The Wonderful World of Bath Soaps

Bath House Soaps

As we all know, soap is a rather essential product in our every day living. After all, we use soap to clean ourselves with whenever we take a bath or shower. We also use it for dishes, our clothes, and our spaces. It also comes in forms like bars, salts, liquids. and powder detergent. Still, while most people view soap as a cleaning agent to wash things and people with, this doesn’t stop people from using it for creative artistic expression. Mostly they’d make their own soap designs as gifts, but sometimes you’d wonder. Still, what I’m about to show you are the many designs which people and companies have made and manufacture. So without further adieu, here are some uniquely designed soaps for your viewing pleasure. Of course, we’ll be seeing designs from bath soap, naturally.

1. Heard of soap on a rope? Well, here’s soap on a roll.

Actually, using your toilet roll as a soap dispenser might come in handy. Except I would need the roll for toilet paper.

Actually, using your toilet roll as a soap dispenser might come in handy. Except I would need the roll for toilet paper.

2. A little butter on your toast, perhaps?

Okay, it's soap so I'm probably not going to eat that. Still, I can't tell whether the yellow stuff is butter or melted cheese. Seems more like melted cheese to me.

Okay, it’s soap so I’m probably not going to eat that. Still, I can’t tell whether the yellow stuff is butter or melted cheese. Seems more like melted cheese to me.

3. You’ve heard about growing a mustache. How about washing with one?

Available in brown and pink, apparently. And no, you can't eat them though they do resemble chocolates if you know what I mean.

Available in brown and pink, apparently. And no, you can’t eat them though they do resemble chocolates if you know what I mean.

4. Man, can’t believe you can have money in your soap.

It's going to take me a hell of a long time to get my $10 back. And even then, I'm not sure if I can use it to buy anything.

It’s going to take me a hell of a long time to get my $10 back. And even then, I’m not sure if I can use it to buy anything.

5. Smell like a tropical paradise with some coconut soap.

I don't know about you, but that resembles more of a ball of cream filled chocolate than a coconut to me. And it seems delicious.

I don’t know about you, but that resembles more of a ball of cream filled chocolate than a coconut to me. And it seems delicious unlike real coconut.

6. For a great gift for your sweetheart for Valentine’s Day, how about a nice chocolate heart soap?

Of course, your girlfriend will get mad at you when she realizes that it's soap and not chocolate. This is especially true if that girlfriend is me.

Of course, your girlfriend will get mad at you when she realizes that it’s soap and not chocolate. This is especially true if that girlfriend is me.

7. Hey, would you want some fries with your Burger King order?

Still, eating these fries might cause you to cough out soap bubbles when you try to wash them down. Also, won't taste in any way like French fries.

Still, eating these fries might cause you to cough out soap bubbles when you try to wash them down. Also, won’t taste in any way like French fries.

8. And now, scrub yourself clean with soap kebabs.

Now while this is pretty creative, I'm sure it's now for kids. I mean the skewers can be quite sharp and poke somebody's eye out.

Now while this is pretty creative, I’m sure it’s now for kids. I mean the skewers can be quite sharp and poke somebody’s eye out.

9. How about some popcorn for the movie?

Then again, this popcorn soap may be better suited to wash yourself after you come back from the movies smelling of real popcorn and who knows what else.

Then again, this popcorn soap may be better suited to wash yourself after you come back from the movies smelling of real popcorn and who knows what else.

10. Jesus Christ came to this world to cleanse the world from sin as well as died on the cross for it. Now you can have Jesus on a rope cleanse your body, face, and naughty bits.

Now this is just priceless. Still, knowing it's Jesus on a rope, I can't just pass this one up. Let's just say, I can have a lot of fun with this one but I also don't want to say anything inappropriate either.

Now this is just priceless. Still, knowing it’s Jesus on a rope, I can’t just pass this one up. Let’s just say, I can have a lot of fun with this one but I also don’t want to say anything inappropriate either.

11. As 96.1 KISS FM always said, “It’s peanut butter jelly time.”

Compared to real sandwiches, these PB&J soaps seem to be much neater than the real thing. Of course, you wouldn't want to eat this one since it may kill you.

Compared to real sandwiches, these PB&J soaps seem to be much neater than the real thing. Of course, you wouldn’t want to eat this one since it may kill you.

12. Nothing cleans better than a bunch of disembodied baby hands.

Now this is creepy. Seriously, baby hands? Who the hell thought this would be a great soap idea? There's no way I'd want to clean my armpits with the hand of a 9 month old!

Now this is creepy. Seriously, baby hands? Who the hell thought this would be a great soap idea? There’s no way I’d want to clean my armpits with the hand of a 9 month old!

13. Love may stink but the soap shall set you clean.

Of course, you don't want to give this soap to your sweetheart on Valentine's Day would you? Might send the wrong message.

Of course, you don’t want to give this soap to your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day would you? Might send the wrong message.

14. Sometimes the path to good hygiene is just a click away.

Still, I'm sure that these mice may not be great for your computer, but they will sure do you wonders in the shower. Also, a great way to tell your local IT guy that he freaking stinks.

Still, I’m sure that these mice may not be great for your computer, but they will sure do you wonders in the shower. Also, a great way to tell your local IT guy that he freaking stinks.

15. Of course, you can’t leave without grabbing a drumstick of soap, that is.

Nevertheless, hope rubbing yourself with this soap in the shower doesn't make you smell like garlic or seasoning. The marinade may smell great on a real chicken, but not so much on you.

Nevertheless, hope rubbing yourself with this soap in the shower doesn’t make you smell like garlic or seasoning. The marinade may smell great on a real chicken, but not so much on you, except to a cannibal.

16. For the Jew in your life, may I suggest to you a matzo ball soap as a gift for Chanukah?

I don't think matzo balls are that big. Still, it's interesting it comes with its own box with a stereotypically Jewish guy on it and Hebrew lettering.

I don’t think matzo balls are that big. Still, it’s interesting it comes with its own box with a stereotypically Jewish guy on it and Hebrew lettering.

17. Now having a Tyrannosaurus Rex soap will make you cleaner than you’ve ever been since 65 million years ago.

Still, this would make a great gift for a young boy since boys tend to go crazy over dinosaurs. Well, unless that special little boy in your life tends to be the kid from Jurassic Park.

Still, this would make a great gift for a young boy since boys tend to go crazy over dinosaurs. Well, unless that special little boy in your life tends to be the kid from Jurassic Park.

18. Summer is the time of frozen treats on a popsicle stick whether they have ice cream or not.

Of course, these are soaps. Yet, this hasn't stopped one person from biting into the ice cream sandwich one.

Of course, these are soaps. Yet, this hasn’t stopped one person from biting into the ice cream sandwich one.

19. Looks like Fido needs a treat.

Then again, this might be better used to clean Fido than to feed him. In fact, feeding him this bone soap may poison him.

Then again, this might be better used to clean Fido than to feed him. In fact, feeding him this bone soap may poison him. And now you know.

20. Of course, since everyone loves bacon, we just have to have bacon soap.

Of course, sometimes it's better to eat bacon than to smell like it. I mean no one wants to smell like bacon grease since it may attract the neighborhood dogs.

Of course, sometimes it’s better to eat bacon than to smell like it. I mean no one wants to smell like bacon grease since it may attract the neighborhood dogs.

21. Now here’s a soap of a Japanese sumo wrestler.

Please tell me he's wearing a loin cloth under there. I know it's really hard to tell due to the that he's so morbidly obese.

Please tell me he’s wearing a loin cloth under there. I know it’s really hard to tell due to the that he’s so morbidly obese like most sumo wrestlers.

22. For Valentine’s Day, try out these cute little candy soap hearts.

Of course, the real Valentine's Day heart candies are very much inedible anyway as well as made by Necco, a company known for its bad candies. Still, this might be a better gift than real candy hearts.

Of course, the real Valentine’s Day heart candies are very much inedible anyway as well as made by Necco, a company known for its bad candies. Still, this might be a better gift than real candy hearts.

23. Be up to your Easter Sunday best with these colored egg soaps.

It's clever that these come in a little egg carton. However, I wish they had one of them in purple. Still, at least they won't become egg salad once the Easter season is gone.

It’s clever that these come in a little egg carton. However, I wish they had one of them in purple. Still, at least they won’t become egg salad once the Easter season is gone.

24. My mama always said life is like a box of chocolate soaps because you never know what you’re going to get.

Couldn't resist the Forrest Gump reference. Still, unlike real assorted chocolates, at least you don't have to worry what you're going to get with using these soaps. I mean they all have the same contents.

Couldn’t resist the Forrest Gump reference. Still, unlike real assorted chocolates, at least you don’t have to worry what you’re going to get with using these soaps. I mean they all have the same contents.

25. Now there’s nothing better to scrub your hands than some hand soap on a rope.

Then again, when I mentioned "hand soap on a rope" this isn't really the kind I had in mind. Still, looks like something you'd see in the Addams family bathroom or something.

Then again, when I mentioned “hand soap on a rope” this isn’t really the kind I had in mind. Still, looks like something you’d see in the Addams family bathroom or something.

26. Now here’s some soaps of hot spicy peppers you’d put in Mexican food.

I'm sure while most people love Mexican food to some extent, I'm sure that no one wants to smell like it. And I'm certainly sure no one wants to smell like chili or jalapeno peppers either.

I’m sure while most people love Mexican food to some extent, I’m sure that no one wants to smell like it. And I’m certainly sure no one wants to smell like chili or jalapeno peppers either.

27. Now here’s the soap of a true wiener.

Hey, at least this soap resembles a wiener dog or dachshund. Still, anyone who assumed differently ought to get their minds out of the gutter.

Hey, at least this soap resembles a wiener dog or dachshund. Still, anyone who assumed differently ought to get their minds out of the gutter.

28. Now these pig soaps may come straight out of Old McDonald’s farm.

However, despite how nice these pig soaps may smell, they won't be able to make you smell better if you work on a pig farm. Believe me, I watched Waking Ned Devine on that one.

However, despite how nice these pig soaps may smell, they won’t be able to make you smell better if you work on a pig farm. Believe me, I watched Waking Ned Devine on that one.

29. If you or your kids love Legos, they’d love these soaps of Legos blocks.

Unlike real Legos, it won't hurt you when you step on them. Well, eventually. But stepping on one of these in the shower will make you slip and perhaps fall.

Unlike real Legos, it won’t hurt you when you step on them. Well, eventually. But stepping on one of these in the shower will make you slip and perhaps fall.

30. Now here’s some great soaps of water lilies.

Now I don't know about you but these soap waterlilies are simply stunningly amazing. In fact, they almost seem to resemble the real thing so closely.

