that eggs are only available at a dozen in stores.

44. Man, now that’s calling putting all your eggs in one basket, or hat for that matter.

Hope that none of those plastic eggs have candy in them or you know what the kiddies will do to that. Still, how does her head withstand so much stuff?

45. For the white and fluffy crowd, you might want your Easter Bonnet cloud to contain plastic grocery bags and white feathers.

Then again, those could be faulty airbags from some car company. Still, she seems like the perfect woman for the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.

46. Seems like the chicks on this girl’s Easter bonnet are already hatching.

Oh, shit. She’s an Easter bonnet contest winner during the High Clere Castle Easter egg hunt? Seriously, why wasn’t there an Easter egg hunt episode of Downton Abbey then?

47. Want a bee in your Easter bonnet?

Now this bee may seem quite cute since it’s plush. However, you wouldn’t want to be stung by it mainly due to its size.

48. Now I call these women the “Orange Brigade.”

Now I’m sure these women’s towering hats probably put them as members of some kind of club, family, or cult.

49. When it comes to decorating your Easter bonnet, you can’t go wrong with Peeps.

I mean those inedible marshmallow sugar candies have to be used in some way since they’re utterly unfit for human consumption. Still, pretty amazing.

50. Now this girl’s hat is in the blue flower spirit of spring.

Let’s hope no graves were robbed of their flower arrangements during the making of this humongous flower hat. Seriously, these posies are fake, which I’ve seen all the time at the cemetery near where I live.

51. Bunny out of your hat or on top of it?

Of course, Ann Miller can have this kind of hat who was kind of the Lady Gaga of her day as far as fashions go. Then again, this style makes any of Lady Gaga’s Easter bonnets seem tame by comparison.

52. This hat gives, “Tiptoe Through the Tulips” a whole new meaning.

Yeah, I’m sure Tiny Tim didn’t mean that when he sang “Tiptoe Through the Tulips,” in that falsetto voice. Seriously, this is crazy.

53. I now bring you, the Carrot Tops.

Now I wonder how they get those carrots to stand up? Hope they’re not attracting some rabbits with those giant carrots because that would be bad.

54. Nothing says Easter like a bonnet depicting two rabbits in their outdoor bathroom near the farm.

I don’t know about you but I’m kind of freaked out that I can’t see this person’s head for some reason. Probably the fact that the person is alive.

55. Nothing makes a better Easter bonnet than a bunny in a flower pot.

Now this is interesting. Still, I wonder what kind of neck strain this bonnet may cause after wearing it for a few hours.

56. And out of this hat grows an Easter egg tree.

The tree from this hat seems like it comes straight out of a Dr. Seuss story. Still, quite original if you ask me.

57. A big bouquet for your yellow watering can?

Now I wonder how does she wear this hat without straining her neck with all the weight of those plastic flowers I’ve seen in a cemetery.

58. Nothing like an Easter bonnet consisting of a basket tied to your head.

Now isn’t that a bit lopsided in terms of weight distribution? Seriously, it looks ridiculous! Still, at least she has a place to receive tips.

59. Sometimes it’s not just the women who go all out with flowers.

Behold, the Aztec God Xochipilli the Flower Prince in his Easter Sunday best. Why he wears his flower headdress during a Christian holiday, I’ll never know.

60. Nothing makes an Easter bonnet like one of a giant ant at a picnic.

Now this is perhaps one of the few Easter bonnets on this post that may be truly terrifying. Also what the hell do giant ants have to do with Easter for God’s sake?

61. Of course, you can’t celebrate the Easter season without including candy.

Now this must be a huge undertaking, especially when it comes to including Hershey’s and Crunch on this.

62. Now these guys want to look their best for the Easter parade in their prettiest hats.

And all these manly men seem to love how their hats go with their overalls, save perhaps one.

63. When it comes to Easter bonnets, you can’t have too many flowers.

Now this is Xochiquetzal the Aztec Goddess of love and flowers. Unfortunately, she’s not as nice as her male counterpart and demands a sacrifice every 8 years.

64. Don’t look now, but I think I see these weird green hat ladies here.

Now while these hats may reflect an early spring, the color scheme is much to be desired. Seriously, they seem rather dull in color as well as make the wearers look ridiculous for some reason.

65. Now there’s nothing better than a rabbit proof fence on your straw Easter bonnet.

I’ve seen better. Seriously, if that rabbit were real, it would totally jump it. Then again, you have the aesthetics to consider.

66. A bird in the hand is worth 2 in the Easter bonnet.

I don’t know about you but this seems like a creepy old lady’s hat than an Easter bonnet. At least to me.

67. When it comes to pussy willow flowers you can never go overboard.

Okay, this is quite extravagant. Flowers are probably fake but they seem to have eggs hanging on them.

68. Nothing says Easter than having a crown with a giant chick.

Now that guy better be quite strong since that chick sure looks monstrously heavy for some reason.

69. For Easter bonnet decorations, jelly beans do quite well.

Of course, these candies taste really disgusting that you might as well put them to better use.

70. Now this lady seems to have left all her Easter eggs hanging.

Now I wonder how she could wear this hat and see. I mean those plastic eggs seem to obscure her eyes.

71. Whether you’re in the Easter parade or Kabuki Theater, this bonnet is for you.

Of course, if you’re unfamiliar with Japanese theater, despite the extravagant costumes, we should be aware that all the actors involved are guys, even as the leading ladies.

72. Of course, no one can have a hat with rabbit ears as tall as this girl.

Now those are long rabbit ears. Must hear a lot noises from miles away such as a bear shitting in the woods.

73. Seems like this beehive basket needs some flowers.

Now this might have unfortunate implications if those were real flowers and the bees were alive. Imagine the sting marks on this woman.

74. You can’t do better on Easter than have your ducks all in a row.

Of course, I wonder how this guy managed to get smaller and smaller ducks. It’s like a rubber ducky nesting doll.

75. Now these flowers on this hat make you wonder if she paid a visit to the Mad Hatter.

Now these flowers seem like they’re from out of this world. Oh, yes, I forget they’re plastic and probably made for cemeteries.

76. With flowers and butterflies, you can’t do much better.

If these were real, they’d certainly be overdoing it on the Miracle Gro. Still, you have to hand it to the person who designed this.

77. Nothing makes an Easter bonnet work like one depicting a bunny and a chicken?

I bet you that chicken is probably taxidermy. I mean it almost looks quite real if you ask me.

78. When it comes to Easter bonnets, some couples feel the need to match.

And it seems no different for the king and queen of the Tropicana pineapple kingdom they rule together (okay, this is just a joke but please their hats are outrageous).

79. Nothing makes a great Easter bonnet than one of a hatching chick from its egg.

I don’t know about you but I think this chick’s wings are away out of proportion to its body. Just saying.

80. Easter Bunny Bot would like to wish everyone a very Happy Easter.

Now I don’t know about you but it seems the Easter Bunny Bot is either the Easter Bunny’s robotic assistant or from a different planet entirely.

The Wonderful World of Peep Shows (No, Not That Kind) (Second Edition)

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 7, 2015

Last year in March, I did a post on peep dioramas since it’s the Easter season and that I think those inedible marshmallow and sugar confections were better enjoyed that way. Since last year, I’ve had 567 views on that post as well as 19 Facebook shares. Now these are rather moderate numbers compared to some of my other posts, holidays or otherwise. But since I enjoyed doing this post so much and think peep dioramas are awesome, I decided to do another edition. I mean as long as they keep making sugary marshmallow products unfit for human consumption we might as well have some fun with them, especially since not all of us are repressed art students who like making dioramas in their spare time. Besides, I need to a break between all this Easter kitsch stuff. So without further adieu, here are some more marshmallow peep dioramas for your Easter sensibilities.

1. Join NBC’s Chris Hansen on this weeks exclusive episode of Dateline: To Catch a Peep-A-Tor.

Looks like the brown hairy rabbit caught on tape was caught on tape corrupting a minor. Yep, and I see a bottle of Jack Daniels and some beer cans, too.

2. Those growing up in the 1980s may remember Peep-Wee’s Playhouse with Peep Weep Herman himself.

Of course, what happened to Pee Wee Herman’s career servers a valuable lesson to children: never masturbate in a movie theater, even if it’s and adult cinema showing a porno.

3. For those who missed it, here’s a peep diorama of Kim Kardashian’s wedding to Kanye West from a very special episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

Actually, I really don’t give a shit about the Kardashians and really don’t think they bear any lasting significance in American culture. Yet, this peep diorama is very well done.

4. Come on down to The Price Is Right with your host, Bob Bunny.

Looks like the prizes here are a trip to Rio de Janiero and a brand new car. Also, Bob Bunny here reminding you to control the pet population. Have your pets spayed or neutered.

5. Moses presents himself to Pharaoh to, “Let my peeple go!”

Hate to be the Hebpeep slaves under the hot Ancient Egyptian sun all day, probably with nothing on.

6. “I’m a single bunny/I’m a single bunny.”

Never has Beyonce's most iconic music video has been so adorable. No wonder Kanye West thinks she awesome, which says something since he's an egotistical prig.

Never has Beyonce’s most iconic music video has been so adorable. No wonder Kanye West thinks she’s awesome, which says something since he’s an egotistical prig.

7. Nothing brought peeps together during the 1970s like the roller derby scene.

But like disco, it fell out of favor after being a major fad. Yet, having roller derby fall into obscurity is a good thing since it’s a rather violent sport.

8. Relive the chest bursting magic of Alien with this peep diorama.

Now I just can't wait for Ellen Ripeep to destroy it at the end. But, yes, when you see the something bursting out of a guy's chest, it's a take off from this movie.

Now I just can’t wait for Ellen Ripeep to destroy it at the end. But, yes, when you see something bursting out of a guy’s chest, it’s a take off from this movie.

9. Looks like this is a job for Marvel’s the Avengpeeps.

Join your favorite Marvel Avengepeeps in this explosive, action packed adventure. There’s The Incredipeep Hulk, Iron Peep, the Mightpeep Thor, Hawkpeep, Black Widpeep, and Captain Americpeep.

10. Vincent Van Peep paints another self-portrait.

Of course, this is after he cut off his ear as we can tell by the bandage on his face.

11. Seems like the native peeps are restless on their island.

And it seems like they’re offering some helpless white damsel peep as a sacrifice to their giant bunny peep god. Yeah, where is our great white hero now?

12. Of course, no peep competition can be complete without Grant Wood’s American Gothpeep.

Nevertheless, they do a lot renditions of this iconic American painting all the time that it’s a national treasure.

13. If you like Japanese food, feast your eyes on some marshmallow peep sushi.

Of course, only the soy sauce in this diorama is fit for human consumption. Everything else, not so much.

14. Watch these two Swedish peeps try to assemble some IKEA furniture.

Well, assembling the chair was a piece of cake. The end table, not so much.

15. I show you this diorama to remind you of the dire need to stop the illegal wildpeep trade.

God, I’d hate to see what all those chicks and bunnies went through. So sad.

16. Step into Alice’s adventures in Wonderland with this peep diorama you’d remember.

Well, at least this one is considerably less traumatizing and drug inducing than the Disney version, which was rather trippy to say the least.

17. “Tonight, one of you peeps will betray me.”

Of course, you can easily identify Judas in this. Just look at the eyes on each of the apostles.

17. May I present to you, the hit movie Life of Peep.

I like how on this Life of Pi diorama, the raft is an actual pie.

19. New Jersey Governor Chris Chrispeep closes the George Washingpeep Bridge during rush hour.

Of course, this won’t help Chris Chrispeep at all during the GOP presidential primary, which is America’s equivalent of the Upper Class Twit of the Year Competition. Trust me, it’s easy to see why I vote Democrat, besides being rather liberal on most social issues to begin with.

20. This peep diorama brings you into the Campbell’s Soup Factory.

Today’s product is Split Peep Soup which contains an inedible mix of marshmallow and sugar as well as Campbell’s signature ingredient: salt.

21. “You came in like a wrecking peep.”

Now I just couldn’t pass this one up since it’s an iconic scene Miley Cyrus will always be remembered for.

22. Experience American history with this peep diorama depicting the Lincoln assassination at Ford’s Theater on April 14, 1865.

Of course, this was when John Wilkes Booth jumped off the presidential balcony and onto the stage, which resulted in a broken leg.

23. Discover the magic of Wes Anderson with his 2012 movie Moonrise Peepdom.

Now after seeing this, I can't wait for a peep diorama depicting The Grand Budapest Hotel.

Now after seeing this, I can’t wait for a peep diorama depicting The Grand Bunnypest Hotel. Wes Anderson is such an underrated genius.

24. Experience the final moments of Harry Peeper and the Deathly Mallows as Harry goes up against Voldepeep during the climatic Battle of Hogwarts.

Now I had a Harry Potter peep diorama in the post from last year. But this was so well made that I couldn’t pass it up. And they even have Fred dead and Neville killing Nagini.

25. From Gettysburg 1863 to Washington 1963, Americans stand to say that all peeps are created equal in a land of the peeple, by the peeple, and for the peeple shall not perish on the earth.

Sure they may be a hundred years apart, but I think it’s a great tribute to American history. Well, better than what they have in Texas history textbooks anyway.

26. Indiana Peep is back with another thrilling adventure.

And it seems like he’s being chased by natives for possibly destroying an ancient temple filled with working machinery just to get a golden trinket that belongs in a museum.

27. Step into the world of Dr. Seuss with The Peepax.

Or that Dr. Seuss children’s book that shows kids how insatiable corporate greed can cause almost irreparable environmental harm if there are no measures for sustainability. Though the Oncler wins, his prosperity doesn’t last which leaves him in a polluted wasteland alone.

28. “We are gathered here today to bid farewell to the Hostess Twinkie.”

Then again, twinkies are still being made, but by a private company. Yet, this was done when Hostess went bankrupt. Still, pretty funny.

29. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you March of the Peepguins.

Of course, we all know that penguins don’t live in igloos or use fishing rods. Those props were just for giggles.

30. Join these bunnies for a night at the opera with Richard Wagner’s Ring Cycle.

Of course, we all know that this opera was responsible for the fat lady with a horned helmet singing. Not to mention, it perpetuated the now inaccurate notion of Vikings wearing helmets during their raids.

31. Discover the joys of Impressionism with a peep diorama of Georges Seurat’s A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte.

Sure you might not know the name of the painting, but you’ve probably seen it somewhere. Now this is a perfect rendition.

32. “I still have a dream, a dream deeply rooted in the American dream – one day this nation will rise up and live up to its creed, “We hold these truths to be self evident: that all peeps are created equal.” I have a dream…”

Never has history come to such life in a peep diorama as this one on the March on Washington.

Never has history come to such life in a peep diorama as this one on the 1963 March on Washington.

33. Could it be? Why, yes, it’s Mary Peepins.

Now this inedible sugar coated marshmallow bunny may say that a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. But it also can lead to Type 2 diabetes.

34. Get an exclusive sneak peek of Season 3 of Peepton Abbey.

Of course, for those who haven’t seen the 3rd season, I think I might’ve spoiled the ending, especially on what happened to Matthew.

35. “Representing District 12 for the 74th annual Hunger Games are Peepa Mellark and Katniss Everbun. May the odds be in your favor.”

Sure I did The Hunger Games in last year’s peep post. But I think this one is quite good and captures the spirit of the books and movies. Love the Effie Trinket chick.

36. Ladies and gentlemen, the Beatles.

And it seems that all the chicks in the audience are just gaga over them on the Ed Sullivbun Show in 1964.

37. Relive the romance of Rose and Jack in James Cameron’s 1997 epic Peeptanic.

“I’m king of the world.” Yet, Jack never foresaw the iceberg that would doom the ship and his life.

38. Peep Francis greets onlookers at Saint Peeper’s Square in his peepmobile.

Now while I think the peepmobile is quite ingenious, I especially adore the Swiss guard uniforms here.

39. Of course, no US cross country trip would be complete without a visit to South Dakota’s Mount Peepmore National Memorial.

Yes, we can’t forget seeing the rock images of George Washingpeep, Thomas Jeffersbun, Peddy Roosevelt, and Peepraham Lincoln.

40. Now I couldn’t have a peep post without one featuring the minions from Despicable Meep.

This diorama probably features the sequel since there are purple ones on the premises. Still, they’re probably easy to make.

41. Take a stroll down memory lane with the famed Ninendo game Super Mario Bunnies.

Basically this is the game that says that taught us that mushrooms make us grow and that shiny flowers allow us to shoot fireballs.

42. “Fraa-jeel-aay! Huh! Must be Italian!”

Sure I know this is from A Christmas Story. But I couldn’t resist the scene when Ralphie’s dad uncovers the legendary leg lamp.

43. “All we are saying is give peeps a chance.”

Yes, but when it comes to sex, drugs, and rock n’ roll, I’ll just go with the rock n’ roll but with a little sex in it.

44. “Come on down to South Peeps and meet some friends of mine.”

Still, I have to give this person credit that at least he didn’t kill Kenny in this diorama.

45. Relive the magic of the original Star Wars Trilogy with The Peep Strikes Back.

Kind of like how they have Han Solo depicted as a bunny peep frozen in a chocolate bar.

46. Uncover the ancient Roman gladiator games with this peep diorama of the Roman Colosseum.

Will Bunnius Peepsimus slay the lions or become lion lunch like the guy before him? Oh, I can barely contain the excitement.

47. For President Barack Obama’s 2012 inauguration, Peepyonce sings the National anthem.

Hey, at least this one didn’t feature Aretha Franklin and her hideous hat. But then again, compared to Aretha Franklin, Beyonce can’t hold a candle to her.

48. Enjoy the outdoors and buy your overpriced clothing and gear at L. L. Peep.

Now this is a great diorama of what you’d see in an L. L. Bean catalog. Of course, though you can personalize stuff from it, the clothes are very expensive or as I call it, “not worth it.”

49. Relive your favorite moments with loveable meth titans Walter White and Jesse Peepman in AMC’s Breaking Buns.

Of course, you might want to clear out of Albuquerque when you see either of these guys and their RV. Also, maybe it’s best not to be a drug lord, even if you can make high quality meth.

50. Rediscover the childhood PTSD induced world of Roald Dahl with this peep diorama of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Of course, they couldn’t show Veruca Salt since she was in the garbage disposal. Nor can they show Mike TeeVee because he suffered from significant shrinkage. Still, Willy Wonka runs a very dangerous and nightmarish place.

Easter Cakes

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 6, 2015

Easter is among a handful of holidays that features cakes and other pastries. My family usually has a bunny cake to celebrate Easter with since there a lot of kids and easy to make. Yet, you also have other motifs such as eggs, chicks, baskets, and flowers. Some may take a more religious motif such as crosses and an empty tomb. Yes, Easter is the time for such cute and colorful confections associated with spring and the resurrection. Now I can go on and on about the lovely professionally made cakes out there. But I know that none of you would be interested since those cakes won’t be worth making fun of. Instead, I’ll compile a post pertaining to some of the great caketastrophes mostly because many of them are unintentionally funny as well as fun to laugh at. Now these cakes are professionally made which you’d find in a store. So for your pleasure, here are some of the great Easter cake blunders that would make Peter Rabbit puke.

1. We begin with the celebration of new life as a chick emerges from its shell.

Okay, I know real chicks aren’t cute and fluffy when just out of the egg. Yet, this one seems to induce nightmares.

2. Of course, you can’t do anything wrong with a basket cake.

Now that’s a real basket case if you ask me. More like a muppet with roses instead of eyes. Of course, he can’t really smell the roses for he’s wearing rose colored glasses. Also, how long did this decorator realize that this cake was upside down?

3. When it comes to whether the chicken or the egg came first, this baker has the answer.

So it was the chicken sperm that came first. Definitely not age appropriate material for an Easter cake, especially in a family setting.

4. For those more religiously inclined, this Easter cross is for you.

You call that a cross? Seriously, how hard is it to mess up on a cross cake. I mean that’s just ungodly hideous for God’s sake.

5. For those who love Easter and Angry Birds, this is the cake for you.

Of course, green pigs might want to stay away from this one. Nevertheless, she’s bringing sexy quack.

6. Now we get to bunny cakes, hope nothing can go wrong with that.

Spiked whiskers? That’s just freaky. Seriously, couldn’t they use a different kind of icing for that?

7. Happy Easter from the chick with the chipmunk cheeks.

And from what I can tell, he seems quite amazed by all the food in his midst. Oh, I forgot, he is food.

8. Once upon a time, a group of bunny rabbits found a field filled with the most enormous carrots.

Unfortunately, the field was located near the Waltz Mill Westinghouse nuclear power plant which experienced a major meltdown during the 1970s. Let’s just say it really messed up a lot of rabbit genetics and leave it at that.

9. Happy Easter from Angry Big Bird.

Sorry, kids, but you’ve come at a really bad time to ask Big Bird on how to get to Sesame Street. Seriously, you don’t want to see him when he’s angry.

10. Nothing says Easter like a field of giant carrots rising up and eating all the bunnies.

Seriously, since when did anyone think of cupcakes depicting bunny eating carrots would be great for Easter? I mean was this decorator on drugs?

11. Happy Easter from the Snidely Whiplash bunny with twist ties on its neck.

I’d really hate to see what this bunny is up to. Seems like it wants to tie somebody on the railroad tracks while in sight of an oncoming train.

12. Rejoice and be glad! For He has risen! Or not.

Since when is an RIP tombstone an appropriate motif for an Easter cake. I mean those who know about Jesus know his tomb resembled a small cave, not something you’d see in a cemetery.

13. This little chick must watch out or else be Pac-Man’s supper.

Okay, I know this is supposed to be a cake depicting a chick hatching from an egg. Yet, this more or less looks like a decorated Pac Man gone rogue for some reason.

14. Of course, you can’t go wrong with a lamb cake this Easter Season.

Yet, this one somehow manages to get impaled with an American flag. How adorable! Not. I’d hate to see the national implications there.

15. Of course, while lambs are seen as tranquil and innocent animals, this isn’t always the case.

Apparently, this lamb saw other lambs smoking and thought it was cool. Of course, little did it know it would lead to lungs filled with tar, on the other hand.

16. Of course, if you don’t like animals, then Easter egg cakes are a viable choice.

Then again, perhaps Easter isn’t the time of year that calls for cakes with subliminal imagery, especially for events with kids around. They may not understand.

17. Happy Easter and all bow down to the dreaded Easter Bunny holding the sacred carrots.

Abandon all hope for ye who enter here. Boy, I think someone might want to call the Bunny exorcist here because this rabbit seems possessed.

18. Seems like the Easter Bunny needs to trim his claws before he scares the children away.

Recounting the rabbit’s face, this won’t happen anytime soon. Also needs to do something about that hump.

19. Happy Easter from the bunny who wants to hop in and bite your face off.

Yes, this rabbit seems like the kind to give you nightmares. You might want to have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in handy, just in case.

20. Happy Easter from the newly hatched chick from an Easter egg.

Reminds me of what the Genie said in Aladdin, “PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWERS!! Itty bitty living space.” Also, don’t like the look on that chick’s face.

21. Evil Easter Bunny bestows his greetings. So hop to it or else.

I don’t know about you, but perhaps using jelly beans for facial features may not be a good idea. Seriously, this bunny looks more like a hare out of Hell.

22. I’m sure an Easter bunny cookie cake would make a great dessert for the whole family.

I don’t know about you but there’s something odd about that bunny that greatly disturbs me. Perhaps it’s rising to the occasion or bursting forth with glorious song if you know what I mean.

23. Happy Easter courtesy of the Incredible Hulk Chick.

Seems like the gamma rays really spread to the barnyard variety have they? Nevertheless, the only way you can tell it’s supposed to be the chick is due to the plastic.

24. Nothing commemorates Jesus’ resurrection like splattery tie dye and carrots on the cross.

Well, a tie dye resurrection cake could be all rights when it pertains to a theatrical celebration of Jesus Christ: Superstar. As with the carrots, well, they’re not cruciferous vegetables.

25. Easter egg or a slice of giant old pepperoni?

Well, it’s hard to say but judging by how the dotted orange egg isn’t a great oval, I’d go with the old pepperoni.

26. Of course, when it comes to eggs, their simple oval shape shouldn’t be difficult to depict on a cake.

Wait a minute. That’s no Easter egg. That’s an Easter themed Christmas tree. Seriously, apparently who ever made this cake doesn’t seem to understand basic geometry.

27. We all know that the Easter Bunny delivers eggs to children at Easter but did you know he also has his own carrot car?

Then again, this might not be a great artistic rendition. Also, why does the Easter Bunny have a mustache in this and carries an expression as if he’s been in an accident?

28. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you, Electro Egg.

Yes, this is Electro Egg. And by the look of his face, someone is bound for a shocker, literally.

29. Happy Easter from the cutest yellow chick from your nightmares!

Now the more you look at this chick the creepier it looks for some reason. Seriously, it’s freaking me out right now.

30. This cake depicts a chick because we all know it’s one of the few Easter animals that say, “Peep Peep.”

Yet, from how I see it, it seems like a freakish yellow seahorse to me. Or possibly a weird banana with eyes or a swan. Then again, it may well be an alien from outer space for all we know.

31. Happy Easter from the -wait a minute are those, boobs? What happened to its arms then?

Now I know that the decorator intended those to be arms. Yet, when you look at it, you have to wonder whether such confection is appropriate for children.

32. Behold, all hail our Cute Overlord, Moldy Puffs Pickle-Ears.

Is it just me or do green Easter Bunny cakes just seem disgusting to you? Well, it does to me and I don’t think this bunny’s thoughts are all that innocent.

33. Nothing says Easter than a cake with a volcano design.

Hate to imagine what that bunny is doing to that egg. Nevertheless, why use a volcano cake for Easter? Oh, it’s supposed to be an egg, but I’m not sure if I can believe that.

34. May I present to you the Easter, what the hell is this?

Now I know this is supposed to be an Easter cake since it contains spring motifs like bunnies and flowers. Yet, I don’t know if I can tell whether this is a stool or a Shinto shrine.

35. Nothing says Easter like a chick who can’t quite get out of its Easter egg.

Apparently, this decorator should’ve just stuck with the egg and left it at that. Having a chick come out of it is all the more disturbing for some reason.

36. Happy Easter from your beloved Easter Bunny from Hell!

Seems like this cake decorator had some traumatic encounter with a costumed Easter Bunny as a kid at the mall. Totally understandable but this doesn’t stop such image from haunting children’s dreams.

37. Though we all know that Easter commemorates Jesus’ resurrection, but did you know that there were two bunnies holding eggs near the cross during his crucifixion?

Yes, I know the Cross is a popular Easter motif as well as bunnies and eggs. But just because some symbols may belong on the same holiday doesn’t mean they go together. I mean there’s a reason why we don’t include Santa in the nativity scene on Christmas for God’s sake.

38. While Lambs are supposed to be sweet and innocent, this lamb is a whole different story.

Yes, this lamb may be young and spring born. But it seems to have murder on the mind and is probably the black sheep of the family in a metaphorical sense.

39. Nothing says Easter than a cake depicting a rabbit from a science experiment gone bad.

Okay, this cake was decorated by a person who A. has never seen a rabbit, B. is on drugs, C. was influenced by drawings of Dr. Seuss or other weird illustrators, or D. all of the above.

40. I now give you, Bunny Bugs.

I’m not sure why the decorator thought such concept was a good idea. They just look like pink worms with bunny heads. Disgusting.

41. Since Jesus is the Lamb of God, then it’s only fitting to have a lamb on the cross.

Now how in the hell is that a cross? If not, then what the hell is it? Then again, it reminds me of something but I’m not sure if this is the kind of post to disclose it.

42. Nothing says Easter like, cookies of gingerbread men?

Of course, Easter does revolve around the themes of resurrection and new life so it’s only fitting. The gingerbread men represent the decaying corpses on the ground while the carrot and rabbit symbolize the new life coming out from them.

43. You can’t celebrate Easter without a cake of the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog.

Sure it may seem like a harmless bunny but as Tim the Enchanter said, “That’s no ordinary rabbit! That’s the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!” Make sure you have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in handy.

44. Nothing says Easter like a cake depicting a cross of green.

Oh, my bad, that’s Saint Patrick’s Day. Of course, while the Saint Paddy’s motifs are obvious, it apparently didn’t sell by March 17. So it’s marketed as an Easter cake instead.

45. Of course, you can’t have Easter without a cake depicting a rabbit’s posterior in its natural habitat.

Let’s just say, I don’t understand the appeal of butt cakes and never will. Still, where’s the rest of the rabbit for God’s sake?

Hippity, Hoppity, Sketchy Easter Bunnies on Their Way

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 5, 2015

Okay, Easter isn’t quite like Christmas or anywhere close. I mean Easter revolves around bunnies and eggs as well as celebrates Jesus’ resurrection. Sure there are gifts in baskets as well as candy but it’s nothing compared to Christmas. But this doesn’t stop some people from trying to make it like a spring version of the winter yuletide holiday. And instead of a white bearded guy in a red suit, you have the Easter Bunny who’s depicted as someone wearing a bunny costume like you’d see at a furry convention. In fact, a costumed Easter Bunny is probably a furry underneath those over-sized rabbit ears and cotton tail. However, though rabbits are adorable animals, there’s nothing cute about an adult wearing an animal costume, no matter how adorable the animal is in question. But this doesn’t stop parents from having their kids pose with these costumed monstrosities, sometimes compelling children to wish they could sit on the creepy mall Santa’s lap. In this post, you will see some of the most terrifying Easter Bunnies imaginable which have incite terrors into children more than the one from Donnie Darko or the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog (well, I’m not sure about that but it managed to scare off a bunch of knights from Monty Python and the Holy Grail). So for your reading pleasure, here is an assortment of Easter Bunnies who might be more terrifying than a crucified man since such costumed bunnies are walking, talking nightmares of soul scarring horror. Some material may not be safe for work.