Now I don’t know about you but these soap waterlilies are simply stunningly amazing. In fact, they almost seem to resemble the real thing so closely.

31. These skull and cross bones soaps would be a great gift for a pirate.

Still, if you read about my movie history post on the Golden Age of Piracy, you may get the impression that many 17th-early 18th century pirates had so atrocious hygiene habits that your average pirate ship would make the 1969 Woodstock concert seem like Mr. Monk's apartment.

Still, if you read about my movie history post on the Golden Age of Piracy, you may get the impression that many 17th-early 18th century pirates had so atrocious hygiene habits that your average pirate ship would make the 1969 Woodstock concert seem like Mr. Monk’s apartment.

32. For those who work at a nuclear facility, I’m sure this radioactive soap and sponge kit would make a great gift.

Now luckily, using this kit to clean yourself won't lead you to radiation exposure. Of course, I can't say the same about venturing near Chernobyl, Fukishima, or the Waltz Mill Westinghouse building near the Ruffsdale KOA.

Now luckily, using this kit to clean yourself won’t lead you to radiation exposure. Of course, I can’t say the same about venturing near Chernobyl, Fukishima, or the Waltz Mill Westinghouse building near the Madison KOA. Yes, I know there was a nuclear meltdown at Waltz Mill in the 1970s.

33. May shower time never be the same with these rainbow heart soaps.

Now I don't know about you but I can't see why anybody shouldn't love rainbows, especially on hearts. Still, these are so pretty and cute. Hope they smell good, too.

Now I don’t know about you but I can’t see why anybody shouldn’t love rainbows, especially on hearts. Still, these are so pretty and cute. Hope they smell good, too.

34. Now I’m sure these cupcake soaps are a real treat.

However, I must warn you don't ever use these cupcake soaps as real treats if you know what I mean. Still, they're still pretty cute.

However, I must warn you don’t ever use these cupcake soaps as real treats if you know what I mean. Still, they’re still pretty cute. Especially so with flowers, sprinkles, and cherries on top.

35. All right, leggo my soapy eggo if you dare.

Yes, this is waffle soap. And no, I'm not sure if it tastes like maple syrup. That, or whether the maple syrup on that is actually solid soap.

Yes, this is waffle soap. And no, I’m not sure if it tastes like maple syrup. That, or whether the maple syrup on that is actually solid soap either.

36. For Ocktoberfest, clean yourself with these soaps of beer and pretzels.

Every German bar should have these in their bathrooms during the Ocktoberfest. Still, I'm sure that the beer is soap though I don't know what to make of the pretzels. I mean they seem kind of real to me.

Every German bar should have these in their bathrooms during the Ocktoberfest. Still, I’m sure that the beer is soap though I don’t know what to make of the pretzels. I mean they seem kind of real to me.

37. Treat yourself to these sticky bun cinnamon roll soaps.

Okay, now just looking at these sticky bun soaps is now making me hungry. And I know these are soaps too. They look so real yet like the real thing, not very good for you.

Okay, now just looking at these sticky bun soaps is now making me hungry. And I know these are soaps too. They look so real yet like the real thing, not very good for you.

38. Finally, chocolate cookie soaps.

Then again, I'd rather have the real chocolate chip cookies than soaps of them. I mean I really love chocolate chip cookies, especially when they're fresh out of the oven.

Then again, I’d rather have the real chocolate chip cookies than soaps of them. I mean I really love chocolate chip cookies, especially when they’re fresh out of the oven.

39. And now, the new Apple iPhone.

Whoever thought this was a real iPhone is bound to be disappointed when they realize that none of the buttons don't work. Also, when it gathers suds in the shower.

Whoever thought this was a real iPhone is bound to be disappointed when they realize that none of the buttons don’t work. Also, when it gathers suds in the shower.

40. Bath time will never be the same again with this Nintendo Wii soap.

Of course, while great for bath time and possibly smelling nice, it's probably not as fun as having a real Wii. Still, at least it won't electrocute you in the tub.

Of course, while great for bath time and possibly smelling nice, it’s probably not as fun as having a real Wii. Still, at least it won’t electrocute you in the tub.

41. I give you Oreo cookie soaps.

Let me make this perfectly clear. Don't use these Oreos to dunk in milk or eat them. Believe me, you don't want anyone to call the poison hotline on you.

Let me make this perfectly clear. Don’t use these Oreos to dunk in milk or eat them. Believe me, you don’t want anyone to call the poison hotline on you.

42. Here are some doughnut soaps with different colors of icing.

These would be great soaps for bathrooms at doughnut joints and police stations. Then again, perhaps police tend to have healthier eating habits than we think.

These would be great soaps for bathrooms at doughnut joints and police stations. Then again, perhaps police tend to have healthier eating habits than we think.

43. Scrub your way into the shower with an old time Nintendo game controller.

Of course, this might be better for scrubbing your arm pits than beating your friend at Super Mario Bros.

Of course, this might be better for scrubbing your arm pits than beating your friend at Super Mario Bros.

44. Of course, we always need to scrub our fingers.

Yet, I don't know if I'd be comfortable with cleaning myself with finger soaps. Seriously, this seems to be rather disturbing.

Yet, I don’t know if I’d be comfortable with cleaning myself with finger soaps. Seriously, this seems to be rather disturbing.

45. Well, let’s settle into some delicious pepperoni pizza.

Oh, wait. This is soap. Better put in the bathroom before I forget it's not edible. I might need my stomach pumped if I take a bite out of this.

Oh, wait. This is soap. Better put in the bathroom before I forget it’s not edible. I might need my stomach pumped if I take a bite out of this.

46. For your Halloween Party, I’m sure stocking your bathroom with eyeball soaps may do.

Then again, I'm sure you might not want to get the eyeball soaps out when the kids are awake. Still, pretty disgusting and creepy.

Then again, I’m sure you might not want to get the eyeball soaps out when the kids are awake. Still, pretty disgusting and creepy.

47. Of course, I’m sure the NRA has their bathrooms stocked with these pistol soaps.

Still, I'm sure using this gun soap to fake a suicide attempt is a common occurrence. Yet, I hope people don't mistake the real gun for this, especially in the shower. It wouldn't be pretty.

Still, I’m sure using this gun soap to fake a suicide attempt is a common occurrence. Yet, I hope people don’t mistake the real gun for this, especially in the shower. It wouldn’t be pretty.

48. If you need to defend yourself, here’s a soap of brass knuckles.

Then again, I don't think soap knuckles would stand a chance against any kind of metal knuckle imaginable. Yet, a rather good imitation of brass knuckles if you know what I mean. Not to mention, perfectly safe for kids.

Then again, I don’t think soap knuckles would stand a chance against any kind of metal knuckle imaginable. Yet, a rather good imitation of brass knuckles if you know what I mean. Not to mention, perfectly safe for kids.

49. Look, it’s cheese soap. And man, there are a lot of different types.

I'm sure any of these soap cheeses would make a great addition for any bathroom in Wallace and Gromit's house. This is especially so with the Wensleydale soap.

I’m sure any of these soap cheeses would make a great addition for any bathroom in Wallace and Gromit’s house. This is especially so with the Wensleydale soap.

50. Have a steady supply of soap with this lovely sushi soap set.

This way you wouldn't just know how to keep clean, but you'd learn how to use chopsticks as well. This would especially come in handy the next time you visit a Japanese restaurant.

This way you wouldn’t just know how to keep clean, but you’d learn how to use chopsticks as well. This would especially come in handy the next time you visit a Japanese restaurant.

51. Add a little color to your bathroom with these crayon soaps.

Now if only they came in more colors than these. Because I'd really like a purple one. Still, great for kids

Now if only they came in more colors than these. Because I’d really like a purple one. Still, great for kids.

52. Now the first rule of Fight Club is that nobody talks about Fight Club.

If you've seen the movie, you'd know what this soap references. Still, let's just say I don't want to see that movie again.

If you’ve seen the movie, you’d know what this soap references. Still, let’s just say I don’t want to see that movie again.

53. Well, that looks like a tasty croissant roll.

Oh, wait, that's soap. Still, do they have these in bathrooms at French restaurants. I mean they really should.

Oh, wait, that’s soap. Still, do they have these in bathrooms at French restaurants. I mean they really should.

54. Rubber duckie, you’re the one. You make bath time so much fun. Rubber duckie, I’m totally fond of you.

Of course, thank God that Rubber Duckie isn't a soap. Else, he'd be gone before Ernie would realize it.

Of course, thank God that Rubber Duckie isn’t a soap. Else, he’d be gone before Ernie would realize it. Still, the tub thing is pretty cute.

55. Ain’t no soap bar like a gay bar.

Note to self: If I have to buy something for a gay person this Christmas, don't buy this soap.

Note to self: If I have to buy something for a gay person this Christmas, don’t buy this soap. Seriously, it might offend the LGBT community.

56. Now how about having to clean yourself with a piece of shit?

Yes, I know that this soap is supposed to look like a steaming pile of shit. Yet, unlike real shit, it will get you clean.

Yes, I know that this soap is supposed to look like a steaming pile of shit. Yet, unlike real shit, it will get you clean.

57. Rub your hands clean with this magic lantern soap.

Unlike the one in Aladdin, rubbing your hands with this magic lantern won't cause a genie pop out that will grant you three wishes.

Unlike the one in Aladdin, rubbing your hands with this magic lantern won’t cause a genie pop out that will grant you three wishes.

58. Have a lovely piece of artwork in your bathroom such as a soap of the Venus de Milo.

Of course, if you actually use this soap to clean yourself with, remember that it won't be as pretty as this by the time you're done with it.

Of course, if you actually use this soap to clean yourself with, remember that it won’t be as pretty as this by the time you’re done with it. However we never knew where her arms went or what they looked like.

59. Scrub yourself clean with Michelangelo’s David.

Now while Charleton Heston was sure that Michelangelo was 100% heterosexual, historical evidence begs to differ. Still, it's almost as true to the real thing upon green.

Now while Charlton Heston was sure that Michelangelo was 100% heterosexual, historical evidence begs to differ. Still, it’s almost as true to the real thing upon green. Nevertheless, would make a great gift for Sister Wendy Becket, who has a thing for male nudes.

60. Make your bath time a masterpiece with Sandro Boticelli’s The Birth of Venus.

As far as Renaissance art pieces go, this is a very appropriate piece you can put on a soap. After all, it has Aphrodite rising from the sea through a large shell.

As far as Renaissance art pieces go, this is a very appropriate piece you can put on a soap. After all, it has Aphrodite rising from the sea through a large shell.

61. If your girlfriend’s a fan of the 1997 James Cameron film, she’d love this soap rendition.

On second thought, you might want to reconsider. I mean we all know that the ship sinks and that Jack dies after he and Rose consummate their relationship in the back of a Model T.