1. “Could you take this child, please? I’m late for a bank robbery.”

This little girl doesn’t look too happy here. Of course, if I were her, I’d probably feel the same way.

2. These eyes are empty and only reveal that this rabbit has no soul.

I know this is supposed to be a bunny. But it also seems like it’s from a different world or in another dimension. Yet, it seems to have murder on the mind. That little girl better watch it.

3. “Mommy, get me off him! He wants to eat me!”

Painfully this little girl cries like there’s no tomorrow as this Easter Bunny is already looking for his next victim. Those blue eyes only desire the sweet blood of children.

4. What are you waiting for, girl? You have roller blades and joint pads so go before the giant long furry Peter Cottontail tries to get you! Your life depends on it.

I don’t like the look on that bunny’s face. You can already tell he’s at that roller skating rink eying at the small, slow ones.

5. Sometimes people have their pets pose with the Easter Bunny instead of their children.

Those are actually just whiskers. His mouth is the part that’s salivating over the dog he’s about to swallow whole. I don’t want to think about it. Seems like PETA will never hear the end of it.

6. “If you want me to deliver your Easter basket, I’ll need that alarm code.”

Little girl, run away and never return. Seriously, that bunny’s nothing but bad news from the look in his eyes that bear no trace of kindness to any living creature.

7. “We’re going to have a lot of fun together.” (followed by evil maniacal laugh).

Seems like the rabbit is thinking, “I didn’t know they came in chocolate varieties. Looks delicious.” Sorry, NAACP, I was just trying to say it from the rabbit’s point of view.

8. “What do you know? A double pack.”

Man, this bunny sure seems happy but not in a good way. Don’t want to be those girls on his lap.

9. “Have you ever seen the inside of a windowless van?”

This girl sitting on his lap doesn’t seem to be crying. Either she’s very brave or really has no idea of what that bunny has in store for her.

10. “Mommy, no! Please, come back, Mommy! I’ll be good, I promise! Anything but the Easter Bunny, please!”

Behold, the expressionless face of an unrepentent monster. Seriously,spare him his life from this monstrosity!

11. Behold, the ferocious bunny slasher! It’s prey: children, sweet innocent children.

Even by Easter Bunny standards, those eyes are demonic. No wonder he spends most of this time hidden among the bushes, waiting for some unsuspecting kid to drop by. Also, is that blood?

12. This lovely lady bunny from Crayola seems to be pulling off the crying Tammy Faye Bakker look with her eyelashes. Her lashes are so lush they turn the whole eye black.

And, yes, it seems like this lady bunny appears to have the makings of either a makeup contract or a slasher horror movie in which she plays the one killing everyone.

13. “Prisoner 49581, please submit yourself to The Bunny. Prisoner 49581 to The Bunny.”

Hey, it could be worse, kid, at least you’re way too young to be eligible for the Hunger Games. Even so, I have a bad feeling about this situation.

14. As if Easter Bunnies look scary enough with kids, they even look creepier alone.

“Welcome to my humble abode, would you like some of my carrot and children stew? Got the recipe from a cookbook by one Dr. Hannibal Lecter.”

15. “After I give them their eggs, I am taking them back to my planet with me.”

After this photo was taken Eric and Dylan Pasternak were never seen again. We’re not sure of what happened to them or whether they’re still alive.

16. Some parents may make their kids have a picture with the Easter Bunny. Then there are some defying them because they can smell terror.

Run, girl, run for your life. Save yourself while you still can. We all know him giving out eggs with candy in them is just an act.

Run, girl, run for your life. Save yourself while you still can. We all know him giving out eggs with candy in them is just a way to lure children. Of course, he might just be giving her a head start. Some Easter Bunnies just love the sport of the hunt.

17. Of course, we all don’t know what happened to the Kray boys but according to this picture, it seems that he started to nibble on them when someone took this photo.

Lord knows whether these boys’ parents are haunted by their screams of, “Don’t eat me! Don’t eat me!” The horror, the horror.

18. “The child is one of us now.”

And after that, little Timmy was never seen again. His parents are still looking for him to this day but they’re beyond all hope finding him.

19. “Mmmmm….this little girl’s hand just tastes scrumptious. I wonder what the rest of her tastes like.”

I have a bad feeling about this situation. I’m sure little Susie is spending a lifetime in therapy by now, if she ever survived. If she did, not sure about the hand.

20. Before Chuck E. Cheese was a mouse, he was a rabbit. Yet, the kids just didn’t seem to warm up to him as a bunny for some reason.

Yeah, I have to agree. As much as I think the animatronic Chuck E. Cheese and all his friends are, they’re not nearly as terrifying as this guy.

21. “I love babies. Love how they’re so innocent and helpless, which makes them easy prey.”

Baby Ava’s parents should just scoop her up quick or else, she might end up as Peter Cottontail’s next meal by the looks of it.

22. “So which one of you bitches is coming back to my place tonight?”

While some Easter Bunnies are after the innocent blood of the children, others are just plain perverts who want young women to show them their tits.

23. “I have you now, my pretties.”

This Easter Bunny seems so happy but not in a good way. Seems to enjoy the smell of sweet innocents in the morning.

24. Little did Sally and Andy know that there was a giant pink monster behind them.

Maybe it’s best to leave the two blissfully unaware of the pink monster gaining up on them. And I certainly don’t like the look in his eyes.

25. Easter Bunny or horror movie monster?

I know it’s supposed to be a rabbit but it seems that this Easter Bunny seems A. on meth, B. has a day job as a franchise horror movie villain, C. has had his Easter Bunny costume made by someone who thinks he’s some burned out rabbit drug fiend, or D. all of the above.

26. “Note to self: perhaps mixing alfalfa with the gin and tonic is probably not a good idea.”

Yeah, that bunny seems to have ventured too far into the pot patch by the looks of it. Either that, or she seems as if she’s had a few too many.

27. “Mmmm…I seem to have an acquired taste for little girls. So tasty.”

Tragically, Little Jessica was never seen again after this. Her parents are still looking for her and have started working to keep Easter Bunnies out of playgrounds.

28. “Come and play with me, little girl.”

I don’t like the look on that bunny’s face. I mean it’s just as if he wants to have her for dinner in the Donner Party sense. Seems like this little girl doesn’t know what she’s up against.

29. Man, this girl must be very brave to keep a straight face while on that Easter Bunny’s lap.

In the words of Tim the Enchanter, “Death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth…” Also, don’t like the hand placement by the looks of it.

30. Before he had a successful career in movies and played Nucky Thompson in the Emmy-Award winning HBO series Boardwalk Empire, Steve Buscemi would occasionally fill in as an Easter Bunny ast the mall.

Of course, this was how he was discovered by the Coen Brothers who cast him as a villain in several of their films from the 1990s.

31. May I introduce you to the Easter Bunny and his friend Butch. At least I think it’s his friend. Please, be his friend.

“Time for our 12 o’clock paddy cake, tiger.” For those who’ve seen Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, you might know what I’m implying.

32. “Okay, kids, remember what I showed you about how to open a locked car without a key.”

Man, I don’t know about you but this Easter Bunny seems like a very bad role model by the looks of it. Please don’t trust him with your kids.

33. Don’t look now, but I think the bunny has just grabbed some unsuspecting kid.

Seriously, that boy must be on something since nobody smiles when a giant ferocious Easter Bunny puts their arms around them before dragging them to their untimely deaths.

34. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you the Velveteen Rabbit, from Hell!

Man, and you thought today's costumed Easter Bunnies were horrifying. I mean just look at its souless eyes and long gnashing teeth.

Man, and you thought today’s costumed Easter Bunnies were horrifying. I mean just look at its soulless eyes and long gnashing teeth.

35. Allow me to introduce to you the Easter Bunny and his penguin pal.

I can bet this boy is wetting his pants as we speak. And from the looks of it, I can’t decide which one I’d rather sit on for they’re both equally nightmare inducing.

36. Little does this little boy know about the bespeckled horror behind him.

Mall security, I think we may need a higher and fuller fence. Else, risk a full frontal assault because that rabbit’s dynamite.

37. Of course, delivering eggs to all those kids is exhausting work.

Man, and you thought the Easter Bunny is supposed to be a good role model for children. Don’t let those kids catch you with those cigarettes and booze.

38. When not traumatizing kids at the mall, they are hanging out at the Easter office party.

Man, this bunny is just creepy as hell. Bet the woman is just smiling because she’s being promised a raise. Yet, this one is guaranteed to devour your soul if you don’t get back to work.

39. Behold, nobody is safe from the attack of Peter Rabbit.

And it seems that this Peter Rabbit seems to find nourishment in the tears of sweet innocent children. Oh, the humanity!

40. Easter Bunny or slasher horror movie villain?

Man, had no idea that homemade paper masks can be so terrifying, especially for a rabbit costume. I wonder what became of those kids.

41. “I think her liver will go just fine with some fava beans and a fine Chianti.”

This girl on the Bunny’s lap is taking this photo op quite well. Yet, this Flopsy seems to have murder on the mind.

42. Behold, well dressed chocolate bunny on the street.

Okay, not only is this chocolate bunny seems like a substitute teacher from your nightmares, it’s actually quite offensive if you see that it’s a white guy without makeup, especially without the bunny ears.

43. “If you don’t give me your Social Security number, the number on your bank account and credit cards, and your home alarm code, then you might as well kiss your precious children goodbye.”

Of course, this is the kind of picture you’d send along with a ransom note. Still, this bunny’s eyes bear no soul at all.

44. I’m sure having an Easter Bunny dressed as a granny won’t traumatize the kiddies a bit.

Ooops, I was wrong. Still enough to give this little boy nightmares who seems resigned to his inevitable fate at the moment.

45. Easter Bunny or mascot for a fiberglass insulation company?

Of course, I’m not sure if that makes any difference for it seems like this creature seems too cute for a haunted house and too creepy for anything else.

46. “I just love it when they scream.”

Because nothing replenishes an Easter Bunny like screams of horror from innocent helpless children.

47. When the Easter Bunny grabbed her basket, suddenly egg hunting didn’t seem like a great idea for little Abigail.

Yeah, I wouldn’t want to go egg hunting with this Easter Bunny either, especially one that’s likely to appear in children’s nightmares.

48. “You can have her, just please stop looking at us like that.“

I’d hate to know what this nefariously pink Peter Cottontail has on his mind. Oh, yes, he’s pure evil as you can see in his eyes.

49. Hmm…seems like this Easter Bunny really doesn’t know how to behave during a beauty pageant photo-op.

And the fact he’s looking down on a beauty queen who’s at least a pre-teen makes this picture all the more cringe worthy.

50. I can’t tell whether this bunny is dead or just resting.

Did it just die? Get the kid, he’s on a dead bunny! Of course, I also don’t like how this bunny has his arm on the boy in this picture. Seriously, why?

51. Now that’s now bunny. That’s a giant white sentient peep.

And as a peep, his insides just consist of a concoction of inedible marshmallow and sugar filled with straight up maliciousness.

52. Either this boy is sitting on the Easter Bunny’s lap or this is a still from a lost Twilight Zone episode that depicted a giant, raging, rabbit psychokiller that preys especially on children.

Either way, this poor boy will have to spend a lifetime of therapy sessions, if he ever survived his encounter. Seriously, that bunny is just horrifying beyond all reason.

53. Either this Easter Bunny is trying to eat the dog or possibly commit unspeakable acts with it.

Either way, I really don’t want to know. Someone please call animal control and remove this creepy rabbit from the premises.

54. Unable to wriggle free, the child grimly accepts his fate.

Man, this lady bunny seems to have used way too much eyeliner for some reason. Seriously, that’s not cute. That’s nightmare inducing terror.

55. “Don’t cry running from me, little girl. You parents haven’t paid the ransom yet.”

Since when does an “abduction motif” make for a memorable Easter photo? This is utterly fucked up beyond all imagination? Seriously, why?

56. Of course, if it weren’t for the drug charges, Cottontail would still be taking photo ops with children instead of dogs.

“Dude, I can totally go for some of those leafy vegetables in Mr. MacGregor’s rad basement right now. Of course, eating them makes me so hungry and tripping balls.”

57. Of course, Larry decided to work as an Easter Bunny after he accidentally bleached his Bigfoot costume.

Yeah, that totally looks like a white rabbit. Well, the ears at least. Not sure about the rest of him. Seems more like a monster you’d have if the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland mated with Chewbacca.

58. “Hey, kid, touch my carrot, will you?”

Due to the unfortunate carrot placement and the creepy look on that bunny’s face, then no, kid. Absolutely not. Just run away like hell, kid. Seriously, you don’t want to know what this bunny is up to.

59. Don’t look now, but I don’t think this bunny is doing anything lawful on the premises.

If you see an Easter Bunny that looks like this on your lawn, you might want to call the cops in your area. Seriously, do it before he steals something like your car keys.

60. “Mind if I cut in, ladies?”

Sure these women may be smiling but there’s something not right about this bunny’s facial expression. I mean he just seems to have a face of someone subject to a sexual harassment lawsuit.

61. Of course, it isn’t uncommon for some Easter Bunnies to visit retirement homes.

Now this old lady is like, “Back off, boy, or I’ll put you in a world by running over you with my walker. Kepeche?”

62. “I am the easter bunny dammit, respect me or I eat the child.”

And looking at his evil, soulless, eyes, I don’t think he’s kidding. And I’m not sure if this boy is aware of what’s going on.

63. What’s odd about this Easter Bunny is that he doesn’t seem too fond of children.

“God dammit, I only did this for the money! If I have to see one more kid sit on my lap, then I’m not sure what I’ll do. Now where my Jack Daniels and 10 cent hooker they promised me?”

64.By the look of his eyes, this rabbit definitely has a nose candy problem.

Okay, I think this rabbit is just plain terrifying. By the way, despite the kid having a butch haircut, that's definitely a girl because little boys didn't wear puffy sleeves like that in the day.

Okay, I think this rabbit is just plain terrifying, especially where he has his hands. By the way, despite the kid having a butch haircut, that’s definitely a girl because little boys didn’t wear puffy sleeves like that in the day.

65. By the looks of it, you’d think the Easter Bunny was plotting to kill Superman.

Of course, what makes this even more cringe worthy is that George Reeves actually died of a gunshot wound under some mysterious circumstances. But I’m surprised why the Easter Bunny was never a murder suspect.

66. “I give you eggs and candy in your Easter basket, you give me booze. Do we have deal?”

Looking at the bunny’s face, you can tell he has a serious drinking problem. Maybe he should lay off on the mint juleps for awhile.

67. “I’ve got plans for you, Goldilocks.”

“That’s right, be a good little girl and eat these carrots. Else, you’ll make a lovely addition in my rabbit stew and I’m sure you don’t want that to happen.”

68. Okay, maybe this whole inter-species romance thing isn’t a great idea, especially if one of them is a giant 6 foot rabbit.

While Roger and Jessica Rabbit might make a cute couple, understand that they’re cartoons. Such Rabbit and human relations in real life would be quite terrifying according to this. I mean, rabbits were never meant to be sexy.

69. Easter Bunny or old timey villain with a double mustache?

Yeah, I’m sure this bunny doesn’t seem like he could go on homicidal warpath and kill a bunch of teenagers. Yeah right.

70. Dr. Moreau Pig/Bunny Atrocity Mask? Check! Costume on backwards? Check! Suspect location? Check! Happy Easter.

Yeah, wearing a bunny costume backwards really doesn’t make this bunny less scary. Of course, the mask really inspires a slew of eternal nightmares.

71. Of course, since pink is a festive Easter color, maybe pink bunnies aren’t so bad.

I was wrong since this one completely scares the bejesus out of anyone who dares looks into her soulless eyes. Also, I bet the boy probably needs some brown pants by now.

72. “Go, ahead, kid touch the carrot, will you?”

Oh, hell, no. Please don’t, kid. Just don’t. I have a bad feeling about this. Seriously, those eyes bear no sense of kindness whatsoever.

73. “Oh, yes, little one, come to me. You will be assimilated.”

Okay, I know this is supposed to depict a sweet, heartwarming moment. But I just can’t help but cringe when looking at this. Seriously, that bunny is terrifying.

74. I’m not sure this girl should reach into that Easter basket. Must be desperate for Easter goodies.

Seems like she was a bit desperate. Of course, this is how an Easter Bunny like that would try to ensnare its prey. Yeah, that girl may never be seen again anytime soon.

75. Now that looks like a cross between the Easter Bunny and the Abominable Snowman.

Now if it weren’t for the long ears, I would’ve sworn it was some kind of homicidal monster from a children’s cartoon of some sort.

76. They say if you can look into his eyes, you can see the fiery depths of Hell itself.

Either that, or it resembles the Trix Rabbit after he stopped craving cereal and started abusing psychoactive and hallucinogenic drugs like meth, for instance.

77. For children who prefer their six-foot rabbits more nightmarishly realistic.

Of course, this child is probably going to experience a lifetime of giant bunny nightmares. Yet, I’m not sure whether this one laughs maniacally or not.

78. Of course, many people say that 2 Easter Bunnies are better than one.

Okay, I’m sorry. I was wrong. They’re actually quite terrifying. And I’m sure that there’s no escape for screaming baby Julie on the lady bunny’s laugh. Of course, I could see these two laughing maniacally on the whole thing.

79. “The child is mine. All mine. Nah hah hah hah hah.”

I guess this child is beyond hope when it comes to getting away from arms of the fluffy pink and white monstrosity.

80. When not having kids sit on his lap, this Easter Bunny likes to hang out at the club.

I’m not sure why he’s a hit with the ladies because that evil, soulless face is more appropriate for a horror movie. Seriously, I really don’t like the looks of him.

Easter Greetings from the Days of Yesteryear

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 3, 2015

While not a big card exchange holiday like Christmas and Valentine’s Day as well as perhaps Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, there are some people who take part of this tradition which was started in the 19th century. Many of these cards contain a variety of Easter motifs like bunnies, chicks, eggs, crosses, and what not. Of course, as with anything from more than a generation ago, Easter cards also may have a tendency to receive their share of nostalgia since many of them have artistic illustrations attached to them. Now I can go on all about the great vintage Easter greeting cards out there. But I know that would be boring so I’ll show you some Easter cards that would make us ask what the hell our ancestors were thinking or how did they ever think it was a good idea. Some of them might seem creepy by our standards as well as unintentionally funny. So maybe a vintage Easter card of Jesus as a shepherd is probably a better card to send, even if your friends aren’t Christian, compared to this bunch. So without further ado, here are some not so cutesy Easter cards from yesterday.

1. Happy Easter from the hatching Easter baby.

And this is why we need biology class as well as sex education in schools. Seriously, mammals are placental animals that don’t lay eggs.

2. Loving Easter Greetings, now watch what those chicks can do with that rabbit.

Man, it must suck being a rabbit in a chick circus. Seriously, nobody wants to get pussy willow whipped under the big top.

3. Easter greetings from an unhinged rabbit performance of Wuthering Heights performed from within giant egg.

Honestly, I really don’t want to know what’s going on there. And for those who know the story of Wuthering Heights, remember Cathy and Heathcliff’s screaming dysfunctional relationship doesn’t end well.

4. Happy Easter from some creepy woman in egg holding an egg.

I wonder what kind of drugs these French photographers and card designers were on to produce such crazy cards like these. Maybe absinthe isn’t as safe as it’s said to be.

5. Happy Easter from the two cats who decided to paint a hatching egg.

“Sure the egg might’ve hatched while we were painting it, Joey. But look on the bright side, at least we’re having baby rotisserie chicken tonight.”

6. Happy Easter from a German soldier, an Austro-Hungarian infantryman, and the Easter Bunny?

Man, seeing the Easter Bunny hanging out the the Central Powers. Let’s hope Santa Claus is on the Allies’ side or else a bunch a soldiers are sure going to be disappointed.

7. Easter greetings from the colorful, egg shell wearing, dancing bunny cult.

Who knew that old fashioned card artists could make bunnies and eggs so terrifying. Could possibly serve as an inspiration for a Donnie Darko poster.

8. “Okay, Henny Penny, I spared your last chick now repay me by laying your next egg in the frying pan. Breakfast doesn’t cook itself, you know.”

In the world of vintage cards, this is “breakfast.” In the world of poultry, this is Sophie’s Choice.

9. Happy Easter this spring from the Easter Puck.

While the Prince of Darkness may inhabit the fiery regions of Hell, he sure does enjoy frolicking among the white daffodils during the spring. Still, don’t want to see this during the Easter egg hunt.

10. Nothing says Easter like a visit from the ghost dad who went to fight on the Western Front.

Hmm…German soldier dad with Kaiser helmet watching over Easter Bunny with his children. Creepy.

11. Happy Easter from the egg carrying, umbrella wielding chicken lady.

Okay, that’s going to give your kid nightmares. Of course, she’s about to whack that bunny with her umbrella over the abduction of one of her unborn children.

12. Happy Easter from the chick preying bunny from Hell!

I hate to think what this evil eyed Easter bunny wants to do with this chick. Seems like he’s saying, “I have plans for you, Goldilocks.”

13. An Easter greeting from the bunny regiment and their enslaved chicken.

Yes, I’m sure those eggs are from those the enslaved chicken laid which they’re now using as artillery shells. Also, did I tell you that the chicken sort of resembles a rooster?

14. Easter greetings from the egg that inspired Hannibal Lecter.

How could any card company ever think this illustration is a good idea? I mean it has a picture of an anthropomorphic egg having it’s guts eaten out of him.

15. Happy Easter from creepy rabbit girl.

Okay, compared to the Donnie Darko rabbit and this girl in a rabbit costume, the creepy rabbit girl wins every time when it comes to inducing nightmares.

16. “All right, who’s been cracking the eggs in this basket?”

Okay, this card carries some unfortunate implications we need not discuss right now. Of course, those 2 eggs breaking might’ve been an accident but it’s not stopping the chick soldiers from chirping like mad.

17. “So remember kids, babies come from giant chicken eggs, okay?”

Do I need to remind anyone why sex ed is required in high schools across America? Seriously, this is fucked up. I mean what the hell was this designer on when he thought up this?

18. “By the way, Jimmy, this is a hard egg to crack so we must use hammers.”

Still, I wonder where these girls got their chicken costumes from. Oh, I think I can guess. Oh, my God, that’s disturbing! And there the yellow chick sits helplessly by to watch.

19. “Get off my lawn, you floppy eared, patted food, egg stealing punk, Peter Cottontail!”

Also serves as a great PSA on why we need stricter gun laws. Yep, nothing says Easter like a chick using his God given Second Amendment Right of standing his ground.

20. Apparently, Easter isn’t always welcome in places like the swamp since the frogs and the bees are total bullies.

By the way, are the frogs flinging mud or poo? I can’t really be sure. Besides, bees aren’t that big unless they’ve been exposed to radiation, perhaps, but I don’t want to think about it.

21. “Happy Easter, and remove the ladder please.”

Unfortunately, Billy would drown in an array of egg white and yoke as well as willful negligence from his friends.

22. Happy Easter with love from the office chick couple.

Seems like someone in the back isn’t happy for these 2 lovebirds and seems like it’s contemplating revenge of some sort.

23. Now these two chicks seem to have a nice Easter morning walk.

Okay, now the guy chick is smoking in a suit. The female chick has a bit of her shell attached to her ass. So does that mean she’s not long hatched and that there’s a bit of sugar daddery going on?

24. “Here, boy, here’s a lovely Easter egg to give to your mother.”

Remember, kids, don’t ever accept Easter eggs from strange rabbits. Seriously, you have no idea what their agenda is. Besides, the kid is creepy.

25. Good wishes, this Easter, unless you’re the chick in the stew pot.

Now this is quite disturbing. Aren’t the other two chicks going to help their friend? Or is the one chick like, “Sorry, but there’s a Breaking Bad marathon on AMC.”

26. Happy Easter by the creepy gnome painting Easter eggs.

Don’t like the look on that guy’s face. Also, I have a bad feeling about the chicks surrounding him who seem fatally attracted to the color red for some reason.

27. “Happy Easter and you can have my Easter eggs if you can pry them from my cold dead hands.”

Would great movie poster. I can see it now. Easter Bunny’s Revenge: It’s rabbit season, folks, but this time it’s man whose the hunted.

28. Happy Easter and all hail the giant newly hatched chick.

Now I’m not sure why these people have to dance around the chick. Must be some sort of cult ritual before they sacrifice it by setting the nest on fire.

29. Easter greetings from the gnome flower house.

“Come in and make yourself at home. Of course, I’m not going steal your eggs or make you into rabbit stew.” I have a bad feeling about this since the gnome is just terrifying.

30. In the latest of baby chicken transportation, I know give you the rabbit and egg shell carrier.

The rabbit seems dead inside. Also, I’m sure egg shells are very fragile and don’t make good containers. Just saying.

31. These rabbits wish you a happy Easter greeting.

And by “greeting,” the mean, “we will kill you. Possibly stuff and mount you while we’re at it.”

32. Happy Easter from the red eyed killer bunnies of infernal doom.

“We’re here to eat your cute little chicks or possibly stun you with our laser eyes.” Either way, these cute little chicks are going to be nuggets once these bunnies are done with them.

33. With best Easter wishes, let’s destroy these multicolored eggs from the nest by dumping them on these birds. It will be fun.

Obviously, whoever illustrated this cared either hated birds or didn’t think this one through. Bunch of brats.

34. Celebrate Easter like these two chickies would, getting drunk.

The one with the bottle is destined to become the famed rooster His Royal Majesty Rex Goliath who would reach a whopping 47 pounds as “the World’s Largest Rooster” and have a wine company named after him in California.

35. “You know these hens don’t just produce great artillery shells. They also are great for transporting cannons.”

Seriously, what’s with all this Easter motifs with battle implements? It’s like having a card with a picture of a commando Easter Bunny in camo carrying an AK-47! I mean, why?

36. On Easter, it’s not uncommon to see upright rabbits playing tennis with colored Easter eggs.

“It’s a good thing these eggs are hard boiled and covered in latex. Else, we’d have a slimy situation on our hands.”

37. Nothing says Easter like a boy putting the moves on a girl in a giant eggshell boat rowed by a rabbit.

I bet this rabbit is like, “Get a room, you two.” Still, how old are these kids supposed to be? I mean this is kind of disturbing if you ask me.

38. Happy Easter from the whole family.

Okay, now let me get this straight. This family consists of a rabbit dad and chick mom with two rabbit boys and a baby chick. So how does that happen? I have nothing against depicting inter-species relationships in greeting cards but this is ridiculous.

39. Remember parents, don’t leave your baby unattended with an egg basket. Because small children can easily fall prey to monstrous chicks.

I don’t like the look of the three chicks congregating like they’re straight out of Goodfellas. Luckily, baby has a pussy willow in hand for self-defense.

40. Didn’t know that the Easter Bunny traveled on a plane made from pink spring flowers.

I wonder what kind of drugs this illustrator was tripping on to come up with this? Seriously, why does this even exist?

41. Happy Easter from the naked lady hatching from the giant egg.

Since how does this capture the message of Easter? Seriously, you wonder that such cards of strange women hatching from eggs exist mainly as fanservice. You know, the kind of cards young men would send to their fellow frat brothers.

42. Happy Easter from the Easter egg girl.

Seriously, I’m at a loss for words with this one. Also, I don’t think that little girl’s dress is appropriate attire either. I mean, why?

43. Easter greetings from the chickies and the boy who’s about to kill their newly hatched friend with a paddle.

I don’t know about you but I think the chicks need to clear out right now because there’s a paddle wielding boy with murder on the mind.

44. Nothing says Easter like a newly hatched babe in the river.

Now this is crazy. And no, gorgeous women don't emerge from eggs! Seriously, why?

Now this is crazy. And no, gorgeous women don’t emerge from eggs! Else, Sports Illustrated and Playboy would’ve started their own egg hatching programs. Seriously, why?

45. Here comes Peter Cottontail, hopping down the bunny trail. Hippity, hoppity, Easter’s on its-Holy shit, is that blood in that bucket?

Seems like Peter Cottontail murdered his boss and is now gleefully painting the town with his blood, literally. What a sadistic, homicidal rabbit.

46. Seems like this chick has taken habit to riding and smoking.

So I suppose this card shows how barnyard chicks really start early. Still, not sure which is freakier, the smoking or the riding habit.

47. This Easter, may you find an Easter Bunny within a colored egg.

Sorry, kids, but I’m afraid rabbit reproduction just doesn’t work that way. Rabbits give birth to live young and don’t emerge fully formed. Yeah, way to go with telling misleading information on rabbit biology. Also, is its ear bleeding?

48. Nothing makes a more adorable Easter card than a child covering a rabbit’s eyes.

Then again, those rabbit eyes seem to tell us that it’s pure evil and might kill us as we speak. The kid looks pretty creepy as well.

49. Nothing brings the spirit of Easter than a card depicting bunnies smoking flowers with pipes.

vintage-Easter-postcard-funny-rabbits-smoking-flowers-egg-pipes_jpg

Now they use egg shells for their pipe ends. Still, that must be strong stuff that their smoking. Also, you have to wonder what the designer was smoking to come up with this idea. Seriously why?

50. May your Easter greetings bring you great joy this spring.

free-vintage-easter-clip-art-pink-egg-three-tabby-kittens

Unfortunately for this chick, once it gets out of its shell, it won’t have a long to live. Because these cats seem to eye it as if they’re waiting for their next meal.