On second thought, you might want to reconsider. I mean we all know that the ship sinks and that Jack dies after he and Rose consummate their relationship in the back of a Model T.

62. As we have these candy mints after dinner, you might want to use these candy mints soaps before.

Now I'm sure when some one gives you a breath mint, it means you have halitosis. When someone gives you breath mint soap, it means that either you stink or you're dirty.

Now I’m sure when some one gives you a breath mint, it means you have halitosis. When someone gives you breath mint soap, it means that either you stink or you’re dirty.

63. Of course, this laptop soap would go great for any Silicon Valley bathroom.

Now I'm sure this soap computer won't work like a real one. Yet, it certainly will get you clean. Also may be available in many different colors.

Now I’m sure this soap computer won’t work like a real one. Yet, it certainly will get you clean. Also may be available in many different colors.

64. Now here’s a soap of a potato to grace your bathroom. Looks almost like the real thing doesn’t it?

Yes, this is a potato soap. And no, you can't bake it, mash it, or cut it up. Yet, it will get you clean in the shower even though it might make others scratch their heads in confusion.

Yes, this is a potato soap. And no, you can’t bake it, mash it, or cut it up. Yet, it will get you clean in the shower even though it might make others scratch their heads in confusion.

65. While we have Lego soaps, we also have Lego people soaps, too. And in many different colors.

Call this one a Lego people Rainbow Coalition if you will. However, I'm sure that real Lego people didn't come in all these lovely different colors other than yellow.

Call this one a Lego people Rainbow Coalition if you will. However, I’m sure that real Lego people didn’t come in all these lovely different colors other than yellow.

66. For the holiday season, I’m sure Christmas light soaps would make your bathroom seem festive.

They may not light up, but at least you don't have to decorate the outside of your house with them. Of course, they're just bulbs if you know what I mean.

They may not light up, but at least you don’t have to decorate the outside of your house with them. Of course, they’re just bulbs if you know what I mean.

67. Smell fresh as a daisy by rubbing your body with these perfume bottle soaps.

Of course, these soaps won't just get you clean but will also make you smell as nice as normal perfume would. If not, then better.

Of course, these soaps won’t just get you clean but will also make you smell as nice as normal perfume would. If not, then better.

68. What better way to get yourself clean than with a soap resembling microbes on a petri dish.

This one is a soap of salmonella, you know the food disease you get from eating uncooked eggs. Yeah, that's the one all right.

This one is a soap of salmonella, you know the food disease you get from eating uncooked eggs. Yeah, that’s the one all right.

69. Perhaps you can smell like flowers with this lovely floral soap.

Then again, perhaps this soap should just be for display only. I mean these flowers are so beautiful if you know what I mean. Still, how in the hell do they make stuff like this?

Then again, perhaps this soap should just be for display only. I mean these flowers are so beautiful if you know what I mean. Still, how in the hell do they make stuff like this?

70. Well, there’s nothing like a cup of coffee in the morning.

And there's nothing like it in the morning than washing your face with soaps resembling coffee beans either.

And there’s nothing like it in the morning than washing your face with soaps resembling coffee beans either.

71. Perhaps we can have some soap eggs to go with that soap bacon.

Of course, you wouldn't want these eggs for breakfast. Yet, they're on the skillet anyway for display purposes.

Of course, you wouldn’t want these eggs for breakfast. Yet, they’re on the skillet anyway for display purposes.

72. I’m sure they won’t see it coming with this soap grenade.

At least unlike a real grenade, this soap one won't make your house explode or kill you if you pull the pin.

At least unlike a real grenade, this soap one won’t make your house explode or kill you if you pull the pin.

73. Now check out this soap handgun in the bathroom.

Now never in my life have I ever seen a soap that can be this terrifying. Even more scary is that this one comes with its very own bullet. Please, don't ask me to wash with this in the shower.

Now never in my life have I ever seen a soap that can be this terrifying. Please, don’t ask me to wash with this in the shower. Still, there’s nothing cool about it.

74. Soapy, soapy, night. Paint your pallet blue and bright.

How many times has Vincent Van Gogh's Starry Night been immortalized? Still, I wouldn't wash with this soap since it's so pretty.

How many times has Vincent Van Gogh’s Starry Night been immortalized? Still, I wouldn’t wash with this soap since it’s so pretty.

75. Of course, what Star Wars fan wouldn’t want a soap of Han Solo frozen in carbonite in their bathroom?

Of course, I've seen Han Solo carbonite stuff in a lot of things like soaps, chocolates, coffee tables, and more. I wonder if Harrison Ford has one of these.

Of course, I’ve seen Han Solo carbonite stuff in a lot of things like soaps, chocolates, coffee tables, and more. I wonder if Harrison Ford has one of these.

76. How about a bacon cheeseburger with some pickles and fries?

Of course, if this was real food, it wouldn't be good for you. Yet, I'm sure the bacon is much too big for the rest of the burger.

Of course, if this was real food, it wouldn’t be good for you. Yet, I’m sure the bacon is much too big for the rest of the burger.

77. Look good with these tubes of lipstick soap.

Sure these tubes may not smear your face or leave splotches on kisses, but they will get you clean.

Sure these tubes may not smear your face or leave splotches on kisses, but they will get you clean. And no, they don’t seem to come in many different colors.

78.These jigsaw puzzle piece soaps sure do go together.

Of course, there's a chance that all these pieces won't be used up at the same time, if at all. Still, why don't they have purple?

Of course, there’s a chance that all these pieces won’t be used up at the same time, if at all. Still, why don’t they have purple?

79. Wash your body with these beautiful soap bottles.

Now these bottles seem so pretty that it almost makes me reluctant to use them. Then again, they probably were only made for display.

Now these bottles seem so pretty that it almost makes me reluctant to use them. Then again, they probably were only made for display.

80. Of course, these precious gemstone soaps sure do give off light like real ones.

Yes, but I have a feeling that these were way easier to make than the other ones. Also, I'm sure that it's very obvious they're not gemstones.

Yes, but I have a feeling that these were way easier to make than the other ones. Also, I’m sure that it’s very obvious they’re not gemstones.

Don’t Try This at Home Craft Projects

Crafts

Crafts have always been with us and will probably go on forever. Whether it’s from the kid made to do some project in art class or the adult with repressed creative impulses who wants to make money from Etsy, we’ve seen them all. Such arts could range from the DIY to sewing and knitting, upholstery, taxidermy, beading, jewelry making, or what not. After all, some people create stuff to use as gifts for others. Yet, while some craft projects might inspire love and adoration, others not so much. Still, while I could go on and on about the nice little craft ideas and such, you would find that boring. Instead, I’ll feature pictures of DIY craft projects that are so crazy and terrible that you’d wonder why anyone would buy them off Etsy. If not, then perhaps make you scratch your head as to why anyone would create such a craftastrophe in the first place. So without further adieu, here are some craft projects you might not want kids doing art class. By the way, this post may not be safe for work.

1. If you want to make baby’s first Thanksgiving memorable, perhaps you can put them in this cute little turkey costume.

Let's just say, when this baby grows up, he's going to look at his old baby pictures and wonder what the hell were his parents thinking. Seriously, this is pretty disturbing.

Let’s just say, when this baby grows up, he’s going to look at his old baby pictures and wonder what the hell were his parents thinking. Seriously, this is pretty disturbing.

2. Brave the elements with this knitted poncho headdress.

Now while I'm sure this poncho can keep you warm, I'm not sure if it can keep you immune from embarrassment. Still, seems more of a cross between knitted table cloth and something you'd see in a fashion show in Saudi Arabia.

Now while I’m sure this poncho can keep you warm, I’m not sure if it can keep you immune from embarrassment. Still, seems more of a cross between knitted table cloth and something you’d see at a fashion show in Saudi Arabia.

3. Behold, a style of sunglasses inspired by the flamboyant fashion sense of Lady Gaga and the 1340s Bubonic Plague doctor.

Yeah, I'm sure this sunglasses style plays less what you'd see in a Lady Gaga music video and more of a cross between Lady Gaga meets Big Bird's evil twin.

Yeah, I’m sure this sunglasses style plays less what you’d see in a Lady Gaga music video and more of a cross between Lady Gaga meets Big Bird’s evil twin.

4. Bundle up with this state of the art boob scarf.

Now I don't know this item's effectiveness against winter weather. However, I'm sure that wearing it will give you a lot of unwanted attention, especially if you're a guy.

Now I don’t know this item’s effectiveness against winter weather. However, I’m sure that wearing it will give you a lot of unwanted attention, especially if you’re a guy.

5. Ladies, walk on the street in style with these fancy slug brooches.

Seriously, what kind of girl would want to be seen wearing these things? I mean they may seem rather nice but the concept of slug brooches is kind of disgusting.

Seriously, what kind of girl would want to be seen wearing these things? I mean they may seem rather nice but the concept of slug brooches is kind of disgusting. More like collectibles for young boys.

6. Scrub yourself off after the big game with some Buffalo Wings and celery soap.

I'm sure no little kid is going to see these and mistake this soap set for the real thing. Yeah right. Still, why make soap that resembles food?

I’m sure no little kid is going to see these and mistake this soap set for the real thing. Yeah right. Still, why make soap that resembles food?

7. Give your sweetheart a reminder to practice safe sex with this lovely condom flower bouquet.

I'm sure every girl out there wants their boyfriend to send them a dozen condom flowers for Valentine's Day. For God's sake this bouquet is in such poor taste as well as the fact you'd be embarrassed to have such a display in your home. This is especially true if you or your guests have kids. Perhaps these would look better in a love nest or sex dungeon.

I’m sure every girl out there wants their boyfriend to send them a dozen condom flowers for Valentine’s Day. For God’s sake this bouquet is in such poor taste as well as the fact you’d be embarrassed to have such a display in your home. This is especially true if you or your guests have kids. Perhaps these would look better in a love nest or sex dungeon.

8. Now grace your house with this knitted pig being cut open on a platter.

I wonder if Jewish or Muslim parents would buy such an item for their kids so they could make them too traumatized to eat pork, ham, sausage, or bacon. Yeah, this is very disturbing.

I wonder if Jewish or Muslim parents would buy such an item for their kids so they could make them too traumatized to eat pork, ham, sausage, or bacon. Yeah, this is very disturbing.

9. Scrub yourself squeakly clean with these soap dentures.

Let's hope that these never show up in any home for the elderly shall we? After all, some may mistake this for their own set of dentures if you know what I mean.

Let’s hope that these never show up in any home for the elderly shall we? After all, some may mistake this for their own set of dentures if you know what I mean.