Hop Down the Bunny Trail for These Easter Treats

Posted by historymaniacmegan on March 1, 2015

As most of us now know, Easter doesn’t come until April. But since this is almost halfway through Lent, I might as well get my Easter articles out of the way. Now Easter is a very important day on the Christian calendar since it denotes the resurrection of Jesus Christ after he was crucified, died, and was buried. Yet, as with Christmas, people also add their own touches with this holiday as well such as bunnies, baskets, chicks, sheep, flowers, parades, and colored eggs. Of course, there’s also the Easter Bunny as well as egg hunts and sometimes family gatherings since it’s more of a family holiday. So it’s no surprise that there’s a lot of food associated with it such as ham, bunny cake, and hot crossed buns. Cultures may vary. So without further adieu, I give you an assortment of cute little Easter treats you can’t resist.

1. If you think a bunny cake is too difficult you can always do a bird nest cake.

Now that’s a big nest for so many little pastel peanut M&M eggs. Also, I don’t think you can eat the bird.

2. Bring spring into your life with these adorable chicks cookie macarons.

Not sure of what to think of macarons, yet these yellow chicks are just simply adorable. Seriously, look into their eyes and you just want to eat them up.

3. Make your Easter memorable with these springtime cupcakes.

Now these motifs consist of eggs, baskets, and flowers. Yet some of them have spring designs on them as well.

4. For those who want to eat healthy, you might want to go with an Easter Bunny fruit tray.

Now this cantaloupe bunny is actually quite terrifying if you ask me. Seems like it’s escaped from the bunny insane asylum and is out to kill again.

5. Treat yourself on Easter with an egg salad ham sandwich.

As with “egg” I mean a decorated one inscribed on top of the bread. Now isn’t that festive? Yet I’m not sure whether that’s icing or ketchup and pineapple.

6. For your little bunnies this Easter, I’m sure these carrot patch cupcakes will do quite nicely.

Of course, the carrots may not be real yet they seem like something you’d see right out of some children’s story. Nevertheless, at least they’re chocolate.

7. For your Easter dinner, you can’t do wrong with a veggie egg pizza.

Now this is just perfect which includes purple cauliflower, green onion, yellow peppers, and carrots, a food rabbits are usually seen eating.

8. For those who like Easter bonnets, these cupcakes are for you.

Now these bonnets are quite pretty yet, they’re technically hats since they have brims. Real bonnets don’t.

9. Seems like the Easter Bunny needs to sort out his carrot supply.

And you thought that Bugs Bunny had problems with storage space. Hey, at least Bugs doesn’t have decorated eggs as well.

10. Make your Easter memorable with this Easter bonnet veggie and snack tray.

Wonder how they manage to get the dip like that, I will never know. Yet, I like how they used a carrot peel as a ribbon.

11. If you can’t make an Easter egg veggie pizza, carrot ones may do.

All the toppings here are broccoli and carrots. So this is much simpler to make than the Easter egg one, but much less impressive.

12. What better Easter appetizer to have than chicks popping out of hardboiled eggs?

Of course, these are the kind of treats that may seem quite cute at first but when you think about it, not so much. Seriously, most of the eggs we use come from chickens.

13. If working with Rice Krispies, you can make eggs with M&Ms hidden inside them.

It helps that Rice Krispie treats are just so easy to make and that you don’t have to bake them in the oven. Otherwise, the M&M candies would melt.

14. Nothing makes Easter more worthwhile than bunny buns.

Now these may take time to make but they’re nevertheless adorable beyond compare. They must taste good, too.

15. If Easter bread isn’t available, then bunny bread loaves will do.

Now I’m sure they may not be cute buns but they’re certainly adorable. That is until they actually get sliced and eaten.

16. You simply can’t have Easter unless you have bunny sugar cookies.

Sure they may look like the other rabbit baked goods but they’re so adorable. Just have to love their little eyes and ears.

17. Since the previous bunny fruit tray was quite creepy, here is one your kids will enjoy.

Now this pineapple rabbit is much better even if the fruit choices are much more limited to pineapple, blueberries, strawberries, and kiwi.

18. For your veggie tray, you can’t do wrong with putting a dip tray in a bread bunny.

Now this rabbit might not have its ears sticking out and may prefer celery. But it’s so cute.

19. Of course, no Easter would be complete without a bunny cake.

Now this is how a traditional bunny cake is made. Only takes two cakes and a simple design.

20. Bring spring into your life with these garden cupcakes.

Now the chocolate content is fine. Of course, the flowers aren’t usually planted with the carrots and lettuce.

21. You can also dip Rice Krispies Easter eggs in icing.

You can also decorate them with sprinkles of all types. Not sure if they have candy in them but they’re quite adorable.

22. Bring Easter into your life with these yellow chick cake pops.

Not sure if they’re chocolate on the inside which might not be likely. Yet, these are certainly adorable.

23. If you have Oreos than make them into chicks and lambs.

Of course, this would mean dipping them in icing as well as decorating them. However, they’re still quite adorable.

24. Nothing says Easter like these carrot garden cookie treats.

Of course, this isn’t how people grow carrots where I live. Yet, such garden would be quite messy to reenact with food.

25. To get in the Easter spirit, I’m sure these assorted cupcakes will do quite nicely.

These consist of flowers in grass, pink roses, bunnies, Easter bonnets, and Easter eggs. But they’re so cute enough to eat.

26. Now these Easter bunny rolls are simply delightful.

Now these bunnies are so adorable with their little ears and cotton tail. Hate to see them get eaten though.

27. If you don’t like bunny buns for Easter, then I’m sure duck rolls will do.

Of course, you wouldn’t tell they’re ducks except with their position and almond beaks. But they’re so adorable.

28. For your kids, a bunny sandwich will sure make a fine Easter lunch.

Now this bunny face includes cucumbers, carrots, cherry tomato, egg, onions, and peas. Still, adorable.

29. Since spring brings flowers, these flower cupcakes will do nicely.

They flowers may be made from marshmallows, sugar, and jelly beans. But they sure are pretty.

30. If a bunny cake seems too easy for you this Easter, then you can’t do wrong with an egg cake.

Either this is professionally made or someone must’ve had too much time on their hands. But these chick cupcakes are so adorable.

31. For those who love flowers, these flower basket cupcakes will make your Easter spring.

The best part of these is that they’re chocolate. The flowers are probably made from sugar but they’re so pretty.

32. If you think cupcakes are too complicated, you can always make cookie Easter basket cookies.

Now these consist of vanilla sandwich cookies, Twizzlers, and rainbow Nerds candies. And the best part is, you don’t have to use an oven.

33. For a healthy Easter lunch your kids will love, here is an Easter Bunny sandwich.

Now the ears are made from banana while the sandwich uses 2 types of bread. Nevertheless, this is adorable.

34. Have your kids hop along the bunny trail with this quality Easter lunch.

Seems like this lunch is all bunnied up with a rabbit going down its hole sandwich, a rabbit egg and jello, rabbit cheese crackers, and some carrots in raisin dirt.

35. You can either buy a chocolate bunny for Easter or make one with chocolate Rice Krispies and melted marshmallow.

Of course, with Rice Krispie chocolate bunnies you can select either your own creamy filling or none at all.

36. You can also use Rice Krispies with Nutella to make Easter bird nest treats.

And I see here that this person used peanut M&Ms as eggs since I could recognize the colors for their Easter assortment.

37. If you don’t feel like baking dessert, then perhaps you might go with an Easter egg snack tray.

Now these consist of chocolate rabbit cookies as well as light green, pink, and yellow chocolate covered pretzels on an Easter egg dish.

38. For storing your Easter egg cookies, an egg carton certainly comes in handy.

They may not be as intricate as some of the colored egg cookies you see. But they seem to come in a array of designs in so many colors.

39. For the fruit lover, you can’t do wrong with this Easter egg pizza.

Now this is more of a dessert pizza with fruit toppings to decorate it over pink icing. Nevertheless, it’s quite colorful.

40. Since Christmas has gingerbread houses, it’s only fair we should have cookie houses for Easter.

Now this was probably not made for eating since cookie houses never are. But you have to admire the artistry with the chicks, pretzel windows, and white chocolate pretzel roof.

41. Nothing says Easter like little yellow pretzel chicks.

Who knew that regular pretzels from a grocery store could be just the right shape to make cute little chickies out of them? Then again, they may not be the exact shape, but close.

42. While we’re at it, you can also use pretzels to make pretty flowers with chocolate and M&Ms.

But make sure you use the peanut M&Ms for centers and the regular M&Ms for petals. Nevertheless, quite ingenious.

43. For Easter appetizers, you can’t go wrong with deviled bunny eggs.

Hey, at least these aren’t meant to look like chicks, which was quite disturbing. Also, quite cute.

44. If you like bread sticks, it’s only fitting to have them resemble carrots.

You can also add parsley for the leafy ends. But other than their breaded texture, they almost look like the real thing.

45. For your Easter lunch, your kids will certainly love this hatching chick sandwich.

Not surprisingly, this chick is made from a slice of American cheese. And its eggshell is derived from bread.

46. For those who like brigadeiros, here are some of the Easter egg variety.

Now a brigadeiro is a simple Brazilian chocolate bonbon created in the 1940s. Yet, when you make them as Easter eggs, you can go all out with the decorating.

47. If you don’t like Rice Krispies, may I suggest Fruity Pebbles treats would do just as fine for colored eggs.

Of course, you might remember the Fruity Pebbles shamrock treats from my last post for Saint Patrick’s Day delectables. Nevertheless, why the Flinstones celebrate Easter and Christmas when it makes no sense, I don’t have the slightest idea.

48. Of course, for Easter you can make your hardboiled deviled eggs an array of different colors.

Of course, you might want to make sure they aren’t the Easter eggs you dyed and intend to use for decoration. Because that could upset the kids.

49. For your kid’s lunch, you might want to send them with an Easter Bunny ham and cheese sandwich.

Now the rabbit is made from cheese and sitting on the grass. But if you must have your kid eat this during Lent or Holy Week, make sure you don’t put it in their lunch on Fridays.

50. This chocolate bunny is carrying an egg in the fast lane.

Now this is professionally made but it’s worth showing on this post. Nevertheless, if he goes any faster, the egg might be scrambled.

51. If you like cookies and jelly beans, then this large Easter egg cookie is for you.

Now I’m no fan of jelly beans and think they taste disgusting (even if they aren’t from Bertie Bots). But this seems to have a rather elaborate design thanks to such candies and icing.

52. Now these loveable marshmallow bunnies will hop right into your heart.

Of course, these are actually quite easy to make with marshmallows, icing, and sprinkles. Yet, be careful where you place the eyes.

53. Bring flower power to your Easter with these beautiful flower cupcakes.

Like the other flower cupcakes, they’re also decorated with icing, marshmallows, and sugar. But they also seem to have a fancier disposition.

54. For your dessert centerpiece, you might want to go with an Easter cookie bouquet.

Contains a hatching chick, 5 flowers, and 3 crosses. And all are decorated in each unique way. Some people seem to have too much time on their hands.

55. Bring spring into this Easter with an ice cream flower garden patch.

Sure this may look pretty but I think coconut grass and gum drops are disgusting. Also, I wonder what pastry the fencing is made from.

56. If chicks, Easter eggs, or bunnies aren’t your thing, then may I suggest a lamb cake instead.

Now this one is professionally made according to the detail. But the homemade one I found on Google Images was creepier.

57. When it comes to making Easter egg pastries, some people think bigger is better.

Now this is professionally made and something I wouldn’t recommend to anybody. But I put it on my post anyway since it’s an Easter treat you can’t miss.

58. For those with marshmallow peeps, you can’t do wrong with making a peep cake.

Then again, since marshmallow peeps are inedible by design, I think you should just place them in dioramas. Much more entertaining that way.

59. Give your fruit kabobs an Easter touch with your marshmallow peeps.

Now it seems to me that the peeps were only added to make these fruit sticks more Easter friendly. Otherwise, I’m not sure if they have any taste beyond sugar.

60. For your Easter dessert platter, you can’t do wrong with these egg cake pops.

Even better, you can make them all kinds of colors, decorate them, and put them into a bouquet centerpiece.

61. Why waste money on a chocolate bunny while you can make your own peanut butter fudge bunnies?

However, they seem to be just little chocolate fur balls with rabbit ears and feet. But that’s beside the point so use your imagination.

62. You can also use your Rice Krispies and melted marshmallows to make Easter baskets for M&Ms.

Sure food coloring may be involved here, but aren’t pastel colors for Easter kind of the point? Also, rather have M&Ms than jelly beans.

63. If you like flower cupcakes but don’t like sugar covered marshmallows, you can always use icing.

Yes, they may look like daisies with the yellow centers. But daisies are much easier flowers to draw than say, roses, which are very complicated.

64. For those who like bird’s nests, you might want to use some peeps as the birds.

Now these look cute but I’m not sure if I want to take out the peeps first before eating the nests, especially if the eggs are jelly beans.

65. For those who want to make an Easter Bunny cake but are more ambitions, you might want to go with this.

Now this might be a tad too realistic in regards to the Easter Bunny, but it’s quite cute. Not sure where its cotton tail is though. But like the carrot.

66. Chocolate eggs can come in many different sizes and colors as well as are easy to customize.

Sure bunnies and chicks are great Easter motifs. But my favorites of these have to be Mr. and Mrs. Potatohead for obvious reason. Seriously, this person got them right on.

67. Of course, I can’t have a post about Easter treats without including eggs made from marshmallow bark.

Okay, I don’t know about you but this looks pretty disgusting. I’m not sure why anyone in their right minds would want to eat these.

68. Nothing says Easter like a carrot cheeseball.

Now just because something looks like a carrot doesn’t mean it will taste like one. By the way, the green leafy stuff is parsley.

69. You just simply can’t have Easter with some salad stuffed carrots.

And it seems that these carrots are stuffed with egg salad and lettuce as far as I can see. By the way, the carrots seemed to be made from biscuit rolls, possibly from Pillsbury.

70. Of course, nothing says Easter like having jello eggs.

Now my one of my aunts makes jello eggs for Easter. However, they usually come in one color. These seem to have a more elaborate stripes design, since there’s not much you can do with jello creative wise.

71. Spring in the spirit of Easter with these cute little yellow chick cheese balls.

Of course, since chicks are yellow, feel free to use as much of cheese as you want whether it’s cheddar or American. White chicks have mozzarella.

72. Nothing says “Happy Easter” than these lovely yellow chick cupcakes.

Sure they may seem like blobs of icing but are nevertheless adorable. Seriously, you just want to eat one of them up, do you?

73. Of course, if you love chocolate on Easter, prepare to feast your eyes on these Easter egg brownies.

Now I certainly want to take a bite from these lovely brownie eggs. I also love their intricate designs on them as well.

74. For your baby carrots, put them in little pots in this Easter hummus snack.

Of course, I’m not sure where anyone can get flower pots like that so small. Yet, make sure that the hummus doesn’t cause a leak if those pots are from a garden store.

75. Use your plastic eggs and egg cartons to make an Easter snack tray.

Well, I did have a lot of snackadiums when I did a post on Super Bowl treats. So I suppose this counts. Well, sort of.

76. For Easter, your kids will certainly love a little lamb Rice Krispie treat.

Of course, since Rice Krispie treats tend to be sticky to begin with, dipping them in the mini marshmallow pile should be no trouble. Then again, icing helps.

77. Of course, with marshmallow peeps and Rice Krispies, you can make some sushi for your Easter dessert platter.

Not sure if Rice Krispie peeps sushi is actually sushi. Yet since it's a creative endeavor no matter how inedible and would do well in a peep diorama contest, into this post it goes.

Not sure if Rice Krispie peeps sushi is actually sushi. I mean Rice Krispies aren’t actually rice. Yet since it’s a creative endeavor no matter how inedible and would do well in a peep diorama contest, into this post it goes.

78. Hop into Easter with these loveable Easter Bunny cookies.

Sure their bodies may be chocolate and their legs and faces might be made from sugar. But these are nevertheless adorable.

79. For Easter snacks, you can’t do much better than blue bird almond treats.

Now these may not look like real birds or have wings. But they are quite cute even though I have to wonder how their features were painted since almonds are small.

80. When it comes to Easter cupcakes, sometimes candy could make a great decorating material.

Now these cupcakes are decorated with Easter candy corn and jelly beans. But though these flowers may be pretty, the toppings may hardly be edible.

Erin Go Bragh with These Lucky Treats on Saint Patrick’s Day

Posted by historymaniacmegan on February 27, 2015

Whether you observe it as a regional ethnic and/or religious holiday (in Ireland it’s a solemnity and holy day of obligation) or as an excuse to go all out and drink green Guinness beer at the parades, Saint Patrick’s Day seems to have something for everyone ranging from leprechauns, Irish music, riverdance, the major city parades, pots of gold and rainbows, shamrocks, 4 leaf clovers. Celtic Crosses, and green beer as well as excessive alcohol consumption of beer and whiskey. If you live in Chicago, then the city’s waterways will be green. For those who don’t know anything about Saint Patrick, he was a 5th century Romano-British guy who was kidnapped by pirates and enslaved in Ireland for 6 years. Once he escaped, he decided to become a priest and return there as a missionary to convert the Irish to Christianity and was later consecrated as a bishop. After he died, he was made patron saint of Ireland as well as my dad’s namesake. Now the reason we all wear green on Saint Patrick’s Day because most of Ireland is Roman Catholic and let’s say unless you went to high school with me, you don’t want to wear orange on March 17th because it denotes Protestantism and domination under the British Crown. And if you’re in Northern Ireland on Saint Patrick’s Day, well, you might not want to wear either (but the violence going on there is political, by the way). Oh, and he didn’t drive all the snakes out of Ireland either that’s just a symbolic parable since there were no snakes in Ireland to begin with yet, the shamrock story was probably real, sort of. Pittsburgh is one of the many places that celebrates Saint Patrick’s Day with a parade. And while the Irish can complain all they want to about how the Americans commemorate their patron saint’s day, it’s one of the reasons why Saint Patrick’s Day is such a popular holiday all over the world that it’s even celebrated in Japan (with some celebrations lasting all through March), Malaysia, Germany, Switzerland, France, South Korea, Argentina, and Russia (with celebrations lasting for over a week). Yet, fortunately for them, this one isn’t about Irish drinks though I might do a post on that in the future. Instead, I’ll do a post on all the wonderful treats you can make (or buy) for your Saint Patrick’s Day party whether you be a parent, repressed culinary arts student, or whatever. So to celebrate Irish pride, be wasted, or needing celebrate something between Mardi Gras and Easter, I give you my post on these Lucky Saint Patrick’s Day treats.

1. Top of the morning with this stack of green pancakes.

No surprise if this person used any green maple syrup on these. Yet, the stack seems quite high for a standard serving.

2. These jello coins would go perfect with any Irishman’s pot of gold.

Just as long as they’re not made from leprechaun urine. But let’s not dwell on such disgusting thoughts, please.

3. With these cupcakes, you can taste the rainbow.

Yet, unlike skittles, most of these cupcakes will taste like vanilla. But I’m sure that the coins are chocolate, but they probably taste bad.

4. For your Saint Patrick’s Day, hit the jackpot with these rainbow jello cups with whipped cream.

Not sure if they contain alcohol but since Saint Patrick’s Day is more for adults, I wouldn’t be surprised. Still, you have to like how they stick coins on the top in whipped cream.

5. Some have a rainbow cake, while others have a rainbow in the cake.

Seriously, I have no idea how this is done. Yet, it does look quite pretty. Not to mention, this cake has green icing.

6. If you don’t want to use food coloring for your rainbow, I’m sure fruit would do just fine.

Toppings on these cupcakes include strawberries, cantaloupe, pineapple, kiwi, blueberries, grapes, and marshmallows. Yet, for a second, I thought this was some sort of rainbow sushi configuration.

7. Make your Saint Patrick’s Day party wonderful with these lovely shamrock cookies.

Now these shamrocks seem like they can be from a Dr. Seuss storybook. Nevertheless, more intricate than I can master.

8. While red velvet is great for Valentine’s Day, Saint Patrick’s Day has green velvet cupcakes, too.

Now these cupcakes are quite green. Wonder if I can get the recipe to make some for my high school or college reunion, if my graduating classes have them.

9. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with these cupcakes of green beer pints.

I’m not sure if you want to give these to children. It might give them the wrong idea. Yet I love the icing effects on the frothing top.

10. For this Saint Patrick’s Day, put a little leprechaun in your child’s lunch this year.

I’m not sure you can retain the shape in a plastic bag, but I have to admire the artistry here. I especially like the marshmallow and chocolate eyes as well as the carrot beard.

11. These rainbow cupcakes are the exact thing your Saint Patrick’s Day party needs.

I’m not sure if the rainbows are edible but the cloud icing sure is fluffy. May not lead you to your pot of gold but the kiddies will love these.

12. Bring in the Saint Patrick’s Day freshness with these mint shamrock Oreos.

Nice they have the mint filling with a carved shamrock on top to bring in the Saint Patrick’s Day spirit. Yet, I wonder if these are bought or made.

13. For your Saint Patrick’s Day snack why don’t you try these shamrock nachos with a pot of cheese gold dip?

Of course, this would’ve been a perfect snack for my father. Unfortunately, he had to go on a low sodium diet. Yet, the chips might work but the cheese is totally Velveeta.

14. Make Saint Patrick’s Day special for your kids with these lovely little leprechaun hats.

Now these seem to include marshmallows, thin mints, chocolate, and icing. Your children will go as hyper as henshit over these.

15. You might not get your pot of gold. Yet, you can always have your pot of gold chocolate cake.

Nevertheless, I wonder what the shamrock and coins are made of. Probably not something that’s worth anything. Yet, the pot is pure chocolate and that’s all what matters.

16. Instead of tricking a leprechaun to find a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, you can make your own.

Now these include: sour rainbow Airheads, marshmallows, chocolate, filling, and golden sprinkles. Of course, you might want to carry one with both hands.

17. These cupcakes come in two flavors: vanilla and green.

Now these cupcakes would be great for children since they contain leprechauns, four leaf clovers, pots of gold, and rainbows.

18. For a great Saint Patrick’s Day centerpiece, you can’t do wrong with this leprechaun hat cake.

Of course, this hat might be too big for an actual leprechaun. Yet, I love the shamrocks on this green hat.

19. For appetizers, these small shamrock pizzas will bring you luck, sort of.

I'm not sure if a 3 shamrock pepper pizza may or may not be lucky. Yet, I think these are quite cute.

I’m not sure if a 3 shamrock pepper pizza may or may not be lucky. Yet, I think these are quite adorable.

20. Of course, nothing could make an Irish man jig than a cheese pizza with shamrock leaves.

I’m not sure what those leaves are. Must be some kind of herb that consists of a single leaf meant to resemble a 3 leaf clover.

21. This Saint Patrick’s Day, treat your guests to these cream cheese shamrock brownies.

It’s ingenious on how the shamrocks are sort of green. Yet, I love the chocolate brownie part of them more.

22. Wake up on this Saint Patrick’s Day with these rainbow waffles.

Of course, the whipped cream on the waffles doubles for clouds. Yet, I’m sure your kids will love this.

23. For a little Mexican flavor in your Saint Patrick’s Day, here is your shamrock taco.

Courtesy of Bernardo O’Higgins with the 4 leaf clover pepper to boot. Yet, I bet this is the kind of food Pope Francis eats on Saint Patrick’s Day if he ever celebrates it for Argentina has a large Irish population.

24. Nothing says Saint Patrick’s Day like a shamrock cake with gold coins on it.

Of course, this would be more in the spirit of Saint Patrick’s Day if it included a leprechaun, rainbow, and pot of gold but I don’t think the baker had the budget.

25. For your Saint Patrick’s Day lunch, you can use peppers as shamrocks.

And I see that this person is twice as lucky since they have 2 4 leaf clovers on their plate. Also, they have some creamy dressing to dip them in.

26. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with this lovely pot of gold pizza.

Of course, since peppers only come in red, green, and yellow, the rainbow doesn’t have a lot of color variation. Yet, this pizza is quite inventive and I do like the shamrocks.

27. Wish your guests luck on Saint Patrick’s Day with this shamrock bread.

Yet, how they got the shamrock in the bread, I’ll never know. Seriously, how in the hell did they do that?

28. Now you have rainbow cupcakes, yet these have the rainbow in the cupcakes.

Of course, while the bottom is in green velvet, the top rainbow part is covered in chocolate to conceal the surprise.

29. Now these green velvet cupcakes with the rainbow icing and gold coins seem good enough to eat.

And upon looking at these, I thought the icing consisted of rainbow candy canes. Yet, the coins sure seem edible but I could be wrong.

30. Since Ireland is a big potato country, then it’s only appropriate to celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with some green mashed potatoes.

Now I love potatoes just as much as the next Irish girl, but still, these are quite disgusting. Seriously, green mashed potatoes?

31. Get in the Saint Patrick’s Day spirit with treating your guests to an all in one green dinner.

Now I know this is just a normal dinner with chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, and a bun. Yet, add green food color and it seems quite sickening.

32. Treat your kids this Saint Patrick’s Day with this green macaroni and cheese.

Compared to the mashed potatoes and the dinner, it may not be as healthy but it’s sure way less disgusting.

33. For your guests at your Saint Patrick’s Day party, you can’t go wrong with these shamrock buns.

Of course, those shamrocks are probably herbs since real clover may not be tasty to humans and more delectable to cows.

34. Nothing brings out the spirit of Saint Patrick’s Day than this shamrock pizza.

If it weren’t for the red pepper bits, I could’ve sworn it was the same cheese pizza from 15 only baked. Also, those aren’t real clovers.

35. Include your dog in the Saint Patrick’s Day festivities with these shamrock dog treats.

Now I’m not sure what to think about the icing. Yet, these would be totally appropriate for an Irish wolfhound or an Irish setter since they are breeds from the Emerald Isle.

36. For appetizers, nothing will satisfy your Saint Patrick’s Day party guests more than green ravioli.

The green coloring agent here is probably pesto but I can’t be exactly sure on these things. However, I can’t comment on the filling.

37. Make your Saint Patrick’s Day special with an English muffin shamrock pizza.

Of course, I could tell it’s an English muffin since it’s small and the bottom seems powdered not smooth. Then again, it could be a bagel but I’m not sure.

38. Capture the rainbow for your Saint Patrick’s Day party with this rainbow vegetable tray.

So 3 peppers stand in for red, yellow, and green. Carrots are orange, purple cauliflower is purple, and blue is represented by blue nacho chips, which I assume is the only reason why they have anything to do here.

39. Celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with these shamrocks made from Fruity Pebbles.

Basically Fruity Pebbles is a cereal with spokesmen who celebrate holidays before they’re supposed to exist. Let’s agree that The Flintstones take place in some kind of alternative universe of some sort.

40. Eat like an Irishman this Saint Patrick’s Day with this shamrock corned beef and cabbage salad.

Okay, this looks disgusting. Also, I tried corned beef once, too salty. Seriously, that shamrock looks like brains.

41. Send your kid off to school with this one of a kind Saint Patrick’s Day lunch.

Now this includes some 4 leaf clover jello and a sandwich with a cheese and pepper 4 leaf shamrock design. Also has “LUCKY” spelled out in bread.

42. Nothing makes Saint Patrick’s Day better than these leprechaun related cake pops.

Now these consist of hats and pots of gold on sticks. I’ll be lucky if some of them have chocolate in them.

43. Rock out on your Saint Patrick’s Day party with these shamrock guitar cookies.

Those who have such cookies probably have a collection of Irish music consisting of Van Morrison, Dropkick Murphys, and U2.

44. For you Irish parents out there, I’m sure your kids will love these shamrock sandwiches in their lunches.

One consists of a parsley and cheese Irish flag while the other is of a cucumber 4 leaf clover. Yet, I’m not sure whether they’re the filling or the top.

45. For you adults out there (and I mean adults), celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with these Irish inspired jello shots.

On second thought, these would be great for my high school reunion, if it ever comes or if I ever feel like going to it.

46. Have the Irish luck on your backs this Saint Patrick’s Day morning with a 4 leaf clover pancake.

I’m not sure what to think about having syrup on that. Really makes the pancake change color for some reason.

47. I wouldn’t say it’d be wise to leave out these green owl cookies during your Saint Patrick’s Day party.

I’m not sure what significance owls have on Saint Patrick’s Day yet, these are quite cute. Seriously, they’re adorable and I don’t care.

48. For your Saint Patrick’s Day snack you can’t go wrong with shamrock pretzels.

Now this includes pretzels you can get in any bag at the grocery store, white chocolate, green icing, and green sugar. Basically the easiest treats for this post.

49. Make your guests lucky this Saint Patrick’s Day with these Rainbow and pot of gold cookies.

One thing about these cookies which makes my head scratch is how in the hell can you buy golden sprinkles? Seriously, I’ve never seen those in any store I’ve been to (or maybe I wasn’t paying any attention).

50. Treat your neighborhood Irish cop this Saint Patrick’s Day with these rainbow donuts.

Of course, some people might associate rainbow donuts with some other event, especially in San Francisco if you get my drift. Yet, these are pretty.

51. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with this loaf of rainbow bread.

All you need to add is flour, yeast, water, and hallucinogenic brown acid from Woodstock (just kidding about the last part, but I couldn’t resist for the caption).

52. Treat your Saint Patrick’s Day party guests with these lovely rainbow cookies.

Now I wonder how they brought out the colors in these beautiful cookies. Yet I know they broke them in half once out of the oven.

53. Nothing makes a better dessert on Saint Patrick’s Day than rainbow pudding.

Of course, I wonder how these colors manage to not mix together. Still, pretty creative and I love the purple.

54. For your Saint Patrick’s Day party, treat your guests to these rainbow shish kabobs.

Now I’m sure most of the veggies are of their natural color save the one that’s supposed to represent blue. I mean how many blue vegetables can you name?