10. Add a little character to you lawn with this Duck Lady statue.

Now having a statue of a naked woman is one thing, but with her sporting a duck's head. Well, that's just an all too tacky lawn ornament to ignore. Seriously, this is just a terrible statue.

Now having a statue of a naked woman is one thing, but with her sporting a duck’s head. Well, that’s just an all too tacky lawn ornament to ignore. Seriously, this is just a terrible statue.

11. Protect yourself with this tampon gun and bullets.

I always thought tampons were just feminine hygiene products meant to protect women from dirtying their clothes during their time of the month. I guess they're also great for home security as well.

I always thought tampons were just feminine hygiene products meant to protect women from dirtying their clothes during their time of the month. I guess they’re also great for home security as well.

12. Now these soaps with razor blades make great gifts for the whole family.

I'm sure everyone in your family would love to have soaps like these. Well, anyone in your family serving time in the state penitentiary that is. However, I'm sure these would get confiscated by the guards upon entry regardless.

I’m sure everyone in your family would love to have soaps like these. Well, anyone in your family serving time in the state penitentiary that is. However, I’m sure these would get confiscated by the guards upon entry regardless.

13. Give your child a unicorn bike they will certainly treasure.

I'm sure this boy is very happy with his new bike as the boy in the background is looking at him with some confused disdain. Still, it's all fun and games until he gets beat up in school for it.

I’m sure this boy is very happy with his new bike as the boy in the background is looking at him with some confused disdain. Still, it’s all fun and games until he gets beat up in school for it.

14. For the upcoming movie 50 Shades of Grey, here’s Barbie as Anastasia Steele with her very own sex dungeon.

Then again, I hear there's a BDSM Dominatrix Barbie as well. Of course, this one comes with her own cat o' nine tails. Yet, I wonder what BDSM Ken looks like.

Then again, I hear there’s a BDSM Dominatrix Barbie as well. Of course, this one comes with her own cat o’ nine tails. Yet, I wonder what BDSM Ken looks like.

15. Please your man this Christmas with these homemade knitted men’s shorts.

Let's just say even if your guy says he likes these, he will never wear them. Seriously, this is a perfectly terrible waste of yarn. Making him an ugly Christmas sweater would've been a better idea.

Let’s just say even if your guy says he likes these, he will never wear them. Seriously, this is a perfectly terrible waste of yarn. Making him an ugly Christmas sweater would’ve been a better idea.

16. Got beer cans? Well, make a lovely flower display with them for your living room.

I'm sure this Heineken six pack tulip planter will only please two kinds of people: rednecks and environmentalists. Other than that, most people would question your taste in interior decorating upon viewing this.

I’m sure this Heineken six pack tulip planter will only please two kinds of people: rednecks and environmentalists. Other than that, most people would question your taste in interior decorating upon viewing this. I’m sure this is a remnant from Martha Stewart’s college years.

17. Be the life of the party with this Pabst can skirt.

Now if this girl's in college, it's very likely that her boyfriend's in a fraternity. Else, how else could she collect all the Pabst beer cans to make this.

Now if this girl’s in college, it’s very likely that her boyfriend’s in a fraternity. Else, how else could she collect all the Pabst beer cans to make this. Still, at least this skirt is bound to slice the crap out of a potential rapist.

18. Make these figurines by creating clay made from the lint in your clothes dryer.

Sure this may look cute but making figurines with dryer lint. Well, that's about up there with knitting with dog hair. Yeah.

Sure this may look cute but making figurines with dryer lint. Well, that’s about up there with knitting with dog hair. Yeah.

19. Step in style with these duck foot pumps to go with your duckface.

Unless your job is to play Daisy Duck in Disney World, then I don't have the slightest idea why any woman wouldn't look stupid in these. Seriously, these are just crazy.

Unless your job is to play Daisy Duck in Disney World, then I don’t have the slightest idea why any woman wouldn’t look stupid in these. Seriously, these are just crazy.

20. Keep your feet warm with these colorful knitted knee socks.

Now I can't decide whether these are clown socks or psychedelic socks. Then again, if they were created by someone who's high and smell like reefer, then it's probably the latter.

Now I can’t decide whether these are clown socks or psychedelic socks. Then again, if they were created by someone who’s high and smell like reefer, then it’s probably the latter.

21. May your DIY crown of thorns not only show your love for Jesus on Easter but also be used a a prop for your local Passion Play.

Now I'm sure there's nothing wrong with using a crown of thorns as a DIY project or Easter decoration. However, it's best that you don't make this item a sacrilegious artifact by using it as an hors de' oerdurve tray. Else, the Lord will smite you.

Now I’m sure there’s nothing wrong with using a crown of thorns as a DIY project or Easter decoration. However, it’s best that you don’t make this item a sacrilegious artifact by using it as an hors de’ oeuvres tray despite the tempting toothpicks. Else, the Lord will smite you. If not, then my grandma certainly will.

22. With this breakfast hat and purse, you will always have it to go.

I'm sure this woman looks so smart with her eggs, sausage, and has browns purse as well as her bacon and eggs hat. Still, I doubt she'd want to show up at the office wearing them.

I’m sure this woman looks so smart with her eggs, sausage, and has browns purse as well as her bacon and eggs hat. Still, I doubt she’d want to show up at the office wearing them, even in the 1980s.

23. Adorn yourself with these lovely earrings with toilet paper made of pearls.

I'm sure no woman would be caught dead wearing these. That is, unless she's interviewing for a job with the sewage authority.

I’m sure no woman would be caught dead wearing these. That is, unless she’s interviewing for a job with the sewage authority or waste management. Or perhaps dating someone from those fields.

24. No girl isn’t all dressed and ready to go unless she has her very own Louis Vuitton assault rifle.

While the Louis Vuitton assault rifle may be one of the most fashionable firearms, but it can kill you. Still, why the hell would anyone make this? It's just so fucked up.

While the Louis Vuitton assault rifle may be one of the most fashionable firearms, but it can kill you. Still, why the hell would anyone make this? It’s just so fucked up.

25. Have any child feel at home with this nice little coat rack of disembodied doll parts.

Now this might be perfectly fine with the Addams family nursery. Yet, I don't think I could say the same about any other kid's room. Seriously, this is bound to cause nightmares.

Now this might be perfectly fine with the Addams family nursery. Yet, I don’t think I could say the same about any other kid’s room. Seriously, this is bound to cause nightmares.

26. Light your rooms with these lovely handbag lamps with feet.

This is basically a perfectly good waste of things you can carry stuff in. Besides, you may have no idea whether these materials are flammable.

This is basically a perfectly good waste of things you can carry stuff in. Besides, you may have no idea whether these materials are flammable.

27. Of course, handbags also make a rather great decoration for lamps as well.

Now if everything is going to hell in a hand basket, might as well scare the hell out of the Devil with this tacky creation.

Now if everything is going to hell in a hand basket, might as well scare the hell out of the Devil with this tacky creation.

28. No woman’s look is complete without a pair of high heels made from deer hooves.

Now I'm sure PETA won't be happy with me posting this. Also, I'm sure deer hoof high heels would make anyone wearing them look absolutely ridiculous.

Now I’m sure PETA won’t be happy with me posting this. Also, I’m sure deer hoof high heels would make anyone wearing them look absolutely ridiculous.

29. This stack of pancakes doesn’t look too happy.

I mean you'd feel upset too if you were covered in butter and maple syrup. I mean nobody wants that.

I mean you’d feel upset too if you were covered in butter and maple syrup. I mean nobody wants that.

30. Now that is one fancy ring.

From Regretsy: "It’s called a 'cocktail ring' because you can balance a 12 ounce tumbler on it. And it’s ceramic, so you’re all set when the hot hors d’oeuvres come out." Yet, I'm not sure if it's also used as a top hat for parrots.

From Regretsy: “It’s called a ‘cocktail ring’ because you can balance a 12 ounce tumbler on it. And it’s ceramic, so you’re all set when the hot hors d’oeuvres come out.” Yet, I’m not sure if it’s also used as a top hat for parrots.

31. Reach for the sky with this Balloon poncho.

From Regretsy: "Kind of like, 'one-size-fits-most' and 'must have.' I'm not sure about 'elegant' and 'poncho,' but then, I haven't seen it in 'Blue Moose in the Woods.'" Also, since I'm way over say, six I'd be embarrassed to wear it.

From Regretsy: “Kind of like, ‘one-size-fits-most’ and ‘must have.’ I’m not sure about ‘elegant’ and ‘poncho,’ but then, I haven’t seen it in ‘Blue Moose in the Woods.'” Also, since I’m way over say, six I’d be embarrassed to wear it.

32. This Gumball Baby Doll is a perfect gift for anyone during all occasions.

Now this doll is bound to give children nightmares. Hell, it's giving me nightmares already. Still, despite the rainbow appearance, it's as creepy as hell.

Now this doll is bound to give children nightmares. Hell, it’s giving me nightmares already. Still, despite the rainbow appearance, it’s as creepy as hell.

33. Honor your home with this one of a kind, Groundhog Native American Shield.

Now from the moment people saw this, they knew there would be 6 more weeks of crap. Also, is that groundhog eating a potato chip? Why?

Now from the moment people saw this, they knew there would be 6 more weeks of crap. Also, is that groundhog eating a potato chip? Why?

34. Have a holly, jolly, hooftastic Christmas with this deer hoof ornament.

For Rudolph so loved the world that he gave his only foot. Still, would you want this thing on your Christmas tree? I doubt it.

For Rudolph so loved the world that he gave his only foot. Still, would you want this thing on your Christmas tree? I doubt it.

35. Enhance your beauty with this eye lash necklace made from real human hair.

Hey, is this necklace winking at me? Still, why would anyone come up with this idea? I mean it's fairly creepy. Also, how?

Hey, is this necklace winking at me? Still, why would anyone come up with this idea? I mean it’s fairly creepy. Also, how?

36. Every girl this Christmas wants an alien nut doll with hair extensions riding a pony.

From Regretsy:  "QUESTIONS 1. What am I looking at? 2. Where did the alien get the horse? Is it an alien horse? If so, does it contain nuts? 2. What if I wanted the head made out a filbert? 3. How much is shipping to Earth? 4. Can I buy this if I have squirrels?"

From Regretsy:
“QUESTIONS
1. What am I looking at?
2. Where did the alien get the horse? Is it an alien horse? If so, does it contain nuts?
2. What if I wanted the head made out a filbert?
3. How much is shipping to Earth?
4. Can I buy this if I have squirrels?”

37. I’m sure a rose hair decoration made from orange peel is a piece of beauty.

I don't know about you but I don't think using a compost piece as a hair decoration is a good idea. In fact, I think it's rather disgusting and highly unsanitary.