55. Nothing makes a Saint Patrick’s Day party than a cake with a leprechaun, rainbow, and a pot of gold.

Of course, this cake needs 2 dishes since the pot of gold was made separately and is so big. Also, I don’t know what to make of that leprechaun.

56. Accommodate your top of the morning needs with a green bagel or 2.

Now green dinners are one thing, but I’m not sure of what to make out with green bagels. Seriously, this green craze is getting a bit out of hand.

57. Celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day with this 4 leaf clover shamrock pizza.

Of course, pesto might’ve been great to use as sauce because I don’t think these peppers bring the green out enough.

58. For appetizers, you can’t go wrong with green deviled eggs during your Saint Paddy’s celebration.

Of course, if you serve them with green ham, then you might as well have a Dr. Seuss celebration. Yet, make sure the green ham doesn’t contain trichinosis.

59. Have a healthy Saint Patrick’s Day party with this rainbow and pot of gold fruit and candy tray.

Now this rainbow consists of strawberries, orange slices, pineapple, white and purple grapes, and blueberries. Also has marshmallow and caramel candies in the gold wrapper.

60. Celebrate your Saint Patrick’s Day with a dinner of shamrock chicken pot pie.

Now this may be traditional Irish fare, but this pie must be small because it seems like it was made for one person. Note the fork.

61. For your Saint Patrick’s Day snack, you can’t do wrong with these shamrock cheese toasts.

You have to like how they use these green peppers as shamrocks and how they got cheese to resemble gold.

62. You’ve seen the shamrock cake. Now this one puts the shamrock in the cake.

Of course, the shamrock is green velvet while the rest of it is vanilla in 7 layers. Once again, I don’t know anything about such process to get this.

63. Treat your little leprechauns to these leprechaun ice cream cones.

Now I’m sure these had to spend some time in the freezer, knowing how ice cream melts. Yet, they may not help you find a pot of gold but they sure are cute.

64. Nothing says Saint Patrick’s Day like a shamrock made from Rice Krispies.

Of course, nobody should ever underestimate the creative potential of marshmallows, Rice Krispies, and food coloring. I mean I’ve basically had Rice Krispie stuff on almost every treat post.

65. Of course, you can always make Saint Patrick’s Day treats with Lucky Charms cereal.

Of course, you can also have them with a side of green milk, too. Yet, you might not want to tell Lucky the Leprechaun about this though.

66. Treat your Saint Patrick’s Day guests with these cannoles (or eclairs) with green filling.

The picture says these are eclairs but they look like cannoles to me. for some reason. Yet, I love the icing shamrocks on them.

67. Now these cookies emphasize what Saint Patrick’s Day is all about: leprechauns, pots of gold, Ireland, and beer.

Eh, I’m not sure if you’d want beer on a Saint Patrick’s Day cookie, especially if your party has kids around. Just saying.

68. Of course, you can’t have a Saint Patrick’s Day party without shamrock and Guinness cake pops.

Now I’ve had cake pops on a lot treat posts, yet I’m not sure if a Guinness pint one is a good idea. Seriously, it’s beer.

69. These Rice Krispie shamrocks wish you a happy Saint Patrick’s Day.

Of course, these seem quite happy for some reason. However, I’m not sure about putting faces on shamrocks yet I guarantee your kids will love them.

70. Wish your Saint Patrick’s Day guests good luck with these fortune cookies.

Of course, these cookies were probably the brain child of some Toshiro O’Flaherty. Yet, I’ve featured such cookies in treat posts before.

71. For the technicolor sensation, try some rainbow cake this Saint Patrick’s Day.

Of course, this comes in 6 different layers and is covered in rainbow M&Ms, apparently. Yet, it looks quite good.

72. Engage in the Irish spirit with these shamrock cookies.

Seems like someone really loves decorating shamrocks for some reason. Yet, I wonder how he or she pulls of the plaid.

73. I’m sure your little leprechauns will delight in these hat cookies.

Of course, they consist of 2 chocolate covered cookies from the store, peanut butter to hold them together, and gum drops to decorate. Of course, I’d just take off the gumdrop before eating.

74. For Saint Patrick’s Day, you can’t go wrong with these shamrock snacks.

Now these consists of pretzels, icing, green syrup, and green M&Ms. Nevertheless, these are adorable.

75. Give your guests luck on Saint Patrick’s Day with these shamrock chocolates.

And what better way to have them than green on a stick? Well, they may not all be green yet the come in so many varieties.

76. Bring some luck to your Saint Patrick’s Day morning with this 4 leaf shamrock spinach bake.

Of course, if you didn’t see the orange slices, many wouldn’t think it was a breakfast food. Yet, I wonder how they manage to pull this off.

77. For the kids on Saint Patrick’s Day, what better snacks for them to make than rainbows on a stick?

All you need are Fruit Loops, marshmallows, and skewers. Yet, I’m not sure how you get the arch most rainbows have.

78. Nothing brings the spirit of Saint Patrick’s Day than some rainbow toast.

Of course, these manage to have their color mostly because they’re all covered in sugar. Nevertheless, they are quite pretty.

79. Find your pot of gold with these leprechaun cupcakes.

Sadly, these leprechauns won’t help you find their pot of gold. Yet, they’re quite adorable and your kids will certainly love them.

80. With shamrock cupcakes like these, your Saint Patrick’s Day is as good as gold.

Now you have to admire how they used little Debbie cakes to bring out the Blarney Stone. Yet, these sure look tasty, especially since they’re chocolate.

Movie Stars Who Have Never Won an Oscar: Part 20 – Margaret Hamilton to Madeleine Carroll

Posted by historymaniacmegan on February 24, 2015

Though taller than some of her leading men, Cyd Charisse was a staple of movie musicals throughout the 1940s and 1950s as well as appeared alongside Gene Kelly and Fred Astaire.

Since my last 10 movie stars are all women, I open this final installment with a note about actresses. Now while actresses in Hollywood have always had less opportunity than men, ladies in the Golden Age of Hollywood didn’t have much better, especially with the morality clauses. Of course, a lot of actresses I’ve known during that period were in only a few known films and had less roles in movies I’ve never heard of as they aged. Yet, some who weren’t cast for their youth and beauty tended to be confined to character and supporting roles. So it’s no surprise that I didn’t compile as many. Yet, in this final edition here are 10 more. First, we have Margaret Hamilton famous for playing the Wicked Witch of the West but was actually a rather nice lady followed by Mildred Dunnock a schoolteacher who later played Mrs. Loman in Death of a Salesman. Second, there are versatile actresses Geraldine Fitzgerald and Ann Southern who’ve both had long careers as well as Nina Foch who played the Pharaoh’s daughter in The Ten Commandments (the one who found Moses). After them comes Dame Flora Robson though not pretty played roles ranging from maids, queens, and serial killers on stage and screen followed by Una O’Connor who mostly played maids. Then there’s wholesome cute girl Jean Crain whom studios wanted to play teenagers for years. Next is Cyd Charisse best known for her long marriage to Tony Martin as well as her roles in movie musicals during the 1940s and 1950s. And last but not least is the first icy Hitchcock blonde herself, Madeleine Carroll. So without further adieu, here are 10 Oscar less actresses for your reading pleasure in this final edition I bring to you.

191. Margaret Hamilton

Wicked Witch of the West: [to Dorothy] “And as for you, my fine lady, it’s true I can’t attend to you here and now as I’d like; but just try to stay out of my way – just try! I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little dog too!”
Though Margaret Hamilton would traumatize generations of children as the Wicked Witch of the West, she was a sweet woman who frequently gave to charitable organizations, spoke for pet welfare and public education, and dearly loved children.

Personal Life: (1902-1985) Born in Cleveland, Ohio. Attended Wheelock College in Boston where she became a teacher. Made her stage debut in 1923. Made her first film in 1933. Married to Paul Meserve for 7 years and had a son she raised on her own. Retired in 1982. Died of a heart attack in Salisbury, Connecticut at 82.
Famous for: American character actress best known as the Wicked Witch of the West from The Wizard of Oz. Career spanned for nearly 50 years and usually playing spinsters, particularly of the New England variety. Notable roles are Madame Du Barry from Hat, Coat, and Glove, Lucy Gurget from The Farmer Takes a Wife, Martha Perkins from Way Down East, Agatha from These Three, Drugstore Lady from Nothing Sacred, Mrs. Harper from The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Miss Gulch / The Wicked Witch of the West from The Wizard of Oz, Martha Steele from Babes in Arms, Mrs. Gideon from My Little Chickadee, Mrs. Jackson from The Invisible Woman, Norah from Twin Beds, Mrs. Larch from The Ox-Bow Incident, Myrtle Ferguson from Johnny Come Lately, Norah from State of the Union, Teacher from The Red Pony, Mrs. Theresa Appleby from Bungalow 13, Elaine Zacharides from 13 Ghosts, Mrs. Nicholson from Paradise Alley, Miss Kaller from The Anderson Tapes, Daphne Heap from Brewster McCloud, and Mae from Rosie!.
Nominated for: Hamilton was never nominated for an Oscar.
Most Crushing Loss: Not being nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1939 for The Wizard of Oz. Man, she was one mean and green witch.
Reasons: Trust me, you don’t want to give a statuette to a woman best known for playing a notorious villain known to traumatize kids for generations. It’s kind of a shame since she was a very nice person who cared deeply about children and frequently gave to charitable organizations. And it didn’t help that many children believed she was mean in real life.
Trivia: During the 1930s, she never put herself under contract to any one studio and priced her services at $1,000 a week to support herself and her son. Garland visited her and looked after her son while she was recovering in the hospital after she suffered burns during her exit from Munchkinland filming. When she returned, she said, “I won’t sue, because I know how this business works, and I would never work again. I will return to work on one condition — no more fireworks!” A stand-in for her wasn’t so lucky. Son commented that she enjoyed saying, “I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too!”-that she sometimes used it in real life. Took roles in whatever medium she could get if she was free. Though she reprised her famous role on Sesame Street, her appearance hasn’t been aired since 1976 as a result of complaints from parents of terrified children. Yet, she also appeared on Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood where she explained that she wasn’t a bad witch. Appeared in PSAs for organizations promoting the welfare of pets. Was lifelong friends with Ray Bolger. Served on the Beverly Hills Board of Education between 1948 to 1951, and was a Sunday school teacher during the 1950s.Said The Wizard of Oz was her favorite book since she was 4.

192. Mildred Dunnock

A school teacher who didn’t start acting until her 30s, Mildred Dunnock was known to play sweet motherly figures such as Linda Loman from Death of a Salesman. Yet, she’s the one in the wheelchair Richard Widmark pushes down the stairs in Kiss of Death.

Personal Life: (1901-1991) Born in Baltimore, Maryland. Attended Goucher College. Was a school teacher who didn’t start acting until her early 30s. Made her first film in 1944. Married to Keith Urmy for 58 years and had 2 children. Retired in 1987. Died of natural causes at Oak Bluffs, Massachusetts at 90.
Famous for: American character actress whose career spanned 57 years. Notable roles are Miss Ronberry from The Corn is Green, Mrs. Rizzo from Kiss of Death, Linda Loman from Death of a Salesman, Señora Espejo from Viva Zapata!, Mrs. Ruth Golding from The Jazz Singer, Martha Reno from Love Me Tender, Mrs. Wiggs from The Trouble with Harry, Aunt Rose Comfort from Baby Doll, Miss Elsie Thornton from Peyton Place, Sister Margharita (Mistress of Postulants) from The Nun’s Story, Mrs. Wandrous from Butterfield 8, Pilar from Behold a Pale Horse, Mrs. Sherman from The Spiral Staircase, and Nellie from The Pick-Up Artist.
Nominated for: Dunnock was nominated twice for Best Supporting Actress in 1951 for Death of a Salesman and 1956 for Baby Doll.
Most Crushing Loss: Not being nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1947 for Kiss of Death. I mean she should get something after what Richard Widmark did to her in that movie.
Reasons: Dunnock was nominated in very bad years and was burned out by the competition.
Trivia: Was a founding member of the Actors Studio.

193. Geraldine Fitzgerald

Though best known for playing the clueless Isabelle Linton from Wuthering Heights, Irish-American actress Geraldine Fitzgerald enjoyed a long acting career in film, theater, and television. Of course, we’re not sure if her son’s father was Orson Welles even though it’s rumored to be.

Personal Life: (1913-2005) Born in Greystones, County Wicklow in Ireland. Father was an attorney. Studied painting at the Dublin School of Art and the Polytechnic School of Art. Debuted on stage in 1932 and made her first film in 1934. Became a US citizen during WWII. Married twice and had 2 children. Married to second husband Stuart Scheftel for 48 years. Retired in 1991. Died in New York City of Alzheimer’s Disease at 91.
Famous for: Irish American actress whose career spanned 59 years. Notable roles are
Maggie Tulliver from The Mill of the Floss, Isabella from Wuthering Heights, Ann King from Dark Victory, Marthe de Brancovis from Watch on the Rhine, Edith Bolling Galt from Wilson,
Ellen Rogers / Elaine Duprez from O. S. S., Gladys Halvorsen from Nobody Lives Forever, Elizabeth Grahame from The Obsessed, Marilyn Birchfield from The Pawnbroker, Rev. Wood from Rachel, Rachel, Mrs. Jackson from The Last American Hero, Jessie from Harry and Tonto, Grandma Carr from The Mango Tree, Maud Kennaway from Diary of the Dead, Martha Bach from Arthur, and Mrs. Monahan from Easy Money.
Nominated for: Fitzgerald was nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1939 for Wuthering Heights.
Most Crushing Loss: Not receiving an honorary Oscar for her long and varied career.
Reasons: Perhaps it’s due to that we’re not sure who Michael Lindsay-Hogg’s father who’s said to resemble Orson Welles. Also was burned by the competition in 1939.
Trivia: Second husband was grandson of Isidor Straus who died on the Titanic. Was one of the first women to receive a Tony nomination for directing. Spent time as a cabaret singer in the 1970s. Mother of Let It Be director Michael Lindsay-Hogg but we’re not sure whether his father was her first husband or Orson Welles.

194. Nina Foch

Though most famous as Moses’ adoptive mother in The Ten Commandments, Dutch born Nina Foch often played aloof, and often foreign women of sophistication. She was also blonde by the way and started in horror movies.