I don’t know about you but I don’t think using a compost piece as a hair decoration is a good idea. In fact, I think it’s rather disgusting and highly unsanitary.

38. Make a great presence with this ornate macreme mask.

Of course, this might make a great prop for a Halloween costume. Yet, I'm sure this mask will steal your soul. So don't look at it!

Of course, this might make a great prop for a Halloween costume. Yet, I’m sure this mask will steal your soul. So don’t look at it!

39. “*CIRCLES OF VERISIMILITUDE* represents numerous useful platters, clocks, and mirrors, all created from large metal container lids, 24 inches inches in diameter, and formed from collections of miscellaneous ‘stuff.'”

Well, I'm sure there are worse things you can do with disposable razors. I suppose killing yourself ranks among them. Still, I'm sure if I'd want this for my bourdoir since the mirror seems too small.

Well, I’m sure there are worse things you can do with disposable razors. I suppose killing yourself ranks among them. Still, I’m sure if I’d want this for my bourdoir since the mirror seems too small.

40. Now what young girl doesn’t want a pillow with Tinkerbell’s face on it?

Man, Tinkerbell certainly hasn't aged very well. Also, I don't know about you, but I'm sure she's had Botox injections if you know what I mean. Still, she's really gone downhill since Peter Pan.

Man, Tinkerbell certainly hasn’t aged very well. Also, I don’t know about you, but I’m sure she’s had Botox injections if you know what I mean. Still, she’s really gone downhill since Peter Pan.

41. “Victorian inspired turtle foot, with gold foil, brass wire, and bee detail. Antique green point-back rhinestones add extra sparkle, and the brass dangle gives a touch of whimsy.”

Just what I need for my new outfit: a decaying disembodied turtle foot encrusted in jewels. Wonder what happened to the rest of the turtle.

Just what I need for my new outfit: a decaying disembodied turtle foot encrusted in jewels. Wonder what happened to the rest of the turtle.

42. Light up the party with this one of a kind Yarn Monster Dress.

From Regretsy: "This might be the best 'Girl trying to look sexy in a stupid $335 dress' costume I've seen this year."

From Regretsy: “This might be the best ‘Girl trying to look sexy in a stupid $335 dress’ costume I’ve seen this year.”

43. Use your dad’s unwanted neckties to make your own sexy lingerie.

Seriously, these are thongs and they don't look comfortable by any means. Also, why would anyone do this? It's pretty disturbing if you know what I mean.

Seriously, these are thongs and they don’t look comfortable by any means. Also, why would anyone do this? It’s pretty disturbing if you know what I mean.

44. For those who want to keep their bong with their lighter, here’s a rainbow bong cozy.

Now unless you live in an area where pot's legalized, I'm sure you'll be arrested for selling either of these drug paraphernalia items on the internet. I mean look what happened to Tommy Chong.

Now unless you live in an area where pot’s legalized, I’m sure you’ll be arrested for selling either of these drug paraphernalia items on the internet. I mean look what happened to Tommy Chong.

45. Finally a doll house giving a tribute to the hit TV show Hoarders.

This woman really needs to clean her house. And I suppose that she has a ton of cats as well. Still, this is a doll house you'd give to a young girl.

This woman really needs to clean her house. And I suppose that she has a ton of cats as well. Still, this is a doll house you’d give to a young girl.

46. Finally, a little coat and hat set for a cute little chihuahua.

Man, Tinkerbell doesn't look very happy in her new crocheted bundle up set. In fact, she looks really pissed.

Man, Tinkerbell doesn’t look very happy in her new crocheted bundle up set. In fact, she looks really pissed off.

47. Now how about a nice diamond encrusted pennant with some vintage tin can?

Then again, I'm not sure if I'd want to wear a necklace with a tin that says "Ex-Lax, the Chocolate Laxative" on it. Vintage or otherwise.

Then again, I’m not sure if I’d want to wear a necklace with a tin that says “Ex-Lax, the Chocolate Laxative” on it. Vintage or otherwise.

48. Make a giant dream catcher by weaving neck ties and panty hose around a hula hoop.

Then again, I don't know what the hell this thing is. Seriously, the dreamcatcher was the closest approximation in my book. Perhaps it's what a teacher of mine called a "gok" meaning "God Only Knows."

Then again, I don’t know what the hell this thing is. Seriously, the dreamcatcher was the closest approximation in my book. Perhaps it’s what a teacher of mine called a “gok” meaning “God Only Knows.”

49. Take your mom’s tacky garden flamingos and turn them into dragons.

Never in the history of the world has something been so tacky yet so awesome at the same time. Yet, it kind more or less resembles a flamingo cyborg dragon that's painted purple and sprinkled with glitter.

Never in the history of the world has something been so tacky yet so awesome at the same time. Yet, it kind more or less resembles a flamingo cyborg dragon that’s painted purple and sprinkled with glitter.

50. I’m sure your cat would love this little mobile hat of the solar system.

I'm sure this cat seems board of its mind as well as embarrassed to have its picture taken with this solar system hat on its head. Nice try, Sheldon Cooper.

I’m sure this cat seems board of its mind as well as embarrassed to have its picture taken with this solar system hat on its head. Nice try, Sheldon Cooper.

51. If your cat loves to snuggle on your lap, why don’t you give them the next best thing?

This cat is probably thinking: "There's no way in God's green acres that I'm sitting sleeping on this pair of legs. No way in hell. Also, where are the torso and hands to stroke my fur? And where's it's head?"

This cat is probably thinking: “There’s no way in God’s green acres that I’m sitting sleeping on this pair of legs. No way in hell. Also, where are the torso and hands to stroke my fur? And where’s it’s head?”

52. For the first time ever, I bring you Potato Sack Couture.

Now I didn't know that the Paris Runway was featuring Boise for Fashion week this year. Guess those down home farm fashions are coming back.

Now I didn’t know that the Paris Runway was featuring Boise for Fashion week this year. Guess those down home farm fashions are coming back.

53. For those who want to relive key moments from The Wire, here are some miniature blocks of crack or what’s referred to as, “product.”

Now if only if they come up with a line of The Wire action figures like they did with Breaking Bad. Of course, Omar's would sell off the charts.

Now if only if they come up with a line of The Wire action figures like they did with Breaking Bad. Of course, Omar’s would sell off the charts.

54. And now a replica of Roary, mascot for the Detroit Lions.

Looks more like an appropriate mascot for the Detroit Pistons to me. That or perhaps what you get if the Terminator mated with the giant demonic blue horse at the Denver Airport.

Looks more like an appropriate mascot for the Detroit Pistons to me. That or perhaps what you get if the Terminator mated with the giant demonic blue horse at the Denver Airport.

55. Now nothing says cozy than a pair of bedroom slippers made from Maxi pads.

Seriously, who thought this was a good idea? And yes, I do wear Maxi pads on a monthly basis but that's where the sun don't shine. So if I had some kind of emergency during my time of the month does that mean I could wear one of these in my underwear?

Seriously, who thought this was a good idea? And yes, I do wear Maxi pads on a monthly basis but that’s where the sun don’t shine. So if I had some kind of emergency during my time of the month does that mean I could wear one of these in my underwear?

56. And now a crocheted reenactment of The Exorcist.

Now this scene is disgusting enough. Yet, let's just say if this makes your stomach upset, then you don't want to see how this scene plays out in the movie. Seriously, you don't.

Now this scene is disgusting enough. Yet, let’s just say if this makes your stomach upset, then you don’t want to see how this scene plays out in the movie. Seriously, you don’t.

57. Finally, a nice soap for young girls.

For God's sake, what's with the "Face Soap, Not Balls Soap" disclaimer. I'm sure there's no man who'd want to scrub his testicles with a soap that's meant for young girls. I mean what the hell?

For God’s sake, what’s with the “Face Soap, Not Balls Soap” disclaimer. I’m sure there’s no man who’d want to scrub his testicles with a soap that’s meant for young girls. I mean what the hell?

58. Seems E. T. didn’t have a good time in Las Vegas.

And I thought E. T. was such a sweet alien from what I've seen in the movie. Looks like my childhood is ruined since E. T.'s hung over, fresh from a fight, and has a real attitude problem.

And I thought E. T. was such a sweet alien from what I’ve seen in the movie. Looks like my childhood is ruined since E. T.’s hung over, fresh from a fight, and has a real attitude problem.

59. Now even a young girl can have her very own Sasquatch baby doll to call her own.

Eddie Munster, meet your new baby sister Debbie. I'm sure you two will get along great together since she looks a lot like you.

Eddie Munster, meet your new baby sister Debbie. I’m sure you two will get along great together since she looks a lot like you.

60. Relive your experience in high school biology class with this dissected frog knit display.

Now I remember why I didn't want to take a biology class in college and opted for geology and chemistry instead during my sophomore year. Of course, the chemistry class pertained to nutrition and hearing about Type II Diabetes every week, but that's beside the point.

Now I remember why I didn’t want to take a biology class in college and opted for geology and chemistry instead during my sophomore year. Of course, the chemistry class pertained to nutrition and hearing about Type II Diabetes every week, but that’s beside the point.

61. Nothing makes an ocean home better than a mirror decorated from inedible crab legs.

Now in regards to ocean style decor, this is quite terrifying if you know what I mean. This especially true if you have some idea where these legs came from.

Now in regards to ocean style decor, this is quite terrifying if you know what I mean. This especially true if you have some idea where these legs came from.

62. Now this seems like a truly relaxing couch pillow.

If the famous Cubist painter Pablo Picasso did couch pillows, they would've looked like this. Yet, I suppose they would've been more colorful.

If the famous Cubist painter Pablo Picasso did couch pillows, they would’ve looked like this. Yet, I suppose they would’ve been more colorful.

63. And now, three new flavors of lip balm for men.

I don't know about you but I kind of consider the idea of bacon, pizza, and dill pickle lip balm flavors rather disgusting. I mean applying these might make some people think you have a severe case of halitosis or just haven't brushed your teeth.

I don’t know about you but I kind of consider the idea of bacon, pizza, and dill pickle lip balm flavors rather disgusting. I mean applying these might make some people think you have a severe case of halitosis or just haven’t brushed your teeth.

64. May I present to you a unique artistic rendition of a liver transplant.

Now I don't know about you but I see something sinister in that surgeon. Also, is that patient George W. Bush? Looks like it. Then again, Bush is an alcoholic whether he's been drinking or not as well as a horrible president.

Now I don’t know about you but I see something sinister in that surgeon. Also, is that patient George W. Bush? Looks like it. Then again, Bush is an alcoholic whether he’s been drinking or not as well as a horrible president. Also, I wonder if there’s one of a proctologist or someone getting a colonoscopy.

65. I’m sure these are salt and pepper shakers, honestly.

Still, knowing that the "P" can mean "pee" or "piss" while the "s" could pertain to "shit," let's just say the premise of outhouse salt and pepper shakers is rather disgusting once you really think about it.

Still, knowing that the “P” can mean “pee” or “piss” while the “s” could pertain to “shit,” let’s just say the premise of outhouse salt and pepper shakers is rather disgusting once you really think about it.

66. Adorn your living room with these giant pillows of rotten bananas.

I'm sure the person who made these was planning on doing banana pillows but couldn't find any yellow fabric. So he or she probably settled with black instead. Still, rather disgusting if you know what I mean.

I’m sure the person who made these was planning on doing banana pillows but couldn’t find any yellow fabric. So he or she probably settled with black instead. Still, rather disgusting if you know what I mean.

67. And now, a great fashion runway show featuring the Hamburger Monster Yarn Dress.

I guess this Yarn Hamburger Queen dress was one of the failed attempts for McDonalds to find a new companion for the Hamburglar. Yet, only the Hamburglar would know that this dress was good enough to eat.

I guess this Yarn Hamburger Queen dress was one of the failed attempts for McDonalds to find a new companion for the Hamburglar. Yet, only the Hamburglar would know that this dress was good enough to eat.

68. I now introduce you to Chewbacca, master of seduction.

Now let's say that there are some women who may find a walking carpet like Chewie rather sexy, but those girls usually attend furry conventions. Still, this is a great Star Wars take off from that picture of George in that Seinfeld episode.

Now let’s say that there are some women who may find a walking carpet like Chewie rather sexy, but those girls usually attend furry conventions. Still, this is a great Star Wars take off from that picture of George in that Seinfeld episode.

69. In the NSA even the coffeemakers are spies.

Don't look now but whenever someone in the NSA gets a cup of joe, this coffee machine is watching them every second of the day. Talk about terrifying.

Don’t look now but whenever someone in the NSA gets a cup of joe, this coffee machine is watching them every second of the day. Talk about terrifying.

70. Grace your living room with this lovely coffin couch.

I'm sure this coffin would go very well in Dracula's Transylvania Castle. I'm sure it would be a great place for him to sleep whenever his wife banishes him from their double coffin during the day.

I’m sure this coffin would go very well in Dracula’s Transylvania Castle. I’m sure it would be a great place for him to sleep whenever his wife banishes him from their double coffin during the day.

71. During Halloween, perhaps you can dispense little pumpkin soaps to trick or treaters.

I'm sure kids would know that these pumpkin soaps aren't real candy they could eat. Well, any kid over the age of 6 anyway.

I’m sure kids would know that these pumpkin soaps aren’t real candy they could eat. Well, any kid over the age of 6 anyway.

72. Finally, a nice hand crocheted cozy for your vibrator.

Seriously, a cozy for a vibrator? Now I haven't heard that before. Still, why?

Seriously, a cozy for a vibrator? Now I haven’t heard that before. Still, why make a cozy for a sex toy? Why?

73. Get in the fall spirit wit this turkey feather headdress.

Looks more like something I'd see on my next door neighbor's living room wall than something I'd actually wear on my head. Of course, the turkey in question would've been shot by my neighbors' anyway.

Looks more like something I’d see on my next door neighbor’s living room wall than something I’d actually wear on my head. Of course, the turkey in question would’ve been shot by my neighbors’ anyway.

74. Now I’m sure this is a great Thanksgiving outfit for a toddler girl.

Seriously, this is the toddler equivalent of the ugly Christmas sweater. Also, it's incredibly hideous. If I had a daughter, there's no way in hell I'd have her wear that. That would be too cruel.

Seriously, this is the toddler equivalent of the ugly Christmas sweater. Also, it’s incredibly hideous. If I had a daughter, there’s no way in hell I’d have her wear that. That would be too cruel.

75. While adults have pumpkin spice lattes, it’s only natural for kids to have pumpkin spice Play Dough.

Then again, maybe this autumn pumpkin spice craze might be going too far. Thanks a lot, Starbucks. Of course I was being sarcastic.

Then again, maybe this autumn pumpkin spice craze might be going too far. Thanks a lot, Starbucks. Of course I was being sarcastic.

76. To decorate your living room for Thanksgiving, here’s a painting of a dysfunctional family dinner.

Still, may this dysfunctional family dinner painting be a reminder that you're thankful for having a family that's not like them.

Still, may this dysfunctional family dinner painting be a reminder that you’re thankful for having a family that’s not like them. I mean these people seem very screwed up with several members being alcoholics.

77. For Thanksgiving, why don’t you eat pretzels with these turkey pretzel holders.

Of course, these Thanksgiving pretzel holders could also double as dildos. However, I'm sure a dildo with a turkey face could totally kill the mood.

Of course, these Thanksgiving pretzel holders could also double as dildos. However, I’m sure a dildo with a turkey face could totally kill the mood.

78. Greet the new year with this stunning New Year’s Eve dress.

You may not know it, but this dress also doubles as a bedsheet or drapery. Still, hope this woman has a holed hood to go with it or she may offend many from the African American community.

You may not know it, but this dress also doubles as a bedsheet or drapery. Still, hope this woman has a holed hood to go with it or she may offend many from the African American community.

79. To get in the Christmas spirit, I give you the coal angel.

Of course, this coal angel doesn't seem too happy here. Then again, I'm sure there aren't many kids who'd want her in their stocking. Yet, at least you can toss her in the fire come January.

Of course, this coal angel doesn’t seem too happy here. Then again, I’m sure there aren’t many kids who’d want her in their stocking. Yet, at least you can toss her in the fire come January.

80. Grace your office with this lovely glass paper weight of Swedish ice.

I don't know about you, but this doesn't seem to resemble much of a Swedish iceberg as it tends to look like a glass turd.

I don’t know about you, but this doesn’t seem to resemble much of a Swedish iceberg as it tends to look like a glass turd.

The Wonderful World of Scarecrows

93870-004-5ab35ff6

Soon autumn will be upon us and so would Halloween. Fall is known as the harvest season and one of the most iconic images of harvest is the scarecrow, which is meant to scare birds like crows or sparrows from eating the crops. Yet, I’m sure that the critters would be frightened but a human effigy filled with straw, not. Yet they are seen as cultural icons in literature and are portrayed with different personalities. The Scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz is said to have no brain (or so what he thinks) and does great choreography due to the talents of Ray Bolger. In the Kojiki from 712, the Japanese Kuebiko may no be able to walk but knows everything about the world as well as worshiped as a god of agriculture, wisdom, and scholarship, which is pretty ironic for one to sing, “If I Only Had a Brain.” Then Nathaniel Hawthorne’s Feathertop is in league with the devil and the Scarecrow is seen as a villainous character in the DC universe. Still, there are also a lot of scarecrow festivals which have people making their own straw garden figures such as in the UK since the 1990s, where it is also a significant figure in culture (especially in a nation of gardening fanatics). In this post we cover a lot of people’s fall creations of these loveable straw stuffed icons which I shall list accordingly.

1. “The hills are alive with the sound of scarecrows.”

I'm sorry but Fraulein Maria hailed from Austria not Thornhill. Still, I like how they have

I’m sorry but Fraulein Maria hailed from Austria not Thornhill. Still, I like how they have “Problem, Maria?” on her chest.

2. Hey, I didn’t know I could use one of those to water my plants.

Of course, there's no magic charm to make it animated. Yet, I think this is quite clever.

Of course, there’s no magic charm to make it animated. Yet, I think this is quite clever.

3. Well, as Bob Dylan said, “The answer my friends is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind.”

So this is either a tribute to Bob Dylan's

So this is either a tribute to Bob Dylan’s “Blowin’ in the Wind,” or to Gene Kelly’s “Singin’ in the Rain.” I’ll probably go with the former because I don’t remember Gene Kelly having to cling to a lampost in that movie.

4. Oh, look it’s the Swan Princess.

Then again, this seems like a goose bride than a swan princess. Still, I do love that white dress with the feathers on it. Wonder if its creator ever wore it in her own wedding assuming it's a she.

Then again, this seems like a goose bride than a swan princess. Still, I do love that white dress with the feathers on it. Wonder if its creator ever wore it in her own wedding assuming it’s a she.

5. Of course, what would this post be without a scarecrow of Lady Gaga?

Still, I can't help but be disappointed in this scarecrow. I mean given Lady Gaga's reputation for wearing outlandish outfits, her dress is pretty tame. Perhaps her dressing up as a straw princess or a crow would've been more appropriate.

Still, I can’t help but be disappointed in this scarecrow. I mean given Lady Gaga’s reputation for wearing outlandish outfits, her dress is pretty tame. Perhaps her dressing up as a straw princess or a crow would’ve been more appropriate. The goose bride routine would’ve been perfect.

6. As Forrest Grump said, “Life is like a box of eyeballs, you never know what you’re gonna get.”

Of course, for those who don't know anything about Forrest Grump, it's a lot like Forrest Gump but with zombies. Still, stupid is as stupid does.

Of course, for those who don’t know anything about Forrest Grump, it’s a lot like Forrest Gump but with zombies. Still, stupid is as stupid does.

7. If you’re into cutesy things from Japan, then you’d certainly love this Hello Kitty scarecrow.

Still, I have to explain that it's creator said that Hello Kitty isn't actually a cat. Also, this isn't really a Hello Kitty scarecrow. Yet, I like the bamboo heart.

Still, I have to explain that it’s creator said that Hello Kitty isn’t actually a cat. Also, this isn’t really a Hello Kitty scarecrow. Yet, I like the bamboo heart.

8. Now I didn’t know that there were scarecrows into reggae music.

Still, I'm not sure if newspaper makes convincing dreadlocks. Yet, I have to admire the creator's intent on making a scarecrow that's more eco-friendly.

Still, I’m not sure if newspaper makes convincing dreadlocks. Yet, I have to admire the creator’s intent on making a scarecrow that’s more eco-friendly.

9. Hey, it’s Scarecrow Gru and his pumpkin minions from Despicable Me.

The minions from Despicable Me is a popular scarecrow subject at festivals since they're easy to make. Still, I bet the guy who did this took great advantage of early pumpkin sales and paint.

The minions from Despicable Me is a popular scarecrow subject at festivals since they’re easy to make. Still, I bet the guy who did this took great advantage of early pumpkin sales and paint.

10. “It’s fun to scare at the Y. M. C. A.”

How did they manage to get pumpkin carvings that resembled sport and have them be so smooth like that, I have no idea. This especially goes to the football head.