Personal Life: (1924-2008) Born Nina Consuelo Maud Fock in Leiden, Netherlands. Mother was an American actress and singer while father was a Dutch classical music conductor. Went with her mother to the US as a toddler after her parents divorced. Made her first film in 1943. Married 3 times and had a son to second husband Dennis de Brito. Lived at Beverly Hills for over 40 years. Died of complications from the blood disorder myelodysplasia (or kidney disease) at 84.
Famous for: Dutch-born American actress and leading lady in films from the 1940s to the 1950s. Played cool, aloof, and often foreign women of sophistication. Appeared in over 80 films and hundreds of TV shows. Notable roles are Nicki Saunders from The Return of the Vampire, Lois Garland from Shadows in the Night, Celeste from Cry of the Werewolf, Frieda Brenner from Strange Affair, Constantia from A Song to Remember, Milo Roberts from An American in Paris, Marie Antoinette from Scaramouche, Elena Cantu from Sombrero, Erica Martin from Executive Suite, Bithiah from The Ten Commandments, and Helena Glabrus from Spartacus.
Nominated for: Foch was nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1954 for Executive Suite.
Most Crushing Loss: Not being nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1960 for Spartacus. Yes, she didn’t have enough screen time but her portrayal of a Roman aristocrat was one of the most historically accurate in movie history.
Reasons: Probably had to do with the fact she was in a lot of horror movies early in her career. Also burned by the competition when she was nominated. I mean it should’ve been clear that Eva Marie Saint was going to win.
Trivia: Taught at the University of Southern California’s School of Cinematic Arts as well as spent time as an acting coach. Last name “Foch” rhymes with “Gosh” (I can see where mispronunciations can get out of hand).

195. Cyd Charisse

Born Tula Ellice Finklea, Cyd Charisse adopted her stage name by using an alternative spelling of her brother’s nickname for her which was a mispronunciation of “Sis” and the surname of her first husband Nico. Also known for her long legs.

Personal Life: (1922-2008) Born Tula Ellice Finklea in Amarillo, Texas. Father was a jeweler. Took dancing lessons as a child to overcome a bout of polio. Auditioned and danced for the Ballet Russe de Monte Carlo. Went to Hollywood after the company broke up in WWII. Made her first film in 1943. Married twice and had a son to each husband. Married to second husband Tony Martin for 60 years. Retired in 2007. Died of a heart attack at 86.
Famous for: American actress and singer whose abilities were featured in 1940s and 1950s musicals and transitioned to straight acting in the 1950s. Notable roles are Lily from Something to Shout About, Deborah Andrews from The Harvey Girls, Ballerina from The Ziegfeld Follies, Conchita from Fiesta, Rosa Senta from East Side, West Side, Dancer from Singin’ in the Rain, Gabrielle Gerard from The Band Wagon, Fiona Campbell from Brigadoon, Jackie Leighton from It’s Always Fair Weather, Maria Corvier from Meet Me in Las Vegas, Ninotchka Yoschenko from Silk Stockings, Charlotte King from Twilight of the Gods, and Sarita from The Silencers.
Nominated for: Charisse was never nominated for an Oscar.
Most Crushing Loss: Not receiving an honorary Oscar for her career. Seriously, she’s one of the best known dancers in 1950s musicals. Not to mention, she had to make herself look shorter than some of her co-stars like Gene Kelly and Fred Astaire which was no easy task.
Reasons: Charisse is best known for her dancing in musicals and her long marriage to Tony Martin but not much else. And basically only acted sporadically after the 1950s.
Trivia: Was listed under The Guinness Book of World Records for “Most Valuable Legs” because it’s said MGM reportedly insured for $5 million, though she claimed this was false. Wrote a joint memoir with second husband Tony Martin. Stage name originated from her brother’s nickname for her, “Sid” which was a mispronunciation of “Sis” and the last name of her first husband Nico Charisse. Awarded the National Medal of the Arts and Humanities in 2006. Daughter-in-law died in the American Airlines Flight 191 tragedy on May 25, 1979. Produced an exercise video targeted to senior citizens.

196. Una O’Connor

Born in a Catholic nationalist family in Northern Ireland, Una O’Connor would have an extensive career as a character actress mainly playing comical wives, housekeepers, and servants, especially in 1930s horror movies.

Personal Life: (1880-1959) Born Agnes Teresa McGlade in Belfast, Ireland to a Catholic Nationalist family. Changed her name when she began acting at Dublin’s Abbey Theatre. Made her first film in 1930. Never married or had children. Retired in 1957. Died of a heart attack at 78.
Famous for: Irish character actress known for playing comical wives, housekeepers, and servants. Notable roles are Ellen Bridges from Cavalcade, Jenny Hall from The Invisible Man, Wilson from The Barretts of Wimpole Street, Mrs. Gummidge from David Copperfield, Mrs. McPhillip from The Informer, Minnie from Bride of Frankenstein, Mary from Little Lord Fauntleroy, Bess from The Adventures of Robin Hood, Miss Latham from The Sea Hawk, Mrs. Mulcahey from The Strawberry Blonde, Marie from Lillian Russell, Tobacconist from Random Harvest, Norah from Christmas in Connecticut, Sarah Leek from Holy Matrimony, Mrs. Umney from The Canterville Ghost, Mrs. Breen from The Bells of St. Mary’s, Mrs. Foreman from Of Human Bondage, Duenna from The Adventures of Don Juan, and Janet from Witness for the Prosecution.
Nominated for: O’Connor was never nominated for an Oscar.
Most Crushing Loss: Not being nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1957 for Witness for the Prosecution.
Reasons: She was basically typecast as the female comic relief. Also known to appear in a lot of horror movies and came from a Catholic nationalist family from Northern Ireland.
Trivia: Would not work on any radio program sponsored by a company that distributed or manufactured alcohol in any form.

197. Dame Flora Robson

Dame Flora Robson may not have had the looks of a leading lady, yet she played a wide range of roles on stage and screen from queens to killers. She also played Queen Elizabeth I in 2 movies.

Personal Life: (1902-1984) Born in South Shields, Durham in England. Came from a family of engineers and her father was a ship’s engineer who noticed her talent at 5. Grew up in London and attended the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art. Made her stage debut at 19 but found it difficult to get parts because she lacked the conventional looks (she had a long face, big nose, and wide mouth). Made her first film in 1931. Private life mostly focused on her sisters so she never married or had children. Retired in 1981. Possibly died of cancer at 82.
Famous for: British actress and star of stage and cinema particularly renowned for her performances in plays demanding dramatic and emotional intensity. Range extended from queens to murderesses. Notable roles are Empress Elisabeth from The Rise of Catherine the Great, Livia from I, Claudius, Queen Elizabeth I of England from Fire Over England and The Sea Hawk, Ellen from Wuthering Heights, Angelique Buiton from Saratoga Trunk, Ftatateeta from Caesar and Cleopatra, Sister Philippa from Black Narcissus, Countess Clara Platen from Saraband, Nurse from Romeo and Juliet, Dowager Empress Tzu-Hsi from 55 Days at Peking, Miss Milchrest from Murder at the Gallop, Mrs. Cassidy from Young Cassidy, Queen of Hearts from Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, and A Stygian Witch from Clash of the Titans.
Nominated for: Robson was nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1946 for Saratoga Trunk.
Most Crushing Loss: Not being nominated for any roles in her better known films most notably for Best Supporting Actress in 1947 for Black Narcissus.
Reasons: Robson was better known as a British actress on the stage than in Hollywood films. Also, Saratoga Trunk wasn’t a good movie according to critics. Not to mention being burned by the competition.
Trivia: Was of Scottish descent. Received an honorary doctorate from Durham University. Became a dame in 1960.

198. Ann Sothern

Ann Southern was an actress of many talents who performed on radio, stage, and screen for decades as well as started a variety of businesses she managed. She also survived hepatitis and a back injury in the1970s as well as lived to 92.

Personal Life: (1909-2001) Born Harriet Arlene Lake in Valley City, North Dakota. Mother was a concert singer and later vocal coach for Warner Bros. while father worked in importing and exporting. Grew up in Minneapolis, Minnesota. At 4, her parents separated and would divorce in 1927. Started taking piano lessons at 5 and accompanied her mother in concert tours as long as school permitted it. Began voice lessons at 14. Attended the University of Washington but dropped out after a year and soon joined her mother where she won a role in a Warner Bros. revue. Made her first film in 1927. Married twice and had a daughter to second husband Robert Sterling. Contracted infections hepatitis after getting impure serum from England in the late 1940s which confined her to a bed. In 1974, she was injured in Jacksonville, Florida when a fake tree fell on her back which left her with a fractured lumbar vertebrae and damaged nerves in her legs. She was then subject to multiple hospitalizations, weight gain, back braces, depression, physical pain, and had to walk with a cane for the rest of her life. Retired in 1987 and moved to Ketchum, where she lived for the rest of her life. Died of heart failure at 92.
Famous for: American actress whose career spanned 6 decades starting from bit parts to starring roles. Worked on stage, radio, film, and television. Notable roles are Maisie Ravier from The Maisie series, Flo Adams from Brother Orchid, Joyce Harmon from Words and Music, Rita Phipps from A Letter to Three Wives, Crystal Carpenter from The Blue Gardenia, Sue Ellen Gamadge from The Best Man, Sade from Lady in a Cage, Mrs. Grace Argona from Sylvia, and Tisha Doughty from The Whales of August.
Nominated for: Sothern was nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1987 for The Whales of August.
Most Crushing Loss: Not being nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1949 for A Letter to Three Wives.
Reasons: Sothern was just burned by the competition during her nomination. Also, she only acted sporadically in her later years.
Trivia: Maternal grandfather was Danish violinist Hans Nielsen and paternal grandfather was Quaker engineer and naval architect Simon Lake. Won a state sponsored contest for student musical composer 3 years in a row in high school. Was a classmate of Eddie Albert in high school and graduated in the same class with him. Converted to Roman Catholicism in 1952 and credited her faith with helping her get over her health issues. Had her own TV show. Opened the Ann Sothern Sewing Center in Sun Valley, Idaho which sold fabric, patterns and sewing machines in the 1950s. Had a cattle ranch in Idaho named the A Bar S Cattle Company. Owned Vincent Productions, Inc. as well as nightclubs in Las Vegas and Chicago. Also had her own music company called A Bar S Music Company and released albums. Mother of Tisha Sterling.

199. Jeanne Crain

While Jean Crain striven to be a serious actress on film, the studios always wanted her to play cute girls. For instance, despite thinking that Pinky would lead to better roles, 20th Century Fox cast her as a 13 year old girl despite that she was 25, married, and a mom.

Personal Life: (1925-2003) Born in Barstow, California and grew up in Los Angeles. Father was a school teacher. Was given a screen test opposite Orson Welles while in high school but didn’t get the part. Made her first film at 18 in 1943. Married to Paul Brinkman for 57 years (though they were separated at the time of his death) and had 7 children. Retired in 1975. Died of a heart attack at 78.
Famous for: American actress whose career spanned for 38 years. Worked from bit parts to starring roles. Notable roles are Margy Frake from State Fair, Ruth Berent from Leave Her to Heaven, Marjorie ‘Margie’ MacDuff from Margie, Julia Rogers from Centennial Summer, Deborah Bishop from A Letter to Three Wives, Patricia ‘Pinky’ Johnson from Pinky, Ann Gilbreth from Cheaper by the Dozen, Deborah Higgins from People Will Talk, Deborah Young from O. Henry’s Full House, Ruth Stanton Bowman from Dangerous Crossing, Connie Jones/Mitzi Jones from Gentlemen Marry Brunettes, Dora Temple from The Fastest Gun Alive, Diane Blane from The Tattered Dress, Letty Page from The Joker Is Wild, Laura Riley from Guns in the Timberland, Tenet/Nefertiti from Nefertiti, Queen of the Nile, Peggy Shannon from Madison Avenue, and Claudia Procula.
Nominated for: Crain was nominated for Best Actress in 1949 for Pinky.
Most Crushing Loss: Not being nominated for Best Supporting Actress in 1945 for Leave Her to Heaven. As Gene Tierney’s adoptive sister, she manages to hide a large amount of angst underneath that veneer of smiles and wholesomeness.
Reasons: Crain was more or less burned by the competition. Also, her character was supposed to be black passing for white, which should’ve went to Lena Horne anyway. Not to mention, while she hoped her role in Pinky would give her more serious parts, 20th Century Fox had other ideas like casting her as a 13 year old despite being 25, married, and a mother. Being cast as cute girls would get her passed over for more serious roles she should’ve played.
Trivia: Also noted for her ice skating. Miss Pan Pacific at the Pan-Pacific Auditorium in Los Angeles while in high school. In the late 1940s and early 1950s, was nicknamed ‘Hollywood’s Number One party girl’, and she was quoted saying that she was invited to at least 200 parties a year. Was earning $3,500 a week in the 1950s as well as her own dress line during the 1970s.

200. Madeleine Carroll

Madeleine Carroll would make movie history with her appearance in The 39 Steps as Alfred Hitchcock’s first icy blonde that would appear in many of his later films. Yet, her service during WWII were just as remarkable as well.

Personal Life: (1906-1987) Born Edith Madeleine Carroll in West Bromwich, Staffordshire in England. Mother was a French immigrant while father was an Irish professor of languages. Attended and graduated from the University of Birmingham and taught an all girls’ boarding school. Made her first film in 1928. Married 4 times with second husband being Sterling Hayden. Had a daughter with fourth husband Andrew Heiskell. Became a US citizen in 1944. Moved to Paris in 1951 and would later move to Spain. Retired in 1955. Died in Marabella, Spain from pancreatic cancer at 81.
Famous for: British American actress who was popular in both the 1930s and 1940s. At the peak of her success she was the highest paid actress in the world, earning a then staggering $250,000 in 1938. Notable roles are Diana Cheswick from The Guns of Loos, Lucille de Choisigne from Madame Guillotine, Queen Caroline Matilde of Denmark from Loves of a Dictator, Pamela from The 39 Steps, Elsa Carrington from Secret Agent, Judy Perrie from The General Died at Dawn, Linda Stewart from Safari, Charlotte Dunterry from Virginia, Carol Delbridge from Bahama Passage, Karen Bentley from My Favorite Blonde, and Mrs. Erlynne from The Fan.
Nominated for: Carroll was never nominated for an Oscar.
Most Crushing Loss: Not receiving an honorary Oscar for her career and her distinction as the prototype for the icy Hitchcock blonde. Also, not receiving the Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award for her tireless efforts during and after WWII.
Reasons: Well, for one, there weren’t as many slots for Academy Award nominees as there are now in the 1930s (especially in the early years). Also, took an acting hiatus in WWII after her sister was killed in a German air raid during the Blitz and would be involved in the plight of European children some time afterwards.
Trivia: Was the first Hitchcock blonde. Was a Red Cross (and later US Army Air Corps) nurse during WWII after her sister was killed in the Blitz. Donated her chateau outside Paris to more than 150 orphans and arranged groups in California to knit for them. Awarded the Legion d’Honneur for her efforts by France as well as the American Medal of Freedom. Dwight D. Eisenhower said that of all the movie stars he met in Europe during the war, he was the most impressed with her and Herbert Marshall. Conducted a radio program fostering French-American friendship and helped in the rehabilitation of concentration camp victims after WWII. Formed a production company with her third husband which made several 2 reel documentaries with one strongly shown in Canada focusing on the devastation of children’s lives in WWII Europe which became a prime source of funds of for the manufacture of artificial limbs for wounded children. First British beauty to be offered a major American film contract. Fourth husband was publisher of Life Magazine.

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The Lone Girl in a Crowd

The thoughts and perceptions of an aspiring writer on life and the world around her

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