How did they manage to get pumpkin carvings that resembled sport and have them be so smooth like that, I have no idea. This especially goes to the football head.

11. Hey, I didn’t know they had scarecrow versions of the Munsters.

Seems like a recreation of the time when Herman was talking about proposing to Lily with Grandpa. Then again, it's not that the Munsters see themselves as anything other than being the average American family.

Seems like a recreation of the time when Herman was talking about proposing to Lily with Grandpa. Then again, it’s not that the Munsters see themselves as anything other than being the average American family.

12. “Here comes the sun, and I say, it’s all right.”

Now this scarecrow may seem a little creepy, but I think its folksy disposition makes it a much better spokesman for Jimmy Dean sausage than the Sun they have now.

Now this scarecrow may seem a little creepy, but I think its folksy disposition makes it a much better spokesman for Jimmy Dean sausage than the Sun they have now.

13. It’s Halloween with Charlie Brown and Snoopy.

Well, unlike what you see in the comics, this Charlie Brown scarecrow display seems like a winner as I see from the ribbon.

Well, unlike what you see in the comics, this Charlie Brown scarecrow display seems like a winner as I see from the ribbon.

14. I’ve found Scarecrow Waldo!

Of course, a scarecrow of Waldo isn't really that hard to spot. Still, it's pretty funny.

Of course, a scarecrow of Waldo isn’t really that hard to spot. Still, it’s pretty funny.

15. Of course, scarecrows aren’t just a thing in the west you know.

I mean Japan has worshiped one as a god for years. Still, I'm sure you couldn't tell this family was Asian if you didn't see what the dad was wearing.

I mean Japan has worshiped one as a god for years. Still, I’m sure you couldn’t tell this family was Asian if you didn’t see what the dad was wearing.

16. Ladies and gentleman, may introduce to you the Tinman’s brother, Watering Can Man.

Of course, unlike his famous brother from The Wizard of Oz, Watering Can Man works in the landscaping business as shown by his gardening implements.

Of course, unlike his famous brother from The Wizard of Oz, Watering Can Man works in the landscaping business as shown by his gardening implements.

17. Well, wedding bales are surely ringing in this time of year.

Notice that I said,

Notice that I said, “wedding bales” instead of “wedding bells.” Still, these two really seem to be made for each other. Then again, they literally are.

18. My, my, that’s one purdy scare cow you have there, sir.

Seriously, if it weren't for the straw sticking out, I'd sure almost mistake that cow as the real thing or a large stuffed animal.

Seriously, if it weren’t for the straw sticking out, I’d sure almost mistake that cow as the real thing or a large stuffed animal.

19. Now here’s a nice tribute for Gone with the Wind with a Scarlett O’Hara scarecrow.

Actually, that's Scarlett O'Hara from the Gone with the Wind spoof on The Carol Burnett Show. Of course, she just saw that curtain dress in the window and just had to have it.

Actually, that’s Scarlett O’Hara from the Gone with the Wind spoof on The Carol Burnett Show. Of course, she just saw that curtain dress in the window and just had to have it.

20. Never in my life have I seen a firefighter so flammable as this one.

Of course, this scarecrow was probably made by a local fire department. Yet, I'm not sure if being stuffed with straw makes a good firefighter.

Of course, this scarecrow was probably made by a local fire department. Yet, I’m not sure if being stuffed with straw makes a good firefighter.

21. Hey, look, it’s the Cheese String Man.

Of course, this might be at tribute to WuShock, the mascot from Wichita State, but I hope not. Still, Cheese String Man is much better as a scarecrow.

Of course, this might be at tribute to WuShock, the mascot from Wichita State, but I hope not. Still, Cheese String Man is much better as a scarecrow.

22. Ladies and gentlemen, the Beatles.

You know that I wasn't going to leave out the Beatles, did you? I always seem to have the Beatles in Sand Sculptures in Peep Dioramas for some reason.

You know that I wasn’t going to leave out the Beatles, did you? I always seem to have the Beatles in Sand Sculptures in Peep Dioramas for some reason.

23. Of course, I’m sure that a Hipster Scarecrow can do the job of scaring critters.

I'm sure nobody wants to hear what this scarecrow has on his or her ipod. I mean crows just can't stand the music from Counting Crows, get it?

I’m sure nobody wants to hear what this scarecrow has on his or her ipod. I mean crows just can’t stand the music from Counting Crows, get it?

24. So would you want some milk with that?

I'm sure that scarecrow's mother is worried about him possibly breaking his neck when he's climbing buildings like this. Still, pretty clever.

I’m sure that scarecrow’s mother is worried about him possibly breaking his neck when he’s climbing buildings like this. Still, pretty clever.

25. Of course, no scarecrow post would be complete without a tribute to Grant Wood’s American Gothic.

Now I'm sure Depression era farmers would have much better things to do than just make scarecrows for some contest like surviving the Dust Bowl. Still, American Gothic is a very iconic American painting.

Now I’m sure Depression era farmers would have much better things to do than just make scarecrows for some contest like surviving the Dust Bowl. Still, American Gothic is a very iconic American painting.

26. Now I can’t believe crows could ever do this to each other.

Still, despite unfortunate implications, I'm sure this scarecrow display may actually scare crows. I mean to them, it's suggestive of cannibalism.

Still, despite unfortunate implications, I’m sure this scarecrow display may actually scare crows. I mean to them, it’s suggestive of cannibalism.

27. Even scarecrows need self-help books about scaring crows now and then.

I mean no scarecrow is born with the innate ability to scare crows. Crow scaring is an art that needs to be learned.

I mean no scarecrow is born with the innate ability to scare crows. Crow scaring is an art that needs to be learned.

28. Of course, you can’t have a scarecrow contest without one of Edward Scissorhands.

Sure he may have scissors as hands, but Edward isn't that scary once you get to know him. In fact, he's quite nice really but that doesn't mean you should shake hands with him.

Sure he may have scissors as hands, but Edward isn’t that scary once you get to know him. In fact, he’s quite nice really but that doesn’t mean you should shake hands with him.

29. Of course, you can’t have a scarecrow post without posting a display from The Wizard of Oz.

Because one of the main characters we remember from that movie is a scarecrow. Get it? Still, looks pretty creepy.

Because one of the main characters we remember from that movie is a scarecrow. Get it? Still, looks pretty creepy.

30. Hey, look, it’s the Justice League of scarecrows.

Wait a minute, the Incredible Hulk is from Marvel and an Avenger. Also, where the hell is Batman? Oh, well.

Wait a minute, the Incredible Hulk is from Marvel and an Avenger. Also, where the hell is Batman? Oh, well.

31. Scarecrows don’t seem to be very good in skiing do they?

I mean skiing scarecrows always seem to be running in to something like poles.

I mean skiing scarecrows always seem to be running in to something like poles.

32. Looks like Darth Vader is occupied with some recreational reading right now.

I wouldn't disturb him if I were you. I mean you don't want him to force choke you? Oh, wait he does that to guys who fail him.

I wouldn’t disturb him if I were you. I mean you don’t want him to force choke you? Oh, wait he does that to guys who fail him.

33. Since when do crows actually wear clothes?

Sure it's cute and sharp dressed. However, I hopes it's not one of the racist crow caricatures from Dumbo. You don't want any unfortunate implications there.

Sure it’s cute and sharp dressed. However, I hopes it’s not one of the racist crow caricatures from Dumbo. You don’t want any unfortunate implications there.

34. Hey, I’ve never seen an invisible scarecrow before.

I'm sure the crows would be more frightened by an invisible scarecrow than a visible one. Still, it's pretty clever if I do say so myself.

I’m sure the crows would be more frightened by an invisible scarecrow than a visible one. Still, it’s pretty clever if I do say so myself and he seems rather friendly.

35. Of course, you might not want to go anywhere near this scarecrow crime scene or contamination site.

“I’m afraid this one died from a wound that resulted in the loss of an excessive amount of straw. I say it was the neighborhood dog.”

36. Hey, it’s nice that these two scarecrow ladies seem nice enough to offer refreshments.

Now I'm sure these two are from a movie I've seen or something but I'm not sure where from. Still, they seem pretty creepy if you ask me. I mean they seem to hate their waitress jobs so much that they're willing to kill a few unsatisfied customers for kicks.

Now I’m sure these two are from a movie I’ve seen or something but I’m not sure where from. Still, they seem pretty creepy if you ask me. I mean they seem to hate their waitress jobs so much that they’re willing to kill a few unsatisfied customers for kicks.

37. This scarecrow seems to be on his way of becoming an artiste.

Wow, that picture really looks just like him which is more than I can say about anything I could do.

Wow, that picture really looks just like him which is more than I can say about anything I could do. Seriously, he has a lot of talent.

38. Seems like a great graveyard wedding going on here.

I'm sure this ghost or corpse bride will be very happy with her new accountant ghost for all eternity. Of course, he doesn't seem to be that scary.

I’m sure this ghost or corpse bride will be very happy with her new accountant ghost for all eternity. Of course, he doesn’t seem to be that scary.

39. Seems that this scarecrow is doing some surveying work during this time.

I hope this scarecrow isn't from the gas companies. I seriously hope he's not. Let's just say I have absolutely no confidence that fracking is safe and leave it at that.

I hope this scarecrow isn’t from the gas companies. I seriously hope he’s not. Let’s just say I have absolutely no confidence that fracking is safe and leave it at that.

40. “Hello, hello, hello, what have we got here?”

In the world of British murder mysteries, this scene may look like a suicide judging by the gas can and shoes. However, it's actually murder though I'm not sure who did it.

In the world of British murder mysteries, this scene may look like a suicide judging by the gas can and shoes. However, it’s actually murder though I’m not sure who did it.

41. Wow, I didn’t know they had scarecrow fairies out there.

She does have a very pretty dress and wings as well as seems like something designed by a 10 year old girl. Still, I can't hate this.

She does have a very pretty dress and wings as well as seems like something designed by a 10 year old girl. Still, I can’t hate this.

42. Hey, it’s Catwoman!

Of course, while Catwoman would've had an easier life if she'd just marry Batman, she seems to like stealing things for some reason. Still, reminds me of the Catwoman from the 1960s show more than anything.

Of course, while Catwoman would’ve had an easier life if she’d just marry Batman, she seems to like stealing things for some reason. Still, reminds me of the Catwoman from the 1960s show more than anything.

43. Looks like this scarecrow knows what to do with that old broken down tractor.

Of course, this is how people go on fall hayrides in Venice, Italy. Still, I'm not sure about the whole water hayride bit.

Of course, this is how people go on fall hayrides in Venice, Italy. Still, I’m not sure about the whole water hayride bit.

44. Look, it’s Linus in the pumpkin patch waiting for the Great Pumpkin.

Of course, we all should know that Linus tends to waste his Halloween waiting for the Great Pumpkin every year. Let's face it, the Great Pumpkin never comes.

Of course, we all should know that Linus tends to waste his Halloween waiting for the Great Pumpkin every year. Let’s face it, the Great Pumpkin never comes, kids.

45. Just a bunch of camping scarecrows roasting marshmallows by the fire.

Seems that they seem to like camping despite that a campfire would basically consume them in flames. Still, who doesn't love smores?

Seems that they seem to like camping despite that a campfire would basically consume them in flames. Still, who doesn’t love smores?

46. Hey, look, it’s the guys from ZZTop.

Hey isn't there supposed to be a third guy? Then again, it's not like we notice him anyway. Still, you have to love those guys' awesome beards.

Hey isn’t there supposed to be a third guy? Then again, it’s not like we notice him anyway. Still, you have to love those guys’ awesome beards.

47. For you Olympic lovers out there, here’s a scarecrow of Michael Phelps to tell you he’s the greatest swimmer around.

Of course, Michael Phelps didn't win all those gold medals from nothing. Still, who cares whether he was caught smoking pot from a bong?

Of course, Michael Phelps didn’t win all those gold medals from nothing. Still, who cares whether he was caught smoking pot from a bong?

48. Well, I didn’t know that scarecrows did road construction.

Wait a minute, road season is during the summer while scarecrows are associated with fall. I'm so confused.

Wait a minute, road season is during the summer while scarecrows are associated with fall. I’m so confused. Then again, he may not be from PennDOT since he seems to be coming from a manhole.

49. Can’t do a post for scarecrows without including Wallace and Gromit.

Of course, Wallace is one of the few guys who can don a sweater vest and not have anyone think him lame. Still, without his trusty dog Gromit bailing him out, he'd be sunk.

Of course, Wallace is one of the few guys who can don a sweater vest and not have anyone think him lame. Still, without his trusty dog Gromit bailing him out, he’d be sunk.

50. This scarecrow seems to be from the land of Mexico.

Despite the Mexican stereotypes, this is actually a good Mexican scarecrow, especially with the skull mask from The Day of the Dead. Still, are those cowboy boots?

Despite the Mexican stereotypes, this is actually a good Mexican scarecrow, especially with the skull mask from The Day of the Dead. Still, are those cowboy boots?

51. Hey, keep those pumpkin buns in your pants won’t you?

Sometimes scarecrows can have the poorest manners comparable to fratboys. Still, he should think of the children.

Sometimes scarecrows can have the poorest manners comparable to fratboys. Still, he should think of the children.

52. Look, kiddies, here’s Strawbob Squarepants.

The reason he's called Strawbob is because he's made out of straw not sponge. Of course, I don't need to tell you where this takes off from.

The reason he’s called Strawbob is because he’s made out of straw not sponge. Of course, I don’t need to tell you where this takes off from.

53. Of course, all scarecrow race car drivers need a pit stop now and then.

Still, we should probably give this guy some privacy as he does his duty.

Still, we should probably give this guy some privacy as he relieves himself.

54. Hey, what the hell is this supposed to be? An escaped inmate from the asylum?

Actually, this would make a good scarecrow of Lady Gaga. Still, this will certainly scare crows if you know what I mean.

Actually, this would make a good scarecrow of Lady Gaga. Still, this will certainly scare crows if you know what I mean.

55. Now that scarecrow lady seems to have had too much plastic surgery.

Still, I can't help but wonder if this one was made for some theme park or something. It doesn't seem to be made from old clothes.

Still, I can’t help but wonder if this one was made for some theme park or something. It doesn’t seem to be made from old clothes or pumpkins.

56. Since October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, here are some scarecrows in pink.

Sure it may seem childish or a little girl's dream but it's for a good cause nonetheless. And breast cancer is a very nasty disease that does kill people.

Sure it may seem childish or a little girl’s dream but it’s for a good cause nonetheless. And breast cancer is a very nasty disease that does kill people.

57. Who’s my little scarecrow? You are, you are.

Now that is one creepy little scarecrow. Imagine what he'll become when he gets older. Also, what's that in his bowl?

Now that is one creepy little scarecrow. Imagine what he’ll become when he gets older. Also, what’s that in his bowl?

58. Who knew that a scarecrow could look so good in a pink dress?

Still, I wonder how the flowers seem to be so lifelike yet not appear to die. Oh, I get it they're fake.

Still, I wonder how the flowers seem to be so lifelike yet not appear to die. Oh, I get it they’re fake.

59. Of course, scarecrows do have their share of potheads.

I mean scarecrows that have pots for heads, get it? Still, this one does seem to sport a hair style that seems to remind me of someone off The Simpsons.

I mean scarecrows that have pots for heads, get it? Still, this one does seem to sport a hair style that seems to remind me of someone off The Simpsons.

60. Of course, sometimes you have to make a scarecrow with all you got, even stuff from a junkyard.

Of course, he doesn't really look that bad save being a bit rusty. Also, the name

Of course, he doesn’t really look that bad save being a bit rusty. Also, the name “Rusty” kind of suits him.

61. Just a lovely afternoon with the Tinman, his wife, and their dog.

Yes, they have flowers on their heads. Yes, that's a dog made out of cans. And yes, Mrs. Tinman's breasts are cone shaped. Still, it's just a scarecrow display, man.

Yes, they have flowers on their heads. Yes, that’s a dog made out of cans. And yes, Mrs. Tinman’s breasts are cone shaped. Still, it’s just a scarecrow display, man.

62. Man, that scarecrow must be very strong to lift weights like that.

Seems pretty strong despite his thin arms. Then again, those bar bells seemed to be made of plastic.

Seems pretty strong despite his thin arms. Then again, those bar bells seemed to be made of plastic.

63. Bring in the harvest season with the spirit of fall.

Of course, I wonder how she managed to make a skirt out of those leaves. Yet, I love her sunflower laden hair.

Of course, I wonder how she managed to make a skirt out of those leaves. Yet, I love the sunflowers in her hair. Still, seems like an oversized rag doll.

64. Just a little girl crossing a bridge with a big troll in her way.

I know this is perhaps from some Asian story but I'm not sure what tale it is. Seems like a an Asian take off from

I know this is perhaps from some Asian story but I’m not sure what tale it is. Seems like a an Asian take off from “The Three Billy Goats Gruff” for me.

65. Even scarecrows can be real knit wits if you know what I mean.

How does this scarecrow manage to make colorful outfits without moving its arms I have no idea. Still, very pretty.

How does this scarecrow manage to make colorful outfits without moving its arms I have no idea. Still, very pretty.

66. Ladies and gentlemen, Counting Crows.

Forgot that Counting Crows didn't consist of actual crows. My mistake. Probably just a cover group.

Forgot that Counting Crows didn’t consist of actual crows. My mistake. Probably just a cover group.

67. Sometimes scarecrows like to be behind the camera.

Of course, I kind of find the concept with this one behind a camcorder rather creepy if you ask me.

Of course, I kind of find the concept with this one behind a camcorder rather creepy if you ask me.

68. Sometimes scarecrows just like to dress up.

And I see this group of pumpkin headed straw stuffed people are very much styling.

And I see this group of pumpkin headed straw stuffed people are very much styling. Still, I’m not sure about the guy’s suit though. Looks like pajamas.

69. Sometimes scarecrows are used to protect crops and sometimes they are made out of them.

This one won't be scaring crows as much as helping critters to an all you can eat buffet. Seriously, it's basically saying,

This one won’t be scaring crows as much as helping critters to an all you can eat buffet. Seriously, it’s basically saying, “Eat me!”

70. Scarecrow Mona Lisa seems to like sitting on a ledge.

Of course, she's sitting on a chair on a railing. Still, you have to include a Mona Lisa scarecrow in this post.

Of course, she’s sitting on a chair on a railing. Still, you have to include a Mona Lisa scarecrow in this post.

71. A scarecrow mother’s work is never done.

This is especially true if she's working a shift as a cashier at some grocery store which I think this one does.

This is especially true if she’s working a shift as a cashier at some grocery store which I think this one does.

72. Man, seems like scarecrow nuns really like to jam to music.

Of course, we all know that these scarecrow nuns are singing,

Of course, we all know that these scarecrow nuns are singing, “How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria?” The priest is just trying to do the Robot but is really bad at it.

73. Sometimes scarecrows can catch certain moments you remember like the scene from Titanic.

Of course, we all know what happens to Jack after this. Still, how did this person have all that time on their hands to design this?

Of course, we all know what happens to Jack after this. Still, how did this person have all that time on their hands to design this?

74. This scarecrow seems to really like the birds.

Still, she's a scarecrow which means she usually tries to scare crows. Still, I'm sure she delights in those paper birds.

Still, she’s a scarecrow which means she usually tries to scare crows. Still, I’m sure she delights in those paper birds.

75. I’m sure all scarecrows need a place to drink their sorrows away.

Still, you have to admit that making a scarecrow out of corks is a pretty good idea, especially if the display is

Still, you have to admit that making a scarecrow out of corks is a pretty good idea, especially if the display is “Corky’s Bar.”

76. Looks like this guy has the catch of the day.

Of course, this fisherman scarecrow can't catch any fish on dry land. Still, love the raincoat and net.

Of course, this fisherman scarecrow can’t catch any fish on dry land. Still, love the raincoat and net.

77. Of course, if you want to scare dogs, you might want to go with this.

Yeah, since basically Cruella De Vil wants to make coats from domestic dog fur. Such acts are illegal and really won't make you any friends with the ASPCA or the Humane Society.

Yeah, since basically Cruella De Vil wants to make coats from domestic dog fur. Such acts are illegal and really won’t make you any friends with the ASPCA or the Humane Society.

78. Seems like the wind so strong he’s trying not to get blown away.

Then again, straw is a fairly light material. Still, I think this scarecrow display is quite funny as he's hanging from a pole.

Then again, straw is a fairly light material. Still, I think this scarecrow display is quite funny as he’s hanging from a pole.

79. “Say aah! This won’t hurt a bit.”

Not sure if a dentist scarecrow is guaranteed to scare crows. But it'll sure scare some people who are afraid of dentists.

Not sure if a dentist scarecrow is guaranteed to scare crows. But it’ll sure scare some people who are afraid of dentists.

80. Of course, when it comes to scarecrows, it’s best that you go with a cat one.

Not sure if the Cat in the Hat is guaranteed to scare crows. But since it's the most famous Dr. Seuss character, I'll put it in this post.

Not sure if the Cat in the Hat is guaranteed to scare crows. But since it’s the most famous Dr. Seuss character, I’ll put it in this post.